Posts by bkahn@beige.party
(DIR) Post #AudySbcG7azPRsiwqW by bkahn@beige.party
2025-05-31T01:22:54Z
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I'm only trying to follow the logic.1- AI takes all our jobs.2- No jobs, no money.3- No money, no shopping.4- No shopping, no sales.5- No sales, no income for the big companies that replaced us with AI.6- No sales for the big companies? They all fail. (Little companies all fail too.)7- No big companies? No need for AI.8- AI companies fail. Dang!9- Native Americans purchase Manhattan for $24 and a vintage HP laptop.(10- #9 is just an attempt at humor. Manhattan is mostly under water. Nobody wants to buy it.)11- Now what?I know you're waiting for the ending but although we're rushing towards it, I don't have a clue, sorry. Also I've been ordered to start bringing pairs of animals to the Port of NY. Some guy named Noah? Starting a zoo or something. Hey, it's a job.
(DIR) Post #Auq2h4IuzJZiBtLf60 by bkahn@beige.party
2025-06-06T01:21:50Z
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I have subscribed to the Atlantic Magazine so now I can share with y'all. This one is about mail delivery by mule in the USA. Who knew?https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2025/06/mule-mail-delivery-supai-arizona/682619/?gift=jDw299G8PAYpd8-JGed7UTKbqJ2PEmyWowACulTt_e8&utm_source=copy-link&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=share
(DIR) Post #AutiqaEgPnJRNeT0fQ by bkahn@beige.party
2025-06-07T20:01:11Z
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Just another fantasy moment:All military personnel needed to run the birthday parade call out sick due to headaches, sore throats, and other ailments. It's not like there are tank drivers on every street corner, right?The birthday boy has a total meltdown and is rushed to Walter Reed for observation. Initial reports diagnose a potentially fatal case of SpoiledToddlerSyndrome plus OverEagerEgo and a side-helping of PhattyPhartyPhrenchPhries. Nurses caring for him demand combat pay and threaten to quit.An army officer points out that parking tanks out in the open leaves them wide open to drone attacks. Other officers scoff--"Who fights like that?" they ask.
(DIR) Post #Av1tezek7r1HKCjgBM by bkahn@beige.party
2025-06-11T18:46:09Z
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News from 2027:March 4, 2027:In a moment of lucidity--that is when listeners could understand Trump's mumbling--he announced yet another 90-day extension of the pause on the 2025 tariffs. In other news, old people described to their friends how there were breadlines during the Great Depression and how modern breadlines are different. "Mostly it's the apps," explained Hilda Johnson, aged 104. "There were no mobile phones or apps back in the '30s. It's more convenient now." She paused to reflect. "The bread was chewier back then," she added. "I think it was, anyway."
(DIR) Post #Av2jL1duE2hhJK8zPU by bkahn@beige.party
2025-06-11T22:03:05Z
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Fake scoop! (This is true, but only in my imagination. You've been warned.)Leaked documents reveal a small error in the estimated cost of Trump's birthday parade. "It's just the location of the decimal," said a White House spokesperson spoking off the record.* "We thought it was $45,000,000 but it's actually going to be around $450,000,000. Look at it this way: It costs around 93 million dollars per hour to run the US military. So the parade only costs five hours of military spending. Peanuts."In other news, Trump said anyone caught protesting the parade would be shot at close range with a tank round. "We'll blast them right off the sidewalk!" he gloated. *I have unilaterally decided that spokespersons do not speak--they 'spoke'. In the old days they vouchsafed but no places are safe any more. I can vouch for that.** Don't ask me what happens if a spokesperson begins spoking about speakeasies. I'm too old to parse that. Or maybe too parsimonious. Bye! 😇
(DIR) Post #Av8Vi6oKwXl9aetZcu by bkahn@beige.party
2025-06-14T23:22:35Z
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More from my imagination:Early estimates put voluntary attendees for trump's $45 million dollar military parade at 93, with approximately 370 additional paid onlookers. Hmmm. So roughly $97, 000 per attendee. Shit, send me 97k Mr. Pres. and I'll try to attend the next parade. Better yet, since I hear you're raking in 100s of millions from crypto grift and bribes, how about you pay for your own goddam birthday parties from now on. Show your big heart and generous spirit. 💩 s to you, sir. Many happy returns of the day.This isn't true either:Now for sale on my website: AI piloted kites! Launch them from ANYWHERE in the lower 48 and the kites will fly over the White House trailing the banner of your choice. Limit 200 characters. We also offer kites that will sail over the MargoLargo clubhouse or any trump golf course. Send your personal message to the big man hisself. All profits go to cat and dog charities like the Ollie Fund.**Ollie is my golden doodle. He's a good boy!
(DIR) Post #AvEoH7Ofiiq1fOUg6q by bkahn@beige.party
2025-06-18T00:08:04Z
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@ai6yr Lots of potential for sentences that start with:Can AI _____________ ?Can AI cure heart disease in rabid foxes?Can AI learn to wash dishes by hand?Can AI change diapers?Can AI provide the answer to the ultimate question?Can AI explain projectile vomiting in rabbits?Can AI tell us why some dogs like to eat goat pellets?and so on.
(DIR) Post #AvP1l20nY2hydaWJzE by bkahn@beige.party
2025-06-22T22:27:16Z
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Makes sense to me...Trump: It was all a setup to make me look bad. Biden ordered the bombing of Iran's nuke sites cause he knew that would make oil prices go and up and gas prices go up and who gets the blame? Me, of course! Crooked Joe Biden--what a weasel!
(DIR) Post #AvdSVr0yCzLMXEqk8u by bkahn@beige.party
2025-06-29T21:32:50Z
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Better to have the info than not:https://www.wired.com/story/the-wired-guide-to-protecting-yourself-from-government-surveillance/
(DIR) Post #AwVUydPMKWOOsXPGXw by bkahn@beige.party
2025-07-25T20:44:23Z
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I was thinking on my way home about actual real immigrants that I know or have known over the past 20 years or so. I'll limit details for privacy sake.One woman, quite possibly one of the smartest people I've ever met, graduated with honors from a college in Maine, fluent in 5 or 6 languages (I mean native speaker fluent!), became a Presidential Scholar...super accomplished. No longer living in the USA but one hell of an 'immigrant'.A friend from Central America, became a US citizen decades ago. Four children, all physicians living and working in the US.Over many years we had a fair number of employees from Rwanda. All smart, polyglots, a couple went on to become nurses, one was married to a Ph.D in pharmacology. All hard-working, ambitious, and motivated to be independent and successful.Yeah, let's protect ourselves from immigrants and put a convicted rapist in the White House. 😩
(DIR) Post #Awd0YmcIIfshu6cLui by bkahn@beige.party
2025-07-29T14:24:35Z
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@Nonilex But imagine how high the number of shootings has to be in order to fall by 866. Madness.
(DIR) Post #AwfOCOuAUA4br1qtbU by bkahn@beige.party
2025-07-30T17:13:29Z
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@rory @pluralistic Not a day goes by when I don't complain about how useless search has become. It's as if all links to anything potentially helpful have been diligently erased and replaced with pig manure. But less wholesome.
(DIR) Post #AxfvuRmYUbDBo7PwUi by bkahn@beige.party
2025-08-29T22:08:42Z
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@Nonilex I'm not holding my breath, but if someday the tariffs are ruled illegal, our family business will be happy to get back the--so far--$11k in tariffs we've paid to the criminals. Plus interest!
(DIR) Post #Ay8fukWGrbMKEnlDjE by bkahn@beige.party
2025-09-12T18:56:02Z
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@futurebird We had earthquake drills (calif.) and fire drills. The good old days when disasters were 'natural' and not man made.
(DIR) Post #B06k1lfwTIxXTgD3RI by bkahn@beige.party
2025-11-08T02:01:07Z
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Has anyone given the Bible or any other religious book to ChatGPT and asked it to 'improve' or 'simplify' or 'clarify' or 'summarize' the contents?Or maybe write a screenplay? Or adapt it for a 20-season TV series???
(DIR) Post #B0eBuBTLbFpJ6eCi6y by bkahn@beige.party
2025-11-23T21:12:13Z
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@stevelieber How long before this: I went to a restaurant and the food was truly horrible. So I complained to the chef and he said, "Talk to the owner." So I complained to the owner and he said, "30% of the food prep is done by an LLM cook. It saves us a fortune! And it washes the dishes, too! Would you like to see it in action?" I said yes, and the cookbot was frying eggs in soapy water. No wonder the food tasted like shit. I wanted to tell the owner that I'd never come back but he'd already been replaced by an LLM owner-bot. So I walked out but on the way I noticed that all the diners were bots, too. Probably they're designed to eat soapy food so problem solved. It's a closed ecosystem and humans are not needed.
(DIR) Post #B138LyYLgWd6HUXQOG by bkahn@beige.party
2025-12-08T20:22:47Z
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@Nonilex That's rich, given that Roberts helped rule that Trump can't be held responsible for any crime committed while President.
(DIR) Post #B1WW5d1EHSMnoSNSZE by bkahn@beige.party
2025-12-23T00:22:42Z
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I bet you didn't know that Trump has renamed every shipwreck in the world regardless of location, age, or country of origin. Since he's wackier than Daffy Duck, his naming system follows no logic. There is now the Mary Trump Rose, the Titanic Trump, the Amoco Trump Cadiz, HMS Magnificent Trump, the Trump Komet, the Florence Trump, and on and on. Clipper ships, light cruisers, destroyers, liners--if it could float, had a name, and sank, its name now includes the immortal T.R.U.M.P.My own guess is that one of his flunkies used TrumpGPT to do the renaming. Donald himself would like the idea of adding his name to so many objects, but too much work to do himself. That might be why the renamed ships include fictional ones like the Argo Trump, HMS Trump Surprise, and The Flying Dutch Trumpman.I can't predict what he'll rename next but a small avian creature said the solar system is overdue for a nomenclature update. Jovian Trump? Trump the Gas Giant? Trump's ASSteroid belt? Craters on the moon? Entire galaxies? The mind boggles.
(DIR) Post #B1qWgCmEhCWKIk0JTE by bkahn@beige.party
2026-01-01T15:25:07Z
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Is peertube a practical alternative to youtube for short instructional videos? Or is anything else an alternative? I know zero about this but would like to know more. Thanks.#Peertube
(DIR) Post #B1uo7gKTPAkJcyXtE8 by bkahn@beige.party
2026-01-03T17:50:31Z
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@Nonilex Send Pete and Marco to Venezuela and tell them to run the country properly. They do not get any support staff. Marco's language skills and Pete's charm should be all they need.