Post AcKqCTMin022cnspP6 by hinindil@paravielfalt.zone
(DIR) More posts by hinindil@paravielfalt.zone
(DIR) Post #AcJcP0LIPkidrNL1ns by rubricappula@paravielfalt.zone
2023-11-29T23:56:43Z
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@Iris @regenbogenfisch Sure, why should there be any good parents, right? Let's just take all the children and give them to pedos. Because there are no bad pedos. Just bad parents.
(DIR) Post #AcJcP2sgyYcZjWyj8S by comrade_lecter@nnia.space
2023-11-30T00:32:21Z
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@rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch they may be well-meaning and kind individuals who are parents. However, that does not mean that the social institution of parenthood is not an oppressive system. And bringing up a child ethically would require regular breaking of laws. There can be, and should be, people who are willing to do it right. But how many? And how many will get away with it legally speaking?We speak of the Catholic church as an institution of grooming. That doesn't mean there can't be individual good Catholics (even priests), but these people are working against the system, and the system is designed to kill them.
(DIR) Post #AcJejaD4yAOkniR2Vk by cottonnsheepp@nnia.space
2023-11-30T00:58:28Z
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@comrade_lecter @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch I don't think anti natalism is the answer. Personally I've advocated for those interested in reproduction to only have one child by birth after Very Careful consideration, and adopt the ones after if they're able. If anyone listens to me *shrug*. I don't think parenthood is inherently bad - it produces people. And people are pretty cool. I don't know what doing away with the "institution of parenthood" (using those quotes in good faith) looks like besides not allowing people to be born.
(DIR) Post #AcJfZZfYE1DuBLXmr2 by luerker@paravielfalt.zone
2023-11-30T01:07:52Z
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@comrade_lecter @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch the "institution of parenthood" as it exist now might be oppressive. But taking kids away from Parents is too. And Parents can do a good job you just need to actually give them resources for it. Society fails that. But it is societies fault not the parents.Yes there are bad parents. Yes children don´t owe anything to there parents. Yes children should be able to decide things for themselves (within reason. They do need to understand the issue first). But to call all parents bad because there are bad parents is simply wrong.
(DIR) Post #AcJfit4JT4sExEZD3g by comrade_lecter@nnia.space
2023-11-30T01:09:35Z
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@cottonnsheepp @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch childbirth and parenthood are two very different things, and I'm not talking about childbirth right now.
(DIR) Post #AcJg5Mnrb00RXtakxE by comrade_lecter@nnia.space
2023-11-30T01:13:40Z
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@luerker @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch the thing is, it's impossible to "do a good job" if you don't actively work against what is expected from you. It is EXPECTED from a parent to be a groomer - to kill the child's will and independence (be that in the form of actively abusing them or just passively going along with certain social expectations, like not letting children walk by themselves). To not be a groomer means to go against your own parents, to go against the society, and the law. And while, again, it's technically doable, how many people actually do it?
(DIR) Post #AcJg9ML3GWJhGM1FTc by cottonnsheepp@nnia.space
2023-11-30T01:14:21Z
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@comrade_lecter @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch Fwiw I cannot see the original context of the thread because Iris has me blocked /nm /nb, so I'm just interested in what your idea as the ideal future. Starting from scratch, what would hypothetical Asme say is the rights/responsibilities of someone who just had a kid? Shrug.You know? I dunno. I'm sorry if it came across as rude. Just trying to find a future worth hoping for lol.
(DIR) Post #AcJgSPBetnX5bDhvIe by luerker@paravielfalt.zone
2023-11-30T01:17:49Z
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@comrade_lecter @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch I walked myself from school to the daycare ... people (my parents, the daycare people and society) expected that from me. What you are describing is american culture not europe ...But it is again the society not the people that are the problem. Parents are people and the Intuition. The statement discussed was "parents are groomers" not "parenthood is grooming" it was person language not institution ... You are saying the church is grooming kids not priests ... that is the problem. Well that and culture ... cause children generally are expected to and enjoy alot more freedom over here ...
(DIR) Post #AcJhFbtkQb3ZDBnCT2 by comrade_lecter@nnia.space
2023-11-30T01:26:41Z
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@luerker @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch by "walk by themselves" I did not mean "get from point A to point B", I meant freely roam around without constant supervision. Something like "wake up at 8 AM on Sunday when the parents are still sleeping and go to a park without warning anyone, then pop in to a friend for breakfast and come back at lunch". I am talking about parents not knowing where their child is or what they are doing, and it being okay.The society consists of people, and the overwhelming majority of people are okay with the current state of things to a significant degree.
(DIR) Post #AcJhkFB6wyIXixWNg8 by comrade_lecter@nnia.space
2023-11-30T01:32:15Z
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@cottonnsheepp @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch in a better world children would be raised by a commune, which means they will get a sample of varying lifestyles, their presence in social spaces will be expected and accommodated, and they will always have a lot of people to choose from when it comes to receiving information and asking for help.
(DIR) Post #AcJhu4mkRhGGO2oXOS by luerker@paravielfalt.zone
2023-11-30T01:34:01Z
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@comrade_lecter @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch Yeah did that too just had to leave a note that I was out and that's it... Children in Germany are expected to roam free. Hack we even have streets that are meant to be playgrounds where cars are tolerated not the other way around. Eg. the street is a place for children first! So yeah children, at least in my experience, are free to roam about.
(DIR) Post #AcKWNVWl5rjNQqYwOO by hinindil@paravielfalt.zone
2023-11-30T10:59:34Z
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@comrade_lecter @luerker @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch You know what we call the parents that constantly surveil their children and do not allow them to roam free? These guys are called helicopter parents, as they always hover over their children. This behavior is bad, I agree. But parenthood in general is not.
(DIR) Post #AcKazfzF3OV6gyLCzo by hinindil@paravielfalt.zone
2023-11-30T11:51:18Z
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@comrade_lecter @cottonnsheepp @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch Like extended family and stuff?
(DIR) Post #AcKkFjpHRifyovPosS by comrade_lecter@nnia.space
2023-11-30T13:35:03Z
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@hinindil @cottonnsheepp @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch not bio relatives. Just people.
(DIR) Post #AcKm36sYcn7ySf3R8i by hinindil@paravielfalt.zone
2023-11-30T13:55:09Z
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@comrade_lecter @cottonnsheepp @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch Extended family does include non-bio relatives.
(DIR) Post #AcKnI2Xv7Gs1Jy5JDM by comrade_lecter@nnia.space
2023-11-30T14:09:05Z
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@hinindil @cottonnsheepp @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch okay, not relatives at all, then. Not uncles' wives or stuff like that. People not related to the child by traditional family structure.
(DIR) Post #AcKqCTMin022cnspP6 by hinindil@paravielfalt.zone
2023-11-30T14:41:42Z
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@comrade_lecter @cottonnsheepp @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch Extended family also included (at least in the areas where I come from) people that worked on the same farm, housemaids, sometimes even friends of the family.
(DIR) Post #AcKsHqQyeENFWkYz8C by comrade_lecter@nnia.space
2023-11-30T15:05:04Z
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@hinindil @cottonnsheepp @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch there are no "friends of the family" because there's no family unit to center this around.
(DIR) Post #AcKzOro6dmbhUYg2qG by cottonnsheepp@nnia.space
2023-11-30T16:24:45Z
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@comrade_lecter @hinindil @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch What happens when a baby is born? Are they automatically placed into some sort of communal system residing with other unrelated children born around the same time? Would birth parent have any visitation rights? I'm concerned about attachment. It's vital for infants to form a strong attachment to at least one caregiver, in most cases this ends up being the birthing parent. In ideal situations, a toddler/young child is able to grow past this and socialize. But infants being passed around (so to speak) to different caretakers have bad mental health outcomes.I would worry without a "Parent" figure, this leads the way to reactive attachment disorder, conduct disorder, etc. that would be widespread in this hypothetical institution. Sorry for all the questions. Curious/gen
(DIR) Post #AcL0HBnAYN436y8qye by comrade_lecter@nnia.space
2023-11-30T16:34:37Z
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@cottonnsheepp @hinindil @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch the birthing parent will be allowed to be a caregiver, or they may ask someone who has more natural inclinations towards it, but this will not be a FAMILY, in the sense that they won't have an authority or priority, and other commune members will be involved and interfere when it seems needed.
(DIR) Post #AcMSpAmxmXDhihzxy4 by hinindil@paravielfalt.zone
2023-12-01T09:29:07Z
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@comrade_lecter @cottonnsheepp @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch Oh, sorry, I wasn't clear. I meant in my definition of the extended family, there would be what is now considered "friends of the family".
(DIR) Post #AcPdElLgZUizMexaka by leviathan@nnia.space
2023-12-02T22:09:56Z
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@comrade_lecter @luerker @rubricappula @Iris @regenbogenfisch I'm chrono 21 and still can't do that 😭