Post ANSA1PVIqJXwALOAdM by sue_donym@spinster.xyz
(DIR) More posts by sue_donym@spinster.xyz
(DIR) Post #ANSA1PVIqJXwALOAdM by sue_donym@spinster.xyz
2022-09-11T10:46:20.668343Z
6 likes, 3 repeats
Interesting article in Common Sense today about the death of dating - however it does only cover straight men.I'm curious as to how other gay people have found dating post-2010. My experience has been poor, I must admit - online dating for a lesbian is essentially like swiping through profiles of men that look like they're auditioning for the role of Buffalo Bill in Silence of the Lambs, then trying to find someone without the ACAB/NO TERFS/theythem trifecta in their profile. It gets depressing and you end up deleting the app and browsing cat rescue websites instead.What's your experience been like? Maybe this is the genesis of an article.
(DIR) Post #ANSLlJSCleWaDd1wQ4 by Chronic-Yonic@spinster.xyz
2022-09-11T13:35:20.066311Z
5 likes, 1 repeats
@sue_donym I can only talk about the first time I went to a lesbian bar when I was 18, in 1972, and till around 1994, when I got into a long-term relationship (we broke up in 2017). Between 1972 and 1994, it was so easy, you just went to a lesbian bar and met other lesbians, for discussions or, sometimes, more. No need to check your beer when you went to the bathroom, no need to make sure you were safe in there, no non-consensual touching and groping and grabbing, nothing that a lot of straight bars *offer* nowadays. Near 1993, I saw a few men, (the chickenshits would come by three or four, so, so much for courage...) trying to crash and gawk. Barmaids would go and tell them to leave, and they would invariably quote the Tranadian Human Rights Charter, that said *no discrimination* based on SEX.A few lesbians would walk over to them and try to convince them to leave, making them see they were invasive. Some of those males, shame faced, would leave, others would stick around, feeling courageous with having their buddies with them. They probably went to gawk, hoping to see hot making out sessions, depraved lesbian sex and orgies out in the open, but once again, we would disappoint. They would eventually leave too.When I came out of the long-term relationship, I looked for lesbian bars and hangouts and nothing was left. NOTHING. Nothing at all, except for an inclusive group or two. Made me rage, because of course, gay men bars were still there, untouched, and they weren't being pestered by trans and TRAs.Tried a couple of dating apps, the last one being Plenty of Fish, but it gets pretty complicated when you can't say *no trans* in your bio otherwise you get banned (like in HER, ironically created for lesbians, once upon a time). The only trick I found was writing my bio in French but I still got TIMs showing interest. Out of disgust, I deleted my accounts, and here I will be forever single. I'm sick of it all.
(DIR) Post #ANSNhPa8F59FyS0PXU by LadyMont@spinster.xyz
2022-09-11T13:58:34.230280Z
2 likes, 1 repeats
@sue_donym Lesbian here. The lesbians I meet my age (34) seem to all be into the gender bender movement, call themselves queer or enby and say twaw and I just can't deal. The only one who wasn't like that, I first off wasn't attracted too and literally had nothing substantial in common with, like zero chemistry. Luckily, I like being on my own. I mean, someone has to keep those visitors numbers up on those cat rescue sites.
(DIR) Post #ANSPJrEVz2QQgvn5VY by Gelatinousrube@spinster.xyz
2022-09-11T14:16:43.380402Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@LadyMont @sue_donym I feel this. I am trying to date someone who lives in a city three hours from here 🤣