Post ADOLrNTO727YKtOOQa by angryandignored@spinster.xyz
(DIR) More posts by angryandignored@spinster.xyz
(DIR) Post #ADOLrNTO727YKtOOQa by angryandignored@spinster.xyz
2020-06-07T21:49:13.019Z
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Safehouse update: Wake up, go down stairs. Spend 5 minutes talking to transwoman hear him exclaim how he has a dress on and is excited to "fluant my body" try not to encourage that, have him talk about food and more about his body or dealing with detox. I go upstairs. Feel sad and depressed, since I feel like acting as if he is attractive is lying and angry because I would like to feel safe instead like my body is a liability. I would like to have simple clear words for this.I think about some friends, and I worry about them at protests or that I can't talk to them about my problems because it has been dismissed in the past and now is definately not the time. I do not want to stop their momentum.I need to go for a walk but I want to sleep.
(DIR) Post #ADOLrO281ruU4de8Zs by angryandignored@spinster.xyz
2020-06-07T22:05:22.102Z
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I have spent so long trying to move past sexual violence, I have denied it, I have fallen back into depression while seeking support and justice from it and I do not to know what to do. I have gone tk counselling.I sometimes tell myself that if I could just lose it and be violent to the worst attackers, I could live in less fear. I have had oppertunity but all I wanted was them to not hurt me, to not hurt others, to not get away with it and be able to lie to themselves. I just wanted respect and understanding.Is that sort of impulse socialised into and out of people?I want a break from the experience gap that men have towards women. I understand when groups are different the desire to be understood and not dragged down is the same.I want energy to help people fight for specific things and to learn without retreating into my own mind to escape. I start on difficult topics and I feel shitty not being able to stand up for myself, for being with someone who did not care for me but for what he could get.I wrote some stuff I need to send, maybe it will help politically. I can go for a walk to the post office.
(DIR) Post #ADOLrOUqJ6sXVh54Km by HellaDea@spinster.xyz
2020-06-07T22:33:45.053Z
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@angryandignored i feel like feminism needs its own grief system... I think this bc as girls we grow up believing males are great. And in the end we find out that everything we learned aout males is false. Its like losing a best friend. When you love someone and they do something horrible to you its hard to not be shocked or saddened.
(DIR) Post #ADOLrP1oKXFZ9wVOim by FrustratedTherapist@spinster.xyz
2021-11-14T12:08:44.120612Z
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I've also been thinking about this lately--the grief process when we lose our illusions about others. Having our perceptions shattered can feel heartbreaking and brain-breaking. I think at least some of it has to do with the fact that our self-concept is tied up with our worldview and when one of those starts to change, we must adjust the other. The more rigid our worldview, the more shocking and painful it may be to have it shattered. Viewing this as a grief process sheds light on the anger and denial we may encounter when confronted with the reality of male patterns of behavior. I think it's also useful to view it this way because we know there's no way around grief but through it.And think about how we support ourselves and each other in grief. @Eleutheromaniac @HellaDea
(DIR) Post #ADOLrPYmLxcaoBvj6m by Eleutheromaniac@spinster.xyz
2021-11-14T12:33:13.658423Z
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@FrustratedTherapist @HellaDea I think this is very true.I’ve been going back to the stereotype of “the angry feminist” for a while now and I don’t often see a broader context or rationale for it. Not just why are we angry, not just an incident or a pattern of behaviour but a searing grief that everything we thought we knew was a lie. It’s absolutely grief and heartbreak. There is a pattern and a cycle to it. It’s deep. It’s sometimes the sort of deep that you feel and can’t find words to describe.I think this is a really important idea. I would love for you to write more about this.