Post AAS2T7End3FVyiTvto by Nagaraja@spinster.xyz
(DIR) More posts by Nagaraja@spinster.xyz
(DIR) Post #AAQrzTHVuebuxV17vE by Jar@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T00:10:13.735192Z
1 likes, 3 repeats
Recommendations: lesbian books/resources for young people? Hi I’m new here and hoping for some advice. My cousin is attracted to girls and I would like to get her some books or resources she can relate to. She is 14 years old and likes fantasy/adventure but dislikes excessive violence. She has been taught gender theory in school & supports it, so if possible the media would affirm same sex attraction without mentioning trans issues.I wish I could talk to her directly about the lgbtq++ community and the manipulation that’s going on because she is planning to join clubs/groups and I don’t want her to be shamed for who she is naturally attracted to. It’s horrifying to see conversion therapy rhetoric coming from the very community that should be fighting for her. She has a supportive family and is accepting of herself and is excited to join lgbt groups now that she’s out, but I’m afraid she won’t find what she’s hoping for.For now, I’m hoping that relatable books, media, or resources could help if anyone has suggestions.Thank you!
(DIR) Post #AAQupf2fdFaSOs5WPw by BCLADY@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T00:43:05.347102Z
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@Jar I WISH I COULD POST THIS ON OVARIT. EVERYTHING I CAN THINK OF ONLY HAS QUEER THEORY WITH LESBIANS OR IS NOT APROPRIET FOR A 14 YEAR OLD.
(DIR) Post #AAQwnok6nJ4robee1I by LuvGreenTea2019@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T01:05:10.004722Z
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@Jar Keep her away from the trans and queer controlled LGBTQIA. Just let her be a 14 year old girl. Get her involved in different hobbies or sports. Help her with her school work. Don't let her spend too much time on the internet, especially trans sites because they will try to convince her to get a mastectomy and take testosterone. Never forget to tell her she is strong and beautiful just the way she is. When she gets older introduce her to the LGB Alliance or LGB Fight Back. https://twitter.com/LGBAlliance_USAhttps://twitter.com/lgbfightbackGood books for parents, "Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters" by Abigail Shrierhttps://www.amazon.com/Irreversible-Damage-Transgender-Seducing-Daughters/dp/1684510317"Trans: When Ideology Meets Reality" by Helen Joycehttps://www.amazon.com/Trans-When-Ideology-Meets-Reality-ebook/dp/B08XQYMWVQ/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=Helen+Joyce&qid=1629248038&s=digital-text&sr=1-1Groups for parents,4th Wave Nowhttps://twitter.com/4th_WaveNowParents of ROGD Kidshttps://www.parentsofrogdkids.com/Good video,Dysphoric: A Four-Part Documentary Series (4 part series) youtubehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8taOdnXD6o&t=1370sDr. Lisa Littman's research,https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0202330Sweden bans GnRH analogues for teenagers under age 16.https://segm.org/sites/default/files/Karolinska%20Policy%20Change%20K2021-3343%20March%202021%20%28English%2C%20unofficial%20translation%29.pdfFinland recently changed its policy on medically transitioning kids, and there is the Kiera Bell case in England.
(DIR) Post #AAQxniB3IvVZPIlqE4 by LuvGreenTea2019@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T01:16:20.757558Z
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@Jar "I wish I could talk to her directly about the lgbtq++ community and the manipulation that’s going on because she is planning to join clubs/groups and I don’t want her to be shamed for who she is naturally attracted to."Do you have any idea what is going on the "LGBTQIA"? It's a toxic horror show for young lesbians. Read this, and keep in mind that this is just scratching the surface. https://www.gettheloutuk.com/blog/category/research/lesbians-at-ground-zero.htmlI'm a lesbian, and I know if transwoman pulls a Dana Rivers on me, it's not even going to make the news at the LGBTQ media. Transwomen can slaughter lesbian families in their own home in the middle of the night, and there won't be one word from the trans controlled LGBTQ.Don't let any 14 year old girl anywhere near the LGBTQ. Check out the LGB Alliance instead. Notice no "T" on the end.
(DIR) Post #AAR2hAWW0zct45Vdia by Jar@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T01:55:28.765274Z
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@LuvGreenTea2019 thank you for this article, I haven’t seen it before. I recently woke up to some of what was going on thanks to LGBdroptheT, newthoughtcrime.com, and a site I won’t name. I have knowledge of ‘cotton ceiling’, incel->trans, agp, and the trend of calling lesbians bigots for their boundaries which is why I’m so concerned. Sadly, she does not know of these things and has a positive view of the transgender movement due to school. I’ve been trying to slowly bring things up with her but you’re right, it seems to go very deep. I’m scared for her and other young lesbian/gay people. For now, I’m trying to help build up her boundries, find positive representation, and slowly broach the topic. I’m not lesbian myself (unsure of orientation) but I will be trying to support lesbian groups/rights if possible.
(DIR) Post #AAR8ESuBC18TOyH4Yy by Tiggy@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T01:14:17.655183Z
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@LuvGreenTea2019 @Jar this so much. Growing up the internet was new and my parents didn't have much of a hold on me and my internet usage. As a kid I would have felt a bit upset but I wish that we had known more about it when I was growing up. I was groomed by furries and queer Tumblr alike as a kid and my parents had no idea. They never talked to me about it either. I don't have children. But I had wished my parents didn't judge so harshly ( which I'm happy to see that you seem to be doing fine in regards to her sexuality) . Keep an open and honest discussion. I wish I could be of more help, but I fell into the trans bullshit and lived as a trans man for a year and some. I don't know if I would have fallen into it if my mom was more involved in what my life was like as a teenager.
(DIR) Post #AAR8ETMtTG6Wq1i0Js by Jar@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T03:04:13.586184Z
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@Tiggy Sadly it seems easy to fall into these groups online where there’s a promise of acceptance +happiness. I don’t think it’s the fault of any young person though, the adults who do “egg cracking” and things like that are responsible. I think there should be more safety features for kids on the internet.
(DIR) Post #AAR8ETnTsPN6AU9ElE by Tiggy@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T03:11:21.421175Z
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@Jar I don't fault my mom very much. She had flaws but we all do. The internet was just a new beast and they tried their best to monitor me. I was given unmonitored access around the age of 15 and I believe that's too young, especially depending on the kid. We all got into dumb shit as teens, the internet just opens up many more possibilities. I was very damaged from my childhood and I fell into 4chan first which exposed me to real life gore images, extreme pornography and all kinds of depravity. My parents had NO CLUE. and I'm sure if they had known they would have taken everything from me. And honestly, that would be the only option. I slipped away from that stuff and fell into the queer cult which was , less graphically violent, but insidious in it's own way. Its hard for parents, it really is. This stuff is accessable from pretty much anywhere. I know if I was closer to my own mom I probably wouldn't have fallen into it. We need to have close relationships with our children and sisters. I think that's the only way we can successfully warn them of the dangers without them distrusting us and falling to the sweet lies.
(DIR) Post #AARAZxM3NQxTpSghIe by FSI@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T03:23:15.277463Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@Jar Fourteen year old girls are usually pretty smart, I wouldn't underestimate how helpful it could be to her to point out some of the informative links on these issues, no need to wait till she's older imo.Here's a link to an interview with a 15 year old lesbian who talks with Sasha White - this might be a good starting point. https://youtu.be/UKtzrqS-XTQAnd here's an interview with a young lesbian writer of fiction, I haven't read her work so I have no idea if it's good but the writer herself is awesome in the interview https://youtu.be/uWuySuNbSiII'd also suggest checking out LGB Ailiance and asking them for recommendations on books. They might be a really good resource. https://youtube.com/c/LGBAlliance
(DIR) Post #AARVj3o0rNELTowpU0 by Mazikeen@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T01:33:28.525390Z
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@Jar My favourite book about young lesbians is probably "Girl Mans Up" by M.E. Girard. It's about a young butch in the suburbs of Toronto, pretty typical high school book. It touches on things like compulsory heterosexuality, coming into butchness, standing up for yourself, and dealing with family opinions about being a lesbian. It's recent-ish but no mention of the trans BS (though people have tried to make it about that I'm sure). Probably one of the most relatable things I've ever read.
(DIR) Post #AARVj4PabfHvMMWq3M by Nagaraja@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T07:36:28.622831Z
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@Mazikeen @Jar Just looked it up and the first summary I found is this"Girl Mans Up (2016), a young adult LGBT contemporary novel by M-E Girard, follows a protagonist grappling with gender identity issues, and what it means to be a boy, a girl, or genderqueer."We really can't have anything nice, can we
(DIR) Post #AARt4PR1w4PJaaLZ8i by Chronic-Yonic@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T00:54:05.700392Z
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@Jar what type of books are you thinking of? Romance? Theory? Radfem material? And I don't lump the Alphabet soup gang with the LGB, we have absolutely nothing in common. Queer is a slur for us LGB and the T is into the Cotton Ceiling for young lesbians.
(DIR) Post #AARt4Q7ZNuR1iWFXRg by Jar@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T02:26:57.881073Z
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@Chronic-Yonic She doesn’t really like romance books but I wonder if that’s because they are mostly heterosexual. If there are books that have lesbian characters or relationships that a 14 year old would relate to I think that would be good. Something like fantasy/quests/adventure are things she likes. They’re always adding relationships into those books and she complains about it, but if it was lgb instead I think that would be great for her.As for radfem/theory I’m very new to it but I’ve been lurking on radfam places like r/fourthwave to try to be more familiar with it. I wouldn’t call myself radfem because I respect that there will be certain beliefs and if I don’t know them yet, well, how could I consider myself one? I am interested in learning if you have beginner reading/or if there are some you think she would benefit reading.Also, I’m sorry about including lgbtq, acronym, it is unfair that same sex attraction is shoved in with everyone else but sadly that acronym is the name of groups that are prominent online and in school that she would join. I support lgb groups being separate+not using slurs to describe a community harmed by them.
(DIR) Post #AARt4Qj98CUbb3pY12 by Chronic-Yonic@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T10:23:45.001214Z
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@Jar Sorry, it's ok, I get a bit prickly when the T and the rest of the alphabet gets lumped in with the LGB, I've had chats on Tumblr with young lesbians who were victimized by the Cotton Ceiling, it's so horrific, it's rape mixed in with conversion therapy rhetoric, it really is, I've seen what damage the T does. We'll never push back soon enough those fetishists, because it's a lesbian fetish they have. Surely comes from porn but anyway...So I'm not sure if the girl can read feminist theory by your answer. Is she interested in what I call *drier* material?I had given a list to @GrumpyOldNurse I didn't keep it, unfortunately. I've just found parts of it. • Annie on my mind by Nancy Garden (haven't read it)• Rubyfruit Jungle by Rita Mae Brown (although I read this decades ago, I can't clearly recall it but someone said the main character is bisexual so she does have relationships with a few guys, it seems)• Green Fried Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe by Fannie Flagg• When the Stars Sang by Caren J. Werlinger (it was recommended to me but haven't started it yet)• The Stars Are Legion by Kameron Hurley (SciFi, was recommended to me but haven't read it yet)• Shattered by Lee Winter (SciFi, I've got it, not read yet, the author writes very very well, I've read a lot of her books, but if this book is the same as the ones I've read, there might be racy parts)• The Kate Martinelli series by Laurie R. King (crime novels - Martinelli is a detective and it's really well written although the last two books in the series, I don't know why but I have a feeling the relationship with her wife is headed for an end...) I do hope other sisters in here have more suggestions. I'll ask on Tumblr see what comes up and will report back if I get replies.
(DIR) Post #AARt4RF3Da0tC0l1kG by GrumpyOldNurse@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T11:58:02.671945Z
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@Chronic-Yonic @Jar my apologies, Mac, but I passed the list on to my daughter, and don't have it anymore. She read some of them, but you know how teens are when parents make suggestions.(Jar, I reached out to Spinster when my daughter came out last year, and Spinster was very supportive)
(DIR) Post #AARuPRyhm8CBVnh9Lk by Chronic-Yonic@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T12:05:31.568547Z
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@GrumpyOldNurse @Jar Oh it's ok, babe! :blobheartcat: Did she like any books in the list? What were her objections? Curious...
(DIR) Post #AARuPTIarfhNbm0XzM by GrumpyOldNurse@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T12:13:03.201072Z
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@Chronic-Yonic @Jar her only objection was the source of the list. I hear "OK, mom" a lot, but it's the way she says it. 😂I've bookmarked it now that you've been gracious enough to repost it, and I'll try to revisit.
(DIR) Post #AAS0KNPBwtRLbg31UG by BCLADY@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T13:19:21.992184Z
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@Jar OK I THOUGHT OF SOME:AVATAR THE LAST AIRBENDER (KID FRENDLY NO LESBIANS IN IT BUT AN AMAZING FANTASY WORLD)WHICH BUILDS UP TO...THE LEGEND OF KORRA! (ENDS WITH A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP! NOTHING IS WOKE! THE FIRST SEASON IS A LITTLE QUICK BUT THE WRITERS DIDN'T REALIZE THEY'D GET A WHOLE COUPLE OF SEASONS OUT OF IT.)STAR VS THE FORCES OF EVIL (ONE OF THE MAIN PROTAGONISTS ENDS UP WITH A WOMAN LOVER, NOTHING WOKE, ALTHOUGH IT DOES CENTER ON A HET RELATIONSHIP.OLD SCHOOL ADVENTURE TIME CAN BE GOOD (IN THE LATER SEASONS PRINCESS BUBBLEGUM AND MARCELINE ARE A COUPLE, ALSO IN HBO SPECIALS OF IT SOLIDIFY THEIR REALTIONSHIPS)HONESTLY, I WOULD TALK TO HER ABOUT HOW MANIPULATIVE PEOPLE CAN BE ONLINE AND EXPLAIN THAT PORN IS SET UP TO CHANNEL A LOT OF PEOPLE INTO DISFUNCTIONAL AND ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS. I WOULD TELL HER TO BE MINDFUL OF ALL THE STUFF WHEN HER FRIENDS ARE TALKING ABOUT ANYTHING WITH SEX. SOMETIMES PEOPLE SEE SOMETHING ONLINE AND THEY ASSUME IT'S POPULAR OR ACTUALLY HAPPENING (EVEN PARENTS DO THIS) BUT THE REALITY IS PEOPLE TRY TO DO THINGS TO MAKE THEMSELVES FEEL IMPORTANT AND THAT INCLUDES MAKING UP EXAGGERATED STORIES. I WOULD MAYBE GO THROUGH THE MEDIA SHE CURRENTLY INGESTS AND ASK HER IF SHE KNOWS WHO OWNS THE MEDIA SHE LIKES (ARE THE PRODUCERS MALE OR FEMALE, WHERE THEY UPPER CLASS OR LOWER CLASS) AND TALK ABOUT HOW THINGS ARE MORE THAN JUST THE WRITERS AND ACTORS. THERE'S BIG MONEY THAT GOES INTO THIS STUFF. ASKING WHERE IT CAME FROM AND WHY IT'S BEING INVESTED IS IMPORTANT. I WOULD WATCH TUCA AND BERTIE WITH HER WHEN SHE WAS A BIT OLDER. OF COURSE IF SHE ISN'T THE TYPE OF PERSON TO LIKE CARTOONS, THEN ALL THE SHOWS I RECOMMENDED WILL NOT HELP.I WOULD STILL RECOMMEND THE LEGEND OF KORRA THOUGH. I KEEP TELLING MYSELF TO GO BACK AND WATCH "DARIA," I FEEL LIKE THERE MIGHT BE SOME LESBIAN STUFF IN THERE, BUT I'M NOT ENTIRELY SURE.
(DIR) Post #AAS2EYtKWy7hOvV3Cq by Mazikeen@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T13:18:24.586218Z
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@Nagaraja @Jar Wow that really pisses me off, that's so not what I got from the book. I'm pretty sure that the main character never even mentions gender, she's really confident that she's a woman. It should say that she's grappling with what it means to be a butch lesbian. Ffs.
(DIR) Post #AAS2T7End3FVyiTvto by Nagaraja@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T13:43:21.584024Z
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@Mazikeen @Jar Yeah, I started reading it and she even gets asked directly multiple times if she wants to be a boy, and even if she might be trans, and always (so far) is very sure that she's not, she's butch. Also I was expecting it to be just a fun YA adventure, but damn some of it really hurts.
(DIR) Post #AAS8jBcRhqC9vQaY7c by Mazikeen@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T13:54:25.549448Z
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@Nagaraja @Jar Yeah it can be pretty real sometimes, I just found it so relatable that I couldn't not recommend it.
(DIR) Post #AAS8jC8LnDiRWNW1qq by Nagaraja@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T14:53:29.559128Z
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@Mazikeen @Jar Yeah so far it's a weird mixture of really really relatable and being what might have happened if I'd escaped wanting so desperately to be feminine that I thought I genuinely was. And obviously looking 100% straight until I was 22 saved me from a whole lot of shit, but I do also wish I'd had a bit longer to come to terms with it, or that I'd ever been cool enough to do what I never even realised I wanted. I so respect the butch women who have always just been themselves.
(DIR) Post #AASJAJu60k6UypQAxk by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T15:42:52.803508Z
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@Nagaraja @Mazikeen @Jar frustrating that it will put people off and they’ll miss out on a book they would have enjoyed.
(DIR) Post #AAT4WXQR78vV8Je13I by Chronic-Yonic@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T12:14:52.891981Z
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@GrumpyOldNurse @Jar No worries, hun
(DIR) Post #AAT4gGauXwb5pQBOb2 by Chronic-Yonic@spinster.xyz
2021-08-18T10:33:29.769556Z
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@Jar Oh and also The Bermudez Triangle by Maureen Johnson (did not read this, it was recommended to me by women on Ovarit when I asked the same question for @GrumpyOldNurse 's 14-year old
(DIR) Post #AAsEE770DiMbMATJxo by Eleutheromaniac@spinster.xyz
2021-08-30T16:23:54.514571Z
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@Chronic-Yonic @Jar @GrumpyOldNurse Oranges are not the only fruit? I know Jeanette Winterson’s on the trans-wagon now but this was one of those “life will never be the same after reading this” books back in the day.
(DIR) Post #AAsEFJjAnirklytqjY by AnneBevan@spinster.xyz
2021-08-30T18:28:49.205263Z
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@Eleutheromaniac @Chronic-Yonic @GrumpyOldNurse @Jar Another great and quite recent book by Winterson is “The Daylight Gate” about women in Lancashire accused of witchcraft. Hard to understand how the woman who wrote that could believe in gender identity.
(DIR) Post #AAsEFhHLEqrboc3xgW by Eleutheromaniac@spinster.xyz
2021-08-30T18:34:02.308832Z
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@AnneBevan @Chronic-Yonic @GrumpyOldNurse @Jar I haven’t read that one yet.I’m exactly the same- absolutely blows my mind that she’s come down on that side of things all things considered but I live in hope she’s just doing the be nice and try to avoid being cancelled thing 😬