Post 9ldyDN7COSJxgn2pLU by 361.xj9@social.sunshinegardens.org
(DIR) More posts by 361.xj9@social.sunshinegardens.org
(DIR) Post #9lbulYO28b43WV2w64 by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T13:21:36.456287Z
0 likes, 2 repeats
Attention all trans people!For scientific purposes I’m making a poll for you all, if you’re cis, please just answer “see results”!Did you ever mention about your trans experience to other people when you were young (below 12 or so)?boosts highly appreciated
(DIR) Post #9lbv7KQAk2vCa4QhrE by lesbianhacker@radical.town
2019-08-06T13:25:16Z
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@teascade I'm saying no but also I don't even know what counts, lie, I remember having my mom paint my fingernails as a young child, but I don't think that quite counts
(DIR) Post #9lbv8PzFX9n48GMAKm by coda@beach.city
2019-08-06T13:25:39Z
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@teascade I voted no, because I didn’t know I was trans until I was in my 20’s.
(DIR) Post #9lbvFbRfKXvphG4duK by dragon@lesbian.solutions
2019-08-06T13:26:52Z
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@teascade I didn't know I was trans or that it was a possibility
(DIR) Post #9lbvHGDjDMz4RrLSz2 by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T13:27:22.198908Z
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@lesbianhacker I mean if you didn’t say anything about your feelings about gender or anything, I don’t think it counts.
(DIR) Post #9lbvUMKXoEudA8mNLE by laurie@hellsite.site
2019-08-06T13:29:29Z
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@teascade i mean, i didn't *know* i was trans at the time, and was embarrassed to tell people that i played with my sisters toys (only after being teased by her when she found out) so yea i kinda bottled it up
(DIR) Post #9lbvZfxaFoctUUZhMu by julia@efdn.club
2019-08-06T13:30:33Z
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@teascade No, because I didn't resize I was trans at 12
(DIR) Post #9lbvbKpJnYDQWgV3Hk by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T13:30:59.726426Z
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@laurie Sounds very similar to my experiences. I felt that something was wrong with me, and often I enjoyed the idea that I wanted to be a girl, but didn’t know that was a thing. I would have voted for “yes, but only to other young people”, because I only told my brother, who was 5 years older than me, and nobody else
(DIR) Post #9lbvbtUcuTSc2e5WOO by anna@witches.live
2019-08-06T13:30:46Z
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@teascade only really w/ people i know well. certainly never with young kids because i dont talk with them anyway lol
(DIR) Post #9lbvc078IDpKZo9MFE by anarchiv@todon.nl
2019-08-06T13:30:54Z
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@teascade no because I thought it was just some sort of weird neurosis
(DIR) Post #9lbviHZcIAkSSnT69I by LargeNovelty@lgbtq.cool
2019-08-06T13:32:07Z
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@teascade voted no, I didn't start vocalizing stuff like that until I was in high school
(DIR) Post #9lbvrrYlrh14gBdoIa by julia@efdn.club
2019-08-06T13:33:48Z
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@teascade *realize, lol
(DIR) Post #9lbwJVw5r66Jirjdc8 by sireffe@iam.lydi.as
2019-08-06T13:38:51Z
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@teascade no, because i didn’t really have the language to express it and i was already terrified of expressing interest in anything girly for fear of other people’s reactions
(DIR) Post #9lbwNJ0TrsF8mWaxZw by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T13:39:40.070078Z
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@sireffe Very similar to my experiences! Although I did tell to my brother when I was around 5, and he was 10. He just replied “what the fuck” and I never spoke of it for 10 years afterwards haha.
(DIR) Post #9lbwNn7btvluBKA4rA by jennie@witches.live
2019-08-06T13:39:28Z
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@teascade I have scattered memories of "hmmmm" moments from when I was young, but nothing I ever picked up on enough to talk to anyone about. First time I really asked myself "what if...?" was probably high school, and like some other folks I buried those feelings deep for a surreally long time
(DIR) Post #9lby339PJJAJioEuTg by robinsyl@vulpine.club
2019-08-06T13:58:16Z
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@teascade I didn't quite understand these feelings well enough to tell anyone, not even myself.
(DIR) Post #9lbzW88xvTA1YiSnI0 by erosdiscordia@radical.town
2019-08-06T14:14:42Z
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@teascade No, because I didn't know I was trans, or that that was the reason for my crappy gender feelings.
(DIR) Post #9lbzeE7Dbg2iOfVUGG by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T14:16:19.876951Z
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@erosdiscordia I think it's very rare for a young trans person to know about these things, and that's kind of where the problem lies. Many many of us have had very similar experiences though, and just lived our childhoods with confusion and embarrassment :blob_pat:
(DIR) Post #9lbzt7WeODogIpVKXw by erosdiscordia@radical.town
2019-08-06T14:18:51Z
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@teascade I agree! So many of us shared this!I'm working my way up to sharing about my early gender feelings. They're a Whole Thing, and kinda problematic, so it's nerve wracking.
(DIR) Post #9lbzyDXzQeeKQUYrVQ by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T14:19:57.198023Z
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@erosdiscordia :blob_hug: Hang in there! It will get better and easier over time
(DIR) Post #9lc0BCHrQR44HaCqcy by velexiraptor@witches.live
2019-08-06T14:22:09Z
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@teascade by then i already "knew" i wasn't supposed to feel the way i did, and got really good at keeping it a secret for a decade
(DIR) Post #9lc0YZ96bS21q2FoeW by minus_zero@girlcock.club
2019-08-06T14:26:19Z
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@teascade i didn't know i was trans or that it was possible to be trans. but i vaguely remember having some sort of trans feelings but i never really told anyone because i was worried people would think i was weird.
(DIR) Post #9lc1ja4habNDrK0inI by erosdiscordia@radical.town
2019-08-06T14:39:38Z
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@teascade Thank you kindly. 💜💙
(DIR) Post #9lc2KBxQDiLPm63xbM by RadiantEmber@weirder.earth
2019-08-06T14:45:46Z
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@teascade I answered no, but like it kinda depends on what you mean by that.I always hated pink and other "girly" things, but I also wasn't into "boy" things either. I just really hated being placed in a box and I tried to expand that box as much as possible.Whenever people made binary claims like "boys like this, girls like that" I argued against it and it upset me. But I had no idea it was possible to reject the binary completely, so I didn't talk about that
(DIR) Post #9lc2Ro1J6PuFqpVjBg by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T14:47:42.078644Z
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@RadiantEmber I think that's fine! As long as you didn't really mention to people how you felt about wanting to be something else than a "boy" or a "girl to others, I think it falls into "no" category
(DIR) Post #9lc46fgb5p2JpYsFOa by moth@queer.garden
2019-08-06T14:55:06Z
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@teascade No, and largely because I was unaware. I had an affinity for girls when I was younger, but largely I was a very gendervoid art child until I started college and figured out that exploring was an option.
(DIR) Post #9lc48XM32XWYZQ9TTE by yam655@sonomu.club
2019-08-06T15:03:46Z
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@teascade I think my youngest was three when he was having a bath and, struggling for the words, told his mother and me that he wished he had a vulva like his sister.We need trans and nonbinary literature that's age appropriate and aimed at kids.My ex and I didn't shove the kids in to closets. One is "both" and the other is "neither" and how that falls out as they age is up to them. As fewer parents put kids in to closets, the demand for kids books increases.@erosdiscordia
(DIR) Post #9lc4PKzkFKp19zjNNA by turtlebirb@radical.town
2019-08-06T15:09:32Z
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@teascade nope, because I didn't have any conception that transition was a thing you could do.
(DIR) Post #9lc5an9nyomBdxSiJ6 by amber@lgbtq.cool
2019-08-06T15:21:56Z
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@teascade i'm saying no here, but i honestly don't remember because a lot of my early memories are missing due to PTSD. As far as I can remember, it was obvious really early to me it was just another thing that would be "wrong" with me though.
(DIR) Post #9lc6WYdk71UVPo0gdc by morganmay@octodon.social
2019-08-06T15:33:07Z
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@teascade I had a lot of confusion and unhappiness around gender norms, and I definitely communicated that to my parents and peers, but it was never anything as clear as "I wish I was a girl." Would that be a yes or a no?
(DIR) Post #9lc6ZkmnPUNfxDliEq by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T15:33:58.021281Z
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@morganmay Hmm. Depends on what you said? For example I said to my brother at around age 5 that "i felt girly some times" and I would qualify that as "Yes, but only to other young people"
(DIR) Post #9lc6aiap38SDRSczuC by Sylvhem@eldritch.cafe
2019-08-06T15:34:00Z
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@teascade No, because I wasn't trans at the time.
(DIR) Post #9lc6kGnNFsFa7p3Ney by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T15:35:51.185601Z
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@Sylvhem Huh, I did not think of that. I should've probably made that a separate option. You're still very valid! :blob_pat:
(DIR) Post #9lc71j0DdPQkWzNuts by Sylvhem@eldritch.cafe
2019-08-06T15:38:56Z
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@teascade Don't worry :).
(DIR) Post #9lc7zF9LktGfJs2JQu by Pyretta@afterlife.masto.host
2019-08-06T15:49:36Z
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@teascade No, because my parents told me that feeling of wanting to be a girl meant I was crazy and stuffed me back in the closet by threatening to have me institutionalised.
(DIR) Post #9lc89P4rhQ110OmcuO by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T15:51:36.346566Z
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@Pyretta I hope you’re in a better place now! That was definitely a very real fear for me too when I was younger, and that’s why I didn’t tell my parents until I was 18 and already moved away.
(DIR) Post #9lc8JDQVs6avlbaV3w by Pyretta@afterlife.masto.host
2019-08-06T15:52:15Z
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@teascade I was maybe 7 when that happened. I still live with my parents but they've changed a lot and i'm planning to move out soon anyway.
(DIR) Post #9lcAPPenVoGJLQLt0C by g@cybre.space
2019-08-06T15:57:26Z
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@teascade i didn't realise till i was 29, so, 🤷
(DIR) Post #9lcAPVtCLBLWfp8THU by jakuraisu@mastodon.art
2019-08-06T15:56:42Z
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@teascade i repressed for a LONG time, until a few years ago, since a family member who i was close to was. pretty openly a terf. i still haven't come out to most of my family because of them ajdks
(DIR) Post #9lcAQ6PMZ4Svw0SfPk by CaptainBragd@mastodon.art
2019-08-06T16:03:31Z
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@teascade I didnt really have the language to express my experiences as a nonbinary person untill my mid twenties. I thought maybe I was a woman from 17 and on, but when i found out being agender was a thing it clicked like "OH HEY THATS ME!" So yeah, I couldnt really Do that as a kid
(DIR) Post #9lcAQf7VVRylalNOwS by CreamyKnife@mastodon.art
2019-08-06T16:06:10Z
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@teascade Yep. I have been since I grasped the concept of gender at 7. I used to think I was gonna 'evolve' pokemon style into a full on dude when I got older, but day before/after (I forget which) my 7th bday, I realized that's not exactly how the world works.I was extremely open abt it, but I've been pretty strange from the get go, so folks ignored it for the most part tbh.At least I think aha, I used to have 0 understanding of how the world around me was affected by my dumbness
(DIR) Post #9lcAeGztzTNypaJFGS by hoppet@glaceon.social
2019-08-06T16:19:30Z
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@teascade I voted no, because I was super emotionally repressed until my early 20s. I can look back now and identify feelings of wanting to be a girl at that young, but at the time I ignored those feelings. Most of that was probably due growing up with an abusive father.
(DIR) Post #9lcB65A7aRvmEWLkXo by ky0ko@cybre.space
2019-08-06T16:20:12Z
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@teascade i knew what was up when i was 8, but i was too scared about, well, everything, to say anything to my parents, and i also didn't know that transitioning could be a thingi did later learn about intersex and wondered if i was that, and then learned about medical transition at maybe age 11 or 12, but still was too scared to bring it up for social pressures and fear that i would never pass as a girl
(DIR) Post #9lcB66YcOr7WYmopMm by ky0ko@cybre.space
2019-08-06T16:24:24Z
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@teascade if there had been better information available to me, i probably would have brought this up with my parents and figured out what we could do, but the best resources for knowledge i had were... frankly just not promising to me and generally targeted at much older trans women
(DIR) Post #9lcBWm8aQd4j31MOQK by ky0ko@cybre.space
2019-08-06T16:29:10Z
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@teascade if i were the same age today and could easily find other resources on the internet than the "susans place" forums (which were literally the only community i could find 12 years ago or so) and, well, pornsites, i'd probably have gotten much more of a head start on things
(DIR) Post #9lcCUTFzkr4RrkI4Ia by zephasaurus_hex@booktoot.club
2019-08-06T16:37:27Z
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@teascade I didn't know...it was an option, I guess? My parents are very homophobic & transphobic and really just different-phobic. I secretly read and watched all the queer stuff I could get my hands on, but it wasn't much and I didn't see any other trans masc people till much later. So I thought it was probably just a common lesbian thing, like of *course* I didn't feel like I belonged with *straight* girls but once I found other queer ones I'd fit, right? Nah.
(DIR) Post #9lcCztgFYxXWnHYXfk by DylTheFunkyHomosexual@radical.town
2019-08-06T16:45:38Z
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@teascade I found out I was trans when I was 17, and by then I knew that it would cause a shitstorm so I don’t talk about it at all to them
(DIR) Post #9lcDuxmH0CZk0VaJG4 by null@pl.devfs.xyz
2019-08-06T16:56:13.930793Z
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@teascade uhhhhh nope i couldn't do that until i was like 21 lmao
(DIR) Post #9lcDypPY3D09DWnY9o by null@pl.devfs.xyz
2019-08-06T16:56:56.175847Z
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@teascade i hadn't really figured it out until then anyway...
(DIR) Post #9lcFj9ZLXHMv0l2CqO by AKAHayling@elekk.xyz
2019-08-06T17:16:19Z
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@teascade Grew up in the Southern US, where I wasn't made aware that Trans was a thing you could be until I discovered some porn when I was like, 19. Not that I wasn't aware I felt different, I just didn't have the vocabulary to pin down the problem.
(DIR) Post #9lcFpGZ6RBMwRkpraC by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T17:17:36.443600Z
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@AKAHayling Yep. Very similar to me, except I knew about the porn already when I was around 12, but had the idea that "those are just freaks" etc. Didn't find out about transgender being a thing until I was around 15
(DIR) Post #9lcHFgpHWRcRNQZBtQ by AKAHayling@elekk.xyz
2019-08-06T17:31:42Z
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@teascade It's a Very Strong argument for why representation is important. Had I known there was a construction for what I felt, I could have been dealing with my parents disappointment WAY earlier and be over it by now. XD
(DIR) Post #9lcHJ6tt2FGl76LrVI by teascade@cybergay.space
2019-08-06T17:34:12.802567Z
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@AKAHayling Me irl. And maybe I could've stopped my male puberty from ever happening and I might have lived a much happier life overall.
(DIR) Post #9lcJhhlbolqqJMKqBc by UnclearFuture@mastodon.starrevolution.org
2019-08-06T18:00:01Z
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@teascadeI didn't realise I was trans until way into my adulthood.
(DIR) Post #9ldyDN7COSJxgn2pLU by 361.xj9@social.sunshinegardens.org
2019-08-07T13:09:42.290274Z
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@teascade dissociation is a bitch. it took me a really long time to break out of it enough to see what was happening