[HN Gopher] You Are Not Lazy or Undisciplined. You Have Internal...
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       You Are Not Lazy or Undisciplined. You Have Internal Resistance
        
       Author : gala8y
       Score  : 152 points
       Date   : 2021-08-01 14:07 UTC (8 hours ago)
        
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 (TXT) w3m dump (medium.com)
        
       | bserge wrote:
       | I've read sooooooo much of this kind of shiitake, I am sick of
       | it. It is bullshit. Or rather, it's written by people who don't
       | even take into account the biological nature of the brain.
       | 
       | Let me check... _of course_ he 's a "coach"... If you can't do,
       | teach, I guess.
       | 
       | All of this shit will act as a bandaid, a crutch at best. It's
       | like the bullshit "imagine you're wealthy and you will become
       | wealthy".
       | 
       | No, that doesn't work. Nor does praying to God, nor anything that
       | doesn't entail actual action. You can imagine whatever the fork
       | you want, it won't make it real.
       | 
       | Fortunately, people smarter than me and all of these self help
       | coaches and theorycrafters have already started figuring out how
       | to fix this problem _for real_ , by applying real science to the
       | very real bio computer in our skulls.
       | 
       | It's still a young science, with parts of the same core problem
       | being labeled ADD, OCD, anxiety, depression. But there are real
       | drugs that _actually_ work.
       | 
       | The biggest roadblock is getting this accepted as a treatable
       | condition by the mainstream medicine systems. They're still in
       | the dark ages and treat it like they treat death - as inevitable,
       | unfixable.
       | 
       | Some people are already benefitting from it while the majority is
       | laughing at them and calling the unfortunate ones who don't have
       | access to good doctors and good medicine lazy.
       | 
       | I hope one day humans look back at it and laugh at how
       | ridiculously stupid their ancestors were.
        
         | SubiculumCode wrote:
         | Yes biology matters the most, but most of the time we don't
         | have any control of the biological processes, and science does
         | not own enough to do anything about it in this life. So we are
         | left with: Talk, crutches, bandaids, frameworks, meta-knowledge
         | of one's thought patterns, belief systems. Sure they are silly
         | and full of contradictions, but funnily enough: All these
         | things matter to biology. Not only do deeply held beliefs alter
         | what biological organism does (I mean it moves some bodies
         | attend services, right?), but it can also alter thought
         | patterns and mental habits.
        
         | hypertele-Xii wrote:
         | > You can imagine whatever the fork you want, it won't make it
         | real.
         | 
         | Yet you also cannot make real something you didn't imagine,
         | except by accident. _Priming_ works, hence  "fake it till you
         | make it".
        
         | the-dude wrote:
         | So what happened with all these people in the dark ages?
        
           | tonyedgecombe wrote:
           | They couldn't do office work.
        
       | Xophmeister wrote:
       | I might just being dense or, perhaps more generously, completely
       | un-self-aware, but I genuinely don't understand the premise of
       | this argument.                   Internal resistance is an
       | attempt to avoid the pain we associate with successfully doing
       | the thing.
       | 
       | We subconsciously believe that succeeding in doing something --
       | that we've presumably never done before -- will cause us some
       | "emotional pain", thus we go to lengths to avoid it? If what
       | we're attempting is novel, how could we possibly know that? Even
       | if we were to assume that, why would this "pain" override the
       | elation of success?
       | 
       | I can understand the argument that people procrastinate because
       | of the fear of failure...but the fear of success? I don't get it.
        
         | hypertele-Xii wrote:
         | Back when I was in school, I was consistently punished for
         | succeeding too much. Finished with my tasks? Here's extra. Knew
         | more than the teacher about the subject? Shut up mister wise
         | guy. Understood the subject and wanted to discuss it? There's
         | no time for debate.
         | 
         | Made something amazing on the computer? Stop playing on the
         | computer, go outside instead.
         | 
         | Made a lot of money? Get robbed.
         | 
         | Etc.
        
       | rob_c wrote:
       | Having written a doctoral thesis on particle physics, yes writing
       | is hard. Sometimes extremely hard. (sleepless nights and
       | depression inducing hard while you question your sanity and
       | ability into you discover to trust your own judgement more than
       | your peers, whilst taking on board their constructive input)
       | 
       | From experience its usually better to ask people currently
       | struggling to write what their problem is. It's usually so
       | personal and unique that a blanket "you can do it" isn't as
       | helpful as it might sound. If very nicely intended and being
       | supportive.
       | 
       | Aside, I don't feel the need to add the letters after my name for
       | some reason, might be because I'm still engaged in research and
       | find this off putting...
        
       | adrianmonk wrote:
       | Hmm, maybe I should try increasing the voltage.
        
       | jgrowl wrote:
       | In the villa of Ormen, Stands a solitary candle.
       | 
       | In the centre of it all, Your eyes
        
       | weregiraffe wrote:
       | I have external resistance too, in the form of Hacker News
       | articles.
        
       | asplake wrote:
       | Less mysterious: "Immunity to change", Kegan & Lahey (HBR, 2009)
        
       | overthemoon wrote:
       | I think a lot of people don't do the thing they want to do for
       | many reasons, but I found this helpful. If nothing else it's good
       | advice to be curious about what's going on inside your head, and
       | not to jump to condemnation. Who knows, maybe it is a simple lack
       | of discipline, but I haven't found that such an assumption brings
       | me closer to the goal, which means that even if it's "right" it's
       | not useful.
        
         | joombaga wrote:
         | No amount of metacognition or framing has ever gotten me out of
         | a rut.
         | 
         | > Internal resistance is not immovable -- it responds to
         | reason, to alternative scenarios, to making space for the
         | emotions that seem like such a threat
         | 
         | This has not been my experience. My own internal resistance
         | responds to people being impressed with what I'm doing and
         | expressing that to me, or a eureka moment (which typically come
         | when I'm watching Star Trek or cooking a meal or doing some
         | other activity instead of the thing I'm trying to accomplish).
         | The eureka moment trigger is a special circumstance though;
         | most of the time if there's a puzzle to solve I won't disengage
         | from the problem. Usually I just have seemingly random bouts of
         | productivity. I feel very fortunate to have a job that allows
         | me to work when I'm mentally able.
        
       | tgv wrote:
       | Any evidence that "[i]t holds a lot of knowledge about what we
       | secretly believe we might be able to do", or that my "brain [is]
       | so afraid of the costs of [me] doing the thing"? Any evidendence
       | that it's on my side? How does internal resistance get
       | operationalized anyway? Because it sounds suspiciously like
       | "can't-do-it'-itis to me.
        
       | swayvil wrote:
       | Maybe it really is actually a bad thing.
       | 
       | And by "it" I mean the important thing that you are resisting.
       | 
       | It's actually a bad thing. And you have convinced yourself that
       | it's a good thing. But you aren't completely convinced.
       | 
       | Deep down you know that it really is a very bad thing. One more
       | step on a march of doom that you have been trying to escape since
       | forever. A special door that, once passed through, your waste and
       | hell will truly and finally be LOCKED IN (relatively speaking).
       | 
       | I mean, nobody dreams as a child of sitting on their office-butt
       | playing mental legos forever. But it's very easy to convince
       | yourself that it is great. And the whole world will help you in
       | that endeavor. It will tell you encouraging stories and feed you
       | big paychecks. It will tell you that you are a rock star.
       | 
       | You will be helped at every turn to forget the life that you lost
       | and to pretend that playing robot is a truly good and desirable
       | thing.
       | 
       | Maybe this great procrastination is your gut trying to tell you
       | something.
        
         | balfirevic wrote:
         | > to forget the life that you lost
         | 
         | What life would that be?
        
           | agent327 wrote:
           | A life of creativity, of choice, of mental and physical
           | stimulation, of work that you feel is meaningful instead of
           | simply required.
        
           | [deleted]
        
       | kayodelycaon wrote:
       | As with most posts of this type, it assumes you are neurotypical
       | and not dealing with other issues that compromise executive
       | function.
       | 
       | This isn't a bad thing, it's just important to point out there is
       | a prerequisite condition that must be met before this advice
       | becomes useful.
        
         | echelon wrote:
         | I've got ADHD _and_ this.
         | 
         | I couldn't be happier this came across the HN feed today,
         | because it seems to accurately answer so many questions I've
         | had about my performance on personal projects recently.
         | 
         | I spent months working on the next version of https://vo.codes,
         | and I've only got about five hours of frontend work to do
         | before launching it. I've sit on it for a month now.
         | 
         | What I think is happening is that I'm worried about my next
         | project in virtual production (which I'm picking back up). I'm
         | worried I've fallen too far behind, that the incumbent powers
         | have already won and that I'll be wasting my energy. But I
         | still think I have tremendous value to add, and that there is a
         | discernable path to success, and that I'm holding myself back
         | by worrying about vo.codes. It's caused a sort of deadlock.
         | 
         | This has helped me make sense of it and approach it a new way.
         | Hopefully it's the nudge I needed to unblock myself.
         | 
         | Anxiety, ADHD, internal resistance. I shouldn't blame myself so
         | much.
        
           | navjack27 wrote:
           | I think you're worried that all of the stimulating part is
           | over in launching it will be the boring part. I have ADHD too
           | I hate the ending part of any project I've ever done and I've
           | never finished anything. My favorite parts are setting up
           | projects organizing projects and figuring out a workflow for
           | projects. Making them and doing the actionable part is
           | reasonable but actually finishing it and still having Steam
           | and interest to finish is close to impossible and I haven't
           | figured it out yet and I'm 32 years old.
        
             | navjack27 wrote:
             | But yeah for sure blaming yourself or calling yourself lazy
             | or saying you don't know how or any sort of negative self-
             | talk when you have this kind of brain is just not healthy
             | and it's something that I wish a lot of other people with
             | ADHD would realize that they should not be doing
        
               | chrsig wrote:
               | It's a challenge, because on the one hand, the negative
               | self-talk can be motivating, in a not so great way (ie.,
               | hyper-vigilance)...but also, we've got society
               | continually calling us lazy, uncaring, unmotivated, etc.
               | to the point of even denying that ADHD is a real
               | condition.
        
             | navjack27 wrote:
             | I haven't read the actual article yet but whatever this
             | internal resistance is I mean yeah... I have internal
             | resistance about like everything at least what I'm guessing
             | this person is trying to mean. I'll reply to this after I
             | read it and see if I was right but I mean like... The
             | easiest thing for me to do is to wake up sit on the couch
             | take my meds and start watching YouTube. I'll know I want
             | to work on my own personal projects or whatever on my
             | computer and I'll be saying in my head over and over "get
             | off the couch. Go work on that stuff you want to work on."
             | And I just don't... Until I do and then when I do it's 12
             | hours later and I've accomplished a whole bunch of work and
             | I've neglected myself. It's a fun time
        
             | echelon wrote:
             | I can relate very closely. It's almost spot on.
             | 
             | I think part of it lies with the final tasks being
             | perceived as easy and routine, which is difficult for my
             | brain to view as anything other than "busy work".
             | 
             | Of course much of the nature of the work can be that way,
             | but in aggregate can be challenging enough to spur
             | interest. Until the end, that is.
             | 
             | One hack I have is to have larger plans in mind for what
             | needs to be done after launch. The next arcs of work. Make
             | them big, and then finishing can feel like you're not even
             | close to done.
        
               | navjack27 wrote:
               | Hahaha "busy work"! Yeah that's why in Middle School I
               | basically failed every grade because I would argue with
               | my parents for hours about the concept of homework being
               | busy work. This obviously got worse after I overheard a
               | teacher talking about some sort of a quota for homework
               | that they were supposed to be meeting as teachers...
        
             | navjack27 wrote:
             | Okay I just read the article. Yeah this reads as some sort
             | of a baby's first getting to know thyself kind of thing.
             | I've already done that kind of personal soul searching for
             | myself and that's why I don't beat myself up about these
             | kind of things. Oh yeah I realized another thing that
             | usually Sparks my motivation like if there's a technical
             | article or a review of a piece of computer hardware that I
             | want to do... Being frustrated at the current other works
             | covering said thing not being good enough in my eyes...
             | Frustration in general being angry in general motivates me
             | in a healthy way. "You covered this this and this but you
             | didn't say this about the windows install or this about how
             | this was set up and you didn't cover this" and my first
             | impulse is never too go to the comment section it's to go
             | on Amazon or Newegg and buy the thing and then review the
             | thing better. Not even just review stuff for my website but
             | I mean a lot of other things are like that with me it's
             | weird. I love finding stuff where other people explained it
             | just wrong or did something just wrong in my eyes and then
             | I go and do it better or correctly. That is if my
             | motivation takes me all the way to the end and I finish it.
        
           | codegeek wrote:
           | How would you go about identifying whether you have ADHD or
           | not ? Any tips ? I really really suspect I have it but I have
           | never talked to anyone about it.
        
             | kitsune_ wrote:
             | Unexplained underachievement.
        
               | echelon wrote:
               | I don't think looking at outcomes is a fair assessment at
               | all.
               | 
               | I academically excelled, have a successful career, an
               | early employee IPO exit, and a spate of really
               | interesting side projects.
               | 
               | Yet I struggle with leading a normal life, prioritizing,
               | sporadic and extreme hyper-focus, and frequent loss of
               | interest. (If something doesn't interest me, I just won't
               | do it. I have to pay people to do taxes, and I sometimes
               | wish I could pay people to do my job or parts of it.)
               | 
               | Anecdotal, but I think your characterization could be
               | misleading.
        
               | codegeek wrote:
               | Yea I agree. I am actually reasonably accomplished in my
               | life and career but I procrastinate like hell and there
               | are times when I am just not doing anything. Perfect
               | example is today. Been browsing HN so far when I have a
               | few tasks to complete for my business. My own business
               | where I know this will be make an impact but I am just
               | not doing it.
        
             | JadeNB wrote:
             | > I really really suspect I have it but I have never talked
             | to anyone about it.
             | 
             | Please let me add another to the voices saying that the
             | advice you take on a medical matter should not be that of a
             | random internet stranger. Please do talk to a professional
             | about it!
        
             | blktiger wrote:
             | If you want to know if you have it or not you should go get
             | tested by a professional. If you suspect you have it then
             | either you have it and they can help, or you don't but they
             | can help you improve whatever it is that makes you suspect
             | you have it.
        
             | echelon wrote:
             | There are several different manifestations of the disease,
             | so be aware of that. Some that present with hyperactivity,
             | some that don't. Look up the symptoms and see if they ring
             | a bell, then go to see a specialist.
        
             | chiefgeek wrote:
             | Work with a professional. From numerous anecdotal stories,
             | if you do have ADHD, taking medicine such as Ritalin or
             | Adderal will radically alter you (in a good way). 15+ years
             | ago, I had a psychiatrist who insisted I had ADHD. I took
             | Adderal for a couple years. It did absolutely zero for me.
             | Not one iota of change. I know others who swear by it.
             | There was another comment in the thread about anxiety and
             | hyper vigilance being a problem with similar symptoms.
             | After much work, it's safe to say this was more my issue.
             | There's a book called "Driven to Distraction" that is
             | decent as well.
        
           | SubiculumCode wrote:
           | The fear of finishing in real. The last push is always the
           | hardest.
        
         | mjburgess wrote:
         | Many with ADHD also suffer from _this_ problem also. So it is a
         | useful article either way.
        
           | chrsig wrote:
           | You say that, but as a person with ADHD, I couldn't help but
           | just skim the article. Not useful at all ;)
        
         | ttul wrote:
         | In other words, the article leaves aside the possibility that
         | you might have ADHD, which is present in an estimated 7% of
         | people in a clinically significant way, and likely far more to
         | a degree that wouldn't satisfy the DSM, but is still a
         | handicap.
        
           | moosey wrote:
           | Anxiety will do it too. So will hypervigilance, which
           | presents with ADHD like symptoms but arises from trauma.
        
             | SubiculumCode wrote:
             | My procrastination dropped a lot once I medically
             | intervened on ADHD, Anxiety, and Depression. I wonder where
             | I'd be now if I had taken these steps 20 years ago.
        
               | ttul wrote:
               | 20 years ago, the science was a lot less conclusive on
               | ADHD. The drugs were far less sophisticated as well.
               | Today, the condition is highly treatable (90%) with
               | medication.
        
       | bruce343434 wrote:
       | I'm sorry but I find this incredibly vague. I'm not doing stuff
       | because I fear the pain of success ? What pain??
        
       | sumthinprofound wrote:
       | no, sometimes I am definitely lazy.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | gala8y wrote:
         | ...and it's just great. Capacity to be lazy (being very
         | important in itself) does not negate existence of this 'pro
         | status quo' force, holding you back.
        
       | audit wrote:
       | WRT >"... 1. Recognise that internal resistance is on your side
       | ..."
       | 
       | I disagree somewhat, and I have a different explanation.
       | 
       | ---
       | 
       | Each one of us is born with talents (gifts) and some weaknesses.
       | 
       | If we grow up, and then become adults in the environment that
       | does not discover our talents, and, opposite, emphasises our
       | weaknesses -- then we become:                 - unhappy,
       | - dis-engaged,               - often resort to cheating as a way
       | to 'pad up' our weaknesses,              - often blaim others.
       | Sometimes rightfully so, sometimes not.
       | 
       | The environment in which we grow up -- does not really depend on
       | us. Depends on parents, state of peace, state of economy.
       | 
       | Yes, we have to be adaptable, but when the adoptation requires us
       | to compete in fields, eco-systems that does not emphsize our
       | inborn talents -- we do not do well.
       | 
       | We are not all meant to be technology visionaries, data
       | scientists, lawyers, public speakers, and surgeons.
       | 
       | But a society, an economic system that emphasises one of the
       | above (as an example), is forcing the rest to 'adjust'.
       | 
       | That 'adjustment' - _is the friction_. But it does not just
       | depend on an individual.
       | 
       | Really, a global solution is the one, that takes advantage of the
       | different talents we have. That should be the purpose of
       | statesman (not career politicians), that offer to dedicate their
       | service to their country (or the world).
       | 
       | And, certainly on a personal level                 - honesty,
       | - work ethic             - rejection of ideologies that justify
       | 'achieve whatever using any means necessary',             -
       | rejection of unfair biases (biases based on inborn characterists
       | that 'lock down  person's fate)
       | 
       | Would have to be part of that solution.
       | 
       | Believing that you always have something unique, something
       | specially good, specially powerfull about yourself -- has to be
       | emphrasized, at a personal level.
        
       | scotty79 wrote:
       | That's very interesting way of thinking about those things.
       | 
       | That success (defined as successfully completing required work)
       | causes damage, causes pain, often not as a side effect of the
       | work that needs to be put in to achieve success, but by the
       | success itself.
       | 
       | That parts of us recognizes the harm of success and resists when
       | the other part pushes blindly for what it thinks the end goal
       | should be.
       | 
       | Also mitigation strategies seem novel. Discovering what you fear
       | about successfully finishing your work and trying to lessen the
       | strength of those fears. Or doing small steps like acknowledging
       | that doing 30 minutes of work will not result in achieving
       | success so you can do that amount of work safely.
       | 
       | One common fear might be of that the result of you successfully
       | finishing your task won't live up to your imagination about it.
        
       | dmos62 wrote:
       | It's never that you can't, it's that you won't. The distinction
       | means a lot. It takes some luck to realise that all the I-can'ts
       | are actually you trying to escape an internal conflict by putting
       | yourself down. The internal conflict is about you wanting it and
       | not wanting it at the same time. E.g. you want to be a success,
       | but trying is scary. I don't really know how not to be afraid.
       | It's something I'm working on. But, knowing that you're choosing
       | not to do something because you're afraid is so much better than
       | thinking that you're not capable. It's literally the difference
       | between apathy or depression and discomfort.
        
         | JadeNB wrote:
         | > It's never that you can't, it's that you won't.
         | 
         | While this sounds good, and I think is a reasonable guide for
         | many life choices, it's simply not true. If I want to lift that
         | enormous boulder over there, then it's not that I won't, it's
         | that I can't. (Maybe this needs caveats: if I want to lift that
         | enormous boulder over there only using my hands, etc.)
         | 
         | I could believe something like "it's never that you can't try,
         | but that you won't try", and that covers a lot of my
         | procrastination; but I'm not sure if it's strong enough to
         | cover the point you'd like to make.
        
           | dmos62 wrote:
           | Good points. What I said applies most obviously to situations
           | like "I can't get out of bed", but I think it also applies to
           | "I can't get this done", but maybe in more subtle ways.
        
       | robot_no_419 wrote:
       | "Ah, that's it. I'm not lazy, I have internal resistance. It all
       | makes sense now", I said as I browsed HN and packed another bowl
       | for my bong.
        
       | exolymph wrote:
       | Admittedly I didn't and will not read TFA, but this title... like
       | yeah, "internal resistance" is what laziness and lack of
       | discipline feel like from the insider! Those aren't the _only_
       | possible attributions but they sure are common ones. (I speak
       | from experience, both personal and otherwise.)
        
       | infogulch wrote:
       | Took a lot of words but it seems reasonable and resonates with my
       | experience.
       | 
       | I guess "internal resistance" is a kind of bias towards inaction.
       | Not a bad trait if you're in a resource constrained scarcity
       | environment, but it's not a great strategy outside of that. If
       | there's anything to overcome its probably a scarcity mindset when
       | it's unfounded.
        
       | jchook wrote:
       | If this article resonates with you, I recommend reading The War
       | of Art by Steven Pressfield.
        
       | beauHD wrote:
       | For me, pertinent things seem to 'bubble up' and I will get them
       | done regardless of resistance. Resistance doesn't mean the thing
       | needs to be immediately done. The mind has a clever feature in
       | that it surfaces subconscious goal-setting at the right time, and
       | on an as-needed basis.
       | 
       | In a professional and career context, however, you would be
       | required to get tasks done straight away. But for artists and
       | even dedicated loafers or those who enjoy being idle, the
       | important stuff rises to the top naturally and it gets done.
        
         | pm90 wrote:
         | > The mind has a clever feature in that it surfaces
         | subconscious goal-setting at the right time, and on an as-
         | needed basis.
         | 
         | I've heard of a strategy where you think really hard about a
         | problem, and then you go and do other unrelated things and your
         | mind will come up with a solution. I have found that this does
         | happen in practice. By stepping away from the problem, I'm
         | basically forgetting all the context that made me approach the
         | problem from the original angle and thus my mind tries a
         | different approach. Often this new approach will also not work,
         | but there might be things I discover when trying these
         | approaches that lead to yet another approach.... I guess this
         | process goes on until either a good enough solution is found or
         | I give up.
        
         | the_only_law wrote:
         | > "I choose a lazy person to do a hard job. Because a lazy
         | person will find an easy way to do it."
         | 
         | Unfortunately, in my experience, I'm more likely to just
         | determine the hard problem is not worth the effort to complete.
        
         | luckyandroid wrote:
         | Big difference between 'someone who cuts corners' and 'someone
         | who won't do the task at all' when it comes to the phrase 'lazy
         | person'.
         | 
         | The first person will do the task, they just deemed it not
         | worthy of their focused effort. The second person will find any
         | excuse not to do it at all, which is the 'resistance' the
         | article talks about.
        
       | onelastjob wrote:
       | This is excellent! I've lived this experience with a graduate
       | thesis project that has taken over a decade to complete. Stephen
       | Pressfield's books (especially Do The Work) felt very close to
       | the mark, but I also couldn't buy into the idea that the
       | resistance should be thought of as something external (a
       | malevolent force in the universe). I think this article solves
       | the mystery of what the resistance actually is. This
       | understanding of the resistance combined with Pressfield's book
       | Do The Work could help a lot of people that are
       | "procrastinating".
        
       | kiba wrote:
       | I came around to the idea that procrastination or other form of
       | akrasia is an emotional problem, not a discipline problem.
       | 
       | That said, it doesn't really give me new tools or tricks to deal
       | with the problems?
       | 
       | It's still the same: podomoro or timeboxing, giving oneself a
       | reward for completing an objective, trying to complete a given
       | task every week, and so forth.
       | 
       | I supposed I could give mental health therapies a try, I guess?
        
         | papandada wrote:
         | I definitely see procrastination linked to emotional processing
         | issues for me. Maybe it's possible that there are things which
         | provide immediate benefits, but for me many things I tried
         | evaporated and I was still left with this base note, so to
         | speak, of myself. I went to therapy, I went to 12 step
         | meetings, I read books, I journalled, I talked the hell out of
         | my thoughts and feelings with certain friends, got divorced,
         | took medication, found another amazing woman to marry, all
         | along the way there was progress and regress, blind spots, lots
         | of blind spots, lots of denial and resistance and fighting and
         | turmoil and avoidance. The "answers" for me so far are
         | absolutely nothing that haven't been said a thousand times in
         | every place, but having met them myself in my own way at my own
         | time. I'm not sure I could have gone any faster than I did, and
         | I'm ok with that (now, at least).
        
           | pm90 wrote:
           | > The "answers" for me so far are absolutely nothing that
           | haven't been said a thousand times in every place, but having
           | met them myself in my own way at my own time. I'm not sure I
           | could have gone any faster than I did, and I'm ok with that
           | (now, at least)
           | 
           | Don't want to play armchair therapist, but that's really the
           | best anyone can really do.
        
           | mrweasel wrote:
           | It's a little like dieting really. If there was something
           | someone could just say to make your weight, procrastination,
           | whatever go away, then these problems would not exist.
           | 
           | There are exercises you can do, mentally and physically,
           | which can help guide you through self-improvement, but they
           | all require that we actually do them.
           | 
           | Some times is feels like I go years without making any
           | progress with myself. Other times is just takes a small new
           | action to gain remarkable results. Like you, I'm not sure it
           | could have gone any faster and that's okay.
        
         | luckyandroid wrote:
         | Everyone's different. You can read a hundred different ways to
         | get around the resistance, but doing them 100% the way they're
         | described likely WON'T work for you. You have to find the
         | things you do like about it, and discard the parts you don't,
         | and continue to refine your personal routine over the course of
         | a lifetime.
         | 
         | The most important part of that process is continually (once a
         | week or a couple times a month, in my opinion) taking a step
         | back and assessing what is and isn't working for you, then
         | taking the time to find a way around it.
        
       | renewiltord wrote:
       | Hmm, interesting idea. I'll try it out.
        
       | jacksonkmarley wrote:
       | > in my experience it is usually tied to some kind of predicted
       | loss of love and connection
       | 
       | This seems like a creative explanation that probably makes an
       | article such as this seem a bit more quirky and interesting or
       | something. Otherwise it's not a bad piece, but I don't think
       | potential loss of love or connection is necessary to explain not
       | wanting to do some difficult/annoying/time consuming task.
        
         | luckyandroid wrote:
         | I think the article is describing resistance not just in terms
         | of 'difficult' creative processes but any excuse you could make
         | for any action that would likely benefit you.
         | 
         | Hence that line is more for people who resist finding new
         | connections to people because of past problems. Learned fear of
         | action is just that - learned. And it can be unlearned given
         | the time and practice.
        
           | jacksonkmarley wrote:
           | Well the first example in the article was about the author
           | completing her PhD, and it mentioned productivity and making
           | use of talents, and seemed to be talking about fear of
           | success, so I read it as a (strange) extension of that.
           | 
           | If it was meant to be about more personal relationship type
           | stuff the author could have discussed that explicitly. Maybe
           | the piece needed an extra paragraph to explain better what
           | the link was.
        
             | luckyandroid wrote:
             | Yeah I think their analogies are a bit mixed, but the
             | general idea of 'learned reaction' is still there, even if
             | the examples the author used didn't mesh well together.
        
       | janandonly wrote:
       | Reading this article made me wish there was a setting in Safari
       | (or a good plugin) that can block curse words.
       | 
       | Why on earth does an eloquent academic need to say f*ing or
       | gorramit every couple of sentences? It is not just needles, it is
       | also bad taste.
        
       | hirundo wrote:
       | Here's a sci-fi movie I'd like to see. A (space alien, mad
       | scientist, corporation, imp) unleashes a (bomb, virus, force
       | field, spell) that suddenly removes internal resistance from
       | everyone. Whatever intention wins the internal vote gets full
       | control of the rest of the psyche. Everyone immediately starts
       | working full bore on their (world saving invention, romantic
       | pursuit, profit plan, great novel, hare brained scheme) at once,
       | and the (evil, well-intentioned-but-foolish) instigators watch as
       | civilization implodes. Until (Hiro Protagonist) saves the day
       | with a well timed (hack, antidote, counter spell). Making
       | everyone boring again, but safe.
        
         | avaldes wrote:
         | Like an inverted "Serenity" movie.
        
         | Andrex wrote:
         | Sounds like the setting of The Giver. Their solution to prevent
         | implosion was to give all memories of the old world to one
         | person.
        
         | hprotagonist wrote:
         | > Until (Hiro Protagonist) saves the day with a well timed
         | (hack, antidote, counter spell).
         | 
         | Maybe Babel was the best thing that ever happened to us.
        
         | bob33212 wrote:
         | This is my biggest problem with all the people promoting
         | entrepreneurship for everyone. If everyone took two years off
         | to start a company there would be no one keeping the lights on.
        
           | whatshisface wrote:
           | If everyone started taking two years off to start a company
           | the incentives offered by existing companies would rise until
           | the tide was stemmed.
        
           | kwhitefoot wrote:
           | > there would be no one keeping the lights on.
           | 
           | Why would that be? Two years is only four percent of a
           | working lifetime and it won't be at the same time for
           | everyone. And not every company takes two years to create
           | anyway.
           | 
           | Another way of looking at it is that two years is less time
           | than it takes to get a degree.
        
           | codegeek wrote:
           | Doesnt' matter. Most people won't. I have worked
           | professionally for 17 years now and last 6 running my own
           | business. I can tell you with a guarantee that there are lot
           | of people who just want a job, get a paycheck and get the f
           | out (not that anything is wrong with that). They don't care
           | about entrepreneurship or whatever. So there always will be
           | "employees" for every "employer".
        
             | greggman3 wrote:
             | until UBI?
        
               | codegeek wrote:
               | I doubt UBI will make everyone stop working. As far as I
               | understand, the point of UBI is to ensure that people are
               | not homeless, have enough to put food on the table and it
               | covers your absolute basic needs. Lets say we implement
               | UBI at 1K/Month which is what people like Andrew Yang
               | proposed. That is not enough to just sit at home all day.
               | You still need to make money but hopefully with that 1K,
               | you won't be homeless (or at least thats the idea).
        
               | corvuscorvid wrote:
               | I'm confident that there are many, many people who would
               | choose to continue living with no permanent home (tent,
               | RV, etc) and spend their UBI on oxy, meth, heroin or
               | crack.
        
               | SuoDuanDao wrote:
               | At least they wouldn't need to turn to petty crime quite
               | so often. And they'd have a means of getting some
               | stability in their lives, which tends to reduce rates of
               | addiction.
        
               | vmladenov wrote:
               | I'm still not clear on why UBI won't just raise the price
               | floor on everything (rent in your example) to the point
               | where it becomes ineffective again. In Mountain View,
               | landlords raised rents when they heard companies were
               | giving a bonus for people living within 15 miles. Some
               | even included it in their advertising.
        
               | james-skemp wrote:
               | > Some even included it in their advertising.
               | 
               | I'm really curious what the language/spin was to make
               | _that_ something that was included in the advertising.
        
       | armchairhacker wrote:
       | I think that, instead of saying "you're not lazy", we should take
       | the stigma away from laziness and say "you are lazy, but don't
       | feel bad". Laziness is a character trait present in all humans,
       | some more than others, and we should acknowledge it and work to
       | become less lazy, without punishing it or being ashamed of it.
       | 
       | You are "lazy" if you don't do something that would benefit you
       | because it's too much effort. That sounds reasonable, right?
       | Except according to this article, you're not lazy, you have
       | "internal resistance." Or in similar articles, you're not lazy if
       | you have depression or ADHD, because it's your mental illness.
       | 
       | But then, who _is_ lazy? Where do we draw the line when someone
       | is depressed vs. merely sad, or ADHD vs. merely inattentive?
       | Moreover, since you can 't always tell of someone has a mental
       | illness and you definitely can't see "internal resistance", you
       | technically can't state that anyone is lazy.
       | 
       | Now, I don't want to attack people with mental illnesses. If you
       | have depression or ADHD or burnout or are overwhelmed, you're not
       | a bad person. But you are lazy. Calling it something else is just
       | beating around the bush.
       | 
       | Instead, we as a society need to change how we look at laziness.
       | Just because you're lazy, doesn't mean you should punish
       | yourself, or consider yourself "worse" than someone with more
       | discipline. Don't even try to just "power through" the laziness.
       | None of those things work, and often actually lead to more
       | laziness. Honestly, the author does a good job explaining what
       | you _should_ do. But - if you 're lazy, you're lazy, and calling
       | it something else like "internal resistance" is just sugar-
       | coating it.
        
         | hypertele-Xii wrote:
         | > work to become less lazy, without punishing it
         | 
         | But to laziness, work _is_ punishment.
        
           | armchairhacker wrote:
           | See, that's a fallacy people believe which prevents them from
           | acknowledging their laziness. The key is to work smarter, not
           | harder.
           | 
           | Some things, such as getting fit or studying, are going to
           | take effort. But the effort is an unintended side-effect of
           | the work, not the goal. In my experience, if you work towards
           | the solution and not think of it as "putting in X effort",
           | the perceived effort is a lot less.
        
       | jokoon wrote:
       | It's weird how we don't want to admit we are overworked.
       | Competition is such a horror show.
       | 
       | I really disagree with the whole "procrastination" thing. It's
       | normal to feel depressed, it's part of nature of being tired, our
       | brains are fragile and require a lot of energy and sleep.
       | 
       | I bet that I would generally would be much happier working at a
       | moderate pace in a farm rather than using my brain to do some
       | other complex thing.
       | 
       | I went to do some military training for 2 weeks, it was quite
       | difficult and demanding, but in a way, it has the good stuff of a
       | holiday: you're outside, you use your arms and legs, you have no
       | time to use your brain which often demands more energy.
       | 
       | Do you really understand how stressful it is for a brain to
       | perform programming? Our bodies are not made to sustain such
       | mental effort. Brains are small but they consume a lot of energy
       | to function.
        
         | laurent92 wrote:
         | In 2010 I went to prune trees in Australia. Immediately, my
         | depression stopped. Almost as if using the full body made
         | everything better than using only the brain and speaking to a
         | computer all day.
        
           | jdgoesmarching wrote:
           | It's funny how many tech people are getting into trades or
           | very manual hobbies. I keep ending up at the page for my
           | local community college's woodworking program. Most of my
           | hobbies now are DIY projects.
        
           | balfirevic wrote:
           | It sounds to me like it's not an entirely fair comparison.
           | Pruning trees full-time for 10-15 years would be more
           | comparable.
           | 
           | I don't claim to know if conclusion would be different or the
           | same, though.
        
           | marttt wrote:
           | +1, I've been an on-and-off brush cutter and tree planter for
           | several years. I can fully confirm this: physical work
           | outdoors does wonders to mental health.
           | 
           | The interesting part is that I can be _really_ exhausted from
           | a day in the woods, struggling to somehow get to the car, etc
           | -- but after 7-8 hours of decent sleep, all of this is gone!
           | No muscle pains next morning, no nothing. It is incredible
           | how well our body can handle and cure physical stress.
           | 
           | Coping with mental exhaustion or overwork, however, seems to
           | be _way_ harder for me -- to the point of ruining the next
           | day entirely. A deep explanation of this deviation (our
           | abilities for physical recovery vs mental recovery) would be
           | really interesting.
        
             | zwayhowder wrote:
             | One thing I found when I worked on farms clearing paddocks
             | or putting up fences was you always had a sense of
             | accomplishment. You could look back at your days effort and
             | see it while you had a cold drink.
             | 
             | I work 18 hours on a presentation for the exec at work and
             | the next day it is like it never happened. I never get the
             | real mental pay off that I would get if I spent 18 hours
             | clearing a paddock.
        
             | myself248 wrote:
             | Concur 100%. I've always made sure my work has some
             | physical component. Even if that's just soldering, I need
             | to use my hands and know that something is different
             | tomorrow because I did this work today.
             | 
             | The quickest way to crush someone's spirit is to make them
             | feel that their work is for nothing. Making prisoners break
             | rocks in the prison yard, for instance. Or pushing
             | spreadsheets and git commits endlessly, to no tangible
             | change.
        
               | marttt wrote:
               | > I need to use my hands and know that something is
               | different tomorrow because I did this work today.
               | 
               | Mhm, in physical work, you _always_ see a result -- even
               | if it 's a mess or failure. You get direct, no-bullshit
               | feedback every single day. Mental work, in contrast, most
               | typically ends in an abstraction: you work all day long
               | and there _is_ a result, but you can 't always _see_ it
               | the way you see a planted tree in the forest.
               | 
               | Yup, I'm a primitive creature, devastatingly tied to the
               | simplest of my senses: seeing, hearing, touching.
        
         | coldtea wrote:
         | > _It 's weird how we don't want to admit we are overworked._
         | 
         | Or that evolution works to make big changes in cycles of 1000s
         | of years, and that 6 million years of hominin evolution out in
         | nature in accordance with pre-electricity natural day cycles
         | (and more malleable schedules), are not compatible with the
         | mandatory:
         | 
         | (1) ass in the chair,
         | 
         | (2) looking at a screen,
         | 
         | (3) working with abstract information,
         | 
         | (4) 9 to 5, 5 days a week,
         | 
         | (5) inside an interior environment
         | 
         | (6) with technical lighting"
         | 
         | that's been "the norm" for a large part of the population since
         | the 60s...
         | 
         | (or with factory-style work, that's been imposed on populations
         | since the 18th century).
        
           | goodpoint wrote:
           | > (4) 9 to 5, 5 days a week,
           | 
           | A lot of people work more than 40 hours a week, plus
           | additional time spent learning and so on...
        
             | coldtea wrote:
             | Which just makes it worse. And then there are commutes and
             | so on to add to that.
             | 
             | But I wanted to state the minimum typical requirement, and
             | show it's bad enough already.
        
         | jcims wrote:
         | IMHO the problem with programming isn't the total stress on the
         | brain, it's that there is very little observable output of all
         | of that effort.
         | 
         | I spent some time working with commercial HVAC and some of the
         | problems there were on par with the most difficult technical
         | problems I've worked through in information systems. The
         | difference is that, with HVAC, all of that effort results in an
         | outcome that connects with the limbic system in a way that
         | doubling throughput or halving latency doesn't.
        
         | _moof wrote:
         | Indeed. It's amazing to me that in all the conversations about
         | work/life balance, employers never consider the mind-blowingly
         | innovative option of _working less._
         | 
         | Instead we all get free subscriptions to meditation apps now.
         | Thanks for the stopwatch. Can I go outside now?
         | 
         | I left the software industry for several years to do a job that
         | required getting up and moving around, leaving the building,
         | interacting with people... it was tiring, but in a much
         | different way than programming. A much better way, if that
         | makes any sense. It's difficult to describe. But I'm convinced
         | that office work is poison at the doses we take it.
        
         | systemvoltage wrote:
         | Unpopular opinion: I'll continue to work hard and have an
         | advantage over others (not literally with my coworkers, but
         | generally in my profession). Competition drives me and it fuels
         | everything I do. Without it, I don't want to live anymore.
         | Working and solving problems is extremely fun for me.
         | 
         | Even if I am not writing code, fixing things in the house,
         | personal projects, helping others, just _doing_ something is
         | fun and challenging.
        
           | ramphastidae wrote:
           | I don't think the downvotes are fair here, but I'd just like
           | to mention that this is basically what everyone in the early
           | stages of burnout says ... just be careful not to attach so
           | much of your self-image to your work ethic, because over a
           | long enough timeline, you will get screwed over many times
           | unfairly despite working harder and doing things better than
           | everyone else, and that may deeply shock you based on your
           | opinion above.
        
             | systemvoltage wrote:
             | I've been doing this for 20 years and haven't faced
             | burnout. Quite peaceful mentally and physically fit. It is
             | precisely not about self image for me.
             | 
             | Competition is inherent to human experience. Watching
             | sports wouldn't be popular otherwise.
             | 
             | A world where everyone not competing to be their best would
             | be an extremely depressing place.
        
         | nzmsv wrote:
         | In before the other comments to this effect:
         | 
         | - You are weak
         | 
         | - Your grandparents had it worse
         | 
         | - Think of the people working for minimum wage
         | 
         | - Some of us actually love programming so much we will happily
         | sacrifice our health; this choice is morally superior because
         | we say so
         | 
         | - I haven't had a vacation in 20 years and neither should you
         | 
         | /sarcasm off
        
           | n8cpdx wrote:
           | I really like society as it is. I, as rare as it is, identify
           | as a neoliberal and I generally am invested in how things
           | are. I like to see people working hard, I work hard myself,
           | and aside from wanting a larger safety net, largely value the
           | idea of a competitive market for labor.
           | 
           | Those ideas, I suspect much more prevalent on HN than other
           | sites, lead to defensiveness when antiwork or work-critical
           | ideas are shared. Arguments about grandparents and weakness
           | are generally missing the point or intellectually dishonest,
           | and I know because I've made those arguments/comments many
           | times.
           | 
           | Looking past that defensiveness, I have a hard time arguing
           | that everything above isn't right; modern work is taxing and
           | when you're trying to work 8+ (I naturally tend towards 10+)
           | hours a day, stay healthy, and also pursue hobbies and
           | personal development, it is no surprise that people are
           | breaking down.
           | 
           | I want to see more serious engagement with efforts to make
           | work more sustainable for people, ideally without limiting
           | burnout. Maybe the right answer is to just do less, but I
           | want to have my cake and eat it too.
        
             | courtf wrote:
             | Appreciate this comment, thank you.
             | 
             | For many years I had a sort of ruthless determination to
             | get ahead and work hard. It mostly helped me back then, as
             | many obstacles then were the sort that could be brute-
             | forced, and it was addictive in a way as well. I could feel
             | myself improving, could see the progress happening etc. I
             | made lots of money for a while, got myself and my husband
             | ahead in life etc.
             | 
             | A few things happened that sort of scuttled my motivation.
             | The intrinsic rewards for the hard work I was doing stopped
             | arriving. In order to keep progressing personally, I would
             | need to engage in ever more competitive search for
             | fun/challenging work. The competitive aspect might have
             | excited me in the past, but I had by then been shafted one
             | time too many by petty politics and discrimination to feel
             | much interest in engaging with that aspect of the industry.
             | 
             | I could keep doing senior engineer work, mobile/backend
             | whatever, and occasionally find some new topic to excite
             | me, but often spend most of the time rehashing similar
             | ideas, or cleaning up other people's messes. So I burned
             | out, took some time to address my depression and have
             | gotten myself back together mentally, for the most part
             | (some amount of madness is crucial to hold onto).
             | 
             | But even now, when I look at new programming things I could
             | work on, I can't help but see them all as simply paths back
             | into a world that has lost its luster, full of people and
             | situations that waste my time and energy. I can still work
             | hard and build good software, but I just don't see why I
             | should when it will inevitably lead me back to a place that
             | almost destroyed me. Maybe that isn't true, maybe I should
             | be better about forgetting the past and not presuming what
             | my new experiences will look like. I'd love to be that
             | foolish again someday, but I just can't afford to take that
             | kind of risk anymore.
             | 
             | My temporary solution has been to work on stuff that isn't
             | programming, to become like a beginner again in some other
             | field. Philosophy, political science, history,
             | anthropology, classic literature and others have been great
             | to explore on my own and I've grown from these
             | explorations. So now I'm getting my rewards from new
             | sources. I still have the urge to make money, like a
             | survival instinct, but I'm fortunate to have a decently
             | stable life raft that I can float on for the time being.
        
               | thecoppinger wrote:
               | This really resonated with me, thank you.
               | 
               | "Some amount of madness is crucial to hold onto"
               | 
               | I think I would like this as my epitaph.
        
             | tonyedgecombe wrote:
             | >I like to see people working hard
             | 
             | That's the problem I have with neoliberals, they want to
             | impose their ideology on the rest of us.
        
             | nzmsv wrote:
             | My own view is this: money is a metric that our society
             | uses as a measure of usefulness of a certain individual for
             | others in the collective. Like any metric, it is imperfect
             | and doesn't capture nuance very well.
             | 
             | When you optimize for any metric, be it lines of code or
             | bank account balance, you generally get suboptimal results.
             | Doesn't mean the metric is useless. It's just not the only
             | source of truth.
        
             | _moof wrote:
             | > I like to see people working hard, I work hard myself
             | 
             | Yeah, see, this right here is the problem. There's this
             | belief that people objecting to current norms and standards
             | around work constitutes "not working hard," which is a non
             | sequitur.
             | 
             | In my experience most people want to work. They just don't
             | want to do it on the terms currently laid out for them--
             | terms that employers like to pretend are inviolable laws of
             | nature, not choices they make and are responsible for.
        
             | myself248 wrote:
             | I'm not anti-work, I'm anti-toil.
             | 
             | The industrial revolution was supposed to free humankind
             | from backbreaking labor and usher in an era of comfortable
             | enlightenment.
             | 
             | Instead, we got rampant inequality, environmental
             | devastation, sociological manipulation, and the internet of
             | shit. (Whose true effects we won't see until Cranky Bear
             | decides to show us all at once.) And huge numbers of people
             | still toil 50+ hours a week to keep their head barely above
             | water.
             | 
             | Work is fine, but the systems surrounding work have robbed
             | us.
        
       | spicyusername wrote:
       | This article first says that this phenomenon is not "something
       | that's wrong with us or our behaviour, something that needs to be
       | controlled, eradicated, tamed, left behind or put in its place."
       | 
       | Then it immediately defines a new term "internal resistance"
       | that's exactly defined as something that's "a part of us" and
       | explains how to work around it or "tame it".
        
         | gala8y wrote:
         | Maybe it isn't to clear, but the author tries to go in the
         | direction of not fighting it.
         | 
         | > 1. Recognise that internal resistance is on your side. Part
         | of what is so awful about the cycle-of-not-doing-the-thing is
         | that it feels so self-destructive. But internal resistance does
         | not want to destroy us; it literally wants the opposite! It
         | only exists to protect us from pain.
         | 
         | also
         | 
         | > There's another reason why I think we should treat internal
         | resistance as a form of wisdom rather than a malevolent
         | opponent. It holds a lot of knowledge about what we secretly
         | believe we might be able to do.
         | 
         | I think it is very beneficial to see this 'Resistance' as a
         | force inside you, mostly trying to keep the status quo, for
         | your benefit, unfortunately sometimes to the point of halting
         | you in all things possible.
         | 
         | Maybe I am reading to much into this article with my already
         | set up view, but my view is to recognize this part in us, that
         | does not want things done/changed and acknowledge its existence
         | (which we often want to ignore, bypass), explore possible
         | why's. This can be a really intimate experience, the a-ha
         | moment. The first (and most important step) would be
         | acknowledgment of its existence.
        
           | zepto wrote:
           | I think the article does just set up a new pathology. Your
           | read is much more benign.
           | 
           | The article's set up is actually quite harmful and
           | disempowering. It identifies resistance as a bundle of fears
           | and pain to be overcome in order to be able to 'just do' the
           | thing you are trying to do.
           | 
           | Obviously sometimes fear and pain do exist, and acceptance
           | and awareness of them makes it easier to move forward.
           | 
           | However most of the time I have found that the reason people
           | find themselves 'resisting' things they want to do is that
           | they lack some pragmatic knowledge of what the next step
           | should be and how to incorporate the overall goal into
           | whatever else they are doing. People who have learned that
           | resistance means they need to let go of fear or pain can get
           | caught in a loop of looking for emotional blocks where none
           | exist, rather than just educating themselves on the problem.
           | 
           | 'You aren't lazy, you just haven't done the necessary prep
           | and planning to make the thing you want to do feel
           | straightforward' might be just as useful advice.
        
             | gala8y wrote:
             | > Your read is much more benign.
             | 
             | I think I wanted to see more in this article. I think the
             | idea of acknowledging this part of us and seeing it as a
             | positive force is not conveyed clearly enough, but it's
             | there.
             | 
             | > 'You aren't lazy, you just haven't done the necessary
             | prep and planning to make the thing you want to do feel
             | straightforward' might be just as useful advice.
             | 
             | Yes. This would be a subset of "it's too difficult
             | (emotionally, organizationally, in terms of ability/skill)
             | for me to do all this stuff the way I never did before" -
             | emotions of discomfort arise (said 'Resistance') and boom,
             | you are back to square one (edit: ...of not doing things).
        
               | zepto wrote:
               | > and boom, you are back to square one.
               | 
               | What do you mean by back to square one?
        
             | naasking wrote:
             | > The article's set up is actually quite harmful and
             | disempowering. It identifies resistance as a bundle of
             | fears and pain to be overcome in order to be able to 'just
             | do' the thing you are trying to do
             | 
             | I didn't read that at all. The author is suggesting you
             | acknowledge and face those feelings and what they may be
             | trying to tell you about how you feel about your goals or
             | work.
             | 
             | Sometimes the fears are that your effort will be pointless
             | and unrewarded. In that case, assuming those fears are well
             | grounded, the author suggests rethinking your plans and not
             | necessarily trying to overpower your resistance.
             | 
             | That matches my experience in some cases, though obviously
             | not all.
        
             | [deleted]
        
           | joombaga wrote:
           | I'm sorry, I don't get it. I want to accomplish tasks.
           | "Internal resistance" is the label we're putting on the
           | mental phenomenon preventing me from doing so. It is
           | something I want to fight. When I do accomplish my tasks,
           | it's because my internal resistance is not there to fight
           | back. But if I had a way to fight it when it's there (e.g.
           | medication with manageable side effects) then I would use it.
           | I'd wield that weapon.
        
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