Post B0ZQCSDiUuQFpThPyy by morgan@sfba.social
 (DIR) More posts by morgan@sfba.social
 (DIR) Post #B0T7BGKSs1y6UVw7Ga by MorpheusB@aus.social
       2025-11-21T08:54:31Z
       
       4 likes, 4 repeats
       
       #Joke #HumourI had a call from a scammer the other dayMe: “Hello.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “Hello. This is Bob Bobson from Microsoft Support. We are seeing a lot of virus activity from your device.”    Me: “Oh no. My device? Are you sure?”    NOT-Microsoft support: “Oh yes, we have many reports.”    Me: “Oh jeez. How can I fix it?”>;  NOT-Microsoft support: “It’s OK sir. We can help you right now. Are you in front of your device sir?”    Me: “Yes. I was just about to use it. I’m glad you called.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “Yes sir, we are going to help you. Can you please push the Start button?”    Me: “I think it's already on.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “Okay, sir. Now you want to click on Control Panel.”    Me: “I don’t see that.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “Do you see a bunch of information above the Start button?”    Me: “Yes.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “That is your Control Panel.”    Me: “Wow, I didn’t realize it had a name.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “Yes sir, now press on Internet Options.”    Me: “Yeah, I definitely don’t see any Internet options. I don’t think I purchased that feature. This is just a cheap one.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “They all have the Internet sir. Press the Start button again.”    Me: “OK, it’s the same as before.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “That’s OK sir. We are going to restart your device. Can you please turn it off?”    Me: “Ummm…I don’t know how. I’ve never turned it off. Since I bought it, it just kind of stays on all the time.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “There must be an off button on your device. How do you stop it when it’s running?”    Me: “In those cases, I usually press the big button.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “OK sir. Please press that button.”    Me: “Ok.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “Is your device off?”    Me: “No. The door popped open.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “Door? Is there a disc inside the door?”    Me: “No, there’s a burrito.”    NOT-Microsoft support: “Why is there a burrito in your computer?”    Me: “Computer? I thought you said this was microwave support.”
       
 (DIR) Post #B0ZQCSDiUuQFpThPyy by morgan@sfba.social
       2025-11-21T18:56:48Z
       
       2 likes, 1 repeats
       
       @MorpheusB a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away I did tech support for a software company that sold products on "floppy" discs. Those disc drives had little latches you would flip down to secure the disc, and begin reading/writing. We called them "doors."I was on a call with a customer who was having a problem with their software. I asked them to put the floppy disc in the drive and close the door. I heard the phone placed on the desk, then footsteps, then the sound of a door closing, then footsteps, then the phone picked back up, and then, "OK, I've closed the door. Now what?"