Post AvKzwhayIyr2Fd2P0S by pixouls@post.lurk.org
(DIR) More posts by pixouls@post.lurk.org
(DIR) Post #AvKzwgPwgURMb8s5BI by pixouls@post.lurk.org
2025-06-20T23:53:01Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
Lately, I have been thinking about not expecting myself to be the same person every day and feeling like I'm breaking a "streak" if I don't do something. For all the good habits that are supposed to make me feel better, that are supposed to make life easier, I am somehow constantly feeling the burden of failure.
(DIR) Post #AvKzwhayIyr2Fd2P0S by pixouls@post.lurk.org
2025-06-20T23:54:18Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
Sometimes, I put off doing reviews because it means I'll end up with more of a backlog of doing my current notes, which I am already in a backlog of because of factors other than the review itself! While it's ok to create just for the sake of creating, it's not the same as holding guilt over myself for not accomplishing something perfectly every single day. Furthermore, I've transitioned to reminding myself about something that could be good for me to do every few days, rather than setting requirements to achieve them each day by a specific time. This rhythm feels more natural and manageable: I get chances to leverage my hyperfixation tendencies for good, and end up with a net positive overall. If they're all on my plate all the time: it's too much. If I never remind myself: i forget they exist or that they are options.
(DIR) Post #AvKzwiL3XdiYYYbCq0 by pixouls@post.lurk.org
2025-06-20T23:56:51Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
Ultimately, it's ok if I take a break from something that I do daily to take a week or more to review it before doing it again. I would rather internalize what I learn than keep doing it until I burn out. The review also doesn't need to be perfect, just enough so it doesn't feel like I'll have to start from zero when I pick things up again. It is also fine sometimes, to start from zero again and again, and rely on the residual knowledge to drive one forward. But I often find that my internal dialogue on the day to day is not the most reliable : P
(DIR) Post #AvL1t6YxjZosR8VhmC by pixouls@post.lurk.org
2025-06-21T00:17:29Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
Thinking about something @metasyn had told me in Feburary about how it is ok to just have the idea about something and also accept that you won't do it. not every idea needs to happen. Sometimes the sun shines on an idea more than usual. cool. sometimes it doesn't. sure. clouds are also cool. nature does intermittency all the time.
(DIR) Post #AvL28q9sUfg0ByHSBE by pixouls@post.lurk.org
2025-06-21T00:00:51Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
I get that sometimes people say that the most important time to do some of these uncomfortable practices like journaling is when you need them most, but that doesn't mean that it cannot take different forms in order to get you there. Otherwise, I find myself in a cycle of avoidance, where things are so bad, it's hard to give myself the space to externalize them and make them tangible, let alone in a manner that is in a highly structured 1000 word prompt. No one pays me to be more unhappy when I'm already unhappy, except for capitalism (in more unhappiness). It is ok for me to change my practices based on my needs, rather than relying on rigor and discipline to ground me.