Post AvKx0DAB5qqDABUFSy by RowanH@infosec.exchange
(DIR) More posts by RowanH@infosec.exchange
(DIR) Post #AvKwlw8paCucJj3Azw by futurebird@sauropods.win
2025-06-20T23:25:11Z
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If Tucker and Ted Cruz were fighting in a pit to the death, no weapons, who would win?
(DIR) Post #AvKwslss7O50X0qPzM by futurebird@sauropods.win
2025-06-20T23:26:28Z
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Ted Cruz bites when cornered, and has "throw the pregnant woman from the lifeboat so there's room for me" vibes.However Tucker is kind of a big guy, and has the laugh of serial killer.
(DIR) Post #AvKwxqkFTNLj3UETmS by jmax@mastodon.social
2025-06-20T23:27:18Z
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@futurebird - The American people. Even if they both live, at least they were doing something non-harmful for a while.
(DIR) Post #AvKwyfIhVYcJqojhQG by stevegis_ssg@mas.to
2025-06-20T23:27:27Z
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@futurebird America!
(DIR) Post #AvKwzlbrXKLhhwDxjM by mhoye@mastodon.social
2025-06-20T23:27:36Z
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@futurebird all of us.
(DIR) Post #AvKx0DAB5qqDABUFSy by RowanH@infosec.exchange
2025-06-20T23:27:40Z
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@futurebird The rest of us would be the winners no matter what the outcome of the fight.
(DIR) Post #AvKx1xe1lItDc2HbzE by futurebird@sauropods.win
2025-06-20T23:27:33Z
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@arrjay ... no comment
(DIR) Post #AvKxA1SHTiaJkOdI5w by lienrag@mastodon.tedomum.net
2025-06-20T23:29:28Z
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@futurebird The people.
(DIR) Post #AvKxQ9GUD3KgbOnzXs by shovemedia@triangletoot.party
2025-06-20T23:32:28Z
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@futurebird there’s a reason why those “sports” have weight classes
(DIR) Post #AvKxR8kjbCm1IsQVf6 by BruceMirken@mas.to
2025-06-20T23:32:38Z
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@futurebird if either one of them dies in this hypothetical, humanity is the winner.
(DIR) Post #AvKxlb8Jn73t7DDFSq by JamesWidman@mastodon.social
2025-06-20T23:36:20Z
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@futurebird [announcer voice]in this corner: Tucker "Ball-Tanner" Carlson!and in the other corner: Ted "Winter-Break" Cruz!
(DIR) Post #AvKy7UgcRNnxUYhIpM by liferstate@mas.to
2025-06-20T23:40:18Z
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@futurebird I think Tucker would bang his head into the sides of the pit so many times he'd get a concussion and be easy pickings for Ted. Ted would eat his corpse, get mad cow disease, and also die.
(DIR) Post #AvKyGfX3UBFDjfbCPw by ptoothfish@mastodon.nz
2025-06-20T23:41:54Z
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@futurebird "everyone else"
(DIR) Post #AvKyMrU9xN5uXtCJDU by i_give_u_worms@mastodon.cloud
2025-06-20T23:43:05Z
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@futurebird the American public would be the real winner either way
(DIR) Post #AvKyPHx4WhLhCzsW6i by martin_piper@mastodon.social
2025-06-20T23:43:32Z
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@futurebird they're cowards so they won't fight.
(DIR) Post #AvKyb6FpqJIcPAHpyq by jeffrizzo@sfba.social
2025-06-20T23:45:39Z
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@futurebird the rest of us would win, obvs.
(DIR) Post #AvL4LCEoQaqI3Pbla4 by australopithecus@mastodon.social
2025-06-21T00:50:00Z
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@futurebird Key piece of hidden information here: we rig the game to ensure they both lose.
(DIR) Post #AvL4f7qmS01qEns1iq by llewelly@sauropods.win
2025-06-21T00:53:36Z
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@futurebird "tucker" is a mysterious dish found at a pot luck in a small town in western Kansas. I don't know even know how it became someone's name, let alone who could whup in a fight.
(DIR) Post #AvL5d5jZRpQr375lfk by catmisgivings@stranger.social
2025-06-21T01:04:27Z
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@futurebird Cruz would take his family on a surprise vacation and avoid getting snatched up and put in a pitTucker would take a liking to being alone in his man-cave pit. As soon as he got bored of talking to himself, or sooner, he would light a fire, bang a drum, and try to see if he could grow facial hair
(DIR) Post #AvL5q3lU52gYhsAeHI by babelcarp@social.tchncs.de
2025-06-21T01:06:46Z
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@futurebird Ted Cruz is like the Robert Mitchum creepy-preacher character in Night of the Hunter.
(DIR) Post #AvLAoSWNZ6xyg9A4tU by futurebird@sauropods.win
2025-06-21T02:02:31Z
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@catmisgivings This is eerily accurate sounding. I can picture it. Unfortunately.
(DIR) Post #AvLYzAPRdurEaiYacC by bwebster@dice.camp
2025-06-21T06:33:21Z
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@futurebird looks like a lot of folks around here haven’t heard the conspiracy theory around Ted Cruz being the zodiac killer
(DIR) Post #AvLhqjqVQ95HTcGooS by Divorytaur@mastodon.social
2025-06-21T08:12:40Z
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@futurebird other… we would win… 😏
(DIR) Post #AvMVxwmaiQQfKp4PJo by JasonAnthonyGuy@mastodon.social
2025-06-21T17:34:15Z
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@futurebird Trick question. We all win.