Post AdO9korQCHIujUQaX2 by martinvermeer@fediscience.org
(DIR) More posts by martinvermeer@fediscience.org
(DIR) Post #AdNiuPYGS7VON6ogOO by twizzay@thisis.mylegendary.quest
2023-12-31T21:56:16.233915Z
3 likes, 5 repeats
I was on a flight today and I had to switch seats with someone so I could sit next to my wife and daughter. The person I switched with was totally fine with it. (I mean who would want to sit next to some random 2-year-old on a flight anyway. (Well, I would. (She's adorable.)))So one of the flight attendants hears this and I'm convinced she must just be the enemy of cheeriness because she swooped down on us with a furious determination to end our 2 player game of musical chairs. It sounded something like this:> If you guys are going to change seats you need to notify a flight attendant. > you cant just switch seats that puts the balance of the plane in jeopardy. > They balance out the plane according to the weight of the passengers using the luggage in the undercarriage if people switch seats it throws that whole thing off. > I will need to speak to the captain about this. And she does.While she is up there talking to the captain two dudes in front of us had the following conversation. > Did they take your weight when you ordered your ticket? > No. Did they take yours? > No. But, she's totally right. You know they got a guy down there with the luggage during the flight right? > What? > Yeah hes down there. Every time someone goes to the bathroom he has to run to the other end of the plane to keep it balanced or we crash.> …> Yep. And if it's a really big guy he has to like pick up weights and carry them. > Me: Yeah. They call them Weight Runners. Super important people. > (We sounded very convincing)The third guy totally bought this. It was hilarious. So anyway, the flight attendant comes back and just like totally ignores us. Doesnt even report back what the captain says. I don't even care though. We just convinced a guy that Weight Runners are real and they know when you go to the bathroom.
(DIR) Post #AdNrP0PGn4m6zoi0gq by SlicerDicer@bikeshed.party
2023-12-31T23:31:25.565806Z
1 likes, 1 repeats
@twizzay @feld Further proof Jesus is watching you poop. 💪💪
(DIR) Post #AdO9explvBIQpFre40 by eviloatmeal@ak.angelstrapped.com
2023-12-31T22:38:34.187088Z
1 likes, 1 repeats
@twizzay Most airframes actually have three weight runners. The first, or staff weight runner. Then there's a second, the junior weight runner, who runs the weights while the staff runner is on break. But in order for a weight runner to go to the break room, someone obviously has to counteract the shift in weight. So there's a relief runner who is just there for when the other weight runners have to move around.
(DIR) Post #AdO9k7xdhHjBgK0Rkm by HelenWheels@mastodon.online
2023-12-31T22:52:39Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay OMG was it Allegiant? I was on a flight and a toddler in the back was having an absolute meltdown while still at the gate. He was seated with Dad but wanted mom who was seated up front. Of course, everyone within 3 rows was willing to switch but the FA was like a prison warden saying everyone had to remain in their assigned seat because of "weight balancing". FA said no switching or we couldn't take off. Kid screamed until we took off and seat switch was finally allowed.
(DIR) Post #AdO9korQCHIujUQaX2 by martinvermeer@fediscience.org
2023-12-31T22:53:50Z
2 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay Ah. I think the British English expression for this is a 'jobsworth'. In Danish: skrankepave. In Finnish: viskaali.
(DIR) Post #AdO9tOug2S0sre2hSy by tidmarsh@heads.social
2023-12-31T23:31:41Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay I am thoroughly impressed with your perfectly closed, nested parentheses.Also, good story!
(DIR) Post #AdO9w42W6PKAzjyn5s by Ultraverified@mastodon.sdf.org
2024-01-01T00:50:09Z
1 likes, 1 repeats
@twizzay I was in a foul mood. But now I'm gonna grab some weights and start running!Thanks!
(DIR) Post #AdOAFWSQfYdUdLNVuy by twizzay@thisis.mylegendary.quest
2024-01-01T03:02:34.676110Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
Here's a pic of me waking up to the reactions of this post just now.
(DIR) Post #AdOAV4lDPiSHMla82K by seewolfDE@ieji.de
2024-01-01T01:39:17Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay Best story of the year 2023. Made my day.
(DIR) Post #AdOAV5kXjhVmQyH6cy by twizzay@thisis.mylegendary.quest
2024-01-01T03:05:24.875697Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
@seewolfDE Dang. Sorry 2023 sucked so much :laugh_cry:
(DIR) Post #AdOAYUCpGUuh9V7ero by marilyn@mathstodon.xyz
2024-01-01T02:00:41Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay Ugh. Petty authoritarians are the worst (but at least they sometimes inspire humorous anecdotes).
(DIR) Post #AdOAZ8u7wvJlNNgnui by nuncio@mstdn.social
2023-12-31T23:20:34Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
@martinvermeer @twizzay I think in US English it's known as 'shenanigans'
(DIR) Post #AdOAZ9jAt89PvhZZTs by zeborah@mastodon.nz
2024-01-01T01:49:43Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@nuncio Not quite. The conversation with the two guys is shenanigans, but the flight attendant is the jobsworth. I can't think of a US equivalent term (though I'm not a native-USEng speaker so look forward to hearing if there is one) but it's that person at the front desk who insists on you following the letter of the rule even though it's a stupid rule and it makes no difference to absolutely anyone except for proving how important their job is.@martinvermeer @twizzay
(DIR) Post #AdOAbr9AQZAfAg1BgG by teleclimber@social.tchncs.de
2024-01-01T02:18:55Z
1 likes, 1 repeats
@twizzay here's a story that will put weight and balance in perspective: a long time ago I flew on a DC 3 with about 12 other people. The pilot was someone we all knew, so when we got to cruise altitude we all got up and moved to the back of the cabin. Through the open cockpit door we saw him spinning the trim wheel. Then we crept to the front, and giggled as he trimmed again. The third time he finally turns around and flips us off and we all burst out laughing. That's how dramatic that got.
(DIR) Post #AdOAbzF8KGhGHUs45g by teleclimber@social.tchncs.de
2024-01-01T02:25:58Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay of course we wouldn't do that any time other than cruise. Doing this during takeoff or landing would be a terrible idea. And the DC 3 is a relatively big aircraft and there were only a dozen or so of us.Weight and balance is critically important not to screw up, but when you're talking about transport aircraft and a few people moving around it's nothing to get panicky about.I bet the captain and FO had a good laugh when the attendant asked them. Probably why she dropped it.
(DIR) Post #AdOAjfbFF9DNfusRdo by twizzay@thisis.mylegendary.quest
2024-01-01T03:08:03.979027Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
@teleclimber :at_jakeLaughingLOL:
(DIR) Post #AdOAotNHSMYlqQprrE by hensley@geekdom.social
2024-01-01T02:38:10Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay like the airplane is a canoe or something.
(DIR) Post #AdOAselnhJcNhx6EvQ by CStamp@mastodon.social
2023-12-31T23:04:00Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay I have never heard of people being given seat assignments based on weight. And I usually pre-book my actual seat.
(DIR) Post #AdOAsflTzyxSnFxV4K by celesteh@babka.social
2024-01-01T02:40:00Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@CStamp @twizzay I once took a small, single engine propeller plane to an island just off the coast of the main part of Ireland. We got weighed on check in and our seats were assigned accordingly.It was a very small plane.
(DIR) Post #AdOBobVjyMfYOcDeE4 by gavi@wandering.shop
2024-01-01T03:08:26Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay I want to run across planes aisle ways for a living that sounds like so much fun
(DIR) Post #AdPETehjOlrDEuUSKe by platypus@glammr.us
2024-01-01T01:47:37Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
@twizzay the only time I've heard anything reasonable is the tiny local flights I'm on -- nobody buys Premium Economy, then there's a big section of the plane empty.But even then it's literally just something like *flight attendant picks out 8 or 10 adults* and "please move to the middle to balance the plane"no weight checks, no forcing people to sit in one place or another, just a basic "let's put a bunch of averaged-out-size people broadly here"
(DIR) Post #AdPEThiuArZwbQ3w4u by mansr@society.oftrolls.com
2024-01-01T15:24:38Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
@platypus @twizzay I've been on fairly empty flights in smallish planes where the passengers were instructed not to move to better seats until after takeoff. That makes sense. Two people swapping seats being an issue does not.