Post AZy8GAkFVM8yGQo7Fo by wandering_soul@cdrom.tokyo
(DIR) More posts by wandering_soul@cdrom.tokyo
(DIR) Post #AZxr0SHMqZfYn7DZR2 by wandering_soul@cdrom.tokyo
2023-09-20T16:48:04.180492Z
2 likes, 1 repeats
I have been thinking about what I said last night. Going with the flow or pursuing what you want as two different things that cannot happen at the same time, I've had to ask myself for a while the matter of what I actually want. Beyond just finding a comfortable distance with other people, when I fully commit to picturing what I would do with her if I actually dated her, I find myself on a dead end. I think I don't know, I wouldn't know what that would entail beyond awkwardly going out. I just want to spend time with her, that's all I want, and maybe I should already be satisfied as is since I already have a good chance to meet her and greet her everyday. Is it too selfish to also include there "I want her to like me too"? It's definitely not something I have any power whatsoever on. I think I would probably like to hold her hand or hug her, even kiss her, but I can barely imagine that, I just know it's something I would like. The question then turns towards "How could I get that?", and like I said, I feel that's completely out of my own hands. Sometimes I wonder if I am allowed to want such a thing, since I don't know if she liked me and I don't get a word on it. I don't know. How do you make a girl like you? How do people reach and grab each other, touch and confidently know that it's ok to do so? I'm sure if I don't know yet it's because I set myself too far away from others where they assume I don't want any of it, they might believe I have no interest on it or am uncomfortable by them. Nobody taught me how to lean in to someone else physically, and all I have learned is how to playfully punch or kick other guys. Women are a mystery to me.
(DIR) Post #AZy7VOE3Z9GOSnRSSG by dejenol@cdrom.tokyo
2023-09-20T19:19:07.290727Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@wandering_soul Did you hit the crystal wall? Because it seems you can see what you want but for some reason you can't reach it, and this strange obstacle makes you wonder if it's a mistake to pursue what you desire. If that's the case, I can tell you that the wall is actually a maze, and the longer you stay still wondering about what you should do, the more it will grow around you in size and complexity. Also, don't force yourself through the wall because you feel anxious by the feeling of wasted time and missed opportunities. You can certainly cross the wall this way, but you'll be hurt and in no shape to continue for a while, so the maze will grow around you and you'll become even more lost.In this instance you can't follow the example of others, you'll have to find your own way through it. Yes, the clock is ticking and you can't stop moving, but it's ticking slower than what your mind makes you believe, so keep exploring and don't feel pity about your situation, just accept you'll face different kind of challenges.Now, regarding the girl, I can't give you any real dating advice since I'm a wizard myself, but if you just want to spend time with her you should aim for that and forget any other pretension. Think about something you want to share with her, maybe a place you like in town, a film or your favorite dish and ask her to join you. If she accepts you can get to know her better and feel more comfortable with her and you'll see how the walls begin to disappear. In any case, don't delay it too much, because you seem to have a good opportunity of personal growth in your hands and it could become a future regret if you let it go.
(DIR) Post #AZy8GAkFVM8yGQo7Fo by wandering_soul@cdrom.tokyo
2023-09-20T20:01:22.061106Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
I sometimes forget there's no set way to do things. I'm thinking I could do something today, ask her if she can talk. I might pussy out on it, but at least the idea helps me focus. My mind has been in disarray too much today, feeling that I have something I can do calms the doubts down.