Post AVUcQpltgogCWBjfw8 by vala@shitposter.club
(DIR) More posts by vala@shitposter.club
(DIR) Post #AVUHjQmgiYcHUD8FRg by feld@bikeshed.party
2023-05-09T18:57:23.629718Z
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Are surprise engagements appropriate?An aunt and uncle on my wife's side are having an anniversary party but it's actually a secret engagement party for their son who will propose to his girlfriend IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE EXTENDED FAMILYThis horrifies me
(DIR) Post #AVUHtgYqulRvJTYBBA by lain@lain.com
2023-05-09T18:58:42.119881Z
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@feld no way to tell without knowing the people involved
(DIR) Post #AVUZNOUQMn1tAqENaS by feld@bikeshed.party
2023-05-09T22:15:24.020258Z
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"all these people in this room who you know will hate you if you say no, so you better say yes" is how I read the situation.
(DIR) Post #AVUZSRB5ncXqxWarPU by Moon@shitposter.club
2023-05-09T22:16:29.992973Z
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@feld @lain what a nightmare for the girl
(DIR) Post #AVUZdVL4fY8f38XWD2 by feld@bikeshed.party
2023-05-09T22:18:06.106688Z
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a genuine reaction is impossible to have without privacy IMO
(DIR) Post #AVUa03vElnjUg8D8fQ by sim@shitposter.club
2023-05-09T22:22:37.835647Z
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@Moon @feld @lain It really depends. I think if she really likes him, she has been talking about marriage with him, then it could be a really nice surprise for her and something to remember and tell any children they have if they want children. If she doesn't like surprises or to be put on the spot around family though, then don't do it. Let her know in advance. Also keep in mind that these things used to happen and it was great to be able to involve the whole family and to get support from them as these things were intended.
(DIR) Post #AVUaf02m5vnUWTFzmK by feld@bikeshed.party
2023-05-09T22:29:30.705185Z
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my understanding is she's being completely blindsided by this
(DIR) Post #AVUbKiFycIuhWHK3No by sim@shitposter.club
2023-05-09T22:37:32.442534Z
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@feld @lain @Moon Yeah, that is concerning. How close are you to the son? Could you mention this to him to make sure that she is okay with surprises like this?
(DIR) Post #AVUcQpltgogCWBjfw8 by vala@shitposter.club
2023-05-09T22:35:02.565725Z
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@feld clicked wrong by skimming the post too quickly. hell to nah, id tip her off that something is about to happen
(DIR) Post #AVVChtPb0Mpx55joZs by lain@lain.com
2023-05-10T05:35:41.482061Z
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@Moon @feld again, i don't know the people involved, so i have no idea if it's appropriate or not. What if they have watched 20 romcoms with big gesture proposals before and she always said "oh i love those so much"? What if she has dropped hints that she wants him to propose for some time and he dragged his feet, now committing to her finally with a bang?