Post AGQkyDIhtfcbbeeEWe by LearnTribe@mastodon.social
(DIR) More posts by LearnTribe@mastodon.social
(DIR) Post #AGQkyCZgb3bpM1aHLs by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T06:27:56Z
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Gonna post a bunch of these A) to get them out B) because others might relate. * Wore noise cancelling earbuds till my ears literally bled.* Replaced with over ear noise cancelling headphones that rubbed my head raw. Now I put a piece of foam under the headband and I look like a budget cyberman all day.* Before noise cancelling headphones, only wore hoodies to use the hood for audio protection.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyDIhtfcbbeeEWe by LearnTribe@mastodon.social
2022-02-13T08:07:41Z
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@freedcreative I only discovered noise cancelling headphones after I started learning from the autistic community on birdsite.At that point I was struggling with burnout and needing answers (I was just considered depressed & wierd, not autistic), and couldn't cope going to supermarket due to sensory overload causing meltdown. Headphones meant I could still buy groceries.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyE25AxuxsNsTFg by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T08:51:13Z
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@LearnTribeThey're life changing magic aren't they. And I'm also now finally learning the difference in myself between burnout and depression, where before I thought it was all depression.Before noise cancelling for me it was ear damagingly loud music to drown everything else out.I just ordered these ear inserts called "Calm" that apparently modify sounds to relieve overload - 1/2
(DIR) Post #AGQkyEDmTTH8SfLoUC by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T06:34:07Z
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* Can't sleep with a bedside clock because the light is too bright.* Have to sleep with the door closed or LEDs in the next room keep me awake.* A single crinkle in a sheet wakes me up because it feels like a rock in a shoe.* Vocal sibilance, mouth sounds and clicking sounds are torture.* That one kitchen light is super loud but nobody else hears it.* If I need to wear one piece of tight clothing I have to fight off panic.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyEcF0WqDgWnLc0 by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T08:51:14Z
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while still letting you hear. I'll post if they're good. @LearnTribe - 2/2
(DIR) Post #AGQkyF4xHloH7aEHMu by LearnTribe@mastodon.social
2022-02-13T08:57:13Z
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@freedcreative My current headphones aren't completely noise cancelling, but they cut all the background hum and noise of a busy shop and dampen their tannoy music to tolerable. If it gets bad I connect my MP3 player and drown it out with my own music.Strange that I'm ok with my headphones playing music, but not the shop blasting the same song at me. I think it's because I'm subconsciously picking up all the echoes
(DIR) Post #AGQkyFZnR6TofEeuRM by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T09:10:46Z
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@LearnTribeI recently learned about the Gruen effect, and the fact supermarkets and shopping centres are deliberately designed to be confusing and stressful.They're set at just the right level of noise, light and layout that neurotypical people respond to the stress by buying more stuff.But for ND people with different sensory processing it goes past that "just enough" level - 1/2
(DIR) Post #AGQkyHJYyQgQ3T4yPo by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T09:10:47Z
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to be outright distressing. That's why it causes meltdowns for so many, because it's designed that way, on purpose.That's why your music works, because it cancels out some of the deliberately generated stress.Perfect example of NT focused design being disabling, not the ND person being otherwise disabled. @LearnTribe - 2/2
(DIR) Post #AGQkyIeA1KkmBdiw9w by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T06:39:12Z
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When I was younger:* "When you're walking along do you ever just touch all the plants and other surfaces just to see what the texture is like". *weird look*, "Um, nooooo"* Dissociating at dinner with a friend's boarding family who keep asking if I'm okay - "Guess I'm just really depressed"* Dissociating in my public facing hospitality job, colleagues keep asking if I'm okay - "Guess I'm just really depressed"
(DIR) Post #AGQkyKIbsQhfJNekqW by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T06:43:37Z
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* Keep having complete physical shut-downs when overwhelmed - "Guess I'm just really depressed"* Hides under table when overwhelmed.* Cannot abide any surface not being smooth. Will smooth it at any cost.* Cannot abide things not being symmetrical. Will align at any cost.* Spend life answering the question "What's your accent, where are you from?" despite never having left my home country.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyM0bWLUMc7FP3g by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T06:48:36Z
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* Everyone, absolutely everyone, describes me as either weird or different.* Gets told at about 22 that I always take the last thing a person has said and say it back to them. Realise it's true.* Always hear, "You always have something you're passionate about, I wish I had that"* Hears behind my back I'm overly fixated on said passions.* Always utterly shocked when someone reveals they're upset with me. Never understand why.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyNix8wYdvx0Kp6 by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T06:53:31Z
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* If I don't have something to keep my hands busy, I'll harm myself by scratching, picking, teeth clenching.* Told I was "gifted" as a kid. Realise looking back the other "gifted" kids were also clearly autistic.* Told as a kid I spoke like an adult, often called an "old soul".* Can smell or taste something "weird" in food others don't, that then gives them a stomach upset later.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyPQaoB3lDaQhU0 by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T06:58:18Z
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* Completely and totally terrified of the phone. Had to work a couple of phone heavy jobs and they were an absolute nightmare.* Almost drop dead if someone is at the door unannounced.* Start being extremely anxious if people don't arrive at the agreed upon time.* Always deep dive researching.* As a baby, skipped normal crawling and jumped straight from army crawl to walking - a little known early sign of autism.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyR7sUjHIU7gmae by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T07:02:50Z
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* When I made said jump, only did so in a scenario where the alternative was to get dirt and leaves on my hands.* Hyperlexic at a young age.* Eye contact while trying to speak feels like bees in my brain. Thought for years I just had a confidence problem.* Incapable of speaking without wild gesticulation.* Need two rest days minimum to recover from every one day spent in social contact.
(DIR) Post #AGQkySkYSPoHWMnBVw by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T07:08:07Z
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* Engineered my work to be from home via text and email only.* Still very anxious about whether I'm communicating as expected anyway.* Compulsively overshare, don't see what's wrong with it.* Info dump to people and see it as an act of affection. They may not recieve it as such.* Used to plan conversations in advance, mapping multiple branches to be prepared for maximum possibilities* Solved ^ by having very few conversations
(DIR) Post #AGQkyUUfyQISvhNX2e by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T07:14:44Z
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* Could never understand why friends wanted to go to noisy clubs where you can't even hear each other, when we could have sat home and had deep conversations.* Will 100% cross the street to avoid small talk with an acquaintance.* Regularly in a stunned silence in situations that demand small talk, drawing an absolute blank.* Must have senses "filled". If drawing, must listen to words. If writing, ambient sounds.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyWSGgLYj0oGdZA by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T07:39:57Z
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* The sound of whispering, or utensils scraping ceramic is also physically painful.* When overwhelmed, pushing out speech of any kind is very difficult. It's like the feeling of trying to eat something when you are very full, but inverted. Like a constriction in the throat, and words take on a tangible weight.* I am very put out by the need to change clothes and spend time on things like self care when I am deep into something.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyY7mTUMMBqhIuW by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T07:44:26Z
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* Things being out of place upsets me. Not all things, not other people's things, just the ones to which I have allocated a place. They need to be in those places, in their correct position and orientation.* I do like my food to be separated. I don't get upset if it touches, but I will take the time to seperate it before eating so I can adequately plan my eating sequence. Separate small dishes preferred.
(DIR) Post #AGQkyZoMCg0jQBcoue by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-13T08:04:03Z
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* I develop systematic processes for anything that gets repeated. I do not just "make toast and tea", I execute the toast and tea process. * A couple of weeks ago I spilled my tea near the end of executing the process, and I short circuited. I stood, stuck, in the kitchen repeating "I don't know what to do" until my partner snapped me out of it by telling me to start over. He rebooted me then I was fine. It was funny tho.
(DIR) Post #AGRDIhSiGTHvesswVc by urusan@fosstodon.org
2022-02-13T15:22:36Z
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@freedcreative @LearnTribe By the way, my wife has the sensory processing traits that make this experience distressing. She hates shopping in person and only started buying the groceries when curbside pickup became normal.While I have other autistic traits, I have none of the sensory processing traits, so shopping is not a distressing activity for me.
(DIR) Post #AGRENuR1YktbIL8vtw by urusan@fosstodon.org
2022-02-13T15:33:42Z
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@freedcreative @LearnTribe So, despite having other autistic traits, I'm more easily able to cope with them when I'm not getting jammed by the neurotypical environment all the time.
(DIR) Post #AGSvbP4y7svjJgZKaG by freedcreative@merveilles.town
2022-02-14T11:13:29Z
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@urusan @LearnTribe That's very fortunate. It's excellent when you can use your strengths to support one another.In our partnership I handle clients, which though solely through text is still harder for my partner than me. And he does all the driving as I never got my license, which I now can finally articulate as being because driving is sensory overload for me.