Post ABgzO2eJDB4BXs4LWC by sleepwalker@spinster.xyz
(DIR) More posts by sleepwalker@spinster.xyz
(DIR) Post #ABdFa5i2tJytBVm14q by 22lemons@spinster.xyz
2021-09-22T21:22:59.316867Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
I just don't understand when fellow straight radfems say they could never remain single all their life due to loneliness. Any loneliness would be better than being stuck with a man who will never be able to comfort and love you wholeheartedly. Learn to enjoy your own company and accept that life is great even without romance.
(DIR) Post #ABdGkjYtfwrRdQ8J84 by Clariana@spinster.xyz
2021-09-22T21:37:20.693987Z
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@22lemons Its good you begin by saying you don't understand us, because it's very clear you don't. I hated being on my own, even though I am not particularly fond of people, and I don't think it is something that can be learned.
(DIR) Post #ABdH0MgAWLRNIZzIUi by sub_aetha@spinster.xyz
2021-09-22T21:39:13.813364Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@Clariana @22lemons That’s why I have a cat.
(DIR) Post #ABf2JQuTu9IuvUEj8C by Furball@spinster.xyz
2021-09-23T05:23:57.451647Z
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@22lemons do they not have any female friends??🤯
(DIR) Post #ABf2JROy4ngsS2V4eO by 22lemons@spinster.xyz
2021-09-23T07:32:57.516295Z
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@Furball They do but don't value platonic relationships as much as romantic. A part of me can't blame them because straight women are told from an early age that their primary goals in life are to marry and have children so that would become a priority. Doesn't give them the right to treat their friends badly tho
(DIR) Post #ABf2JRtSFS4pyalQAa by Gnomeshatecheese@spinster.xyz
2021-09-23T08:50:54.983707Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@22lemons Some people can’t get the same closeness from a friendship, as they can from a partner relationship. Whether this is due to temperament or how they grew up I don’t know, but it’s also irrelevant as it seems pretty much unchangeable as an adult. For someone like that, it’s a question of emotional boundaries. A friend is not the same thing as a partner and that’s just the way it’s going to be, because those boundaries are found to be extremely important. That doesn’t mean these people are determined to not be single. Some are, some aren’t. I personally was settled to the prospect of never having a close relationship with another person, but then that’s probably due to my personality traits. Make no mistake though, my choice was to either partner up, or never have a very close personal relationship, regardless of how many friends I had. And I’m sure I’m not the only one like that. @Furball
(DIR) Post #ABgzO1BudGl31Vm9cO by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-23T17:51:26.328489Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@Gnomeshatecheese not trying to disparage anybody here but a lot of people struggle to understand that others are not like them. Conservatives do it; they don’t get that some people aren’t happy in heterosexual marriages with children. And then there are radfems who think straight women should simply get used to singlehood.Radfems doing it almost bothers me more because they have fought hard for women to have choices. Surely it should make sense that women are individuals and want different things?
(DIR) Post #ABgzO1jac3hEhxX36u by sleepwalker@spinster.xyz
2021-09-23T18:10:51.621265Z
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@AbolishPregnancy @Gnomeshatecheese actual radfems were social constructionists and saw man-loving as a conditioning that women could and had to overcome if they want to be free because it's essential for male supremacy. Queers however fought hard to frame it as inborn and unchangeable condition... Because it's essential for male supremacy. Unfortunately they succeeded and now "radfems" will kill for the choice and the right to love their enemy.
(DIR) Post #ABgzO2CItIfI90xyro by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-23T19:50:30.670162Z
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@sleepwalker @Gnomeshatecheese :blobfoxdisapprove:
(DIR) Post #ABgzO2eJDB4BXs4LWC by sleepwalker@spinster.xyz
2021-09-23T20:17:45.668343Z
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@AbolishPregnancy @Gnomeshatecheese yes, act like I'm the crazy one when you (and by extension everyone else) don't even know where the ideas you believe in came from and what was feminism like just several decades ago
(DIR) Post #ABgzO3CLAeHxFPzWYy by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T00:24:42.345157Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@sleepwalker @Gnomeshatecheese are you saying that it is not women’s right to be in a relationship with whatever consenting adult they want?
(DIR) Post #ABgzO3ddXA7gc4lK6q by Gnomeshatecheese@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T08:30:41.405954Z
3 likes, 0 repeats
@AbolishPregnancyShe seems to be saying that sexual orientation is not innate, but learned. Possibly also, that women have a political obligation to examine their heterosexuality and to unlearn it. It is a foundational difference in views, one which I tend to see as insurmountable. @sleepwalker
(DIR) Post #ABgzOdCxHqAevkYWWG by FemaleIsNotAFeeling@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T11:08:38.173640Z
3 likes, 0 repeats
@GnomeshatecheeseStrange, this is almost verbatim the definition of "genital preferences" that the TRAs push. They say sexual orientation is a learned social construct and that people are indoctrinated with heterosexuality and need to re-examine their hetero indoctrination.This is how they try to convince lesbians to suck dick. Sexual attraction is not a choice. If it was, there wouldn't be a straight woman alive.@AbolishPregnancy @sleepwalker
(DIR) Post #ABh09NqWDfl6tfM2Wu by EmmyNoether@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T11:32:46.983058Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Gnomeshatecheese @AbolishPregnancy @sleepwalker Yes, FemaleIsNotAFeeling - the existence of female heterosexuality is indeed sad, but irrefutable, proof that sexuality is innate. 😂 No sane woman would waste her time on relationships with men if it wasn’t. (I say that as a straight woman whose sex drive has indeed led me to waste far too many years of my life with men! Not even nasty abusive ones. Just your bog standard relatively okay but socially conditioned selfish Nigels who nevertheless think they are the pre-Copernican earth around which your sun should revolve.)
(DIR) Post #ABh1CI1IRBN1eNLT04 by Furball@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T14:43:26.944997Z
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@AbolishPregnancy @sleepwalker That's a weird comment, coming from ms "Abolish pregnancy"
(DIR) Post #ABh1CIVmbpkzAvboWG by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T16:39:11.055072Z
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@Furball Women have the right to become pregnant and give birth. I believe the dependence on pregnancy must be ended by accessible artificial wombs, and that pregnancy should be recognized as an unethical and violent use of a human being.
(DIR) Post #ABh1CIyUt4j2bz2kHA by Moonbuggy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:01:52.592626Z
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@AbolishPregnancy @Furball @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Gnomeshatecheese @AbolishPregnancy @22lemons Are we forgetting that we are mammals? It's kind of like telling mares not to be with stallions or she-wolves not to be with he-wolves. There are lots of behaviors we don't like about the opposite sex but it would be ridiculous to claim that the desire to have sex and procreate is something that is purely a matter of choice with no biological basis. In other words, innate.innateĭ-nāt′, ĭn′āt″adjective1. Existing naturally or by heredity rather than being learned through experience.2. Of or produced by the mind rather than learned through experience.3. Possessed as an essential characteristic; inherent.The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, 5th Edition.
(DIR) Post #ABh3p3MT4TCXODrMTw by 22lemons@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:27:47.880414Z
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@Moonbuggy Then I must be a freak of nature because I have no such desires no matter how 'innate' it might be
(DIR) Post #ABh3p3nlQz2GksdA1o by Moonbuggy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:31:17.550958Z
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@22lemons That's fine, but clearly human beings reproduce. So say we "choose" our sexual orientation is exactly the same argument as Trans Activists.
(DIR) Post #ABh49SgkcC4BjS4vDs by Moonbuggy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:34:59.380390Z
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@22lemons @Furball @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Gnomeshatecheese @AbolishPregnancy That's fine, but clearly human beings reproduce. So say we "choose" our sexual orientation is exactly the same argument as Trans Activists.A large majority of women have at least one child by the age of 40-44 so having an expectation that women live without men isn't realistic.
(DIR) Post #ABh4uupJod0MbyiJ1s by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:41:18.187722Z
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@Moonbuggy @22lemons @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Furball @Gnomeshatecheese women’s desire to self-harm and men’s desire to hurt women for procreative purposes may be biological on some level, but it can be overcome, just as can the urges to overeat or have sex with a stranger.I have no problem with heterosexual relationships in themselves, I only recognize pregnancy as abusive.
(DIR) Post #ABh4uvMHq3NOGE8dPs by Moonbuggy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:43:33.676848Z
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@AbolishPregnancy @22lemons @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Furball @Gnomeshatecheese I have been pregnant 4 times and didn't experience it as abusive.
(DIR) Post #ABh5VUI5RG1p1gbn6m by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:48:02.432347Z
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@Moonbuggy @22lemons @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Furball @Gnomeshatecheese Women in BDSM relationships or employed as sex workers or who have to put up with TIMs in the locker room don’t necessarily feel they’re being abused.
(DIR) Post #ABh5VUrBKm6KmX1ooK by Moonbuggy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:50:10.512575Z
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@AbolishPregnancy @22lemons @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Furball @Gnomeshatecheese I find it pretty offensive that you are comparing me choosing to get pregnant with a man I love and raising a family together to BDSM or self-harm. I am clearly here because I support single-sex spaces.
(DIR) Post #ABh9PliM91Fz8zQMzY by AileenWuornos@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T18:08:31.253052Z
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@Moonbuggy @22lemons @AbolishPregnancy @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Furball @Gnomeshatecheese 'the majority' isn't always right and correct..I might believe your mindless perception of women being animals with regards to repop, which is also a terrible argument.."oh, but I'm a mammal so I couldn't possibly make a correct informed decision as to what enters my vagina!" The idea for sex just suddenly..*popped* into my mind! I refuse to believe there isn't any disturbance from outer forces, our mothers WARN us if they're nice enough because males rape..We're forced to mix with males at school and sometimes at home, so I suppose when you say it would be impossible, what you're saying is, we have NO OTHER CHOICE than to have to mix with them, "aww, shucks, I mean, you gotta have sex with them, it's natuuralll!"..bleeting on like a sheep..I don't think I made an informed to mix with males as part of a "pack reproduction" process.You actually sound disturbing..LOL
(DIR) Post #ABh9PmGO6UTkqXLY2K by Moonbuggy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T18:33:54.837703Z
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@AileenWuornos I definitely didn't say that human beings are animals. I was referring to those arguing that women's sexual desire for men or desire to have children is purely social and chosen with the assumption that our bodies and biology are irrelevant. This is exactly the arguments that the likes of Judith Butler use. I never implied I had a "mindless perception of women". The point is why many women chose to be with men and have families are complex and include biological factors. You can chose to do differently but if you create a feminist theory that denies an experience that most women have (heterosexual relationships, pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding and raising children) you are ignoring a majority experience. I did not refer to male violence or the abuse of men other than to say that I found comparing BDSM and self-harm to pregnancy was offensive.If you had taken just a couple of minutes to check my feed and history on this site you would know what my views on women, women's rights and male violence, coercion and abuse are. You are talking in hyperbole which is unhelpful and distorts the point I was making.@22lemons @AbolishPregnancy @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Furball @Gnomeshatecheese
(DIR) Post #ABhAoVsaFux3E5ZTaS by AileenWuornos@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T18:36:16.147499Z
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@Moonbuggy @22lemons @AbolishPregnancy @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Furball @Gnomeshatecheese ' large majority of women have at least one child by the age of 40-44 so having an expectation that women live without men isn't realistic.'..Who the hell said anything about LIVING with the fuckers..Let me correct the second sentence..The expectation that women *can have children without men's sperm isn't realistic*..Yep, oh and you're right about humans reproducing too..You seem to put more emphasis on women neding men being present than simply 'needing' them to procreate with..I knew of many mothers who covered the role perfectly without a male present.
(DIR) Post #ABhAoWJAf4DcYY0i1o by Moonbuggy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T18:49:38.094097Z
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@AileenWuornos @22lemons @AbolishPregnancy @EmmyNoether @FemaleIsNotAFeeling @Furball @Gnomeshatecheese Good for them. That is their choice, just as it is my choice to decide to live with the father of my kids. We know there are many conditions, suitations and cultures which have taken agency away from women about whether they live with men or not, I am not denying that. Women like me exist. I am happy with my male partner and we make a life together. We chose to have kids. If you don't want it or don't agree with it fine, but heterosexual couples partnering up, having kids and choosing to stay together isn't going away.Not once did I refer to "women needing men" that is your own interpretation.
(DIR) Post #ABhE5yTxSpriio4R6W by 22lemons@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T19:13:46.450527Z
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@Moonbuggy 'If you don't want it or don't agree with it fine' just stop right there. You are wasting your time speaking positively about a stance that most of society already deems acceptable. And wasting our time by speaking positively about men. There's plenty of that on the rest of the internet and I'm not on spinster to hear yet another woman praise a man. Women that aren't like you also exist.
(DIR) Post #ABhE5z0DWtfaKrACO0 by Moonbuggy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T19:26:24.631318Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@22lemons I am not "praising" men. I am talking about women and our desires and what we want. I never said women who have no interest or desire to be with men in any shape or form don't exist.I am saying if you tell women that our having sex with men, having children (50% of whom are male) and choosing to stay with men is unacceptable when organizing for women’s and girls' rights how is that constructive? You are being very hostile to me just for saying I choose to be with a man for example. Even though I am from an extended family of working-class women who have always fought for our rights.
(DIR) Post #ABhYEZS9tAsMmjbaPw by FemaleIsNotAFeeling@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T11:35:59.811107Z
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@EmmyNoetherThat's why this book exists!@AbolishPregnancy @Gnomeshatecheese
(DIR) Post #ABhYEa45c9DWgNLsXY by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T16:41:41.904907Z
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@FemaleIsNotAFeeling @EmmyNoether @Gnomeshatecheese oh 🤢Just stop hating people for things they can’t control. You’ll be happier.
(DIR) Post #ABhYEaVNyf3G327g5Q by FemaleIsNotAFeeling@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T16:46:48.608570Z
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@AbolishPregnancyWhat the hell are you talking about?@EmmyNoether @Gnomeshatecheese
(DIR) Post #ABhYEazs9JRDZaO1bc by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:24:27.480338Z
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@FemaleIsNotAFeeling @EmmyNoether @Gnomeshatecheese title of the book? Why hate an entire group of people?
(DIR) Post #ABhYEbQ6ZmQCsweyUi by FemaleIsNotAFeeling@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:30:31.116720Z
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@AbolishPregnancy That's a rhetorical question that doesn't need an answer. We all know why a lot of women hate a lot of men. @EmmyNoether @Gnomeshatecheese
(DIR) Post #ABhYEbtAphfqL6GBns by AbolishPregnancy@spinster.xyz
2021-09-24T17:45:43.615546Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
@FemaleIsNotAFeeling @EmmyNoether @Gnomeshatecheese hate violent men, hate any violent people, that’s fine.Hating *all* men regardless of what they’ve done gets us nowhere. It’s counterproductive as it discourages women who might agree with us on actual issues. And it’s self-centered, because women need a refuge from misogyny. They aren’t likely to find comfort in radfem spaces if the first thing they see is people calling their friends and male family members inherently evil.