Post 9uCHWvhUHEbdcsFbvs by jautero@mstdn.social
(DIR) More posts by jautero@mstdn.social
(DIR) Post #9uCEqF0GQxkX8GYAqG by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T08:52:56Z
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Had a weird night with a lot of realizations.
(DIR) Post #9uCEy9ApzXMBMxGXLs by 11112011@freespeechextremist.com
2020-04-19T08:54:26.567179Z
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@Gina >I'm alive and i even have a head still....
(DIR) Post #9uCEzp6Va7glhe2Y2i by nvsr@best-friends.chat
2020-04-19T08:54:35Z
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@Gina life really do be like that these days.
(DIR) Post #9uCFFEXTIVhWvp049o by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T08:57:30Z
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@11112011 damn *mind blown*
(DIR) Post #9uCFI4ZKp1lesZE2Uq by 11112011@freespeechextremist.com
2020-04-19T08:58:02.632806Z
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@Gina its the times dont worry
(DIR) Post #9uCGGubYU0nfdlH4ds by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T09:08:56Z
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Realization 1: had a sort of relationship with someone that wasn't meant to be. Ending it was painful and now I walk around feeling sad and empty and being constantly reminded of someone I loved.Realization 2: jfc I'm fatRealization 3: I'm still so fucking burned out. Ever since December I've been pulling energy god knows where, trying to push myself to be productive, but it's just gone. Every little task is a mountain. This isn't sustainable.
(DIR) Post #9uCHOR9bxoy6ZUM86S by InternetKevin@mastodon.cloud
2020-04-19T09:21:27Z
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@Gina It's Sunday. Have a nap. It will help you feel better.
(DIR) Post #9uCHTekeptWUBvAmBs by nvsr@best-friends.chat
2020-04-19T09:22:26Z
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@Gina 1. Why isn't this like all the romantic movies with happy endings?! It's not fair. 2. same 3. why is therapy so expensive 😭
(DIR) Post #9uCHWvhUHEbdcsFbvs by jautero@mstdn.social
2020-04-19T09:22:59Z
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@Gina Fatness is like an astrological sign. We put a lot of focus on it when finding a partner, but in reality it is just a bunch of made-up nonsense.
(DIR) Post #9uCJI8GfT9MYASmIgC by sexybiggetje@mastodon.social
2020-04-19T09:42:42Z
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@GinaIt's cliche, but those are just feelings! You're a good person and don't let your brain convince you otherwise
(DIR) Post #9uCK6yogMvQzcivyIy by bekopharm@social.tchncs.de
2020-04-19T09:51:55Z
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@Gina Dunno about 1 but 2 and 3 sound familiar. Workouts are tasks too and it's so freakin hard to get into some sort of exercise routine again at all.
(DIR) Post #9uCKBzsfq4PyNAC3Ci by ericbuijs@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T09:52:45Z
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@Gina From what I'm reading you're pushing yourself too hard both in your professional and personal live. I have been struggling with the same issue (and it's still a pitfall for me). What helped me (in a nutshell) was to cut off as many distractions as I could and focus on one thing that I really wanted to do. At the time it also meant that I had to give up my job and start doing something different but looking back it was worth it.
(DIR) Post #9uCKKK5yZ7elNqNxZo by pedro@social.linux.pizza
2020-04-19T09:54:16Z
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@Gina every person has different methods. I can’t think properly and in an non-negative way unless I do a minimum 1h walk before without a clear path defined. That being said, your insights seem balanced.
(DIR) Post #9uCKeb6T2Xw9vNHbMG by ajz@social.linux.pizza
2020-04-19T09:57:59Z
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@Gina Kudos for sharing this. 1) Love is a word which is used a lot, in pop songs, in movies, and less often maybe in real life. In my opinion the word is too often used for things that it is not. Real love is unconditional, without desire, without possession. From personal experience I believe that it can be rewarding to rethink, re-feel and redefine the word love. I prefer to use words like compassion and empathy instead. [1/2]
(DIR) Post #9uCKtxAdHEvkhyYN1M by thewk@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T10:00:46Z
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@Gina I was in a very similar place years ago, except for part 1, I was burnt out to the point of really having to force myself out of bed in the morning, I basically spent my days on autopilot and haven't had a relationship for over 3 years then. I also was heavily overweight. For me it was leaving the company that ended it. Hope you find your solution too and soon. Keep you head up, things will get better
(DIR) Post #9uCL4ogTAbHXZbcna4 by ajz@social.linux.pizza
2020-04-19T10:02:45Z
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@Gina 2) I'm getting fatter through and I don't like it very much but I know cool people who are fat, and that makes it pretty bearable for myself. 3) After the winter is gone I finally have more energy. And since I started to use to-do list software that I really like I have been gradually more productive ... finally. :linux: 🧗 🐱
(DIR) Post #9uCLChDeo7n2jquC3s by djsumdog@hitchhiker.social
2020-04-19T10:04:02Z
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@ajz @Gina Empathy is more about understanding someone else's pain, even if that's outside one's own experiences. The concept of unconditional love is seen a lot in religion as an ideal we aspire to, yet it's not something we can really achieve (at least not easily). Love may be more like a resource. I wrote about this a while back:https://battlepenguin.com/philosophy/perspective/does-love-really-conquer-all-or-is-love-a-finite-resource/..and I've also touched on Empathy before as well:https://battlepenguin.com/philosophy/people/race-to-the-bottom/
(DIR) Post #9uCNHHKMhRyjnDM7JA by jotbe@chaos.social
2020-04-19T10:27:24Z
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@Gina Thank you for sharing. That sucks and I hope, you feel better soon.
(DIR) Post #9uCNk6yYGavc5KtwXo by letterus@kirche.social
2020-04-19T10:32:33Z
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@Gina Thank you for sharing. Sound really bad regarding point 1 and 3. I don‘t know if you care, but I‘ll do a prayer for you. 🙏🏼Please don‘t hesitate to get professional support, I think that‘s important.
(DIR) Post #9uCNq8MY1Skk7lzsES by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T10:33:45Z
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@ericbuijs If I may ask, did you find a similar job or was it a career switch?
(DIR) Post #9uCNuyHyu5M4KUASlU by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T10:34:36Z
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@thewk after leaving the company, did you do the same work elsewhere or did you make a career switch?
(DIR) Post #9uCNyImFBZxojzuXXE by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T10:35:15Z
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@thewk If I may ask, after leaving the company, did you do the same work elsewhere or did you make a career switch? Also, how did it go with the weight?
(DIR) Post #9uCPbGEgfShi6iM8Ku by rtn@social.weho.st
2020-04-19T10:53:21Z
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@Gina I feel you. Want any attempts of advice at all?
(DIR) Post #9uCQJwyX7nGJP36rMu by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:01:33Z
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@rtn Sure, why not. :)
(DIR) Post #9uCR3qJqClku4zxY48 by ericbuijs@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:09:49Z
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@Gina Total career switch. It pays much less but I'm a happy man nowadays.
(DIR) Post #9uCRDkyUvh6aOthggK by newt@stereophonic.space
2020-04-19T11:11:43.136190Z
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@Gina you don't look fat.
(DIR) Post #9uCSf2NiQ54q9x4TwG by rtn@social.weho.st
2020-04-19T11:27:44Z
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@Gina Try to be kind to yourself and fix the burnout shit first. It takes time. Then fix the rest :)
(DIR) Post #9uCSh1xQxzjVQLjFBo by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:27:46Z
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@newt all my pants are tight 💔
(DIR) Post #9uCSr28X9j0MsJgrZI by 11112011@freespeechextremist.com
2020-04-19T11:30:01.650412Z
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@Gina @newt this is just an extreme case of lack of mirrors
(DIR) Post #9uCSwH9UkvsotPdigi by randynose@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:30:54Z
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@ericbuijsGina, you haven't been happy with your current job for some time. Perhaps it's time to start something new? @Gina
(DIR) Post #9uCSzB7bdLKD3g8kjY by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:31:24Z
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@randynose @ericbuijs I think so too. The question is what.
(DIR) Post #9uCT81NVEHeXRfnBaq by oranje@cybre.space
2020-04-19T11:32:57Z
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@Gina The wound is fresh but time heals a broken heart. Be careful not to rebound into another relationship that can do more harm. You're beautiful(I've seen pictures that prove it). You're also smart and very talented. You've accomplished some amazing feats. Seems like the hardest person on you is you. FWIW, I'm a Gina fan.Turn down the heat on the pressure cooker before it explodes.
(DIR) Post #9uCTAdUWUpWgEMK51k by duponin@udongein.xyz
2020-04-19T11:33:33.134537Z
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@Gina @newt just buy regular shape pants?I mean to have under sized clothes isn't really sane, it mentally tricks you to think you're fat even if you aren't
(DIR) Post #9uCTBPxwGlZoZUSFXc by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:33:37Z
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@oranje thank you ❤️
(DIR) Post #9uCTLtR7YLXmrw6DdA by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:35:29Z
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@duponin @newt they were loose just a few months ago 😂😭
(DIR) Post #9uCTitrK9DoAq9KHS4 by jordan31@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:39:39Z
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@Gina @newt agreed I don't think you are. Also nothing wrong with thick. A lot of men prefer it. I would just do what you want in your personal time. If that's watching 10hours solid of Nailed It while eating pickles, go for it. Sometimes you got to just chill and relax.
(DIR) Post #9uCTsc1PJzZWPkfpkO by oranje@cybre.space
2020-04-19T11:41:23Z
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@Gina You're very welcome. I've been burned out for years, maybe decades. I had people depending on me to keep a roof over there heads and food on the table. I had no choices or options or so it seemed. I've worked my life away. Don't fall into that trap. You're young and nobody's depending on you. You're free to make mistakes and have time to recover. There's less pressure than it seems.
(DIR) Post #9uCTwGTvLgfSldknZY by jordan31@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:42:08Z
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@Gina @newt also, no judging on my choice of TV snack food and my choice of TV shows lol. Nailed it is almost up there with supernatural.
(DIR) Post #9uCTxkBKPUSRAblFMO by newt@stereophonic.space
2020-04-19T11:42:26.286369Z
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@Gina so maybe instead of being upset you should buy new pants, don't you think?
(DIR) Post #9uCU2Ml0vewHy6emgq by Gina@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:43:11Z
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@jordan31 @newt “If that's watching 10hours solid of Nailed It while eating pickles, go for it.”Oddly specific, but so accurate.
(DIR) Post #9uCU4dhgtT3p6dBcaO by ericbuijs@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:43:37Z
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@Gina To answer that I had to separate what I wanted to do and what I thought other people wanted me to do. That was surprisingly hard because I kept confusing these two (if that makes sense).@randynose
(DIR) Post #9uCU9OQt69u5Bwarqq by oranje@cybre.space
2020-04-19T11:44:17Z
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@Gina You're very welcome. I've been burned out for years, maybe decades. I had people depending on me to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table. I had no choices or options or so it seemed. I've worked my life away. Don't fall into that trap. You're young and nobody's depending on you. You're free to make mistakes and have time to recover. There's less pressure than it seems.
(DIR) Post #9uCUWBMTrWxTJSOnei by duponin@udongein.xyz
2020-04-19T11:48:39.193183Z
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@Gina @newt welp ^^'I'm sure that more complex that just being "fat"And I'm also sure you aren't fat. You may have some extras Kg but that's isn't an issue itself
(DIR) Post #9uCV8pbufMxp9A2xMG by thewk@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:55:33Z
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@Gina After I left that company I was unemployed for a couple of months, wasn‘t the kind if material one would have wanted as an employee. My old school friends got me through the worst part by always taking me out and also forcing me into sports. Thats how the weight got away. After a while I took the money I made and bought about half of a friends company who was struggling. I lead that company since then
(DIR) Post #9uCVBrVi3hhxuMaen2 by jordan31@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T11:56:06Z
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@Gina @newt haha. Everyone has their vices. Today might be YouTube videos and animal crackers.
(DIR) Post #9uCXUHj9WX5oL4n4ee by lopeztel@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T12:21:48Z
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@Gina Sounds like you've been having it tough lately, take care of yourself. Everyone needs to blow off some steam every now and then, do what you have to.
(DIR) Post #9uCZUyOZ5LFWZzcIOe by ndegruchy@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T12:44:19Z
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@Gina Hey!I am with you. Being burnt out just drains energy from everything. The fact that you’re still feeling the end of your last relationship is just compounding the issue. The hard decision, now, seems to be the way forward into something that helps you. You keep mentioning Spain as a possibility. While I am only scarcely able to imagine leaving my home country, it seems like you are ready to move.We all care about you!
(DIR) Post #9uCZmVxZXu81bLM6NM by ndegruchy@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T12:47:37Z
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@Gina Also: appearance is temporary; Your sassy wit that brightens our day is eternal! Show your depression that Gina is absolutely not to be fucked with. You got this. 😤💯😎
(DIR) Post #9uCZwEP1g5mq2opWkK by le_ArthurDent@mastodon.social
2020-04-19T12:49:15Z
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@Gina I didn't read all the answers but I am afraid you should consider that this is not just a "losing energy" burn-out but a depression. This can come hand in hand and I want to suggest you to look for someone (professional) to get out of this downward spiral...
(DIR) Post #9uCa5DzSa2tFN79zMm by randynose@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T12:50:55Z
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@Gina @ericbuijs Didn't you want to get into woodworking or something like that? Take a position in whatever field you think you'd enjoy, so long as you're able to pay your bills. I'm 56 and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. But the most fun job I had was working at a Pizza Parlor in high-school. Sure it was also a great time in my life, but I enjoyed making people happy with the food I cooked.
(DIR) Post #9uCaN0mUQktlcIZhmi by thewk@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T12:54:08Z
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@Gina Thinking about it a bit more, what really pulled me out was that I can see a purpose in what I am doing now. Producing software that helps kids and young adults learn something and enabling them to grow is way better than helping some multinational company save a couple more millions be replacing a job by using IT. The rest helped for sure, but finding something to do that has meaning certainly was key....After that, it got better by itself..
(DIR) Post #9uCutISkDzPMny0lZg by ericbuijs@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T16:44:08Z
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@randynose One of the most satisfying jobs I had was working in a small hardware store when I was a student. Helping people with their projects, selling tools and hardware. I had a great time and never had one meeting. 😜
(DIR) Post #9uD9i3bUczp8qdCa9o by datenteiler@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T19:30:03Z
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@Gina My trick is to buy pants one or two sizes bigger. Since then, everyone's asking me if I've lost weight. 😊 And no, you're not fat maybe you just miss to boulder?
(DIR) Post #9uDCyqiI6guzee52p6 by jlin@fosstodon.org
2020-04-19T20:06:49Z
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@ericbuijs @Gina @randynose that's very insightful!
(DIR) Post #9uDHpWuwpznDQJNNi4 by FreePietje@x0f.org
2020-04-19T21:01:08Z
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@Gina I thought the various things you shared here, had some underlying cause.When you went back to work after your vacation, I figured I was wrong (and was happy about that).Now I'm putting it back on the table. I don't know what the underlying cause is, but I expect it to be wider then work.Given the waiting list for psychological support is long, I'd suggest to get the process started asap.You seem to be physically active; keep doing that
(DIR) Post #9uDKJK8n6bOcOQBZZo by abbe@bookwor.ms
2020-04-19T21:28:40Z
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@Gina https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7857933243B7D31B and https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feeling_Good:_The_New_Mood_Therapy rescued me. I hope they are of some help to you too. がんばって ね!
(DIR) Post #9uDSdsw4FS6LjRY8hs by FreePietje@x0f.org
2020-04-19T23:02:18Z
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@Gina Re 3) I still think that talking to a psychologist is a good idea. Given the waiting list, better not to wait to long before starting the process.Switching to a new job now/asap sounds like fighting symptoms, instead of finding the cause(s) and addressing that. Which may (also) result in finding a new job/line of work/changes to your current work environment.AFAIK, you're still physical active; keep doing that.