Post 3074385 by brushy@snouts.online
(DIR) More posts by brushy@snouts.online
(DIR) Post #3073263 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T14:20:34Z
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trans squad and pals i need a mood booster im challenging myself to go into spaces gendered for women as someone who codes as masc and assert that i'm there because i'm looking to change my appearance top to bottom, but don't know where to start and could use pointers on [x]today's challenge: ulta beauty. i want to get some better gender joy tools beyond my self-checkout target flights of fancy's ability to reckonthis is gonna be tough!
(DIR) Post #3073267 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T14:22:37Z
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i'm specifically doing this as desensitization therapy. if it's so scary for me to even show interest in fem coded things that i can't do it in public on my own, i don't feel exactly like i've Made It yet. i need to feel out the shape of the performative gender closet i had been stuck in to figure out where i want to go from there!but it's an uphill climb. i'm not picking small shops that are lgbt friendly first. i'm going right to the Bigs
(DIR) Post #3073270 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T17:45:43Z
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oh my god thank you everyone who responded itt. you gave me the inspiration to goi actually had a different experience than i thought i would! i talked with so many new people, and learned a lot about both myself and this new space - it was like a field trip, which is why i titled this postin speaking with their head aesthetician (yall called it - they brought their big guns out just for me, all staff rocktalking together)
(DIR) Post #3074384 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T17:48:28Z
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after speaking to the head aesthetician about where i see myself going in the short, medium, and long term, i was able to chart a path forward through the hair and skin parts of my gender journey. it was practically like having a gender therapist in the room with me as i talked about what i wanted. i teared up a few times. so did she a bit. blessed.i determined that i wanted to do something more mindful with my hair. pics incoming!
(DIR) Post #3074385 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T17:51:26Z
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hair is so hard for me yall because as a beautiful mixed race latinx i get lots of looks for it. it's got a sort of jfk wave to it and a lighter color than most people who code as latinx, but i've literally had people wanna touch it. along with that, i have some pretty naturally lush eyelashes - to the point my mom used to tell me "i only wish my eyes could be as pretty as yours" and whoa that's a deep good memory that i just now remembered
(DIR) Post #3074386 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T18:00:19Z
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i felt pretty as a lil kid, once upon a time. i felt pretty more than i felt handsome. handsome was always such a top down, guess what, time to be a man word to mepretty? i loved pretty. not necessarily in the princess sense - i think it might be a heritage thing that for me the ricosuave latinx androgyne rakish lover was how i really wanted to beit's not handsome. it's gorgeous. it's beautiful. it's explosive, really - dangerous!
(DIR) Post #3074388 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T18:06:23Z
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i wanted to be the antonio banderas or the gorgeous men on my abuelitas telenovelasi watched with her and i think she got that i wasn't like the other boys. she treated me bad for it, i think - like she didn't know what to do with me - but i think she knew. one of the last things she gave me before she passed was a set of ribbons - including one with a six color rainbow. maybe there was more under the surface than i ever got to explore.
(DIR) Post #3074389 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T18:09:41Z
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at any rate, i got my hair highlighted - i told her that since i wanted to grow my hair out (but right now it looks kinda bowl cut length), instead of just treating it like a regular boycut deal i wanted to consult like "what will make this look intentional and not like mom did it with the fiskers"she suggested babylights, which highlight the tops of the hair but dont go all down the lengths - she said it would create a sense of coherence
(DIR) Post #3074390 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T18:12:30Z
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i wasn't sure what to expect, and i felt a little resistance, but i identified it this time as the cop in my head and chose instead to assent - "i trust your judgment on this!" i kept saying. she prob thought i was just wild lol, i felt itand she was Dead On. the look went from "damn kid you been under a rock for four months" to "oh my god enby superstar" in just one session. what an ultra Ulta goddess, weaving those hair magicks i need
(DIR) Post #3074392 by brushy@snouts.online
2019-01-17T18:20:46Z
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the proof, at long last. today i took the most scripted selfie - its proof of a thing, rather than “fuckin round with my filters lol,,,,” and so its scarier to own, so,Hi! My name is Robin! I’m a latinx transfem agender enby in love with my enby husband and more simply ID as queer. on HRT (2 months)! Nice to meet you for real this time! Glad to show you a truer self.
(DIR) Post #3074393 by baronnarcveldt@knzk.me
2019-01-17T18:27:56Z
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@brushy this journey is amazing and inspiring :) it's so good to know that there are femme spaces that are open to that kind of change