     The  F I D O N E W S      Volume 19, Number 03             21 Jan 2002 
     +--------------------------+-----------------------------------------+
     | |The newsletter of the | | Fido, Fidonet and dog-with-diskette are |
     | |  FidoNet community.  | | US Registered Trademarks of Tom Jennings|
     | |                      | |     San Francisco, California, USA      |
     | |          ____________| |                                         |
     | |         /  __          | Crash netmail articles to:              |
     | |        /  /  \         |          Editor @ 2:2/2 (+46-31-944907) |
     | | WOOF! (  /|oo \        | Routed netmail articles to:             |
     |  \_______\(_|  /_)       |          Bjorn Felten @ 2:203/0         |
     |            _ @/_ \    _  | Email attach to:                        |
     |           |     | \   \\ |          bfelten@telia.com              |
     |           | (*) |  \   ))|                                         |
     |           |__U__| /  \// |         Editor: Bjrn Felten            |
     |   ______   _//|| _\   /  |                                         |
     |  / Fido \ (_/(_|(____/   |   Newspapers should have no friends.    |
     | (________)       (jm)    |                    -- JOSEPH PULITZER   |
     +--------------------------+-----------------------------------------+
            Copyright 2002 by Fidonews Editor for Fidonews Globally.


                        Table of Contents
     1. FOOD FOR THOUGHT  .........................................  1
     2. INSIDE  ...................................................  2
        The Fidonews at a Glance  .................................  2
     3. EDITORIAL  ................................................  3
        Don't get keyboard crazy  .................................  3
     4. GENERAL ARTICLES  .........................................  5
        A Future for Fidonet?  ....................................  5
     5. GUEST EDITORIAL  ..........................................  7
        Barking up the (wrong) Tree  ..............................  7
     6. FIDONET SOFTWARE REVIEWS  ................................. 15
        A friendly bombing run  ................................... 15
     7. OL'WDB'S COLUMN - WARREN BONNER  .......................... 18
        Ol'WDB's Column  .......................................... 18
     8. FIDONET'S INTERNATIONAL KITCHEN  .......................... 21
        Japanese Dashi  ........................................... 21
        Russian Borsjtj  .......................................... 21
     9. CLEAN HUMOR & JOKES  ...................................... 23
        BASTARD OPERATOR FROM HELL #1  ............................ 23
        Guidelines for American Tourists  ......................... 25
     10. TODD COCHRANE'S FIDONET SOFTWARE LISTING  ................ 29
        Fidonet Software List  .................................... 29
     11. SPECIAL INTEREST  ........................................ 33
        Nodelist Stats  ........................................... 33
     12. FIDONEWS INFORMATION  .................................... 35
        How to Submit an Article  ................................. 35
        Credits, Legal Infomation, Availability  .................. 36
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 1                   21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                             FOOD FOR THOUGHT
     =================================================================

      "I know not what weapons World War III will be fought with, but
       World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."

                           -- Albert Einstein --

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     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 2                   21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                                  INSIDE
     =================================================================

                            The Fidonews at a Glance

        In the "Editorial" this week, I vent some thoughts about why we so
     easily act like jerks in echo- and netmail.

        The "General Articles" section received only one submission, from
     Michael Grant, giving his pennies worth on the future of FidoNet.

        Frank Vest explains why it's more important to gain more writers to
     FidoNet than to increase the nodelist, in a guest editorial.

        In "Fidonet Software Reviews" I tell you about an old, but rarely
     heard of, program, that I think can make things easier for most of the
     users as well as coordinators and sysops of FidoNet.

        Ol' man Bonner is back again, as hot as ever.

        Our "International Kitchen" section has the first of 15 dainty
     dishes from Japan, thanks to Carol, our correspondent from the Far
     East, plus this editor takes a shot on Russian beet root soup, i.e.
     Borsjtj.

        Yet another one from the archives went into the "Clean Jokes..."
     section, awaiting funnier contributions from the readers. I sincerely
     hope that no French readers will take offence. The edge is pointed at
     the typical US tourist and not at you!

        You'll also find there the first of a planned series from the times
     when sysops were serious men with white coats and computers were
     bigger than closets and needed a small nuclear power plant to operate;
     the classic Bastard Operator From Hell. Just to put things in
     perspective. Don't try this at home kids, he's a pro, he knows what
     he's doing...


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     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 3                   21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                                 EDITORIAL
     =================================================================

                        Don't get keyboard crazy
                           By Bjrn Felten

     When on the streets in a car, you've probably encountered what's often
     referred to as street crazy. This is what people so easily get, when
     something happens. Someone bumps into your car, and suddenly you can
     find yourself in a highly animated discussion with the other driver,
     that often can develop into a nasty situation with violent, and, even,
     in countries where there's a handgun in every glove compartment, fatal
     results.

        How come then, that if you bump into that same person, walking on
     the pavement (that's sidewalk to some of you), there almost never
     develops a case of pavement craziness? In just a split second both
     parties resolve the potential conflict, and all is well.

        The simple explanation is body language. When you accidentally bump
     into someone, you know exactly what to do with your face, shoulders,
     arms and the rest of the body, to immediately apologize. And the
     amazing thing is, that this language seems to be highly universal. It
     works in London, Paris and Berlin as well as in Tokyo, New York and
     Rio de Janeiro.

        But when you sit tucked away in a car, with only your face showing,
     and sometimes not even that, behind shining or even dark windscreens,
     you don't have access to this powerful language. At best, all you have
     is the finger, and that's not the best way to start a discussion...

        Now take our means of communication, here in Fidonet, the written
     word. Ask any good actor to read a couple of lines, taken out of a
     greater context, and he'll tell you it's impossible to know how to
     read them. They can be read in a thousand different ways, giving them
     a thousand different meanings.

        This is what we're up against, when we read mail, echo- as well as
     netmail. We see the written words, but without the proper body
     language to go with those words, and without being able to hear the
     writer saying them in the way they were intended (high, low, funny,
     serious, fast, slow etc.) we lack probably 90% of the information
     needed to fully understand the message.

        So why are we then so fast to reply to those words, in the way many
     does: with invectives, insults and other bashings? Well, to the best
     of my experience, it's often persons with the greatest experience of
     participating in mostly sysop echoes (I think those echoes are the
     worst ones in this respect) that are the worst offenders. Maybe they
     are so used to almost every message being an attack on them
     personally, they automatically jump to the worst conclusion?

        The remedy is of course, to try to have sysops meeting in person,
     where they can make full use of their body language and voices. After
     such a SupCon or whatever, things have always cooled down considerably
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 4                   21 Jan 2002


     among the participants. That's a proven fact. So let's all join in on
     a wish for more SupCon's to the people!


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     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 5                   21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                             GENERAL ARTICLES
     =================================================================


                      A Future for Fidonet?

                   By Michael Grant (1:134/11)


     I note that those with a one sided view on Fidonet are still taking
     delight in using the Fidonews as a political platform to further their
     views and attempt to discredit those with ideas other than their
     preferred point of view. It's interesting to note that Luke Kolin has
     nothing constructive to say; his article is full of negativity and
     dire prognostications for the future of Fidonet.

     Not all of us are so pessimistic, however. There are many bright
     people with lots of good ideas to improve this network, and those
     ideas don't have to be politically motivated or follow an agenda.

     I was sitting at this computer about a week or two ago, enjoying a
     game of Dune (I'd just purchased the CD), when a BBS user paged me for
     a chat. It turns out he was a young programmer with some new ideas on
     messaging and Fidonet-style networks. We had a long chat, and it was
     mainly to do with how FTN's (Fidonet Technology Networks) can improve
     their visibility and participation of users from the Internet.

     Basically, his ideas boiled down to using a new format to access
     message areas from a website. He also wants to create a method for
     exchanging these messages amongst many systems, similar to the way
     that FTN's use mailers to "echo" their messages. As the ZC of an
     "othernet" called WorldNet (Zone 13), that mainly gates Internet
     Newsgroups to an FTN format, I agreed with him when he mentioned that
     the NNTP servers used by those Newsgroups are far too restrictive and
     inflexible, and the big Usenet servers generally do not listen to the
     concerns of their users. The FTN way of doing things, using amateur
     volunteer sysops, is far more responsive and responsible to their
     users.

     The format he has in mind to use is XML. "XML" stands for "Extensible
     Markup Language". It was designed to improve the functionality of web
     design by providing more flexibility and adaptability in the message
     identification code than HTML does. Unlike HTML, it is not a fixed
     format; it is not a single pre-defined markup language, but instead is
     actually a metalanguage, which is a language used for defining other
     languages. Thus it is pretty much unlimited in possibilities, because
     a programmer could use XML to design their own customized markup
     language for limitless different types of documents. (For more
     information on the XML format, please see the bottom of the article)

     This programmer told me he has talked with the developers of
     Synchronet BBS, and I gave him information on how to contact the
     author of Mystic BBS. He wants to make his new format as portable as
     possible, and wants to incorporate seamless conversions from his new
     format to SMB, JAM, and Squish format message bases. I agreed to
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 6                   21 Jan 2002


     alpha-test whatever software he may come up with, and to use WorldNet
     as a testing ground for his ideas.

     I envision the end result of this as in effect creating a multitude of
     web-based BBS's with message forums built-in. A user would log in via
     a CGI-type login, and would have access to a large number of different
     message areas, just as a BBS user would log in and have access to
     Fidonet echoes. Messages would then be echoed between these web-based
     system, and also be converted to the older FTN format to be further
     echoed to systems without web access. Message areas could still be
     effectively moderated, as the sysop of a web-based BBS could cut a
     person's access to his system upon a moderator's request.

     With proper promotion on the web, there is no reason why something
     like this could not prove very popular. Just look at the interest in
     Yahoo groups as an alternative to the standard news servers. Imagine
     by encouraging a multitude of systems offering shared message areas,
     an even higher profile on the web may be attained. Also, imagine that
     a user of these new systems could post a message to the actual person
     they're addressing, instead of being forced to address their message
     to "All". Imagine yet again internet-based message areas that do not
     contain large quantities of spam and pornographic promotions.

     The development of something like this may take quite a while yet, and
     it may take some time to see if it proves popular. I feel however,
     that anyone who has in mind to develop programs of this nature ought
     to be encouraged and assisted in every way possible. Acceptance of new
     ideas like this may be difficult; such changes are often resisted in
     Fidonet, and I cautioned this programmer not to expect immediate
     acceptance from Fidonet, but if it proves popular and easily
     convertible to the older FTN formats, I don't see any reason why
     Fidonet could not take advantage of this new idea to promote itself,
     and indeed such an idea may in fact save the old dog from an untimely
     demise, if we can just teach that old dog some new tricks.

     Here's some links to info on XML:

     The XML FAQ Page: http://www.ucc.ie/xml/

     The XML specifications are documented at:
     http://www.w3.org/TR/REC-xml

     XML is public domain, and is a project of the World Wide Web
     Consortium. Their website is at: http://www.w3.org



     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 7                   21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                              GUEST EDITORIAL
     =================================================================

                          Barking up the (wrong) Tree
                                 By Frank Vest
                                  1:124/6308.1

     Dear Readers:

      Tom Jennings created Fidonet. He designed the Fidonet system around
     the Bulletin Board Systems that were already in existence. You
     remember, those Bulletin Board Systems that were/are run by those
     "cantankerous" Sysops. :-) Tom gave this new thing he created a name.
     He called it Fidonet. Why he choose that name, I don't know. Maybe
     there is a reason. The reason for the name, however, isn't the point
     of this article and I'll "let sleeping dogs lie" on that. :)

      Fidonet... What's in a name? Well, the trademark that Tom registered
     is a drawing of a dog with a diskette in it's mouth. I guess you could
     say that Fidonet is a dog. To be more descriptive, a female dog. I say
     female because she can be a real... well... er.. you know. :-)

      Since Fido is female, I suppose that Sysops could be considered her
     puppies. After all, Fido started out as a couple of dogs barking back
     and forth and grew from there to be thousands of dogs barking back and
     forth. One thing /is/ certain. Dogs bark and puppies learn to bark. Of
     course, puppies have to learn what to bark at. How? Maybe the mother
     teaches them? Maybe other influences are involved? At any rate, these
     puppies grow into dogs and have more puppies and so on. Some die off
     and others leave while new ones join. Each generation learns to bark
     and what to bark at from the previous group of dogs or some other
     influence.

      Many times, dogs bark up trees. They sit, or stand, at the base of
     trees and bark while looking up into the trees. Maybe they see
     something that they want or something is up there that they are trying
     to get down. Maybe there was something there, but it is now gone and
     they just bark because others are barking. Sometimes they bark at each
     other. Maybe they are trying to figure out what they are barking at
     and are asking each other;

     "What the heck is up there?"
     "Nothing."
     "Then why the heck are we all barking up this tree?"
     "I wasn't. You were. I was barking up this other tree that has
     something in it."
     "Oh yeah?? That tree is empty too!"
     "Are you saying that I'm stupid or something?!? I'll show you!!"

     And the fight is on.

     Now when the fight is started, the other dogs stop barking and join in
     the fight. They growl, snap and bite at each other. Each takes it's
     place on the "proper" sides and while the dog fight rages, whatever
     was, or might have been, in the trees goes somewhere else and is lost.
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 8                   21 Jan 2002


      So, what was up in those trees that was once so interesting to us
     dogs? What did we have then that we don't have now? Could it be Nodes?
     Well, yes. We are low on Nodes. Once Fidonet had tens of thousands of
     nodes. I'm not sure that is it... at least not totally. Maybe it's
     technology? Well, we had that then and we have it now. It may not be
     totally up to the current standards, but we use a lot of fairly high
     tech stuff. The old technology has and is still being replaced in
     Fidonet. Sure, we're not the Internet, but we're a hobby, not a
     business. I'm not sure that is it either... at least not totally.

      Again, what was up in those trees?? Could it be "Users"? You remember
     them, don't you? The people that used to call your BBS to talk to
     friends, DL a file or two, play a game, ask a question or just chat.

      Oh... You don't run a BBS? You've never run a BBS? :(

      Then please, read on.

      Fidonet started out as a few friends sharing messages between each
     other. With the advent of echomail, Fidonet grew to tens of thousands
     of Nodes with ten times that many Users and more. Why did Fidonet have
     so many Users? I'd venture that for every Node, there was a minimum of
     ten Users. Why?? Well, those "cantankerous" Sysops ran their Bulletin
     Boards for their own reasons. Mostly for, and to attract, the Users.
     Without the Users, why run a BBS? Sysops barked up the trees to get
     the Users to come down and play.

      Dogs like to play. :)

      Now, you might believe that the Internet took all the BBS Users. Did
     it really??  Maybe the Sysops in Fidonet let them leave. When the
     Internet started coming into the computer scene, it started barking up
     trees to attract Users and it worked. Users started leaving Fidonet to
     become a part of this new Internet dog. Some BBSs left because of the
     Internet and probably because they saw their Users leaving. Why run a
     BBS if the Users are leaving and new Users are not coming in?

      So, why did the Users leave and why didn't/don't they come back? Why
     didn't they use both the Internet and Fidonet?  I'll give one theory
     that I have.

      Until the Internet really started becoming popular, Fidonet was "the
     only show in town". As such, there was really little need for Sysops
     or BBSs to "attract" Users. People were getting new computers. Users
     were telling friends about this "Fidonet" dog that was so great and
     showing their friends how to use that new computer to connect to this
     dog. Basically, The Dog barked once and the Users took it from there.
     In time, the dog stopped barking, certain in the belief that the Users
     would "keep the ball rolling".

      As time went on, This Internet "dog" came along. It started barking
     up a few trees and, like Fidonet, the Users took it from there. As
     Users started leaving Fidonet, Nodes started leaving. Now, Fidonet BBS
     Sysops didn't worry about this too much at first. It didn't matter if
     a User left your BBS, there were hundreds to replace that one User...
     But now, suddenly, these Users were leaving and no new ones were
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 9                   21 Jan 2002


     coming in to replace them. Of course, this had to be blamed on the
     Internet. There's no way that the Fidonet BBS Sysops could be at
     fault.

     "Hey you! Who are you and why are you barking up our tree?!?"
     "I'm the Internet. "I just wanna bark a few times." "It looks like
     fun!"
     "Ok, It won't matter anyway." Them stupid Users won't come to you
     because we're better!" "Besides, I too lazy to bark anyway."

     <time passes>

     "Hey!!" "Where are my Users?!?"
     "They went to us."
     "Who are you??"
     "We're the Internet!"
     "Why did they go to you???"
     "Because you let them go. You were too lazy and smug to bark for them
     to stay with or come back to you."

     <turns to other Fidonet dogs>

     "Hey guys!" This Internet dog says that we let our Users go!"
     "Did not!"
     "Did to!"
     "It was your fault!"
     "Was not!"
     "Was too!!"
     "So what!?!" "What do we do now?!?"
     "We need to get more Nodes!"
     "Yeah!" "That's it!!" "How???"
     "We do it this way!"
     "No!" "We do that way!!"
     "NO!!" "MY WAY!!"

      And the fights start because of this, or other excuses. Of course,
     all those Fidonet dogs stopped barking up the trees to get the Users
     down to play. In fact, those Fidonet dogs stopped barking at almost
     everything. Instead, those Fidonet dogs fought amongst themselves
     about the loss of Nodes saying; "Who's to blame?" "How do we get new
     Nodes?" "It's your fault!"  and other things, until more Users and
     Nodes left and went to the Internet.

      Now, what about this Internet? How does it keep Users and what does
     it do?

      The Internet and Fidonet aren't that much different in many ways.
     Both started out as individual systems. The Internet was government
     and education systems while Fidonet was single computers ran by
     Sysops. A way to network all these systems together via phone lines
     came along and things took off from there.

      I'm not saying that Fidonet can compete with the Internet. I'm saying
     that Fidonet has stopped trying to attract Users and is, instead,
     fighting amongst themselves while ignoring the real reason for their
     existence. The Internet is always trying to attract new Users.
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 10                  21 Jan 2002


     Tom Jennings said:
     "But FidoNet's most basic element is a bulletin board. What FidoNet
     is, is a set of protocols that lets the bulletin boards communicate.
     FidoNet started as a bunch of bulletin boards, running my Fido
     software. FidoNet was added later, to allow point - to - point email
     between Fido boards."

      Take all the *Cs, Policy, geography and whatever away and "FidoNet's
     most basic element is a bulletin board."

      I'd add that the Bulletin Board's most basic element is the User.

      It's been argued that with Internet connectivity, telnet and other
     technology, Fidonet doesn't need geography and forcing geography is
     costing Fidonet it's Nodes.

      Maybe it really doesn't matter if geography is forced or not. What
     difference does it make if you are forced into a certain Zone, Region
     or Net? Does that affect your communication? Not really. The Internet
     connectivity removes that problem. What does it matter if you are in
     this or that Net or group? The only reason that it matters is for the
     perceived power it might bring or the political motivation.

      At the risk of being rude, You people on all sides of the geography,
     abuse, power, P4 and other arguments need to get a life!! You fight
     and fight while the Users that could make Fidonet something all stay
     in the Internet trees because they can get fights, argument (and spam
     as a bonus) there already. Nothing new or interesting in connecting to
     a dial-up or telnet BBS. We lost those Users to the Internet because
     we didn't move as fast with technology as the Internet. We now have
     some of that technological ability back, yet we sit and fight over
     attracting new Nodes instead of barking up the Internet trees and
     telling the Users that we are here. Many don't even know that we exist
     because they grew up with the Internet.

      I ask you;  Does Fidonet need more Nodes?

      It's argued that Fidonet needs more Nodes to grow. That shouldn't be
     real hard. With the ability to connect world wide, Fidonet could make
     a package that would automatically install at the click of a mouse,
     fetch a nodelist, parse it and determine a Node number based on what
     is not currently in use. It then sends an update to the person that
     handles the Node segment for that Net and a new Node (puppy) is born.

      That same program, if un-installed, could send an update to a program
     that would automatically remove the Node number to allow someone else
     to receive it later. No *Cs involved, No geography. No Zones, Regions
     or Nets to worry about. All automatic and able to add Nodes by the
     dozens. Of course, there would be no Users on these Nodes... Just
     Nodes that can fight amongst themselves until tired and then leave. No
     benefit there. :(

     Maybe what Fidonet /needs/ is more Users for it to grow.

      Bulletin Boards were around /before/ Fidonet. Bulletin Boards were,
     and are, run by "cantankerous" sysops. Fidonet had to, and does, fit
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 11                  21 Jan 2002


     into this BBS thing. So, why did those Sysops run a BBS? Maybe it
     /was/ because that was the requirement then. Maybe it was so that they
     could fight amongst themselves back then.... But, maybe... just maybe
     it was to have and attract Users. To provide a service to Users. To
     enjoy having a BBS with Users. To see the message bases on their
     systems being read and written to by Users.

      Why did those Sysops join Fidonet? Maybe it was to fight over
     geography. Maybe it was to complain about *Cs abusing power. Maybe...
     Just maybe... it was to give a broader message base populated with
     messages for their Users?

      How many Bulletin Boards are in Fidonet today? I don't mean Nodes...
     I mean Bulletin Boards!! You remember those? The systems that are open
     to Users via dial-up, telnet or both? Bulletin Boards that offer
     message areas via Fidonet for Users to read and reply in? We've only
     mentioned them a few places in this editorial. :)

      In years past, the vast majority, maybe up to 99%, of the Nodes in
     Fidonet had a BBS for Users to connect to. How many are there today?
     I'd venture the number to be far less. Most are now just Nodes in a
     "phone book" called the Nodelist. They cry that they have no messages
     in the echos, Fidonet is dying, it's /your/ fault because of P4,
     geographical restrictions, *Cs abusing their power, Sysops abusing *Cs
     and dozens of other excuses.

     And they fight... Why??

      Maybe, in reality, it's because Sysops in Fidonet don't have anything
     better to do but fight. Maybe they have forgotten, or never learned,
     that Fidonet was/is for Bulletin Board Systems to exchange messages
     written by Users. Maybe it's because they see those bad old Internet
     trees that have all the users in them and figure "We can't compete
     with that, let's fight!" Maybe they see the Fidonet trees all but
     empty and say "What's the use, there's nobody there, /and/ it's your
     fault, let's fight!" Maybe it's because they don't have a BBS for
     Users to access and they figure "A BBS isn't needed, we need more
     Nodes and it's /your/ fault that we aren't getting them. Let's fight!"

      Whatever the reason and whatever the justification, there are trees
     full of Internet Users. Why? Maybe it's because the Internet shows
     their Users how to access them. Maybe it's because ISPs aren't just
     Sysops that have a IP address and are trying to get more people to
     become ISPs Maybe it's because they don't sit around blaming other
     ISPs for killing the Internet or not trying to attract more people to
     become ISPs.

     If the Internet operated as Fidonet now seems to, the Internet would
     be dying because they would be so busy fighting and blaming each other
     for not attracting more people to become ISPs that they would forget
     about the Users that make the Internet viable in the first place.
     Fidonet is dying because Nodes, who are the ISPs (FSPs) of Fidonet,
     are too busy fighting and blaming each other for not attracting more
     Nodes instead of doing what they should do.... attract new Users...
     offering those Users "how to" help in connecting to a BBS... and, of
     course, running a BBS for those Users to connect to!!
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 12                  21 Jan 2002


     Ladies and gentlemen, Fidonet is a "Service Provider". It provides
     that service via Bulletin Board Systems and Fidonet Points to the
     Users.  You may say that Fidonet can't be compared to the Internet...
     it's "apples and oranges", but is it really that different??

     A "Dynamic IP address" in Fidonet = <user name> @ <some BBS>
     A "Static IP address" in Fidonet = Zone:Net/Node.Point  <Note the
     Point>

     "Static Address pools" for Fidonet Service Providers are the Point
     addresses. There are 9999 of them for each FSP (Node) in Fidonet. So
     each FSP can have 9999 Users with added "features" somewhat like the
     static IP Users have. Plus, each BBS has an unlimited amount of
     "dynamic" addresses. There's not that much difference.

      People! There are telnet Bulletin Board Systems on the Internet. Many
     are not in Fidonet and they have many Users. There are still some
     dial-up Bulletin Board Systems and they have Users. Why? Could it be
     because they are barking at the Internet trees and getting people to
     come down to play? I think this is one good guess.

      With today's technology, a telnet BBS can reach many people. Even
     dial-up systems can reach many people. Fidonet can send mail for
     little or no cost via the Internet using such things as FTP, BinkP and
     more. We have the technology and we use it. Sadly, we use it too often
     as an excuse to fight amongst ourselves.

      Many people don't want to be "providers". Many want to be Users. They
     don't want the hassle of having to run a computer 24/7, configure
     programs, fix problems and such. They want access! The ISPs offer that
     access! Fidonet offered that access at one time. The Internet started
     much the same as Fidonet. There were computer systems run totally
     independent of each other much like the BBS systems. They had Sysops
     that kept them going just like the BBS. A way was created to allow
     these systems to connect together to exchange files and mail much the
     same as Fidonet. They grew much the same as Fidonet. They keep growing
     because they attract Users!... /NOT/ because they attract providers!
     If you get the Users, that will cause the demand for Providers and
     they will come!

      The Internet saw the trees full of Fidonet Users and started barking
     at them to "Come play with us" and the Users came. More ISPs came into
     being to service this exploding mass of Users. Fidonet saw the Users
     leaving for the Internet trees and, instead of barking at the User to
     come back or moving to attract new Users, looked at each other saying;

     "We need more Nodes."
     "It's /your/ fault that we don't have more Nodes!"
     "The Internet is taking our Users... it's your fault that we don't
     have more Nodes!"
     "I'm not running a BBS anymore because there are no Users... It's your
     fault that we don't have more Nodes!"
     "It doesn't matter that there are no Bulletin Boards in Fidonet for
     Users to call... It's your fault that we don't have more Nodes!"

      This fighting and arguing isn't why Fidonet is dying. This is just an
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 13                  21 Jan 2002


     end result. Maybe of desperation.

      Geography abuse, policy abuse, Sysop and *C abuse and all the other
     reasons given and argued isn't the problem. They are just excuses...
     sometimes used to justify the desperation.

      The real problem is that Fidonet is trying to save itself by adding
     more Nodes to service Users that it doesn't have because there are
     fewer and fewer BBSs to service Users.

      My friends, Fidonet was built to service the BBS. The BBS was built
     to service the Users. If a BBS wasn't built to service the Users, it
     wouldn't allow access by Users. Once upon a time, Fidonet serviced the
     BBS and the BBS serviced the Users. Now, Fidonet services Fidonet and
     fights constantly because there are fewer and fewer Nodes in it. Once
     upon a time, Fidonet Sysops competed over who had, or could have, the
     most Users on their BBS. They competed /for/ the Users.

     Where did those Sysops go?

      Many went to the Internet. Some still run a BBS on the Internet. Some
     still run dial-up. They still have Users as well. Why? Because they
     attract them. They don't sit around complaining because they were
     assigned IP address 192.168.0.10 when what they really wanted was
     192.168.0.1. They see the Internet trees full of Users and bark at
     those Users to "Come and play with us". The say "Here I am, I'll show
     you how to play and what I like to play. You show me how and what you
     like to play. Let's play. :)"

      Do we really need more Nodes in Fidonet??? Maybe what we really need
     are more Bulletin Boards in Fidonet. Instead of barking and snapping
     at each other because Fidonet is shrinking in Nodes, we should be
     running a BBS and trying to attract enough Users to our BBS, and
     Fidonet, to justify its existence.

      Maybe instead of barking at each other about the empty trees, we
     should be barking at the Internet trees that are full of Users that
     just might like to "come and play" on a BBS with us if shown how.

      My fellow Sysops.  I think Fidonet is "barking up the wrong tree". We
     are trying to attract more Nodes to Fidonet to make it grow. What we
     really need to do is attract more Users to Fidonet. To do this, we
     need Bulletin Board Systems that try to attract Users. This would give
     a reason for existence and, when the Nodes that run Bulletin Boards
     have more than they can handle, others would start Bulletin Boards to
     take the load. Then we can attract more Nodes. Nodes that want to run
     a BBS to attract more Users that attract more Nodes that..... Well,
     it's supply and demand and a darn good upward movement. :-)

      My friends, we don't have the demand for the Fidonet we have now. The
     Users that could cause the demand for Bulletin Boards that would then
     attract more Nodes isn't there. We need to work on that first. Then
     get more Nodes and THEN start to grow again.

      We are, in many ways, "barking up the wrong trees". We need to run
     Bulletin Boards. We need to show people how to access Bulletin Boards,
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 14                  21 Jan 2002


     both dial-up and telnet. We need to write programs that make it easy
     for a User to access a BBS. We need to do this and... We need to bark
     up those Internet trees and show the Users that we are there, how to
     play with us and ask them to "Come and play".

      Instead, Fidonet tells people on the Internet "Come join us. Install
     this program, configure that program, learn batch file language, get
     this device, that utility, and when you've finished learning all this
     technical stuff, you can become a Node in Fidonet.. We don't want you
     as a User. We only want you as a Node!

      The people are say "Good grief! You want me to do all that just to
     come play with you in Fidonet?!? You /are/ insane!! I can get access
     to my ISP in minutes and not have to learn hardly anything!! GO AWAY!"

      My God people! What the heck /are/ we doing to Fidonet?!?!?

      We need to provide the access to Fidonet that the people want first.
     Get the Users to the BBS. Provide the BBS for the Users to get to and
     show them how to get there. Then worry about attracting Nodes. We just
     might find that we don't have to do much attracting of Nodes at all.
     If you build it, they will come. :-)

      When or if Fidonet dies, there will still be Bulletin Boards out
     there. They will still have "cantankerous" Sysops that run them for
     their own reasons. They will still have Users that access them because
     they had been asked, shown how, tried it and liked it... and Fidonet
     will be a memory. :'((  We need those Bulletin Boards and those Users
     far more than they need us or we need more Nodes.

      The Fidonet trees were once full of Users while the Internet trees
     were almost bare. Now the opposite is true... and yet, on the rare
     occasions when we bark up a tree, it's still that old, almost empty,
     Fidonet tree. Then we turn to each other and fight because there are
     fewer Nodes in Fidonet. :(

      At one time, Sysops in Fidonet competed for the Users that were
     available. Now, Fidonet Sysops blame and fight each other over why the
     Nodelist is shrinking while not caring that there are fewer Bulletin
     Boards and fewer Users for the Bulletin Boards that do exist. Not
     knowing or caring that Fidonet was, or is supposed to be, made up of
     Bulletin Boards and that Bulletin Boards are made up of Users.

     We need to get back to what's really needed in Fidonet.

     My Friends. What trees are you barking up?

     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 15                  21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                         FIDONET SOFTWARE REVIEWS
     =================================================================

                           A friendly bombing run
                           Bjrn Felten, 2:203/208


        This really isn't a review but an unabashed plugging for a piece
     of software of mine. :)

        It's almost ten years old now, but I still don't see nets, regions
     or zones making use of it. I've informed every *C I can think of
     about it's existence, to no avail. Maybe I'll be more lucky if I make
     it to the FidoNews.

        In Sweden we've been using it to inform about elections, meetings,
     changes in echomail distribution and other, similar stuff for a
     decade, and it's been working like a charm. Maybe some more parts of
     the FidoNet community would like to take advantage of this concept.

        Using CC as a magic freq name from 2:203/0 will get you the DOS
     version of the program. CC2 will get you the OS/2 version. If someone
     will provide me with an URL to upload it to, I'll be happy to do so.

        The concept is so easy, it's a piece of cake to write even a small
     script to make it work. I've had an Amiga hub in my net that wrote a
     small ARexx script to make it happen.

        The easiest way to present the concept, I guess, is to just copy
     the DOC-file. So here goes (remember it's from the early 1990's)...


     THE IDEA:
     ========

        CC is a totally new concept, built on an idea originally brought
     forward by my present (March -92) NEC, Dick Augustsson, in an article
     in FidoNews.

        The idea was that it's kinda stupid to send a bunch of identical
     netmail, when one wants to reach every sysop in a net, region or may-
     be even zone. It would be better if the actual copying took place as
     close to the recipients as possible. Dicks original idea suggested a
     new kludge to mark the netmail, but that's not really necessary. All
     it takes is the word "All" in the "To:"-field and then the admin.
     nodenumber of the *C where the distribution shall start.

        E.g. a netmail to all sysops in a net is addressed to

        "All, z:nnn/0".

        This single netmail can be routed the normal way, and will, hope-
     fully, eventually reach the host for the net nnn in zone z, where the
     following will happen (if he runs a copy of CC or a clone of it):

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 16                  21 Jan 2002


        To all nodes (if any) between the host and the next *C in the
     nodelist, a copy of the netmail will be created.

        To all hubs (if any) between the host and the next host in the
     nodelist, a copy of the netmail, but addressed to "All", will be
     created for further processing at that site.

        All this applies to any level of the FidoNet organization. If the
     netmail is sent to All at the RC level, than the whole region will
     get the netmail.

        And, of course, you can send a netmail to an entire zone, just by
     addressing it to "All, z:z/0".


     USAGE:
     =====

     Setting up.
     ----------

        Using CC.EXE is very simple if you're running a FrontDoor system,
     since the program uses SETUP.FD to find out what it needs to know.
     Just put the program in your FD system directory. You can delete the
     file CCSETUP.EXE, since it will be of no use to you. Do NOT attempt
     to run CCSETUP in your FD system directory, since it will destroy
     your SETUP.FD!!!

        If you are not using FrontDoor, you can use CCSETUP.EXE to create
     the file SETUP.FD with the minimal data that the program needs.

        If you have more than one hat (naughty, naughty!) it is important
     that the AKA of the highest level comes first in the AKA list, so
     that the program can solve all your levels in one single pass.


     When to run.
     -----------

        The program can be run at any time. It takes just a few seconds
     to run, so there will be no major degradation of the mail processing
     time.


     Exceptions.
     ----------

        Since it is possible that not every *C below your level can run
     the program, it can be issued with "exceptions" in parameters to it,
     in which case the copies to that area will be created at your system.

        E.g. If you are a host and your hubs 200 and 400 are not taking
     part of this new concept, then you run the program like this:

                   "CC 200 400"

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 17                  21 Jan 2002


     Log file.
     --------

        If you want to keep a record of the CC activity you can simply
     redirect the program's output to a log file like this:

                   "CC >> CC.LOG"


     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 18                  21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                      OL'WDB'S COLUMN - WARREN BONNER
     =================================================================

                               Ol'WDB's Column
                             wdbonner@pacbell.net

     Dear friends, neighbors, and across the ponders, it is with sad regret
     that I found Frank has resigned, but extremely happy that he gave us
     Bjrn Felten as our new editor! Some of the pressure on the editor is
     not tolerable, and not his responsibility.  I am speaking from my own
     experience.

     When one has a good friend in the echoes, and that friend decides to
     write an article... and that article is completely unacceptable, yet
     it has always been the trademark of Fidonews to accept anything that
     runs through the Makenews flawlessly, it should fly...  No!  Not any
     more.

     Not if the game is to do things and say things that are harmful to
     Fidonet itself.  The years of playing together as simple users,
     enjoying each others inputs and happily offering our own are now, the
     last few weeks, in jeopardy.

     The fighting and division of Zone 1 are the cause of our last editor
     to give up.  The selfishness of the ones in Z1R12 is the cause of the
     differences that divide us.  They do not believe that P4.07 will ever
     be changed to suit them, thus they want to throw it away, completely
     discord it.

     They also want to defy the elected Z1C because she will not accept the
     person they elected as R12C. They did not ask that person if she would
     perform the job as prescribed by P4.07 and when she did not, and was
     replaced by somebody who would, they were frantic.

     They even started their own "Other-list" to negate the chosen (runner
     up) assigned RC.  The amount of damage they have done to Fidonet in
     Zone One is unthinkable. All because they don't like P4.07 and don't
     want to await the changes that are being worked on to become part of
     the amended policy.

     The IC, Ward Dossche, should take a few moments to back up his ZCC
     with instructions to immediately take precautions that only
     instruments from the ZC's will be in the weekly nodelist.  That will
     stop the folks who are making other lists and merging them with ours.

     If those folks in Z1R12 are allowed to continue their adding new
     members, and telling them that they are now Fidonet nodes, and if they
     are not stopped from taking our Zone one node list and making it their
     own, It may be a very long time before Fidonet gets well and healthy
     again.

     Concerned about this I took the liberty and contacted the Z1C Janis
     Kracht, as she is the one who has held Zone reins for the past two
     years and knows the scam better than I do.  I got this reply back.

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 19                  21 Jan 2002


                  - - - - - - - - - - - -

        My good friend Warren expresses his opinions on the current issues
        above, but first off, I have to tell you that I am  not so
        concerned about this nodelist that these people are passing around
        amongst them selves.

        It won't be the first time that an alternate nodelist has been
        passed around, and I doubt it will be the last.  I expect it will
        be used to convince new nodes in Net 1:229 that they are members of
        our network.. This will work I suppose, until, like Frank Linhares
        found out in the Z1C echo this week, that they are not members of
        our network at all until they are listed in the nodelist that is
        compiled and distributed by the Z1C.  Regarding the R12C:  I won't
        make any excuses for my decision to replace Lesley-Dee Dylan as
        R12C, and I won't make any excuses about the fact I agreed with
        Tony Summerfelt that he should continue as R12C until his term is
        up next year.

        I don't have to and NOT because I am Z1C, but because it is quite
        clear to me that when the RCs of Zone 1 took a survey of the
        sentiments in Zone 1,  I found that most people agree with these
        actions. This says to me that perhaps in elections at this time for
        RC, the outgoing RC or bean-counter will canvass those who would
        run, and ask them the simple question:  Have you read and agreed to
        Policy 4?

        Lesley-Dee Dylan loves to post that she was only doing the "bidding
        of her constituency" in her actions during the week that she was
        R12C.  I say, fine - if what your region is asking you to do is
        within the bounds of policy 4.  She states blatantly that she
        disbelieves in P4.

        It seems to me though, what she was really saying is that she was
        either unwilling or unable to take responsibility for the job.  We
        all know Policy 4 needs updating.  As you read this issue of
        Fidonews, Dale Shipp, a resident of Region 13, has presented to
        Ward Dossche the beginnings of this process... and this is exactly
        how it should be done..

        If you have a problem with something, you must work to change it.
        You cannot simply ignore the problem because, in this instance,
        there are a great number of SysOps in FidoNet who _do_follow policy
        4 and expect the same of others in the network.

        Best of luck to our IC, Ward Dossche and the RCs of Fidonet as they
        embark upon this task.

        Janis Kracht

                  - - - - - - - - - - - -

     With that my good friends, I leave you this thought:  Today is the
     very first day you may really be aware of the Fidonet problems, so
     think it out well before you draw your conclusions, do right for all
     and you will be happy with all.
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 20                  21 Jan 2002


     Warmest Regards, Ol'wdb

     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 21                  21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                      FIDONET'S INTERNATIONAL KITCHEN
     =================================================================

                       Japanese Dashi


     MMMMM----- Recipe via Meal-Master (tm) v8.05

           Title: Dashi
      Categories: Xxcarol, Soups
           Yield: 4 Servings

           1 sm Kombu piece (seaweed/kelp)
           2 c  Water
           1 c  Katsuo bushi (dried bonito)

       The kombu piece will be about 4-5 inches square.

       Place on heat, remove kombu when it comes to a boil and add Katsuo
     Bushi. Once flakes sink, pour through strainer and discard flakes (or
     save for second soup use!).  Can be made without Katsuo Bushi, with
     Shiitake mushrooms in it's place for a less salty and vegetarian type
     but it needs a good 2 hours gentle boil to taste right.

       Optional additions galore!  Top picks are little chunks of Tofu,
     green onions, mushroom bits, shrimp, and shredded cabbage.

       From the kitchen of:  xxcarol

     MMMMM


     -----------------------------------------------------------------

                         Russian Borsjtj
                         By Bjrn Felten

     There's probably as many recipes on this classic Russian dish as there
     are grandmothers in Russia. If any of the Russian readers has a better
     variant, please send it in!

           6     common beet roots
           1     carrot
           1     clove of white cabbage
           2     onions
          30 g   butter (two table spoons)
           1 l   meat stock  (1/4 gallon)
           1     bay leaf
          15 ml  vinegar (one table spoon)
                 salt & pepper to your liking

     1.  Peel beet roots, carrot and onions and chop all vegetables, except
         one beet root, finely.

     2.  Fry the chopped vegetables in the butter in a big pot for a couple
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 22                  21 Jan 2002


         of minutes. Add the stock, bay leaf, salt and pepper.

     3.  Let simmer for 30 minutes.

     4.  With 5 minutes left, shred the remaining beet root into the soup
         to give it a nice, red colour.

     5.  Finally add the vinegar.

         Serve with a big spoonful of crme fraiche or sour creme.



     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 23                  21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                            CLEAN HUMOR & JOKES
     =================================================================

                       BASTARD OPERATOR FROM HELL #1

      It's backup day today so I'm pissed off. Being the BOFH, however,
     does have it's advantages. I assign the tape device to null - it's so
     much more economical on my time as I don't have to keep getting up to
     change tapes every 5 minutes. And it speeds up backups too, so it
     can't be all bad.

      A user rings

      "Do you know why the system is slow?" they ask

      "It's probably something to do with..." I look up today's excuse "..
     clock speed"

      "Oh" (Not knowing what I'm talking about, they're satisfied) "Do you
     know when it will be fixed?"

      "Fixed? There's 275 users on your machine, and one of them is you.
     Don't be so selfish - logout now and give someone else a chance!"

      "But my research results are due in tommorrow and all I need is one
     page of Laser Print.."

      "SURE YOU DO. Well; You just keep telling yourself that buddy!" I
     hang up.

      Sheesh, you'd really think people would learn not to call!

      The phone rings. It'll be him again, I know. That annoys me. I put on
     a gruff voice

      "HELLO, SALARIES!"

      "Oh, I'm sorry, I've got the wrong number"

      "YEAH? Well what's your name buddy? Do you know WASTED phone calls
     cost money? DO YOU? I've got a good mind to subtract your wasted time,
     my wasted time, and the cost of this call from your weekly wages! IN
     FACT I WILL!  By the time I've finished with you, YOU'LL OWE US money!
     WHAT'S YOUR NAME - AND DON'T LIE, WE'VE GOT CALLER ID!"

      I hear the phone drop and the sound of running feet - he's obviously
     going to try and get an alibi by being at the Dean's office. I look up
     his username and find his department. I ring the Dean's secretary.

      "Hello?" she answers

      "Hi, SIMON, B.O.F.H HERE, LISTEN, WHEN THAT GUY COMES RUNNING INTO
     YOUR OFFICE IN ABOUT 10 SECONDS, CAN YOU GIVE HIM A MESSAGE?"

      "I think so..." she says
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 24                  21 Jan 2002


      "TELL HIM `HE CAN RUN, BUT HE CAN'T HIDE'"

      "Um. Ok"

      "AND DON'T FORGET NOW, I WOULDN'T WANT TO HAVE TO TELL ANYONE ABOUT
     THAT FILE IN YOUR ACCOUNT WITH YOUR ANSWERS TO THE PURITY TEST IN
     IT..."

      I hear her scrabbling at the terminal...

      "DON'T BOTHER - I HAVE A COPY. BE A GOOD GIRL AND PASS THE MESSAGE
     ON"

      She sobs her assent and I hang up. And the worst thing is, I was just
     guessing about the purity test thing.  I grab a quick copy anyway, it
     might make for some good late-night reading.

      Meantime backups have finished in record time, 2.03 seconds. Modern
     technology is wonderful, isn't it?

      Another user rings.

      "I need more space" he says

      "Well, why don't you move to Texas?" I ask

      "No, on my account, stupid."

      Stupid?!?.... Uh-Oh..

      "I'm terribly sorry" I say, in a polite manner equal to that of Jimmy
     Stewart in a Family Matinee "I didn't quite catch that. What was it
     that you said?"

      I smell the fear coming down the line at me, but it's too late, he's
     a goner and he knows it.

      "Um, I said what I wanted was more space on my account, *please*"

      "Sure, hang on"

      I hear him gasp his relief even though he covered the mouthpeice.

      "There, you've got plenty of space now"

      "How much have I got"

      Now this REALLY *PISSES* *ME* *OFF*! Not only do they want me to give
     them extra disk, they want to check it, to correct me if I don't give
     them enough. They should be happy with what I give them *and that's
     it*!!!

      Back into Jimmy Stewart mode.

      "Well, let's see, you have 4 Meg available"

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 25                  21 Jan 2002


      "Wow! Eight Meg in total, thanks!" he says pleased with his
     bargaining power

      "No" I interrupt, savouring this like a fine red, at room temperature
     "4 Meg in total..."

      "Huh?... I'd used 4 Meg already, How could I have 4 Meg Available?"

      I say nothing. It'll come to him.

      "aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagggggghhhhhH!"

      I kill me; I really do!


     -----------------------------------------------------------------

                    Guidelines for American Tourists

     The following advisory for American travelers heading for France was
     compiled from information provided by the US State Department, the
     Central Intelligence Agency, the US Chamber of Commerce, the Food and
     Drug Administration, the Centre for Disease Control, and some very
     expensive spy satellites that the French don't know about. It is
     intended as a guide for American travelers only.
     _____________________________________________________

      General Overview

     France is a medium-sized foreign country situated in the continent of
     Europe. It is an important member of the world community, though not
     nearly as important as it thinks. It is bounded by Germany, Spain,
     Switzerland and some smaller nations of no particular consequence and
     with not very good shopping.

     France is a very old country with many treasures, such as the Louvre
     and EuroDisney. Among its contributions to western civilization are
     champagne, Camembert cheese and the guillotine. Although France likes
     to think of itself as a modern nation, air conditioning is little used
     and it is next to impossible to get decent Mexican food. One
     continuing exasperation for American visitors is that the people
     willfully persist in speaking French, (it's like those French have a
     different word for everything!) though many will speak English if
     shouted at. As in any foreign country, watch your change at all times.
     ______________________________________________________

      The People

     France has a population of 54 million people, most of whom drink and
     smoke a great deal, drive like lunatics, are dangerously oversexed,
     and have no concept of standing patiently in line. The French people
     are (in general) gloomy, temperamental, arrogant, aloof and
     undisciplined; and those are their good points.

     Most French citizens are Roman Catholic, though you would hardly guess
     it from their behavior. Many people are communists, and topless
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 26                  21 Jan 2002


     sunbathing is common. Men sometimes have girls' names like Marie or
     Michel, and they kiss each other when they hand out medals.

     American travelers are advised to travel in groups and to wear
     baseball caps and colorful trousers for easier mutual recognition.
     ___________________________________________________

      Safety

     In general, France is a safe destination, though travelers are advised
     that, from time to time, it is invaded by Germany. By tradition, the
     French surrender more or less at once and, apart from a temporary
     shortage of Scotch whisky and increased difficulty in getting baseball
     scores and stock market prices, life for the visitor generally goes on
     much as before. A tunnel connecting France to Britain beneath the
     English Channel has been oened in recent years to make it easier for
     the Government to flee to London.
     _____________________________________________________

      History

     France was discovered by Charlemagne in the Dark Ages. Other important
     historical figures are Louis XIV, the Huguenots, Joan of Arc,  Jacques
     Cousteau and Charles de Gaulle, who was President for many years and
     is now an airport.
     _____________________________________________________

      Government

     The French form of government is democratic but noisy. Elections are
     held more or less continuously, and always result in a run-off. For
     administrative purposes, the country is divided into regions,
     departments, districts, municipalities, cantons, communes, villages,
     cafes, booths, and floor tiles.

     Parliament consists of two chambers, the Upper and the Lower (though
     confusingly, they are both on the ground floor) whose members are
     either Gaullists or communists, neither of whom is to be trusted,
     frankly.

     Parliament's principal preoccupations are setting off atomic bombs in
     the South Pacific, and acting indignant when anyone complains.

     According to the most current State Department intelligence, the
     President now is someone named Jacques. Further information is not
     available at this time.
     _____________________________________________________

      Culture

     The French pride themselves on their culture, though it is not easy to
     see why. All their songs sound the same, and they have hardly ever
     made a movie that you would want to watch for anything but the nude
     scenes. And nothing, of course, is more boring than a French novel.
     _____________________________________________________

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 27                  21 Jan 2002


      Cuisine

     Let's face it, no matter how much garlic you put on it, a snail is
     just a slug with a shell on its back. Croissants, on the other hand,
     are excellent, though it is impossible for most Americans to pronounce
     this word properly.

     In general, travelers are advised to stick to cheeseburgers at leading
     hotels such as Sheraton and Holiday Inn.
     _____________________________________________________

      Economy

     France has a large and diversified economy, second only to Germany's
     in Europe, which is surprising because people hardly work at all. If
     they are not spending four hours dawdling over lunch, they are on
     strike and blocking the roads with their trucks and tractors.

     France's principal exports, in order of importance to the economy,
     are wine, nuclear weapons, perfume, guided missiles, champagne,
     high-caliber weaponry, grenade launchers, land mines, tanks, attack
     aircraft, miscellaneous armaments and cheese.
     ____________________________________________________

      Public Holidays

     France proudly boasts more holidays than any other nation in the
     world. Among its 361 national holidays are 197 saints' days, 37
     National Liberation Days, 16 Declaration of Republic Days, 54 Return
     of Charles de Gaulle in Triumph as if he Won the War Single-Handedly
     Days, 18 Napoleon Sent into Exile Days, 17 Napoleon Called Back from
     Exile Days, and 112 France is Great and the Rest of the World is
     Rubbish Days. Other important holidays are National Nuclear Bomb Day
     (January 12), the Feast of St. Brigitte Bardot Day (March 1), and
     National Guillotine Day (November 12).
     ____________________________________________________

      Conclusion

     France enjoys a rich history, a picturesque and varied landscape, and
     a temperate climate. In short, it would be a very nice country if it
     weren't inhabited by French people.

     The best thing that can be said for it is that it is not Germany.
     ______________________________________________________

      A Word of Warning

     The consular services of the United States government are intended
     solely for the promotion of the interests of American businesses such
     as McDonald's, Pizza Hut and the Coca-Cola Corporation. In the event
     that you are the victim of a crime or serious injury involving at
     least the loss of a limb, report to the American Embassy between the
     hours of 5:15am and 5:20am on any Tuesday or Wednesday, and a consular
     official who is supremely indifferent to your plight will give you a
     list of qualified dentists or something similarly useless.
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 28                  21 Jan 2002


     ___________________________________________________

     Remember, no one ordered you to go abroad. Personally, we always take
     our holidays at Miami Beach, and you are advised to as well.

     Thank you and good luck.



     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 29                  21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                 TODD COCHRANE'S FIDONET SOFTWARE LISTING
     =================================================================


                             Fidonet Software List
                                By Todd Cochrane
     Type:

     B=BBS  D=Door  M=Mailer  T=Tosser   C=Communication (terminal)
     U=Utility  P=Point Software  I=Internet (telnet, BinkP...)

     <+-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+=-=+=-=-+-=-=+=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+>
     (   Software Name     ) |Type| (         Author/Contact              )
     <+-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+=-=|=-=-|-=-=+=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+>
     |BBBS Home Page         |B   | b@bbbs.net                            |
     |                       |    | www.bbbs.net/                         |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |ELEBBS The Elevator    |B   | elebbs@elebbs.com                     |
     |Software Production    |    | www.elebbs.com                        |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Hermes II Project      |B   | info@HermesII.org                     |
     |                       |    | http://www.hermesii.org/              |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Maximus BBS Support    |B   | sales@lainus.com                      |
     |Page (Non Official)    |    | http://www.vector11.com/maximus/      |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |MBSE BBS               |B   | Michiel Broek                         |
     |                       |    | mbroek@users.sourceforge.net          |
     |                       |    | http://mbse.sourceforge.net           |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Mystic BBS             |B   | http://www.mysticbbs.com/mystic/      |
     |                       |    |                                       |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Nexus Bulletin         |B   | groberts@nexusbbs.net                 |
     |Board System           |    | http://www.nexusbbs.net/              |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Proboard, Searchlight, |BC  | info@telegrafix.com                   |
     |Telegrafix             |    | http://www.telegrafix.com             |
     |Communications         |    | 540-678-4050                          |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |RemoteAccess           |B   | Bruce Morse                           |
     |Central                |    | bfmorse@rapro.com                     |
     |                       |    | http://www.rapro.com/                 |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Spitfire BBS           |B   | MDWoltz@AOL.COM                       |
     |Buffalo Creek Software |    |http://www.angelfire.com/ia/buffalo/   |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Synchronet BBS         |BT  | sysop@vert.synchro.net                |
     |                       |    | http://www.synchro.net                |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Telegard BBS           |B   | support@telegard.net                  |
     |                       |    | http://www.telegard.net/              |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Wildcat Interactive    |BTMI| sales@santronics.com                  |
     |Net Server             |    | http://www.santronics.com             |
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 30                  21 Jan 2002


     |Plantinum Express      |    |(305)248-3204                          |
     |                       |    | Santronics Inc.                       |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Bentstone Capabilities |D   | info@stonebenders.com                 |
     |Group                  |    | http://www.srupc.com/mall             |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Jibben Software        |D   | scott@jibben.com                      |
     |                       |    | http://www.jibbensoftware.com/        |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |JNS Software Door Games|D   | Rusty Johnson                         |
     |                       |    | rustyjohnson57@hotmail.com            |
     |                       |    | 304-733-0113                          |
     |                       |    | http://www.geocities.com/jnssoftware/ |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Legend Of The Red      |D   |                                       |
     |Dragon Reborn          |    |                                       |
     |(L.O.R.D.)             |    | http://www.lordlegacy.org/            |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |PC Pursuits            |D   |brucep@pop.kis.net                     |
     |                       |    |(301)240-6653                          |
     |                       |    |http://www.pcpursuits.com/products.htm |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |S and T Software       |D   |Mark Bappe                             |
     |                       |    |mark.bappe@bozax.iainc.net             |
     |                       |    |(770)788-6843                          |
     |                       |    |http://bozax.iainc.net/public/         |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Shinning Star BBS Doors|D   |nannette@shiningstar.net               |
     |                       |    |http://www.shiningstar.net/bbsdoors/   |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Sunrise Door Software  |D   |Al Lawerence                           |
     |                       |    |al@sunrisedoors.com                    |
     |                       |    |(404)256-9518                          |
     |                       |    |http://www.sunrisedoors.com/           |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |The Brainex System     |D   |info@brainex.com                       |
     |                       |    |http://www.brainex.com/brainex_system/ |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Trade Wars Door Game   |D   |jpritch@eisonline.com                  |
     |                       |    |http://www.eisonline.com/tradewars/    |
     |                       |    |1:299/110                              |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Vagabond Software      |D   |Bryan Turner                           |
     |                       |    |vagabond@darktech.org                  |
     |                       |    |http://vagabond.virtualave.net/        |
     |                       |    |1:124/7013                             |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |FMail Support          |T   |wijnstra@fmail.nl.eu.org               |
     |                       |    |http://fmail.nl.eu.org/                |
     |                       |    |2:280/1076                             |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Squish Tosser          |T   |http://www.lanius.com/squish.htm       |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Argus RITLABS          |M   |argus@ritlabs.com                      |
     |                       |    |373-2-246889                           |
     |                       |    |http://www.ritlabs.com/argus/          |
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 31                  21 Jan 2002


     |                       |    |2:469/84                               |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |FrontDoor              |MTPC|Definite Solutions                     |
     |FrontDoor APX          |    |sales@defsol.se                        |
     |Mailer/Point Software  |    |http://www.defsol.se/                  |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |BeeMail Home Page      |M   |http://beemail.gexonline.net           |
     |                       |    |Stephen Proffit                        |
     |                       |    |1:211/405                              |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |BinkleyTerm XE         |M   |http://btxe.sourceforge.net/           |
     |Frontend Mailer        |    |                                       |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |BinkD                  |MI  |maloff@corbina.net                     |
     |                       |    |http://2f.ru/binkd/                    |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Fidogate               |UIT |Martin_Junius@m-j-s.net                |
     |                       |    |http://www.fidogate.org/               |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Fidonet to Internet    |IM  |Bo Bendtsen                            |
     |Mailer                 |    |sales@terminate.com                    |
     |                       |    |http://www.terminate.com/fido2int.htm  |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |GiGo Software          |UI  |http://www.gigo.com/                   |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Internet Rex           |IM  |cruden@cs.ualberta.ca                  |
     |                       |    |http://plaza.v-wave.com/InternetRex/   |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Tmail                  |IM  |http://www.tmail.spb.ru/index-19.htm   |
     |(Russian /w English DL)|    |                                       |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |TransX Multiboard      |M   |support@multiboard.com                 |
     |Communications Inc.    |    |http://www.multiboard.com/software/    |
     |                       |    |transx.html                            |
     |                       |    |1:2401/305                             |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |TransNet               |I   |transnet@ressl.com.ar                  |
     |                       |    |http://www.ressl.com.ar/transnet/      |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Watergate              |I   |ramon@sbbs.se                          |
     |                       |    |http://www2.sbbs.se/hp/ramon/          |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |JetSys-Home of JetMail |TU  |http://www.jetsys.de/                  |
     |JetStat and other Atari|    |                                       |
     |Fidonet utilities      |    |                                       |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |APoint (Author)        |P   |http://www.apoint.websale.net/index.htm|
     |                       |    |http://www.apoint-mail.de (Co-Autho)   |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |CrossPoint             |P   |("Original" version)                   |
     |                       |    |http://www.crosspoint.de               |
     |                       |    |http://www.apoint-mail.de              |
     |                       |    |(OpenXP Projekt)                       |
     |                       |    |http://www.openxp.com (English)        |
     |                       |    |http://www.openxp.de (German)          |
     |                       |    |CrossPoint (XP2 Team)                  |
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 32                  21 Jan 2002


     |                       |    |http://www.xp2.de                      |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |WinPoint95             |P   |http://www.schenksmir.de/wp/english    |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |The OpenXP CrossPoint  |P   |http://www.happyarts.de/xp             |
     |Projekt                |    |                                       |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |Terminate Terminal     |P   |http://www.terminate.com               |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     |PPoint-FTS compatible  |P   |http://www.alcuf.ca/ppoint.htm         |
     |E-Mail System          |    |                                       |
     |-----------------------|----|---------------------------------------|
     \====================================================================/

     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 33                  21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                             SPECIAL INTEREST
     =================================================================

                         Nodelist Stats

      Input nodelist  nodelist.018
                size  1151.3kb
                date  2002-01-18

      The nodelist has  10416 nodes in it
        and a total of  13375 non-comment entries
             including      6 zones
                           65 regions
                          481 hosts
                          719 hubs
                          908 private nodes
                          377 nodes down
                          403 nodes on hold.

      Admin overhead is  1271 ( 12.20 %)

      Speed summary:

               >9600 =    956 (  9.18 %)
                9600 =   8887 ( 85.32 %)
                              (HST  =  183 or   2.06 %)
                              (CSP  =    1 or   0.01 %)
                              (PEP  =   13 or   0.15 %)
                              (MAX  =    0 or   0.00 %)
                              (HAY  =    2 or   0.02 %)
                              (V32  = 4996 or  56.22 %)
                              (V32B =  568 or   6.39 %)
                              (V42  = 4814 or  54.17 %)
                              (V42B =  608 or   6.84 %)
                2400 =    111 (  1.07 %)
                1200 =      6 (  0.06 %)
                 300 =    456 (  4.38 %)

     ----------------------------------------------------------
      File Req Flag   Applicable software     Number of systems
     ----------------------------------------------------------
      XA              Frontdoor <1.99b             3895
                      Frontdoor  2.02+
                      Dutchie 2.90c
                      Binkleyterm >2.1
                      D'Bridge <1.3
                      TIMS
                      Xenia
     --------------------------------------
      XB              Binkleyterm 2.0                 9
                      Dutchie 2.90b
     --------------------------------------
      XC              Opus 1.1                       11
     --------------------------------------
      XP              Seadog                          7
     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 34                  21 Jan 2002


     --------------------------------------
      XR              Opus 1.03                      72
     --------------------------------------
      XW              Fido >12M                     403
                      Tabby
     --------------------------------------
      XX              D'Bridge 1.30                4536
                      Frontdoor 1.99b
                      Intermail 2.01
                      Tmail
     --------------------------------------
      None            QMM                          1483
     --------------------------------------

      CrashMail capable =   3537 ( 33.96 %)
      MailOnly nodes    =   5547 ( 53.25 %)
      Listed-only nodes =    797 (  7.65 %)
      Other             =    535 (  5.14 %)

      [Report produced by NETSTATS - A PD pgm available from 1:106/100]
      [                                 Revised by B Felten, 2:203/208]

     -----------------------------------------------------------------

     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 35                  21 Jan 2002


     =================================================================
                           FIDONEWS INFORMATION
     =================================================================

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     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 36                  21 Jan 2002


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     -----------------------------------------------------------------

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     + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --  FIDONEWS STAFF - -- -- -- -- -- -- -- +
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     FIDONEWS 19-03               Page 37                  21 Jan 2002


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