Subj : mental health
To   : All
From : mary4
Date : Thu Jun 05 2025 11:05 pm

i should explain stuff
i suffered A LOT in my life. i grew up in a reactionary backwards part of USA called the "deep south" area. i am from Monroe, Louisiana. born in  1991 i suffered alot for being hispanic autistic and ADHD growing up in deep south region in the 1990s with disgusting water mind you xD.
i been depressed since 1995 as long as i can remember because i was traumatized in the 1990s by being an outcast and it really messed me up. i made no friends until 1999.... and later in 2014 that 1st friend blocked me because of my mania... i already got depression and PTSD in 1999 (i can tell i have them now but not back then xD) the more abuse and suffering i whent through the worse it got... until the ptsd got cPTSD because of inperson and online bullying. after 1999 i became a social butterfly. and made many friends. teachers in 2006-2008 where discriminating against me because i was different (again) in 2001-2006 i got into so much trouble for minor things i had to clean cafeteria every day. all this really messed me up then 2009-2010 i was a robot ... i felt not human but i met my old friends from 1999-2001 (good days 1999-2001 & 2009-2010) then autumn 2010... uni..... it was so much stress it broke me and in 2012-2013 i developed MANIA and got hospitalized in 4/9/2013 for a character named mary from the game Ib.... (my user name sake xD) she perfectly reflects who i am as a menhera (mentally ill person) and as me as a person.. she is EXACTLY LIKE ME same everything but appearance.. and in 2009 i realized i am a trans gender woman xD. life got way harder because of dysphoria and discrimination. still in uni i got hospitalized 3 times in 2019 because of complications of abuse bullying outcastings and PSYCHOSIS (2019 i believe i developed schizoaffective disorder) i was bipolar 1 before 2019 and after 2012. Mania ruined my life... and since 2019 i been recovering and such and recently as of now (2024) i been recovering from the high octane stress known as louisiana Tech UNiversity i graduated 2 times 2021 and 2024 it only took 7 and 14 years to get 2 degrees... damn adhd and autism and MENTAL ILLNESSES!!! i am glad to be alive my life is slowly improving as long as my hrt or my existance is not threatend nor my friends... <3

thank you <3

--love mary4 (Victoria Crenshaw)

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