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                                         -6-
       
                      W E S T E R N  U N I O N  T E L E G R A M
       
       TO:  JEHOVAH YAHWEH                   [Illustration:  a man covered with
                                             hair wearing sandals pointing to
       CARE:  CELESTIAL HOTEL (SUITE #666)   two gravestones reading "O Man Of
                                             Faith," with the legend, "Apostle
       PRESIDENTIAL TIER, PARADISE           Zarathud.  A balloon reads, "You're
                                             right, son!...It would be a _waste_
                                             of your kind of talent to go into
       DEAR GOD;                             the security business!"]
       
           THIS IS TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR CURRENT POSITION AS DEITY IS
       
       HEREWITH TERMINATED DUE TO GROSS INCOMPETENCE   STOP   YOUR CHECK
       
       WILL BE MAILED   STOP   PLEASE DO NOT USE ME FOR A REFERENCE
       
           RESPECTFULLY,
       
       MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER/OMNIBENEVOLENT POLYFATHER OF VIRGINITY IN GOLD
       
       POEE HIGH PRIEST