Dilbert - 1995-10-15 - 
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 (IMG) 1995-10-15
       Dogbert sits across from the Boss's desk.  The Boss asks, "Why do you
       want to be our new 'Long Range Planner,' Mister Dogbert?"   Dogbert
       replies, "Because 'long range' is very far away . . ."   Dogbert
       continues, ". . . Therefore it will be impossible to evaluate my
       performance."   Dogbert continues, "If it's not too much to ask, I'd
       like to be on flex-time so you'll never know if I'm supposed to be at
       work."   Dogbert continues, "I'll need an Internet connection at home
       so I can telecommute and not pollute.  Because I give a hoot."  
       Dogbert continues, "Also, I'd like to be in a group with lots of
       losers.  That way I'll get the biggest riase when we're ranked."   The
       Boss says, "You're hired.  All of the other applicants demanded
       relocation expenses and I have no budget for that."   Dogbert stands
       at a desk.  Dilbert asks, "Why do I have to work while you just look
       for poodle graphics on the Internet?"  Dogbert says, "Don't work too
       hard; I'd like a big raise."
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