When you see someone weeping in grief at the departure of his child
or the loss of his property, take care not to be carried away by
the appearance that the externals he is involved in are bad, and be
ready to say immediately, “What weighs down on this man is not what
has happened (since it does not weigh down on someone else), but
his judgment about it.” Do not hesitate, however, to sympathize
with him verbally, and even to moan with him if the occasion
arises; but be careful not to moan inwardly.