There is a great motivational speaker, tony robbins, who says to
   the audience "I have The Secret to getting anything you want in
   life and it comes down to one word. (Dramatic pause while
   audience talks amongst themselves) ASK." You have to ask the
   right question. Ask the right person. Ask at the right
   time/right place. Ask in the right way (tone of voice, body
   language...). And Ask Specifically. I would love to master this
   stuff, but at least I know how I'm supposed to do it. And I
   believe he's 100% right. "