date: Sat Nov 22 08:18:09 PM PST 2025 subj: twins moments of joy ------------------------------------------------------ ,---------------------A MOMENT OF JOY / LIKE THE BEAT OF A HEART +-----------------------+ | * | | . | | /| | | / | | |_____/ |______________| | | | | +-----------------------+ A brief moment in life is sometimes noticed as pure joy. Its where you just feel happy, content, and in love with the time you see passing in your mind. The people you are with, or those in your mind, the space in which you're in just feels right with a recognition the universe gave you this great feeling. When I sit with my children and they are content, happy, and explore-a-tive, finding what I've seen hundreds of times, they see as new and interesting. My daughter sees the emblem on the side of the bath tub as something intriguing to explore. She grasps at it, with a smile and excitement. I tell her its embossed, she looks over at me for a moment smiles with a big grin and is back to work at investigating our world. Its a great joy to share these moments with her. These feelings don't last long, the time with my son, my daughter, my wife, at times rain tears in my eyes knowing they won't be with me forever, and longing for them to stay, but with each blissful moment of joy, takes lots of work to achieve like a thirst in summer not a drop from months it doesn't always seem worth it, but if I hold out long enough without warning they appear. I thank my wife for giving me these times, and the universe for leading me to her. At seven months old my children are starting to explore their world. My son can't crawl but he can roll, and he uses what he knows, so he rolls all over from place to place in his home. He rolls to the pillow leaning against the side table protecting his head from hitting the corners, he pats the pillow, testing it, checking what it is. In his room when he is on the floor he rolls to the diaper pale takes his hand and pats the pale a few times discovering what it might be. With his rolling he can move backwards on his belly pretty good. He rolls to the smooth floor puts his mouth on the floor, tastes it, and pushes backwards until he finds himself against a wall. He cries out to mom and dad for help. I pull him forward put his toys before him, a few moments of interest in the toy, a noise breaks his attention and he rolls in the direction of the sound to see what's going on. Along the way investigating what is there. Things like cat hair, pieces of cardboard from the cat scratcher, the interesting pattern on the rug. It must be a wonder to be about his house at seven months old. Our daughter, she doesn't like being on her stomach. All that time she spent with reflux has her in the habit of being on her back. That doesn't stop her though. She arches herself and kicks with her feet, inching her way across the floor to wherever she can get to. She finds herself under the tri-legged play area where different colored shapes are strung together hanging from the structure. She reach out and pulls at it, checking each one. A red crabbed shaped link is dangling she pulls at and frees from the rest of the chain, tastes it, then discards it as her attention draws back to the dangling chain of shapes. Their personalities are starting to show more. They realize they are not their mom. They smile big, cry, complain about little things like all of us do. They work on us trying to get us to do what they want. The other day my son and daughter in their beds, in their room speaking baby babble to each other. They sound happy. I walk into the room and my daughter sees me, and we make eye contact. She starts to make her crying sounds. I walk out as I tend to things to get ready for the day, her crying stops and she continues babbling with her brother. I again have to walk in the room, she sees me and starts to cry. I tell her, "noooo, I'm helping your brother." She cries more, and so I put her outside of her room. As I put her down she cries for a moment until I walk away and she can't see me. I peak out to see how she is doing, she doesn't notice me, I see she is happy as can be out there scooting around on the floor. She babbles to herself. I finish with her brother return for her, she sees me, starts to cry. I pick her up her crying stops as I bring her back into the room. She is fine as I hold her looking around from a parents vantage point. I laugh to myself, babies learn fast. Their world is simple, although they are limited, they do what they can to overcome those limitations through their parents. Funny how the peoples are, and wondrous. Our children have a physical therapist. The state helps assign one to babies born prematurely. The therapist said to me the other day, "her smile brings joy to my heart." Its true she really does that, she has that kind of smile. Like lots of babies do. Their wonderful personalities, smiles bring joy to our hearts. Their smiles are pure and innocent, and when a parent or adult sees it, its hard to deny. When I'm rested enough I get the awareness of these special moments the kind we live for. The kind people write about. I recognize them and express them trying to capture some part of each one. They are few and far between. Is it because I'm not attenuated to them? Perhaps I'm perpetually asleep, trapped within myself, misshapen by life's trauma. When the joy is so true it shows in my mind, all I can do is share what I thought brings it about. Maybe someone will read about it, catch the message, and have the courage to do as many of us have, risked it all to bring new lives, new humans to this world to show us what joy and sorry is, and recognize those moments of joy could be something the new ones bring more and more of to all beings in the world. Raising a family is hard but those pure moments will shine through. When they are here rejoice in them. If you are part of a family as we all are in some way find those times with someone anyone. I wish you all the best. :)