25

Feeling guilty about Iris long absence, Niou had paid an unannounced visit. Nakaokimi was determined to show no resentment. She had wanted to go off to Uji, and now she saw that the man who was to take her could not be depended upon. The world seemed to close in more tightly by the day. She must accept her fate, and greet whatever came, so long as she lived, with an appearance of cheerfulness. So successful was she in carrying through her resolve, so open and charming, that Niou's affection and delight rose to new heights. He apologized endlessly for his neglect. Her pregnancy was beginning to show, and the belt that was its mark and had been such a source of embarrassment the night before both moved and fascinated him, for he had never before been near a woman in her condition. Coming from the strained formality of Rokujo~, he felt pleasantly relaxed here at Nijo~, and his promises and apologies flowed on and on. What a very clever talker, thought Nakanokimi. The memory of Kaoru's alarming behavior came back. She was grateful to him, as she long had been, but he had gone too far. Though little inclined to put faith in Niou's vows, she found herself yielding before the flood. What a wretched position Kaoru had put her in, lulling her into a sense of security and then plunging into her room. He had said that his relations with her sister had been pure to the end, and she had believed and admired him; but it would not do to be too friendly. Apprehension turned to tenor at the thought of what a really prolonged separation from Niou might bring. She said nothing of her fears, and her manner, more girlishly endearing than ever, quite ravished him. And then he caught a telltale scent. It was not one of the scents that people purposely bum into their garments. Something of a connoisseur in such matters, Niou had no doubt about its origins.

“And what is this unusual perfume?”

She was speechless. It was true, then; something was going on be-tween the two of them. His heart was pounding. He had long been con-vinced that Kaoru's feelings went beyond friendliness. She had changed clothes and still that scent clung to her.

“Really, my dear, you cannot go on pretending that you have kept him at a distance.” His carefully measured speech left her feeling utterly helpless. “I have given you no cause, not the slightest, to doubt the intensity of my affection. _You_ are'the first to forget.'* I must accuse you, indeed, of bad taste—of forgetting what is expected of people like us. Perhaps you think I have stayed away long enough to justify what you have done. I have not, and I am deeply disappointed to find this strain of insensitivity.” His reproaches seemed endless, and were quite beyond transcribing. Her silence adding fuel to his rancor, he presently capped them with an accusing poem:

“Most friendly it was of him to give to your sleeve

The scent that maddens, sinks into the bones.”

It was too much. She had to reply.

“The familiar robe has been a source of comfort.

And now, for cause so paltry, must I lose it?”

The fragile, weeping figure could not fail to move him—and at the same time could not be permitted to escape responsibility for what had happened. His agitation increased until he too was in tears (for he had few defenses against tears). However terrible the mistake, it was not possible to cast her off. Such touching gentleness did not permit resentment to last, and soon he was seeking to comfort her.

He left Nijo~ the next morning after ablutions and a leisurely breakfast. Used to a blaze of Chinese and Korean hangings, to layer upon layer of damasks and brocades, he found the furnishings here intimate and reposeful, and her women, some of them in soft, unstarched robes, lent the place a quiet dignity. Nakanokimi herself was wearing a soft robe of lavender and over it a cloak of deep pink lined with blue. It was a quiet dress, and yet he thought her entirely capable of competing with the rather florid lady who, at Rokujo~, seemed almost vain in her attention to clothes. He was as susceptible to retiring beauty as to bold, and did not think that Nakanokimi had cause to feel inferior to her rival. She had had a charmingly round face, but emaciation and a new pallor had not spoiled its beauty. Even before he had caught that alarming scent, he had been aware of an unsettling possibility: given the quiet charms that so raised her above the ordinary, any man not a close relative would have had trouble staying away once he had come to know her. Niou knew all too well what his own inclinations would have been, and he was always ready to judge others by himself. And so he had for some time made it a practice to go nonchalantly through this cabinet and that chest in search of evidence. He had found nothing suspicious. There were, to be sure, brief, matter-of-fact notes mixed in among other papers, though not in such a manner as to suggest a particular wish to preserve them. There had to be more somewhere. The absence of letters and the presence of that perfume made a particularly alarming combination. When Kaoru was drawn to someone he was drawn irresistibly. Would Nakanokimi be capable of repulsing him? They were a good match, and no doubt they had much in common. Niou was sad, angry, jealous, too much a prey to these various emotions to leave her. He sent off two and three apologetic letters to Rokujo~. It did not take him long to think of new things to say, grumbled some of the old women.