(C) Daily Kos This story was originally published by Daily Kos and is unaltered. . . . . . . . . . . When You Run Out of Rabbits [1] ['Greg Dworkin', 'Chloris Creator', 'Belinda Ridgewood', 'Bill In Portland Maine'] Date: 2026-10-08 I have been a caregiver twice in a my life once for six years to my mother and once for 12 years to a younger brother. Caregiving is rewarding and extremely hard at the same time. It is rewarding because you are helping others and also exhausting 24/7 365/366 with multiple challenges. Mother never took care of herself. She barely ate. My older brother Mike lived with her but as Dad used to say he was an intellectual idiot, book smart with no common sense. After Dad died I was the one Mom called in crises. The man who did the roof did a shoddy job. A strongly worded letter to the Better Business Bureau from me fixed the problem. Mom became too weak to walk so I took my digital camera and went out and took pictures and printed them out for her. I took care of problems. I took care of the house. She died at 3 in the morning. I know the time because her cat Pixie became mine and she would wake me up at 3AM to make sure I hadn’t left her. I took care of selling the house and furniture and dividing it among the siblings. Mike was supposed to take care of it and I moved down to North Carolina to help his only child and her children. He drank himself to death trying to drown the horrors of Vietnam. I took over selling the house. Back in North Carolina I brought my brother Reid out from California. He was the forgotten kid. Mike was the oldest and Mom’s favorite. Eric was the talented and good looking one. Jerry the spoiled rotten baby. I was the only girl and the work horse. Reid was a brittle diabetic who didn’t take care of himself. He was 5’5″ and 95 pounds when he first came out. I learned to cook diabetic and heart healthy since we lost both parents to heart attacks. I got his weight up to 145 and made sure he took his insulin daily. Still so many years of neglect took its toll. He was constantly in and out of the hospital. I discovered the fastest way to get his blood sugar up during crashes was Karo syrup. His doctor once told him “I don’t think you realize what an angel she is.” I chuckled to myself because I knew the halo was held up my devil horns. I got help in bathing him and helping him excercise. He still ended up losing both legs. I cleaned him and his port a potty. I cleaned floors when he couldn’t position the urinal properly. I put up with temper tantrums. Reid was a morning bird and I am a night owl. I set up coffee the night before since he was addicted to television during the day and computer music at night. I would pull up his favorite music at night. When he was on the computer or sleeping at night I turned to music I loved. I am a huge Queen fan. I love Josh Groban, Celine Dion, Celtic Women, Lorena McKennit. I read a lot. I love mysteries. I have a perfect score on Agatha Christie. I haven’t guessed one right yet. I love Stephen King. It is important as a caregiver that you dedicate some me time to yourself. You have to decompress and recharge your batteries. The hardest thing about caregiving is the end. You are caring for someone who is ill. There are a finite number of rabbits available to pull out of your hat. Every caregiver is allocated a certain number of rabbits but you never know the actual number of them. The time will come when you run out. It took a long time to realize that I didn’t fail Reid. I pulled him through 12 years he wouldn’t have had. I didn’t fail him I just ran out of rabbits. It still hurts though. [END] --- [1] Url: https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2026/10/8/800109264/community/when/ Published and (C) by Daily Kos Content appears here under this condition or license: Site content may be used for any purpose without permission unless otherwise specified. via Magical.Fish Gopher News Feeds: gopher://magical.fish/1/feeds/news/dailykos/