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Hannibal Lecter is Having Me Over For Dinner [1]

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Date: 2025-04-22  

Imagine my surprise when just last week, an email arrived in my inbox inviting me over for dinner with none other than Dr. Hannibal Lecter — that’s right, ME! Needless to say, I was floored as it’s not every day that someone like Dr. Lecter wants to have someone like me for dinner.

Now to be clear, I’m not an advocate of serial killing OR cannibalism, but I have a keen enthusiasm for forensic psychiatry and as everyone knows, Dr. Lecter is the Michelin-Starred Chef of the practice, so I smashed the reply button and responded in all caps with three exclamation points: YES!!!

Much to my surprise, when I started to tell my friends and family about the dinner engagement, they all looked at me like I was crazy — “but he’s a serial killer” they said, “but he’s a cannibal” they said. To which I replied, sure, but he’s also like, super smart!

It was no surprise that Dr. Lecter replied almost immediately with a warm and welcoming message, which of course tendered me up right away — but the best part was that he said he was planning a special menu and get this, he said I’m in the inspiration for all of it — from the appetizer to the main course! And like a true gentleman, when I offered to bring some wine, he politely declined and told me that he had already selected a nice chianti!

I’m not sure I’ve ever been more excited in my entire life — Dr. Lecter is having ME over for dinner! I’m still looking for the perfect outfit and practicing my conversational skills — and I’m trying some new foods to expand my palate e.g., last night I made fava beans. Interestingly enough, Dr. Lecter suggested I try a nice soak in a tub full of olive oil and herbs (he said it’s like a marinade for the body), so I’m saving that for the day before our dinner. Oh and Dr. Lecter was also nice enough to buy me a train ticket to Baltimore — just one way, but I figured I can cover the return trip.

Dinner is next month and I’m sure I’ll have a lot to report, so stay tuned!

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