(C) Daily Kos This story was originally published by Daily Kos and is unaltered. . . . . . . . . . . Political Discussions for Thanksgiving? Don’t "Talk" – Just Ask Questions. [1] ['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.'] Date: 2024-11-27 There is a lot of talk about how to avoid talking about politics over this Thanksgiving. Are we that desperate that we are willing to give up on lost loved ones and the discourse that is necessary and vital to our capacity for self-rule, just for a few extra moments of pretend “peace?” Or can we use the opportunity of the holiday and the power of our intellects to try to reach the lost, hopefully with better technique, and try to save our floundering democracy? As Americans, we should know that we can’t simply "agree to disagree". That's equivalent to giving up on our civil discourse, the very engine that drives our ability to self-rule. As Americans we must pursue the truth and challenge and educate each other until we ACTUALLY AGREE. That is how we build the consensus that moves our democratic society forward to solutions we can all get behind. That is how our system works, and without that, it doesn't work. It's America's enemies who want the discourse that drives our ability to reach consensus neutralized, so we devolve and fall into dysfunctional tribalism. The lie that “democracy” is the majority bulldozing over and ruling oppressively over minorities. That is where we find ourselves today. When WE no longer do the work of building consensus, the democracy part of our republic fails. So what do we do when so many Americans have been conditioned and hardened against actual intelligent discourse? We apply our collective intelligence to the problem. In this case how to best reach our loved ones this holiday. I’ll share what I have learned, and I invite anyone with additional insights to share them in the comments. To reach anyone – UNDERSTANDING is the key. First, understand this: There are two main obstacles that impede our discourse with MAGA folks: #1. Their goal is to “win.” Not to understand the truth. #2. Many don’t actually understand why truth is better than lies to begin with, hence #1 Just understanding those two things about them should make them a lot less baffling. Then, apply this knowledge. I find, when you catch them arguing both sides of an argument, as they almost invariably do in order to “win,” that’s when you have to ask them to plant their feet and declare WHAT THEY ACTUALLY BELIEVE. Only when they are willing to do that can you begin to have an honest discussion. So tip #1 is to ASK QUESTIONS. Ask them what THEY BELIEVE. Harden yourself to resist the urge to tell them what you believe, or show them how much better informed you are. That will get you nowhere. Make your goal just to have an honest discussion about what THEY actually believe. Tell them you don’t care what Trump or Tucker Carlson says. Bring everything back to asking them to plant their feet and take a stand in their own actual belief. They will likely be resistant. Refusing to take a clear stand, much like Trump does, is their key to “winning.” Understand this about them – they may not know much, but they do know that they are tired of losing, and want to win. It’s why so many supported Trump. Because nearly all Americans, collectively, have been “losing” since Reagan. So that may be the end of the discussion. “How can we have an honest discussion if you won’t tell me what you actually believe?” Or “When you are willing to tell me what YOU believe, let’s discuss it then.” But if they are willing, just keep asking questions. “What do you think…?” “What do you believe…?” Know that with each answer, you are getting them to THINK. Getting them to consider what they ACTUALLY BELIEVE. You are bringing them back and turning them into actual Americans again – people who think and believe. And people want to be heard. Especially by loved ones. Today, more than ever, we will need our ties and family and community. You don’t have to convince them overnight that they supported a fascist. You can’t. Only they can come to that realization. And you should understand that will take time and will be incredibly difficult. So don’t expect any of that. Just do what you can to help them reclaim some of themselves. Wishing you all a great Thanksgiving, and that you can truly be there for each other. [END] --- [1] Url: https://dailykos.com/stories/2024/11/27/2289043/-Political-Discussions-for-Thanksgiving-Don-t-Talk-Just-Ask-Questions?pm_campaign=front_page&pm_source=more_community&pm_medium=web Published and (C) by Daily Kos Content appears here under this condition or license: Site content may be used for any purpose without permission unless otherwise specified. via Magical.Fish Gopher News Feeds: gopher://magical.fish/1/feeds/news/dailykos/