[HN Gopher] Having Kids (2019)
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Having Kids (2019)
        
       Author : Anon84
       Score  : 132 points
       Date   : 2026-03-20 14:56 UTC (8 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (paulgraham.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (paulgraham.com)
        
       | yanis_t wrote:
       | Having kids is a gift. But this is one of these kinds of
       | knowledge that once you know you immediately can't explain to
       | others who don't.
        
         | ozarkerD wrote:
         | Great way of putting it. It's the sort of thing you just have
         | to trust others and jump into. If you think about it too much
         | it just doesn't make sense.
        
         | drfloyd51 wrote:
         | Love. Kids. Marriage. Divorce. Heartbreak. Death of a close
         | partner.
         | 
         | Things you can't explain to other people. But others with the
         | experience just know.
        
         | fdghrtbrt wrote:
         | I understand the idea but I take issue with the wording.
         | 
         | I CAN explain to others who don't. It's just that most of the
         | time others aren't interested in hearing.
        
         | Cerium wrote:
         | A good friend of mine holds the belief that "having friends
         | with kids is better than having kids of your own", and I
         | definitely feel the "can't explain" part - there is an
         | unexplainable reality when you have kids of your own.
        
           | NoGravitas wrote:
           | I'm also told that being a grandparent is a lot better than
           | being a parent - you can give them back.
        
         | matsemann wrote:
         | My problem with that wording is that it comes across a bit
         | arrogant or "I know better". I think many people _do_
         | understand what you mean even if they don't have kids, they're
         | just not that interested in those parts of life, which also
         | should be fair.
        
           | saghm wrote:
           | At one of my earliest jobs (I must have been 19), I had a
           | boss who was incredulous that I didn't drink alcohol and said
           | that I would when I was 21 because it was "part of being an
           | adult". I was pretty sure that making my own decisions rather
           | than letting myself get pressured by others into what they
           | assumed was best for me was a more important part of being an
           | adult, and over a decade later I still don't drink.
           | 
           | Comments like the parent one (pun semi-intended) basically
           | sound the same to me as what my boss had said to me that day.
           | Assuming that your own experience is universal is a flawed
           | way to view the world, even if your experience is relatively
           | common. If there are exceptions, it's not going to be easy to
           | see them if you have an assumption already about it being
           | universal, and if the people in the majority are loud enough
           | and annoying enough about it, those who aren't will be even
           | more incentivized not to share their experiences with you;
           | I'd argue that people who regret having kids will potentially
           | be reluctant to publicly say so. Most importantly, doing
           | something because of societal pressure rather than genuine
           | desire is going to greatly reduce the chance that someone
           | truly finds it fulfilling, and there's an emotional cost for
           | children who are raised by parents who basically regret
           | having them.
           | 
           | It's totally reasonable to say "I never truly understood how
           | much I'd enjoy having kids until I did, and I suspect it's
           | the same for a lot of other parents". There's no reason to go
           | further than that unless you're pushing an idealogy rather
           | than actually trying to say something you know is correct.
        
           | lou1306 wrote:
           | My problem with that problem is that, well, people who have
           | kids definitionally know (better?) about having them. Like
           | being able to experience a book in its original version vs a
           | translation.
           | 
           | It's okay if you don't want to learn Spanish, but when people
           | discuss the struggles and delights of reading Cien Anos de
           | Soledad they're not necessarily being arrogant, just stating
           | their lived experience.
        
             | matsemann wrote:
             | But do you also go around and claim everyone that hasn't
             | read that book in Spanish is losing out in life, or do you
             | also recognize it's just not for everyone?
        
         | genthree wrote:
         | Each one's a reverse-lottery-ticket, though. Get the wrong draw
         | and it's _not_ a gift. Can easily massively reduce the QOL for
         | everyone around, including other siblings.
         | 
         | Mostly due to chronic illnesses, of either the physical or
         | mental variety.
        
           | waynesonfire wrote:
           | There is significant suffering in the world. You and everyone
           | else are drawing lottery tickets everyday. Kids are far from
           | its only source or cause. I'm ill equipped to unpack the
           | meaning of life, but I am certain that suffering is
           | fundamental--your comment is probing at this idea.
           | 
           | This is a very difficult subject since there exists un-
           | imaginable suffering and it's hard to reconcile that. That
           | life is a gift under the umbrella of un-imaginable suffering.
           | Perhaps, that's what spirituality tries to do, I don't know.
        
             | genthree wrote:
             | I think a lot of folks don't consider that each child comes
             | with a high-enough-to-worry-about risk of negatively
             | affecting the life of everyone in your family to a level on
             | par with one of the adults in your family becoming
             | permanently and severely disabled relatively early in life.
             | 
             | Yeah sure we also risk some micromorts and the life-
             | altering-disability equivalent every time we drive a car or
             | get a sunburn, all right.
        
               | briHass wrote:
               | Amor fati.
        
       | meitham wrote:
       | As a father of 3, nothing is more satisfying than raising kids.
        
         | metalliqaz wrote:
         | As a father of 2, that really depends on a few factors.
         | 
         | I'd wager that you picked a good wife and that your kids are
         | healthy and bright.
         | 
         | Things can go from satisfying to draining real quick.
        
         | gdcbe wrote:
         | Father of three here as well, amen to that. Soo hard, but oh so
         | amazing.
        
         | rauljordan2020 wrote:
         | Kudos to you! I have one and it's been the hardest thing I've
         | ever done and it has broken us entirely. We can never imagine
         | having more than one given the difficulty, and are now finished
         | at one 100%. Very huge admiration for parents of > 1. It's 10x
         | the work and not just 2x the work
        
       | mring33621 wrote:
       | Having kids may not be for everyone, but it is the best thing
       | that I have ever done in my life.
        
       | dominotw wrote:
       | I am am so scared of losing my job in tech due to ai and not
       | being able to support my family.
        
         | vardump wrote:
         | Take a deep breath and just learn whatever you need to learn.
         | AI or otherwise.
         | 
         | You'll be fine. Being responsible for someone else gives you
         | quite a bit of boost.
        
           | sjkoelle wrote:
           | lets be real we are gonna lose our jobs to these kids
        
       | vardump wrote:
       | While there are always those lows, when the kids are sick,
       | scream, have tantrums, do something stupid, I would not trade a
       | second of that away. A lot of happiness and laughs as well, along
       | the way.
       | 
       | They grow and you're privileged to live with them for a while.
       | Also you'll grow with them.
       | 
       | Having kids was my best decision ever. Thrice.
        
       | Daneel_ wrote:
       | I also had kids, and while I love my kids I haven't loved
       | spending time with my kids. This will hopefully change as they
       | age, but the first six years have so far been very much a drag on
       | my life and productivity, and not much else. They haven't
       | provided fulfilment, and they haven't provided satisfaction. Some
       | joy is there from time to time, definitely, but nothing in the
       | way the author describes. Happiness for me typically starts after
       | my kids are in bed or when I can escape them during work hours.
       | My wife finds great happiness in our children, and I find
       | happiness in that, but I'm desperately waiting for my kids to be
       | old enough that I only need to spend time with them instead of
       | constantly caring for them. Sorry if this is a bit of a dark
       | comment, but I just wanted to say it's not always the experience
       | this author had, even if it seems common. Edit: Generally, I
       | regret having kids (because of the impact on my life, not the
       | kids themselves), but I also can't change that decision and I
       | would never back away from my choice - that's completely unfair
       | to them, as well as my wife. Such is life. I try to keep looking
       | forward to when they're older as a way of staying positive.
       | 
       | I truly do give my kids my all though, and they have a wonderful
       | life and are loved and cared for in all senses of those words.
       | They're great kids and I give them everything necessary to be a
       | great dad.
        
         | toomuchtodo wrote:
         | Do not despair, I felt the same. Mine are halfway to 18, still
         | feel the same, unsure if it changes. I love them, just not the
         | experience. I have friends who feel the same, so I/we are not
         | alone.
         | 
         | I tell others not to do it unless they are prepared to suffer.
         | You won't know if its for you until you've already gone through
         | the one way door. I wish others luck. For the unlucky, I wish
         | grit and stoicism.
        
           | fastball wrote:
           | Would be interesting to see if there is other personality
           | overlap with people that feel this way, which people could
           | use as a pre-test for whether or not they would enjoy the
           | experience of having kids.
           | 
           | I wonder if there would be something identifiable in common
           | if we fMRI'd your brains, as while you are definitely not
           | alone it does seem like a pretty strong exception that makes
           | the rule.
        
             | ivan_gammel wrote:
             | That could be something to put on Tinder profile.
        
               | toomuchtodo wrote:
               | Sure, give me a verified badge on dating marketplace apps
               | (Feeld, Fetlife in my case) based on my fMRI imaging
               | interpretation. Use it as input for the matching algo.
               | Way more useful than simply putting "neurodivergent" in a
               | profile imho. Adjacent to "If your policy doesn't exist
               | in code, it doesn't exist."
        
         | doubled112 wrote:
         | If it makes you feel any better, you're not the only one that
         | feels that way. I don't think it's said very often because it
         | almost feels taboo to say it.
        
           | swed420 wrote:
           | Apparently there are even private Facebook groups dedicated
           | to this purpose.
        
           | cortesoft wrote:
           | Sometimes I feel like there is this sense that you are a bad
           | parent if you ever express that there are times you might
           | wish you weren't a parent, even if the feeling is much more
           | "I wish I didn't have to be a parent RIGHT NOW". You can even
           | see in this thread that people are expressing how they feel
           | sorry for the commenter's children because he feels regret
           | sometimes about being a parent.
           | 
           | I wanted to be a dad more than anything in the world, and I
           | absolutely love my kids and I love being a dad.
           | 
           | Most of the time.
           | 
           | There is a TON of things you have to do as a parent that
           | objectively sucks, and you have to do it no matter how you
           | are feeling and no matter what else you also have to do. It
           | is impossible not to feel trapped, at times, by the
           | understanding that it never ends, that you are a parent
           | 24/7/365.25 and that your kids dominate your life. I don't
           | care how much you love your kids, you are going to feel that
           | sometimes (or you are so strongly into the self-denial that
           | you force yourself to pretend you always like it).
           | 
           | That doesn't mean you aren't a good parent, or even that you
           | made the right choice to be a parent. Most of the best things
           | in life involve sacrifice, and doing things you don't want to
           | have to do, and powering through even when you want to give
           | up. It's cliche, but the struggle makes the rewards even
           | sweeter. Doesn't mean the struggle doesn't suck sometimes,
           | and you might want to give up, and you have to use all your
           | self-control tricks to maintain.
           | 
           | I feel even worse for parents who did IVF or other fertility
           | treatments, or who adopt. In my conversations with some close
           | friends who are in those situations, they talk about how much
           | pressure they feel to never complain when it is hard. They
           | spent a ton of money and effort and used insurance money and
           | many doctors and procedures (or all the interviews and
           | inspections and money for adoption) so they could have kids,
           | and now they want to complain about being a parent? Of
           | course, they still have all the same struggles and pains and
           | nostalgia for their before life, no matter how much this is
           | what they want.
           | 
           | Anyway, I am not sure what my point is. I just want people to
           | be honest with themselves, and other parents and future
           | parents, about what the entire parenting experience really
           | is. Sometimes I think parents don't want to scare potential
           | parents off of being parents, which I think is understandable
           | but overstated. There is simply no way to convey to non-
           | parents what it is actually like to be a parent, and this
           | applies to both the good and bad things. I thought my wife
           | and I were prepared and knowledgeable and ready, and we were
           | to the extent we could be. But so many things we imagined
           | about what it would be like is not the reality at all, but
           | even if we had a Time Machine I couldn't explain to my
           | previous self what it is actually like. You just have to
           | experience it... if you want to. I would never tell people
           | they should have kids, because it is such an all-encompassing
           | thing that everyone has to decide for themselves... all
           | without knowing what it will actually be like.
           | 
           | It is a hell of an adventure, though.
        
         | fdghrtbrt wrote:
         | I would like to hear in what sense you love your kids, given
         | that "he first six years have so far been very much a drag on
         | my life and productivity, and not much else. They haven't
         | provided fulfilment, and they haven't provided satisfaction.
         | (...) Happiness for me typically starts after my kids are in
         | bed or when I can escape them during work hours."
         | 
         | Do you say "I love my kids" because that's what everybody says,
         | or is there any truth in it?
         | 
         | EDIT: Just to be 100% clear: I mean absolutely no judgement.
         | I'm not going to tell you off or try to change your mind. I ask
         | out of pure curiosity.
        
           | Daneel_ wrote:
           | I go above and beyond to give them a great life - to care
           | about providing them with a rich education, as well as a wide
           | variety of life experiences, to immerse them in quality time
           | with friends and family, to travel with them and spend time
           | amongst various cultures and amongst nature. I'm there for
           | them whenever they need me, and also when they don't. I take
           | the time to give genuine answers, to feed their curiosity, to
           | make them great people. I give them the tools to explore
           | things on their own and foster their independence. I also
           | encourage risk taking while supporting them when it doesn't
           | work out.
           | 
           | Critically: I give them my full attention.
           | 
           | I could choose to spend all that mental effort on myself, but
           | I choose to spend it on them. That's as good a demonstration
           | of love as any, in my book anyway.
           | 
           | Edit: no offence taken! I didn't interpret it that way at
           | all.
        
             | majkinetor wrote:
             | You are overdoing it. Don't know who is your role model,
             | but that behavior is IMO what leads to that outcome.
             | 
             | Show mostly by example, not by direct mentoring.
             | 
             | What rich education and various cultures for 6-year-olds
             | (or less)? That is simply irrelevant at that age and
             | logistics of it just makes you hate everything. Do you even
             | take your kids to dozen of arbitrary chosen classes?
             | 
             | Tone it down, everybody will feel better and you won't have
             | to fake it. Happy parent is more important for family than
             | robo parent.
        
               | Daneel_ wrote:
               | It's not forced, and we do show by example. I also
               | disagree that they're too young to be immersed in a love
               | for education, culture, and people. Oh and music too. We
               | listen to a lot of music (for fun!).
               | 
               | My family and friends are multi-cultural so they're
               | naturally exposed to several cultures, for example. It's
               | also important to my wife and I as the world itself is
               | multi-cultural, so having an appreciation that different
               | people live their lives differently is important. We lead
               | by example simply by living in a multi-cultural life and
               | embracing it.
               | 
               | Take that same approach and apply it across the rest of
               | the points I made. Nothing is forced, I promise.
        
               | fdghrtbrt wrote:
               | What a rude thing to say. Different people raise their
               | kids differently. There's nothing wrong with that answer.
        
               | majkinetor wrote:
               | It's you who are being rude by not allowing opinions. I
               | am trying to help. I might be right or wrong or somewhere
               | in between (which is all perfectly OK) but its on OP to
               | judge it by himself if my words have any meaning for him.
               | I said them because I noticed the pattern around me.
               | Please stop with the drama.
        
               | fdghrtbrt wrote:
               | You're the one making drama. "nooo kids don't need a
               | robot parent" lol
        
           | rootusrootus wrote:
           | > Do you say "I love my kids" because that's what everybody
           | says, or is there any truth in it?
           | 
           | It is true that some people are not really cut out to be
           | parents. But unfortunately it is difficult to tell whether
           | that will be you or not. I see people looking at comments in
           | threads like this and then chiming in with sentiments along
           | the lines of "see, this is why I never wanted to be a
           | parent." There is no way to know that, and such statements
           | strike me as cope. Becoming a parent changes you, but you
           | won't know how until you do it. There is a lot of biology and
           | psychology in play, for certain.
           | 
           | As I tell my own kids, however, be careful because you only
           | get to become a parent _one_ time. Cannot blame someone for
           | opting out of the risk, even if the counterfactual is that
           | they would have been amazing parents with amazing children
           | and been much happier.
        
         | ozarkerD wrote:
         | I can definitely relate. There's nights my wife and I get to
         | bed and sorta just look at eachother and go "what the hell was
         | that". Those days are hard.
         | 
         | I find the days that I forget myself and throw myself into
         | trying to be a good dad are the days I find joy in fatherhood.
         | Weekends especially I try to forget the stresses of work and
         | productivity and everything else and try to spend as much time
         | with them as possible. Playing, teaching, and learning with
         | them.
         | 
         | Not saying it's universal. Just a datapoint from me.
        
         | rybosworld wrote:
         | I think this is a fairly common experience but many people are
         | afraid to admit it.
        
         | Foobar8568 wrote:
         | I enjoyed much more the first 6 years than the following 6
         | ones.
         | 
         | Seeing them grow was fun, seeing them turning teenagers is a
         | pain.
        
         | iamwil wrote:
         | The quip I keep going back to is: "All joy, no fun."
        
         | hudon wrote:
         | The single folk envy the married and the married envy the
         | singles. Life is suffering either way.
        
         | synergy20 wrote:
         | I have a few kids, raising them is a mix of good and bad, like
         | everything else. it took a toll on my career, pushed my temper
         | to the edge, and stressed me out all these 20+ years, but I
         | also enjoyed many moments. it does not go away when they got
         | older by the way, it's a life long strong bond, at different
         | phases there are different challenges.
         | 
         | If I have a second life, I don't know what to do though, I
         | probably will first make enough money before having kids at
         | least.
        
           | jasonkester wrote:
           | _I probably will first make enough money before having kids
           | at least._
           | 
           | I think you've hit the key difference.
           | 
           | I waited until I was 40 before having kids, and it just feels
           | like I'm doing it on easy mode.
           | 
           | We had time and money sorted out, and tons of free baby stuff
           | donated from all our friends who had done it already.
           | 
           | It's still lots of work, but you're at a place in life where
           | you can handle it. I can't imagine trying to raise kids in my
           | 20s, with my crappy stressful office job and no money in my
           | little studio apartment.
           | 
           | Hats off to anybody who can do that.
        
             | eloisant wrote:
             | On the flip side, you'll still have a 20yo university
             | student to take care of at age 60, while all your friends
             | will have an independent adult child earlier...
        
               | warmonger wrote:
               | I see no issues with that. I don't think that your
               | friends should decide your parenting plans.
        
           | tayo42 wrote:
           | That's funny becasue if I could do it again I'd have my kids
           | younger.
        
         | raincole wrote:
         | I mean, the birth rate is decreasing everywhere for a reason.
        
           | loloquwowndueo wrote:
           | "A" reason?
           | 
           | Given the post you're replying to, it seems you're implying a
           | specific reason, but what if it's a different one? How about
           | "I love children but having kids is super expensive"?
        
             | raincole wrote:
             | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Income_and_fertility
             | 
             | > There is generally an inverse correlation between
             | monetary income and the total fertility rate within and
             | between nations.
             | 
             | https://www.statista.com/statistics/241530/birth-rate-by-
             | fam...
             | 
             | > In 2021, the birth rate in the United States was highest
             | in families that had under 10,000 U.S. dollars in income
             | per year
             | 
             | And a few thousands more links.
        
               | dominotw wrote:
               | > How about "I love children but having kids is super
               | expensive"?
               | 
               | always surprises me when ppl say this when they clearly
               | observe the opposite in action. whats going on here.
        
               | doubled112 wrote:
               | Every mouth to feed costs more. Baby formula seems like a
               | racket. Diapers are expensive.
               | 
               | My oldest will need a laptop for school next year. It
               | isn't optional or provided.
               | 
               | Maybe you need a bigger car because car seats take up a
               | lot of room.
               | 
               | What if your kid decides they want to join a sports team?
               | A friend of a friend told me they did the math on a year
               | of competitive swimming. It was $10,000 by the time they
               | were done with equipment and travel.
               | 
               | A trip to the dentist for my family of four is about
               | $1000 for just cleanings. Braces for my oldest were $3000
               | if I could pay cash or $4000 to finance. You could skip
               | dental care, but some might consider that neglect.
               | 
               | What if the school tells you to get your child tested?
               | That costs about $3000 in my part of the world. Half of
               | the kids on my block are neurodivergent somehow. What do
               | you do?
               | 
               | In a less well off part of the world, most of these
               | "concerns" probably disappear. I think we have pretty
               | high expectations of parents that aren't poor.
        
               | knorker wrote:
               | Your arguments (explanations?) would seem way more
               | relevant if they didn't go 100% counter to observation.
               | 
               | I don't know why you're trying to explain an outcome that
               | is opposite of the observed outcome.
               | 
               | Are you saying that while more money is correlated with
               | less fertility (the fact), that somehow _even more money_
               | will reverse the trend and start going the other way?
               | 
               | Based on observed data, one could almost make the case
               | that if only billionaires start stealing from the poor
               | even more, then birth rates should go up.
        
               | doubled112 wrote:
               | It wasn't really supposed to be about money vs fertility
               | rates. I was trying to provide some observed examples of
               | why having more money might mean more expensive kids. Or
               | how being poor means the cost and expectations are lower.
               | 
               | I've always believed that it isn't money itself, but
               | access to healthcare and education that lower fertility
               | rates. Money correlates really strongly with access to
               | healthcare and education.
               | 
               | Having good education and healthcare leads to birth
               | control and maybe an abortion if the BC fails.
               | 
               | When a family of three is making $15K a year, do you
               | believe baby four, five and six were planned out in
               | agonizing detail? Or do you think maybe they weren't
               | planned at all?
               | 
               | And I do believe more money going around would help. If
               | the perspective is "I can't afford it", those who are
               | doing OK will not have children if they can help it.
        
               | eloisant wrote:
               | The highest income you have, the more pressured you are
               | to give them an expensive education, activities, etc.
               | Everyone want their kids to do at least as well as
               | themselves.
               | 
               | So it's expensive no matter what income bracket you're
               | in.
        
             | microtonal wrote:
             | Yeah, I don't envy the 30 year olds who can't buy an house
             | because it's become unaffordable, made even harder by many
             | only getting freelance jobs.
             | 
             | Also: having many children used to be an insurance policy,
             | but as countries become more developed it's less necessary.
        
           | phatfish wrote:
           | The reason isn't because it is more difficult or people enjoy
           | having kids less (like the parent). Its because children used
           | to be a way to provide security for your family and
           | community. More hands to help or sent off to earn money
           | younger for example.
           | 
           | Now with smaller family units and less community interaction
           | they represent a risk to security, mainly financially.
        
             | mothballed wrote:
             | Children still provide security for the family and
             | community, it's just that it's done in a way where the
             | people creating the benefit and the people realizing it are
             | almost entirely different. This is due to the way social
             | security works. Creating a tragedy of the commons where
             | everyone wants more kids but no one wants to be the sucker
             | that has them (from the financial viewpoint, obviously not
             | from others). Obviously this sort of communism where
             | society takes the profits in form of social security but
             | provides almost nil (except some pittances in property
             | taxes for school) for the investment creates a collapsing
             | system.
             | 
             | Having children for yourself provides more security for
             | _all the other_ families but barely anymore for your own.
             | Meanwhile you bear _most_ the costs and everyone else bears
             | very little. So the incentives are totally reversed, and
             | even worse the coupling between investment in children and
             | payoff is cut which means the people in the best position
             | to help their kids be successful are the least incentivized
             | to do so.
        
         | FunnyLookinHat wrote:
         | I think it's important to share the difficult / hard
         | experiences of having kids as much as the good ones. I've
         | noticed that there is a huge bias towards only sharing the good
         | moments and white-washing all of the bad as something you can
         | "laugh about later." To be frank, not enough people were honest
         | with me about what it would be like having kids before I had
         | them - and I was incredibly upset when I realized that (several
         | years into being a parent).
         | 
         | I now make it a point to be honest with people when they ask
         | "Should we have kids?" and tell them about how hard it can be,
         | etc. Most importantly, I tell people that they shouldn't have
         | kids unless they would still want to do it if their experience
         | doesn't land in the middle of the bell curve. We tend to
         | romanticize the decision, and expect that everything "just gets
         | even better" with kids. There are all sorts of ways your
         | experience can be less than ideal. Unless you're evaluating
         | your decision with those potential outcomes in mind, you're
         | doing yourself, your partner, and even your future children a
         | disservice.
        
         | microtonal wrote:
         | Interesting, my experience has been the opposite. Before
         | getting kids, I thought that I would only enjoy having kids
         | once they were the age where you could have conversations with
         | them, etc., that the first one or two years were more something
         | that mothers would like. But for me it was not like that at
         | all, aside from some sleepless nights, it's so cool to be part
         | of them discovering the world.
         | 
         |  _have so far been very much a drag on my life and
         | productivity, and not much else_
         | 
         | At some point when our kid was still young, I started working
         | 4/5 FTE, taking the afternoons off after ~14:00. I feel like
         | that provided a lot of mental space. Since I was working part-
         | time, I did not feel bad/guilty about not working the
         | afternoons and I would be focused on being very productive from
         | 8:30 to 14:00. The free hours were for doing stuff together or
         | accommodating their playdates (picking up from school, ensuring
         | the house doesn't get torn down).
         | 
         | Now they are an age where they want to do things without
         | parents, so I am working full-time again, but do miss those
         | early days where she would be with me in her seat on my bike
         | and we'd cycle to the city and she'd be singing aloud from joy.
         | 
         | But every person is different and I think that there are also
         | parents that start enjoying having kids more when they are
         | older. So, your years may still come :).
         | 
         |  _dark comment_
         | 
         | My dark comment would be: we are all learning on the job and I
         | feel like I could do some things better with the experience I
         | have now.
        
         | gib444 wrote:
         | I admire your frank honesty
         | 
         | > Generally, I regret having kids
         | 
         | Please don't ever, ever let them know this, or even allow them
         | to figure it out. Especially before they're at least ~30 and
         | able to begin to understand.
        
           | Daneel_ wrote:
           | I would never let them think I regret them - that's such a
           | cruel thing to inflict upon them, and it's certainly not
           | their fault. I also don't regret the joy it's brought my
           | wife.
           | 
           | I regret the loss of my mental energy and personal time, but
           | not them, if that makes sense.
        
             | gib444 wrote:
             | > that's such a cruel thing to inflict upon them
             | 
             | It certainly is. Speaking from personal experience. And he
             | let me know in a very direct and cruel way.
        
               | Daneel_ wrote:
               | I'm genuinely sorry to hear that.
               | 
               | I make sure my kids know I love them in many, many ways.
        
             | karmakurtisaani wrote:
             | For me it helped to realize that the things I would have
             | done with the extra time and energy would not have been
             | that great. Some occasional dopamine bursts for a very
             | mediocre outcome. Having kids is a better investment, but a
             | less fun one.
        
         | bcrosby95 wrote:
         | Having kids becomes a lot easier if you can do the things you
         | enjoy with them. For me that includes all sorts of stuff such
         | as D&D, warhammer, painting miniatures, drawing, magic the
         | gathering, board games, etc. I also include them when I have to
         | fix something around the house or some random electronic device
         | that broke.
         | 
         | If the only thing you can enjoy is adult stuff or working then
         | you might have a rougher time at it if you don't find joy in
         | the pure act of raising a kid. For me the first few months were
         | meh, but once they started to get a personality I found it more
         | entertaining.
        
           | Daneel_ wrote:
           | Many of those are things I greatly enjoy, as well as many
           | other things from a very diverse range of hobbies. My kids
           | aren't old enough to join in on those things yet (6 and 4),
           | so I only find time to do those things once every few months,
           | as opposed to once or twice a week pre-kids. It's improving
           | as they get older though, hence my hopefulness.
        
         | vorpalhex wrote:
         | Your experience is the opposite of mine.
         | 
         | I can't wait to play with my 3 year old and 1 year old. I get
         | so mad at work when I have an odd late meeting because it is
         | keeping me from them.
         | 
         | My three year old helps me build furniture (he gets screws
         | started, counts out parts, helps apply glue). I love showing
         | him synths and instruments and seeing his face light up.
         | 
         | My one year old is a cuddle monster who likes listening to jazz
         | with me. She also really enjoys when the cat climbs up on our
         | lap and she gets to pet it.
         | 
         | I don't know your situation, but most miserable parents I know
         | see their kid as something to manage, like some kind of
         | annoying work underling.
         | 
         | I see my kids as little detectives.
         | 
         | My goal isn't to solve their case or even help them approach it
         | in the right way. It's to give them an occasional hint (or step
         | stool), keep them from danger, and help them discover the
         | correct way to behave.
        
         | lukevp wrote:
         | Thank you for posting this. It's totally understandable and
         | believable that you simultaneously love them and regret some
         | things about it. There's this insane pressure in our society to
         | never acknowledge the toll that kids have and to never speak
         | out about this. I remember when this article was first posted
         | and how I received it, like I was wrong for not being sure
         | about kids, and that some change would come over me when I had
         | them. Truth is, that doesn't happen with everyone. Then the
         | world tries to gaslight those people who don't feel that way
         | into feeling like they're broken somehow.
         | 
         | I'm sure you love your kids and take great care of them, and
         | it's not your fault that you feel this way.
         | 
         | It would benefit all of us if this taboo was lifted, so that we
         | could speak truthfully about the impact of kids on families,
         | and maybe then we'd have to provide more support and
         | encouragement to convince people to have them. Not everyone has
         | free daycare from their grandparents or a large social network
         | to babysit or the finances that make having a child less of a
         | burden.
        
         | peacebeard wrote:
         | Everyone is different, and even though I don't share your
         | experience, I don't view yours as either good or bad, it just
         | is what it is. My experience is different but I'm not planning
         | on ever telling anyone "Oh don't worry about it just have kids
         | it'll be the best experience of your life" in blind faith.
        
         | nxor2 wrote:
         | It's mysterious to me that you write all this _and_ that you do
         | truly love your kids and are great. If I was in your position
         | I'd at least concede that people do deserve parents that don't
         | regret them. Do their thoughts toward it even matter?
        
           | Daneel_ wrote:
           | I think people deserve parents that give a damn. And I do
           | give a damn. Several in fact. It just doesn't make me happy.
        
         | cortesoft wrote:
         | While I have always loved being a dad, I can certainly relate
         | to the things you describe.
         | 
         | I will say that a lot of those issues have gotten better as
         | they have gotten older (they are now 10 and almost 7). They
         | don't require the same level of constant attention that they
         | used to, they are getting more and more interesting to talk to,
         | and have developed interesting personalities and senses of
         | humor.
        
           | Daneel_ wrote:
           | I'm glad to hear that - it backs up what I'm hoping/expecting
           | will happen. I think I'll enjoy time with them much more as
           | they age, especially once they're 7+.
        
         | eloisant wrote:
         | The curse of parenting is that when they're small you can't
         | wait for them to grow up so you can get more time for you, and
         | when they grow up you're nostalgic of their childhood when they
         | were willing to spend more time with you.
         | 
         | So my advice is: find activities to do with them that you would
         | both enjoy. Maybe going to parks, museums, have them help you
         | on house chores... You only have a few years left under they
         | get to middle school and start becoming more distant.
        
         | artyom wrote:
         | You're not alone and I'll even say this is evolutionary.
         | 
         | Men haven't evolved to be overly attached to babies or small
         | kids like mothers did - that'd have been a weakness in the
         | survival race. Men skills were completely different, usually
         | related to being _away_ from the kids most of the time.
         | 
         | Translate to modern day, that is men not really wanting to have
         | kids (sometimes just going along with the wife's biological
         | clock), and pretty much "feeling nothing" when the kids are
         | born. There's a million documented examples of that.
         | 
         | However, once kids leave the "little puppy" phase and grow
         | beyond the basic needs care that mothers provide, it's when the
         | fathers start to really relate to them.
         | 
         | If your older kid is maybe 5-6 you're about to start that new
         | phase. That's what happened to me, and I find (maybe not so
         | extreme) examples of that on almost every guy I talk to.
         | 
         | Give it a second chance, maybe having kids is just not for you.
         | But don't assume it's already the case, you may miss out whole
         | new world.
        
         | orochimaaru wrote:
         | Kids need to be out of the house and so do you. From the 2 kids
         | I have (currently teen/tween) outdoors - as in unpaved trails,
         | state parks or such if you have them close by - were the best.
         | 
         | They find enough there to keep themselves entertained. It's
         | amazing how much interest deer poop can generate.
        
       | drfloyd51 wrote:
       | Before kids it was easy to judge bad parents. Then one day with
       | child I found myself due to circumstances in a store way past my
       | child's bedtime. She was screaming and crying, because it was way
       | past her bedtime.
       | 
       | Then I realized... I was now "the bad parent" I had so easily
       | judged.
       | 
       | Then it was easy to judge parents with children younger than
       | mine.
       | 
       | Until I learned that not all children have the same issues in the
       | same order.
       | 
       | Then I learned it's easier not to judge at all.
        
         | bryanrasmussen wrote:
         | Louis C.K had a routine about this
         | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cr1aAYOhFsQ
        
           | drfloyd51 wrote:
           | I can relate. Thank you.
        
         | rootusrootus wrote:
         | Yes, when you have a toddler undergoing a public meltdown, it
         | is easy to see who around you is an experienced parent, and who
         | is not. Just by the look on their faces.
         | 
         | > Then I learned it's easier not to judge at all.
         | 
         | A skill we should all cultivate, IMO. Life is happier when you
         | do not waste it constantly judging.
        
           | bcrosby95 wrote:
           | I smile a bit and give a chuckle when a toddler is giving a
           | parent a hard time. It reminds me of simpler times. The
           | problems and consequences are so much smaller than teenage
           | problems.
        
         | phatfish wrote:
         | Badly behaved kids I am more understanding of now (at least the
         | younger ones). But there are defintely easy ways out of
         | problems some parents take that are not good for children.
        
           | com2kid wrote:
           | Yeah, with a kid I still judge. I'd rather see kids running
           | around and playing and being kids in public than on a tablet.
           | Even grocery shopping I see toddlers on tablets sitting in
           | the cart.
           | 
           | My son has been actively involved with meal planning since he
           | as a a year and a half old. "What type of bread today? What
           | type of fruit in your yogurt tomorrow?"
           | 
           | I won't judge kid's behavior, so long as they are acting like
           | kids. Sometimes that means they act out, that is normal.
           | 
           | But, damnit, let them live in the real world and not just try
           | to distract them with shiny things all the time.
           | 
           | I remember going to restaurants in the 90s and early 2000s
           | and kids would be running around playing with each other
           | between tables. That is kids being kids, and it is perfectly
           | acceptable (heck desirable!)
        
             | mothballed wrote:
             | I've been detained by police under suspicion of
             | "kidnapping" for taking my kid to the park (my kid is a
             | different "race" as me so it was "suspicious"). On another
             | occasion my kid was interrogated because they were walking
             | home from school on our own property, and someone wondered
             | "why they were alone."
             | 
             | On the other hand, no one has ever called the police on me
             | for handing the kid a tablet and melting their brain
             | inside.
             | 
             | When I was a kid either of those people would be
             | practically thrown in a loony bin for saying anything, let
             | alone taken serious by the authorities. Now the CPS
             | investigates almost every accusation and is legally barred
             | from even telling you who made it, so these anonymous
             | shitstains can exercise their cowardice behind a curtain as
             | much as they like with no risk to themselves but every risk
             | to you.
             | 
             | It's difficult to let them live in the real world not
             | because some evil guy with a white van is waiting to offer
             | "free candy" but that the evil person in a white van is
             | actually the Karen who sees a kid on the street or the park
             | as an inconvenience for her or an unacceptable risk and
             | they can be the coward they are and make an anonymous
             | complaint and cause weeks of harassments by CPS with the
             | cell phone they have next to them at the ready wherever
             | they might see a child.
        
               | com2kid wrote:
               | > I've been detained by police under suspicion of
               | "kidnapping" for taking my kid to the park (my kid is a
               | different "race" as me so it was "suspicious"). On
               | another occasion my kid was interrogated because they
               | were walking home from school on our own property, and
               | someone wondered "why they were alone."
               | 
               | And this is why I pay an arm and a leg to live in
               | Seattle.
               | 
               | Kids here are running around outside playing soccer in
               | the streets with parents watching guard for cars at the
               | ends of the block.
               | 
               | Mixed race is not even noteworthy here.
               | 
               | Kids walk to/from school (up to a mile) all the time.
               | Huge groups of kids walk together every day.
        
               | mothballed wrote:
               | Yes the park thing happened to me while visiting a white
               | suburb of a very racially segregated city.
        
             | cknoxrun wrote:
             | The only thing I'll add is that you never know what people
             | are going through. Both of my children have pretty intense
             | ADHD, and when I went through my divorce I definitely
             | leaned into too much screen time for a while. It wasn't
             | permanent though, and I managed to get back closer to the
             | ideal you speak of (but as a single parent, it took a lot
             | of processing of guilt to find a balance that worked).
             | 
             | I've decided it's safer to just never judge, that parent
             | you see pushing the toddler around in the cart might indeed
             | be a terrible parent, or they might be going through grief
             | and at their breaking point.
        
               | com2kid wrote:
               | > I've decided it's safer to just never judge, that
               | parent you see pushing the toddler around in the cart
               | might indeed be a terrible parent, or they might be going
               | through grief and at their breaking point.
               | 
               | Agreed, I should have clarified that I'm speaking more
               | about friends and family, people's whose situation can be
               | spoken to directly.
               | 
               | I have friends with neurotypical kids who still hand the
               | kids tablets at restaurants instead of actually teaching
               | the kid how to take turns in a conversation, or how to
               | actually go through a menu and order!
               | 
               | Like I get it, it is tiring, but we all signed for the
               | work when we chose to have kids. (At least in my social
               | circle where kids are very well planned for in advance).
        
         | Balgair wrote:
         | Before kids, you take a look around a diner or a store or a
         | playground and you see little ones happily eating some chips or
         | browsing the foodstuffs or playing on a slide.
         | 
         | You think that this is what kids are like. They sit there, they
         | walk a little, they giggle on the playground, they look cute as
         | all get out, etc.
         | 
         | Then you have kids and you know.
         | 
         | You _know_.
         | 
         | Those kids sitting there in the booth sipping on their milk
         | quietly while mom and dad happily eat their lunch? Those are
         | the top 5% most calm kids out there. The other 95% of kids are
         | with their adults screaming and throwing fits and covered in
         | who knows what.
         | 
         | Life _lied_ to you. It did it directly to your face, unashamed.
         | The bias is _real_.
        
           | pimlottc wrote:
           | That's not the impression I hear from my many intentionally
           | childless friends. They take the negative behavior - the
           | screaming, tantrums, chaos - as the norm.
           | 
           | It sounds like you always wanted kids. I don't say this to
           | criticize - it's great that those who want to start families
           | do so - but I don't think your experience is universal.
        
             | Balgair wrote:
             | Oh then it's _even worse_! As again, only the more well
             | behaved kids are going out in public.
        
           | Gud wrote:
           | Uhm, who walks around believing kids are well behaved?
        
             | drfloyd51 wrote:
             | lol. Kids are animals. Parents have to teach them manners
             | and behaviors
        
         | brightball wrote:
         | I was the worlds best parent...before I had kids.
        
           | DonThomasitos wrote:
           | Thanks for making me laugh - great poetry :D and so true. I
           | can't stand people w/o kids complaining about their parents.
        
         | socalgal2 wrote:
         | I still judge parents, because I compare them to other parents.
         | 
         | Good parents = kids not 100% glued to phones/tablets, social
         | around friends and family, not throwing tantrums at 8-16 yrs
         | old.
         | 
         | Bad parents = kids always throwing tantrums, kids basically
         | always getting their way because they've learned parents will
         | always give in, parents and kids 100% ignoring each other.
         | 
         | One set of friends - I go to visit, I play with their kids - we
         | go out to dinner, we interact with both adults and kids
         | 
         | Another set of friends - I go to visit, they sent their kids to
         | their room - we go out to dinner, they give the kids tablets
         | and they're entirely ignored for the whole time.
        
           | Trasmatta wrote:
           | > Bad parents = kids always throwing tantrums
           | 
           | But sometimes there are legit behavioral issues that are
           | extremely challenging, and are not the parent's fault.
           | Sometimes what looks like a "tantrum" on the outside can
           | actually be autistic overwhelm and meltdown, which can happen
           | with even the best parents. Not to mention stuff like
           | Intermittent Explosive Disorder.
           | 
           | All this to say...if you see a kid in public throwing a
           | "tantrum", you still shouldn't judge the parents without
           | knowing the full picture.
        
             | com2kid wrote:
             | There is a difference between kids using bad behavior to
             | get attention or blackmail parents vs kids who have actual
             | behavioral problems they are working through.
             | 
             | The first is an actual problem stemming from bad parenting
             | and as a society we should indeed shame parents who raise
             | spoiled kids who expect everything to be given to them.
        
               | Trasmatta wrote:
               | The point is that if you just see a kid on the street
               | throwing a tantrum, you don't know which of those
               | situations you're actually looking at
        
               | com2kid wrote:
               | OP was referring to observations at friend's houses.
               | Presumably they'd be aware of any underlying issues.
               | 
               | Judging random people on the street isn't wise. Judge
               | your friends and loved ones instead! :D
        
               | Trasmatta wrote:
               | I mean, do you even know the full story at a friend's
               | house? I guess it depends on how closely you know them,
               | and whether they've confided any developmental issues
               | they're children are dealing with.
        
           | msteffen wrote:
           | I mean, not judging other parents doesn't come from thinking
           | that all other parents are doing a great job, it comes from
           | knowing that you're doing a terrible job in your own, special
           | ways.
           | 
           | Parenting children is impossible, therefore all parenting
           | lies on a spectrum from terrible to catastrophic, and it's
           | hard to know how you did until they grow up (if ever) because
           | there's a lot of sensitivity and subtle emotional stuff,
           | especially at very young ages, which are the most important
           | and the ones you remember the least. I'm certain there are
           | screen-free parents who are worse for their kids than a good
           | chunk of tablet-hander-outers
        
           | bcrosby95 wrote:
           | It's difficult to translate what you're saying. You say "go
           | to visit" which implies you don't see your friends with kids
           | very often. If true you're in a poor position to make these
           | judgements even by your own standards.
           | 
           | Everything you're observing is even more likely to occur if
           | you don't see them that often. Your friends probably want to
           | spend more time focusing on you. The kids are not that
           | familiar with you and are less likely to engage with you.
           | Which also makes the parents more likely to want to distract
           | them with something else.
           | 
           | Whether or not you're bringing children with you matters too.
           | It sounds like you don't because you're focusing on child-
           | adult interactions. If someone has kids the kids run around
           | and be kids with their loudness, and child-adult interactions
           | are going to be much more likely. If you're not bringing kids
           | in tow my kids are much more likely to just go off and do
           | their own thing.
           | 
           | Much of what you're pointing out can also be down to
           | individual child temperment. Which changes as children age.
           | By your standards many parents turn into a bad parent once
           | their kids become a teenager.
           | 
           | That is not to say that your observations are 100% wrong. But
           | just that there's so many variables, most of which I didn't
           | even mention here, makes trying to analyze your statement
           | make my head spin.
           | 
           | Not to lean too much on anecdotes, but I have a friend who
           | has extremely well behaved kids. He has said a couple times
           | that he feels like he has placed too many adult
           | responsibilities on his kids. Is he a good parent? Based upon
           | outside observation, he seems good. But he seems to be
           | questioning some of his own choices. Maybe that alone makes
           | him a good parent? I don't know, who am I to judge?
        
           | drfloyd51 wrote:
           | Trust me. Don't judge.
           | 
           | Even if you compare to other parents, you are judging the
           | reference-parents.
           | 
           | If you have data over time you can draw conclusions on things
           | you want to try as a parent.
        
             | pstuart wrote:
             | Agreed. It's not nature vs nurture, it's nature (with
             | nurture sanding off some rough edges).
        
             | chocolateteeth wrote:
             | What about judging judgers?
        
           | pipes wrote:
           | All kids are different, my second has about 20 tantrums a
           | day. I've no idea why. It's getting really hard to deal with.
           | But it will pass.
           | 
           | Honestly the only certainty is that unless you have been 100
           | percent responsible for a very young child for more a few
           | days, you have no idea what you are talking about. I don't
           | mean that directed at you. Just my own generalisation based
           | own experience and the opinion of every other parent I know.
           | 
           | Life as a parent is completely different than life before.
           | 
           | I saw a woman completely lose her shit in a museum with her
           | kid. Before I became a parent I would have judged. But when
           | it happened I just thought "poor woman, I know how it feels,
           | just giving it her all and she's got nothing left to give
           | right now, how many times have I felt like that, how many
           | times have I failed to live up to my own ideals as a parent".
        
             | InexSquirrel wrote:
             | Definitely hard to say. I get being angry and frustrated,
             | and circumstances surrounding being a parent might not help
             | at all. For instance my wife and I have no family to help
             | out. It's just us. It's hard, but we do what we can.
             | 
             | I'm beyond fortunate that she's fully into being a mother,
             | calm, patient but knows where the boundaries are. And
             | that's reflected into our kid. He's so incredibly easy to
             | parent, it's insane.
             | 
             | I look at his friends - all good kids. Boisterous,
             | outgoing, a bit wild and uncontrollable, but fundamentally
             | good kids. They fight with their siblings, and they're
             | learning how to navigate the world.
             | 
             | And then I go shopping. We live in lower socio-econimic
             | area, and it's genuinely just saddening to see what goes
             | on. The number of parents that are actively, in public,
             | swearing out their kids and just having the kids stand
             | there quietly shrinking away is heartbreaking.
             | 
             | I don't know what's going on in the parent's lives, and I
             | know being a parent is immensely difficut, and none of us
             | are equipped from the outset to really become one... but
             | yelling at your kid for being a f*ck in the middle of a
             | shopping center? I fail to see how any of that is OK
             | because of 'circumstances'. At some point you have to grow
             | up and be an adult. You put this kid here. You need to take
             | responsibility. It doesn't mean it's easy, but if you can't
             | self reflect enough to know that's not OK, then you're a
             | big part of the reason the kid is how they are.
        
               | pipes wrote:
               | Yeah... I was thinking about what I wrote above, I came
               | to the conclusion that actually there is a limit. Because
               | some people are awful parents, and that is reflected in
               | how damaged some people are. I guess I could see the
               | woman in the museum was trying, and had just had enough.
               | But hey she was in a museum with her kids trying to do
               | something positive with them.
        
           | surgical_fire wrote:
           | Sometimes it's entirely on the kids.
           | 
           | My parents always tried to make me socialize, tried to unglue
           | me from videogame/PC when I was a teenager, etc
           | 
           | Turns out I was always an introverted prick.
        
         | sublinear wrote:
         | I'm glad you at least determined the root cause.
         | 
         | Plenty of truly bad parents shrug responsibility off by making
         | the "technically correct" claim that all kids throw tantrums,
         | therefore they're not a bad parent. They then proceed to
         | provide an unstable environment to raise their kids and the
         | tantrums don't end until well into adulthood.
        
         | dismalaf wrote:
         | Dunno, I didn't judge before having a kid. After having a kid,
         | it's 100x easier than people made it out to be and it's hard
         | not to judge.
        
           | redwood wrote:
           | Maybe your kid is easier than most.. I would not generalize
        
         | doright wrote:
         | I will continue to judge my parents for abusing me throughout
         | childhood until doing so no longer contributes to my own
         | healing. There is no single right way to respond to a
         | hyperactive child but there are plenty of permanently life-
         | altering ones.
        
       | alexchantavy wrote:
       | My favorite part is how pg says how kids made him less ambitious,
       | but then:
       | 
       | "On the other hand, what kind of wimpy ambition do you have if it
       | won't survive having kids? Do you have so little to spare?"
        
         | camillomiller wrote:
         | It's called having kid while rich so you can hire nannies, tho
        
           | alphawhisky wrote:
           | This. Don't forget that HN is extremely biased towards High
           | income/net worth viewpoints. The reality for a lot of parents
           | is much worse than most commenters here
        
           | genthree wrote:
           | 100%. I had to drop about half my interests and hobbies after
           | having kids, to remain sane (trying to continue juggling all
           | of them was plainly just going to lead to never doing
           | anything, really), and adjust all the others to fit better
           | with kid-having.
           | 
           | If you can't hire "help", it's like losing 20 waking hours
           | from your week, at least, just for the not-at-all fun or
           | "quality time" parts of having a kid (extra housekeeping
           | [so... very much more], extra shopping, taxiing the kids
           | places, extra household planning, basic hygiene stuff, et c).
           | And on top of that you need to spend "fun" time with them,
           | too, like that part may be more enjoyable but it's non-
           | optional and a lot of stuff an adult might want to do or
           | accomplish doesn't integrate well with it.
           | 
           | Slice ~30-40 hours off the waking hours of _both_ adults in
           | the household, on top of 45-50 hours of work and other stuff
           | necessary for work (commute, et c.) and... yeah this is just
           | bullshit if you can 't hire help.
           | 
           | [EDIT] Oh, this reminds me of a certain genre of LinkedIn
           | post that I especially hate: the CEO bragging about how they
           | find time for family despite having five jobs. The real
           | answer to this mystery is that zero of those jobs are
           | actually full-time work, _and_ , the part they never mention,
           | is that they pay others to do tens of hours of work per week
           | that normal people have to do themselves, like lawn care,
           | housekeeping, fixing broken shit in their house, shopping,
           | keeping track of and making appointments and such, et c.
        
       | jasonkester wrote:
       | Before having kids, I expected it to be this huge life changing
       | thing. That it would effectively end the part of my life where I
       | was free to do whatever I wanted, and start the part where I was
       | just Daddy, doing nothing except serving my childrens' needs.
       | 
       | But that didn't happen. We just carried on being Jason and his
       | partner, but with a baby in tow.
       | 
       | I had spent most of my 30s cramming in as much "living" as
       | possible, to make sure I'd stocked away a lifetime supply of it.
       | After all, I'd probably never get another chance to travel for
       | long periods, keep up with climbing, and all that other stuff
       | that Independent Jason could do.
       | 
       | But it was all for naught. We just packed the kid along and went
       | traveling anyway. He had eleven stamps in his passport by his
       | first birthday.
       | 
       | Life is just as much fun as ever. But now we have some kids to
       | play with.
        
         | tayo42 wrote:
         | Travel with a baby isn't that bad.
         | 
         | I think people struggle with losing their identity when they no
         | longer get long periods of focus time or can participate in
         | their hobbies with the dedication they would like.
        
           | loloquwowndueo wrote:
           | Depends on the baby. Some are nightmarish.
           | 
           | That's the main thing - each family and each child are
           | different, so it's kind of hard to base your decision on what
           | you see and hear from others.
        
             | tayo42 wrote:
             | Sure, the default for travel shouldn't be it'll be a
             | nightmare though or impossible.
        
             | svachalek wrote:
             | Yeah mine was colicky and every time getting him to sleep
             | involved rocking him for an hour+ while he screamed in my
             | ear. And he woke up so easily. So I spent about 2 hours a
             | day rocking and patting for the first year or so, not
             | checking off a dozen countries on my passport.
             | 
             | Never had a second for some reason.
        
               | pfannkuchen wrote:
               | I'm curious what made you conclude that he was colicky as
               | opposed to something else?
               | 
               | I was labeled colicky as a baby and my own children
               | turned out to have some digestive issues with certain
               | common foods that make them cry a ton when they or their
               | mother eat them (and they get it via the milk). If I
               | hadn't debugged the food issues I might have labeled them
               | "colicky", but when we avoid those foods religiously they
               | only cry when it makes sense and when the issue is solved
               | they stop. I'm guessing I had a similar issue as a baby,
               | my parents definitely didn't attempt to debug it.
               | 
               | No judgement by the way I'm just curious if you tried
               | debugging things like that as I imagine "colicky" could
               | encompass issues that aren't possible to debug also, and
               | it's also understandable if you couldn't put in the
               | resources to debug it as in my case it's been a gigantic
               | and expensive pain in the ass.
        
               | mothballed wrote:
               | Well when you go to every specialist and try every type
               | of milk and every diet change imaginable it gets there
               | through a diagnosis of exclusion.
               | 
               | Trust me, the debugging is a big part of the trouble.
               | Everyone is telling you to debug, but that is actually
               | the thing you have to learn to stop doing. Your brain is
               | telling you to debug. But it can't be debugged. I watched
               | multiple women have mental breakdowns trying to debug a
               | baby with a 6 month streak of colic. Eventually their
               | brain just goes psychotic because a baby screaming 6+
               | months non-stop with nothing wrong while people
               | frantically try to solve the problem is basically sever
               | mental torture. It is not the hours, or days, or even
               | weeks of screaming that get to you, it is the months of
               | never ending ear-pearcing torture that nothing will fix,
               | and they will not fucking sleep because they just want to
               | scream for all of their sleep as well and naturally the
               | caregivers won't be sleeping either due to this. And you
               | cannot rely on crying to figure out when to feed, when to
               | change a diaper, when the baby needs sleep, or some
               | gentle motion -- all of your indicators are worthless.
               | 
               | It is a hell for the baby and it is a hell for the
               | parent. People struggling with this generally do not have
               | any more children. Any other stage past baby for such
               | child is 99% easier, I laugh when people say babies are
               | the easiest stage.
        
               | bregma wrote:
               | Our first was colicky for the first 18 months or so. A
               | nightmare, really, just like you described. Back arched,
               | face red, for hours every day, no comforting.
               | 
               | We went on to have more kids. They were all quiet and
               | easy. We sometimes wondered if there was something wrong
               | with them.
        
           | genthree wrote:
           | IME babies are the very easiest for almost everything.
           | 
           | It's way more work to travel with a 10-year-old than a
           | 1-year-old. Then quadruple that difficulty for each
           | additional kid of roughly that age...
        
           | InexSquirrel wrote:
           | It can be. And it also places strain on the people around you
           | too if the kid isn't settled and easy to travel with.
           | 
           | Not the kids fault, but last time I travelled, there was a
           | couple travelling with a child that was crying, hysterically
           | the entire trip. This was a 20 hour trip all up, from NZ to
           | SA, crossing NZ to AU then to SA, and they were with us all
           | the way. The kid was going for the entire thing - I watched
           | the parents take turns to look after her, standing near the
           | toilets. I feel sorry for them having to deal with that, and
           | for the girl being that upset (presumably sore ears? dunno),
           | but that would not have been fun for the people around them
           | either.
           | 
           | I was always super wary of travelling with ours in case that
           | happened. We were lucky that they just slept through all the
           | flights, but it could have easily gone the other way. I would
           | have felt pretty stink subjecting the surrounding 40+ people
           | to a very upset child.
        
         | vermon wrote:
         | I'm 6 months in and it has definitely ended my life as it was
         | and nothing is the same. I'm pretty lucky that my wife gives me
         | almost 16 hours of free time daily, from which 8 I work and 8
         | is for sleep. If I want to work out or do something else I need
         | to steal it from the sleep time. It's pretty early though so I
         | might be looking back in a few years and think that it was not
         | that bad actually :)
        
           | gkdr wrote:
           | A lot of gyms will watch your kids while you work out. Great
           | opportunity to give both of you a break.
        
             | drivebyhooting wrote:
             | Very questionable quality child care.
        
         | ChrisMarshallNY wrote:
         | _> He had eleven stamps in his passport by his first birthday._
         | 
         | I was raised overseas (Dad[0] in the CIA).
         | 
         | Both good and bad. First, if it's just "traveling," and not
         | "living" overseas, I suspect that it's not so bad, but military
         | brats have common quirks, for a reason. Our lives get torn up
         | and replanted regularly. It's hard to make friends, and we
         | often end up having a difficult time, retaining long-term
         | relationships, later in life.
         | 
         | But, man, the life story that it gives you. There's few cures
         | for xenophobia, better than immersion.
         | 
         | [0] https://cmarshall.com/miscellaneous/MikeMarshall.htm
        
         | nDRDY wrote:
         | You have just the one kid, right?
         | 
         | We were the same ;-)
        
           | jasonkester wrote:
           | Two now. That's still manageable.
        
             | EvanAnderson wrote:
             | Good on you. We were 'one and done'. Two sounds more than
             | 100% more difficult, if only just because the number of
             | edges in the relationship graph going up.
             | 
             | My parents managed four kids, albeit for most of that time
             | there were only 3 living in the home at a time (13 years
             | between the oldest and youngest).
             | 
             | A friend of mine had eleven (!!!) siblings. That horrifies
             | me. Cliques could form in that size population! Utter
             | craziness.
        
         | roarcher wrote:
         | > We just packed the kid along and went traveling anyway. He
         | had eleven stamps in his passport by his first birthday.
         | 
         | How do you keep a baby happy and quiet on long international
         | flights? I currently have no kids but I may find myself in this
         | situation in the next couple years. I'm dreading being the guy
         | with a screaming infant on a 13-hour trans-Pacific flight that
         | keeps everyone from sleeping.
        
           | dzink wrote:
           | First two years they can fly for free, but they have to ride
           | in an adult's lap and that gets tiring. Don't believe the
           | bassinet offerings - as soon as a plane gets turbulence, you
           | have to get the sleeping baby out of the wall bassinet and
           | good luck appeasing them. Age 1-2 is hardest for travel, so
           | you can skip it. The only thing that worked was getting their
           | own seat with the cosco scenera next car seat (or their own
           | if they like it, but that one is $50 and light to carry).
           | They would sleep nicely for large chunks and you get to enjoy
           | travel again. After age 3 it's much easier (they can ipad if
           | that's the only ipad time they ever get).
        
             | HoldOnAMinute wrote:
             | Don't go straight to screens in this situation. You can
             | introduce novelty by purchasing a number of cheap toys,
             | even from the dollar store, which they have never seen
             | before. Keep them hidden until the flight.
        
           | hamdingers wrote:
           | Babies want nothing more than to sit on your lap snoozing and
           | feeding. It's more or less what you do at home anyway. The
           | hardest part about flying with a baby is dealing with the
           | added luggage (stroller, carseat, overpacked diaper bag,
           | etc).
           | 
           | It's only once they're old enough to have more sophisticated
           | feelings (like boredom) but not old enough to communicate
           | them (except by screaming) you get in trouble.
        
         | EvanAnderson wrote:
         | > Before having kids, I expected it to be this huge life
         | changing thing. That it would effectively end the part of my
         | life where I was free to do whatever I wanted, and start the
         | part where I was just Daddy, doing nothing except serving my
         | childrens' needs.
         | 
         | Had a very similar feeling. When my wife told me the "getting
         | pregnant" worked I mourned a little bit. I recognize we were
         | exceedingly lucky to have had such a wonderful kid, and it has
         | worked out very well.
         | 
         | For the first 6 mos. a lot did change, but after that things
         | seemed to skew back to a new "normal".
         | 
         | It will be 13 years in May since we had our daughter. I'm so
         | glad we did it.
         | 
         | I know that it could have gone a lot differently, though. I'd
         | never suggest that it'll be great for everybody.
        
         | jbrun wrote:
         | Absolutely. Also, kids end up helping you focus on the travel,
         | experiences and things that are truly worthwhile. You drop a
         | lot of activities and TV and other activities that was frankly
         | a waste of time anyways.
        
         | com2kid wrote:
         | > Before having kids, I expected it to be this huge life
         | changing thing. That it would effectively end the part of my
         | life where I was free to do whatever I wanted, and start the
         | part where I was just Daddy, doing nothing except serving my
         | childrens' needs.
         | 
         | There are some huge changes.
         | 
         | The largest is a lack of the mental downtime where deep thought
         | and problem solving could occur.
         | 
         | I can't get off work, hop on my car, and drive around for an
         | hour mulling over technical work. I can't stay an hour past
         | with coworkers and noodle solutions on a white board. I can't
         | get up at 2 am to try something out that just popped into my
         | head.
         | 
         | I need to be in bed by 10pm every day. I have to get up at 7am
         | every day. On weekdays 2 meals a day need to be planned, on
         | weekends 3 meals a day. I can't try experimenting with some
         | random new recipe that may fail, my kid needs to eat lunch on
         | time not 2 hours late.
         | 
         | Yes it is a lot of fun (theme parks! Trick or treating!), but
         | I'm thankful I did a ton of amazing engineering work before I
         | had a kid because there is no way I can dedicate the absurd
         | amount of time to innovating/solving hard problems, that I used
         | to.
        
         | madduci wrote:
         | It happened to me and now, after more than 8 years, I find
         | myself still in the situation where I am serving my children's
         | needs and not having time to satisfy my personal ones.
         | 
         | They go to bed when I am also tired. Trying to having an hobby
         | past their bed time means sacrifying sleep time.
         | 
         | Travelling is also a challenge, since they lack interesting in
         | seeing something new, but just want to have fun playing,
         | especially playgrounds.
        
         | sershe wrote:
         | That doesn't appear to be a common story. I now have to
         | schedule phone calls with my retired mother because between my
         | sister and her partner who both work, and her, with 2 kids -
         | one small but active that needs constant minding and one that
         | needs chaperoning to activities - she often doesn't have one
         | uninterrupted hour in the evening for an entire week.
         | 
         | Nearly everyone I know with kids is more similar to this story
         | than yours.. to each their own but it's certainly not for me:)
        
         | markus_zhang wrote:
         | I think it depends on the baby and the parents' personality,
         | but kudos to you.
        
       | globular-toast wrote:
       | Taking drugs is great too. But I know not everyone will do it.
       | You won't get to experience everything so just be glad about the
       | things you do get to.
       | 
       | I'm so glad I've avoided kids.
        
       | throwaway132448 wrote:
       | > And while having kids may be warping my present judgement, it
       | hasn't overwritten my memory. I remember perfectly well what life
       | was like before.
       | 
       | It's funny that he actually believes this.
        
       | grahamburger wrote:
       | The great thing about kids is that just when you start to miss
       | their toddler temper tantrums, they start having teenage temper
       | tantrums!
        
       | corry wrote:
       | This is one of my favourites from PG, not least because it's a
       | bit antithetical to what I perceive as a growing trend among
       | smart, ambitious people (for whom children might represent
       | friction, inconvenience, etc)... as well as folks for whom COL is
       | making the question irrelevant due to practical concerns.
       | 
       | Actually, it's really striking that even in America -- the
       | developed country with the #1 highest birthrate -- still falls
       | below the replacement rate. What is it that's inversely
       | correlated between growing wealth and having children? Especially
       | since it was likely to opposite for most of human history? (i.e.
       | large families were a sign of wealth and power).
       | 
       | PS - I can't resist offering my own experience as a parent - what
       | a treasure to have discovered that I'm capable of such love, and
       | to get to watch this love transform me into a better person than
       | who I was before. This kind of love demands everything of you,
       | but through it you discover a truer and stronger version of
       | yourself too.
        
         | r14c wrote:
         | Due to the extremely competitive nature of the US economy, a
         | lot of people have to choose between career success (having
         | money) and starting a family (which is expensive). I know a lot
         | of women who want to have a family, but have struggled to get
         | to a comfortable economic position where they can actually do
         | it. Compounded by the wage stagnation, which makes it hard for
         | most people to support a family on a single income. We have
         | hollowed out our third spaces, so its difficult for people to
         | relax and socialize. Even vibing ends up being a kind of
         | competition because of the high costs. Not to mention the
         | perverse incentives in the housing market.
         | 
         | None of this is conducive to starting a family.
        
           | genthree wrote:
           | I think the two-income household (two full-time paying jobs,
           | specifically) is a lot of it, and seems to go along with
           | "rich" countries.
           | 
           | Having all the stuff that _could_ happen during the day if it
           | were (if you will) someone 's full-time job, instead get
           | crammed into evenings and weekends when you're trying to also
           | do non-chore stuff with your kids (or, for god's sake, maybe
           | get just one measly hour to do something you want to do,
           | alone... or spend time with your spouse, without kids...) and
           | take care of things that _have to_ happen each evening
           | (dinner, bed time stuff) really, really sucks.
           | 
           |  _Not_ having chores piling up through the week to ambush you
           | both on the weekend would be amazing. I can hardly even
           | imagine how much more free we 'd feel. With two working
           | parents it's like neither ever gets any actual time off that
           | they're not carving out by neglecting _something_ they really
           | ought to be doing (usually several somethings)
        
         | qsera wrote:
         | When someone asks me if starting a family is worth it, I borrow
         | words from Agent K and tell them, "Yes, if you are strong
         | enough"...
         | 
         | But as you say, I suppose everyone ends up becoming strong.
         | Because there is no other way...
        
           | pixl97 wrote:
           | Oh, if you read some of the headlines in the news... no, not
           | everyone.
        
         | foxglacier wrote:
         | Kids cost time, not money. So the wealthier you are, the more
         | difficult it is because you probably have less free time. You
         | can pay someone else to raise your kids (daycare/etc.) but then
         | you lose a lot of the value of having kids.
         | 
         | This bullshit excuse that somebody can't afford to have kids is
         | proven wrong by the fact that poorer people have more kids than
         | rich people. You can even be unemployed. Gone are the days of
         | destitute single mothers having to give up their child to the
         | church and work in the poorhouse. We have social welfare for
         | that.
         | 
         | Maybe the fact that poor people can have lots of kids has taken
         | away their value as a status symbol for wealth?
        
           | hamdingers wrote:
           | > Kids cost time, not money.
           | 
           | There's a well known aphorism about this...
        
           | pixl97 wrote:
           | Um, wtf is this rambling statement that doesn't seem to be
           | based in any kind of truth at all?
           | 
           | In the past both poor and rich tended to have tons of kids,
           | this is because kids tended to die young regardless of being
           | rich or poor.
           | 
           | Then you're trying to compare massive social changes in the
           | west that occurred around the same time. For example womens
           | suffrage, women being allowed to work, sexual revolutions and
           | birth control.
           | 
           | If you look at countries that tended to develop later, the
           | rate of childbirth tends to drop with accessibility to birth
           | control and education.
        
         | jmye wrote:
         | > Actually, it's really striking that even in America -- the
         | developed country with the #1 highest birthrate -- still falls
         | below the replacement rate. What is it that's inversely
         | correlated between growing wealth and having children?
         | 
         | I think a lot of people miss the simple fact that some people
         | _just don 't want kids_ and are unable to reconcile their
         | personal experience with anyone else's.
         | 
         | My partner and I are both wealthy enough that we could both
         | afford children and we can afford to not have children. But
         | neither of us think our lives would be improved by having them.
         | 
         | I think that's really, really hard to understand for a lot of
         | parents and people who want to be parents: being (relatively)
         | wealthy creates choice, and that a growing number of people are
         | _choosing different things_ now that they have the ability to
         | do so.
        
           | TheOtherHobbes wrote:
           | I think a lot of people are also pessimistic about the
           | future.
           | 
           | It's fairly obvious the world will be very different and
           | _much_ less pleasant place by 2050. A lot of people don 't
           | want their kids to live through that.
           | 
           | It's possible aliens will arrive before then and fix all our
           | problems, or some other Salvatio Ex Machina, but it's not
           | exactly a high-odds bet.
        
         | sumtimes89 wrote:
         | More wealth and education gives people the option to choose
         | which I think is a good thing. People who don't want kids
         | shouldn't be forced to have them. Before, people had kids
         | because they needed them to work on their farm or it's what was
         | expected of them as a housewife. Now that we have a choice,
         | less people want to commit to taking care of a human for 18+
         | years. It's great so many people want to be parents but having
         | a kid doesn't automatically make someone a great parent.
        
       | chzblck wrote:
       | Love seinfield's quote about kids -
       | 
       | "One of the nice things God does, is that he doesn't let people
       | who don't have kids know what they're missing"
        
         | BigTTYGothGF wrote:
         | One of the nice things about not having teenage daughters is
         | you don't have to worry about Jerry Seinfeld hanging around.
        
       | jen729w wrote:
       | Kids aren't for everyone. Please don't guilt-trip people for not
       | having them. (I know this article isn't doing that.)
       | 
       | https://wearechildfree.com/
       | 
       | Disclosure: Zoe is my cousin.
        
         | eloisant wrote:
         | Of course people are free not to have kids... But I've always
         | find it weird to "celebrates childfree lives".
         | 
         | And I'm frankly annoyed by the growing activism to ban kids
         | from public places in the name of "adults quietness".
        
           | whateveracct wrote:
           | many adults nowadays are less resilient than my baby
        
           | markus_zhang wrote:
           | As a parent I'm kinda cool with that. Adults, especially
           | middle-age family adults, are not really supported in this
           | world and they should enjoy whatever the peace they can get.
           | If my kid gets too grumpy I'd bring him out for a walk and he
           | is usually happier after that.
           | 
           | Ofc no escape on trains/buses, but he loves those, so that's
           | fine.
        
         | gametorch wrote:
         | > Tired of doing this alone?
         | 
         | That's some pretty ironic copy xD
        
       | mkapoor26 wrote:
       | How come this article by PG is trending today?
        
         | fusslo wrote:
         | there was a twitter exchange (I don't have a link) where
         | someone said the YC mindset is to not have kids and PG replied
         | with this essay
        
       | jorisboris wrote:
       | I see a lot of different opinions here, from very positive to
       | very negative.
       | 
       | I think the answer is, it's both.
       | 
       | When I was an employee sometimes I was happy, like when a
       | promotion was lurking, and sometimes I was unhappy and stressed,
       | when getting fired, when facing deadlines, ....
       | 
       | But when I started working for myself the amplitude of emotions
       | became way stronger, every week I would fluctuate between feeling
       | doomed forever or feeling like a genius.
       | 
       | Life with and without kids is the same: The emotional highs of
       | having kids are way higher than anything I experienced without
       | kids, but sometimes the lows are very low.
        
         | eloisant wrote:
         | People can also have very different experiences because kids
         | can be very different.
         | 
         | My kids have been really easy, no big problems, but sometimes I
         | see other parents dealing with really serious issues with their
         | kids.
         | 
         | It starts with babies, some of them sleep easily while other
         | cry all the time, to teenagers who can be nice kids with no
         | problem at school to being called to the director's office all
         | the time and have to seriously worry about their future.
        
       | markus_zhang wrote:
       | I have a ~6 years old boy and I'm quite neutral about that --
       | that is, if I somehow go back to a few years ago, I may or may
       | not go forth for a kid -- which was my attitude back then anyway.
       | 
       | There are some upside, but they are...tangible. The downside is
       | concrete and solid. From hindsight, having a kid has nothing to
       | do with my long-term objectives, but since I can't dial back in
       | time, I'll try to be at least a median good father -- I have
       | gotten the financials covered, and I'm pretty sure in that part
       | I'm better than the median, but for the focus part I'm not sure.
        
       | bayarearefugee wrote:
       | As a 52 year old I specifically avoided having kids.
       | 
       | For decades I have been convinced that we are speed-running into
       | a global environmental crisis that we will continue to ignore
       | until it is far too late and this will result in associated
       | resources wars and I never wanted to doom other people into
       | having to live through that.
       | 
       | I sincerely hope for the sake of those of you who made a
       | different choice that I turn out to have been overly doomerist,
       | but watching the Trump 2.0 years play out I now think that I
       | wasn't doomerist enough.
        
       | hotfrost wrote:
       | I would really like to have kids, but I don't have my act
       | together. I also feel like my partner is not suitable or capable
       | of properly taking care of our kids. Feels pretty awful and am
       | scared to not have any kids as I grow older. I worked hard to get
       | a good relationship with my partner, and now that we have one I
       | worry kids will only ruin what we have now
        
         | dominotw wrote:
         | just go for it. there is never a really good time to have a
         | kid.
        
         | chzblck wrote:
         | You'll never feel ready but you will always be ready. One of my
         | biggest regrets is not having kids sooner
        
         | Daneel_ wrote:
         | I hope you're in a position where you can have an honest
         | conversation about it with your partner. I've come to realise
         | over time that honest and open communication is the most
         | critical thing in any relationship. I really hope it works out
         | for you both!
        
         | whateveracct wrote:
         | your world will change in that hospital room the first day or
         | two together with the new person in your family. it really is
         | seismic.
        
           | mothballed wrote:
           | I never felt that and I attribute whatever happens to most
           | people there as the reason why I never understood parenthood
           | quite the way most people do. It seems as if most parents
           | have some kind of 'drug' that dumps in their veins when they
           | are around their kids. It's interesting to read about because
           | it's like hearing an alien tell me what life is like.
        
       | sp4cec0wb0y wrote:
       | This is an easy perspective to have if you are of the generation
       | that got into a home purchase before they went out of control.
       | Gen Z is being priced out of creating families.
       | 
       | Hacker news has a bias because most people here are working in
       | software and _probably_ make more than the median household
       | income (solo).
        
       | JeremyHerrman wrote:
       | I'm in the thick of it right now as a serial founder with a 5 and
       | a 1 year old. One thing I'm surprised paulg didn't touch on is
       | how much it can evolve your relationship with your partner (for
       | the better!).
       | 
       | Watching my wife have special moments with our kids fills my
       | heart like nothing else.
       | 
       | Seeing her be an amazing mom is like watching your cofounder take
       | on a completely new role outside of their previous experience and
       | crush it. Except it's even better since you're in love with them
       | and have all these biological/chemical signals to help kick that
       | in high gear.
        
       | btilly wrote:
       | There is a politically correct thing to say about having kids. It
       | is wonderful, I love them, it made me want to be a better person.
       | That's all true.
       | 
       | I'm not going to be politically correct. I'm going to be honest.
       | For some of us, it is a hard reality check.
       | 
       | As children, many of us had various kinds of hard experiences.
       | You can get a rough idea of how hard your background likely was
       | by tallying up the different kinds of Adverse Childhood
       | Experiences that you had. The result is your ACE score, and it is
       | a standard risk assessment tool. You can find the list near the
       | end of
       | https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/24875-adverse....
       | 
       | My ACE score is 9/10. Most of you won't have had that level of
       | challenge, but a lot of you had problems. I've done a lot to deal
       | with my background, work on my mental health, and so on. I swore
       | to break the cycle, to give my children a better start than I
       | had.
       | 
       | I mostly succeeded. Only mostly. The impact of my failures became
       | obvious when COVID turned many homes into hothouses for mental
       | illness. My kids were not unique in their struggles. But within
       | their peer group, it was my kids that were hit first and hardest.
       | And then I did not cope well with the result. As a result I,
       | also, have been having mental health problems.
       | 
       | For people like me, I recommend a long and hard think before
       | having children. If you do have children, you will naturally try
       | to do your best. I certainly did. You are extremely unlikely to
       | succeed as well as you'd like. I certainly didn't. And so you
       | should also prepare to give yourself grace for the ways in which
       | you might fail. If I had done better on that, then I would have
       | been better able to carry on and try to pick up the pieces when
       | the shit hit the fan.
       | 
       | To everyone who is beginning on this journey, I wish you luck.
       | Cherish what you have. Do your best.
       | 
       | And if your best did not turn out to be as good as you wanted,
       | you have my sympathy.
        
       | OnAironaut wrote:
       | There is nothing more narcissistic and selfish than having kids.
       | There is nothing noble about fulfilling your biological
       | imperative to leave a descendant. Quite the opposite, really,
       | it's a rather primitive egoistical desire to somehow continue
       | oneself after death.
        
         | chzblck wrote:
         | Probably good you are taking yourself out of the gene pool
        
           | OnAironaut wrote:
           | If idiocracy is good then yes.
        
             | gametorch wrote:
             | Talking to a psychotherapist or reading fiction might help
             | you feel more at ease. It's a crazy, contradictory world. I
             | wish you well.
        
         | whateveracct wrote:
         | haha okay you definitely couldn't hack it
        
       | throwaway77385 wrote:
       | I wish there was a way to make this decision rationally. My wife
       | and I are coming up to the point of no return. We either do it
       | now, or never.
       | 
       | Now let's try to figure this out: Do we have enough money? Yes,
       | probably. We could survive 10 years without making another dime.
       | I don't know what kind of safety net is recommended, but people
       | do it with a lot less. We live in a country with free health
       | care, so illness won't end our lives like it does in the USA.
       | 
       | With that out of the way, let's get to all the other points:
       | 
       | How much do I want children? Personally, I don't get it. If my
       | wife wasn't dead-certain she _must_ have at least one child, I
       | would never, ever consider it. I hate noise and chaos. I even
       | find co-habitation challenging.
       | 
       | I was an only child and I think I'm mildly autistic. To me,
       | 'alone time' and 'quiet time' are sacred and required for my
       | sanity. Well, I know that goes out the window with children. My
       | wife is the opposite: Many siblings, has always been around noise
       | and chaos. Loves giving love. To me, the dog, to anyone. And that
       | is why she seems to have this need. So, the decision is: Do I
       | give up what I want, to make her happy?
       | 
       | Her happiness is about as important to me as my own. So that's a
       | stalemate. She keeps saying how worried she is that it will ruin
       | my life. But I also don't want us to split up over this, knowing
       | that I have 'taken' her fertile years. She won't have a kid
       | except with me. So that's also a stalemate. I have had a pretty
       | terrible childhood. So I know I'm biased. I don't want to let
       | fear dictate my life.
       | 
       | Almost any occasion where I've stepped outside my comfort zone or
       | done things I didn't want to do out of fear turned out to be
       | things I was grateful to have done.
       | 
       | I can also see how raising children could be very rewarding. Even
       | my therapist said it can be very healing to have children. It's
       | an opportunity to do better than my parents. That's valuable, for
       | sure.
       | 
       | And then I think of the state of the world. Awful. I wouldn't
       | want to bring children into this. I'd even probably say to my own
       | mother 'don't bother' if she'd come to consult me about whether
       | to have me first. But then I spoke to my granddad, who was a
       | teenager during the 2nd world war. He is also probably mildly
       | autistic. He said it was the best thing he ever did. Had multiple
       | kids.
       | 
       | If I look at my wife's family, they are all happy, successful,
       | harmonious people (now). I look at my wife's parents and think
       | "what a blessing". The richness of life they get to experience is
       | just magical. If I could somehow guarantee that it'd go that way
       | for me as well, then I'd have kids already.
       | 
       | But there are no guarantees, just uncertainty. Uncertainty of the
       | "life changes forever, irrevocably" kind. That is brutal and
       | scary.
       | 
       | The last time I made a similar decision was when starting a
       | business. I knew I went down a road that would require stability
       | and dedication. I'm a volatile person who quickly gets bored of
       | things and wants to move on to other things.
       | 
       | Thanks to my wife I've done a bunch of things I never thought I'd
       | do, because they require dedication and consistency. Something I
       | don't really have. Renovating houses, starting businesses. I
       | surprised myself with what I was capable of. All thanks to my
       | wife.
       | 
       | I also think it's basically a crime to not let her raise a human
       | being. I am certain anyone raised by her would be a net positive
       | to society.
       | 
       | But then there's me and my issues. I don't know how I'll deal
       | with it. I don't know what will happen. There's a chance I can't
       | do it. And what then? Divorce? Repeat the cycle of putting
       | children into the world and abandoning them, like my parents did,
       | because they also couldn't handle it?
       | 
       | They were very young and had no money or support. Their
       | relationship was also broken. My wife and I are 'old' and we have
       | money and we have been an unbeatable team for well over a decade.
       | We also have support. Grand-parents are basically next door and
       | dying to help with raising a kid. So we are in a privileged
       | position.
       | 
       | But my fear of taking this step is not going away. And I won't
       | know what it'll be like. Parents look so tired. Many of my
       | friends are parents. They all seem to offer the same advice "it's
       | hell on earth, I hate every moment of it, it's the best thing
       | I've ever done".
       | 
       | Awesome. What am I supposed to do with that? It's useless advice.
       | It seems nobody can really tell you whether to do it or not.
       | 
       | Any people here who were equally fearful and then did it, NOT
       | regretting it? And I mean truly. I don't want to hear the "I love
       | my kids"-mantra. It's an automated thing everyone has to say. I
       | mean truly.
        
         | Balgair wrote:
         | Having kids is like eating a mango.
         | 
         | You can talk to the foremost mango growers on cultivating mango
         | trees and learn everything there is to know about making
         | mangoes. You can consult with the best chefs about how to make
         | the best mango dishes and desserts and learn the absolute best
         | way to prepare and eat mangoes. You can learn from the masters
         | of how to paint a mango so lifelike that you'd think the
         | painting was real. Etc. You can learn and truly master
         | everything surrounding the act of eating a mango.
         | 
         | But until you sink your teeth into a mango and actually eat it,
         | you've _no_ idea what you 're talking about.
         | 
         | So, until you actually have the kid, all this worrying is for
         | naught.
         | 
         | You will be just fine, the kid will be just fine (they have
         | their own agency too, you know), the world will keep turning
         | and you have the agency to put a person in it and teach them
         | what they need to know.
         | 
         | The real question is if you want to eat a mango or not.
        
           | throwaway77385 wrote:
           | Thank you for the perspective. This is a good way of framing
           | the dilemma.
        
         | whateveracct wrote:
         | the easiest way to bypass all that existential anxiety is to
         | have it happen on accident :)
        
           | throwaway77385 wrote:
           | Haha, agreed. Like I alluded to in my post, many of the best
           | things in my life have come from just being thrown into the
           | deep end. If standing at the edge of a pool and ruminating
           | over whether to jump or not, one may never do it. If the
           | choice is made for you, well, then there's no ruminating. But
           | we're too old for accidents now, this is going to happen with
           | intention, or not at all. Which is also fine, but I am
           | interested in hearing other people's experiences.
        
       | GlibMonkeyDeath wrote:
       | Caveat emptor. I am a grandparent now, so I think I have some
       | perspective on this.
       | 
       | Of course we love our kids, and we had (and still have) a lot of
       | good times with them. But kids can really break your life and
       | marriage, too - amongst my peers I can't tell you how many have a
       | struggling young adult kid or two (with relatively serious mental
       | or physical health problems), with no resolution in sight.
       | 
       | So stay lucky - having a child is a wild act of optimism. And if
       | you want kids, don't wait too long. There is never really a good
       | time to have a kid (just different trade-offs), so for the best
       | chances for health, be as young a parent as possible. And men
       | have a biological clock, too: e.g.:
       | https://neurosciencenews.com/genetics-sperm-mutation-neurode...
        
         | brightball wrote:
         | The serious mental and physical health problems are real and a
         | societal concern. Everyone "notices" the trends, but maybe it's
         | not you so you just think there's nothing you can do about it
         | and do your best to stay healthy.
         | 
         | Then you have a child and you are suddenly hyper-aware of
         | _everything_ going into the body and brain. Everything they
         | eat, every doctor visit, every time they get sick and what
         | could have exposed them, every word spoken on TV, every friend
         | they have and how they act or how that friend passes along
         | their parents influences, etc.
         | 
         | And suddenly you're very concerned about societal level macro
         | influences on food, medical, etc because those influences are
         | going to affect your child's life.
        
           | bcrosby95 wrote:
           | There's definitely a balance here. Not giving a shit, which
           | seems to have been the tradition I was raised in, is not
           | great. Recognizing problems is good. Acting on all of them is
           | bad. You need to raise grounded kids who can grow into
           | resilience so by the time they're adults they're able to
           | navigate this strange world.
           | 
           | Especially trying to control who their friends are and what
           | they hear. Questionable behavior from friends at younger ages
           | can actually be a good thing: it lets you plant the seed
           | early when your kids still listen to you.
        
       | aogaili wrote:
       | he is coping so hard
        
       | bethekidyouwant wrote:
       | "most of the freedom I had before kids, I never used. I paid for
       | it in loneliness, but I never used it."
       | 
       | I will add to this that the first five years are tough, but it is
       | great after that
        
       | knorker wrote:
       | It's a well written post, but this:
       | 
       | > The fact is, most of the freedom I had before kids, I never
       | used.
       | 
       | That just seems like close to the definition of freedom. I have
       | the freedom to go outside right now and eat dirt. I've never used
       | it.
       | 
       | If you didn't do something then I guess you didn't want to, more
       | than the things you did choose to do instead.
       | 
       | The only way you'd have enough life to do "most" of the things
       | you'd be free to do, is if you're not free to do but a tiny
       | thing.
       | 
       | > See what I did there?
       | 
       | Yup. Made no sense at all, is what. A UAE passport makes you free
       | to visit 181 countries either visa free or visa-on-arrival. It's
       | still freedom even if you don't take the time to visit all 181
       | countries.
       | 
       | It's not even an interesting paradox. It's just an obvious part
       | of freedom.
       | 
       | Most people don't visit more than 35 countries. An Afghanistan
       | passport gives you access to 35 countries.
        
       | i_am_a_peasant wrote:
       | I once had neighbors above me whose kids yelled all the time. all
       | the time. and sometimes they were sick of the yelling and they
       | put their girls outside of the apartment door. and she was just
       | punching hard the door over and over and yelling "MAMAAAA!".
       | 
       | Sure I feel sorry for the kids being distressed for one reason or
       | another. but these guys did literally nothing.
       | 
       | There just has to exist someone on the planet for which the title
       | "shit parents" does objectively apply no matter how you look at
       | it.
        
       | Trasmatta wrote:
       | I'm 36, and unlikely to ever have kids. I'm both very grateful
       | for the freedom that's afforded me in life, and occasionally feel
       | grief for parts of the human experience I'll never feel.
        
         | mekdoonggi wrote:
         | I have a kid and it's the greatest joy ever but I am very
         | lucky. It's totally okay to grieve that, but I often tell other
         | childfree folks: there are many things you can do to feel a
         | similar kind of joy. Mentoring, volunteering, caring for
         | friends etc. Having the joy of working for others and
         | emotionally investing doesn't have to be exclusive.
        
       | mnmnmn wrote:
       | Parents were uncool, but surely Paul Graham has always been
       | uncool too?
        
       | vincentabolarin wrote:
       | Before having kids, you think everything will change forever.
       | 
       | After having kids, you realise that things only appear different
       | for a while, and you simply flow into the new reality.
       | 
       | Everything really changed forever, but not as drastically as you
       | might have thought.
       | 
       | Remember how everything changed when you got or lost a job? Yeah.
       | Well, maybe not exactly, but you get the point.
        
       | Triphibian wrote:
       | My big learning from having a kid, was that there was more
       | maturing and growing up for me to do (A ton to be honest). Once
       | there was somebody else I had to keep alive and care for and
       | think about I learned to better de-center myself in the universe.
       | I am sure you can get to this perspective many other ways, but
       | having children seems to be the easy mode for getting into the
       | mindset of "it's not about me any more."
        
       | Xcelerate wrote:
       | I've always wanted kids, ever since I was a kid myself, but I was
       | never really sure what it would be _like_ to be a parent.
       | 
       | Turns out it's quite strange, because my kids bring me more joy
       | than anything else. I'll sit there for hours watching them play.
       | You may think "that's not strange--tons of parents say that", but
       | for my sort of personality, it's very strange. I've always
       | thought of myself as sort of overly analytical, detached,
       | ambitious, and a bit obsessive. Not the sort of touchy-feely
       | person who chases a two year old around with a smile on my face
       | and likes watching videos of cute babies. Yet here I am. I enjoy
       | it so much I've even tried to figure out if there's a way I can
       | take a sabbatical from work to spend the last two years with my
       | youngest at home before he goes off to school (seems unlikely
       | given how questions about a random two year gap on my resume
       | might affect my long-term career).
       | 
       | It's funny that as a kid I always wanted to work at a tech
       | company for the interesting tech, but now as an adult my favorite
       | thing about it has been the 4 months of parental leave I was able
       | to have with each newborn.
        
         | olau wrote:
         | You just write "spent two years raising my youngest kid
         | [building tree houses and whatnot]". If you keep a bit up with
         | tech, why would anyone think twice about that? They wouldn't
         | where I live.
        
       | tsoukase wrote:
       | Having kids is a 4 billion year old life function (instinct).
       | Simultaneously it is a highly sofisticated behaviour with
       | multiple dimensions (raising).
       | 
       | Genetics play a decisive role in kid's behaviour and
       | powers/weaknesses. Next comes the mother, next the father and
       | later the society.
       | 
       | Let's not forget that parents are "kids" of the society that
       | heavily influence their behaviour that eventually shapes their
       | kids.
        
       | smath wrote:
       | My 2c is that it is not 'joy' or 'happiness' that kids bring to
       | parents universally (although they might bring those things for
       | some parents), but 'meaning'. Meaning is harder to define than
       | joy/happiness, perhaps because it is less objective and more
       | subjective.
        
       | oxag3n wrote:
       | Reading the post and >100 comments I've just realized there are
       | differences between dad and mom mental experience.
       | 
       | Looks like many dads are changing mentally when their first child
       | is born or a bit later. Mine changed somewhere during the second
       | trimester.
       | 
       | Bonding is also almost automatic for mothers (especially who
       | breastfeed), whilst it's delayed or never happens at the same
       | level for fathers. My first child has never been close to father
       | because he worked "9-9-6" and got 2 day leave. He could never
       | really calm down crying baby or put her to bed. With the second
       | child, thanks to large corp policy, he got 15 weeks bonding leave
       | and it was a very different experience for father and child -
       | baby didn't care on whose lap to fall asleep.
        
       | neonnoodle wrote:
       | I often wonder in these threads what proportion of the commenters
       | is male. HN skews heavily male, and statistically speaking,
       | fathers are spared a huge chunk of the physical and mental
       | burdens of pregnancy, birth, and parenting. Being a mom and being
       | a dad are not equivalent, and I have a feeling that not many male
       | HNers would readily swap places if such thing were possible.
        
         | sublinear wrote:
         | I don't mean to inject politics, but there's a huge mental
         | burden on fathers with more conservative values that take their
         | role seriously.
         | 
         | Unfortunately, there's no way to elaborate what I mean on HN or
         | much of the web without stirring up a ton of pointless
         | argument. People will just get defensive and refuse to consider
         | perspectives they can't agree with.
        
           | neonnoodle wrote:
           | Yeah, I agree, if you're talking about the role of the
           | patriarch as a stoic provider who isn't allowed to be a
           | vulnerable man with his own emotional needs.
           | 
           | It has been encouraging to see how much more men now seem to
           | desire being engaged and nurturing in their children's lives
           | (even among those who otherwise consider themselves
           | conservative or traditionalist).
        
           | tavavex wrote:
           | That huge mental burden is entirely self-inflicted, though.
           | It's not a fair comparison to the physical burden that is
           | unavoidable.
           | 
           | Growing up in a more conservative society, I've seen many
           | people with that parenting style, who often pop a proverbial
           | blood vessel trying to ensure that their children are more
           | like army cadets that perfectly reflect their worldviews and
           | don't take an unapproved step in any direction. Their
           | rationalizations ranged from real safety concerns to
           | arbitrary opinions like what religion is right (and exactly
           | how someone needs to act at all times, with no limits on
           | specificity or ridiculousness) or what large groups of people
           | are evil (nationality, religion, identity - any group is fair
           | game, just pick one and wall off your child from ever knowing
           | about them). Regardless of motivation, ideology is a choice,
           | and they could've relieved a whole lot of this burden on
           | their own at any point.
        
           | caaqil wrote:
           | Instead of the ceremonial complaint and preemptive whining,
           | why don't you consider making the argument coherently and see
           | how people respond?
           | 
           | Ironically, the pointless arguments you so despise (and
           | refuse to invite) offer more than whatever utility this
           | comment has.
        
         | ergocoder wrote:
         | Assuming the income stays the same, I'd happily swap places. I
         | suspect many people would.
         | 
         | There are 2 further points:
         | 
         | 1. I'd say the ideal setting is for both parents to work and
         | hire a sitter even though it might financially net the same (or
         | affordably negative) as having one stay-at-home parent. Because
         | a human needs community and diverse things to do, not just one
         | thing over and over everyday for years. Both of the parents
         | will be much happier.
         | 
         | 2. When people say taking care of baby/toddler is difficult,
         | it's almost always about not eating well and/or not sleep well.
         | Eating would take an hour of spoon-feeding because the kid
         | wouldn't eat by themselves. Kids wouldn't be able to sleep by
         | themselves. You must focus on solving these 2 areas first. Once
         | they are solved, it gets a lot easier to take care of a
         | baby/toddler.
        
           | briHass wrote:
           | While stay at home parenting isn't, and shouldn't have to be,
           | for everyone, it also isn't somehow a downgrade from being in
           | the working world. If anything is doing something 'over and
           | over', it's trudging to some job to push papers/keyboard keys
           | around for 8+ hours.
        
         | liveoneggs wrote:
         | Isn't it convenient that nature has already placed us in our
         | respective roles and given us the necessary strengths to handle
         | our different but equally important roles?
         | 
         | It's such a tragedy that one might feel compelled to weigh the
         | burdens of motherhood vs fatherhood as if either side had a
         | choice in the matter or as if there is some kind of competition
         | to be won.
        
           | AndrewDucker wrote:
           | The only roles that nature put you into are carrying the baby
           | and giving birth (and possibly breastfeeding). Everything
           | else can be done by both parents.
           | 
           | (I'm a dad, who _does_ do half of everything with the kids.
           | It is possible, it 's just a lot of stuff to do.)
        
             | liveoneggs wrote:
             | I doubt OP would agree with your assessment nor your use of
             | the word "only" but I appreciate you. ;)
        
       | tavavex wrote:
       | > On the other hand, what kind of wimpy ambition do you have if
       | it won't survive having kids? Do you have so little to spare?
       | 
       | I don't know, it seems like parenthood asks for a lot to be given
       | up. Younger people like myself are already struggling to live on
       | their own where I am. There's not a lot that can be spared by
       | most of us.
       | 
       | To me, having a child means heavily straining your financial
       | safety - here, care for this other person that can't do anything
       | and has some of the most expensive needs in society. Not only
       | that, but you need to be sure that you can provide for the child
       | for the next 5, 10, 15 years. Who has that sort of confidence?
       | Then there's the part where all your free time is sacrificed to
       | care for the child. The time burden decreases, but it's always a
       | lot of time. And you always have to be extremely risk-averse - if
       | you were just responsible for yourself before, now you have
       | someone you need to take into account for every thing you do in
       | life. Moves, job changes, major risks or investments, career
       | changes, taking on additional responsibilities. All of these
       | things probably become much less doable for parents. And this is
       | a one-way road with no backing out, you commit to it and are
       | stuck with that choice for several decades. By the time your
       | child lives on their own, you've already spent a large portion of
       | your adult life. And there's no guarantees that your child is
       | someone you like, or that your parenthood isn't soured by
       | something else. There's plenty of parents who are stuck in
       | parenthood and hate it.
       | 
       | The thought of having a child scares me. I'm happy that the
       | author is content with how his life turned out, but I'm okay with
       | just watching from the sidelines. Maybe the biological instinct
       | (forced coping mechanism?) is so strong as to justify living
       | through the horrors above in exchange for watching your kids play
       | and participating in similar things. But I don't want to learn
       | what that's like.
        
         | wltr wrote:
         | It's like nobody knows who the author is, and that he's rich.
         | It's different from when you're not rich. (Not even saying
         | poor.)
        
           | tavavex wrote:
           | I didn't realize who he was until I looked up the name. I'm
           | just too young to have heard it from real life, and also I'm
           | not great at names. I assumed he was someone known in the
           | industry, but not literally the founder of Y Combinator.
        
         | coneonthefloor wrote:
         | You exist solely to procreate.
         | 
         | I could not imagine an emptier life, than one without children.
        
           | strangegecko wrote:
           | I reject your premise, but your conclusion is not surprising
           | considering it.
           | 
           | I couldn't imagine an emptier life than one where the only
           | thing that matters is procreation. We're not Pacific Salmon.
        
             | coneonthefloor wrote:
             | I'm sorry for your loss.
        
           | metalliqaz wrote:
           | I think this is an unconsidered opinion.
           | 
           | For example, I wonder how many monks or priests would agree
           | with you.
        
             | coneonthefloor wrote:
             | Men that make sacrifices to serve.
        
           | tavavex wrote:
           | You don't exist for something. You simply exist. What you
           | choose to do with that existence is up to you. I've yet to
           | see any evidence to the contrary.
        
         | vladgur wrote:
         | The best thing our(I'm in US) society can do to dispel fears
         | like yours is to offer public daycare where kids are well cared
         | for and socialized.
         | 
         | I'm a child of Soviet Era and our parents did not think twice
         | if they can afford children with their meager salaries. I
         | remember going to a kindergarten as soon as I could walk.
         | 
         | The reality is that a family can always make choices that
         | enable them to care for a kid, but there are of course trade
         | offs.
         | 
         | Public daycare would mitigate one of those trade offs
        
       | cat-turner wrote:
       | As a female founder I want children, but I know that I'll be seen
       | as less ambitious if I have them. I will be seen as less, and
       | will be more overlooked for opportunities than I already am now.
       | I will have them one day, but they'll be in secret. People won't
       | know until the business reaches a certain revenue and level of
       | success. It is like this for women and anyone who tells you
       | otherwise is a liar.
        
       | diehunde wrote:
       | Such a corny take. People should have kids when they know for
       | sure they want to become parents. If they are unsure because the
       | life they want for themselves seems incompatible, then it becomes
       | a gamble. So many miserable parents out there who hide their
       | experiences because they are afraid of social punishment or
       | because they need to convince themselves that this permanent
       | life-altering decision was the right one. That's my take as
       | someone who for 35 years didn't want kids and one day woke up
       | knowing for sure I wanted a kid in my family.
        
         | redwood wrote:
         | Do you honestly think those miserable parents stay miserable
         | for the long term or might that be a temporary bump in the
         | ride?
        
       | pstuart wrote:
       | One of the most challenging aspects of being a parent (at least
       | for me) is dealing with the kids not interested in cooperating or
       | listening/learning. Their mother and I spent a great deal on
       | music lessons and it was a challenge to get them to practice, and
       | I was unable to coerce them to practice so they could reap the
       | rewards of being able to create music themselves.
       | 
       | And just in general, giving guidance and seeing that look on
       | their faces that means they're just waiting for you to stop
       | talking so they can go on with their lives.
        
         | stuxnet79 wrote:
         | > One of the most challenging aspects of being a parent (at
         | least for me) is dealing with the kids not interested in
         | cooperating or listening/learning.
         | 
         | > And just in general, giving guidance and seeing that look on
         | their faces that means they're just waiting for you to stop
         | talking so they can go on with their lives.
         | 
         | Instead of seeing this as a challenge perhaps reflect on it and
         | take it as an opportunity to learn more about your kids. Not
         | everybody is the same, and not everyone will have the same
         | aspirations.
         | 
         | I know of many who got the full ride in terms of music lessons
         | but do not have any intrinsic passion for it. Overall it was a
         | total waste of time in terms of their life satisfaction and
         | fulfillment. Me on the other hand, I was very into music but
         | didn't have the option of getting any lessons.
         | 
         | FWIW I was one of those kids who was very compliant and
         | cooperative but in retrospect I can see that it harmed my
         | development / self-concept. It's only now as an adult that I'm
         | able to grapple with this.
        
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