[HN Gopher] When someone says they hate your product
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       When someone says they hate your product
        
       Author : jger15
       Score  : 50 points
       Date   : 2025-12-29 19:30 UTC (3 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (www.getflack.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (www.getflack.com)
        
       | kayo_20211030 wrote:
       | It's very hard to accept criticism; very hard. But OP's view is
       | the mature, thoughtful way to go about it. Some people are going
       | to be mad-as-hell, and they just will be. The analysis and advice
       | is good. The initial response from the founder wasn't great and
       | because we all like rooting for the underdog, there was a pile-
       | on. Bad on us.
       | 
       | But, just to see how accepting criticism works, it wasn't
       | Dostoevsky who had that quote about happy families, it was
       | Tolstoy. :-)
        
       | chuckadams wrote:
       | Shorter: "Don't take it personally". Also, people tend to dial
       | down their flamethrowers once they see that you're listening.
        
       | alansaber wrote:
       | OP is wrong, ad hominem is the best way to both defend your
       | intellectual integrity and also drive engagement
        
         | ahoka wrote:
         | What a stupid opinion.
        
           | corndoge wrote:
           | It is sarcasm
           | 
           | edit: wait i get it now
        
             | andrewflnr wrote:
             | Pretty sure the one you're replying to is as well. :)
        
         | nostrapollo wrote:
         | In fact, acknowledgement of any kind is failure - report the
         | truth as anything counter to the feedback, and tell everyone
         | how much support your counter argument has by quoting numbers
         | no one can verify (important)
        
           | zephen wrote:
           | 73.24% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
        
             | tclancy wrote:
             | They say sixty-five percent of all statistics / Are made up
             | right there on the spot / Eighty-two-point-four percent of
             | people believe 'em / Whether they're accurate statistics or
             | not
             | 
             | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUK6zjtUj00
        
               | doodlebugging wrote:
               | RIP Todd Snider. He was real.
        
           | cloche wrote:
           | Taken from the Donald Trump School of Leadership I'm sure :)
        
       | amortka wrote:
       | The underrated trick here is separating "signal" from "status
       | game." Even hostile reviews often contain one actionable
       | invariant ("this workflow is brittle", "pricing feels
       | dishonest"), and the rest is just the reviewer performing for an
       | audience. If you respond only to the invariant (and maybe ask one
       | concrete follow-up), you de-escalate without rewarding the
       | theatrics -- and you also create a public artifact future users
       | can trust.
        
         | andrewflnr wrote:
         | Yeah. Even with good faith feedback, separating the signal
         | from... whatever else is going on in the feedback-giver's mind
         | can be a bit emotionally fraught. But you've gotta do it.
        
       | dlcarrier wrote:
       | We have more users than everyone you just mentioned (combined).
       | 
       | That's my favorite part. When an organization dominates a market,
       | it's possible that they're so much better than the competition
       | that the market has full-force chosen them, but that's almost
       | never the case. Usually, it's because they've managed to avoid an
       | open market all-together, (e.g. through exploiting intelectual
       | property protection, byzantine compliance requirements, exclusive
       | contracts made without concern for end users, etc...) and there's
       | no need to make the product good, making it far worse than all of
       | the competition (combined).
        
       | jaggederest wrote:
       | In my experience, haters are some of the most passionate users,
       | if you can do even the smallest thing to demonstrate a desire to
       | improve, they'll often be huge advocates over the medium term.
       | 
       | I was working at a startup and we got some frustrating and
       | hostile feedback from a user, I responded by acknowledging the
       | issue and sending them a beta build that attempted to fix their
       | issue. (it did not, but...)
       | 
       | Just reaching out and trying to engage made an enormous
       | difference. They ended up contributing significantly to isolating
       | and fixing that specific bug and others in the future, and
       | referring us a few customers to boot, if I remember correctly.
        
         | latexr wrote:
         | Agreed, I've experienced that myself. But I've also experienced
         | the opposite: the user who always complains, doesn't think
         | things through, refuses to consider how their ideas would
         | impact other users, doesn't follow instructions...
         | 
         | In some cases, had I had the power to do so, there are a few
         | users who I'd gladly have "fired": offer a full refund in
         | exchange for no more support.
        
         | kayo_20211030 wrote:
         | Haters can be like bombs. You want to defuse them. Don't shake
         | 'em. Don't drop 'em. Just render them safe. It's possible
         | there's some gold in the ore; there might be, and if there is,
         | accept it gratefully; but it's often hard to tell the
         | constructive true-believer from the vindictive maniac. Your #1
         | job is to make it all inert, and to be able to walk away
         | without an explosion destroying the business, social-media
         | explosion or otherwise.
        
         | awesome_dude wrote:
         | Don't fix what's making you bundles of cash :-D
        
         | joewhale wrote:
         | You'll also great some of the greatest feedback from them too.
        
         | xboxnolifes wrote:
         | People hate because they care. There's some exceptions (like
         | bandwagon hating), but the people who hate on something the
         | most tend to be people who _want_ to like the product.
        
       | 6r17 wrote:
       | Frustration is the fuel for innovation.
        
         | btmiller wrote:
         | Interesting thought! In moments like these, capturing the
         | innovation can be ignited by asking whether the comment was
         | frustration or feedback, or said slightly differently "was that
         | trying to be helpful or hurtful?". Tends to get the other party
         | to rethink their words and produce a more productive dialogue.
         | It's a tool we can all use both at and outside of work :)
        
           | 6r17 wrote:
           | I often use it as a self-reflection for myself ; i'm working
           | solo so my exploration is really different - (thankfully I
           | work on tools I use myself). Anger / Frustration can
           | definitely be measured from text only - I don't necessarily
           | need to "drive" a discussion to try to get an explicit
           | confirmation of what is going wrong - that signal is a strong
           | enough information to indicate for something important (or
           | that the user is just mad). Being able to switch from mad ->
           | chill is definitely the point where we can digest why
           | something is happening - and depending on the context it can
           | definitely underline important focus points to improve.
        
       | ericyd wrote:
       | Meh, CEOs response was bad, but I hate people with a burning
       | passion when they express feelings like that about a product.
       | Just stop using it and walk away and stop making it harder for
       | other people to live. If you want to offer feedback then lead
       | with that.
        
         | avhon1 wrote:
         | > Just stop using it
         | 
         | Unfortunately, not always an option without making major
         | lifestyle decisions (for example, software required by a job)
        
         | ForHackernews wrote:
         | Can't stop, they force us to use it
         | https://ifuckinghatejira.com/
        
         | eptcyka wrote:
         | We tried it CodeRabbit. They enable beta features without
         | asking, so one day your GitHub issues get AI responses without
         | anyone ever asking it to respond to it. I think the criticism
         | was warranted. I think it is OK to let people be passionate
         | about the tools they have to use. Ultimately, we decided to
         | disable CodeRabbit. But there were definitely some people on
         | our team that felt like they were forced into using it.
        
         | noplacelikehome wrote:
         | Not every consumer of a service like CodeRabbit will be in a
         | position to make decisions about the tools their org adopts, or
         | even be involved in the relationship with the vendor. Are they
         | not entitled to express exasperation in a public forum?
         | 
         | The guy offered some pretty valuable feedback to help improve
         | the product. Business idiots with ego problems can bury their
         | head in the sand at their own peril.
        
         | joshmanders wrote:
         | > but I hate people with a burning passion when they express
         | feelings like that about a product.
         | 
         | Interesting choice of words.
        
       | frizlab wrote:
       | "Claude gets it"
       | 
       | No. It does not. It does not understand anything. Stop
       | anthropomorphizing bots!
        
         | dboreham wrote:
         | How do you know whether a human brain understands something?
        
           | Groxx wrote:
           | thank you for providing evidence that some do not.
        
           | shimman wrote:
           | Probably the same way that I can be assured your
           | interpretation of red is mine.
        
             | kshahkshah wrote:
             | Some people are colorblind. Some people have more or less
             | cones and rods. Our interpretation of colors is certainly
             | not the same
        
               | mrbungie wrote:
               | You should steel-man the argument. GP is talking about
               | qualia, obviously for the sake of the argument you assume
               | the comparison is between two people with similar eyes.
        
               | hyperhello wrote:
               | Steel-man is such a weird expression. There are no steel
               | men. How about saying "The opponent's best argument".
        
               | nawgz wrote:
               | The wild success of traffic lights disagrees with your
               | statement.
        
               | nickthegreek wrote:
               | The wild success of traffic lights comes from having 3
               | colors at fixed positions. You put those 3 colors in a
               | single color changing light and I would assume the
               | accident rate would measurably increase.
        
               | evilduck wrote:
               | The fact that a single emitter traffic light that simply
               | varies its color doesn't exist also disagrees with your
               | statement.
        
               | inetknght wrote:
               | The wild success of traffic lights is only wildly
               | successful to those who aren't color blind. Do some
               | reading.
               | 
               | Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Color_blindness
               | 
               | > _The colors of traffic lights can be difficult for red-
               | green color-blind people. This difficulty includes
               | distinguishing red /amber lights from sodium street
               | lamps, distinguishing green lights (closer to cyan) from
               | white lights, and distinguishing red from amber lights,
               | especially when there are no positional clues (see
               | image)._
               | 
               | Publication from 1983:
               | https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC1875309/
               | 
               | > _All but one admitted to difficulties with traffic
               | signals, one admitted to a previously undeclared accident
               | due to his colour blindness, and all but one offered
               | suggestions for improving signal recognition. Nearly all
               | reported confusion with street and signal lights, and
               | confusion between the red and amber signals was common._
        
             | einarfd wrote:
             | Colors and color names are culture dependent, and you are
             | not guaranteed that people in different cultures agree on
             | what color something is.
             | 
             | The most famous of these discrepancies is Japan and green
             | vs blue, or why does Jenkins by default use red, yellow and
             | blue instead of red, yellow and green.
             | 
             | So I would urge using something other than colors as an
             | example of shared human experience.
        
         | onion2k wrote:
         | _Stop anthropomorphizing bots!_
         | 
         | They hate that.
        
         | willparks wrote:
         | "Claude has been trained to handle this the right way"
        
       | mock-possum wrote:
       | I find the things I hate the most are the things that I want to
       | like. What I hate specifically is the disappointment of seeing
       | 'bad' when I expect 'better'
        
       | hyperhello wrote:
       | I work in a big company where everyone knows how to "accept
       | criticism". What they don't know is how to fix the problems. The
       | company here had a tweetfest, then a blogfest, then an apology
       | fest. Did they even consider sitting down with a glass and
       | looking at the product?
        
       | JoaoCostaIFG wrote:
       | The fake apology at the end makes this quite funny. "I was just
       | protecting the team". "I learned many lessons". Etc. Good at
       | marking this as a company to avoid.
        
       | mattm wrote:
       | Even the CEO's "apology" is pretty bad. He still finds a way to
       | take shots at the original poster saying his original message was
       | inflammatory (could also be read as how I'm justified in my
       | response), that "he started it" and that the team was "spoken
       | down to or treated dismissively" which they weren't. All the
       | original feedback was about the project and was not directed at
       | specific individuals.
        
         | dogleash wrote:
         | Even without the jabs he kept taking, it's such an empty
         | customer service apology I don't think the CEO even understands
         | why people were annoyed.
         | 
         | > As a leader, I do not tolerate situations where our team is
         | spoken down to or treated dismissively.
         | 
         | You don't have any authority and haven't earned any respect.
         | You're just embarrassing yourself.
         | 
         | This reminds me of that meme of a dad trying to use the dad
         | voice to discipline some random kids over webcam. It's the
         | internet pops, not your neighbor's kids misbehaving at the
         | grocery store.
        
       | ortusdux wrote:
       | Harjot's initial feedback reminds me of one of my pet peeves:
       | 
       | If I reach out and say "I love that your product does X & Y, but
       | it would be helpful if it also did Z", please don't reply with
       | "Nobody needs Z."
       | 
       | Tell me you will look into it, or it's out of scope, or hard to
       | implement, or literally anything other than calling me a nobody.
        
       | smithkl42 wrote:
       | Complaints are amazing! I've said for years that you know you're
       | succeeding when people start complaining. Complaints are a sign
       | that users see something potentially valuable, and are frustrated
       | that they can't get there. Even if you can't prioritize the fixes
       | that would be required, you should still embrace them.
        
       | silisili wrote:
       | I often read reviews of places and things I'm even tangentially
       | interested in. As a user, there's little more unprofessional to
       | me than a company replying to negative reviews with anything but
       | an apology, or offer to help or do better.
       | 
       | So many places, especially local ones, take every sub five star
       | review as an insult and invitation to argue. I'm actually shocked
       | by the percentage of places that do this. It drives away my
       | business, and I can't be the only one.
       | 
       | Even not replying at all is a better strategy, IMO.
        
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       (page generated 2025-12-29 23:00 UTC)