[HN Gopher] All it takes is for one to work out
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       All it takes is for one to work out
        
       Author : herbertl
       Score  : 201 points
       Date   : 2025-11-29 20:22 UTC (2 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (alearningaday.blog)
 (TXT) w3m dump (alearningaday.blog)
        
       | mhog_hn wrote:
       | On the one hand it is a wholesome article. On the other hand - so
       | much wasted potential of people squeezing out the last bits when
       | competing. Nash equilibria can suck
        
       | hugodan wrote:
       | That's an aggressive problematic gambler mentality.
        
         | xandrius wrote:
         | When the outcome is positive, I see nothing wrong. Especially
         | if you lose basically nothing in trying.
        
           | mewpmewp2 wrote:
           | Your time, energy, etc are not nothing. If you think like
           | that, you have already lost and are not making optimal
           | decisions.
        
         | ashu1461 wrote:
         | Is it ? In gambling your odds are fixed, but in real life,
         | wouldn't you get better at solving problems with each iteration
         | ?
        
           | mewpmewp2 wrote:
           | Depends - are you meaningfully trying to improve or do you
           | keep doing the same thing over and over not getting it?
        
         | losvedir wrote:
         | No it's not. Gambler's fallacy is "I just flipped tails so
         | heads is more likely now". I read this article as "heads has a
         | 50% chance of coming up so I'll get one eventually" (which is
         | true - law of large numbers).
        
           | mewpmewp2 wrote:
           | I think none of those blanket statements here work.
           | 
           | Really it's just odds of finding success vs effort / time
           | spent. And whether that's worth it.
           | 
           | Any of the blanket statements could be true depending on what
           | the exact odds are.
           | 
           | There could be near 0% chance of finding success and it would
           | be better idea to rethink and spend time elsewhere, or yes,
           | there's 10% chance of finding success and it's significant
           | enough that trying 20 times is enough.
           | 
           | If we are talking about e.g. finding a house, if you are not
           | finding any it could very well be that your expectations vs
           | budget is unlikely to find anything and you have to
           | reconsider strategy.
           | 
           | Someone could be repeatedly trying to find work, and thinking
           | it's just a matter of time, but really time would be better
           | spent on improving their strategy, resume, or other means.
           | 
           | These statements to me seem like motivational non-sense which
           | misrepresent how real world works or what the patterns really
           | are like. At best they just give someone a false
           | understanding of how the world works, at worst they make
           | someone spend all their time in the wrong direction.
        
         | Animats wrote:
         | Indeed. "Just one more roll of the dice and I'll be ahead."
         | 
         | Worse, this guy isn't trying to get a job. He's just trying to
         | get into grad school. Which is no longer a guarantee of a good
         | career, but may be a guarantee of a big debt. Remember that "I
         | did everything right" post on HN a few weeks ago? CS degree
         | from a good school, but nobody wants junior CS people any more.
        
       | maest wrote:
       | Related: You should expect to keep getting "no"s until you get a
       | yes. That means, getting a "no" is actually normal, it's not
       | failing.
        
       | prophesi wrote:
       | Reminds me of Veritasium's recent video[0] on power law
       | distributions.
       | 
       | [0] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBluLfX2F_k
        
       | legerdemain wrote:
       | You've been trying for a long time.
       | 
       | What do you do if the job that makes you an offer doesn't excite
       | you? What if the house that feels like home needs more repairs
       | than you can afford? What if the program that accepts you has
       | crappy funding? What if the person who chooses you has red flags?
       | 
       | Do you say "screw it," cross your fingers, and walk through the
       | door that kind of sucks? Or do you keep looking as long as your
       | resources last you?
        
         | bgoated01 wrote:
         | Right. All it takes is for one to work out, if you have several
         | suitable options. If some of the options are only vaguely
         | suitable, or it comes to light through the process that some of
         | them are not suitable at all, then it takes more than just one
         | working out. That's what I was thinking while reading this.
        
         | GMoromisato wrote:
         | Every situation is different, and none of us can reliably
         | predict the future. Sometimes dealing with a bad job until you
         | get a better one is the right move. Sometimes it's the wrong
         | move.
         | 
         | Specifics, about the job and yourself, matter. If you feel like
         | sharing, this is a pretty good community with good instincts.
         | 
         | The magic in "all it takes is for one to work out" is in the
         | strength it gives you to keep trying. Trying something that
         | might fail is hard, even when we know that trying is the right
         | thing to do.
        
           | legerdemain wrote:
           | My point is that, at least anecdotally, certainty is rare.
           | Most of the time, for most people, the experience is less
           | "yes!" and more "I guess."
           | 
           | More widely applicable advice would be how to deal with
           | compromise, not how to hold out for "the right one."
        
         | kristianp wrote:
         | Often the "one" you need isn't the ideal, it's just what gets
         | you into the market. I'm thinking a job that gets you some
         | experience and much needed pay or a property that lets you
         | build equity while prices continue to climb.
        
         | riazrizvi wrote:
         | Maybe consider that we are all calibrated to standards that are
         | this hodgepodge of other people's messaging of what standards
         | should be, and they communicate them for a variety of reasons,
         | very few of which are truly designed for your reality, your
         | situation.
         | 
         | So when you say, 'kinda sucks', perhaps ask if the opinion is
         | grounded in (your) reality?
         | 
         | Once recalibrated to accept that what we are in, is inescapable
         | true life, then we stop looking for something better, and
         | instead focus on the challenge of making it better than it
         | should naturally be.
         | 
         | Happiness I believe, is a decision, we choose it when we feel
         | it's a sustainable perspective. I think it's sustainable to
         | allow ourselves to be happy, whenever we achieve marginal
         | improvement on what is natural.
        
       | jaychia wrote:
       | Great article and a timely reminder for many :)
       | 
       | Applicable not just for grad school applications, but also to job
       | apps, startups, and relationships.
       | 
       | Hang in there y'all, all it takes is for one to work out. Keep
       | working hard, kings & queens.
        
       | flatline wrote:
       | We job hop, have multiple hustles. Many people on this board have
       | started multiple companies, sometimes at once, on an ongoing
       | basis. Do you only want just one friend? People tend to have
       | multiple romantic/sexual entanglements, sometimes at once, but
       | generally more than one over a lifetime.
       | 
       | I think this can be a useful maxim to get you to the next day,
       | but in reality it takes a lot more than one of anything for a
       | fulfilling life. We grow and change and need novelty. We are held
       | in a web of interdependent, ever-shifting relationships - with
       | people, businesses, material goods, ecology. I think that
       | generally people are seeking connection in a broader sphere. To
       | be held in community, to have multiple significant identities
       | (mother/wife/boss), to live in richness and abundance where any
       | one thing is not make or break.
        
         | ChrisMarshallNY wrote:
         | _> in reality it takes a lot more than one of anything for a
         | fulfilling life_
         | 
         | We seem to view "reality" through different lenses. I've
         | usually found "one" to be a magic number; as long as it's the
         | "right one." That's the gist of what he's saying.
         | 
         | In my experience, needing more than one, often signals issues
         | that need closer examination.
         | 
         | In my community, we have a joke: _" An addict is someone that
         | needs two One-A-Days."_
        
           | HPsquared wrote:
           | I find the same, individual jobs or relationships seem to
           | give supralinear returns.
           | 
           | There's a lot of initial investment and groundworks, then
           | once you're well-integrated, the marginal returns get higher
           | for the most established relationships.
        
           | TeMPOraL wrote:
           | Getting from zero straight to _the one_ is like winning the
           | lottery. Most people need to get through multiple  "ones" to
           | find "the one".
        
             | ChrisMarshallNY wrote:
             | Agreed. It's not what I'd call a "fulfilling" process,
             | though.
        
         | afro88 wrote:
         | Do you really think that is what the author meant? They're not
         | saying "you only need 1". They're talking about going from 0 to
         | 1. It's sometimes a long and arduous 0. Your framing doesn't
         | help someone trying to get from 0 to 1. Once they're at 1
         | though, sure. But getting there can feel helpless, and that's
         | what this post is about.
        
         | j45 wrote:
         | We can try to walk in 10-20 directions at the same time and
         | move a tiny direction all, or none.
         | 
         | Or we can realize we have some things to learn that we will
         | learn no matter whether we pick the startup, or job to learn
         | transferrable skills and also become better well rounded.
        
       | siliconc0w wrote:
       | It's also interesting to consider that we are such adaptative
       | creatures that we will likely settle to a similar level of
       | happiness no matter what the choice.
        
       | 1970-01-01 wrote:
       | Purely poetic advice. If the local economy collapses, you will
       | very much want to move. There's still a 50% chance the first
       | spouse doesn't hold up until death. There are many schools that
       | give out degrees that aren't worth a wooden frame in today's job
       | market.
        
       | deadbabe wrote:
       | While it's true that all we need is one to work out, in general
       | we strive to be in positions where we have multiple options, not
       | just hinging everything on one passing chance. Life is less
       | stressful that way, and that's why people today feel like they
       | are under so much pressure and have little choice over how their
       | lives unfold.
        
       | samdoesnothing wrote:
       | Why are so many people in this thread purposefully
       | misinterpreting the post so they can criticize it? The author
       | obviously doesn't mean you only need one thing per domain to work
       | out in your lifetime, but the present. I.e you don't need two
       | girlfriends at once, even though you might have multiple
       | relationships throughout your life...
       | 
       | Sheesh. HN is grumpy today.
        
       | jmward01 wrote:
       | This is why having a safety net and resources to try again is so
       | powerful. Given enough chances you will make it, big. That means
       | the #1 factor in success is the number of chances you get to fail
       | and try again, not necessarily how inherently good you are. I try
       | to remind myself of this often. I have been given so many
       | chances, and I took them.
        
         | j45 wrote:
         | Well said, this is the real game to pursue. Best of continued
         | luck.
        
         | Aurornis wrote:
         | This always sounded intuitively correct to me, but looking back
         | over the past two decades basically all of the successful
         | entrepreneurs and business owners I know didn't come from
         | families with a lot of resources and didn't have much of a
         | safety net. They just went all in on their goals when they were
         | young and had many years ahead of them to start over if it all
         | went wrong.
         | 
         | Contrast this with some of the people I grew up who came from
         | wealthy families: A lot of their parents pushed them toward
         | entrepreneurship and funded their ventures, but to date I can
         | only think of one business from this cluster of friends that
         | went anywhere. When you come from such resources and wealth
         | that you don't need to succeed and you can drop the business as
         | soon as it becomes difficult, it's a different situation.
         | 
         | I don't know exactly what to make of this, other than to remind
         | myself to keep pushing through the difficult times for things I
         | really want even when I could fall back to an easy path and
         | give up.
        
           | jbs789 wrote:
           | If you don't have a fall back, you have no choice but to make
           | it work.
        
             | JustExAWS wrote:
             | Or fail miserably...
        
               | fragmede wrote:
               | Which we don't hear about. Except maybe via GoFundMe.
        
               | bbarnett wrote:
               | You know what?
               | 
               | Peter used to say, that every successful company could
               | look back at a defining moment early on, where they would
               | have died had it not been for the courage, and the
               | tenacity, and maybe the insanity of one visionary person
               | who put it all on the line, even though it seemed like a
               | huge mistake at the time.
               | 
               | A moment where all the metrics and the numbers didn't
               | mean anything.
               | 
               | It was all about the emotion. It was about belief,
               | rational or irrational.
               | 
               | And I think...
               | 
               | I hope that I just witnessed that.
        
           | zmmmmm wrote:
           | you can extend that to all Silicon Valley and the US in
           | general.
           | 
           | It has one of the weakest social security systems. Not even
           | proper healthcare is guaranteed. Yet it out innovates all of
           | Europe, Canada, Australia, other places that have incredible
           | social "safety nets".
           | 
           | I agree with the other commenter: safety nets and multiple
           | tries are always good to have, but persistence and grit are
           | even more important, and these come more from necessity.
        
             | bequanna wrote:
             | > Not even proper healthcare is guaranteed.
             | 
             | ...except it is. Health insurance is available on a sliding
             | scale based on income and essentially free for most low
             | income people.
        
               | nradov wrote:
               | Sure, although in some areas healthcare is effectively
               | unavailable to Medicaid plan members because providers
               | have stopped accepting those patients. Being insured
               | doesn't mean much if you can't schedule an appointment.
               | 
               | https://www.wsj.com/health/healthcare/medicaid-insurers-
               | doct...
        
               | agf wrote:
               | In some areas and for some people, Medicaid probably does
               | count as proper healthcare. But it certainly doesn't for
               | other people / other places. Imagine there being one
               | doctor within a multi-million person metro area who takes
               | Medicaid for some sub-specialty. 90 minutes away from you
               | by car. And you don't have a car. This is the reality for
               | millions of Medicaid recipients, including ones I know
               | personally in Chicago.
        
             | lordnacho wrote:
             | Most of the US graduates have their degree and a network to
             | fall back on. It's nice to have actual money in the bank,
             | but it can also be acceptable to have a high chance of
             | getting a rewarding job if the moonshot doesn't work.
             | 
             | In other words, human capital.
             | 
             | Most of the entrepreneurs I meet are not going to be
             | homeless if things don't work out. They'll be employed.
        
               | raw_anon_1111 wrote:
               | Exactly this many also have parents who can help
               | subsidize them, stay on their parents health insurance
               | until they are 26 and worse case move back home. This
               | isn't just the privilege rich, this can also be your mid
               | to mid upper income couple who can help their kids out.
        
               | lordnacho wrote:
               | Yep, and most of these fallbacks are insurance-like: you
               | can always say you never asked your parents for anything.
               | Like me. Thing worked out, so I didn't need their money.
               | But if they hadn't, I would have a place to sleep and
               | eat.
        
             | raw_anon_1111 wrote:
             | You can have all of the "grit" you want to and still fail.
             | You just never hear about the failures.
        
             | exceptione wrote:
             | > Yet it out innovates all of Europe, Canada, Australia,
             | other places that have incredible social "safety nets".
             | 
             | Probability: highly unlikely.
             | 
             | Speaking for Europe, I see a lot of silent innovation. No
             | press, no LinkedIn posts, not an article on their website.
             | There are a lot of US firms that shop in Europe for high
             | tech. (I know of instances were the US company buys the IP
             | from the EU supplier + take public credit for it + forbids
             | the supplier for showcasing their success in public.)
             | 
             | What is different is:
             | 
             | 1) the amount of money available in the US. The US enjoyed
             | a very beneficial position post-WOII, enabling them to run
             | high deficits.
             | 
             | 2) the US has a positive attitude to entrepreneurship. You
             | are not a failure when your company goes bankrupt, you
             | learn from it and you go-go-go.
        
               | enaaem wrote:
               | Also the EU lacks a unified capital market where infinite
               | VC money can be pooled together into any new hype. I
               | would argue this the biggest reason.
        
           | moralestapia wrote:
           | Every single western "entrepreneur" who starts making a
           | little more than 100k/year likes to tell itself this story.
           | 
           | Did you have any (real, not GenZ) mental or physical
           | disability?
           | 
           | Did you have a house to come back to every day? Did you have
           | a hot meal waiting for you whenever you wanted?
           | 
           | Did you have a community that supported you through your
           | business?
           | 
           | Did you have a legal structure around you that allowed you
           | not to worry about getting kidnapped/killed? A structure that
           | enforces getting paid after you've earned your money?
           | 
           | 98% of what you have was given.
           | 
           | I do agree, however, that a lot of people don't even bother
           | to put in the remaining 2%.
        
             | LPisGood wrote:
             | All of those things are great and should be afforded to
             | every Person. In many places, they are.
        
             | cadamsdotcom wrote:
             | "Can you start a business without $10m of family capital"
             | is a societal question.
             | 
             | "Can you start a business on an empty stomach without a
             | roof over your head" is not the same debate. Most people
             | need a roof over their heads as a prerequisite to almost
             | everything else in life and starting a business is WAY down
             | that list.
        
           | konaraddi wrote:
           | > looking back over the past two decades basically all of the
           | successful entrepreneurs and business owners I know didn't
           | come from families with a lot of resources and didn't have
           | much of a safety net
           | 
           | There's probably some truthyness to this but it doesn't
           | account for survivorship bias. And there's a baseline amount
           | of resources necessary to take a risk and be able to try
           | again (e.g., good luck taking a risk when preoccupied by
           | [lack of] health, housing, food).
        
           | enaaem wrote:
           | There is also survivor bias at play here.
           | 
           | Succeeding without safety net is hard -> only the best can do
           | it -> the best entrepreneurs you know did not had a safety
           | net
        
           | Normal_gaussian wrote:
           | I've seen quite a few of these funded entrepreneur-lifestyle
           | kids now; I've worked (briefly) with many of their companies.
           | Many of them are making enough of a real go at it such that I
           | can't tell them from others, but quite a few don't know
           | enough about how a default alive business works and deliver a
           | DoA even when the core idea or a short pivot works and has
           | traction - these guys need so much better PMF to succeed.
           | 
           | The best businesses I've seen parents find for their children
           | are lettings agents (urgh) and basic manufacturing (last mile
           | door assembly etc.). You can get the business model in a six
           | month course, the staff are minimum wage, the product is high
           | margin. If your parents buy the building you are so close to
           | default alive its a joke. Grow the business, flip it, and try
           | the big idea.
        
         | fragmede wrote:
         | That sounds good, but with a safety net, are you really going
         | to be hungry enough to make sure your one shot at getting out
         | of the ghetto doesn't fail? The entrepreneur that says to
         | themselves, if this doesn't work, I'll just ask mom for another
         | $300k at St Barts over Christmas doesn't sound like the one
         | sleeping under the desk at the office to get the demo ready for
         | TechCrunch Disrupt. Or maybe they are (to prove daddy wrong).
         | The human condition contains multitudes.
        
           | ikiris wrote:
           | Ahh yes, classic HN: "People only succeed/work hard if their
           | only other option is death"
        
           | ericjmorey wrote:
           | Gates, Bezos, Buffet, Musk all had enough hunger to beat out
           | literally everyone else
        
             | raw_anon_1111 wrote:
             | And they also all came from money.
        
           | flag_fagger wrote:
           | > doesn't sound like the one sleeping under the desk at the
           | office to get the demo ready for TechCrunch Disrupt
           | 
           | For what? Their garbage SaaS that barely works and is just a
           | thin veneer for advertisers to gorge on my data?
        
         | clichessuck wrote:
         | That's a cliche and it sucks. A safety net and family resources
         | correlate with nothing related to entrepeneurship and risk
         | taking.
        
           | raw_anon_1111 wrote:
           | This is definitely not true. How many people for instance can
           | go into journalism and do unpaid internships without family
           | support?
           | 
           | The entire idea of most entrepreneurs pulling themselves up
           | by their bootstraps in tech is a myth. Out of all of major
           | tech companies now, how many of the founders came from
           | disadvantaged backgrounds?
        
           | augusto-moura wrote:
           | Safety net and resources correlates heavily in almost all
           | aspects of your life, having a better life helps immensely in
           | any project you do in your life, including entrepreneurship
        
         | ryandrake wrote:
         | It's like a baseball game. Most people are benched their whole
         | lives. They never get a chance at the plate. More privileged
         | people with a lucky combination of the right family, the right
         | education, the right timing, and the right opportunity get an
         | at-bat, and they'll either strike out, or hit the ball. A few
         | very lucky people will get to stand at the plate maybe once or
         | twice more.
         | 
         | The wealthy get infinite at-bats. They get to stand at the
         | plate for however long they want, and swing and swing until
         | they get their home run. I worked with a founder like this. He
         | would always talk about his business's humble beginnings,
         | starting from a garage and so on--you know the story. What he
         | would neglect to admit was this was like his 7th try. Every
         | time he failed, he'd just chill on his family's couch, dreaming
         | up his next startup idea.
        
           | 1659447091 wrote:
           | I think it was _Outliers_ (Malcolm Gladwell) that talked
           | about a similar concept as well. Ignoring the 10k hour thing,
           | it also talks abut small compounding advantages that later
           | add up to more opportunity (for those that take it).
           | 
           | To go with the sports analogy, (paraphrasing, been awhile
           | since I read it) it mentions how birth date coinciding with
           | the youth sport season was a strong determiner of success at
           | that sport because being ~11 months older in the same age
           | group meant they were bigger faster more experienced and
           | would be played more, compounding increases in skill.
           | 
           | There was a similar concept floating around about darts,
           | where the poor get maybe one dart to throw, middle class a
           | few and wealthier get many. But I can't remember where I saw
           | or read that
        
         | raw_anon_1111 wrote:
         | This is not true. No matter how many different teams I try out
         | for, I as a 51 year old short male with a limp will never be a
         | star basketball player or ever make it to even the D leagues.
         | 
         | There are plenty of people who tried repeatedly to "succeed" in
         | their own company and failed. Let's say I did try to start my
         | own company at 22 10x and spent 3 years at each one. I'm now 52
         | and would have been better off just working those 30 years and
         | saving and investing with a lot less stress
        
           | busymom0 wrote:
           | I think the level of success one wants also require having a
           | check for delusion and realism. If a "51 year old short limp"
           | thinks they are going to be a star basketball player, they
           | are delusional and no longer realistic.
        
             | raw_anon_1111 wrote:
             | How many people right here on HN have you seen over the
             | years who built something and have no idea about marketing
             | or a go to market strategy or knew anything about sales?
             | 
             | That's the equivalent of a 51 year old with a limp not
             | being self award enough to know that I don't have the
             | skills to be a basketball player just because I can
             | dribble.
        
         | LPisGood wrote:
         | Out of curiosity (not accusation, I promise) how did you make
         | it?
        
       | stego-tech wrote:
       | Needed this today. Apparently the HN hive mind agreed.
       | 
       | All it takes, is for one to work out.
        
       | throwaway150 wrote:
       | I thought HN is supposed to upvote articles that gratifies one's
       | intellectual curiosity. Does this article gratify intellectual
       | curiosity? I don't understand why these shallow feel-good
       | articles devoid of any intellectual curiosity always get upvoted
       | to the top! There are so many high effort, substantive articles
       | at https://news.ycombinator.com/newest that nobody upvotes!
        
         | yehoshuapw wrote:
         | because even when it isn't why people come here, and if there
         | was too much of it you may be right - a message which brings up
         | a smile or warm feeling is enough for people to be thankfull
         | 
         | and that is a good thing
        
           | throwaway150 wrote:
           | Obviously the article is voted to the top. So the the lurkers
           | at /newest and the general HN audience must like this. Still
           | I wish though that upvoters stuck to the HN guidelines of
           | upvoting stuff that really gratifies one's intellectual
           | curiosity, not just some feel-good piece. There is no
           | shortage of other places where I can find feel-good articles.
           | I want HN to stick to HN guidelines.
           | 
           | This is all the more sad for me because among all the spam,
           | many high effort articles get posted to /newest but many
           | don't get the upvotes. These shallow, feel-good articles
           | always get the upvotes. I guess it takes more time to read
           | and appreciate a high effort article. So I understand why
           | this happens. But ...
        
       | throwaway314155 wrote:
       | I'm confused. This just seems like feel-good bullshit advice that
       | only works for people in extremely good circumstances.
       | 
       | There's a false equivalence between -
       | 
       | "All it takes is for one to work out."
       | 
       | and the following:
       | 
       | - "You don't need every job to choose you. You just need the one
       | that's the right fit."
       | 
       | - "You don't need every house to accept your offer. You just need
       | the one that feels like home. "
       | 
       | The latter assumes that _every_ attempt you make has a chance at
       | being "the right fit", "the one that feels like home". That is
       | not the way things works for 99% of us.
        
         | colecut wrote:
         | Unless you interpret 'working out' as being 'the right fit',
         | then it comes together pretty nicely
        
       | phkahler wrote:
       | And its always the last one you try. Just like every lost item is
       | found in the last place you look :-)
        
       | throwaway643384 wrote:
       | The "one that works out" can also give you a misrepresentation of
       | how the world works and a false sense of how lucky one should
       | expect to be over a long period of time.
       | 
       | At an earlier point in my life, I had been applying to many well-
       | known big tech companies right out of school (not a top school
       | either). I never got a reply from any of them so I ended up
       | accepting a local job with a non-tech company after months of
       | searching.
       | 
       | But I didn't give up my hopes and kept applying to big tech, and
       | while I did manage to get the occasional interview with some
       | mediocre companies or the random startup, I also miserably failed
       | all of them too.
       | 
       | At some point during my long period of despair at never getting a
       | better job, my very top pick (and arguably one of the best tech
       | companies in the world at the time) reached out to me. Even more
       | miraculously, I somehow passed their interview (the only tech
       | interview I passed in the prior year) and accepted a job there.
       | 
       | I _really_ enjoyed working there. Some of the best years of my
       | life. And my performance reviews were great too, so the imposter
       | syndrome from having failed so many tech job interviews sort of
       | faded into the background. But after a while, perhaps due to the
       | "hedonic treadmill" mentality, I thought I could do better. So I
       | left to join a startup.
       | 
       | Well, the startup failed, as startups tend to do, but what I
       | didn't expect and what caught me off guard was that I was now
       | back in the same situation I was in right after graduating from
       | college. Don't get me wrong--having "the name" on my resume now
       | meant I could get at least one chance at an interview about
       | anywhere. But much like the first round that I tried to forget
       | about, I once again failed all the interviews.
       | 
       | Unfortunately, this second time around never procured a "get out
       | of jail free" card.
       | 
       | So I guess my lesson is: 1) there's a lot of luck involved in
       | these things, 2) if life gives you a winning lottery ticket at
       | some point, don't throw it away for the chance to win an even
       | bigger lottery, and 3) that famous saying about "the only actions
       | regretted are those not taken" is absolutely, totally wrong--
       | almost all of my regrets in life relate to taking some action I
       | shouldn't have rather than inaction.
        
         | Sevii wrote:
         | A lot of people experienced that during the 2020 boom. The
         | lucky break wasn't a lucky break it was just a huge hiring
         | boom. Once that's over the status quo returns.
        
           | throwaway643384 wrote:
           | My lucky break occurred many years before the pandemic, but
           | after the original dotcom boom. Companies were neither hiring
           | nor firing like crazy.
        
         | _michaelhuang wrote:
         | It just sounds like you are in a middle of another journey my
         | friend.
        
         | EdNutting wrote:
         | Corollary: Choosing _not_ to do something is as much an action
         | as choosing _to_ do something. Which shines a bright light on
         | the meaninglessness of the phrase "the only actions regretted
         | are those not taken".
        
       | TeMPOraL wrote:
       | Bait & switch, though.
       | 
       | "All it takes is for one to work out." is not the same as "You
       | just need the one [job] _that's the right fit._ " or "You just
       | need the one [house] _that feels like home._ " or "You just need
       | _the one_ [life partner]. "
       | 
       | Author's examples are, spiritually, the opposite of their
       | friend's advice - in fact, "all it takes is for one to work out"
       | is something often said to people who lost hope _because they got
       | lost being too picky_.
        
         | QuantumGood wrote:
         | Simplifications always leave something out. It's like the three
         | body problem: people think one factor matters most, and one
         | other factor controls it. But once they realize there is a
         | third factor that alters one or the first two, or mediates
         | between them, it gets more complicated.
        
       | sdqali wrote:
       | The article is good, but I am more impressed by how the author
       | has been posting every day since May 12th, 2008.
        
         | nebezb wrote:
         | All it takes is one.
        
       | j45 wrote:
       | Beautiful piece and reminder.
       | 
       | If you're never done growing, you're never done peaking, nor ever
       | really done trying.
       | 
       | One working out can lead to the next way.
       | 
       | Wishing everyone well who this piece resonated with.
        
       | otras wrote:
       | On a much less optimistic dark humor note, this is the same
       | argument in _If Anyone Builds It, Everyone Dies_ about a
       | superintelligent AI emerging and being a threat to humans.
       | 
       | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/If_Anyone_Builds_It,_Everyone_...
        
       | wacper wrote:
       | This is a great approach! After every opportunity that closed on
       | me another arose, and it always was the better one.
       | 
       | Through these experiences I totally agree, and try to apply it to
       | life, but it's hard, even knowing that it's true. How cool is it
       | for every college, person, job offer, scholarship to want you?
       | 
       | Even though we're looking just for "the one" it's very hard for
       | me to mitigate the feeling of getting rejected, even knowing it
       | was not "the one". Rejection generally hurts, when you care about
       | the goal
        
       | jh00ker wrote:
       | Taking a break from studying for my interview in two days at a
       | FANG company, I checked Hacker News and this article was at the
       | top. I've been studying for this interview harder than any of the
       | others in the past. I feel well-prepared, but there's always the
       | luck factor. I hope this is a sign that this interview will be
       | the one to work out!
        
       | throwaway894345 wrote:
       | It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize this wasn't
       | about exercising.
        
       | EdNutting wrote:
       | Unfortunately, the "one" which accepts you, is no guarantee of it
       | being the one which "works out" (in the short or long term). My
       | experience is now 4x "found one that ultimately doesn't work out"
       | (each lasting 2 to 3 years).
       | 
       | I'm now taking time out to try to figure out how to escape the
       | confines of the career path I've taken to find something
       | different.
       | 
       | Open to suggestions of entirely different careers that I could
       | switch to that might have higher odds of not being toxic rat-
       | races full of people telling lies and bullshit just to survive.
       | 
       | But broader experience suggests the world of work just sucks
       | these days (and yes, it's these days - our parent's generation
       | had a brief period of doing 9-to-5 jobs which paid well enough to
       | afford homes, have families and social lives and holidays. We
       | don't get that now.). No wonder large numbers of my generation
       | are dropping out of the workforce...
        
       | manicennui wrote:
       | This is also the strategy of groups trying to pass oppressive
       | legislation.
        
       | pgt wrote:
       | I read this as: all you have to do is work out.
        
         | koakuma-chan wrote:
         | That's what it says.
        
         | PyWoody wrote:
         | Right? I thought the article was going to be about how
         | constructive having even a simple daily workout can be for
         | mental health.
         | 
         | After reading the article, I like my version better.
        
       | anonu wrote:
       | The corollary to this is "keep walking"... As my mom always tells
       | me.
        
       | hereforcomments wrote:
       | This St Peterburg paradox. I've just learnt it from Veritasium's
       | last video.
       | 
       | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St._Petersburg_paradox
        
       | notepad0x90 wrote:
       | "Is this where you stop?"
        
       | anttiharju wrote:
       | Reminds me of AlphaGo
       | 
       | It didn't try to maximise by how much it won, but just that it
       | won. Apparently it changed the meta for human pkayers.
       | 
       | If you have the time for it, the movie/doc is worth watching
       | https://youtube.com/watch?v=WXuK6gekU1Y
        
       | LunicLynx wrote:
       | Another saying i repeat to myself, which if gotten from a friend.
       | 
       | You have already lost, you can only win.
        
       | JustExAWS wrote:
       | I agree with his sentiments and his examples. But my fear is that
       | on a place like Hacker News, people might not understand the
       | difference between his advice and trying to have a successful
       | startup.
       | 
       | > _You don't need every job to choose you. You just need the one
       | that's the right fit._
       | 
       | When I'm applying for a job, I can apply for multiple jobs at
       | once and interview for multiple jobs over a a few weeks. It's
       | especially easy when I am both interviewing and working remotely.
       | I don't have to make excuses to leave work during the middle of
       | the day or worse case fly out for an interview.
       | 
       | The same is true for buying a home, I can put bids in for
       | multiple homes - or in my case just have my homes built in 2003
       | and 2016. I know the world is different now.
       | 
       | > _You don't need every person to want to build a life with you.
       | You just need the one._
       | 
       | This is one place where of course you can shoot your shot at
       | multiple potential partners and date often. What you don't want
       | to do is try marriage multiple times if it can be avoided. A bad
       | marriage will wreck every part of your life and a divorce will
       | set you back financially. (Happily remarried for 15 years after a
       | horrible first marriage.)
       | 
       | None of his examples are applicable to starting a business. 9/10
       | startups fail and even out of those that "succeed" only a small
       | number of those have an outsized return for the founder where
       | they wouldn't be better off financially working a regular old
       | enterprise dev job for those years let alone getting a job at
       | BigTech.
       | 
       | VCs can make multiple bets at one time and be more assured that
       | they capture the 1/10 startups that succeed than a founder.
       | 
       | There is a huge difference between being able to take multiple
       | chances at once in all of those scenarios and being stuck with
       | the 1/10 choices you make for multiple years.
        
       | thom wrote:
       | A corollary to this, for me at least, has always been: don't try
       | to fake your way into an opportunity. Be yourself, let people
       | pass on the real you if they want, because you don't want to land
       | a job where you can't thrive as yourself. Obviously there's great
       | privilege in that and sometimes you need to eat shit in order to
       | eat at all, but if you have the option I hope you're able to wait
       | for the right fit.
        
       | colecut wrote:
       | I read the title and thought it meant that if you just exercise
       | everything else will fall into place.
       | 
       | I should probably still try that.
        
       | nextworddev wrote:
       | It also takes just one big mistake to really make things
       | tougher...
        
       | asdfman123 wrote:
       | Maybe you need only one. I need universal adoration! Everyone
       | must love me!
        
       | koinedad wrote:
       | I basically repeated the same thing to my wife when I was
       | transitioning into software engineering. It's so true!
        
       | awesome_dude wrote:
       | A (possible) restatement of the oft quoted "They have to be lucky
       | all the time, we only have to be lucky once" (albeit only the
       | second half)
        
       ___________________________________________________________________
       (page generated 2025-11-29 23:00 UTC)