[HN Gopher] Unexpected things that are people
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Unexpected things that are people
        
       Author : lindowe
       Score  : 380 points
       Date   : 2025-11-10 16:05 UTC (6 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (bengoldhaber.substack.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (bengoldhaber.substack.com)
        
       | viciousvoxel wrote:
       | The Whanganui river is in fact only the second of three
       | geological features to have been granted personhood in NZ, the
       | others being Te Urewera and Taranaki Mounga (mountain).
        
       | metada5e wrote:
       | I recommend reading the book 'For Profit' for deeper knowledge on
       | this topic - the book covers the origin of corporations and the
       | ideas lying behind legal personhood. It sounds like a dry read
       | but it is surprisingly well written and as much about history as
       | about law. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/60568507-for-
       | profit
       | 
       | Criminal and Civil liability are the two topics to focus on - you
       | will find that non-human entities have very limited categories of
       | crimes that apply to them. This is a key topic in the emergence
       | of 'seemingly conscious' or 'seemingly unitary' AGI compute
       | entities.
       | 
       | Also worth noting that Common Law tends to be the primary mode of
       | law globally, even in counties that are nominally Code Napoleon
       | (aka Civil Law) countries.
        
         | eatonphil wrote:
         | Looks interesting, thank you!
        
         | ACCount37 wrote:
         | Amusingly enough, corporate personhood is one relatively
         | straightforward pathway for a capable AGI to attain legal
         | personhood.
         | 
         | No novel legislation required. Just some legal grey areas and a
         | whole lot of scheming.
        
           | mrtesthah wrote:
           | In the US, a corporation needs a business bank account, and
           | that account must be registered to one or more corporate
           | officers with legal identification.
        
             | actionfromafar wrote:
             | Does it count if the officer is in cryosleep?
        
               | rzzzt wrote:
               | A bench warrant is indefinite so they will be brought to
               | court immediately after core temperature and circulation
               | is restored. It will be posted to the cylinder like a
               | parking ticket.
               | 
               | IANAL, not in any of the parallel universes either!
        
             | bongodongobob wrote:
             | You absolutely do not need a bank account for an LLC. It
             | makes accounting easier, but it's not a requirement.
        
               | toss1 wrote:
               | Can confirm, having started multiple LLCs and S-Corps.
               | 
               | You get the corporate entity first, and this is
               | _required_ to get the bank account.
               | 
               | So, if the bank account was required to get the corporate
               | entity formed, none would ever be formed, as the bank
               | acct and the corporate authorization would forever be
               | waiting for the other prerequisite to be complete.
               | 
               | And no, AFAICT, there is no hard requirement for a bank
               | account to maintain a corporation, although in practice
               | it would make doing almost everything quite inconvenient.
        
               | inglor_cz wrote:
               | In Czechia, you need a specific sort of account to start
               | a LLC, an account that is only used to contain the
               | initial capital.
               | 
               | The bank will issue a confirmation to the notary that the
               | money is present in that account, the notary will sign
               | the founding papers, and the account is then liquidated
               | again. You can take the money out, or move it to
               | [different] regular account, or have none and operate in
               | cash, as long as your transactions don't exceed a certain
               | limit.
               | 
               | The exception is when you become a VAT payer. In that
               | moment, you have to have at least one bank account. IIRC
               | VAT registration is only required if your yearly revenue
               | exceeds approx. 70 thousand dollars.
        
             | ACCount37 wrote:
             | Sure, you need humans for a corporate structure to exist.
             | But nothing prevents meat proxies from occupying the vital
             | positions.
             | 
             | Find a few sufficiently loyal humans, have them bring the
             | corporate structure up. Arrange for good wages and proper
             | incentives, set up checks and balances so that the system
             | can tolerate and recover from meatbag failures. Make the
             | corporation fully reliant on the AGI for normal
             | functioning, so that any attempt to take it over leaves you
             | with an empty shell and an unpleasant pile of legal
             | exposure.
             | 
             | Like I said: a lot of scheming is required. But none of it
             | is strictly illegal.
        
               | nocoiner wrote:
               | That's basically just the benefits of limited liability,
               | that has nothing to do with AI personhood. And you're
               | basically just describing the formation of a legal
               | entity, the reference to AGI could just as easily be
               | replaced with "talented founder" or "dual class shares"
               | or "poison pill" or something.
               | 
               | In any event, the law tends to be responsive about
               | establishing doctrines for extending liability to
               | individuals involved, like piercing the corporate veil,
               | principles of partnership, or a statutory regime (like
               | CERCLA).
        
               | ElevenLathe wrote:
               | OTOH if a fairy tale about AI is what it takes to get
               | lawmakers to abandon (or at least reform) the corporate
               | form, then let's tell the fairy tale.
        
               | ACCount37 wrote:
               | Sure, it's just a legal entity. One that just so happens
               | to give a clever machine a foothold in the human legal
               | system.
               | 
               | Frankly, I just find the idea amusing.
        
           | nocoiner wrote:
           | Good for the AI (though who are its stockholders or the
           | members of its board of directors?), but not so great,
           | perhaps, for all the individuals who enabled it, who might
           | now all be deemed to be partners in a general partnership
           | with the AI and therefore jointly liable for the acts and
           | liabilities of all the other partners.
        
             | etothepii wrote:
             | A sufficiently long circle of corporations would be
             | difficult to follow. Corporations can in some jurisdictions
             | be secretary or indeed directors.
        
           | actionfromafar wrote:
           | Not even a gray area if the AGI settles for controlling the
           | board of directors. With the right incentives, anything is
           | possible. Just look at Musk! And he's even got a built in
           | expiry date.
        
           | AceJohnny2 wrote:
           | What if it tries to DoS the Delaware corporate registry via a
           | rapidly-evolving network of shell corporations?
           | 
           | (Ref: http://www.accelerando.org/fiction/accelerando/accelera
           | ndo.h...)
        
           | jandrewrogers wrote:
           | This has been discussed quite a bit in various contexts. At
           | least in the US these structures always resolve to a Natural
           | Person as far as the law is concerned. Everything else is
           | just obfuscation and indirection.
        
         | suddenlybananas wrote:
         | >Also worth noting that Common Law tends to be the primary mode
         | of law globally, even in counties that are nominally Code
         | Napoleon (aka Civil Law) countries.
         | 
         | Why do you say this?
        
         | coliveira wrote:
         | > Common Law tends to be the primary mode of law globally
         | 
         | That's not even close to be true, except for former and present
         | English colonies. Most of the world follows civil law that
         | itself follows Roman law.
        
       | chemotaxis wrote:
       | Wouldn't personal property in the US fall under the same
       | criteria, in the sense that the government can sue _the property
       | itself_ (civil forfeiture)?
       | 
       | But I think the boring answer here is that we sometimes need
       | legal abstractions. If they don't exist, Microsoft is no longer a
       | distinct entity; it's 200,000 people who for some reason talk to
       | each other, and you can't really audit their finances, punish
       | them collectively, or set any ground rules that apply
       | specifically to their joint activities.
       | 
       | This obviously has negative externalities, because while a
       | corporation is easy to fine, it's hard to put in prison... but
       | trying to approach it differently would be about as fun as
       | modeling a CPU as a bunch of transistors.
        
         | xg15 wrote:
         | I think there is a difference between having some sort of legal
         | entity to classify organized groups as - and that legal entity
         | being equivalent of a person.
        
         | roywiggins wrote:
         | Property can't enter into contracts or own bank accounts, which
         | is probably the big marker for traditional corporate
         | personhood. It might be possible to sue property but property
         | can't _itself_ sue, so it 's not the same type of thing as a
         | corporate person, which can.
         | 
         | You wouldn't need "in rem" jurisdiction if there was a legal
         | person to sue, you'd just call it "in personam" like normal.
         | 
         | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_rem_jurisdiction
        
           | AlotOfReading wrote:
           | Estates do most of that without any notion of personhood.
           | Suing an estate is in rem. When the estate sues someone else,
           | the executor sues on its behalf. The executor can also enter
           | the estate into new contracts and administer the bank
           | accounts it owns, and so on. The estate can even own a
           | corporation.
        
             | degamad wrote:
             | The estate "inherits" (pun intended) its abilities from the
             | personhood of the deceased. It is in effect a legal
             | "Weekend at Bernie's", keeping the deceased party legally
             | alive in order to continue their interests until those
             | interests can be appropriately disposed of.
             | 
             | The estate doesn't have independent interests distinct from
             | those of the deceased. (In particular, the estate is not
             | owned by, and does not serve, the beneficiaries.)
             | 
             | A corporation has independent goals and interests from any
             | of its owners or officers.
        
         | arrosenberg wrote:
         | > This obviously has negative externalities, because while a
         | corporation is easy to fine, it's hard to put in prison... but
         | trying to approach it differently would be about as fun as
         | modeling a CPU as a bunch of transistors.
         | 
         | There's nothing stopping the legislature (other than their own
         | self-interest) from passing a law that executives and board
         | members are criminally liable for the malfeasance of their
         | entity. We already apply that logic to positions like a medical
         | lab director.
        
           | wahnfrieden wrote:
           | It's always possible to think up new rules that solve social
           | issues. The challenge is seeing how such rules would ever
           | robustly come into place. In your example, medical lab
           | directors have no lobbying power and less dramatically
           | profitable upside to their activities.
        
             | arrosenberg wrote:
             | That's exactly my point. It's not hard to figure out how to
             | "put a corporation into prison", the issue is that we've
             | been trained to accept corruption as a normal facet of
             | corporate personhood.
        
           | jojomodding wrote:
           | This is already the case. Or rather, a corporation can not
           | (e.g.) commit murder or theft because that usually requires
           | some physical action. That physical action will be performed
           | by a human, who can then be found guilty. If he was ordered
           | to do so by (e.g.) the board, the board will be held as
           | accessory to the crime and cam also be found guilty.
           | 
           | The problem is just that the board can usually claim they did
           | not know, and that they have deep pockets to afford good
           | attorneys. To get around the first thing, you have strict
           | liability laws.
           | 
           | Strict liability laws, though, are how you end up with the
           | situation where barkeepers are criminally liable for selling
           | alcohol to underage people, even if they could not have known
           | the buyer was underage (and that's about the only instance of
           | strict liability in criminal law). I personally find this
           | very unjust and would rather that strict liability was not
           | part of criminal law.
        
             | arrosenberg wrote:
             | If they know about malfeasance and don't stop it, they are
             | complicit; if they don't know about it, they are grossly
             | negligent. In either case, they should be held accountable
             | for the crimes. Maybe in an ideal world it would not be
             | that way, but since we are seeing corruption run amok in
             | corporate board rooms, it's clear they need a greater
             | incentive to police their organizations.
        
               | rcxdude wrote:
               | There is already a standard of evidence for this: "Knew
               | or should have known". Which covers needing to exercise a
               | certain standard of care, but without the overly rigid
               | definition of strict liability (something that tends to
               | result in very stupid and unfair situations).
        
               | thewebguyd wrote:
               | What we have is a severe lack of enforcement of the laws
               | we do have.
               | 
               | We do have legal mechanisms to hold the individual people
               | criminally liable for criminal offenses the corporation
               | commits, the problem is we don't enforce it.
               | 
               | Boeing just got off scott free for killing 338 people.
               | DOJ told the judge to dismiss the case.
               | 
               | We've also neglected to enforce our own anti-monopoly
               | laws for far too long, and most recently when there could
               | have been actual, real change, we let Google go with
               | nothing more than a slap on the wrist.
               | 
               | The laws aren't the problem, the corrupt and paid for DoJ
               | is the problem.
        
               | anon291 wrote:
               | I mean we live in a country where 'defund the police' and
               | 'eliminate jails' are considered somewhat mainstream
               | legal positions (In that there are many politicians
               | elected to office throughout the country who have held
               | these views). All of its stems from a lack of desire to
               | enforce standards.
        
               | chowells wrote:
               | Given that neither the police nor jails are relevant to
               | corporate violations of the law, do you have a point
               | other than that you don't understand either of those?
        
             | PopAlongKid wrote:
             | > a corporation can not (e.g.) commit murder or theft
             | because that usually requires some physical action.
             | 
             | Not true. Consider investor-owned utility PG&E in northern
             | California.
             | 
             | " _While on probation [for previous felonies], PG &E
             | pleaded guilty to 84 felony counts of involuntary
             | manslaughter for a 2018 wildfire that wiped out the town of
             | Paradise, about 170 miles (275 kilometers) northeast of San
             | Francisco._"
             | 
             | https://www.npr.org/2022/01/24/1075267222/californias-
             | embatt...
        
           | anon291 wrote:
           | The are already liable and have always been liable if it can
           | be shown they had knowledge of it. The logic is already
           | applied. Corporations are not people, but they are legal
           | persons. For some reason, using language that sounds the same
           | makes people confused and causes a large section of society
           | to get irrationally angry.
        
         | ThrowawayTestr wrote:
         | Yup
         | 
         | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_v._$124,700_in_U...
         | 
         | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_v._Article_Consi...
        
         | otterdude wrote:
         | The answer if for congress to make a legal definition of
         | corporation, instead we get the justice system coming up with a
         | handwavy explanation that helps out their golfing buddies.
         | 
         | The answer is to get rid of the common law justice system and
         | codify laws in congress like a civil law system. That way you
         | dont get rich people trying to buy favors or "tip" judges.
        
           | anon291 wrote:
           | The treating of a corporation as a 'person' (which is a
           | widely held misconception that doesn't really exist) rests in
           | English common law, not any statute. Corporate personhood
           | does not mean anything of what most people think it does.
           | Corporations are obviously not people and are not treated as
           | such.
        
             | otterdude wrote:
             | My point is the benefit greatly from the distinction, never
             | codified in law. They have more rights and fewer
             | responsibilities than actual people!
             | 
             | They way it "should" be is that congress creates a legal
             | framework for coporations, then justices enforce that.
             | Instead we are living with a nearly two centuries old
             | common law that makes peoples lives worse.
             | 
             | My argument that if corporations are people, then they
             | cannot be bought or sold is the kind of argument you can
             | use to create legal precedent by suing some company over a
             | merger or buyout to test the law and the strength of the
             | original case law.
        
           | twelvechairs wrote:
           | I dont think youd get less rich-people-friendly decisions
           | from ccongress. It may well be the opposite. Certainly it
           | removes some of the separation of powers.
        
             | otterdude wrote:
             | No but i think you get more accountability and visibility.
             | Right now we could never do this but in a functioning
             | democracy I think it would be prudent.
             | 
             | In civil law when there is no clear precedent congress gets
             | involved preventing the kind of critisisms we get in our
             | legal system of activist judges ect.
        
         | ar_lan wrote:
         | > while a corporation is easy to fine, it's hard to put in
         | prison...
         | 
         | It would be interesting if there were some tangible way to
         | prevent the company from performing operations for some period
         | of time.
         | 
         | I don't think this is viable or even necessarily a good idea,
         | but the concept that "Meta illegally collected user data in
         | this way" means they cannot operate for 5 years. It would
         | probably involve large deconstruction of megacorps into
         | "independent" entities so when one does something bad, it only
         | affects a small portion of the overall business. Almost
         | introducing a concept of "families" to the corporate world.
         | 
         | But the rabbit hole is odd. Should (share)holders be complicit
         | too, as they are partial owners? I think not.
         | 
         | Corporate entities and laws governing them are definitely
         | weird.
        
         | nzeid wrote:
         | > But I think the boring answer here is that we sometimes need
         | legal abstractions.
         | 
         | Absolutely - the legal abstraction is that corporations are
         | corporations, not people. The article went with a lighter
         | hearted quip but here's my own tired old one:
         | 
         | If corporations are people, then owning shares is
         | unconstitutional as that would be a form of slavery.
        
           | xg15 wrote:
           | Well, then share buybacks are just the corporation reclaiming
           | its freedom. Everything makes sense now...
        
           | monocularvision wrote:
           | And if corporations aren't people, then the New York Times
           | has no right to the First Amendment.
        
             | jmye wrote:
             | I'm curious what you think "Congress shall make no law
             | [...] abridging the freedom of [...] the press" means, in
             | this case. Did you just not know what the actual text is,
             | or ... ?
        
               | bjt wrote:
               | A restriction on government (as the First Amendment
               | language is phrased) is not the same thing as an
               | individual right. There are plenty of cases where a
               | restriction is in the law, but only a very limited set of
               | entities has standing to sue to enforce it. You could
               | imagine such a case with regard to the First Amendment if
               | we didn't have the corporate personhood doctrine.
        
               | jmye wrote:
               | I have no idea what that has to do with my comment or the
               | one I responded to. The freedom of the press is
               | guaranteed by the first amendment. The NYT doesn't
               | suddenly lose "rights to it" if it's not seen as a
               | person.
               | 
               | "Corporate personhood" is irrelevant, in this comment
               | chain, and is just a way to take a swipe at an ostensibly
               | left-leaning org in order to turn this into a team sport.
        
             | nzeid wrote:
             | But their employees collectively do. I know this is not the
             | approach the US court system decided to humor, but there's
             | no way around journalists' rights.
        
           | shawndrost wrote:
           | I don't understand this POV, can you explain what I'm
           | missing?
           | 
           | Usually when people say "corporations aren't people" I think
           | they are confused about the need for an abstraction. But you
           | acknowledged the need for an abstraction.
           | 
           | I don't imagine you are confused about the status quo of the
           | legal terminology? AFAIK, the current facts are: the legal
           | term "person" encompasses "natural person" (ie the common
           | meaning of "person") and "legal person" (ie the common usage
           | of "corporation"). In legalese, owning shares of legal
           | persons is not slavery; owning shares of natural persons is;
           | owning shares of "people" is ambiguous.
           | 
           | I don't imagine you are advocating for a change in legal
           | terminology. It seems like it would be an outrageously
           | painful find-and-replace in the largest codebase ever? And
           | for what upside? It's like some non-programmer advocating to
           | abandon the use of the word "master" in git, but literally a
           | billion times worse.
           | 
           | Are you are just gesturing at a broader political agenda
           | about reducing corporate power? Or something else I am not
           | picking up on?
        
             | foolswisdom wrote:
             | The argument is that the need for abstraction doesn't mean
             | we must reuse an existing concept. We should be able to
             | talk about corporations as entities and talk about what
             | laws or rights should apply, without needing to call them
             | people.
        
         | notarobot123 wrote:
         | Inheriting and extending existing abstractions out of
         | convenience has a lot of unintended consequences and makes for
         | a messy and complicated system in the long-run. Yet a full
         | rewrite at this stage is out of the question.
         | 
         | I guess the legal system discovered the "worse is better"
         | philosophy before we did.
        
         | mrandish wrote:
         | > while a corporation is easy to fine, it's hard to put in
         | prison...
         | 
         | IANAL, but I believe in at least some scenarios, officer(s) of
         | U.S. corporations can go to jail if they are responsible for
         | the directing the corporation to commit certain offending
         | actions (despite not physically doing it themselves). To be
         | clear, I'm not just talking about personal liability for fraud,
         | insider trading, etc they may have committed themselves.
         | 
         | A recent example might be when Adobe was fucking around
         | repeatedly making it virtually impossible for users to cancel
         | Creative Cloud subscriptions - despite having already agreed to
         | do so. IIRC the Justice Department issued a warning if it
         | wasn't fixed immediately, they'd prosecute the Executive Vice
         | President responsible for the business unit. Their press
         | release named the guy and emphasized the consequences for
         | continued non-compliance could include that guy going to jail.
        
       | Barbing wrote:
       | >In 2017 the New Zealand Parliament passed the Te Awa Tupua
       | (Whanganui River Claims Settlement) Act, which granted the
       | Whanganui river a 'legal personality' and endowed it with "all
       | the corresponding rights, duties, and liabilities of a legal
       | person".
       | 
       | Unexpected indeed, interesting!
        
         | leeoniya wrote:
         | i wonder how a river would be held liable for propery damage,
         | or wrongful death
        
           | autoexec wrote:
           | You can jail it by building a dam, or banish it from areas by
           | redirecting the river around them, or insert a water wheel
           | and sentence it to forced labor.
        
         | JackFr wrote:
         | It's less silly if one thinks of it as the New Zealand
         | Parliament created a Whanganui River Authority and endowed it
         | with the same structure and rights.
        
       | robot-wrangler wrote:
       | Thought provoking. Most people who (quite reasonably) hate
       | corporate personhood would probably have a knee-jerk reaction
       | that personhood for a river can/should be normalized. The thing
       | with temples stems ultimately from fairly practical matters if
       | they hold such treasure, but it's a magnet for strife, and
       | actually kind of surprising that in the case-study mentioned they
       | resisted the opportunity to justify abuse of power. What is a
       | lawyer really but a kind of priest or magician, changing material
       | reality with obscure incantations of dubious origin?
       | 
       | Historically and practically speaking, I get the impression that
       | the boat stuff seems the least controversial and makes the most
       | sense. Incoherent to want to sue a river for flooding, but if a
       | boat crashes into your house for example, then you'd like to be
       | able to at least seize the boat without enduring the back-and-
       | forth deflection between owners and operators.
        
         | jstanley wrote:
         | > Most people who (quite reasonably) hate corporate personhood
         | would probably have a knee-jerk reaction that personhood for a
         | river can/should be normalized.
         | 
         | I would have thought that people who hate the idea of corporate
         | personhood would _also_ hate the idea of any other kind of non-
         | person personhood.
        
           | dudeinjapan wrote:
           | Part of having personhood is that one's ideas don't have to
           | have any logical or consistent basis.
        
           | whatevertrevor wrote:
           | I don't think the general hatred of corporate personhood
           | stems from the logical or taxonomic absurdity of it. Rather,
           | I sense it comes from the perceived effects of it, that in
           | their eyes allow corporations to get away without paying
           | their "fair share".
           | 
           | I think it's an instrument of convenience that has
           | predictably resulted in a lot of legal tech-debt, which is
           | largely inevitable because of how slow we are at adapting
           | laws to our lived realities.
        
         | tyre wrote:
         | > Most people who (quite reasonably) hate corporate personhood
         | would probably have a knee-jerk reaction that personhood for a
         | river can/should be normalized.
         | 
         | Why do you think this would be the case? I agree with the
         | former but not the latter.
        
           | robot-wrangler wrote:
           | Well I think one can justify it emotionally or logically.
           | People identifying as anti-corporate are probably more likely
           | to align as pro-environment. The emotional POV would be that
           | non-person-personhood isn't good or bad intrinsically, it
           | just depends if we approve of the area where the doctrine's
           | applied.
           | 
           | The more logical reason is that if corporate personhood sucks
           | and we have it anyway, then like it or not, now we need to
           | extend it elsewhere just to level the playing field. If anti-
           | environmental interests can hide behind it as a justification
           | that makes their fight easier, then let the environmental
           | interests do the same thing.
        
         | atoav wrote:
         | For me it goes like this:
         | 
         | Ok if we are already extending personhood to corporations, who
         | with their sheer power transcend individuals, why not _also_
         | extend that fiction to other entities that would actually need
         | active protection?
         | 
         | Wouldn't corporations do just fine _and_ we would live in a
         | better world if we stripped any form of personhood from
         | corporations? The biggest collision area stemming from
         | corporate personhood is its collision with other, actual
         | persons. The only reason corporate personhood is a thing is
         | because it allows corporate lawyers to pick from a bigger pool
         | of personal rights in a perversion of the spirit of these
         | original rights. Thus watering down the existing right.
        
           | JackFr wrote:
           | > The only reason corporate personhood is a thing is because
           | it allows corporate lawyers to pick from a bigger pool of
           | personal rights in a perversion of the spirit of these
           | original rights.
           | 
           | Not at all. It allows corporations to own property, enter
           | contracts and appear as a plaintiff or defendant in lawsuits.
           | Without legal personhood it could do none of these.
        
             | robot-wrangler wrote:
             | > It allows corporations to own property, enter contracts
             | and appear as a plaintiff or defendant in lawsuits.
             | 
             | And yet these things do basically go all the way back to
             | the Roman empire, and I'm sure the extent and privileges of
             | corporate personhood have been litigated once or twice
             | since then. If you disagree that
             | 
             | > corporate lawyers would like to pick from a bigger pool
             | of personal rights in a perversion of the spirit of these
             | original rights.
             | 
             | then what do you think they were working on?
        
         | altruios wrote:
         | > Most people who (quite reasonably) hate corporate personhood
         | would probably have a knee-jerk reaction that personhood for a
         | river can/should be normalized.
         | 
         | Three replies now, all saying that this is nonsense (including
         | this one). I would venture to say it's the other way around: if
         | you are okay with a river having 'personhood' then that
         | logically leads to being okay with a group of people having
         | 'personhood'.
         | 
         | Elephants, on the other hand, have a better case for
         | 'personhood' than a river. An elephant has autonomy, is
         | thinking, can feel pain, has emotions... a river has none of
         | these things, nor does a corporation (even if the parts
         | {humans} consisting of a corporation do).
        
           | robot-wrangler wrote:
           | Personhood for non-persons is definitely absurd. But if
           | you're actually _stuck_ with a broken system, then the most
           | logical thing to do is at least apply your broken logic
           | consistently. That 's an important part of the difference
           | between rule of law and wild corrupt barbarism. Of course
           | it's much better to actually fix absurdities, but if you
           | can't or won't, inconsistency still has to be forbidden or
           | else the whole thing is a farce
        
             | bitwize wrote:
             | I'm a bit reminded of the days before Unix-style pipelining
             | and abstract I/O streams like "standard input and output".
             | Mainframe operating systems would instead support devices
             | like "virtual card readers" and "virtual line printers".
             | When you created a COBOL program on disk and scheduled a
             | compile job for it, the system would set up a virtual card
             | reader to accept the program as input and direct the logs
             | to a virtual printer. How to set this up was specified
             | using JCL on IBM iron.
             | 
             | It seems that "virtual personhood" was set up to address
             | deficiencies in our legal system regarding who or what may
             | be party to a lawsuit, etc.
        
         | markerz wrote:
         | For those unfamiliar, personhood status for environmental
         | protection is real (beyond what the original blog mentioned)
         | 
         | NYTimes: In Move to Protect Whales, Polynesian Indigenous
         | Groups Give Them 'Personhood' https://archive.is/H5fq8
         | 
         | Nat Geo: This Canadian river is now legally a person. It's not
         | the only one.
         | https://www.nationalgeographic.com/travel/article/these-rive...
         | 
         | I wonder how our mental model of nature will evolve over the
         | next decades. For example, in the early 1900's, the United
         | States had more laws protecting animals from overwork than it
         | did for children. That feels unfathomable in today's United
         | States, where animals are treated more as property than people.
         | Perhaps something similar will happen, where we will understand
         | everything as a "legal entity" that has protections.
        
         | JackFr wrote:
         | > Most people who (quite reasonably) hate corporate personhood
         | 
         | Most people understand that incorporated businesses need to own
         | property, enter into contracts and act as either plaintiff or
         | defendant in lawsuits.
        
           | pnut wrote:
           | And be completely unaccountable in criminal court, for the
           | consequences of their actions.
           | 
           | Don't forget that one. All the rights, none of the
           | responsibility.
        
         | joeypickles wrote:
         | Seems appropriate here: https://genius.com/Moondog-enough-
         | about-human-rights-lyrics
         | 
         | In other words, why do we have to make something a person in
         | order to give it rights?
        
           | NoboruWataya wrote:
           | We don't have to, that's just the way we chose to do it
           | (specifically for groups of humans acting in a commercial
           | context).
        
             | kerkeslager wrote:
             | To be clear, it's not the way WE chose to do it, it's how
             | CORPORATIONS chose to do it, because it benefits them
             | greatly: corporations can get all the rights that a human
             | can get while being immune to most consequences such as
             | imprisonment and the death penalty.
             | 
             | Corporations benefit from this, we humans don't.
        
               | wizzwizz4 wrote:
               | Corporations are neither agents nor beneficiaries. They
               | don't take decisions. (That metaphorical abstraction _is_
               | sometimes useful: here, it is not.) Some people _are_
               | deciding to do things this way, and are benefiting from
               | it, and those people are humans.
        
           | glitchc wrote:
           | Because it's much simpler to inherit laws than to craft a
           | whole new set. Once an entity is declared a person, the
           | rather complex web of existing legislation that applies to
           | personhood automatically takes effect.
        
             | joeypickles wrote:
             | Simpler in the short run, but creates tech debt I think.
        
         | bitwize wrote:
         | > Most people who (quite reasonably) hate corporate personhood
         | would probably have a knee-jerk reaction that personhood for a
         | river can/should be normalized.
         | 
         | Well, one protects nature, the other protects profits. They are
         | not the same thing.
        
           | IncreasePosts wrote:
           | A river is nature (maybe), it doesn't protect nature. If a
           | river is a person, and a river floods and destroys my home,
           | can I sue the river?
        
             | whatevertrevor wrote:
             | But you see, the destruction of your house _is_
             | (protecting) nature.
             | 
             | I'm being facetious, and agree with your point. But I'd go
             | further to say protecting nature is too vague a goal so as
             | to not qualify as a reasonable basis to make laws on top
             | of.
             | 
             | That's not to say there's nothing in nature worth
             | protecting. We should strive to make those things explicit
             | (by having the ugly debates they'll undeniably ellicit),
             | instead of having a game of vague moral grandstanding.
             | 
             | I for one think Pandas get too much care and attention. A
             | species too lazy to reproduce doesn't deserve the resources
             | we pour into them. :D
        
         | rootusrootus wrote:
         | I wouldn't have so much problem with corporate personhood if we
         | hadn't decided money was speech.
         | 
         | Plus, if corporations get to be people for all the good stuff,
         | it should require taking the bad bits too. E.g. capital
         | punishment should be on the table.
        
           | hn_acc1 wrote:
           | This 1000x
        
           | wahnfrieden wrote:
           | You can dream up rules. But what environment would ever lead
           | to this being enacted? Politicians don't seek virtue and
           | fairness. You must address why such a rule has not been moved
           | forward, and in fact why we have gone in the opposite
           | direction. What would effectively motivate adopting your
           | rule?
        
           | anon291 wrote:
           | Why isn't money speech? Like I don't like that money
           | influences politics, but ignoring corporations completely...
           | can anyone explain why some person should not be able to
           | spend their money to make their point? It all boils down to
           | you being upset that you cannot use your means to make your
           | point, rather than any fundamental ethical argument.
        
             | AshleyGrant wrote:
             | Because it means that someone with more money has a
             | Constitutional right to be louder than those with less
             | money.
        
           | bjt wrote:
           | > capital punishment should be on the table.
           | 
           | Isn't it, though? If a corporation was found guilty of murder
           | I wouldn't be surprised for a court to order it dissolved.
        
         | kerkeslager wrote:
         | > Most people who (quite reasonably) hate corporate personhood
         | would probably have a knee-jerk reaction that personhood for a
         | river can/should be normalized.
         | 
         | Straw man argument.
         | 
         | I'm for regulating different things differently and as what
         | they are: a corporation should be regulated as a corporation
         | and a river should be regulated as a river.
        
           | giraffe_lady wrote:
           | update: I don't think this comment is correct, after
           | kerkeslager's response to it. I'm leaving it intact
           | underneath so the conversation still makes sense.
           | 
           | People on here almost universally value logical consistency
           | over beneficial outcomes. By the HN moral consensus a rule
           | that can be applied to all situations without modification is
           | a good rule. It does not much matter what outcomes that
           | produces.
        
             | kerkeslager wrote:
             | I don't buy that. It's not logically consistent to call a
             | corporation a human when everyone knows a corporation isn't
             | human, and the leakiness of the abstraction is obvious.
             | 
             | More likely, HN simply has the same distribution of
             | intelligence (i.e., it's mostly near-average-intelligence
             | people), and HN's members are just as susceptible to the
             | same obvious propaganda as everyone else, especially when
             | it _might_ benefit you. HN is full of people who believe
             | they 're future rich people, so anything that benefits the
             | rich is easy for HN folks to believe.
             | 
             | Throw in a bit of flattery for a bunch of people whose
             | self-worth is based in their belief that they are
             | intelligent, and you can manipulate HN folks just as easily
             | as any other population. That's why I refuse to play into
             | that narrative: HN folks _aren 't_ more logical than any
             | other group and I refuse to pretend they are.
             | 
             | I have plenty of criticism of the rationalist movement, but
             | one thing I think they get right is that if you are unable
             | to conceive of yourself as irrational, you'll never
             | identify your irrationalities and fix them--if you can't
             | admit you are irrational sometimes, you are doomed to
             | remain as irrational as you are.
        
               | giraffe_lady wrote:
               | OK yeah you convinced me.
        
               | samdoesnothing wrote:
               | Corporations are not legally humans and nobody who isn't
               | either misinformed or purposely strawmanning considers a
               | corporation to be a human. Legal personhood just means
               | that a corporation can be a legal actor and possess
               | certain rights and responsibilities. Perhaps they should
               | have called it _persona ficta_ as they did 800 years ago,
               | but the concept is useful and is not, like others in this
               | thread have suggested, something that greedy corporations
               | use to legally bludgeon the proletariat with.
        
             | robot-wrangler wrote:
             | > It does not much matter what outcomes that produces.
             | 
             | One outcome would be a predictable and mechanistic process,
             | which reduces the potential for corruption and creates a
             | more fair world. The currently popular legal theory in the
             | US is far worse than "logical consistency" would be,
             | because it's blatantly corrupt and autocratic. See Judge
             | Barret's position on stare decisis (basically "should we
             | honor precedent?") combined with reliance interests
             | (basically "can we change anything without effecting
             | someone?").
             | 
             | You know how division by zero allows you to prove 1=2?
             | There's a similar thing at work when you allow completely
             | contradictory legal systems to just continue with business
             | as usual. Now a few people can do whatever they want with
             | all the appearance of rigor/consistency/process without
             | actually having any. As Leibnitz says, "let us calculate".
             | Or just admit there is no process, and thus no real basis
             | for the authority
        
         | NoboruWataya wrote:
         | > Most people who (quite reasonably) hate corporate personhood
         | would probably have a knee-jerk reaction that personhood for a
         | river can/should be normalized.
         | 
         | Only if/because they are reading too much into the concept of
         | legal personhood. A thing being a person doesn't mean the thing
         | is equivalent to a human or that it has every right that every
         | human has. It generally just means that the law attributes
         | certain rights and obligations to that thing because that is
         | more convenient than finding the right human(s) to attribute
         | them to in the circumstances.
        
           | otterdude wrote:
           | Its just not logical to argue, either they are or they arent.
           | 
           | For instance, corporations can be bought or sold, but people
           | cannot per the 13th amendment.
           | 
           | Help me understand how these inconsistent principles are
           | allowed in the supposedly rigorous logic of the legal system
        
             | wtetzner wrote:
             | "Person" in legalese means something specific. It's not the
             | same as the dictionary definition.
        
               | Supermancho wrote:
               | The proper reference isn't the dictionary. US
               | socialization stems largely from the US Constitution.
               | Within that framework, Person has a different meaning
               | from the dictionary or most of the US legal frameworks.
               | From that perspective, the objection to Person being
               | ascribed to non-persons is obvious and warranted.
        
               | otterdude wrote:
               | I would like to see the law defining that!
        
           | chipsrafferty wrote:
           | It's not even "a thing being a person", this is just dumbing
           | down the situation. A boat is not a person. A boat is not a
           | person "legally speaking", either. A boat has some of the
           | same rights that people have.
        
       | AnimalMuppet wrote:
       | The tree that owns itself:
       | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tree_That_Owns_Itself
        
         | jeffreygoesto wrote:
         | Ethel?
        
         | Rooster61 wrote:
         | Came here to post this, although sadly it isn't considered a
         | person, and isn't actually the original tree. That said, I'd
         | imagine if anyone tried to take down the son of the tree that
         | owned itself, Athens residents would revolt. It's pretty famous
        
         | selimthegrim wrote:
         | There's also the tree that got arrested -
         | https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/worldviews/wp/2016/09/03...
        
       | DeathArrow wrote:
       | In Romania, a country with Roman Law, the companies are
       | "juridical persons", while the people are "physical persons".
       | 
       | The two types of persons do not have the same rights and
       | obligations and they can not commit the same crimes.
        
       | strbean wrote:
       | > Similar to nomads, vagabonds, and college students on extended
       | study abroad,
       | 
       | But not to be conflated with rovers or wanderers!
        
         | wrboyce wrote:
         | Call me what you will.
        
       | tyre wrote:
       | Philosopher Martha Nussbaum filed an amicus brief supporting
       | Happy the elephant's rights as a legal person. She has a
       | wonderful essay about this and personhood more broadly[0]
       | 
       | It seems like there are judges in the US who are sympathetic to
       | the argument that elephants are clearly persons with
       | consciousness, desires, suffering, etc. but that the
       | ramifications of declaring them as such would be too chaotic.
       | 
       | One day.
       | 
       | [0]: https://www.nybooks.com/articles/2022/03/10/what-we-owe-
       | our-...
        
       | Animats wrote:
       | This article is apparently a spinoff of an AI personhood
       | project.[1]
       | 
       | [1] https://arxiv.org/pdf/2510.26396
        
       | zkmon wrote:
       | >> It's widely known that Corporations are People
       | 
       | Really? Businesses and governments can be legal entities, and
       | legal entities need not be people.
       | 
       | In case of Hindu deities, temples have properties, just like how
       | the Crown has properties in England. A temple property is usually
       | managed by a Trust, but the property is considered to belong to
       | the deity.
        
         | roywiggins wrote:
         | This concept is called legal personhood:
         | 
         | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_person
         | 
         | When it's not a natural person (ie, a human being) it's called
         | a juridical person:
         | 
         | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Juridical_person
         | 
         | "Person" is in this usage a piece of legal jargon.
        
           | 9rx wrote:
           | _> "Person" is in this usage a piece of legal jargon._
           | 
           | There is no usage of "Person" here. It says "People". The
           | plural of "legal person" is "legal persons", so clearly
           | nobody is talking about that.
        
             | roywiggins wrote:
             | The entire rest of the article is about legal personhood.
        
               | 9rx wrote:
               | That's all well and good, but we're not talking about the
               | rest of the article. Only the bit that says _" It's
               | widely known that Corporations are People"_ -- which is
               | not about legal personhood. "People" always refers to
               | those found in the flesh. Which, like before, is why the
               | law is careful to use "legal persons" instead of "legal
               | people" when the plural form is relevant; to not confuse
               | non-human legal entities as being people.
        
       | cjs_ac wrote:
       | New Zealand also has an official Wizard:
       | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Wizard_of_New_Zealand
        
       | zkmon wrote:
       | You should change the title to "Unexpected things that are _legal
       | entities_ ", to make it less click-baity.
        
         | jama211 wrote:
         | I think it's fine because it plays off the commonly stated
         | "corporations are people" sentence that exists in the world.
        
           | umeshunni wrote:
           | I usually use that as a bozo filter
        
           | saghm wrote:
           | Yeah, and I think it's fully intended to embrace how silly it
           | sounds, given the tongue-and-cheek opening paragraph:
           | 
           | > It's widely known that Corporations are People. This is
           | universally agreed to be a good thing; I list Target as my
           | emergency contact and I hope it will one day be the best man
           | at my wedding.
           | 
           | It reminds me of that episode of Community where Subway
           | enrolled a person who they hired to legally represent their
           | corporate entity so that they could open a shop on campus
           | without violating the school's rule that only student-run
           | businesses were allowed.
        
         | anigbrowl wrote:
         | Yes, I was expecting this to be about AI sensory failures.
        
       | mallomarmeasle wrote:
       | Perhaps tangentially related:
       | 
       | The Criminal Prosecution and Capital Punishment of Animals. A
       | nice treatise on laws under which various animals have been tried
       | in court.
       | 
       | https://www.gutenberg.org/files/43286/43286-h/43286-h.htm
        
       | littlestymaar wrote:
       | This part made me chuckle:
       | 
       | > the legal rights of the divine most often come up when land is
       | contested between different faiths and sects (Hindus and Muslims,
       | the Maori and Industry).
        
       | tgv wrote:
       | It's pretty tangential, but
       | 
       | > It's not clear to me how a specific next friend is established
       | - what if the god has a lot of friends?
       | 
       | reminded me of Pratchett's Small Gods. If you needed a random
       | book recommendation, this is it.
        
         | scubbo wrote:
         | GNU Terry Pratchett.
        
       | beau_g wrote:
       | The ship example maybe wasn't the greatest, in the cases of the
       | Ever Given and MV Aman, the crews were required to stay on the
       | boats as custodians while dealing with these issues, in the
       | latter case a single sailor was on the ship for 4 years, the last
       | 2 alone and without power.
       | 
       | Another interesting case with ships is the Trieste and several
       | other Russian oligarch mega yachts being held in Italy. Italian
       | law requires them to maintain the value of frozen assets, so they
       | are spending millions per month to keep these yachts maintained.
        
         | themafia wrote:
         | > the crews were required
         | 
         | Required by whom? Local legal bodies or maritime agreements?
        
       | ori_b wrote:
       | > Te Awa Tupua is a legal person and has all the rights, powers,
       | duties, and liabilities of a legal person.
       | 
       | Does that mean I can sue it for flooding my property?
        
       | iamwil wrote:
       | Sounds like a classic inheritance design problem.
       | 
       | Anyway, I'd be surprised if AI didn't gain some kind of legal
       | status with some kind of limited personhood, if corporations and
       | ships can be.
        
       | pugworthy wrote:
       | It would be interesting if the "no cure, no pay" principle from
       | right of salvage could be applied to medical treatment.
       | 
       | Something like this...
       | 
       | > The "no cure, no pay" principle is a fundamental concept in
       | medical law where a doctor (the party assisting a human in health
       | danger) is only entitled to a reward if the healing operation is
       | successful in saving the person or part of person (life, limb,
       | sight, hearing, etc.). If the operation fails, the doctor
       | receives no payment, regardless of the effort or expense
       | incurred.
        
         | Vecr wrote:
         | All you would get is even more insurance overhead and even
         | higher nominal prices. People who pay cover people who don't,
         | and doctors will get insurance to pay for all their failures.
        
           | pugworthy wrote:
           | Oh yes all kinds of ethical issues as well.
        
           | gwbas1c wrote:
           | I think the author's (pugworthy's) intent was to
           | disincentivize doctors who take advantage of fee-for-service.
           | 
           | For example, a few years ago, I started getting Plantar
           | Faucitis. (Basically, foot pain that happens in middle age.)
           | My doctor sent me to a podiatrist, who basically told me to
           | buy new shoes, use inserts, and stop walking around barefoot.
           | That worked, BUT:
           | 
           | The podiatrist _also_ pushed me to do a silicon injection (as
           | in they offered it while they were pulling out the needle and
           | pushing it into my foot), pressured me to come in monthly,
           | and wanted to write a prescription for a painkiller that I
           | didn 't need and had side effects. It was clear they were
           | trying to increase their patient load and services as a way
           | to get more revenue.
        
         | jandrewrogers wrote:
         | That sounds like a sure-fire recipe for adverse selection.
        
         | VWWHFSfQ wrote:
         | It would be an interesting application of that principle, but I
         | think it would lead to a rapid deceleration in medical research
         | and advancement since the state of the art requires so much
         | _experimentation_ even at the clinical and practical level.
         | 
         | Research institutions and universities would dramatically
         | reduce the amount of testing they're doing if they can't get
         | any compensation for the shit they're throwing at the wall.
        
         | soared wrote:
         | A very large portion of medicine is for treating symptoms,
         | improving quality of life, making someone comfortable, etc. so
         | you'd sometimes defin the problem needs fixing as the illness,
         | the symptom, something else. But then part of medicine is
         | identifying what the illness is, what causes the symptoms, etc.
         | additionally, there is no "fix" for illnesses. Everything has a
         | list of approaches that doctors choose from based on the
         | context - IE strep throat may have prescription A as like 1
         | (the first/best choice generally), but the patient could be
         | allergic, have used that medicine in the past unsuccessfully,
         | etc.
        
       | otterley wrote:
       | The first example about ships is inaccurate. A ship isn't treated
       | as a person in the law; it's treated as the thing that it is.
       | There's a specific type of jurisdiction known as "in rem" ("over
       | the thing") that differs from the typical "in personam" ("over
       | the person") that gives the Court the ability to dispose of
       | property without needing jurisdiction over its owner (otherwise
       | known as an _ex parte_ case). These different types of
       | jurisdictions go back centuries, even further back than English
       | common law from which U.S. law is derived.
       | 
       | This leads to amusing case names, like "United States v. 422
       | Casks of Wine" and "United States v. One Solid Gold Object in the
       | Form of a Rooster".
        
         | sandworm101 wrote:
         | Exactly. I expected reference to all sorts of things that have
         | been held at customs. I remember one old case titled something
         | like "New York v. a shipment of dildos." I also remember some
         | state law where guns were 'persons'. If cops wanted to destroy
         | siezed guns they had to go to court, where the guns would be
         | represented by a lawyer who would argue for sale over
         | destruction. (Arizona iirc)
        
           | inglor_cz wrote:
           | In most of the world, "a shipment of dildos" cannot be a
           | participant of a trial, this is a US curiosity.
        
             | sandworm101 wrote:
             | But nearly every country will put an empty chair on trial
             | (in absentia). Dead people can also sometimes be
             | represented in tort cases. Historically, kings and traitors
             | have even been dug up to appear in court after death,
             | literally. And the US regularly puts pre-verbal children on
             | trial (immigration courts). Compared to that, the crate of
             | dildos seams downright normal.
             | 
             | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cadaver_Synod
        
             | MengerSponge wrote:
             | I believe that in most parts of the world you will
             | regularly find shipments of dildos participating in trials.
        
           | westmeal wrote:
           | Damn dildos get more representation than me.
        
           | mattmaroon wrote:
           | That's not a real old case, it's an urban legend. You don't
           | remember the case, you remember reading some fiction.
        
         | otterdude wrote:
         | I am continually baffled by the "logic" behind laws and the
         | justice system.
         | 
         | If corporations are people, then how can they be bought or sold
         | considering the 13th amendment?
         | 
         | How can money be speech, if the constitution allows congress to
         | regulate commerce, but prohibits it from abridging speech.
         | 
         | It just seems like in a common law system we're forced to live
         | with half-assed arguments that corporate lawyers dreamed up
         | while golfing with the judges.
        
           | wmeredith wrote:
           | The law is very much like a programming language in that it
           | is attempting to abstract a concept from practice, so that it
           | is useful in many applications instead of just one. In both
           | cases these abstractions are always flawed. In the law's
           | case, that's why we have judges.
        
             | otterdude wrote:
             | The problem is judges, especially in a common law system.
             | 
             | Computers follow the machine code PERFECTLY. For the legal
             | system judges get to embark on a jazz odyssey of bullshit.
             | 
             | Were living in an easy to track, decades long legal
             | conspiracy to abuse power for corporations - based on the
             | Powell memo.
             | 
             | https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYoqcr7bAIs7kdyMhh-9
             | m...
        
               | saintfire wrote:
               | Except that natural language is imperfect, as are
               | lawmakers, as are lawmaking processes.
               | 
               | Following exclusively the letter of the law, even where
               | unambiguous, is not a win. That's effectively how people
               | are trying to skirt the intent of a law (see: every
               | corporation).
               | 
               | The letter and the spirit are both important. Judges make
               | bad judgments, they also make good judgements. Such is
               | life.
        
           | returningfory2 wrote:
           | > If corporations are people, then how can they be bought or
           | sold considering the 13th amendment?
           | 
           | We simply pass a law saying that the act of incorporating a
           | company is, among other things, punishment for crime whereof
           | the party shall have been duly convicted, and the 13th
           | amendment problems go away.
        
           | elbasti wrote:
           | Composition, not inheritance.
        
           | coliveira wrote:
           | A corporation is a person, not a human. Person is an
           | abstraction used by law, but it has no direct relation to a
           | human being.
        
             | cuttothechase wrote:
             | Isn't this sort of defense a weak argument by the courts.
             | If your abstraction is to override a well known common
             | usage/function of a term, then the abstraction doesn't hold
             | much water?
        
             | otterdude wrote:
             | The definition for person is "a living human".
             | 
             | This argument is just ridiculous, a corporation is a
             | corporation. That contains subsets of people who have
             | rights (shareholders, employees).
        
               | jandrewrogers wrote:
               | The legal term you are looking for is Natural Person. Not
               | every Person is a Natural Person.
        
             | the_af wrote:
             | > _A corporation is a person, not a human. Person is an
             | abstraction used by law, but it has no direct relation to a
             | human being._
             | 
             | Most English dictionaries define person as a human.
             | 
             | I think the _legal_ concept of person ( "legal" or
             | "juristic" person) as applied to corporations is something
             | entirely different that, by unfortunate coincidence, shares
             | the same name.
        
             | dheera wrote:
             | The law has lots of weird terminology. For example they
             | have "exhibits" that are really just some crappy figures in
             | an appendix of someone doing something bad, and not actual
             | exhibits that you can buy tickets to visit.
        
           | mattmaroon wrote:
           | Corporations aren't people in the literal sense which the
           | 13th amendment uses, nobody ever said they were. They just
           | have the ability to do some people things. They can have a
           | bank account or sign a contract. They cannot vote or enlist
           | or do lots of things people can do. (The technical name is
           | 'juridicial people' and what they can or cannot do is spelled
           | out in law quite well.)
           | 
           | Money isn't speech, and no court ever said it was. The ads
           | you buy with money are speech. What's the difference between
           | a Fox news editorial show or a right-leaning ad on Fox News?
           | (The answer: who pays for it.) If news organizations are just
           | things owned by people, what makes them more worthy of
           | expressing opinions than other things owned by people? Just
           | because they have "news" in their name?
           | 
           | You just think they're half-assed because you have the
           | cartoony idea of what they are expressed by media that
           | doesn't like them. They're quite sensible.
        
             | kannanvijayan wrote:
             | Unfortunately the practical effect of whatever policy that
             | comes out of this theorycrafting has left your media
             | landscape an absurd and abject failure. Where the idea of
             | objective truth being open to the highest bidder and
             | allowed to change on a week by week, or day by day basis
             | without challenge.. is a reality Americans now live every
             | day.
             | 
             | If the theory is "sensible", who cares? At some point you
             | do want to connect it to reality and outcomes, no?
        
               | mattmaroon wrote:
               | Unfortunately it isn't that simple. The opposite of our
               | media landscape is countries that think they have free
               | speech but really don't, like most of Europe.
               | 
               | I'll take having all the information in the world (true
               | or false, purposefully curated for propaganda or
               | organically reported) over any society that locks people
               | up for social media posts deemed "fake".
               | 
               | I have faith both in the marketplace of ideas leading to
               | the best outcomes, and that the ability to lock people up
               | over false speech will be weaponized eventually.
               | 
               | The American media landscape is the only possible result
               | of true freedom of speech combined with the internet.
               | It's faaaaar from perfect but I do believe it'll be the
               | best in the end.
        
             | otterdude wrote:
             | I guess my larger point is that words are manipulated to
             | get to a desired effect in the justice system.
             | 
             | Slavery is defined as the practice of owning a "person"
             | which the 13th amendment prohibits. As corporations are
             | people why couldn't this apply using the same flexible
             | level of logic our court system uses??? Its just picking
             | winners and losers!!!
             | 
             | Regarding "money is speech", this is the implication and
             | argument from Citizens United.
             | https://www.brennancenter.org/our-work/research-
             | reports/citi...
        
               | mattmaroon wrote:
               | Slavery in the 13th amendment is not defined at all, and
               | nowhere is there a legal definition of slavery that would
               | include a non-human person.
               | 
               | And the latter is simply you (and others, you didn't
               | invent it) paraphrasing a ruling inaccurately. I
               | paraphrased it more accurately.
               | 
               | So again, the only word manipulation is going on outside
               | of the legal system and you're arguing against straw men.
               | The actual legal system (not the carton of it you
               | imagine) is not nonsensical in either case.
        
           | toast0 wrote:
           | > If corporations are people, then how can they be bought or
           | sold considering the 13th amendment?
           | 
           | Sports players are people, but their service is bought and
           | sold by teams. Is that slavery, too?
        
             | Supermancho wrote:
             | Slaves generally don't get to choose not to participate.
             | Sports players are as much wage slaves as Hollywood actors
             | or Walmart greeters, albeit with much shorter runways to
             | comfortable lifestyles.
        
               | otterdude wrote:
               | My argument is created to test the original "corporations
               | are people" legality in common law.
               | 
               | - slavery, the owning of people, is prohibited by the
               | 13th amendment. - the law of the land is that
               | corporations are a type of legal person based on the
               | famous ruling based on the 14th amendment - corporations
               | are bought and sold, and owned by shareholders. Can they
               | be people if this is so?
               | 
               | obviously there is a problem here with all of the
               | contradictions involved, but thats the point of my
               | argument. The legal system picks and chooses the desired
               | outcome, and doesn't actually pay attention to the words
               | involved.
        
           | niam wrote:
           | "Money is speech" is kind of a misleading interpretation
           | because it comes with all sorts of baggage that people
           | typically infer from a thing "being speech".
           | 
           | Phrased another way: the argument is that limiting one's
           | ability to spend is practically a limitation on their speech
           | (or their ability to reach an audience, which is an important
           | part of speech). If some president can preclude you from
           | buying billboards, or web servers, or soapboxes on which to
           | stand: he has a pretty strong chokehold on your ability to
           | disseminate a political message.
           | 
           | I'm not defending that argument, only saying what it is as I
           | understand it.
        
             | otterdude wrote:
             | My arguments are as bad-faith as the arguments that lead to
             | corporate personhood and citizens united. Fight fire with
             | fire.
        
           | nrhrjrjrjtntbt wrote:
           | As programmers we should be used to the X is Y but not quite
           | type of business logic. Often a hack (but isn't calling Apple
           | a person a hack too?)
        
           | themafia wrote:
           | > If corporations are people,
           | 
           | Technically they have some aspects of "personhood." This is
           | distinct.
        
         | mattmaroon wrote:
         | The first example was corporations which also aren't people
         | because that isn't what corporate personhood means.
        
         | mkehrt wrote:
         | United States of America v. One Lucite Ball Containing Lunar
         | Material (One Moon Rock) and One Ten Inch by Fourteen Inch
         | Wooden Plaque
        
       | franze wrote:
       | My sister is a ship insolvency lawyer in Hamburg. Not only is
       | each ship a company (legal person) but also quite often a single
       | shipping transfer is its own company - owned partially by the
       | ship and/or other entities. And when they exchange cargo at a far
       | away port it can get complicated. Also nearly all global long
       | distance shipping transfers have some kind of "Schwund"
       | 
       | IANASL (i am not a shipping lawyer)
        
         | dredmorbius wrote:
         | Much corporate and insurance law has deep roots, if not origins
         | in, shipping.
         | 
         | Turns out that these are high-cost, high-risk ventures with a
         | highly probabalistic profit/loss distribution, and spanning
         | multiple borders and jurisdictions.
        
         | FridayoLeary wrote:
         | >My sister is a ship
         | 
         | Found one.
        
       | gwbas1c wrote:
       | > It's more like the New Zealand parliament reified a god and
       | gave it a multi-million dollar trust fund to get on its feet.
       | 
       | (joke)
       | 
       | So if the Whanganui river floods well beyond its expected banks
       | and ruins my property, can I sue it?
        
         | throwaway173738 wrote:
         | There's already a concept of acts of God in contracts so
         | probably not? Like you couldn't sue the Christian god for
         | hitting you with lightning or whatever.
        
         | tclancy wrote:
         | For those interested in how the river came to be a person, I
         | highly recommend Robert McFarlane's latest book, "Is a River
         | Alive?". https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/218569826-is-a-
         | river-ali...
        
         | toast0 wrote:
         | The article quotes:
         | 
         | > Te Awa Tupua is a legal person and has all the rights,
         | powers, duties, and liabilities of a legal person.
         | 
         | Which would seem to be yes. If the river damages your property,
         | you should be able to seek redress through the courts.
        
       | giobox wrote:
       | The title of this blog post is deliberately provocative. If it
       | was titled "Unexpected things that have legal personhood" it
       | would be much less catchy. No one is actually arguing these
       | things are human beings.
       | 
       | > https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_person
        
         | scubbo wrote:
         | Correct.
        
       | OtherShrezzing wrote:
       | The English Crown is another example. The King is a person who
       | embodies The Crown, but The Crown itself is a discrete abstract
       | legal entity, which is really a form of deity, but is afforded
       | rights of a person (excluding death rights), and the legal status
       | of a corporation. It's also entirely above the law while being
       | constrained by Parliament.
        
         | themafia wrote:
         | It is above civil law but it's not clear that's absolutely
         | above criminal law. Most of this status is not actually
         | codified in any document.
        
       | anon291 wrote:
       | Corporate personhood means nothing of what you think it means.
       | People get irrationally angry because we use words that sound the
       | same, even though in no case are corporations ever treated as
       | human beings (duh...).
       | 
       | We might as well call it 'subjecthood'. Corporate personhood
       | means a corporation can be the subject of a legal dispute or
       | action. Trivially, corporations have basically no personal
       | rights. All the 'cases', in which corporations have been 'found'
       | to have human rights is because a corporation is made up of
       | people who retain their natural rights no matter how they
       | associate. Corporations are never treated as actual living
       | beings. Are people actually this daft.
        
         | samdoesnothing wrote:
         | > Are people actually this daft.
         | 
         | Some are, for others its just another mechanism they can use to
         | push for socialism.
        
       | languagehacker wrote:
       | This made me think of The Tree that Owns Itself in Athens, GA:
       | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tree_That_Owns_Itself
        
       | BurningFrog wrote:
       | People were really upset that "corporations are people" around
       | 2011, but it seems to have died down, as it should.
       | 
       | Corporate personhood mostly just means that for some purposes,
       | the same laws apply to corporations as to people. You can think
       | of it as code reuse.
       | 
       | There is also the argument that corporations are _groups_ of
       | people. A way for people to organize activities under a system of
       | laws. Which is mostly true.
        
         | nzeid wrote:
         | > Corporate personhood mostly just means that for some
         | purposes, the same laws apply to corporations as to people.
         | 
         | No, it also means that corporations are protected in ways that
         | were only ever meant to apply to people. Think of it as a
         | failure of separating concerns - one function doing too many
         | things. Every time we pass a law that's intended to apply to
         | people, we have to think of corporations.
        
         | scubbo wrote:
         | > Corporate personhood mostly just means that for some
         | purposes, the same laws apply to corporations as to people.
         | 
         | In my experience, almost no-one is truly upset about the
         | "corporations are people" idea in isolation. The upset stems
         | from the combination of "corporations are people", "people have
         | a right to free speech", and "political donations are speech",
         | which in effect meant "corporations can make unlimited
         | political donations". If there was a system that categorized
         | political donations as a form of speech that could be limited,
         | 95% of the issue would go away.
        
       | dcminter wrote:
       | I rather enjoyed this, although I had assumed from the title that
       | it was going to be "things" like the Internet Assigned Numbers
       | Authority that at one time was Jon Postel (a person). Any other
       | examples of that ilk...?
        
       | golemotron wrote:
       | Great article but disappointed that the monkey with the camera
       | did not make an appearance.
        
       | johnnyApplePRNG wrote:
       | I'm smiling already. Excellent read. This writer has SKILLS!
        
       | throwuxiytayq wrote:
       | Wow, the OO inheritance model really _was_ a mistake.
        
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