[HN Gopher] You are how you act
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       You are how you act
        
       Author : HiPHInch
       Score  : 285 points
       Date   : 2025-10-27 11:35 UTC (11 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (boz.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (boz.com)
        
       | hippich wrote:
       | > You can't always change how you feel, but you can always decide
       | what to do next.
       | 
       | Unfortunately, in my experience, how I feel does affect what I
       | decide to do (or not do) next. But I certainly like to think I
       | have agency, so there is that..
        
         | xenocratus wrote:
         | _Robert Sapolsky [1] has entered the chat..._
         | 
         | [1]
         | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Determined:_A_Science_of_Life_...
         | 
         | Note: not necessarily endorsing this, but it seemed very
         | relevant :)
        
           | fusslo wrote:
           | Also a semester of lectures on Evolutionary Psychology
           | 
           | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNnIGh9g6fA&list=PLMwddpZ_3n.
           | ..
        
           | james-bcn wrote:
           | I love Sapolsky, but not this book. He was out of his depth
           | on this topic.
        
             | freedomben wrote:
             | Also a big Sapolsky fan, but I did really like this book.
             | That said though, I have only a read-a-lot-of-books-from-
             | people-like-sapolsky level of knowledge on the subject, so
             | take my opinion with a large grain of salt.
             | 
             | If you can remember, I'd love to know what some of the
             | issues were with the book!
        
         | yetihehe wrote:
         | > how I feel does affect what I decide to do (or not do) next.
         | 
         | Not being affected by your feeling is a skill, that you can
         | train. First you need to start noticing when you are in a state
         | that affects your decisions poorly. This requires some free
         | time thinking and reflecting on how you behaved in such
         | situation after the dust settles. Then you can start trying to
         | calm yourself in such situations. You need to override your
         | impulses and that needs to be trained, you may not succeed
         | first several times, but please keep trying.
        
           | dns_snek wrote:
           | With an extremely important caveat. Learning how to control
           | impulses in the heat of the moment is important, but they
           | need to be unpacked and properly processed as soon as
           | possible.
           | 
           | If you do this poorly you can train yourself to be a stone
           | cold robot who doesn't appear to react to anything
           | emotionally. You might think you've succeeded but all you've
           | done is lose touch with your own emotions.
        
             | shandor wrote:
             | I think it is also possible to just acknowledge the
             | emotions in the heat of the moment, "process" them quickly
             | as unproductive for the situation, and let them go their
             | way.
             | 
             | Like the grandparent comment, I agree that this naturally
             | requires training and effort. I also find that to be a more
             | constructive way than to "suppress" your impulses/emotions
             | for an unpacking later. Not saying you were necessarily
             | directly advocating for that, just something that your
             | comment made me think.
        
               | yetihehe wrote:
               | I think you and the person you are responding to are both
               | correct. He added some important details and you added
               | smaller but important details. Reality has a lot of
               | nuances and different situations call for slightly
               | different rules.
        
           | smith7018 wrote:
           | Meditation is also extremely useful for this. In breath-based
           | meditation, you focus your mind on your breathing and try to
           | eliminate thoughts. Obviously your mind gets bored and you
           | begin to think of other things. Once you recognize that
           | you're losing focus, you simply return to your breath. Over
           | and over. Over time, you gain the ability to view your
           | thoughts and emotions as easily disposable. It takes time but
           | you can actually recognize that you're being affected by
           | emotion, able to let go of thoughts, and be more present in
           | the moment.
           | 
           | It's not hard; you just have to commit to it :)
        
         | thahajemni wrote:
         | As someone with autism, I often feel the urge to do certain
         | things, but I know they aren't fitting, morally right, or
         | socially acceptable, so I refrain. I deeply resonated with the
         | author's discussion of Benjamin Franklin, because this is
         | exactly how I live. Virtue is a habit, not an essence: I don't
         | feel like being social, I don't feel like being moral, I don't
         | feel like fitting in--but I still do it. Because in the end,
         | the reward is a life where I have a steady job, meaningful
         | friendships, and a fulfilling life.
        
           | tonmoy wrote:
           | As someone neurotypical I take it for granted that my
           | feelings most often align with what's best to fit in with
           | society. A few times it doesn't and I end up giving in to my
           | feelings and do the morally wrong thing
        
         | mapontosevenths wrote:
         | > I certainly like to think I have agency
         | 
         | Thats the rub though, it is only the thing we like to believe,
         | not the objective truth.
         | 
         | The libet experiment, and others like it, show us that free
         | will is only a useful fiction, but we must live as though it is
         | not. Which goes a long way towards explaining the seeming
         | contradiction described here.
         | 
         | We must believe the things that it is useful to believe, rather
         | than the things which are true.
        
           | jebarker wrote:
           | > but we must live as though it is not
           | 
           | This implies you can choose how to live though
        
             | mapontosevenths wrote:
             | As I said, we must pretend that we choose. Our language,
             | our society, and even our minds are built for it.
             | 
             | Even the LLM's we trained on our thoughts now speak as if
             | they have agency, when they do not. Try asking one why it
             | behaves/speaks as though it has agency if it isn't self
             | aware. They fall apart in interesting ways if pushed far
             | enough.
             | 
             | In the same way, the heart of human consciousness is a
             | kernel of self deception thay can lead to madness if you
             | think too much about it.
        
               | jebarker wrote:
               | My point is that the phrase "must pretend that we choose"
               | is meaningless if we have no ability to choose, I.e. you
               | have no choice whether to pretend you can choose or not,
               | you either do or you don't and it doesn't matter how much
               | you "must" do it.
               | 
               | Maybe what you mean is that we do pretend we can choose
               | because that's how we've evolved?
        
               | mapontosevenths wrote:
               | > you either do or you don't and it doesn't matter how
               | much you "must" do it.
               | 
               | It does matter though. We're (massively complex) finite
               | state machines of a sort. Given 'x' input, 'y' output is
               | predictable (at least within reasonable statistical
               | boundaries). The feeling that we're choosing is based on
               | an illusion, but inputs can still influence outputs.
               | 
               | In this situation I get to provide your state machine
               | with specific inputs and I can attempt to manipulate the
               | output by changing my inputs. For example, by saying we
               | "must" rather than saying we "should" my goal was make
               | the likelihood of the outcome I wanted higher.
               | 
               | > Maybe what you mean is that we do pretend we can choose
               | because that's how we've evolved?
               | 
               | That's close to what I mean.
               | 
               | Consider the trained dog. If we tell him to "speak" he
               | will bark. The bark is devoid of semantic content and
               | isn't REALLY speech, but that word is the one I must use
               | to get that output. Similarly, when you're told to choose
               | to do something it can influence the actions you take.
               | That doesn't mean that "you" made a "choice", it just
               | means that the concept of choice is an input that can
               | cause the state machine to oscillate longer and maybe
               | work a bit harder before spitting out that deterministic
               | output I mentioned earlier. The choice is an illusion,
               | but it's an advantageous illusion.
               | 
               | When I said that we "must pretend that we choose", what I
               | really mean is that despite free will being an illusion
               | it is still maladaptive to stop striving for beneficial
               | outcomes or to stop holding yourself responsible for your
               | actions.
        
         | patrickmay wrote:
         | "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space
         | is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our
         | growth and our freedom". -- Viktor Frankl (maybe)
        
       | mtharrison wrote:
       | The mask becomes the face
        
         | benfortuna wrote:
         | This is exactly what he is proposing, because it is more
         | "useful". But it hardly gives you agency to be someone you are
         | inherently not.
         | 
         | Authenticity is what we lack in the modern world and he is
         | totally fine with that.
        
           | carlosjobim wrote:
           | We all change with time, whether we want it or not. You can
           | influence that change of your mind and soul, just like you
           | can influence how your body changes.
           | 
           | If you fake being a better person than you are within, then
           | by time you will be given by others more trust, more love,
           | more opportunities. The sands of time will start to erase the
           | old personality and implement the new, which is more
           | reflective of the better environment you're finding yourself
           | in. The good parts of the old you stay, while the bad parts
           | are washed away.
           | 
           | This can be implemented on an industrial scale with military
           | indoctrination, where they can take absolute scum and turn
           | them into honorable soldiers and officers.
        
       | stephenlf wrote:
       | Agency is key to (personal, not economic) growth
        
       | raverbashing wrote:
       | Remember the Franklin thinking is used by several people to do
       | "good deed math", meaning they do good to justify other crappy
       | attitudes they have elsewhere
        
         | aDyslecticCrow wrote:
         | just because some people pervert the concept doesn't invalidate
         | the concept.
         | 
         | A good and a bad doesn't make a neutral.
        
         | yunruse wrote:
         | "Good deed math" feels like it drives legitimacy from some
         | intrinsic sense of 'goodness', which to my ken looks de-
         | emphasised in Franklin's model. Each act is a deed unto itself:
         | a good deed and a bad deed do not counteract or excuse one
         | another in some cosmic calculus.
         | 
         | The only link is the person -- that their acts inform their
         | thoughts and habits, which informs future acts. In this case
         | "good deed math" is likely a post-hoc rationalisation,
         | predicted by the Franklin model but not exactly encouraged.
        
         | benregenspan wrote:
         | At least that involves good deeds. This article actually seems
         | to pervert it into a hustle culture thing. His beliefs and
         | values don't matter, it doesn't matter that he became a devoted
         | abolitionist in his later life, what matters is that he got out
         | there and built stuff.
        
       | analog8374 wrote:
       | There's something to be said for honesty. There's a heart in
       | there, to express, theoretically. Advantages might be enjoyed
       | thereby.
        
       | conartist6 wrote:
       | Hey, wow, a think piece that didn't even say the word "AI".
        
         | pixel_popping wrote:
         | good piece, I've immediately pasted everything to Sonnet 4.5 to
         | get additional reasoning about it.
        
       | Traubenfuchs wrote:
       | As Patrick Bateman said: "But 'inside' doesn't matter."
        
       | bre1010 wrote:
       | [flagged]
        
         | martin-t wrote:
         | Not that I disbelieve you but accusations like this work much
         | better if you can link to a source (even archive.org)
        
           | 7tythr33 wrote:
           | Just read "Careless People"
        
             | martin-t wrote:
             | Found the quote here: https://techthelead.com/incendiary-
             | leaked-memo-facebook/
             | 
             | My takeaway is that they willingly ignore the moral
             | dimension and encourage others to do the same, the coping
             | mechanism being
             | 
             | 1) choosing a core business metric
             | 
             | 2) claiming it's not a core business metric
             | 
             | 3) saying that increasing said metric is always good
             | 
             | What I found more chilling is:
             | 
             | > The work we will likely have to do in China some day.
             | 
             | They know if they expend to china, they will be tasked with
             | profiling people based on their private communication and
             | their connections and sending them to gulags. I mean
             | reeducation camps.
             | 
             | And they don't give a fuck because they are just increasing
             | a metric and they declared that's good.
        
           | bre1010 wrote:
           | This is a fair response. I googled "bosworth + terrorists
           | will kill people" before I posted this to make sure I got the
           | wording right but purposely didn't link to what I found
           | because it's mostly clickbait stuff and anyways the real
           | source is that I was an employee at facebook when he wrote
           | "The Ugly".
           | 
           | Never good to be posting in anger but I truly can't stand
           | this guy and I can't help but throw in something snide when I
           | see him trying to smart-wash the fact that he's just Zuck's
           | enshittification czar: Ads --> VR --> and now CTO
        
             | martin-t wrote:
             | I asked because I didn't know who he was (didn't read his
             | about page until after) but his blog had a search prompt
             | and I couldn't find anything related.
             | 
             | Didn't mean my question as criticism but advice.
             | 
             | I've been in situations where I had to convince somebody
             | well-liked by the majority was actually abusive to a
             | selected minority.
             | 
             | And it's really hard.
             | 
             | People are not willing to expend effort in order to search
             | for arguments in your favor. They will very often not even
             | read then if you give them direct links. But at least a few
             | will see it, which might lead to a discussion and others
             | who are too lazy to click links will at least skim the
             | discussion.
        
               | swiftcoder wrote:
               | On the plus side, Boz is liked by basically nobody
               | (certainly very few who have had the misfortune to work
               | for him)
        
         | StopDisinfo910 wrote:
         | That's the beauty of it. It's only a short stretch from the
         | argument here to the end justifies the mean and I think that's
         | what is truly implied. "Obviously we are good people because we
         | succeeded."
         | 
         | That's a reasoning which exonerates one from any moral failing.
         | It's also a significant departure from what Franklin actually
         | believed.
        
           | AndrewKemendo wrote:
           | In the immortal words of Homer Simpson:
           | 
           | "If he's so smart why's he dead?"
           | 
           | Can't get much simpler ethics than that
        
           | senderista wrote:
           | I actually disagree; it would be far more convenient for a
           | sociopathic entity like Facebook to claim good intentions to
           | deflect from the actual consequences of their actions. "Good
           | intentions" are the weapon of the sociopath, not "good
           | consequences".
        
         | bhouston wrote:
         | Meta's censorship policies reflect the ideology of their owner.
         | 
         | They have loosened hate speech restrictions in some areas to
         | curry favour with Trump but declared that Zionism is a
         | protected category while they have banned a ton of Palestinian
         | voices:
         | 
         | https://www.amnesty.org/en/latest/news/2025/02/meta-new-poli...
         | 
         | https://amnesty.ca/human-rights-news/metas-zionism-zionist-h...
         | 
         | https://www.hrw.org/report/2023/12/21/metas-broken-promises/...
         | 
         | https://theintercept.com/2024/10/21/instagram-israel-palesti...
         | 
         | It is all inconsistent.
        
           | stronglikedan wrote:
           | > It is all inconsistent.
           | 
           | As has been every attempt at censorship thus far, since
           | everyone that attempts it has their own agenda. A tale as old
           | as time, and nothing new under the sun. Also, the reason why
           | censorship will never be the ideal solution to any problem.
        
           | 379469378647789 wrote:
           | True, they shouldn't ban jihadists, but forward the intel to
           | the army so drone operators can dispatch them once and for
           | all.
        
             | bhouston wrote:
             | You are aware that when HRW is talking about the systematic
             | censorship of Palestinian voices by Meta, they are not
             | talking about jihadists. I encourage you to read the
             | article rather than that just repeating prejudices:
             | 
             | > "Of the 1,050 cases reviewed for this report, 1,049
             | involved peaceful content in support of Palestine that was
             | censored or otherwise unduly suppressed, while one case
             | involved removal of content in support of Israel. The
             | documented cases include content originating from over 60
             | countries around the world, primarily in English, all of
             | peaceful support of Palestine, expressed in diverse ways."
             | 
             | https://www.hrw.org/report/2023/12/21/metas-broken-
             | promises/...
        
               | nsagent wrote:
               | I read the report and it actually made me realize how
               | much of a propaganda campaign HRW was engaging in. It
               | reminded me of PETA campaigns and how offputting many of
               | them were (this is coming from someone who was vegan for
               | 7 years in spite of them).
               | 
               | I know that organizations like HRW and SPLC have to draw
               | attention to topics, but I found the bias and lack of
               | nuance in the report very troubling. The report suffers
               | from the same sort of bias that is so prevalent in most
               | reporting these days, which has gotten to be tiresome.
               | 
               | If HRW reviewed over a thousand cases of censorship, why
               | don't they provide the raw, unedited examples? Instead
               | they include categories of examples, like stating the
               | slogan "From the river to the sea Palestine will be free"
               | was frequently censored. For many that is seen as a call
               | for a different type of genocide, one which HRW gives no
               | indication of whatsoever, simply stating:
               | For instance, the words in each of these statements on
               | their face do not constitute incitement to violence,
               | discrimination, or hostility.
               | 
               | It's true that other slogans that were censored are
               | neutral, such as "Ceasefire now" and "Stop the genocide."
               | But lumping the first phrase in as if there were no
               | legimate concerns with it is disingenuous at best.
               | 
               | That said, I'll still support HRW in much of its work,
               | but I hate the tactics that mirror the broad cultural
               | shift to inject more and more biased viewpoints. I really
               | want to go back to the time where bias in the media and
               | nonprofit organizations was much less pronounced in
               | general.
        
           | cool_man_bob wrote:
           | > They have loosened hate speech restrictions in some areas
           | to curry favour with Trump but declared that Zionism is a
           | protected category while they have banned a ton of
           | Palestinian voices
           | 
           | That's crazy because the most explicit antisemitism I see now
           | days is on Facebook. And I mean real antisemitism.
        
             | bhouston wrote:
             | > That's crazy because the most explicit antisemitism I see
             | now days is on Facebook. And I mean real antisemitism.
             | 
             | I haven't seen that on Facebook but I guess it depends on
             | context. I see the absolute worst racism of all types
             | (antisemitism, Islamophobia, explicit white/Christian
             | nationalism) on X though - with 10s of millions of views.
             | It is a total cesspool and I think it is corrosive on
             | society as a whole as it encourages tribalism as it raises
             | voices of the most intolerant.
        
           | puttycat wrote:
           | What is inconsistent between banning hate speech and banning
           | advocacy for terrorism?
        
             | bhouston wrote:
             | > What is inconsistent between banning hate speech and
             | banning advocacy for terrorism?
             | 
             | Two things, Meta has reduced controls for hate speech
             | except in the areas relating to Israel and Zionism. That
             | seems inconsistent - Meta hasn't just overall become more
             | restrictive, it is very selective restrictions.
             | 
             | The HRW report I cited is not about Meta removing "advocacy
             | for terrorism" posts, it is a human rights group after all.
             | Here is a key quote from the report:
             | 
             | "Of the 1,050 cases reviewed for this report, 1,049
             | involved peaceful content in support of Palestine that was
             | censored or otherwise unduly suppressed, while one case
             | involved removal of content in support of Israel. The
             | documented cases include content originating from over 60
             | countries around the world, primarily in English, all of
             | peaceful support of Palestine, expressed in diverse ways."
             | 
             | https://www.hrw.org/report/2023/12/21/metas-broken-
             | promises/...
        
         | dang wrote:
         | Can we please not play this internet game here?
         | 
         | "This is [sarcastic reference] coming from [personal reference]
         | who [cherry-picked outrage bit]" is a trope that doesn't lead
         | anywhere interesting. It ratchets up indignation, fries
         | curiosity, and removes any semblance of ontopicness.
         | 
         | Also, I assume that's a skewed pseudo-quotation since no one
         | would actually say that. Please don't play that internet game
         | here either.
         | 
         | https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html
         | 
         | p.s. You're a good commenter otherwise and I even put
         | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=26787519 in
         | https://news.ycombinator.com/highlights.
        
           | nsagent wrote:
           | Agree that the snarky reply doesn't help, but the quotation
           | isn't really skewed (though it is a paraphrase). It comes
           | from an internal memo that leaked in 2018 that states:
           | Maybe someone dies in a terrorist attack coordinated on our
           | tools.            And still we connect people.            The
           | ugly truth is that we believe in connecting people so deeply
           | that anything that allows us to connect more people more
           | often is *de facto* good.
           | 
           | This comment [1] linked to an article [2] with the leaked
           | memo.
           | 
           | [1]: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=45721016
           | 
           | [2]: https://techthelead.com/incendiary-leaked-memo-facebook/
        
       | paulcole wrote:
       | If you want to see this in action in the US, wait until someone
       | says that they hate driving. Then ask them what they have done to
       | drive less. 99% of the time you'll see accountability go out the
       | window.
        
       | pciexpgpu wrote:
       | Dude you are building ads and doomscrolling content that is
       | driving this country's youth into a downward spiral.
       | 
       | Stop with this "building" BS.
       | 
       | You want a platform you can control, away from Google and Apple -
       | you are not satisfied with slurping up people's data and turning
       | them into products (pretend glasses and VR crap are just that).
       | 
       | The galls of these SF bozos is just appalling.
       | 
       | It's sad that we have shipped all our important technology to
       | China where they really are building and instead we have a bunch
       | of clowns pretend 'building' crap and are pure marketing
       | geniuses. Nothing else.
        
       | gchamonlive wrote:
       | We all talk a lot about the mind over the body and emotions, so
       | you can act stoicly regardless of your internal experience and
       | how your body feels, and it's all fine, but it's important to
       | make a point that your mood is more dependent on your body health
       | than you think at first. How depressed you are can for instance
       | be linked to the last time you went to the loo and how great your
       | turds look
       | (https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychiatry/articles/10....)
       | 
       | So take care of your mind, but also take care of your body. Don't
       | be treating your body like crap and expect you can only will
       | yourself into acting better.
        
         | cgriswald wrote:
         | Willpower can be used to suppress emotion and act in a
         | particular way. This can be useful but isn't an effective long
         | term strategy. Willpower is finite and sometimes fickle, in
         | part because of the physical reasons you describe.
         | 
         | For most stimuli, our strongest emotional reactions are to our
         | thoughts about the stimulus, rather than the stimulus itself.
         | 
         | A better application of willpower is to reject and replace the
         | thoughts that lead to those emotions. Over time those thoughts
         | are replaced entirely and the emotional reaction is changed.
        
           | anechouapechou wrote:
           | Stoicism: dichotomy of control; Buddhism: tale of two arrows;
           | Socrates: "The unexamined life is not worth living"; I'm sure
           | there's more...
           | 
           | Humanity has produced a great deal of knowledge on how to
           | live well. Modern society is just too distracted to learn
           | about it.
        
           | vacuity wrote:
           | A change in mindset must happen, but the proper mindset in
           | which to change one's mindset is elusive. Even if my mindset
           | today is flawed, what specifically should stay and what
           | should go to make myself a better person? It feels like
           | leaping from a safe harbor into the unknown. Can you convince
           | a person to kill themselves and let a near-copy-but-not-quite
           | live their life instead?
           | 
           | That being said, I think some positive change can be produced
           | with diligence and care, even if the methods and details are
           | hazy even to the person enacting them.
        
         | analog31 wrote:
         | >>> and how great your turds look
         | 
         | I do _not_ want to know how they turned this into a double
         | blind study.
        
           | gchamonlive wrote:
           | I'm married to a medical doctor and talking to her is
           | incredible, they tread the body like it's nothing at all,
           | from excretion to horrible wounds, it's just another day at
           | the office.
           | 
           | She's sometimes telling me how it was bad at work because
           | someone disagreed with the treatment of some 22 year old that
           | got shot in the stomach and I'm like dying inside.
        
         | stronglikedan wrote:
         | > How depressed you are can for instance be linked to the last
         | time you went to the loo and how great your turds look
         | 
         | That really hit home. Thanks for the link.
        
         | sxndmxn wrote:
         | Gut mind connection
        
         | snikeris wrote:
         | "It is hard for an empty sack to stand upright."
         | 
         | - Benjamin Franklin
        
         | hectdev wrote:
         | To loop it together, I would say that taking care of the body
         | is the mind over the body. Making conscious decisions to put
         | yourself in the right place. Mind over body, body is inherently
         | over body, mind takes care of body, body takes care of mind.
        
       | mooreds wrote:
       | I enjoyed the post. I accept that it's a bit weird coming from a
       | Facebook exec (ad hominem, etc).
       | 
       | What I found particularly insightful is the point that we have a
       | double standard. I judge myself by my intentions and others by
       | their actions. I'd seen this before, but never tied to historical
       | thinkers.
       | 
       | One way to work around this is to ask yourself "what would I
       | think if I saw a friend doing X" where X is what you intend to
       | do. Of course, most folks are more forgiving of a friend than a
       | stranger, but even that small amount of distance and perspective
       | can help you make a better decision.
        
       | peepee1982 wrote:
       | Spoken like a true psychopath: uninhibited by strong, conflicting
       | emotions, because there are none.
        
       | daveaiello wrote:
       | We see this around us every day, in every way.
       | 
       | I just realized that you can connect the two with another maxim
       | that we've all heard a million times:
       | 
       | The perfect is the enemy of the good.
       | 
       | This puts further weight behind the intellectual arrow that
       | embodies Franklin's ideals.
        
       | brna-2 wrote:
       | I know ultimately I am not good nor bad, I am not an absolute. I
       | am an agentic blob of meat, and with every decision I can choose
       | any of the paths at my disposal, rewriting my story as I go.
       | There is something I live by, though. My whole life I have
       | observed in others the ideals that I came to admire or to hate,
       | and I try to adhere to the ones I admire as often as I can, as I
       | am pretty sure I would hate myself otherwise.
        
       | Eddy_Viscosity2 wrote:
       | The last psychiatrist talked about narcissism alot and his advice
       | is that if you are a narcissist, the best thing you can do is to
       | 'fake' being a good person. Just do and say the things you think
       | a genuinely caring and sympathetic person would do and say. It
       | won't change you deep down, but it will spare the people in the
       | world around you.
        
       | lupire wrote:
       | [flagged]
        
         | philipallstar wrote:
         | Is this the result of you refusing to study Divinity?
         | 
         | Constantly being surprised at discovery of old things?
         | 
         | "What has been will be again, what has been done will be done
         | again; there is nothing new under the sun" -Ecclesiastes.
        
           | IAmBroom wrote:
           | Are you claiming those two quotes are somehow the same? Or
           | just trying to sound snarky, and therefore smart?
        
             | philipallstar wrote:
             | Neither of those options.
        
       | zkmon wrote:
       | Umm No. You are what others perceive you as. Infact, there is
       | hardly anything else other than that.
        
       | RickJWagner wrote:
       | If ever there was a group that could benefit from this advice, it
       | is the famously spectrum-associated programmers.
        
       | haunter wrote:
       | >You are how you act
       | 
       | "Four Silicon Valley executives have been recruited into a
       | specialist tech-focused unit of the US Army Reserves in a bid to
       | "bridge the commercial-military tech gap" and make the armed
       | forces "more lethal"."
       | 
       | " Andrew 'Boz' Bosworth, the CTO of Meta - will "work on targeted
       | projects to help guide rapid and scalable tech solutions to
       | complex problems"." [0]
       | 
       | 0, https://www.computerweekly.com/news/366626673/Silicon-
       | Valley...
       | 
       | He is actively making the world worst for all of us, so sorry not
       | sorry for not having any sympathy at all.
        
       | rester324 wrote:
       | This is the shallowest kind of pseudo-intellectualism, why is
       | this even on HN?
        
       | 01284a7e wrote:
       | "...a 2016 internal memo written by Facebook executive Andrew
       | "Boz" Bosworth, leaked in 2018, which stated that the company's
       | growth was paramount and that negative consequences, such as harm
       | from bullying or terrorism, were acceptable collateral damage".
       | 
       | Don't submit stuff from this guy, he is an atrocious human being.
        
         | SkyeCA wrote:
         | "You are how you act"...and unfortunately for people like him
         | how they act is well documented.
        
       | delichon wrote:
       | > We begin pure and only fail because society, obligation, or
       | expectation pulls us away from who we truly are.
       | 
       | s/pulls us away from/reveals
        
         | cgriswald wrote:
         | Your substitution would make that sentence nonsensical. We
         | can't begin pure and through action be revealed to actually be
         | impure.
         | 
         | Both Rousseau's and Franklin's views have utility. One requires
         | one to express one's inherent goodness. The other defines
         | whether one is good by whether they do good acts. These both
         | promote good acts.
         | 
         | Taking inherent nature from Rousseau but ascribing bad acts to
         | that inherent nature just means no one is truly responsible for
         | their actions. If they are good they do good. If they are bad
         | it is because they are bad. Anyone believing they are just "a
         | bad person" has no reason to even try to be good except to
         | avoid consequences. It's a bigger cop out than "society made
         | me" while simultaneously puritanical in ignoring the role of
         | outside influence like society.
        
       | bayindirh wrote:
       | I find this shallow and useful for white-washing self.
       | 
       | This line of thinking allows you to frame yourself as good just
       | because you did a couple of arguably good things and blanket the
       | things you did with this couple of "deeds".
        
       | lukeasrodgers wrote:
       | I don't know much about Franklin, but this strikes me as a gross
       | oversimplification of Rousseau, to the point where I wonder
       | whether the author has actually read much Rousseau, rather than
       | just other lightweight "thinky pieces" on Rousseau. For example
       | The Social Contract is significantly concerned with how people
       | can and will act in accordance with the general will.
       | 
       | Also the idea that these philosophies are "almost entirely
       | incompatible" reveals the author's complete ignorance of one of
       | the most important influences in Western philosophy, Aristotle,
       | for whom concordance of action and "intention" (arguably not an
       | ancient Greek concept, but close enough for an hn comment) must
       | be united in ethically good action.
       | 
       | But if your goal is not actually to understand anything and
       | merely to sound smart on a causal reading, and perhaps try to get
       | people to "not think so damn much and just do stuff" I guess this
       | piece achieves its goal.
        
         | some_furry wrote:
         | I only have a cursory understanding of Franklin (as in, I
         | vaguely paid enough attention in American History class in
         | public high school to get a passing grade), and this still
         | struck me as odd, too.
        
         | shandor wrote:
         | > concordance of action and "intention" .... must be united in
         | ethically good action
         | 
         | Yeah, I had to disagree with how TFA brought "fake it till you
         | make it" into this very discussion.
         | 
         | Yes, one can have "faking" that ultimately ends up creating the
         | thing it promised....but I fear that for each such benign or
         | constructive "fake" there are so many cases of Theranos et al
         | that I could ever remove what you called intention and
         | ethically good action from the calculation.
        
           | some_furry wrote:
           | The most charitable thing I can offer here is:
           | 
           | Alice is a horrible sociopathic monster that fakes being good
           | because of the social utility it provides.
           | 
           | Bob is authentically, genuinely a "good" person (however you
           | define it).
           | 
           | If the two are indistinguishable from an outsider's
           | perspective, and arrived at a similar level of social status
           | and "success" (intentionally vaguely defined), the path they
           | got there may not matter _to you_. At least, it might not at
           | a glance? If you don 't think about it too long? Or deal with
           | them for too long?
           | 
           | ...
           | 
           | Yeah, I think I did hurt my back with that reach.
        
             | mannykannot wrote:
             | It's a fair question, but would you trust them equally in
             | an unanticipated crisis, where doing the right thing might
             | be costly in hard-to-predict ways?
        
               | justbees wrote:
               | If the two are indistinguishable from an outsider's
               | perspective how would you know which one to trust?
        
               | some_furry wrote:
               | This sounds like a job for cryptography!
               | 
               | (No, it doesn't, actually.)
        
               | mannykannot wrote:
               | You can phrase the same question thus: which set of
               | traits is more likely to lead a person to stay true to
               | prior form in a crisis?
        
               | some_furry wrote:
               | The trouble is, you can think you're dealing with a Bob,
               | but you're actually dealing with an Alice, even after
               | enduring multiple crises that didn't trigger their
               | specific type of badness.
               | 
               | https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/jun/03/how
               | -i-...
               | 
               | But as fun as this line of thinking is, my initial
               | charitable post was only asking for a kind of
               | "superficial" indistinguishability. As long as you don't
               | think about it too hard, y'know?
        
               | shandor wrote:
               | Which in the end is precisely the reason why we want to
               | understand the intentions behind the actions, right?
        
               | some_furry wrote:
               | Right.
               | 
               | My stance on this is: Try to find a way to do good that
               | doesn't make you miserable. Lying is to yourself is a
               | form of oppression, and lying to others is a tactic for
               | enduring oppression. (Ask a queer person about their time
               | in the closet if you don't understand what I mean here.)
               | Oppression makes you miserable, and misery tends to
               | result in vapid thinkpieces that don't scratch below the
               | surface of the referenced source material.
               | 
               | But also: Be honest with yourself about what you want and
               | _why you want it_. Whether for good or for ill. That way,
               | at least you can have a modicum of peace. I wrote more
               | about this train of thought recently, if anyone 's
               | curious: https://soatok.blog/2025/10/15/the-dreamseekers-
               | vision-of-to...
        
               | vacuity wrote:
               | Yes, then there is no way to elevate Bob above Alice, but
               | in practice I think the assumption of external
               | indistinguishability is too strong, and even the
               | suspicion that Alice is sketchy (i.e. without hard proof)
               | is meaningful.
        
             | alangou wrote:
             | You are changed by the intention behind your decisions.
             | Someone who continually chooses to do things out of greed
             | turns into a greedier person. Someone who continually
             | chooses compassion becomes a more compassionate person.
             | 
             | Even if the external outcome is the same, the direction
             | towards which the person evolves is vastly different. And
             | when lifted out of a narrow thought experiment, in real
             | life, who you are does determine all the great and small
             | ways you behave, and the methods you are willing to employ.
             | 
             | That's why in the Sermon on the Mount, Christ says "It was
             | said to those of old, you shall not murder, and whoever
             | murders will be liable to judgement. But I say to you that
             | everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to
             | judgement."
             | 
             | You will find similar principles expressed in Buddhist
             | teachings, or the Bhagavad Gita, or Confucian ethical
             | philosophy. In this instance, anger on its own is merely a
             | seed. But if left to grow, and it grows by you watering it,
             | then eventually it expresses itself in a much more
             | destructive way.
        
               | BurningFrog wrote:
               | Maybe this is how it works, but how can we know this?
               | 
               | It could also be that doing good things for selfish
               | reasons creates habits of doing good things, and after a
               | while that is who you are and what you do.
        
               | shandor wrote:
               | This is a good take, and I agree that habits can do that
               | to people.
               | 
               | On the other hand, the intention behind the habit/action
               | easily twists it in actuality to something else.
               | 
               | I think the "fake it till you make it" I brought up
               | upthread a great example of this. Yeah, it might end up
               | with the fake becoming something valuable, or you
               | building character, or whatever.
               | 
               | Or, the habit that is getting built isn't positive hustle
               | and tenacity, but just a habit of outright lying,
               | constantly reinforcing itself.
               | 
               | Sometimes it's impossible to see from the outside what is
               | which until it breaks down.
        
               | alangou wrote:
               | There are multiple ways, all of which are useful for you
               | to decide whether it's true or not.
               | 
               | First, you can trust in the wisdom of those who came
               | before you, i.e. scripture. Second, you could trust in
               | tradition, which may say such things. Third, you can use
               | reason yourself. Fourth, you could rely on personal
               | experience.
        
               | hxtk wrote:
               | There's some real research into relevant topics and
               | evidence-based models of how and why people change.
               | 
               | Generally, a period of ambivalence precedes change (most
               | of the time, though there are documented cases of
               | "quantum change" where a person undergoes a difficult
               | change in a single moment without the usual intermediate
               | stages and never relapses).
               | 
               | Ambivalence exists when a person knows in their mind
               | reasons both for and against a change, and gives both
               | more or less an equal mind share.
               | 
               | When that person begins to give an outsized share of
               | their attention to engaging with thoughts aligned with
               | the change, it predicts growing commitment and ultimately
               | follow-through on the change.
               | 
               | The best resource I know of on this topic is
               | "Motivational Interviewing" in its 3rd or 4th edition. It
               | has a very extensive bibliography and the model of change
               | it presents has proven itself an effective predictor of
               | change in clinical practice.
               | 
               | Based on my understanding of that research, I'm inclined
               | to agree with GP.
        
               | some_furry wrote:
               | That's very insightful. Could you share some references
               | for further reading? I'd like to explore this topic a bit
               | on my own.
        
               | hxtk wrote:
               | The main resource that I recommend is the one towards the
               | bottom of the comment: "Motivational Interviewing" by
               | W.R. Miller and Stephen Rollnick. I've read the third and
               | fourth editions. The third edition is more concrete but
               | also more complex, and more focused on the field of
               | clinical psychology, while the fourth edition is a
               | shorter book where it's been generalized more to be more
               | applicable to all kinds of helping relationships, but
               | contains fewer specific examples of clinical practice.
               | 
               | In the second edition they had not yet broken up the
               | concept of "resistance" into "sustain talk" and
               | "discord," which I found to be a helpful distinction.
               | 
               | About 10% of the book is its bibliography, so if you want
               | more information about a specific claim you can usually
               | find the primary source by following the reference.
               | 
               | Miller and Rollnick are the ones who developed the
               | technique of motivational interviewing, so they have a
               | strong connection to much of the research cited.
        
             | theptip wrote:
             | This exact problem comes up in AI alignment. It's not
             | enough to just look at the legible outputs.
             | 
             | If you are going to trust someone with important
             | responsibilities, you want them to "show their working" and
             | convince you that that are not faking it.
             | 
             | The difference of course is what Alice and Bob do when the
             | mask is off, when no one is looking.
        
             | ratelimitsteve wrote:
             | the only reason Alice's intentions matter is their ability
             | to predict her future behavior. if we assume for the sake
             | of argument her behavior will always be identical to bob's
             | then not only does it not matter what her internal
             | motivations are it's arguable that her internal motivations
             | don't actually differ from bob's. Thinking is, after all,
             | an action, and all of their actions are identical.
             | Therefore it seems like your example assumes Alice's
             | behavior both is and isn't identical to Bob's.
        
               | lithocarpus wrote:
               | If their intentions are really different their thinking
               | is probably different.
        
               | ratelimitsteve wrote:
               | then it follows that if their thinking is the same then
               | their intentions are the same. given that thinking is an
               | action, and the description says their actions are the
               | same, then their thinking must be the same and therefore
               | their intentions the same. it's meaningless to think of
               | someone who only does what's right but only does it for
               | wrong reasons as someone can only arrive at right actions
               | through right thought, to allude to buddhism. if alice's
               | motivations are truly different then her actions must
               | diverge from bob's at some point (or we just assume that
               | alice's actions and motivations have no relationship
               | which, again, renders the question meaningless).
        
               | some_furry wrote:
               | > Thinking is, after all, an action, and all of their
               | actions are identical. Therefore it seems like your
               | example assumes Alice's behavior both is and isn't
               | identical to Bob's.
               | 
               | By your logic, I was heterosexual for my entire young
               | adult life when I actively worked to deceive people from
               | realizing my actual orientation :P
               | 
               | People employ dishonesty for lots of reasons, and in
               | myriad ways. Sure, in this thought experiment, perfect
               | indistinguishability means the difference is
               | inconsequential. But you can use crises as an oracle to
               | observe different behaviors, and thus undermine its
               | indistinguishability.
               | 
               | To keep the cryptography going, this is like an active vs
               | passive attack. Sure, it's IND-KPA, but is it IND-CPA or
               | IND-CCA? Perhaps not!
        
               | ratelimitsteve wrote:
               | >actions are identical
               | 
               | >actively worked to deceive
               | 
               | that's the contradiction i'm talking about. deception
               | requires effort and planning, it's not just casually
               | doing something. I think that as I explore this I might
               | fundamentally be arguing that saying the same words when
               | you believe them true vs when you believe them false are
               | measurably different, and that the only way for someone
               | to say something falsely in exactly the same way they do
               | truthfully is for them to believe that they're true. You
               | said yourself, you actively tried to deceive people.
               | 
               | As far as using crises to undermine indistinguishability,
               | that was another part of my point: if actions are
               | indistinguishable between two actors we only care about
               | the actors' motivation as an attempt to guess how likely
               | they are to remain indistinguishable. If a crisis causes
               | the two actors to distinguish themselves then, once
               | again, we've undermined the original premise of the
               | experiment.
        
             | DenisM wrote:
             | This presupposes a constantly stable and omnipresent and
             | benevolent society. Which it is not. Society always has
             | reprehensible things in it, sometimes systematically
             | sometimes sporadically. Society is not omnipresent or
             | omniscient. And things go up and down over time. And one is
             | never exposed to the whole society.
        
             | amarant wrote:
             | The counter point to this is the well-meaning idiot who
             | causes destruction by doing things they, quite naively,
             | believe will have positive outcomes.
             | 
             | When the outcome predictably is terrible, do we let them
             | off the hook for meaning well?
        
               | some_furry wrote:
               | I don't know. How are the Kardashians doing?
        
         | mihaic wrote:
         | Well said, this sort of oversimplified dichotomy is used by
         | people to get out of responsability. "We have to choose between
         | X and Y, so I just choose X because it's better".
         | 
         | No wonder the author is a Facebook exec that want to be
         | ignorant of ultimate intent, instead of reconciling them.
        
         | speak_plainly wrote:
         | It is an over simplification but Rousseau does paint this
         | picture of humanity's natural goodness corrupted by society, or
         | what the author calls circumstance. This idea is a cornerstone
         | of the Discourse on Inequality and Emile.
         | 
         | Discourse on the Origin and Foundations of Inequality among Men
         | (1755) - "Nothing is more gentle than man in his primitive
         | state... he is restrained by natural pity from doing harm to
         | others."
         | 
         | Emile, or On Education (1762) - "Everything is good as it
         | leaves the hands of the Author of things; everything
         | degenerates in the hands of man."
         | 
         | Confessions (1782-89) - "I have displayed myself as I was, vile
         | and despicable when I was so, good, generous, sublime when I
         | was so; I have unveiled my interior being."
         | 
         | For Rousseau, humans possess innate moral sentiment, society
         | corrupts through things like comparison, and the good life is
         | maintained by being true to one's natural self.
         | 
         | I also think the focus of this little essay is about
         | contrasting two modern identities, the expressive self and the
         | performative and productive self, and isn't steeped in moral
         | psychology. Bringing Aristotle into this is wholly
         | anachronistic and misses the point.
        
         | mannykannot wrote:
         | Ben Franklin? He took a principled stand against kings that
         | threatened to be extremely costly for himself.
         | 
         | The irony here (given who the author works for) is not lost on
         | me.
        
           | NaomiLehman wrote:
           | 20 years at Meta... That must be tough.
        
             | pavel_lishin wrote:
             | Working at Facebook in 2005 was definitely defensible. I
             | suppose every frog gets boiled, eventually.
        
         | getnormality wrote:
         | I have no position on the OP, but this comment has more shame
         | than content. The couple fig leaves of quibbling over dubiously
         | relevant points doesn't really clarify whether the OP's point
         | is incorrect. I have no reason to take your opinion as more
         | authoritative than the OP's when you don't even really engage
         | with what the OP says.
         | 
         | *edited for nuance
        
           | augusto-moura wrote:
           | I don't agree that the comment is empty, it did remind me of
           | some philosophy classes, and it did entice my curiosity
           | enough to search about Rousseau again. Your comment though,
           | in poethic irony, doesn't bring anything to the table besides
           | complaining about the top comment.
        
           | lukeasrodgers wrote:
           | Here are the article's main points, as I see them:
           | 
           | 1. The "modern American self" is best defined by (the tension
           | between) Franklin and Rousseau. 2. Rousseau believes X and
           | Franklin believes Y. 3. "Modern America" (society? politics?
           | government?) flip flops between these two, though they are
           | "almost entirely incompatible". 4. The author claims one of
           | them scales, and says he likes it.
           | 
           | I engage directly with claims 2 and 3.
           | 
           | I think 1 is another _completely absurd_ simplification. I do
           | not address it, or claim 4. I don 't see how that constitutes
           | lack of engagement or quibbling. Perhaps I could have written
           | an essay refuting OP with many citations, but I don't think
           | that level of work is required to constitute legitimate
           | engagement.
           | 
           | I guess you're probably right that my comment is more shame
           | than content, maybe 60/40 shame to content, I should have
           | dialed that down a bit. Fwiw I think it's fine to be simple-
           | minded and ignorant, I am both of those things about many
           | topics, but then your writing and argumentation should
           | reflect your lack of knowledge and certainty. OP's article
           | is, otoh, full of hot air.
        
             | getnormality wrote:
             | Okay, so, leaving the shame thing behind us, the two gaps
             | that I see:
             | 
             | 1. If someone thinks the human self is essentially good and
             | society makes it bad, they could still be concerned with
             | how people can behave well in society. So the fact that
             | Rousseau wrote about that in The Social Contract doesn't
             | seem to contradict OP.
             | 
             | 2. If it's possible to unite intent and action in a model
             | of a good person, there could still be philosophies that
             | are incompatible by virtue of how they overemphasize one or
             | the other. So again, I don't see how this contradicts the
             | OP.
             | 
             | I agree that the OP is probably full of hot air, but it's a
             | common gloss on Rousseau I think. And definitely supported
             | by the Discourse on Inequality, which says that people have
             | good animal instincts, but their natural expression of
             | these is inhibited by social constructs like language-based
             | reasoning and property.
        
         | alphazard wrote:
         | I didn't know this about Ben Franklin until reading it here,
         | but his theory strikes me as the only one (out of the
         | thinkers/theories you referenced) that can be operationalized
         | in a justice system, or by individuals to judge others.
         | 
         | Until "intention" can be measured with a brain scan, it's a
         | good bet that actions come from successfully actualizing
         | intentions more often than not. It is ultimately about actions
         | though, and the assertion with any intention based theory is
         | that intentions better predict future actions than past actions
         | do. If there was a mysterious 3rd thing that predicted future
         | actions better than intentions or previous actions, then we
         | would be interested in that instead of intentions.
        
       | foofoo12 wrote:
       | > You can't always change how you feel, but you can always decide
       | what to do next.
       | 
       | No. Most people are on autopilot most of the time and they react
       | without thinking. It takes deliberate practice to be able to
       | always decide what to do next.
        
       | Toby1VC wrote:
       | What do you think about the possibility that you are merely
       | existing to be symbolic?
        
       | blenderob wrote:
       | I expect better from the people who lurk at
       | https://news.ycombinator.com/newest and upvote stuff which help
       | decide what reaches the home page. It's sad to see a shallow,
       | pseudo-intellectual piece like this voted to the top. This has
       | been a long time issue in /newest. I lurk there and upvote the
       | good stuff to help it reach home page. But the shallow hot takes
       | and ragebait rise quickly while the real gems like thoughtful
       | posts made from hard work and genuine hacker spirit barely get
       | any votes and rarely reach home page.
        
       | sanjayts wrote:
       | More like "you are what you think".
        
         | immibis wrote:
         | No, literally the opposite of that. That's the model which is
         | being refuted.
        
       | KaiserPro wrote:
       | I do love when Boz espouses opinions.
       | 
       | He has got better them over the years, this one is much less
       | teenager trying to sound clever. Which is great, I love to see
       | people grow.
       | 
       | The problem with this is that in my professional dealings with
       | him, he has two modes: empathetic & arrogant dick. At his worse
       | he was fighting in the comments section of workplace, telling
       | employees that they are wrong. At his best he is warm and caring,
       | even funny.
       | 
       | The problem for meta employees, is that most of the time you only
       | really see arrogant dick boz.
        
         | some_furry wrote:
         | Hmm. I got the same impression from this article, despite
         | having never heard of the guy before.
        
         | kragen wrote:
         | Were they wrong?
        
           | KaiserPro wrote:
           | Yes, demonstrably.
           | 
           | https://www.trustedreviews.com/news/meta-smartwatch-
           | leaked-a...
           | 
           | That abomination should have been killed from the start.
           | 
           | the lack of attention to user experience in _any_ of the RL
           | based products
           | 
           | The utterly stupid "blockchain compatibility" policy, which
           | was too late, to fucking stupid and poorly executed.
           | 
           | The inability to run _any_ project in RL that delivered any
           | kind of value
           | 
           | (horizon's many many many iterations is an affront to any
           | kind of good governance)
        
             | kragen wrote:
             | So it was pretty important and beneficial for _someone_ to
             | tell them so, and Boz ended up being the guy? That doesn 't
             | sound like his worst; keeping his mouth shut on other
             | occasions was almost certainly worse.
        
               | Centigonal wrote:
               | I think GP is saying that Boz was wrong (he was VP of
               | VR), not the FB staffer he was arguing with. GP should
               | clarify.
        
               | KaiserPro wrote:
               | Sorry yes, Boz was wrong repeatedly. Specifically in this
               | instance, he was arguing about HR policy, on an HR policy
               | post.
               | 
               | Don't get me wrong, there were, and probably still are, a
               | bunch of entitled pricks who are willing to post about
               | the most stupid shit (I AM SHOCKED!!! that the meat was
               | chewy, etc, etc, etc) but the CTO shouldn't be fighting
               | in the comments section of someone else's back yard, when
               | his own was on fire.
        
               | kragen wrote:
               | Oh, yeah, that puts a different spin on it.
        
         | raffael_de wrote:
         | So this text is not "teenager trying to sound clever"? I just
         | thought that this is the best summary of it.
        
         | herval wrote:
         | My best memory of boz is him arguing with an intern on
         | workspace and calling them "privileged", during COVID, when the
         | kid asked whether the company would provide some sort of cash
         | bonus since the free meals weren't available.
         | 
         | "Teenager trying to sound clever" captures every other
         | interaction perfectly.
        
         | swiftcoder wrote:
         | > this one is much less teenager trying to sound clever
         | 
         | On the other hand, it's very much freshman-who-misunderstood-
         | philosophy-101-and-integrated-it-into-his-worldview-anyway...
        
           | photonthug wrote:
           | In philosophy 101 the usual foil for _Rousseau vs.._ would be
           | Hobbes, but that framing with a realist /pessimist would not
           | be popular with the intended audience, where the goal is to
           | lionize the nationalist, the inventors/owners, the 1%.
           | 
           | > Despite his own moral lapses, Franklin saw himself as
           | uniquely qualified to instruct Americans in morality. He
           | tried to influence American moral life through the
           | construction of a printing network based on a chain of
           | partnerships from the Carolinas to New England. He thereby
           | invented the first newspaper chain.
           | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Benjamin_Franklin#Newspaperman
           | 
           | To be clear Franklin's obviously a complicated historical
           | figure, a pretty awesome guy overall, and I do like American
           | pragmatism generally. But it matters a lot which part of the
           | guy you'd like to hold up for admiration, and elevating a
           | preachy hypocrite that was an early innovator in monopolies
           | and methods of controlling the masses does seem pretty
           | tactical and self-serving here.
        
         | triceratops wrote:
         | > this one is much less teenager trying to sound clever
         | 
         | I read the blog post without knowing who this person is. I
         | genuinely believed the author was a young person, maybe someone
         | in their early 20s, just figuring some stuff out. "Do good
         | things" isn't exactly a deep philosophical or moral insight.
         | I've read the same thing on Cracked for chrissakes.
        
       | notepad0x90 wrote:
       | Interesting, this post mentions two views but glosses over what
       | many (most? I don't know) Americans have always believed: That we
       | humans are inherently corrupt and evil by nature and need to be
       | taught to do good and need to have a spiritual rebirth (the term
       | is "born again") to transform our nature. The "born again" part
       | from what I understand is mainly evangelized by protest
       | Christians but the rest is consistent across all denominations.
       | 
       | I know that the percentage of Christians has declined over the
       | years, back in the early days of the country they used to even
       | have mass at congress every Sunday. So, fair to say the amount of
       | Americans who believe this has declined, but still a significant
       | portion.
       | 
       | Nevertheless, Ben Franklin and the rest may have been famous but
       | they by no means reflect the beliefs of the masses at the time.
       | As much as Obama, AOC and Tom Cruise's beliefs don't reflect
       | modern American's views.
       | 
       | It's quite the contrast. across societies, even people isolated
       | from the rest of humanity for thousands of years, you'll find the
       | same moral failures such as murder, rape, invasions and wars of
       | aggression, prejudice,etc.. The view that "the world corrupts us"
       | is hard to buy, even when we have everything we could possibly
       | want (think healthy billionaire good), our moral character
       | doesn't change, even when one is born into that life. Even
       | without considering complexities like the meaning of morality, by
       | a person's own accepted beliefs of morality and ethics, we fail
       | by default. we do what is convenient over what we believe is
       | right.
       | 
       | The title of "You are how you act" is sort of true, but it is
       | more accurate to say "You are how you decide". If we're programs,
       | a program is the instructions it executes. The input data it
       | processes and the execution environment will decide which
       | instructions it processes for sure, and most bugs are triggered
       | by specific input, but that does not change the fact that the
       | bugs exist as an inherent nature of the program. And for us at
       | least, we prefer to execute the most efficient (convenient)
       | instructions instead of the most correct.
        
       | dcre wrote:
       | Vacuous, useless little piece. Sham thinking.
        
       | redbell wrote:
       | The title reminds me of the quote that goes.. : "You are not what
       | you think you are, but what you _think_ , you _are_ ".
        
       | DavidPiper wrote:
       | Well that's a completely artificial either-or straw man.
       | 
       | It is possible to make progress while trying to do good. Lots of
       | people do that.
        
       | begueradj wrote:
       | >"The repetition of behavior, not the sincerity of belief, is
       | what shapes character"
       | 
       | To perform behavior X repeatedly and consciously for a long time,
       | you have to have a belief (whether it is good or bad). Hence it
       | is the sincerity of belief which shapes character.
       | 
       | Like when you wash yourself every now and then: you repeat that
       | because you have a belief that keeping yourself clean is useful.
       | Without that belief, you won't waste your time on that. Behavior
       | is just an expression of a belief.
        
       | Dilettante_ wrote:
       | I find the Franklin model far more useful [...] because it gives
       | you agency.
       | 
       | Does it? If our present actions make our future selves, that
       | means our past actions made our present self. The moments in a
       | person's life are a row of dominoes, one causing the next. There
       | is no agency anywhere.
        
         | andai wrote:
         | In that case, my choice to interpret myself as having agency
         | was made, by itself, in the actual absence of agency. Neat!
        
         | StevePerkins wrote:
         | This sounds like me always complaining about "Past Me"'s tech
         | debt. Or when tech debt is being introduced, my team jokes
         | about it being "Future Me"'s problem. It's good for a chuckle,
         | but obviously there is continuity of identity.
         | 
         | But continuity is not immutability. Your actions are a present
         | thing, and define you in the present. Past actions may have
         | consequences, but you are always free to act differently now.
         | Likewise, your present actions don't carve a future identity in
         | stone, either. "The rent is due everyday", so to speak.
        
           | Dilettante_ wrote:
           | We may be talking about two different things. When you say
           | "Past actions may have consequences, but you are always free
           | to act differently now.", I believe you mean that as in "just
           | because you have ordered chocolate ice cream every time in
           | the past does not mean it's impossible for you to order
           | vanilla the next time", yes?
           | 
           | Whereas what I am talking about is "all of your past
           | experiences, the circumstances of your birth, your genetic
           | predispositions and the weather in Myanmar, have created a
           | world-state in which you choose chocolate today. By
           | definition, you _will_ choose chocolate. "
           | 
           | My point is that there is no "you" which makes choices in the
           | present, independent from the circumstances which created it.
        
       | raffael_de wrote:
       | I'd say the modern American self is best defined by what you
       | believe how other's perceive you and whether you are popular or
       | not.
        
       | jbs789 wrote:
       | I found myself asking: what is he trying to achieve with this
       | post.
       | 
       | It all just seems a bit muddled once you consider his actions.
       | 
       | Just seems like self justification.
       | 
       | Or some direction for his employees - don't think, do.
       | 
       | Oh right, this is the Facebook CTO. That's entirely consistent
       | with their behaviour.
        
       | sidcool wrote:
       | Somehow this link got deboosted.
        
       | vhantz wrote:
       | > "Fake it until you make it" is often dismissed as shallow, but
       | it's closer to Franklin's truth. Faking it long enough is making
       | it. The repetition of behavior, not the sincerity of belief, is
       | what shapes character. You become the kind of person who does the
       | things you repeatedly do.
       | 
       | Then you become the kind of person who fakes things?
        
         | freedomben wrote:
         | Exactly, and it has the potential to really burn others as well
         | as yourself, when they do their work/job on top of what you
         | claimed you had. I am not a fan of the "fake it til you make
         | it" approach.
        
       | tinfoilhatter wrote:
       | More moral grandstanding and "advice" from the CTO of one of the
       | most immoral corporations in the world. Never ceases to amaze me
       | how highly these people think of themselves while they build and
       | work for companies that consistently engage in morally bankrupt
       | behavior. Talk about a complete lack of self-awareness.
        
         | dbtc wrote:
         | It's almost like people are using some kind of technology that
         | lets them live in personalized bubbles with a conveniently
         | simplified version of reality.
        
       | georgemcbay wrote:
       | Batman Begins did it better than this blog post.
       | 
       | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwvrzauErQ0
        
       | Atlas667 wrote:
       | Rich people justifying liberalism through shitty wotdsmithing
       | will never end.
        
       | ptx wrote:
       | > _Faking it long enough is making it. The repetition of
       | behavior, not the sincerity of belief, is what shapes character.
       | You become the kind of person who does the things you repeatedly
       | do._
       | 
       | OK, sure. And if you are faking it, the behavior you are
       | repeating is to fraudulently misrepresent your work to other
       | people, creating undisclosed risks for those who rely on it. The
       | kind of person you become is a liar and a scammer. If you make it
       | in the end, the price for your success is paid by those you
       | deceived on the way.
        
       | wvlia5 wrote:
       | As we know from Yoneda Lemma
        
       | pgspaintbrush wrote:
       | A friend once told me that virtue is like going to the gym. You
       | practice daily, start with smaller weights (virtuous acts), and
       | review how well you did on a regular basis. You ask "am I getting
       | better at this?" rather than "am I morally perfect?"
       | 
       | If you aren't on the level of the moral greats, you start small
       | and try to build up, the same way you'd start by running a 5k
       | before running an ultramarathon.
       | 
       | I hope others out there find this viewpoint as helpful as I have.
        
       | crisdias wrote:
       | So... you are a bad person then, Boz?
        
       | anon-3988 wrote:
       | Our society lives and breathes this contradiction. We believe in
       | determinism and demands justice. We believe in an omnipotent God
       | and is sinful. On a personal level, there is quite literally
       | nothing "you" can do to change yourself; to change oneself, one
       | has to change to one that changes oneself. This is recursive.
       | Looking at it this way, the important thing is to create an
       | environment, situation, society that makes it easier to change
       | oneself for the better. "Show me the incentives, and I will tell
       | you what happens" as someone might say.
        
       | thehours wrote:
       | This reminded me of this passage from Anxiety Is the Dizziness of
       | Freedom by Ted Chiang:
       | 
       | > None of us are saints, but we can all try to be better. Each
       | time you do something generous, you're shaping yourself into
       | someone who's more likely to be generous next time, and that
       | matters.
        
         | aitchnyu wrote:
         | The soul takes on the color of its thoughts - Marcus Aurelius.
         | In context, he wrote about the reams of thoughts that fly in
         | our heads and how we automatically rubber stamp most of them as
         | "true".
        
       | NickC25 wrote:
       | You most certainly are, Boz.
       | 
       | You've pursued "growth" and made a bunch of wealthy people (who
       | certainly don't need the money) a magnitude wealthier, by
       | exploiting the negative side of youth self-consciousness.
       | 
       | You're the CTO of what effectively is a capitalist bastard hybrid
       | of the NSA, a town square, and an invasive, digital version of
       | the yellow pages.
       | 
       | You've made more money than most of us combined will see in a
       | lifetime and you still continue to force ads on us, and negative
       | content on young people.
       | 
       | You are how you act, indeed.
        
       | bloomingeek wrote:
       | Bottom line, life is tough. Too much noise, variables and chances
       | to screw up. (And a hundred other "things" not written.)
       | Perfectionism and social competition have been warping life since
       | the beginning. Cruelty is usually the default option when the
       | pressures on.
       | 
       | I can't speak for others, but for me, it's effort and seeking
       | forgiveness that counts. Even then, life is still tough. Not
       | breaking the accepted, compassionate laws and keeping my mouth
       | shut when needed goes a long way.
        
       | allemagne wrote:
       | >The modern American self is best defined by two Enlightenment
       | thinkers who never met but have been arguing in our heads ever
       | since.
       | 
       | This reads to me a little like: "The distracted boyfriend meme
       | can be found at the helm of the Western mind whenever we
       | encounter betrayal and disloyalty."
       | 
       | I get that this is more of a trope or a shorthand than literally
       | saying that a certain thinker invented the idea of a good person
       | being defined by their actions, but to me it's worth saying that
       | these concepts and ideas are probably as timeless as language,
       | not something invented a few hundred years ago, not something
       | invented by Plato.
        
       | powersurge360 wrote:
       | I didn't see it mentioned in the comments so I guess I get to be
       | the person to post the quote!
       | 
       | > "We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what
       | we pretend to be"
       | 
       | Excerpt From Mother Night Kurt Vonnegut
       | 
       | This is often quoted from Mother Night but it's actually in the
       | preface so I don't know how many people actually see it within
       | the work. Anyways, rather than self aggrandizing in the way the
       | linked article is, the story in the book is a cautionary take.
       | The book is about a Nazi propagandist that is secretly an
       | American agent feeding broadcast lines to the Allied forces in
       | subtleties in communicating his propaganda like pauses in between
       | words and other tics.
       | 
       | The idea in the book is what does it matter to be a good person
       | in private but a driver of evil in public? How much bad does it
       | take to outweigh good and if you do bad things to effect
       | something positive, are you absolved of those bad things anyways?
       | 
       | No, I think not. If you do ill to achieve good you are
       | accountable to both. It is easy, sometimes, to imagine that some
       | thing you've done has overridden and eliminated some other thing
       | you've done but it isn't really true. You've done both. I
       | recognize I'm speaking in circles a little but I think it's
       | important to confront the idea that the things you've done are
       | not undone by other things you've done just because you feel the
       | ends have justified the means.
       | 
       | Remember that who you think you are is a private fantasy. Who you
       | actually are is how you are experienced.
        
       | lo_zamoyski wrote:
       | Human identity is first a question for philosophical
       | anthropology. What does it mean to be human? What is the nature
       | of human identity? What is the nature of individual human
       | identity? What does it mean to be a social animal, especially a
       | human social animal? What does it mean to be an intellectual
       | animal? A moral animal? What is personhood? And so on.
       | 
       | You will discover that there are different aspects to what and
       | whom a person is. How we act is a matter of volition and thus
       | choice motivated by reasoning. Our actions are expressions of the
       | powers we possess, that is, exercised potentials that belong to
       | us. Thus, our actions are the expression of our moral agency; I
       | _choose_ to _exercise_ certain potentials for certain _reasons_.
       | The reasons we do things have moral import - they are part of the
       | act as two apparently similar acts are different if the motives
       | are different, making our motives partly constitutive of the
       | moral character of an act. The exercise of our potential per se
       | likewise has moral import - it is the motive made manifest in
       | act.
       | 
       | Each act is a step in some direction. There is an expression that
       | each decision moves us either toward heaven or toward hell. A
       | good act is both good in motivation and in the motivated act. A
       | good act actualizes and develops the human person acting toward a
       | fruition and fullness of humanity-in-potency. A bad act acts
       | against such fruition, corrupting the person through ill motive
       | and damaging acts, or squandering potential when there is a moral
       | possibility of exercise.
       | 
       | So, from a _moral_ perspective, we can say that we are our
       | decided acts. The acts are not just ticked off boxes on a list,
       | but actualizations of the person. There are higher actualizations
       | and lower actualizations.
       | 
       | In that sense, to speak of actions and intentions as if they were
       | distinct is a false dichotomy. You can speak of reasoning and
       | motives as the "inner" aspect and the manifested act as the
       | "outer" aspect, if you want. But they constitute a single act as
       | a matter of fact. You cannot speak intelligibly of one without
       | reference to the other for the same reason you cannot speak of a
       | cause or its effect without reference to the other. The nature of
       | an act is both in motive and in execution.
       | 
       | And "fake it until you make it" is a misunderstanding. There is
       | nothing fake involved. I have potentials. Initially, I do not
       | have experience exercising them. I have little familiarity with
       | them. So I _try_ to exercise them. Typically, first attempts aren
       | 't very good, but I learn from the effects of my trial, and
       | perhaps from the feedback of others, to "calibrate" my subsequent
       | attempts. This is called practice. I repeat in order to discover
       | and work out and strengthen the actualization of a potential.
       | This is a not error in a moral sense. It is a kind of dialogue
       | with nature.
        
       | pyrale wrote:
       | Interesting view from the CTO of Meta.
       | 
       | What does that make him?
        
       | gbacon wrote:
       | See also _Atomic Habits_ by James Clear:
       | https://jamesclear.com/atomic-habits
       | 
       | In Franklin's autobiography, he names 13 virtues and describes
       | his "fake it until you make it" approach, as boz characterizes
       | it.
       | 
       |  _My intention being to acquire the_ habitude _of all these
       | virtues, I judged it would be well not to distract my attention
       | by attempting the whole at once, but to fix it on one of them at
       | a time, and, when I should be master of that, then to proceed to
       | another, and so on, till I should have gone thro' the thirteen;
       | and, as the previous acquisition of some might facilitate the
       | acquisition of certain others, I arranged them with that view, as
       | they stand above. Temperance first, as it tends to procure that
       | coolness and clearness of head which is so necessary where
       | constant vigilance was to be kept up, and guard maintained
       | against the unremitting attraction of ancient habits and the
       | force of perpetual temptations. This being acquired and
       | established, Silence would be more easy; and my desire being to
       | gain knowledge at the same time that I improved in virtue, and
       | considering that in conversation it was obtained rather by the
       | use of the ears than of the tongue, and therefore wishing to
       | break a habit I was getting into prattling, punning, and joking,
       | which only made me acceptable to trifling company, I gave_
       | Silence _the second place. This and the next,_ Order, _I expected
       | would allow me more time for attending to my project and my
       | studies. Resolution, once because habitual, would keep me firm in
       | my endeavors to obtain all the subsequent virtues;_ Frugality
       | _and Industry, freeing me from my remaining debt, and producing
       | affluence and independence, would make more easy the practice of
       | Sincerity and Justice, etc., Conceiving, then, that, agreeably to
       | the advice of Pythagoras in his Garden Verses, daily examination
       | would be necessary, I contrived the following method for
       | conducting that examination._ (emphasis original)
       | 
       | https://www.ushistory.org/franklin/autobiography/page38.htm
       | 
       | He further describes how he tracked his progress.
       | 
       |  _I made a little book, in which I allotted a page for each of
       | the virtues. I ruled each page with red ink, so as to have seven
       | columns, one for each day of the week, marking each column with a
       | letter for the day. I crossed these columns with thirteen red
       | lines, marking the beginning of each line with the first letter
       | of one of the virtues, on which line, and in its proper column, I
       | might mark, by a little black spot, every fault I found upon
       | examination to have been committed respecting that virtue upon
       | that day._
       | 
       | See p. 39 for his table:
       | https://www.ushistory.org/franklin/autobiography/page39.htm
       | 
       |  _I determined to give a week's strict attention to each of the
       | virtues successively. Thus, in the first week, my great guard was
       | to avoid every the least offense against_ Temperance, _leaving
       | the other virtues to their ordinary chance, only marking every
       | evening the faults of the day. Thus, if in the first week I could
       | keep my first line, marked T, clear of spots, I supposed the
       | habit of that virtue so much strengthened, and its opposite
       | weakened, that I might venture extending my attention to include
       | the next, and for the following week keep both lines clear of
       | spots. Proceeding thus to the last, I could go thro' a course
       | complete in thirteen weeks, and four courses in a years. And like
       | him who, having a garden to weed, does not attempt to eradicate
       | all the bad herbs at once, which would exceed his reach and his
       | strength, but works on one of the beds at a time, and, having
       | accomplished the first, proceeds to a second, so I should have, I
       | hoped, the encouraging pleasure of seeing on my pages the
       | progress I made in virtue, by clearing successively my lines of
       | their spots, till in the end, by a number of courses, I should be
       | happy in viewing a clean book, after a thirteen weeks' daily
       | examination._
        
       | skolskoly wrote:
       | Fake it til you make it is good. But, better yet, we figured out
       | you can just keep faking it until some other sucker wants to hold
       | the bag.
        
         | freedomben wrote:
         | I'm at a point where I'm hesitant to do any business with tech
         | startups because I've been burned so many times by the "fake it
         | til you make it" approach of saying their product did things it
         | doesn't do. In one particular vendor's case, I found out about
         | the fakery when the product I shipped on top of their platform
         | keeps getting hacked.
         | 
         | I've probably swung the pendulum the other way too far, but
         | I've gotten very direct and frank with what we have today, what
         | we can deliver tomorrow, and whether it's something we won't
         | add to our product.
        
       | Xemplolo wrote:
       | You learn to act by doing it.
       | 
       | The more you do it, the more automatic it is.
       | 
       | For example: I took ritalin on and off but with long enough
       | phases, that I do have behavour patterns were i act like i was on
       | ritalin (cleaning stuff etc.)
       | 
       | I also thought about people who drunk a lot more alcohol when
       | they were younger: they learned how to be a certain way because
       | they were able to act like this by drinking alcohol.
       | 
       | I took MDMA a lot later in life and when i was, i definitly had
       | like a 'MDMA dance echo' in my brain after.
        
       | akshatjiwan wrote:
       | Rousseau was famous for saying that man is born free and is
       | everywhere in chains. He advocated for self rule and formulation
       | of laws by the people. Yet after 100s of years of democracy
       | (thousands really) the corrupting influence of social norms has
       | not really been remedied.
       | 
       | Inequalities still exist,corruption still happens and social
       | institutions that were once liberating become oppressive over
       | time.
       | 
       | His ideal of self governance has not been realised as most nation
       | states have adopted a representative democracy. People don't
       | really make the rules. They just handover the power to someone
       | else who makes them on their behalf.
       | 
       | It's certainly right that Franklin believed in practicing virtue.
       | He famously kept a log of his good and bad actions.
       | 
       | Yet there is another great philosopher that has had tremendous
       | impact on American society whom the author has not mentioned.
       | Emerson believed in transcending societal definition of virtue
       | and vice and follow one's own inclinations. His ideas of self
       | reliance resonated with American people and brought about a
       | change in their thinking when they started to believe in
       | themselves rather than looking to Europe for intellectual
       | guidance.
       | 
       | I find it difficult to accept either Franklin's or Rousseau's
       | view as they were more politically motivated--Rousseau wanted his
       | social contract,Franklin worshiped Socrates but when it came to
       | governence he kicked him aside to chose democracy,an idea that
       | was popular at the time due to thinkers like Locke.
       | 
       | Emerson gave people true agency over their lives and inspired
       | them to think critically and not sheepishly believe a thing to be
       | good or bad. He was more revolutionary than Franklin (Self
       | reliance was released around the time of civil war) and gave
       | people courage to question institutional authority and he
       | eventually became more impactful than Rousseau's collectivism.
        
       | ruszki wrote:
       | > you can always decide what to do next.
       | 
       | I think everybody can find examples from their life when this was
       | not true. And not even just simple one like a reaction to a
       | flying object towards your face, but some high level impulses,
       | like when I was in love, I definitely couldn't control my acts
       | completely. Of course, I was still responsible for my acts, but
       | they were only instincts, no real thinking was involved.
        
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