[HN Gopher] Can You Lose Your Native Tongue? (2024)
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       Can You Lose Your Native Tongue? (2024)
        
       Author : Thevet
       Score  : 24 points
       Date   : 2025-02-18 18:34 UTC (3 days ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (www.nytimes.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (www.nytimes.com)
        
       | abctx wrote:
       | https://archive.ph/EQjeG
        
         | croisillon wrote:
         | thanks but somehow the first paragraph doesn't show up properly
         | on my end                 It happened the first time over
         | dinner. I was saying something to my husband, who grew up in
         | Paris where we live, and suddenly couldn't get the word out.
         | The culprit was the "r." For the previous few months, I had
         | been trying to perfect the French "r." My failure to do so was
         | the last marker of my Americanness, and I could only do it if I
         | concentrated, moving the sound backward in my mouth and
         | exhaling at the same time. Now I was saying something in
         | English -- "reheat" or "rehash" -- and the "r" was refusing to
         | come forward. The word felt like a piece of dough stuck in my
         | throat.
        
       | yawnxyz wrote:
       | I grew up in Stockholm / grew up speaking Swedish. Haven't spoken
       | Swedish unless I'm at IKEA (for some reason Swedes flock
       | there?!), which doesn't happen very often.
       | 
       | I can still read/understand but it's hard to remember words
        
       | nosianu wrote:
       | I remember reading about a German woman who after the end of WWII
       | married one of the American soldiers and moved to the US with
       | him. She then never needed to use German again until she was
       | quite old. She barely spoke any German by that time. I think she
       | was interviewed by a German journalist - that's why I ended up
       | reading about it.
        
         | echelon wrote:
         | Do you remember where you read this? That's a fascinating
         | anecdote.
        
           | nosianu wrote:
           | I'm almost sure this was pre-Internet and paper. Asking
           | Google is useless, I only get general pages about German "war
           | brides". I'm trying to ask ChatGPT but right now it seems to
           | hang while loading. I thought about asking DeepSeek, but I
           | don't want to create a login (the ChatGPT site does not
           | require one).
           | 
           | EDIT: ChatGPT actually loaded. I used the first paragraph of
           | my comment as query. It did not give me a specific story, but
           | it claims it "knows" about the phenomenon of German war
           | brides forgetting much of their German, when they did not use
           | it much after moving. Too bad I can't tell what the sources
           | are for that information, ChatGPT saying something isn't
           | proof.
        
         | sfRattan wrote:
         | There were large swathes of Americans in those generations who
         | stopped using German publicly because of World Wars One and
         | Two. German was at the time the second most commonly spoken
         | language at home in America. You still see vestiges of it in
         | recorded data about ancestry [1].
         | 
         | I suspect many among them would've largely forgotten a
         | functional knowledge of German by the ends of their lives, even
         | though it was their mother tongue and kitchen table language
         | growing up.
         | 
         | [1]:
         | https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_ancestry#/media/Fil...
        
           | detourdog wrote:
           | In the heart of Pennsylvania Dutch Country was a town that
           | Bismark that changed its name to Quentin after Quentin
           | Roosevelt died in the Great War (WW I).
           | 
           | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quentin,_Pennsylvania
        
       | kps wrote:
       | Anecdata... my first language was German, which I can no longer
       | speak (and never learned to read).
        
         | antithesis-nl wrote:
         | That's interesting, because for me, being able to read a
         | language comes first, then being able to understand it being
         | spoken, then speaking it in some (but definitely not all)
         | contexts.
         | 
         | So, you spoke German at some point, but these days, you could
         | not decipher a restaurant menu or ticket-vending machine? Not
         | meant disparagingly, just truly curious...
        
       | dzuc wrote:
       | An excellent book on this:
       | https://www.zonebooks.org/books/43-echolalias-on-the-forgett...
        
       | markus92 wrote:
       | Languages need a lot of upkeep if you want to keep speaking them
       | fluently. On the other hand, just like muscle, once you've had it
       | it's a lot easier to get back than having to put it on for the
       | first time.
        
         | MandieD wrote:
         | My husband's mother, a German who spent a few semesters in
         | Britain in the late 50s and subsequently taught English and
         | geography in gymnasium (German academic track middle and high
         | school), taught him and few other neighborhood children some
         | English during her maternity year after his younger sister was
         | born. He was 4. She then went back to work, he went into
         | regular German Kindergarten (preschool), and the whole matter
         | was forgotten.
         | 
         | Until he was 10 and started classroom English in 5th grade - he
         | had a very easy time of it. That year of getting English sounds
         | into his little kid brain, despite coming from a non-native
         | speaker who had only spent a few semesters in England, did some
         | sort of magic, because ever since I've known him, he's sounded
         | British enough to fool Americans (British people, on the other
         | hand, can hear that something's off, and of course can't place
         | his accent). He's a more fluent English speaker than I am a
         | German speaker, but we both have to speak more English at our
         | jobs than German.
        
       | MandieD wrote:
       | I've lived in Germany for twenty years, and despite speaking what
       | I would consider a merely adequate and certainly not native level
       | of German, I've noticed that there's something a bit off about
       | how I speak English. It's glaringly apparent when I'm back in
       | Texas. Like the author, I make some strange word choices that are
       | almost like direct translations from German, and it's had an
       | effect on my grammar, too.
       | 
       | We're raising our kid to be bilingual (my husband is German), but
       | I wonder how truly "native" my kid's English will be with me as
       | his main source of it.
        
         | rednafi wrote:
         | Sports machen?
        
       | aeyes wrote:
       | Almost impossible in this day and age unless you move when you
       | are very young. Today the world is so connected that you always
       | have some exposure to the language unless you go completely
       | offline.
       | 
       | In my case it's been almost 10 years since I emigrated. I rarely
       | speak my native tongue but I can hop on a call any minute and
       | have no problems speaking or understanding. I more frequently
       | forget words or they don't come out the right way but I'm still
       | much more proficient than in any other language.
       | 
       | My native tongue is the only language in which I know the words
       | for very specific things, for example the names of all the tools
       | in a hardware store, names of plants or any word which you use
       | once every ten years. After a certain age there is just no way to
       | learn all that anymore. Because of that my brain switches between
       | languages all the time and I keep everything fresh.
        
       | munchbunny wrote:
       | Yes, you can (I submit myself as the example), but I'm not sure
       | that the article/author is talking about _fluency_. Anecdotally,
       | I lost fluency in my native tongue during my teens, though I don
       | 't carry a non-native accent when I do speak it.
       | 
       | However, I speak/read/write in what is technically my second
       | language (English) as if it were my first language.
        
         | riwsky wrote:
         | as if it _were_
        
           | munchbunny wrote:
           | Ha. Got me.
        
           | przemub wrote:
           | past subjunctive, bit** :)
        
         | hn_acc1 wrote:
         | Same here. I left my native country (family chose to move) when
         | I was 8. By 12 or 13 I was probably more fluent in English than
         | the original, although I continued to read, etc. I can still
         | read, think a bit, help my family with duo lingo, but fluency
         | would be a stretch so many years later. However, I have no
         | doubt that if I moved back home, I could pick a fair amount up
         | again in a few months. But I would probably forever be "teenage
         | slang" non-fluent, as well as missing out on common idioms,
         | etc.
         | 
         | My father left his birthplace when he was 4 or 5, and only
         | knows a few words of his first language.
        
       | kshacker wrote:
       | I lived in a Hindi speaking area for my first 23 years. Then I
       | lived in a cosmopolitan area for 5 years. And then I lived in US
       | for 14 years predominantly speaking english.
       | 
       | At that point, I moved back to India. And I had to converse with
       | a telephone company call center, even though I selected English
       | as my language in the phone tree, they repeatedly put me to Hindi
       | speaking ones - I just could not converse with them. I tried. I
       | could absolutely understand them, but I could just not speak
       | hindi. The words or rather the sentences will not form.
       | 
       | Not any more. I think now I am truly bi/trilingual, but there was
       | that day / week / month / year, when I had lost the ability to
       | speak in Hindi. Not sure why, and it was not a one time event.
       | 
       | [ The only additional information that may be relevant : In
       | between these years, I learned a semester of Russian. I learnt
       | french. I got familiar with a multitude of south Indian languages
       | - Tamil, Kannada, Telugu, Malayalam hearing friends speak them on
       | a regular basis. And I was also conversant with Punjabi, common
       | in our region in north india. But I never spoke any of these in
       | day to day life for 14 years. And all these languages blurred
       | into each other when I really had to use something other than
       | English. ]
       | 
       | [ Also, I had a reason to switch to English pretty much
       | exclusively. My son has learning disability and would find it
       | hard in school as he will speak in Hindi and teachers would not
       | understand. This is a long time back. So I decided not to confuse
       | him and switched to english exclusively and lived like that for
       | about a dozen years before this telephone company incident
       | happened. I have posted about him before, this is not new:
       | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28665942 ]
        
         | qwerty456127 wrote:
         | Wow. English+Hindi+French+Russian+Tamil+.... So cool. You
         | should probably add some Arabic, some Chinese, some Xhosa, some
         | Gaelic and some native American languages to this list to
         | appear endlessly awesome :-)
        
           | kshacker wrote:
           | I can not speak most of them. But having friends speak them
           | for years makes you start catching the words, phrases,
           | sentences and even the context though not equally well, not
           | all the time, and not the same for each language - this is
           | for the South Indian languages. I did formally study French
           | and Russian (1 semester). And lol, I took Russian when the
           | USSR still existed :) Those were the days.
           | 
           | Edit - I think I am done. I want to learn Spanish since it
           | will be useful locally, but my brain can not take any more
           | confusion. When you do not use these regularly, but have a
           | faint notion of many many words, the brain does get confused
           | on a regular basis. And I was not trying to brag, expressing
           | helplessness.
        
       | jmclnx wrote:
       | Yes you can. I know a few people who did. They came over to the
       | US as teenagers and their parents refused to speak their
       | language. So as the aged, they forgot more and more.
        
       | delduca wrote:
       | Coincidentally, I was watching an interview today with someone
       | from my country. This person lived for decades in a country where
       | English is spoken, and several times when they pronounced a word
       | from here, it came with an English accent.
        
       | antithesis-nl wrote:
       | From personal anecdata, I can assure you it's entirely possible
       | to 'lose' a language ability. Native tongue? Not so sure, but a
       | closely-related one, definitely!
       | 
       | I'm a native Dutch speaker and used to be relatively fluent in
       | German (which is not a given: despite being close neighbors, the
       | languages are _very_ different). Then, I lived in Cape Town for a
       | while, and had to learn some Afrikaans (also closely related to
       | Dutch, but yet widely dissimilar).
       | 
       | This somehow 'erased' my ability to speak German! Only after
       | moving back to Europe and after many years, I was able to do
       | basic stuff like ordering in restaurants in German again.
       | 
       | TL;DR: the human brain is, like, weird, man...
        
       | jaimebuelta wrote:
       | Something strange. I (Spanish speaker having lived in an English
       | speaking country for 15 years) still struggle with maths. It's
       | really difficult to understand numbers that are relatively high
       | (hundreds and thousands) unless I can see them written.
       | 
       | And making calculation is almost impossible. I need to switch to
       | Spanish and then translate it back
        
       | exe34 wrote:
       | my favourite anecdote about languages was when I went to see
       | Salman Rushdie talk. His accent was perfectly north American
       | while he spoke about contemporary things, but when he spoke about
       | his childhood in India, he started speaking with a slight Indian
       | accent.
       | 
       | I think the memories are encoded in terms of the thoughts of the
       | time, so when they are revisited, they reactivate the same speech
       | patterns.
        
       | rednafi wrote:
       | Yes. My native tongue is Bengali--the 7th most spoken language in
       | the world.
       | 
       | I learned English at school and later started working remotely in
       | places where English was obviously the primary language. Then I
       | moved to the US and spoke Bengali only at home.
       | 
       | The final nail in the coffin was when I moved again to Berlin,
       | Germany, and started picking up a little German just to get by.
       | Now I speak English at work, Bengali at home, and a tiny bit of
       | German. These days, my Bengali is a horrible hodgepodge of
       | English and Bengali words strung together by alien conjunctions
       | and interjections.
        
       | graeme wrote:
       | Absolutely. Have met multiple people who could not speak their
       | native language after a long absence from their homeland.
       | 
       | In a few cases I've met people who could speak no language well.
       | Their native tongue was gone or degraded but they had not
       | achieved strong proficiency in English or the local language.
       | 
       | One was a tailor in Montreal. Tried English and French, they were
       | so so at both and said they were from Italy originally. I speak
       | some Italian so tried that. They struggled more than in English
       | or French. They looked around 80, likely had been many decades.
        
         | whamlastxmas wrote:
         | I think the 80 years old part is the biggest contributor there
        
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