[HN Gopher] Why can't we remember our lives as babies or toddlers?
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Why can't we remember our lives as babies or toddlers?
        
       Author : bookofjoe
       Score  : 206 points
       Date   : 2025-02-17 23:44 UTC (23 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (www.theguardian.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (www.theguardian.com)
        
       | jprd wrote:
       | I absolutely have memories before 3, and I've always been
       | frustrated when told I've recreated them from stories and/or
       | pictures.
        
         | catmanjan wrote:
         | You do realise you've just recrated those memories from stories
         | or pictures?
        
           | MikeTheGreat wrote:
           | This being HN it was only a matter of time before someone
           | found a way to shift the conversation to Rust.
           | 
           | Well played, sir, well played! :)
        
             | akagusu wrote:
             | I think it's time to rewrite the brain in Rust, making use
             | of its memory safety features to prevent memory leaks
        
               | steveklabnik wrote:
               | Rust does not prevent memory leaks.
        
               | akagusu wrote:
               | No? Really? So what is the point? Why are people so crazy
               | about Rust?
        
               | steveklabnik wrote:
               | Yes.
               | 
               | > So what is the point?
               | 
               | What Rust helps with is _memory safety_ , which is stuff
               | like dangling pointers and use-after-free. Memory leaks
               | are not a safety issue, they're an efficiency issue.
               | 
               | > Why are people so crazy about Rust?
               | 
               | The whole memory safety thing isn't actually the reason
               | so many people love Rust. In the Rust 2024 community
               | survey, 82% of users agreed that "Rust allows us to build
               | relatively correct and bug free software." Memory safety
               | is part of that, but there's a lot more to it.
               | 
               | So, for example, while Rust does not guarantee the lack
               | of memory leaks, it does make them relatively hard to
               | produce by accident in the first place. This is due to
               | the intersection of a few different parts of Rust's
               | overall design.
        
               | didgetmaster wrote:
               | I have heard that rust can cause tetanus, which is not
               | good for the brain.
        
               | taejo wrote:
               | Rust itself cannot cause tetanus but it can include
               | unsafe blocks which can activate tetanus spores by FFI.
        
         | boesboes wrote:
         | I'm with you. My earliest memory is from my second birthday.
         | Not many, if any, other memories from that early though
        
           | tzs wrote:
           | How do you know that is where you got the memory? Early
           | birthdays can be tricky because it is common for families to
           | record them on video and if you saw such a video a few years
           | later that could create a memory that you would think was
           | from the birthday itself.
           | 
           | Personally I don't trust most memories I have from before
           | around 4 because my parents had around 20 reels of home
           | movies from that time and I know that I saw several of those
           | movies a few years later.
        
             | aeonik wrote:
             | I fell off a countertop and got a concussion when I was
             | 2.5, it's a very vivid and painful memory. I also moved to
             | a different state when I was 5.
             | 
             | I have a very clear delineation of before and after the age
             | of 5, and I have hundreds of memories from before the move.
             | Most are rather intense events, but I even remember the
             | layout of my house, construction sites, my daycare,
             | neighbors, friends houses, holidays, first bike ride, first
             | lizard I caught, my pets, even some dreams I had, etc...
             | 
             | I didn't have a good idea of time yet, but I can
             | retroactively tell when things occurred based on facts I
             | later learned, like when certain neighbors moved, even my
             | sister was born, etc...
        
             | boesboes wrote:
             | We didnt have anything to film with & there are no pictures
             | from that day. I remember only a specific moment: we went
             | to pick up my grandpa and i recall the shirt he was wearing
             | very precisely.
             | 
             | I can't guarantee that the memory is genuine, but it is
             | very specific and I had to reconstruct my age from
             | discussing the memory with my mom.
        
         | sndinsmd wrote:
         | Because -- and this is true -- you absolutely don't.
         | 
         | You can be continue to be frustrated being incorrect, or you
         | can accept that you're lying to yourself and move on.
         | 
         | It's that easy. Human memory just doesn't work like that.
        
           | popalchemist wrote:
           | Ontologically, you can not say that definitively, you can
           | only say that op's claim is highly unlikely. Only OP knows
           | what OP knows and no amount of theory can disprove it, nor
           | can any theory lay greater claim to ontological accuracy than
           | he can.
        
             | goatlover wrote:
             | OP only knows it if OP can verify having memories from that
             | age. People can be wrong about their memories. Memory
             | fabrication does happen.
        
               | TeMPOraL wrote:
               | I'd go as far as saying, memory fabrication happens all
               | the time - we recompute our memories when we reference
               | them, and that result is affected by all the other
               | experiences and memories we accumulated between
               | subsequent recalls. Or, in other words, humans _always
               | confabulate_ (in the exact same sense as LLMs  "always
               | hallucinate", and I'm invoking this comparison on
               | purpose) - the difference between "correct" and "false"
               | memory is a matter of degree.
        
             | datavirtue wrote:
             | This.
        
             | irjustin wrote:
             | > Only OP knows what OP knows and no amount of theory can
             | disprove it,
             | 
             | This isn't true either. Memories themselves are non-
             | falsifiable. So no matter what we either side says we'll
             | literally never know the truth.
        
               | gwd wrote:
               | One side says, "I remember this thing from when I was 1
               | year old".
               | 
               | Another says, "You cannot remember it, you must have
               | reconstructed it from being told or from pictures."
               | 
               | The memory itself can certainly be falsified: if you
               | remember your mom using an iPhone in 1998, then that
               | memory is false. If you remember talking to your uncle
               | but he died before you were born, the memory is false.
               | 
               | How do we know if the origin of the "memory" is the
               | person's actual experience, or their imagination of it
               | based on descriptions or pictures?
               | 
               | Well if it's an event that had pictures taken of it, if
               | it's the _kind_ of event which grown-ups talk about, then
               | the simplest explanation is that it was reconstructed.
               | 
               | But my son, almost 5, is always coming out with random
               | things that happened when he was 1 or 2, which are
               | absolutely of no importance to us, and which we would
               | have forgotten long ago if he didn't keep remembering
               | them. Once, for example, my wife put a pair of his shoes
               | on top of the car while she put him in the car seat,
               | forgot they were there, and drove off -- obviously at
               | some point they fell of and were completely lost. Every
               | six months or so my son talks about that incident
               | completely unprompted -- something of absolutely no
               | significance to us, but obviously something that struck
               | him. And about the time I lost my temper and sprayed him
               | in the face with water -- definitely not a memory I'm
               | eager to revisit and bring up.
               | 
               | Someone dogmatic person may still say, "You must be
               | bringing that up yourself somehow." _That_ is certainly
               | an unfalsifiable assertion -- there 's no way, other than
               | my assertion and probability, to prove that I'm _haven
               | 't_ talking about those shoes on a regular basis. But I
               | think any person with an open mind is likely to agree
               | that "he's remembering them" is a more likely scenario
               | than "the grownups are talking about those lost shoes all
               | the time".
               | 
               | Probably these "revisitations" are his brain's way of
               | refreshing the memory as his brain grows, which probably
               | means the memory as they exist in his brain will have
               | been shifted over the years. But that's still an original
               | memory -- that's how adult memories work as well.
               | 
               | If at any point he misses a "refresh", they'll probably
               | be gone; but the memories he manages to do this for will
               | probably stay with him into adulthood. If at any point he
               | "misses" a refresh, they'll probably be gone forever.
               | 
               | The flip side of this, of course, is that many of the
               | memories we think we have as adults are heavily edited
               | too. A few years ago someone recounted to me an emotional
               | conversation that they'd had with someone on their
               | deathbed (as an adult, only a few years prior to that).
               | As it happens, I was in the other room when this
               | conversation happened, and my memory of that conversation
               | was significantly different. Obviously at least one of us
               | is "remembering" something untrue. As I had little "skin
               | in the game" about the content of the conversation, and
               | the memory this person has seems to me very consistent
               | with this person's narrative about their life, I'm
               | inclined to think my memory is more accurate. But who can
               | tell.
        
               | xyzzy_plugh wrote:
               | This matches my experience also. Kids can "juggle" some
               | of these extremely early memories into more permanent
               | memories but the vast majority are dropped. It's only
               | because of the early and possible frequent recall that
               | the memories end up winning their mythic permanence.
        
           | plasma_beam wrote:
           | I am mid-40s and have several distinct memories from 2.
        
           | lightedman wrote:
           | I absolutely have memories of when my father's dog attacked
           | me at the age of 11 months old.
           | 
           | And the scars.
        
             | intrasight wrote:
             | I have lots of memories from 1yo on.
             | 
             | I will say that my strong early memories are of things that
             | were either very positive or very negative.
             | 
             | Any scientist studying memory who doesn't have early
             | memories just has a bad memory.
        
           | AlchemistCamp wrote:
           | You can't know that.
           | 
           | I had memories as a toddler that I confirmed after meeting my
           | mother for the first time in decades a couple of years ago.
           | Specific things about where I lived, events that had happened
           | and how someone else in our family had died. I had another
           | conversation with an aunt that confirmed other things,
           | including a word from another language that I knew from when
           | I was little but didn't realize wasn't a made up word.
           | 
           | Memory is fallible and we have an imperfect understanding of
           | it, but I know for a fact from personal experience that
           | people can remember events from very early in life if the
           | emotional impact is deep enough.
        
             | Washuu wrote:
             | I have the same experience confirming memories with my
             | parents. A few years ago they finally got garbage pick up
             | service again and mentioned it to me.(Tiny area, roughly
             | 1,000 people, so that service was not feasible until
             | recently.) To which I replied, "Oh yeah, it's been like, 30
             | years since you last had it." They asked how I knew that.
             | "I remember you carrying me up the driveway to drop the
             | dirty diapers in the bin." They were both surprised that I
             | remembered that and could confirm it.
             | 
             | However, the time that a giant plate glass mirror fall off
             | a wall at a department store and crashed through me when I
             | was about two years old? No idea. My parents had to tell me
             | about that one later in life.
        
           | deadbabe wrote:
           | I have a rather traumatic memory of crying endlessly while I
           | was getting a professional photo taken, I was less than 2
           | years old.
        
             | xutopia wrote:
             | I believe you. I have a few memories around my second
             | birthday. People are often impressed with my recall of
             | people and places. I have reasons to believe because of
             | corroborations later in life that my memories were true.
        
           | eszed wrote:
           | I genuinely do have at least one memory from the age of two,
           | because it was a completely banal event that no one told
           | stories about (my grandmother moved to a new office, lol),
           | nor certainly photographed, that I (because I remembered it)
           | assumed had taken place when I was three. Turns out (crowd-
           | sourced family chronology agreed, and documentary proof later
           | corroborated) took place either 5 or 6 months after I turned
           | two. (Memories differed as to the exact month, and the
           | earliest letter we had was from the corroboratory year, but
           | from a couple of months after when she would have moved.)
           | 
           | The matter came up because some time when I was in my
           | twenties I said, _apro pos_ of something or other,
           | "[grandma] moved to [office] in year X", and they said "No,
           | it was year X-1", and I said "well how come I remember
           | [mundane sense-memory detail], if I was only two?" And they
           | said, "yeah, [detail] is correct, but it was definitely year
           | X-1", rinse-repeat, until they set out to prove me wrong
           | about the year, which it turned out I was, which was a win
           | for them, but then both I and my aunt with PhD in child-
           | development were forced to conclude that I had a memory from
           | when I was two.
           | 
           | Yeah. It blew my mind, too. I didn't think human memory
           | worked like that, either.
           | 
           | Something-something only a Sith deals in absolutes.
           | Alternatively, don't be such a jerk to that other guy. It's
           | not really within the HN ethos.
        
           | gwd wrote:
           | Why do you think you know that? How would you know if you
           | were wrong?
        
           | strictnein wrote:
           | One of the most ridiculous comments I've ever seen on HN, and
           | that's saying something.
        
           | helboi4 wrote:
           | You are way over confident. I definitely have memories from 2
           | onwards and I know I remember them because I remember
           | relaying them to people at age 4 onwards, by which point my
           | memory was very well formed.
        
         | SubiculumCode wrote:
         | Around 2 tends to be the earliest limits that have been
         | confirmed. Memory scientists don't claim that no memory
         | persists from infancy, its just that it hasn't been confirmed,
         | and there's lots of evidence of infants failing to remember
         | events from months back in infant memory experimental
         | paradigms, and highly plausible scenarios of memory
         | reconstructions, from pictures, or from stories.
        
           | datavirtue wrote:
           | Absolutely no way to study this.
        
             | rightbyte wrote:
             | Let a 6 month old play with a green or red ball.
             | 
             | 5 year later show the same two balls and say you will give
             | the kid an ice cream if it picks the same color. Obviously
             | give the ice cream no matter the pick ...
             | 
             | Look for correlation.
        
         | anonymousiam wrote:
         | Heh. I've got memories from ages two and three that are pretty
         | solid, and there were not photos or other records to prompt
         | them. Some people really can do this. Some of my early memories
         | were "filled in" by later experiences when I learned something
         | that "explained" the earlier memory, and it was then
         | reinforced, but the early memories are independent from the
         | later ones.
         | 
         | My earliest memory was President Kennedy's assassination, but
         | of course I had no idea of what a president was, life, death,
         | etc. I was 16 months old. What I do remember was a bunch of
         | strange people in and out of the house with the TV on and
         | everyone very concerned, but what I remember most of that day
         | was that it was the day I learned how to shake my crib and move
         | it around the room while I was inside. I remember my parents
         | not liking the fact that I was able to do that. I've never
         | discussed that memory with them, and they're both gone now, so
         | I never will.
         | 
         | I've got memories from when I barely knew how to talk, and
         | didn't understand what the people around me were saying. My
         | memory isn't good enough to decode what was said after I
         | learned the language. I can clearly remember sitting in my high
         | chair eating Alphabet cereal, and trying to make words with the
         | letters I had not yet learned. I get sad when I think about how
         | my parents would brush me off, probably thinking that I was too
         | young to learn much. (My parents were both school teachers!)
        
         | gsich wrote:
         | You wouldn't know the difference.
        
         | ryanjshaw wrote:
         | When was the last time you updated your brain OS? My
         | rememberory format changes every couple of years.
        
         | tomw1808 wrote:
         | I also sometimes have memories before 3, but mostly I am
         | sleeping.
         | 
         | However, on rare occasion, people send me pictures where I am
         | awake at 3, but I have no memories.
         | 
         | Sorry folks, I see myself out, that was inappropriate, I hope
         | nobody will remember.
        
         | strictnein wrote:
         | Same. I'm always kind of shocked when people don't. My wife
         | hardly remembers anything before she was 8.
         | 
         | We moved a couple months before I turned three and I have a
         | bunch of memories that predate that. I remember being potty
         | trained and lying to my parents about it so I could get a
         | treat. I remember my dad coming home from the family farm and
         | having injured his hand on some machinery. I remember stealing
         | a pack of orange gum from the grocery store and chewing it all
         | up underneath the piano in our basement. I could keep going and
         | going.
         | 
         | My earliest memory was before I was two. Somewhere around 19-20
         | months. I know this because I had an ear infection and that's
         | when it occurred. I'm sitting in my crib, crying due to the
         | pain in my ear, and screaming "mom" at the door in the room.
         | The room is mostly dark, but the door has been left open a
         | crack to let in a little bit of light. From my vantage, looking
         | through the slats in the crib, the door is open on the left. My
         | mom comes in once, finally, and then leaves.
         | 
         | I also feel like I have an earlier one, being carried in a room
         | which may have been my nursery, looking down on a changing
         | table. I'm pretty sure I'm being held by my father, but I can't
         | say for certain that this is real.
        
       | xeonmc wrote:
       | I wonder if it has to do with the snapshot timing resolution
       | being asymptotically high when you have not yet experienced
       | enough passage of time.
       | 
       | As you know we generally experience timescales logarithmically
       | with age, i.e. your incremental experience of time is always
       | compared in reference to dividing by the total passage of time
       | experienced, which is why children tend to get bored much more
       | quickly than adults, because waiting for ten minutes constitutes
       | a much larger percentage of their current experienced life
       | compared to that of an adult's proportion.
       | 
       | Since a baby/toddler has only experienced a tiny amount of time
       | passage thus far, their tiny reference "yardstick" would result
       | in their memory being snapshotted at an untenable timining
       | resolution thanks to division-by-almost-zero. So perhaps the
       | brain does some form of filtering to prevent the entirety of
       | experienced memory being dominated by the super-early ages, or
       | perhaps there is some equivalent of an overflow in their internal
       | counter.
       | 
       | Keep in mind that the above are purely metaphorical as a
       | functional description, and not to be treated as a literal
       | hypothesis on the mechanistic operation of memory.
        
         | roenxi wrote:
         | An interesting idea; although I think somewhat unlikely. This
         | is one of those instances where I would assume the brain is
         | doing something carefully calibrated. But it'd be easiest to
         | just not record as many experiences for the first few years
         | rather than do a complete flush.
         | 
         | My guess has always been there is some optimal approach to
         | learning that works by developing a really basic schema (what
         | does a person look like, which ones are mine, roughly how does
         | this body thing work, etc) then flushing all the training data
         | and starting again. I vaguely expect the machine learning
         | people develop some sort of similar process where they get a
         | lot of value lightly conditioning a model before sinking
         | compute into doing a full train.
         | 
         | Basically, my wild guess is there is a lot to learn in a baby's
         | first few experiences but the risk of mis-encoding the lessons
         | is so high that the brain uses the data to bootstrap but then
         | throws it out as too unreliable and starts again once it
         | orients.
        
         | 29athrowaway wrote:
         | I disagree.
         | 
         | I think the brain compresses experiences.
         | 
         | If you had a routine of k activities every day you won't
         | remember every instance of that routine but you may remember
         | what the routine was.
        
           | IncreasePosts wrote:
           | Exactly what I was going to say. Go travel through strange
           | lands for 3 months and compare the feeling of the passage of
           | time to 3 months doing your normal routine.
        
           | alabastervlog wrote:
           | N of 1, but my experience doesn't fit with this common
           | explanation. Big life changes, travel, _having kids_... none
           | of it has done a thing to disrupt a steady progression to a
           | point where (around age 40) a year feels about subjectively
           | as long as maybe three months did in high school. Started
           | being noticeable around age 25 IIRC, and time 's done nothing
           | but keep getting faster. This doesn't revert, at all, when
           | things get shaken up, not even temporarily. It's still "you
           | know that place we went the other day... oh, shit, that was
           | six weeks ago".
        
         | close04 wrote:
         | > which is why children tend to get bored much more quickly
         | than adults, because waiting for ten minutes constitutes a much
         | larger percentage of their current experienced life compared to
         | that of an adult's proportion
         | 
         | I think boredom is the brain's hunger more than its watch. It's
         | about the needs of a developing brain, rather than plain time.
         | 
         | Right after the bulk of neurogenesis the brain goes into
         | synaptic pruning where it strengthens some synapses and
         | eliminates others. Developmental pruning is experience
         | dependent and the scale of the process in childhood needs a lot
         | of experiences to fuel it.
         | 
         | Those experiences are literal "food for thought". Building the
         | body takes more food, building the brain takes more
         | experiences.
        
       | sema4hacker wrote:
       | I've always found two things interesting about memory. First, it
       | often seems many more memories can be stored than recalled. This
       | becomes apparent when you can't remember something to the point
       | of being certain you've forgotten, only to later recall what you
       | were trying to remember. (My definition of a good trivia question
       | is one you can't answer until you're told the answer and you
       | realize you knew all along.) And of course people who have the
       | ability to apparently remember everything indicate memory
       | capacity can be enormous.
       | 
       | Second, I've often thought I can correctly remember a scene from
       | a movie or TV show I saw decades ago, but when I see it again I
       | realize I got a tremendous number of details wrong, indicating
       | that particular stored memory is very general in nature and not
       | accurate at all.
        
         | DecentShoes wrote:
         | Re trivia, I often find myself thinking "I would have
         | definitely gotten that if it was multiple choice".
         | 
         | I agree with your second paragraph too. I often think of a
         | certain tone of voice or pacing with which a line was
         | delivered, and it ends up being completely different when I
         | rewatch it. And yet there are still Mandela Effect people out
         | there insisting their memories are 100% infallible and it's
         | more likely there's a global time travel conspiracy to change a
         | dot on a KitKat package than that they misremembered something
         | small.
        
       | dboreham wrote:
       | Because the apparatus for remembering is emergent, derived from
       | accumulated training data. Only when the person's brain has gpt-2
       | level training data is what we call memory available. Of course
       | actual memory as in persistent storage, is there from before
       | birth.
        
       | Nasrudith wrote:
       | I figured the reason why we cannot remember such a part of our
       | lives is because our brains grew enough that the 'memory' neuron
       | groups wound up converted to 'network connections', the
       | connection and this is pretty much a result of a geometric
       | constraints. Theoretically we could have a process of the brain
       | relocate the memories before conversion, but it was probably
       | selected against because it would increase calorie consumption by
       | 5%.
        
       | viccis wrote:
       | >There is debate between memory experts as to the role of
       | language in infantile amnesia. Human researchers suggest memories
       | may be limited by an inability to give language to early
       | experiences. "But there must be something more fundamental that
       | also plays a role because we see this same [infantile amnesia]
       | effect in non-linguistic animals like rats," says Prof Rick
       | Richardson of the University of New South Wales.
       | 
       | That opposition doesn't quite make sense to me. If you are
       | examining the linguistic view of it, then what we're talking
       | about is that memory requires symbolic understanding. Not just
       | language (a fairly sophisticated symbolic tool), but also just
       | the ability to schematize your various sensory impressions into
       | conceptualized objects. My earliest memory is sitting in a high
       | chair playing with Duplos (large Legos for young children) being
       | frustrated that I couldn't connect two pieces. That requires a
       | few concepts such as a high chair, the tray sitting in front of
       | me, the pieces I was playing with, and emotions like anger.
       | Symbolic understanding isn't necessary for any of that to happen,
       | but it does seem necessary to store it for recall decades later.
       | 
       | The problem with comparing this to rat memory is that I'm not
       | convinced that rats have anywhere near the same kind of symbolic
       | understanding, so how can they be compared to humans in this
       | capacity? Rats can remember things, but babies can also be taught
       | sign language starting at around 6 months, which seems much
       | closer to rat memory (the direct linking of a perception with an
       | emotion, unmediated by a symbolic transformation).
        
       | colechristensen wrote:
       | I had a friend who swore she had memories from before she could
       | speak, like remembering specific events with extreme frustration
       | about not being able to express herself.
        
         | card_zero wrote:
         | Same here: she wanted to say to her mother "give me that cup
         | back for a minute, I only wanted to look at the interesting
         | pattern that's on it".
        
       | jkic47 wrote:
       | could it be that memory must require language as a predicate?
       | Without language, how does one "record" the memory?
        
         | forgotoldacc wrote:
         | There are people without internal monologues, and most people
         | can also visualize something and remember scenery without
         | words. There are also animals that (likely) don't have language
         | that apparently have memories.
        
         | tasty_freeze wrote:
         | My dog sometimes buries a bone when we give him one. Later he
         | digs it up and chews on it some more. He forms a memory of
         | where he buried it without the use of language (I'm pretty
         | sure).
        
         | drhagen wrote:
         | From experience, I am skeptical of this hypothesis. Little kids
         | will absolutely recall memories from before they knew how to
         | speak.
         | 
         | Just last week, my two-year-old spied the freezer pops in
         | storage. She pointed out back and said, "Eat on deck!" Clearly,
         | she remembered eating freezer pops on the deck, but the last
         | time she did that was last summer (northern hemisphere) when
         | she didn't know how to talk at all, let alone say "deck".
        
         | sudosteph wrote:
         | That's interesting, because my earliest memory was wordplay
         | related. Though I doubt I could have strung a sentence together
         | at the time, there were definitely words involved. I have a few
         | relatively early memories, but none that are totally pre-
         | language.
        
         | o11c wrote:
         | I can't counterexample the first half, but my only vivid memory
         | from being a 2-year-old is primarily visual (though it does
         | involve surprise at the reality contrasting with a prior
         | description in words).
        
         | gsich wrote:
         | No, you can also remember physical activity.
        
         | somenameforme wrote:
         | Animals have no meaningful language but clearly have memory.
         | Also the separation between thinking and language becomes quite
         | clear as you learn another language and realize that asking
         | what language you think in is not such an easy question to
         | answer.
        
         | ThinkingGuy wrote:
         | In her autobiography, Helen Keller describes memories from her
         | childhood, before she was taught to communicate, so it would
         | seem language isn't necessarily a prerequisite for memory
         | formation.
        
         | crooked-v wrote:
         | > Without language, how does one "record" the memory?
         | 
         | The same way one rides a bicycle without telling themselves to
         | balance and operate the brakes.
        
       | mannyv wrote:
       | Are they remembering a memory or a memory of a memory? And in the
       | end is there any difference?
       | 
       | I took lots of pictures of my kids. Those pictures trigger
       | memories, but it's unclear if they would have remembered those
       | things without the pictures. And there's no real way to tell if
       | those memories are real, or just narratives attached to the
       | trigger.
       | 
       | It's interesting to think about.
        
         | intrasight wrote:
         | All memories after the first recall is a memory of a memory.
         | And after second recall, it's a memory of a memory of a memory.
         | And so on. That's how the hippocampus works.
        
       | sirsinsalot wrote:
       | My mother was shocked when I recalled the bathroom tiles, layout
       | and song she sang to me when I was a baby. There's no photos of
       | the bathroom, it wasnt discussed as its refit was banal. The song
       | she sang, she never mentioned to me past being a baby.
       | 
       | As an adult I have very good visual and audio memory, as well as
       | perfect pitch. They're not as useful as they sound.
       | 
       | Make of that what you will.
        
       | datavirtue wrote:
       | I remember a lot of my toddler years. I also remember coming out
       | of what, looking back, feels like a dream-like state that was
       | much simpler emotionally and cognitively but had almost a
       | hallucinogenic feel before "waking up" as a toddler.
        
         | dsego wrote:
         | I believe I remember trying to say a word and being frustrated
         | that parents wouldn't wait and gave up just as I was about to
         | utter the sounds, or something along those lines, it's really a
         | vague memory of having a memory at this point.
        
       | ipv6ipv4 wrote:
       | Memories aren't an objective tape recording. Memories are the
       | brain's model of the world. You spend your life refining your
       | model of the world. Your earliest memories were initial rough
       | approximations (misinterpretations, if you will) that are later
       | superseded by better (more predictive) approximations. So you
       | forget (they don't activate as predictions) the old inaccurate
       | (less predictive) memories in favor of the newer (more
       | predictive) memories.
        
       | prngl wrote:
       | If we go a bit old-school on AI and reason in the "connectionist"
       | framing:
       | 
       | Let's say neural memories are encoded in some high-dimensional
       | vector space.
       | 
       | And so memory recall is an associative process that entails
       | constructing a query vector and issuing it across the neural
       | memory space.
       | 
       | And the brain is constantly learning, and that learning entails
       | some changes in the structure of the high-dimensional memory
       | space.
       | 
       | And let's say that re-encoding of a neural memory happens upon
       | recall, and only upon recall.
       | 
       | Then it could be that all experience is in fact stored, but
       | because of changes due to learning, those memories become
       | inaccessible. The machinery constructing query vectors has
       | updated its structure enough that its encoding of those query
       | vectors is sufficiently dissimilar from the encoding of the
       | stored memory vectors (which use the encoding from the last
       | recall).
        
         | qudat wrote:
         | I like this while including the brain regularly does "cleanup"
         | of connections that it deems unnecessary and removes them.
        
         | username135 wrote:
         | I like this one
        
         | naderraider wrote:
         | this appears to be more or less what happens.
         | (https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/science.ade6530)
        
           | memhole wrote:
           | On re-encoding memories as well:
           | 
           | https://www.jneurosci.org/content/32/35/12144
           | 
           | Oops, someone else posted this further down too. Great minds
           | think alike!
        
         | spwa4 wrote:
         | Also known as "catastrophic interference" or "catastrophic
         | forgetting" ... No all that catastrophic unless it balloons,
         | but it's a name that stuck.
         | 
         | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catastrophic_interference
        
         | perfmode wrote:
         | Cool
        
         | suddenlybananas wrote:
         | Doesn't really explain why it happens universally and why this
         | doesn't happen after other major changes in lifestyle (people
         | who move to a radically different country don't lose all
         | memories of their life beforehand).
        
           | llamaimperative wrote:
           | From the brain's POV even a radically different country is
           | like 99.9% the same as anywhere else on earth.
        
             | suddenlybananas wrote:
             | Sure, but is the difference between being 2 and 4 really
             | that profound? It's not like the memories that are lost are
             | just of the womb.
        
               | llamaimperative wrote:
               | Uhhh yes.
               | 
               | Age 2: Can point to their own body parts; hold something
               | in one hand while doing something with the other hand
               | 
               | Age 4: Changes behavior based on where you are; can draw
               | a person with more than 3 distinct body parts
               | 
               | There's a _huuuge_ amount of learning that happens
               | through this period. Your brain is learning things like
               | 3-dimensional space, temperatures exist and I don 't like
               | some of them, I-have-two-arms, things fall when dropped,
               | I must engage my big toe to stay upright while walking,
               | other people appear to have feelings, other people appear
               | to believe that I appear to have feelings.
               | 
               | And in any case, the difference between 2 and 4 is only
               | relevant to the question of whether a 4 year old can
               | remember being 2, not what this article is about, which
               | is _adults_ not remembering being  <4.
        
               | suddenlybananas wrote:
               | >There's a huuuge amount of learning that happens through
               | this period. Your brain is learning things like
               | 3-dimensional space, temperatures exist and I don't like
               | some of them, I-have-two-arms, things fall when dropped,
               | I must engage my big toe to stay upright while walking,
               | other people appear to have feelings, other people appear
               | to believe that I appear to have feelings.
               | 
               | Many of those things are completely innate. Walking for
               | example, while people use the word "learn" in casual
               | speech, is something that is innate. I just don't think
               | the original comment is well-grounded in what we know
               | about infant's cognition. And in any case, a 2 year old
               | definitely understands 3D space.
        
               | llamaimperative wrote:
               | ... walking absolutely must be learned... They will
               | _automatically learn it_ without explicit teaching but
               | indeed it must be learned. A child prevented from
               | standing or walking for 5 years and then stood on their
               | feet for the first time _will not_ be able to walk.
        
               | suddenlybananas wrote:
               | That is simply not true. There are many cultures which
               | greatly restrict infants' ability to move (e.g.
               | traditional rural communities in Northern China or the
               | Ache in Paraguay) and the children in these communities
               | _still_ learn how to walk. Not only that, but the basic
               | neural mechanisms that are used in walking are innately
               | specified (central pattern generators), not learnt (https
               | ://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S09594..
               | .). Now, there is a degree of "fine-tuning" that is
               | learnt that makes the walking more fluent and precise,
               | but the basic principles of walking are innate.
               | 
               | One only needs to see a foal walking less than an hour
               | after birth to be convinced of this.
               | 
               | Part of the problem is that humans are born _so_
               | premature that people confuse natural maturation with
               | learning. Just as we don 't _learn_ puberty, we don 't
               | _learn_ how to walk.
        
               | llamaimperative wrote:
               | Which cultures completely restrict their infants from
               | attempting to walk?
               | 
               | Did you read the paper you linked? It describes all the
               | immense amount of learning that actually happens: https:/
               | /art.torvergata.it/retrieve/e291c0d4-b584-cddb-e053-3...
               | 
               | > One only needs to see a foal walking less than an hour
               | after birth to be convinced of this.
               | 
               | Have you actually seen a foal walking? They are _very
               | visibly_ learning how to do it!
        
               | suddenlybananas wrote:
               | >Which cultures completely restrict their infants from
               | attempting to walk?
               | 
               | The ones I mentioned in my comment.
               | 
               | >Did you read the paper you linked? It describes all the
               | immense amount of learning that actually happens.
               | 
               | Again, as I said, there is a degree of fine-tuning but
               | the core mechanisms are innate.
               | 
               | Some examples:
               | 
               | > In particular, the core premotor components of
               | locomotor circuitry mainly derive from a set of embryonic
               | interneurons that are remarkably conserved across
               | different species
               | 
               | >Detailed EMG recordings in chick embryos during the
               | final week of incubation showed that the profiles of EMG
               | activity during repetitive limb movements resemble those
               | of locomotion at hatching
               | 
               | > In addition, human fetuses exhibit a rich repertoire of
               | leg movements that includes single leg kicks, symmetrical
               | double legs kicks, and _symmetrical inter-limb
               | alternation with variable phase_.
               | 
               | I don't think you read the article, or else you think
               | that "development" means learning.
               | 
               | >Have you actually seen a foal walking? They are very
               | visibly learning how to do it!
               | 
               | They can walk right away, but they get better at it. It's
               | innate, but you can fine-tune it. Like I said.
               | 
               | Another (impressive) example of an animal innately
               | walking, this time to avoid predators immediately after
               | hatching https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3OjfK0t1XM
        
               | SamoyedFurFluff wrote:
               | I think your definition of innate is counter to the
               | common definition of innate. The common definition of
               | innate is that there is no thought behind full
               | understanding and capacity to perform- for example,
               | snakes do not generally need to learn how to move without
               | legs or how to open the mouth large enough to consume big
               | food. There isn't a try/fail cycle while they understand
               | the capacities of their body. I fed my pet snake a baby
               | quail for the first time in its life and it clearly had
               | to learn how to eat it (tried and spat out the leg, wing,
               | etc) even though the core mechanism of big mouth big
               | swallow is there was clearly innate in it. Just because
               | there is a core mechanism to walk existing in babies
               | doesn't mean the baby doesn't still need to learn how to
               | perform the behavior voluntarily, on command, consciously
               | according to their own will.
        
               | suddenlybananas wrote:
               | What you just described for the baby applies equally to
               | the snake. It's obviously difficult to neatly segment
               | things into innate and non-innate, but the idea that
               | walking is a matter of maturation rather than "learning"
               | is the mainstream view among scientists and has been for
               | a century.
               | 
               | Again, I conceded that you have to "fine-tune" to get
               | good at walking. But the contrast that with say, playing
               | golf. That's something that categorically has to be
               | learnt, we don't see fetus practicing their drive in
               | utero.
        
               | watwut wrote:
               | They do not keep them tied till they are 5 years old.
        
               | suddenlybananas wrote:
               | That's just being pedantic. They also don't "learn" to
               | walk if their legs are cut off.
        
               | llamaimperative wrote:
               | No, that is actually exactly what I was describing. If it
               | was _innate_ , they wouldn't need to trial and error
               | their way (i.e. learn) to proficiency. But indeed they
               | do.
               | 
               | Your analogy was puberty, which in fact happens with
               | development _regardless_ of trial and error (i.e.
               | learning).
               | 
               | The two developmental processes are clearly distinct. The
               | distinction is that one is a process of learning and the
               | other is not.
        
               | suddenlybananas wrote:
               | I'm talking about being able to walk, you're talking
               | about being proficient. I've said repeatedly that fine-
               | tuning to get better is not incompatible with innateness.
        
               | ecshafer wrote:
               | Have you spent a lot of time with children?
               | 
               | My 2 year old went on a mental breakdown of a temper
               | tantrum last night because she saw an apple on the tv,
               | decided it meant she wanted an apple, and couldn't
               | understand why she could not have an apple despite seeing
               | one on the tv just then! A toddler is still trying to
               | understand how reality itself works.
               | 
               | A 4 year old knows that jumping off of the stairs onto
               | tile is going to hurt. A 4 year old understands the apple
               | on the tv is an apple on the tv and is not a physical
               | apple in the house.
               | 
               | They are so far apart.
        
               | suddenlybananas wrote:
               | Obviously a 4 year old is much more together than a 2
               | year old. But we're talking about a fundamental
               | difference so great that no memories can be preserved.
               | That's a high bar.
        
         | dist-epoch wrote:
         | We know there is massive prunning and "dropout" of brain
         | connections during young age.
        
         | tralarpa wrote:
         | > The machinery constructing query vectors has updated its
         | structure enough that its encoding of those query vectors is
         | sufficiently dissimilar from the encoding of the stored memory
         | vectors (which use the encoding from the last recall).
         | 
         | Wouldn't that result in very bizarre memories instead of no
         | memories?
        
           | phantompeace wrote:
           | Not unless the brain does filtering (something we know for
           | sure it does - psychedelics mess with this filter). I may be
           | completely off the mark though
        
           | mystified5016 wrote:
           | The brain is sufficiently complex that I'd expect gross
           | distortions will get swept under the rug. You'd get either
           | lightly distorted memories (dad is 18ft tall, mom's face is
           | wrong, favorite toy lived in this spot instead of that one)
           | or nothing at all. If a memory is totally corrupted, your
           | brain won't give it to you because it doesn't pass your
           | perceptive filters.
           | 
           | Children believe a lot of silly things that they "grow out"
           | of thinking.
           | 
           | How sure are you that your childhood memories are accurate?
           | How sure are you that you aren't simply conditioned to ignore
           | distorted childhood memories?
        
       | thrill wrote:
       | Odd. My first memory turned out to be when I described in later
       | years to my mother from when I was just over a year old.
        
       | AndrewDucker wrote:
       | Your brain is constantly changing, and much moreso when you're
       | young. Imagine that you're trying to load files from a previous
       | version of a piece of software into the current version - when
       | the format is just a binary dump and nobody has been working on
       | backwards compatibility.
        
       | sim7c00 wrote:
       | i could never remember a lot far back until an incident caused
       | some more recent years to disapear from memory. now i have some
       | memories of when i was a baby but not from my teenagw years. i
       | think its all in there, paging it in is just practically
       | impossible to do on demand. maybe some people can do it though..
        
         | johnohara wrote:
         | Your page-swap analogy is apt and razor sharp. Well done.
        
         | biofox wrote:
         | I had a similar experience when deeply intoxicated, I saw a
         | shadow that reminded me of the texture of the wallpaper in the
         | first home I grew up in -- it unlocked a cascade of memories
         | from my early childhood (I must have been 2) that I never would
         | have been able to recall otherwise. But I can't remember what I
         | had for breakfast yesterday.
        
         | taurath wrote:
         | What you're describing is dissociation, if you're looking for a
         | word! Its effects are not as well known and it's under-
         | appreciated how common it is. Plus having 3 different societal
         | definitions really makes the concept difficult to talk about.
         | 
         | I've done a lot of work on this myself and one can connect with
         | one's parts, if that model seems accurate to you.
        
         | somenameforme wrote:
         | Another fun one on this example is somebody after coming out of
         | a coma being effectively fluent in a foreign language.
         | Obviously the person had to have at least some familiarity with
         | it before, but there are countless cases where somebody goes
         | from knowing a few words of a language (presumably having
         | forgotten everything they learned in school or whatever) to
         | suddenly speaking it, more or less, fluently. Similar incidents
         | can also completely change a person's accent and have other
         | such interesting effects.
         | 
         | There's almost certainly some way to tap into this without
         | (what is usually/always) brain damage, which has interesting
         | implications for the long-term future of education.
        
       | jack_pp wrote:
       | Could be that we don't really replay memories as toddlers and
       | memory sticks by spaced repetition. When I have weeks where a ton
       | of stuff is happening I don't remember a lot of the details even
       | now at 30 because there's too much for me to repeat
        
       | account-5 wrote:
       | I can't remember the vast majority of stuff before I was 2-3 but
       | I remember seeing my younger sibling when they were bought home,
       | there's less than a year between us. And I can remember a few
       | other things earlier, they they are definitely fuzzier.
        
         | dsego wrote:
         | I also believe I have several distinct memories from around 1
         | or 2, but it's not clear that they are real and not just
         | confabulations. I probably have bigger gaps in primary school,
         | things faded away.
        
           | dijit wrote:
           | Frustratingly, a lot of what we think are memories are in
           | fact: us remembering remembering.
           | 
           | Human memory is increasingly fallible with time because of
           | this.
           | 
           | It's like playing chinese whispers with our own recollection,
           | everything is a copy of a copy of a copy.
           | 
           | It makes sense that you would remember distinct events, but
           | the trouble here is that nearly all memory as you so
           | eloquently described, is "just confabulations"- which feels
           | wrong instinctively, until it's challenged scientifically.
        
             | taurath wrote:
             | Some fact or visual memory is as that, but our memories are
             | also made up of sensory sensations and emotional states,
             | and combinations abound. In fact, a big part of what makes
             | PTSD is a split off different aspects of a remembered event
             | because it's so difficult to process the whole experience.
             | This takes place after a traumatic event, during attempts
             | at memory consolidation.
             | 
             | Also traumatic memory seems to be stored differently than
             | day to day memory, which helps explain that triggers and
             | flashbacks are valid and real (for traumatized ppl), while
             | the confabulation effect can also exist. Though I'd note
             | that confabulation can happen but that doesn't mean it
             | "overwrites" the old memory, or that confabulation is in
             | any way more common than just remembering a part or a whole
             | event.
        
             | throwayaw2 wrote:
             | I have some pretty intense trauma in my life that I can
             | recall extremely vividly even though i have little memory
             | of the weeks surrounding the event. Often when I don't even
             | want to. Certain memories are true memories.
        
           | ben_w wrote:
           | I have some from "shorter than a table" age (I can no longer
           | rember even which year), which later turned out to have been
           | dreams from before I knew the difference between them and
           | reality.
        
           | alexjplant wrote:
           | I remember a handful of insanely specific things from this
           | age that I've since verified with my parents - I generally
           | don't seem to misremember or fabricate memories. That being
           | said there are a _lot_ of things that I require prompting via
           | photo or video to remember and probably 90% of my life from
           | that time is unrecoverable. I vividly recall random moments
           | from family functions and some intense nightmares but the
           | family dog, for instance, is a complete black hole. Weird
           | stuff.
           | 
           | Primary school is still knocking around but I think I (and
           | many others) suppress it to retain their sanity in adulthood
           | :-P
        
         | globular-toast wrote:
         | I had an illness as a child which meant I was in and out of
         | hospital for a while. I have a few very fuzzy memories from
         | this time. The earliest, I think, was when my grandparents had
         | come to the hospital. All I can remember is the _feeling_ of
         | the situation. They were all worried. I 'm not even sure if I
         | could talk at the time. I'm certain this memory is real because
         | nobody has ever talked about this; it's not really a notable
         | event for anyone else involved.
         | 
         | I also remember getting transported to Great Ormond Street in
         | the night. I remember going in the back of a strange car (taxi?
         | Hospital transport?) with a tartan blanket. I also remember
         | being given a suppository, something that I didn't believe was
         | actually real until about 20 years later (people don't really
         | talk about them).
         | 
         | But I can't remember at all whether my siblings were there or
         | not. I'm 2-3 years older than my brothers but in my memory they
         | were just _always there_.
        
           | Carrok wrote:
           | > it's not really a notable event for anyone else involved.
           | 
           | I'm sorry but, what? You think your extended family visiting
           | a child in a hospital due to illness was not a notable event
           | for them?
           | 
           | > They were all worried.
           | 
           | As a parent I can assure you it was a notable event, or no
           | one would have been there, and they would not have been
           | worried.
        
             | globular-toast wrote:
             | Erm... OK, but I've actually, you know, talked to my
             | parents about this during the decades since. Nobody
             | remembers this particular event because it was one night
             | out of weeks of things getting bad, then worse, before
             | finally getting better. This was almost certainly not the
             | only time the grandparents visited, but it's the only one I
             | remember.
             | 
             | Adults' memories don't just play out like a recording
             | either. They remember many other details that wouldn't have
             | been shared with me even if I could have understood it.
        
       | feverzsj wrote:
       | Because the transceiver(brain) hasn't been ready to connect with
       | the real you in another dimension.
        
       | sachahjkl wrote:
       | I literally have memories from when I was 4. Same clarity as new
       | memories.
        
         | codeulike wrote:
         | _researchers have long puzzled over our inability to recall
         | events before two or three years of age_
        
       | BriggyDwiggs42 wrote:
       | Maybe the issue is that at that age we haven't yet learned
       | compressions for our memories. Maybe at that age our best option
       | would be storing something closer to raw experience because we
       | don't know enough about the world. Eg we might remember a chair
       | as "brown, lots of orthogonal lines, about my size" rather than
       | using our experience of other chairs.
        
         | randcraw wrote:
         | Yeah, I think the first chair we observe is the template for
         | recognizing other chairs later. Surely that 'seed' chair will
         | undergo substantial revision in time as we become aware that it
         | wasn't the ideal basis on which to base our modeling of all
         | chairs to come, and we unconsciously 'normalize' the model for
         | chair in our head (and adjust that memory too).
         | 
         | It stands to reason that this happens to all of the baseline
         | models for the referents we learn (nouns, verbs, adjectives,
         | etc) that subsequent learning surely reshapes.
         | 
         | This is likely comparable to the revision of 'concept' clusters
         | that goes on in all unsupervised learning NN models, especially
         | in humans, those that arise pre-linguistically (since words
         | surely provide landmarks to memories enabling future
         | retrieval). Perhaps we rewrite our early word2vec tables,
         | making early memories less retrievable.
        
       | codeulike wrote:
       | _Why can 't HNers remember to read the article?_
       | 
       | There's actually some quite suprising stuff in that article, e.g.
       | some cultures have earlier childhood memories than others, and
       | there's some interesting suggestions as to why that is. Also
       | considerations about how early events can apparently be stored
       | but not consciously remembered.
        
         | ben_w wrote:
         | > Why can't HNers remember to read the article?
         | 
         | To quote:
         | 
         | """NEW YORK, NY - A recent study showed that 70% of people
         | actually never read more than the headline of a science article
         | before commenting and sharing. Most simply see a headline they
         | like and click share and make a comment. A recent study showed
         | that 70% of people actually never read more than the headline
         | of a science article before commenting and sharing. Most simply
         | see a headline they like and click share and make a comment.
         | 
         | Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet..."""
         | 
         | - https://thesciencepost.com/study-70-of-facebook-
         | commenters-o...
        
           | aithrowawaycomm wrote:
           | The most frustrating iteration of this is when someone uses
           | an article to make a point in an argument...and they didn't
           | read it! A clickbait headline seems to support their claim,
           | but the substance refutes it.
        
       | gadders wrote:
       | This looks like they listened to the BBC Crowd Science Podcast
       | (recommended FYI) a week earlier and re-wrote it:
       | https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/w3ct5rjf
        
       | tracker1 wrote:
       | I don't remember everything, but I definitely have a handful of
       | memories from when I was a toddler (2-3yo). Such as when my
       | sister was born.
        
       | pafry wrote:
       | Related: https://supermemo.guru/wiki/Childhood_amnesia
        
       | InDubioProRubio wrote:
       | But you can? You just reproduce the situation and a strange sort
       | of deja vu returns? Take a ball- really badly, then grasp it with
       | ever better technique and more precision, until you arrive at
       | your grasping skills of today.
       | 
       | Same goes with chewing on things - and the first taste of
       | anything.
        
       | vanderZwan wrote:
       | The cultural impact on childhood memory is interesting, but I
       | have to say that the first paragraph was a bit off-putting, like
       | it was written by someone who should pay a bit more attention to
       | the actual experience of their child in order to support them
       | through these formative years instead of projecting their own
       | adult frustrations on them:
       | 
       | > _Life must be great as a baby: to be fed and clothed and
       | carried places in soft pouches, to be waved and smiled at by
       | adoring strangers, to have the temerity to scream because food
       | hasn't arrived quickly enough, and then to throw it on the ground
       | when it is displeasing. It's a shame none of us recalls exactly
       | how good we once had it._
       | 
       | Babies are also almost completely unable to move around by
       | themselves and are constantly frustrated by their lack of agency.
       | They are extremely vulnerable and utterly dependent on the
       | kindness of their parents and other older humans in their
       | environment. They lack language so have no other way of
       | communicating than screaming, which is often also a cause of
       | great distress because of an inability to communicate a basic
       | need (and on that note, even knowing what those needs are half of
       | the time, given that the ability to make sense of ones own senses
       | is still being developed).
       | 
       | All of this while life is a nonstop series of first experiences,
       | meaning that even the most mundane thing can (and often is)
       | surprising, confusing and overwhelming, leading to a high need
       | for reassurance, because being scared and wanting to make sure
       | that you're really safe is honestly a very sensible reaction to
       | have when you add all of those things up.
       | 
       | I'm not saying life sucks for babies and toddlers, but as a
       | parent of a two-year old myself it's pretty obvious to me that
       | it's no walk in the park for them either.
        
         | KolmogorovComp wrote:
         | It seemed obvious to me that part was tongue-in-cheek and not
         | to be taken literally. It's quite common to get readers to be
         | 'hooked'.
        
           | vanderZwan wrote:
           | Perhaps. I've seen enough selfish parents voice this
           | sentiment unironically to no longer give people that benefit
           | of doubt.
        
             | the-grump wrote:
             | Not perhaps. It's 100% tongue-in-cheek.
        
               | bluebarbet wrote:
               | The word "perhaps" was an attempt to de-escalate a verbal
               | confrontation that is unproductive because neither
               | assertion is falsifiable.
        
               | the-grump wrote:
               | The idea behind human and artificial communication
               | converging was that computers would learn human patterns,
               | not that humans would start describing obvious humor with
               | logical terms like falsifiable.
               | 
               | You're on the wrong side of Poe's law.
        
           | danielscrubs wrote:
           | Assume the readers are dumb and in the meantime Huberman is
           | in top 10 of most popular podcasts of all time.
           | 
           | Journalists and their great education is the more likely
           | culprit.
        
         | amanaplanacanal wrote:
         | I'm pretty sure it was an attempt to be humorous.
        
         | tessierashpool9 wrote:
         | My guess is that the author was looking for a reason to use the
         | term "temerity" and built the statement around this desire.
        
         | Clubber wrote:
         | >Babies are also almost completely unable to move around by
         | themselves and are constantly frustrated by their lack of
         | agency. They are extremely vulnerable and utterly dependent on
         | the kindness of their parents and other older humans in their
         | environment. They lack language so have no other way of
         | communicating than screaming, which is often also a cause of
         | great distress because of an inability to communicate a basic
         | need
         | 
         | Funny, the same things happen when you become elderly, minus
         | the screaming mostly.
        
           | Yossarrian22 wrote:
           | Having been to nursing homes and assisted living facilities I
           | think that's mainly due to drugs.
        
             | hibikir wrote:
             | Yep, you'd be surprised by how many turn downright violent
             | when unmedicated. Sometimes the violence is a big part of
             | the reason why the family ended up having to send them to a
             | nursing home.
        
           | vanderZwan wrote:
           | > _Funny, the same things happen when you become elderly,
           | minus the screaming mostly._
           | 
           | You just unlocked a memory of me reading "The Praise of
           | Folly" in my teens for literature class and having my mind
           | blown by the passage talking about that:
           | 
           | > _Yet abating from this, let us examine the case more
           | narrowly. Who knows not that the first scene of infancy is
           | far the most pleasant and delightsome? What then is it in
           | children that makes us so kiss, hug, and play with them, and
           | that the bloodiest enemy can scarce have the heart to hurt
           | them; but their ingredients of innocence and Folly, of which
           | nature out of providence did purposely compound and blend
           | their tender infancy, that by a frank return of pleasure they
           | might make some sort of amends for their parents ' trouble,
           | and give in caution as it were for the discharge of a future
           | education; the next advance from childhood is youth, and how
           | favourably is this dealt with; how kind, courteous, and
           | respectful are all to it? and how ready to become serviceable
           | upon all occasions? And whence reaps it this happiness?
           | Whence indeed, but from me only, by whose procurement it is
           | furnished with little of wisdom, and so with the less of
           | disquiet?_
           | 
           | > _And when once lads begin to grow up, and attempt to write
           | man, their prettiness does then soon decay, their briskness
           | flags, their humours stagnate, their jollity ceases, and
           | their blood grows cold; and the farther they proceed in
           | years, the more they grow backward in the enjoyment of
           | themselves, till waspish old age comes on, a burden to itself
           | as well as others, and that so heavy and oppressive, as none
           | would bear the weight of, unless out of pity to their
           | sufferings._
           | 
           | > _I again intervene, and lend a helping-hand, assisting them
           | at a dead lift, in the same method the poets feign their gods
           | to succour dying men, by transforming them into new
           | creatures, which I do by bringing them back, after they have
           | one foot in the grave, to their infancy again; so as there is
           | a great deal of truth couched in that old proverb, Once an
           | old man, and twice a child._
           | 
           | > _Now if any one be curious to understand what course I take
           | to effect this alteration, my method is this: I bring them to
           | my well of forgetfulness, (the fountain whereof is in the
           | Fortunate Islands, and the river Lethe in hell but a small
           | stream of it), and when they have there filled their bellies
           | full, and washed down care, by the virtue and operation
           | whereof they become young again._
           | 
           | > _Ay, but (say you) they merely dote, and play the fool: why
           | yes, this is what I mean by growing young again: for what
           | else is it to be a child than to be a fool and an idiot? It
           | is the being such that makes that age so acceptable: for who
           | does not esteem it somewhat ominous to see a boy endowed with
           | the discretion of a man, and therefore for the curbing of too
           | forward parts we have a disparaging proverb, Soon ripe, soon
           | rotten?_
           | 
           | > _And farther, who would keep company or have any thing to
           | do with such an old blade, as, after the wear and harrowing
           | of so many years should yet continue of as clear a head and
           | sound a judgment as he had at any time been in his middle-
           | age; and therefore it is great kindness of me that old men
           | grow fools, since it is hereby only that they are freed from
           | such vexations as would torment them if they were more wise:
           | they can drink briskly, bear up stoutly, and lightly pass
           | over such infirmities, as a far stronger constitution could
           | scarce master. Sometime, with the old fellow in Plautus, they
           | are brought back to their horn-book again, to learn to spell
           | their fortune in love._
           | 
           | (I obviously had to look it up, it's not like I had this
           | memorized after a quarter century)
           | 
           | I don't think Erasmus was right about the elderly growing
           | blissfully happy with losing themselves to dementia, but then
           | again: the book was satire, so we shouldn't expect Folly to
           | be sincere in their arguments.
           | 
           | [0] https://www.gutenberg.org/files/30201/30201-h/30201-h.htm
        
         | arkey wrote:
         | That's some very good insight, often difficult to remember, but
         | constantly having all of this in mind should definitely help a
         | bit with managing the day to day of parenting.
        
         | apwell23 wrote:
         | > frustrated by their lack of agency
         | 
         | uh.. how do you know this? doubt they even know what agency is
         | or lack of it means.
        
           | HumblyTossed wrote:
           | Observed behavior. It's not hard to recognize feelings in
           | one's child if one pays close enough attention.
        
           | rootlocus wrote:
           | I can tell you 100% my toddler gets extremely frustrated when
           | he can't do something by himself. And it wasn't a brusque
           | development, babies get frustrated when they want to turn on
           | the side and can't. Also, they're extremely joyful when they
           | finally manage to do it on their own, and they'll do it
           | constantly.
           | 
           | > doubt they even know what agency is
           | 
           | I doubt some people know what epicaricacy is, but they do it
           | anyway.
        
             | apwell23 wrote:
             | comment wasn't talking about toddlers
        
         | helboi4 wrote:
         | Yeah I always think being a baby or toddler must be endlessly
         | frustrating. Imagine having absolutely no words to communicate
         | your need and no idea how to do anything. I've said this before
         | to parents of babies when I was a curious teenager and they
         | thought I'm being silly but I'm sure it actually is stressful.
         | At the end of the day we all go through it and nobody remembers
         | it though, so it's not worth worrying about, it's just
         | interesting to think about.
        
           | bombcar wrote:
           | You can actually watch the progression as the baby realizes
           | "Wait, that's a thing you can do" through "I wonder if I can
           | do that" to "darn it, it's not working" and finally to "wow I
           | did it".
        
         | crooked-v wrote:
         | > They lack language so have no other way of communicating than
         | screaming
         | 
         | This is one of those good reasons to teach babies basic sign
         | language (https://www.parents.com/what-is-baby-sign-
         | language-5115901).
        
           | steve_adams_86 wrote:
           | Teaching my kids sign language was such an eye-opener. Prior
           | to that I was totally oblivious to how smart babies are. I
           | guess I assumed that they developed speech somewhat in time
           | with their understanding of language. This couldn't be
           | further from the truth though. There's a huge gap. Maybe I
           | was especially clueless; I didn't grow up around babies, so
           | this stuff might be obvious to people who did.
        
           | sebasvisser wrote:
           | Also be sure to start at age 0, don't wait until 6 months.
           | Signing and talking to your baby from day 0 about what you
           | are doing and why brings them so much comfort. And gives them
           | the opportunity to develop so much more quickly and
           | confidently.
        
         | __s wrote:
         | Indeed, my father's earliest memory is when he was a baby &
         | couldn't talk. His two aunts, quite young at the time, were
         | joking around with him, having taken him out of the stroller &
         | moving him around recklessly. He identified at that point he
         | was a toy to them
        
         | gehwartzen wrote:
         | All of what you describe is probably a big part of why we don't
         | remember. Not only has the though encoding/decoding process not
         | been developed sufficiently to remember things in the way we do
         | when older but even if we did those memories would probably be
         | horrific for the most part.
        
         | breakbread wrote:
         | I remember listening to some NPR segment where a
         | doctor/researcher said the first couple years is like a long
         | acid trip. He was being somewhat tongue-in-cheek, but it
         | resonated with me.
        
       | jiohewrfkopwefr wrote:
       | > Life must be great as a baby: to be fed and clothed and carried
       | places in soft pouches
       | 
       | Not really. Genital mutilation is very barbaric and traumatising
       | procedure. Most victims suppress it, and develop all sorts of
       | mental issues. Victims have very high suicide rate!
       | 
       | One of the reasons we can not remember our early lives. It was a
       | horror!
        
         | 2rsf wrote:
         | Can you support the claims starting from "Most victims"?
        
       | westcoast49 wrote:
       | We attach our early memories to our concept of the world as it
       | was then. Afterwards, our concept of the world changes. As a
       | result, those old memories sort of become dangling pointers. They
       | refer to a world model that no longer exists in our minds.
        
         | baggy_trough wrote:
         | Yes, it's like not being able to remember your dreams, or
         | things when you're too drunk.
        
           | jraph wrote:
           | > it's like not being able to remember your dreams
           | 
           | That's just aggressive garbage collection happening when you
           | wake up, arguably so you don't risk confusing dreams and
           | reality :-)
           | 
           | But you can somewhat partially work around it by taking notes
           | right after waking up, before doing anything else.
        
             | momento wrote:
             | You know you're on HN when people refer to neurology in
             | terms of pointers and garbage collection.
        
               | jraph wrote:
               | Yep. Of course, one needs to adapt the speech to the
               | audience :-)
        
         | randcraw wrote:
         | And as an infant our world was incredibly smaller than our
         | world is now. Surely the 'principal components' of that day
         | were reshaped or subsumed by other pointers later, thereby
         | shifting the landmarks used to retrieve memories.
         | 
         | I would hazard a guess that the original pointers aren't
         | revised to point nowhere, but are, if possible, moved to point
         | into the revised reference model. (Presumably we do this now
         | when we learn a new domain like music, and as the model for
         | harmony becomes more concrete, our original pointers to
         | elements within it are adjusted rather than lost.)
        
           | westcoast49 wrote:
           | I think it happens to a certain extent, if we do as the
           | article says, and revisit our memories. We then probably
           | reinterpret our memories in the context of our new and
           | updated understanding of the world.
           | 
           | In other cases I believe it's quite possible that our
           | understanding of the world, say at age two, is so radically
           | different from our adult understanding, that the old memories
           | don't even make any sense in the new context. They can't be
           | remapped in any meaningful manner.
        
       | ryao wrote:
       | I have memories dating back to the day I was born. I was
       | incredibly bored as an infant, so I played a game I invented
       | where I would replay all of my memories on a regular basis. It
       | turned out that my game was essentially a spaced repetition
       | method. The result is that I did not forget, while others did.
        
         | osrec wrote:
         | What do you remember of the day you were born? How did you
         | validate your memories?
        
           | ryao wrote:
           | My parents and I later discussed them. Anyway, I remember the
           | room where they put children after they were born. Everything
           | was white except for what was really close. A nurse that I
           | had assumed at some point to be a relative kept putting this
           | annoyingly warm cap on my head that I struggled to remove. I
           | even tried pushing myself up once to look around, but I saw
           | nothing and the effort was exhausting, so I did not try it
           | again even though I contemplated doing it. It turns out that
           | my grandparents were watching through the window from the
           | hospital hallway and witnessed that, which I later heard
           | after I recounted the story.
        
             | osrec wrote:
             | Wow, that's really quite something!
        
         | pingou wrote:
         | If that study is correct
         | https://www.jneurosci.org/content/32/35/12144.abstract,
         | considering the number of times you must have recalled them,
         | what you remember must be significantly different than what
         | happened, especially since you were probably missing a lot of
         | understanding as an infant.
        
           | ryao wrote:
           | It is not that significantly different, although my poor
           | understanding certainly left people with that impression. I
           | thought the nurse in the hospital on the day I was born was
           | an aunt. As a young child, I would later describe my baptism
           | at 9 months of age as being dunked. It was not that I meant
           | that I was literally dunked into the water. I simply thought
           | the sensation of water dripping to the back of my head was
           | being dunked. I also had been terrified during my baptism
           | since I thought the deacon was trying to drown me. My parents
           | were so thrilled that I was not crying like the other
           | children while in reality, the reason I was silent was
           | because I terrified about actually being immersed into water
           | and drowned. That said, at the time, I did not really
           | understand how to disambiguate what I had regarded to be
           | dunking from immersion, even though I had the faint concept
           | that the air supply could be severed by being immersed in
           | water, which is why I had been terrified.
           | 
           | I recall one time when I was around 2 years old and my
           | parents took me to Pizza Hut. When asked about toppings and
           | hearing that we could have three, I said I wanted extra extra
           | extra cheese. They thought I was being cute. However, I had
           | no concept of cuteness or how to be it. I simply wanted all 3
           | toppings to be extra cheese and to my disappointment, 2 of
           | the toppings were not. At the time, I had not known how to
           | say 3 toppings of extra cheese and I thought repeating extra
           | three times would communicate what I wanted.
           | 
           | That said, I stopped playing my memory recall game around age
           | 5 when I began to be bullied and did not want to remember the
           | past anymore. That left me with far fewer memories from early
           | grade school than I had from prior years. It also let many of
           | my early memories fade, although not enough for me to forget
           | them entirely.
        
             | Feathercrown wrote:
             | > However, I had no concept of cuteness or how to be it.
             | 
             | My memory isn't as good as yours, but you just reminded me
             | of this fairly distinct feeling. As a child you're being
             | earnest; only as an adult do you see that as being cute.
        
         | arkey wrote:
         | I have a few memories that my parents have placed at around me
         | being 2. I would say they have also remained through
         | repetition, but in my case not active or voluntary. Those
         | memories, although very vivid and specific (I can pinpoint them
         | as specific events), are mostly attached to senses (something I
         | saw, something I smelled). And because I continued to have
         | those inputs during several years later, I guess the memories
         | were thus persisted.
        
         | RIMR wrote:
         | If you can remember all the way back to the day of your birth,
         | those memories are surely not real memories. Newborn babies are
         | essentially not fully conscious - not in a way that would
         | create any long-term memory of lived events anyway.
         | 
         | It sounds to me that this memory-recall game likely started
         | when you were a toddler or preschooler rather than an infant,
         | and that while this may give you additional reach back into
         | your earliest memories, it was likely more a game of creativity
         | than genuine memory recall. Into adulthood the real memories
         | and the invented ones can end up feeling roughly the same.
         | 
         | Unfortunately there's really no way to test the accuracy of
         | your memory aside from comparing your memories to a previously
         | unobserved but concrete record. For most of us, our childhood
         | was documented by our parents, and the stories shared with us
         | over the course of our lives, so there's no way to prove that
         | even the accurate recollections weren't simply our memories of
         | the stories rather than the events themselves.
         | 
         | Humans have poor memory anyway. We misremember things that
         | happened recently, so it is probably unwise to trust your
         | memory of things that distant as being accurate, especially
         | when they reach back to an age where most established science
         | suggests that you wouldn't have even possessed self-awareness.
        
           | ryao wrote:
           | It started at some point after my birth when I still
           | remembered my time in the hospital and given that I later
           | successfully recounted events from that day, that my
           | grandparents witnessed, to my parents, it is safe to say that
           | my memories are accurate. Your assumption that I was not
           | conscious is absurd. Maybe you were not conscious, but I was.
           | I was a very precocious child.
        
             | jfax wrote:
             | A newborn's eyes are not focussed.
        
               | ryao wrote:
               | That would explain why everything was white except really
               | close things like the nurses' hands. The nurses' hands
               | were the only color other than white that I recall seeing
               | that day. I had some awareness of the crib's walls (or
               | whatever that thing was), but beyond that, I saw nothing
               | but bright white light.
        
         | ddingus wrote:
         | I have memories way back. Not quite infant, but somewhere
         | between 1 and 2 years old, I started to string it together.
         | 
         | One trigger was fear of sleep. How do I know I wake up the same
         | person? Seems silly right? Well, past me without a whole lot of
         | experience was really concerned. I can remember a ton after
         | that time.
         | 
         | What I find really interesting is both of us made some active
         | choice to remember. Like we ended up with self awareness really
         | early.
         | 
         | For me, it was mostly about unanswered questions. I have
         | memories that are strongest from that time:
         | 
         | One was flicking the spring in my crib. Swoosh doing, doing,
         | da,da,doing! That is me earliest one.
         | 
         | Why does it bounce like that? And the noise! If I flick one
         | today, on one of those
         | 
         | Another was a trip to the neighbors. Their kid was named Cash.
         | That is what we call money! WTF is with that?
         | 
         | Cash took me to play down stairs and they had a ton of nice
         | stuff down there. Fencing for a ring of thieves. I recalled
         | enough to nail them many years later to which my mom confessed
         | they moved to get away from those people. Lol.
         | 
         | Another was this big bee. I looked at it and bet I was faster
         | and stomped! Ouweeeee! The need died, but also totally stung
         | me. Was not faster. Ugh. Boy, I can recall our porch, welcome
         | mat, bright clear summer day, that bee and my foot going down.
         | . I have more. Turning on the TV was vivid. Old tube one made
         | noises as it came up. And smells. I recall it like it was
         | yesterday.
         | 
         | Anything intriguing and I go into record mode. Everything about
         | that time gets saved. Where I was who I was with, happenings...
         | 
         | I was afraid I might forget and never learn the thing one
         | learns on one of those.
         | 
         | I still do it. Not as often now due to experience, but if it is
         | really new to me, I will feel that switch and off it goes.
        
         | rightbyte wrote:
         | To the day you were born sounds extreme? Does a baby even
         | 'see'? Your game as a kid makes the concept kinda believable in
         | some sense though. But I have a hard time believing that early?
         | 
         | I have quite a lot of early memories. More than usual. And I
         | remember that I remembered more early stuff when I was a child
         | but I have no recollection of my first year now and only really
         | vague and maybe indirect memories of my second year.
        
           | ryao wrote:
           | Everything except things up close was white. If I had to
           | guess, I could not see further than a foot if that (although
           | when I first was able to talk, I had thought the distance had
           | been 3 feet or less). I did try looking around once after
           | making great effort to push my torso upward, but everything
           | was white and it was exhausting. I wanted to make another
           | attempt but did not muster the will to exert myself again.
           | The only color I could see aside from white was the nurse's
           | hand when she annoyingly reached into the crib (or whatever
           | it was called) to put some uncomfortably warm thing onto my
           | head. My hands did not work very well so I had to nudge it
           | off my head each time using them as blunt instruments. To my
           | relief, she gave up after a few times.
           | 
           | Interestingly, my grandparents had witnessed all of this.
           | Later, when I could speak and asked my mother why my aunt
           | kept putting something on my head one day when I was younger,
           | she recalled what my grandparents had told her and told me it
           | was the nurse on the day I was born. I had not realized it
           | had been the day I was born until she told me. At the time I
           | could speak to ask about it, I simply had regarded it to be
           | when I was very young.
        
             | ryao wrote:
             | To be clear, I had no idea that various early memories were
             | from my first year until I talked to my parents about them.
             | The memories that have been dated to my first year are:
             | 
             | * The time in the room where newborn children are placed.
             | The events here were witnessed by my grandparents and told
             | to my parents.
             | 
             | * The remnant of my umbilical cord falling off my belly
             | button at my aunt's house. That really hurt.
             | 
             | * My baptism. I had misunderstood the water as a prelude to
             | being drowned and was terrified that the deacon wanted to
             | kill me.
             | 
             | I assume that there are more memories from my first year,
             | but since they do not correspond to something others
             | witnessed and remember, there is no way of dating them to
             | that year.
             | 
             | In the case of the first two, I had asked my parents about
             | them when I could talk and they realized that I was
             | recalling very early memories. In the case of my baptism,
             | my mother had decided to recount my baptism talking about
             | happy she was that I had been the only well behaved child
             | there (the Catholic Church often baptizes children in
             | batches). Upon hearing that, I remembered the event and
             | responded complaining that I had only been quiet because I
             | thought if I had opened my mouth to cry, I would have been
             | drowned to death soon afterward. What was a fond memory for
             | her was a horrific memory for me.
        
               | rightbyte wrote:
               | The concept is interesting. I think the awareness of
               | babies might be underestimated.
               | 
               | > I had misunderstood the water as a prelude to being
               | drowned and was terrified that the deacon wanted to kill
               | me.
               | 
               | Sounds like a rationalisation way later though? I don't
               | think you could be aware of either concept at the time.
               | Like, the fear of the priest as a stranger, or fear of
               | the other babies screams from pouring water on their
               | heads. Not the concept of drowning or killing.
        
               | Feathercrown wrote:
               | Isn't drowning one of the few things that babies
               | instinctually fear?
        
               | ryao wrote:
               | It was a deacon and I was not afraid of him. I was afraid
               | of being drowned. I probably had some prior notion of
               | drowning from being bathed by my mother. She was a very
               | results oriented person that did not have any idea that
               | the details of how you do things are important. It is
               | almost certain that she accidentally got water in my nose
               | at some point (possibly multiple times), which made me
               | acutely aware of the notion of drowning. It is a memory
               | that I likely elected to forget, although traces likely
               | remained, which likely caused my fear during my baptism.
               | 
               | Coincidentally, I have had a lifelong aversion to putting
               | my head below water. It made learning to swim impossible.
        
               | sakopov wrote:
               | My goodness, this is fascinating! Thank you for sharing!
        
       | 47282847 wrote:
       | For something incredible, read about the methods developed by
       | some Hungarian child psychologists to strengthen the bond to
       | children even before they are born:
       | https://www.taylorfrancis.com/books/mono/10.4324/97810033318...
        
       | scotty79 wrote:
       | Synaptic pruning?
        
         | scotty79 wrote:
         | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Synaptic_pruning
        
       | tomatocracy wrote:
       | One of my earliest memories is not of an actual event/place but
       | of a nightmare I had. Given the tendency to forget dreams very
       | quickly I've always wondered how common retaining memories of
       | dreams from early childhood is - eg I've never heard anyone else
       | mention this when talking about early memories.
        
         | mattmcknight wrote:
         | I do have memories of a nightmare from age 4-5, but it was a
         | recurring nightmare.
        
       | fjfaase wrote:
       | I once hear the story of a colleague who when going to college
       | met with someone who he felt that he knew although they were
       | unable to establish were they knew each other from as they came
       | from different cities. When he returned home and told the story
       | to his mother, she smiled and told him that they as toddlers had
       | met.
        
         | 0xEF wrote:
         | I had a psych professor with a similar story that she liked to
         | share. Her prevailing hypothesis on why we don't remember our
         | infancy was that there's typically little to no reason to
         | recall it, so the memories either fade or morph into general
         | feelings and emotions that often help form the bases of our
         | early personalities.
         | 
         | I may be getting some of that wrong, too. I was not
         | particularly engaged with that class since I was still a rather
         | immature student, back then. I'm not saying I subscribe to her
         | idea, but it's certainly interesting to think about.
        
           | Clubber wrote:
           | I've read a hypothesis that it's because when you learn to
           | speak, you remember things in a new way. You don't know how
           | to access the memories you stored before you knew how to
           | speak.
        
             | mediumsmart wrote:
             | Absolutely - "Tree" is so much easier to file than the
             | magic thing standing there before you.
        
           | smogcutter wrote:
           | In other words, you've forgotten the class for the same
           | reasons you've forgotten being an infant.
        
         | barrenko wrote:
         | Once in college I had a girl stare at me for a while on a long
         | distance bus (we were almost the only passengers in there).
         | When I got home my mom told me her mom called her to ask if I
         | was also on that bus - apparently we have spent a lot of time
         | together as toddlers.
        
         | madaxe_again wrote:
         | I have had this experience firsthand - I met someone at a
         | party, and he was _intensely_ familiar, despite me being on the
         | far side of the planet from my usual haunts. We chatted, and it
         | transpired quite rapidly that we had been neighbours and
         | frequent playmates as toddlers in Hong Kong.
         | 
         | Having had a child of my own in the last few years, I would
         | like to think I understand the phenomenon. When we lack
         | comprehensive language, we do not store memories as narrative
         | experiences as we do as adults, rather just as semantic
         | connections and correlations. There have been more than a few
         | occasions where I have been doing something like changing a
         | diaper, rocking her to sleep, playing with her in the bath, and
         | I have had the intense sensation of "I remember what this felt
         | like" - not necessarily a specific instance, but rather a
         | remembrance of sensation.
         | 
         | My earliest memories are from between one and two years of age,
         | and I know that they are memories as they are things that my
         | parents do not recall, and I have been able to verify, and I
         | know when they are from as we left Hong Kong weeks after my
         | second birthday.
         | 
         | I remember the father of the guy I reconnected with parading
         | around his garden on stilts - my parents denied this ever
         | happened, yet he confirmed his father was indeed into that at
         | the time - and I remember the pigs and chickens under the
         | houses in the squatter's village near us - again, my parents
         | insisted they had never taken me there - and they had not, but
         | my au pair, who forty years on I reconnected with and asked,
         | had.
         | 
         | There are other bits and bobs, glimpses, that I recall, but
         | can't say for sure aren't implants.
        
         | gradschool wrote:
         | Your comment reminded me of the documentary "Three Identical
         | Strangers" [1], about identical triplets adopted by different
         | families during their first months of life who try to re-
         | establish their connection when they meet later by chance. It's
         | a gripping story with a shock ending. Somewhat relevant to this
         | thread and I hope not too much of a spoiler, it's suggested in
         | the film that they may have been affected by separation
         | anxiety.
         | 
         | [1] https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7664504/
        
       | miftassirri wrote:
       | i remember i was crawling as a child
        
       | Raztuf wrote:
       | It's crazy that people here have memories from when they were
       | toddlers while I'm 29 and have a hard time remembering stuff from
       | my early teens.
        
         | nelblu wrote:
         | I am with you. That said, I feel like looking at a photo when I
         | was very young say around 4 or 5 does seem to invoke memories
         | about the house I grew up in. I wonder if the brain is just
         | making up the memory or the photo is actually helping the brain
         | access some dormant region in the brain.
         | 
         | Further, I have also noticed that when I meditate sometimes my
         | mind wanders and brings me some memories from the childhood -
         | totally random, unrelated to current events memories.
        
         | busterarm wrote:
         | I drank heavily from my early teens to my late-twenties. Like
         | full-blown alcoholism.
         | 
         | I can't remember many things from that decade+, but more
         | significantly my sense of when things happened that I do
         | remember is usually off by years.
        
         | helboi4 wrote:
         | I have memories from my whole life but only smatterings of
         | them. When I say I have memories from being as toddler it's
         | like a few here and there.
        
         | wat10000 wrote:
         | I have a decent memory for places, so-so for people, very
         | little for events. I could draw a reasonable floor plan of my
         | childhood home and tell you about friends and family who were
         | there. But I could only tell you about a handful of things that
         | happened in that place.
         | 
         | It's not much better in more recent times. I could say much the
         | same about everywhere I've lived as an adult.
        
       | kittikitti wrote:
       | Our culture is predicated on the inability of infants to
       | remember. The overwhelming majority of newborn infant boys have
       | their genitals mutilated and the medical community claims that
       | they will have no knowledge. When stakes are this high, we don't
       | want them to remember.
        
       | Levitz wrote:
       | My earliest memory is about awareness of conscience and memory.
       | 
       | I remember laying in bed, my diapers being changed, I don't know
       | who was doing it or what the room looked like at the time, but I
       | remember that there was nothing before that, and that on
       | following days I thought back to that moment with the conviction
       | that it was important for me to remember that specific moment,
       | since it was the first for me.
        
         | apwell23 wrote:
         | you prbly just made an educated guess
        
         | thornewolf wrote:
         | I have a similar experience. "A conviction to remember". I was
         | a bit older though and playing with my toys.
        
         | darkhorn wrote:
         | Same awakening moment happened to me. I was in the edge of a
         | big bed and I was not able to move. And there were (our)
         | wardrops on the other side of the room (later they were moved
         | out). I remember that there was notning much to remember before
         | that and I realized that I was small and new in this world.
        
       | nashashmi wrote:
       | I have been able to recall memories from the time I was one years
       | old. I even recalled a dream I had at the age of 3. These
       | memories were long forgotten and probably the last time I
       | recalled them was at the age of 7. I am now 40.
       | 
       | Recently, I unlocked a memory at the age of 2 months. It is
       | difficult to believe except to me. After unlocking it, the memory
       | felt like it was yesterday. And I have recalled this memory
       | multiple times in my childhood phase. I guess I am now recalling
       | my childhood in greater detail which is causing me to remember
       | what memories I was recalling at the time.
       | 
       | So why can't we remember our baby memories? Because of shock. The
       | present day gives us so much stress. So we focus on now. We focus
       | on what helps us now. We recall memories that help us in the NOW.
       | If you want to recall a memory from before, imagine a stress that
       | likely would have also occurred from before. Like being hungry
       | and being unable to communicate. And reaching for a bottle of
       | milk. Being unable to walk or crawl. Lying on your back. For me,
       | hunger does not evoke too much stress. Other things do like
       | headaches.
        
         | stef25 wrote:
         | So it's like a built-in protection to prevent us from recalling
         | traumatic experiences ? Could make sense. But then why also
         | block the overwhelmingly good memories like getting xmas
         | presents ?
        
           | asdff wrote:
           | I don't think you can put logic on what you do and don't
           | remember from an event. Biology would have to mate that with
           | some contextual reasoning somehow which seems a bit to
           | complex for something so inherently subconscious. For example
           | when I think of some family vacations from childhood I can
           | remember deep details about staring out the car window at
           | some place, but as for the fun things we actually did there I
           | am at a loss and have to be reminded by family.
           | 
           | I guess all that is to say you can't seem to be in control of
           | when the tape player starts recording and you can't reliably
           | find your old tapes.
        
         | Supermancho wrote:
         | My earliest memory is age 2, which was a traumatic one. Being
         | wheeled through the double doors into the surgery areas, while
         | my mom had to wait outside and was assuring me we would get
         | Taco Bell after.
         | 
         | Age 3. My father assembling a solid plastic child riding horse
         | with springs.
         | 
         | Age 4. A residential home converted to child day care, where I
         | first encountered Cosmic Encounter on a table (probably left
         | out from the night before). I had no idea what that was until
         | my teens.
         | 
         | Age 4-6, a rather large number of memories like beginning to
         | formally write with my left hand, almost choking on a sea shell
         | I had been sucking on, Jimmy Carter was president, my first
         | memorable Halloween, etc. All at a Kindercare facility, which
         | is a national pre-school chain.
        
       | resters wrote:
       | I remember back to age 2, fwiw.
        
       | kingofheroes wrote:
       | The earliest memory I have, that I actually consider a memory and
       | not just a weird dream, is a sensation of feeling very warm and
       | comfortable and then suddenly feeling very cold and upset and
       | wanting to go back to the warm place. I'd like to say this was a
       | memory from when I was born, but I honestly have no clue when
       | this happened as I couldn't see anything. I think the reason this
       | memory stuck with me was just the stark contrast between "this is
       | nice" to "this sucks, put me back".
        
         | yu3zhou4 wrote:
         | Same here! My wife did some research recently and it seems like
         | some people really have a memory of this sensation
        
         | BoiledCabbage wrote:
         | I'm curious - could you describe one of the weird dreams your
         | had from earlier then this? It'd be interesting to know.
        
       | rtkwe wrote:
       | So many of my early memories feel almost 3rd person because I
       | mostly remember them as the stories told. Mostly around injuries
       | I had as a kid though I know the memories are at least a little
       | warped because the way I "remember" laying while I was getting
       | stitches in my hand would mean it was on my left hand but I have
       | the scar on my right hand. (Most likely I wasn't looking at the
       | doctor/surgeon like I remember but facing the other way or
       | something.)
        
       | Bayart wrote:
       | I have snapshot memories from before the age of 1 that I can
       | certifiably say aren't false (no photographic evidence, no
       | external testimony, being able to recollect them regularly since
       | infancy) and that can be pinpointed to that time due to specific
       | details. They become a continuous stream around age 2 and
       | everything around age 3 starts being as clear as anything else.
       | 
       | In any case I've always found it interesting to have such a big
       | delta with the people around me but not particularly significant
       | until I seriously structured my introspection and got into
       | cognitive behavioural therapy.
       | 
       | With the aid of psychedelics I've managed to re-experience with
       | extreme clarity events that I remembered but didn't register as
       | meaningful and gleaned a new understanding about that period. For
       | example I've come to realize that as a toddler I was very aware
       | of my surroundings, of myself, I had an overwhelming feeling of
       | _boredom_ and probably needed far more stimulation than kids that
       | age ; hence behavioural patterns during adulthood that I
       | previously couldn 't explain.
        
         | pmontra wrote:
         | Your experience is more or less my experience. I even know a
         | person that remembers from well before being 1 year old. That
         | person started speaking very early, maybe that's related to
         | having early memories. Different people develop at different
         | times. The ages in the articles are averages of their
         | respective populations so these data points are offset, for
         | example, by the daughters of a friend of mine that told me that
         | they don't remember anything before being 5 or 6 years old.
        
           | thenthenthen wrote:
           | Before 1 is kinda absent, but from 2 I can remember factual
           | stuff pretty clearly (dramatic events, fun and less).
        
           | helboi4 wrote:
           | Yeah I'm always shocked that there's a general assumption
           | that people don't remember things before the age of 5. I
           | remember some things from 2 years old and everything is
           | pretty clear from 3 onwards. I do assume this is a sign of
           | advanced development.
        
             | danielbln wrote:
             | Memories are notoriously unreliable, pliable, subject to
             | induction etc. You may absolutely have retained memories
             | from that age, but it's just as likely that someone told
             | you and your turned it into a memory.
        
               | Gormo wrote:
               | > You may absolutely have retained memories from that
               | age, but it's just as likely that someone told you and
               | your turned it into a memory.
               | 
               | I suppose this is possible, but I personally have many
               | extremely detailed _visual_ memories of places and events
               | that happened well before I was five years old --
               | including memories that didn 't involve anyone who could
               | have reminded me of anything subsequently -- all of which
               | are consistent directly with each other.
               | 
               | If I had any painting skills, I could paint you a picture
               | of interior of the house I moved out of when I was 4,
               | including furniture, appliances, artwork on the walls,
               | even things like a green and yellow cardboard storage box
               | that we had on a shelf in the living room.
               | 
               | When I encounter small bits of information from the same
               | time and place, they always seem to corroborate my
               | memories, e.g. finding notes my dad wrote, which I'd
               | never read before, or finding a photo focusing on one
               | object in a larger room.
               | 
               | This seems to indicate that on the whole, my memories are
               | mostly accurate. Perhaps they were _reinforced_ by
               | conversations with family and varying other reminders,
               | but I 'm fairly certain that what was being reinforced
               | were real memories in the first place.
        
           | mihaaly wrote:
           | I have little patches being a little bit more than a feeling
           | starting around 3, having reliable ones from 5 upwards.
           | Having memories starting 1 sounds both amazing but also
           | scary.
        
         | rolph wrote:
         | have you ever had the experience of discovering evidence of
         | your past activities, and remembering what you forgot you
         | remembered?
         | 
         | example , peeling away a chip or two of a bad paint job on the
         | closet wall, to discover, its covering a big scribble,.,.
         | memories then smash the floodgates, and you vividly recall ,
         | marker in hand, self in awe, at the ^majic^ marker how it makes
         | lines so readily.
        
         | Gormo wrote:
         | > They become a continuous stream around age 2 and everything
         | around age 3 starts being as clear as anything else.
         | 
         | I'm pretty much exactly the same, with the same age thresholds.
         | I remember every detail of the house my family moved out of a
         | couple of months after my fourth birthday, including detailed
         | memories of events that took place there during the two years
         | prior.
         | 
         | I think a big factor might have been learning to read at around
         | the age of two, possibly creating deep and regularly reinforced
         | mnemonic links to my audiovisual recall.
         | 
         | > With the aid of psychedelics I've managed to re-experience
         | with extreme clarity events that I remembered but didn't
         | register as meaningful and gleaned a new understanding about
         | that period.
         | 
         | Out of curiosity, what did you specifically do to trigger these
         | "re-experiences"? Do you think doing this might have altered
         | the sensory memories of your early experiences themselves?
        
       | BurningFrog wrote:
       | Much of human evolution is about the tension between our big
       | brains making us smarter, but also killing our mothers more often
       | during birth.
       | 
       | The hack evolution landed on is that we're born 1-2 years
       | premature compared to most mammals.
       | 
       | From that perspective, this isn't especially weird.
        
       | darkhorn wrote:
       | It is interesting that many people do not remember events when
       | they were two years old. But much more interesting that some
       | people do not believe that there are people who can remember
       | events from age two.
        
       | r0ze-at-hn wrote:
       | This is my educated guess on the topic having spent time
       | investigating the intersection of poor memory, human growth
       | patterns etc where this topic intersects:
       | 
       | Norepinephrine is a key regulatory of memory. Before a certain
       | age the body is much more in parasympathetic activation v.s.
       | sympathetic activation, very low Norepinephrine, lower cortisol
       | response needs, etc. Once growth slows down and this can flip
       | over then mammals will start to form memories. Human curves for
       | the curious: https://obgynkey.com/growth-and-puberty-3/
       | 
       | Some fun notable mentions such as many earliest memories are
       | "super scary" and those with poor ability to produce
       | Norepinephrine and slower growth velocity will have later "first
       | memories" than everyone else.
        
       | fipar wrote:
       | > Babies are also almost completely unable to move around by
       | themselves and are constantly frustrated by their lack of agency.
       | They are extremely vulnerable and utterly dependent on the
       | kindness of their parents and other older humans in their
       | environment. They lack language so have no other way of
       | communicating than screaming, which is often also a cause of
       | great distress because of an inability to communicate a basic
       | need (and on that note, even knowing what those needs are half of
       | the time, given that the ability to make sense of ones own senses
       | is still being developed).
       | 
       | While mine did certainly scream when they were hungry (or
       | annoyed, or bored, or I picked the wrong red crayon, etc.), they
       | also had non-screaming verbal communication.
       | 
       | Both my kids started "talking" very early (I wanna say within the
       | first or, at most, second month of being born, but "and we'll
       | remember this when we are old and ancient though the specifics
       | might be vague". In any case, definitely while babies), it's just
       | that we (obviously?) didn't understand them. But they had a very
       | definite "language" of different sounds, which was also different
       | between them if we compare it.
       | 
       | Screaming is a good way for babies to get attention, but it's
       | certainly not the only one!
        
         | throwaway314155 wrote:
         | > Both my kids started "talking" very early (I wanna say within
         | the first or, at most, second month of being born...
         | 
         | Well sure if you just redefine what talking is...
        
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