[HN Gopher] Insomnia, Control
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Insomnia, Control
        
       Author : rpastuszak
       Score  : 60 points
       Date   : 2025-02-05 09:27 UTC (3 days ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (untested.sonnet.io)
 (TXT) w3m dump (untested.sonnet.io)
        
       | Aurornis wrote:
       | Insomnia often responds very well to therapy techniques, but this
       | requires the person to be open to the idea that therapy
       | techniques can help.
       | 
       | A common challenge is that people think they've "tried
       | everything" already and therefore therapy suggestions are
       | equivalent to dismissing the seriousness of their problem. It can
       | take a self-discovery like this article describes to bring
       | someone back around to the idea that the condition is related to
       | something like anxiety or obsessive behaviors and is receptive to
       | behavioral modification.
       | 
       | > I'd just skip the night and take my sweet time to: write, draw,
       | practice calligraphy, code a little toy, make a little sculpture
       | from a scrap of wood.
       | 
       | Importantly, none of these activities involve entering the
       | ragebait vortex that exists in most people's Internet time
       | wasting destinations. For many people it's enough to just cut out
       | Reddit or similar sites in the evening.
        
         | Schiendelman wrote:
         | You're so right. It's amazing how many people have this pattern
         | for so many problems in their lives. "I've tried everything" /
         | "I've tried that before" - and then closed to variations or
         | investigation. If you have this habit it's always worth
         | solving.
        
           | xattt wrote:
           | ... but I've tried to break this habit before and it's not
           | working!
        
       | almost_usual wrote:
       | Everyone is different but I was able to channel my creativity and
       | have it at other times in the day rather than 8pm and unravel
       | into the later evening and early morning.
       | 
       | Waking up at 4AM everyday for a rigorous workout was necessary.
       | Intense strength training or running a 5K at minimum and being
       | done by 5AM. Sobriety as well to stick to the schedule with
       | 6-7hrs of sleep. It works for me though.
        
         | Schiendelman wrote:
         | I think in this case we know enough about biology to not even
         | have to say "everyone is different" - regular exercise and
         | regular wake times, combined with no alcohol, help anyone's
         | sleep.
        
           | silotis wrote:
           | Eh, I've found my insomnia to be largely independent of the
           | amount of exercise I get. I can run 5 km during the day and
           | still only manage 3-4 hours the next night.
        
             | Aurornis wrote:
             | The key was "regular exercise". It's not as simple as
             | exercising once and having insomnia cured immediately for
             | that night.
             | 
             | It's about lifestyle changes and adaptation to those
             | changes over long periods.
        
               | silotis wrote:
               | I have a regular exercise routine I do every day. Believe
               | it or not some people still have insomnia even when they
               | follow all the usual lifestyle advise.
        
           | Aurornis wrote:
           | > regular exercise and regular wake times, combined with no
           | alcohol, help anyone's sleep.
           | 
           | It's amazing to hear when someone makes positive lifestyle
           | changes, sticks with them, and then reaps the benefits over
           | time.
           | 
           | I always do my best to be supportive and encouraging when I
           | hear people tell me about it in person, but I'm also amazed
           | at how people talk about their lifestyles prior to some of
           | these changes as if it was normal. I've heard multiple
           | stories of people cutting out alcohol, which after some
           | probing revealed that they were drinking at least 5 nights a
           | week and often multiple drinks (by the medical definition of
           | units of alcohol, not just number of physical containers) per
           | night.
           | 
           | It's common sense that changing these lifestyle habits will
           | provide benefits over months and years, but I guess when
           | you're in the middle of those habits and some people around
           | you are doing the same then it can feel normal.
        
           | xattt wrote:
           | I'm trying to figure out the no alcohol thing. Is half a can
           | of beer once or twice a week on weekend nights considered
           | alcohol consumption?
        
       | huijzer wrote:
       | > take a hot shower before bed
       | 
       | I don't know whether it was sensible for the author but for
       | people with sleeping problems here: in general it's probably not
       | a good idea to take a shower before going to bed. Warm showers
       | can feel relaxing but also increase the body temperature even
       | though it should be lowering before sleep. Conversely, cold
       | showers can stimulate the nervous system.
        
         | Schiendelman wrote:
         | Given the author and their relationship with anxiety(?) and
         | control, it's entirely possible it's harmful to their sleep,
         | but they haven't tried not doing it for long enough to really
         | validate.
        
         | picture wrote:
         | Seconding this. I found out that I get mini-nightmares and get
         | woken up if I try to sleep immediately after a hot shower, so I
         | switched to morning showers. This also helps me set a hard wake
         | up time since the shower gets me awake
        
         | n4r9 wrote:
         | Hot showers are known to aid sleep, although it's generally
         | assumed that the shower happens an hour or two before bedtime.
         | That allows the body to cool down. Some evidence suggests
         | that's it's not the total body temperature but the rate of
         | cooling which actually helps with winding down.
         | 
         | https://www.sleepfoundation.org/sleep-hygiene/shower-before-...
        
       | RevEng wrote:
       | This idea of learning not to be anxious about insomnia is what
       | CBT-I is all about. A lot of insomniacs are such because they
       | worry about not sleeping, which keeps them awake. It's a self
       | fulfilling prophecy. By learning to accept the prospect of a
       | sleepless night, you allow yourself to relax and sleep.
       | 
       | A lot of sleep anxiety can also be the result of generalized
       | anxiety disorder, so it's worth considering therapy and/or
       | medication. That anxiety can just be worries about your job,
       | life, and other stressful environments, in which case improving
       | your life conditions can alleviate the insomnia. There can be a
       | lot of reasons for insomnia that aren't primary insomnia.
        
       | Waterluvian wrote:
       | The only advice I'll ever give on insomnia is to keep trying new
       | things, and to go ask for help.
       | 
       | I tried just about everything in terms of routine and ritual.
       | Years and years of suffering and putting holes in basement
       | drywall and believing I'm broken and increasingly frequent
       | thoughts of suicide. And I hit a tipping point where the pain
       | overcame my stupid stubbornness and I finally went and asked for
       | help.
       | 
       | "I don't want Ambien or one of those life destroying drugs. I'd
       | rather just go quietly" was my thinking and what I said to I the
       | doctor.
       | 
       | Introduced to a newish drug without significant side effects or
       | addictiveness and it immediately changed my life. Sleep is now a
       | feature as my dreams are incredibly vivid. It changed a family
       | member's life too. It didn't do a thing for another close friend.
       | 
       | Just keep trying things. Don't give up.
        
         | grandiego wrote:
         | Great for you! Could you give the name of such drug in order to
         | ask some feedback from my doctor? Some years ago she prescribed
         | one which got me sleeping but I woke up awfully tired (left
         | after a week.)
        
           | Waterluvian wrote:
           | Lemborexant.
        
         | melvinroest wrote:
         | > Just keep trying things. Don't give up.
         | 
         | I agree with this. For me, fixing insomnia has been my number
         | one priority for the past 3 years. It's also a fairly easy
         | priority as during the day you don't actually need to do a
         | whole lot about it other than some reflection. So improvement
         | is pretty slowgoing, simply because you only have 1000
         | iterations and you're already 3 years older
        
       | dosinga wrote:
       | Given your self permission to do something and don't care about
       | the sleep is interesting; I have done this, worked on something
       | till 2am and then fall asleep and wake up refreshed at 9am
        
         | zoklet-enjoyer wrote:
         | That's 7 hours of sleep. I'd be surprised if you didn't feel
         | refreshed.
        
       | 127 wrote:
       | This might be obvious and trivial to others, but alas. Going to
       | bed early at a specified time, shutting down all computers well
       | before that and just spending hours relaxing, did absolute
       | wonders to the quality of my sleep. I'm using a smart watch to
       | measure and the positive impact is an order of magnitude.
       | 
       | At times I entertained the idea that I was an insomniac, but I
       | was just stupid. I need to shut down all stimulus well before I
       | intend to sleep or it might ruin my entire night.
        
         | orev wrote:
         | Also stop all caffeine consumption after 2:00 at the latest.
        
           | balfirevic wrote:
           | People go to sleep and wake up at different times. Giving a
           | fixed number makes no sense.
        
             | parpfish wrote:
             | And people have different caffeine sensitivities.
             | 
             | Im one of the people that can have an after dinner espresso
             | late at night with no effect. In fact, too much caffeine
             | (like a large energy drink) often has the effect of
             | knocking me out and I can barely keep my eyes open
        
         | balfirevic wrote:
         | > and just spending hours relaxing
         | 
         | How many hours?
        
         | lazyeye wrote:
         | I set up a smart bulb to act as a "color clock" in the evening.
         | Every day at 8pm it's orange, 9pm red, 10pm off (sleep time).
         | The brightness is very low (dim glow) and all other lights are
         | off. 8pm onwards is cool down time. I tend to read mainly after
         | 9pm. It really calms you down and keeps you on a consistent
         | sleep schedule without the angst of clock-watching. Highly
         | recommended.
        
         | melvinroest wrote:
         | > Shutting down all computers well before that and just
         | spending hours relaxing
         | 
         | Yea, I've sometimes do it this. I have had mixed success with
         | it. The opposite of it though is definitely detrimental. It's
         | still nice to be able to just relax for other reasons though
         | such as less of a focus on (social) media
        
       | melvinroest wrote:
       | Since recently I have a fairly good control over my insomnia. Key
       | points for me are tackling my biggest issues:
       | 
       | __Issue 1: not wanting to go to bed__
       | 
       | By reflecting on the why and how, I can make myself go to bed
       | much easier, even if I don't want to. It's just having a dialogue
       | with myself
       | 
       | __Issue 2: not falling asleep__
       | 
       | 1. Low dose of melatonin (0.3 mg): fixes the issue of falling
       | asleep. I buy it in the Netherlands. It seems much better
       | regulated than the US
       | 
       | 2. Sometimes magnesium: fixes a bit of a restless leg issue I
       | have sometimes
       | 
       | __Issue 3: waking up after 4 hours of sleep and not falling
       | asleep__
       | 
       | The issue is that I can't take melatonin anymore. I've noticed it
       | makes me too woozy during the day. Here is what works for me:
       | relax, slow down thoughts; shift hyper alertness to a cozy,
       | euphoric and safe state; reducing social media addiction. Let's
       | go through these ideas one by one
       | 
       | 1. Relaxation through slow breathing: basic but important. I've
       | noticed when I don't do this but do everything else, then I can
       | still fall asleep but it's harder
       | 
       | 2. Reducing the speed and frequency of thoughts through breathing
       | meditation: if I think too much, I can't sleep. Breathing
       | meditation (observing the breath) has taught me how to reduce my
       | thoughts. Sometimes I don't even do breathing meditation but I
       | just focus on lying still physically and mentally
       | 
       | 3. Increasing feelings of coziness through mindfulness
       | meditation: for me the biggest breakthrough has been the focus on
       | coziness. Extreme coziness makes my consciousness drift away. So
       | even if I don't fall asleep, I don't mind
       | 
       | 4. Increasing feelings of euphoria through mindfulness meditation
       | and thinking of pleasant thoughts: in my case that's about being
       | at locations I like, with the people I love, doing things I find
       | fun. This is in the same vein of "think of pleasant thoughts".
       | Well, yea, but it needs to induce a mild euphoric effect which
       | aids coziness
       | 
       | 6. Increase feelings of safety by telling myself I am safe:
       | simply telling myself I am safe makes me feel more safe. I never
       | noticed that I felt unsafe or anything but telling myself I am
       | safe makes me feel more safe. Safety increases coziness
       | 
       | 7. Reducing the amount of waking up by reducing social media
       | addiction: I don't have data, but the anecdotal evidence on my
       | part is that I noticed I woke up more often when I was severely
       | addicted to social media. I think in my case it's because
       | whenever I wake up, I wake up with a lot of energy. So after 4
       | hours of sleep, I feel tremendously awake. I noticed that when I
       | wanted (social) media entertainment that I felt even more
       | restless. So my suspicion is that feeling restless for more
       | entertainment can actually wake you up
       | 
       | These are the strongest things I've noticed that are conductive
       | to sleep for me, and I've tried _a lot_. I hope it helps someone.
       | Almost no one talks about the feeling of coziness for me, but
       | focusing on coziness is where it 's at for me. Relaxation and
       | pleasant thoughts are nice, but coziness is the main driver for
       | me to fall asleep
       | 
       | There are many more things I do such as knowing what sleeping
       | position I sleep best in, controlling temperature, controlling
       | light, controlling sound, eyemask, standing up when the sun
       | rises, having a sleep journal where I write down every time I
       | have had a bad night sleep or really good night of sleep.
       | Anything surprising needs to be logged and reflected about.
       | Sometimes the answer comes quickly, sometimes it takes years
        
       | adadtttt wrote:
       | This sounds like OCD
        
       | pedalpete wrote:
       | I'm a life long insomniac which got me into working in
       | neurotech/sleeptech about 5 years ago.
       | 
       | People talk about CBT-I, sleep anxiety, etc etc.
       | 
       | From what I've found, this may be great for people with transient
       | insomnia, where the stress is the cause of the insomnia. The key
       | for these people is often the CBT, which helps the I, not that
       | the CBT is to treat the I.
       | 
       | I've come to asking chronic insomniacs "is there something you
       | like about being awake in the middle of the night", and I've had
       | many responses such as "it's my time to think", "I know I should
       | be sleeping, but my mind is enjoying the peacefulness".
       | 
       | I'm not a very stressed person, and I can meditate in the middle
       | of the night, and yet still be awake.
        
       | spondylosaurus wrote:
       | The "Dog mode" article referenced in the linked article sounds an
       | awful lot like mania to me. I wonder if that's a factor here.
        
       | mssuraj wrote:
       | Thanks for sharing this! I can relate to a lot of these: * the
       | attempts at strict protocols and sleep hygiene (including doing
       | CBT-I) * the anxiety loop about sleep itself perpetuating sleep
       | disturbances
       | 
       | But accepting wakefulness and often at times when feeling
       | inspired, to just go with the flow and getting it out has really
       | helped me too! Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night
       | anxious, other nights with lot of new ideas, and instead of now
       | worrying about them, acknowledging them and dealing with it
       | (meditation, journaling, parking them, or just going to work),
       | helps me resume sleep even after multi-hour interruptions!
       | 
       | Glad to hear there are others out there too :)
       | 
       | PS: I also wrote a brief post about my own sleep experience if
       | anyone's curious!
       | 
       | https://open.substack.com/pub/mssuraj/p/why-we-shouldnt-slee...
        
       ___________________________________________________________________
       (page generated 2025-02-08 23:01 UTC)