[HN Gopher] Another burnout post
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Another burnout post
        
       Author : gushogg-blake
       Score  : 59 points
       Date   : 2024-10-18 15:21 UTC (7 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (gushogg-blake.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (gushogg-blake.com)
        
       | david-gpu wrote:
       | Good luck. Burnout drains your soul. It gets better, but it takes
       | time. Exercising outdoors helps, even if it is just taking long
       | walks.
        
         | fullspectrumdev wrote:
         | Long walks are honestly underrated.
         | 
         | Especially if you make them a consistent thing and start upping
         | the distance over time and varying the routes.
         | 
         | It becomes incredibly enjoyable to just get out and fucking
         | walk around, look at things, listen to music maybe, and explore
         | a bit.
         | 
         | Something I've been looking to write for a while is some kind
         | of thing that I can input a distance, my location, and have it
         | plot unique and somewhat random loop routes. Ideally optimising
         | for exploring novel areas of where I live, with some kind of
         | "route tracking".
         | 
         | The point is largely the journey.
        
       | adbmal wrote:
       | Meaningful jobs do exist and more can be created. You are a
       | probably high-paid, skilled professional and, contrary to popular
       | belief, you _do_ have agency.
       | 
       | Quit your job and start doing something meaningful. Start a
       | company or join one that makes a difference.
       | 
       | Take risks, it's really rewarding.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | I think for me at least, the difference between "programming
         | for fun/own projects" and "programming for work" goes deeper
         | than the difference between say a company with neutral/bad
         | values and a company you might be passionate about mission-
         | wise. At the end of the day, as the software guy, your job
         | still consists of:
         | 
         | 1) taking instructions from someone else on exactly what to
         | build, and how (choice of framework etc)
         | 
         | 2) working backwards from someone else's code to figure out
         | what they were thinking and how to modify it to the
         | requirements/add a new feature/whatever
         | 
         | I got into programming because it was a great form of self-
         | expression. I've had some great jobs that related to my
         | interests, e.g. adding variants to Chess.com, but at the end of
         | the day that was still someone else's project and I was just
         | the guy they were getting to build it for them. The inherent
         | satisfaction wasn't there. YMMV though obviously, but I like to
         | use an art analogy: if you're a painter, you'll always be
         | frustrated and demotivated painting portraits of people's pets
         | -- even if it's for charity, or you like the person, or
         | whatever.
        
           | bbkane wrote:
           | Another way personal projects are different is the fact that
           | there's not usually someone depending on you- whether that's
           | in the form of timelines, API stability, tech choice, etc.
           | 
           | I'm working on a large breaking change to a personal codebase
           | right now, and its taken almost 3 years of procrastination,
           | lazy research when I feel like it, and the API changing and
           | changing again due to rewrites. I'd like to finish by 2025,
           | but if I don't, nothing happens!
           | 
           | The whole thing has felt fun due to the lack of pressure and
           | just... not working on it when I feel like doing something
           | else.
           | 
           | Very different from work projects, even the interesting ones
           | with great bosses and teammates.
        
           | tornadofart wrote:
           | 1/ SWE jobs where you have some agency on what to build and
           | the tooling choice do exist. Try working as an employee for
           | an engineer-driven company.
           | 
           | 2/ that can be rewarding. I have found nuggets of genius in
           | other people's code. Being able to think like someone else is
           | a valuable intellectual exercise.
           | 
           | On self-expression: the most highly trained musicians at the
           | best orchestras spend their time refining the interpretation
           | of music they didn't write. The more constraints are written
           | into the sheet music, the more creative you have to get.
           | 
           | I'm not saying your perspective is wrong. I'm just saying
           | someone could have your job and come to completely different
           | conclusions.
           | 
           | Maybe you have to change your perspective or find an
           | occupation which matches your perspective on life and work.
           | Or you could keep your job and rant on your blog from time to
           | time if that's what you need. Ranting is sometimes necessary
           | for mental hygiene.
           | 
           | Out of curiosity: What exactly kept you from working on a pet
           | project instead of adding variants to Chess.com? Fear of
           | failure? Fear of rejection from your audience? Something else
           | entirely? Sometimes a little courage is all it takes to bring
           | more happiness into your life.
        
       | OldGuyInTheClub wrote:
       | His response of switching to "ancestral" food and jawline
       | modification is ... interesting.
        
         | dandigangi wrote:
         | Definitely not the left turn I expected either.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | Haha, that's actually something I've been doing for years as
         | well. Had jaw issues from underdevelopment and premolar
         | extractions since 2011. Only discovered that it was a known
         | thing and started getting treatment in 2023 though.
        
       | JohnMakin wrote:
       | Good analogy presented here, except some situations can be far
       | worse - what he's describing is _best_ case scenario. You can
       | very easily end up in toxic teams /situations or with a toxic
       | boss that makes every day miserable for absolutely no reason.
       | Plus all that other stuff.
       | 
       | Burnout is real and if I get a whiff for it I immediately seek
       | other options. Having experienced it before, it took about 6
       | months to recover. There are a lot of warning signs I had ignored
       | when it happened.
       | 
       | Unlike the author, I don't find any particular joy in programming
       | for the sake of it. It is difficult though, sometimes you can
       | have an extraordinarily complex task that requires a flash of
       | inspiration to solve. The kind of rumination that leads to these
       | flashes typically comes to me in non-working hours, so I feel
       | like I am never "off." You can't just force that kind of thing.
       | If you're burnt out, that dynamic is even worse.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | Yeah, true. I learnt to avoid those pretty quickly thanks to my
         | fairly disagreeable and risk-tolerant nature. Still had some
         | not very good experiences though.
        
         | Threadbare wrote:
         | I like my job (I think..) and am on my third burnout. There's
         | no worse feeling than being barely able to muster pinky finger
         | strength equivalent brain processing power over an 8 hour
         | working day, on high viz projects with tight time lines and
         | daily stand up reporting on progress. Today I literally noped
         | to bed with the laptop, looked at the problem a few times and
         | concluded it can wait until Monday.
        
       | stefanos82 wrote:
       | The problem with programmers is that the mind works non-stop
       | while the body is completely still, which goes against its
       | nature, in all respects. When the body is tired, at most a week
       | of rest it recovers nicely and is full of energy! This
       | unfortunately does not apply to the mind, I have tried it and
       | unfortunately I suffer from long-term mental burnout. If I could
       | find another job that wasn't so mentally demanding and easy to
       | do, then yes I would quit this field yesterday!
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | I've often thought we're doing something fundamentally wrong by
         | treating programming like any other office job, or even like a
         | "production" type job like manufacturing. It's of course
         | nothing like that - as you say, the mind doesn't have the same
         | recharging characteristics as the body. I get the feeling
         | people maybe compensate for it by having a lot of downtime in
         | the day where they're kind of pretending to work, but I would
         | find that maddening. I'm either working or I'm not, in which
         | case I want to be free to do what I want without someone
         | looking over my shoulder.
        
           | stefanos82 wrote:
           | I wholeheartedly agree with you, especially on the shoulder
           | part.
           | 
           | The reason I regretted dealing with programming from a
           | professional standpoint is that I have realized I like it
           | more as a hobby, not as a profession!
           | 
           | When it's your hobby, no one is telling you what to do,
           | whether you are doing something wrong or not, nor to follow
           | the latest trend with <X> framework or this new <Z>
           | programming language; quite frankly, you simply don't care
           | what others say to you, because you have found your rhythm,
           | your pace if you will, with the tech stack of your choice;
           | you know, the one that clicked with you immediately!
           | 
           | This is my personal experience up until I switch my hobby to
           | professional career; that's when it went downhill and have
           | stopped loving it ever since...I feel trapped, like millions
           | of others than cannot escape this category.
        
             | ryandrake wrote:
             | Yea, I got into programming because I love Lone Wolf
             | Programming. Programming as part of a team is a completely
             | different endeavor and liking one doesn't necessarily mean
             | you'll like the other.
        
               | stefanos82 wrote:
               | Lone Wolf Programming...I love that! LOL :D For some
               | reason I was thinking of it more as "My Hermit Life" type
               | of Programming, but yours is more accurate!
        
         | nradov wrote:
         | Come on. The majority of programming work isn't particularly
         | mentally demanding, at least not any more so than other
         | professional office jobs. It's not like lawyers or mechanical
         | engineers have it any easier.
        
           | stefanos82 wrote:
           | Allow me to disagree with you here.
           | 
           | When your boss would like you to be a DevOps and a full-stack
           | developer, while following all the latest trends, their ins
           | and outs, the countless JS / TS frameworks out there, we can
           | have a chat on who's having it worse or easier than the
           | other.
        
             | nradov wrote:
             | Some HN users have a really skewed sense of how software
             | development works in most of the industry. Only a small
             | minority of jobs involve full-stack web development with JS
             | / TS frameworks. If you want a slower pace of change then
             | go get a job writing embedded missile avionics software for
             | Raytheon or something. This is a serious suggestion, I'm
             | not being sarcastic. Jobs like that are a good option for a
             | lot of developers.
             | 
             | The grass always looks greener on the other side.
        
               | stefanos82 wrote:
               | Thank you for the suggestion, but I doubt I would work as
               | a foreigner for a US defense contractor company that
               | produces military weapons; that's the last thing I would
               | want to do.
        
           | realusername wrote:
           | Depends for what, the energy you are required to spend to
           | keep updated on new stuff coming up is greater than any other
           | job I'm aware of.
           | 
           | Most other mental jobs change at a much slower rate than in
           | tech.
        
       | naming_the_user wrote:
       | > It's hard to explain to people who aren't programmers just how
       | soul-destroying it is to work for someone else in this industry.
       | Maddeningly hard, in fact.
       | 
       | It's hard for me to understand this _as a programmer_. I've been
       | through burnouts and every single time it's been a matter of me
       | pushing myself too hard, the external pressure was never actually
       | real.
       | 
       | From your blog post it sounds as if realistically you're 40k in
       | debt due to jaw surgery which really has nothing to do with
       | programming at all?
       | 
       | I dunno man, with the greatest of respect (I appreciate that this
       | is a serious health issue for you) the blog comes across as if
       | you like mushrooms a bit too much.
       | 
       | > My sense is that the constricting effect of modern narrow
       | footwear inhibits proper tongue posture via this connection.
       | 
       | Seriously? 99% of people wear shoes, have a mouth and have no
       | issues at all with... tongue posture? I don't even know what my
       | tongue posture is.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | Haha, yeah I can see why it would sound like that if you
         | haven't experienced similar issues. I would disagree on 99% of
         | people not having tongue posture issues though. If you look at
         | the structure of a lot of modern people's faces, we have an
         | "adenoid" face - narrow, long midface, lack of pronounced
         | cheekbones and eye support. The hypothesis is that chewing is
         | an essential part of proper jaw development, and modern soft
         | diets don't make us do enough of it.
        
           | gushogg-blake wrote:
           | (The relationship with tongue posture is possibly two-way -
           | lack of chewing and/or proper tongue posture causes the upper
           | jaw to develop narrower, which eventually prevents the tongue
           | from adopting its ideal position suctioned to the roof of the
           | mouth. The tongue not being there causes further narrowing
           | and downswing.)
        
         | ZacharyPitts wrote:
         | Maybe this is reference to the tongue of a shoe? IDK, still odd
        
       | eweise wrote:
       | Work is named "work" for a reason. Its a lot not fun. I've been
       | slinging code for 35 years. It pays the bills, sends my kids to
       | college etc. Of course i'm burned out but I would be tired of
       | anything after this long. Trick for me is to not to make work my
       | purpose. Instead I bike, hike, make music, raise my kids, etc. I
       | also don't work overtime or weekends even though almost everyone
       | else on my team does. They will not make it for the long run like
       | that.
        
         | parpfish wrote:
         | in addition to not doing overtime/weekends, when you're doing
         | work during the day you should monotask as much as possible.
         | just focus on one thing at a time, preferrable until you're
         | done with it.
         | 
         | the cost of constantly shifting attention to multitask made
         | everything seem frantic and you never got the sense to
         | appreciate that a thing was 'done' because there was always ten
         | other things cooking in the background.
         | 
         | you'll be surprised how much this _doesn 't_ kill your overall
         | productivity while also preserving mental health. slow is
         | smooth, smooth is fast.
        
         | candiddevmike wrote:
         | I'm seeing folks like you get laid off with the current
         | climate. Your trick is to not play the game, which may not be
         | feasible right now.
        
           | r2_pilot wrote:
           | > I'm seeing folks like you get laid off with the current
           | climate.
           | 
           | Who cares? At this stage in my life (and a distant second my
           | career too), if that's the kind of attitude your work demands
           | of you, there's plenty of other validating things to do that
           | also provide a living. And I always hear that people don't
           | quit their jobs, they quit their bosses. But yeah, I would
           | never fire someone for setting appropriate life/work
           | boundaries and sticking to them.
        
           | piva00 wrote:
           | It's entirely feasible if you live in places that don't
           | follow American-esque systems of labour relationship.
        
           | eweise wrote:
           | I do worry about that and that's why the most important thing
           | is to work for the right manager. Keep on their good side,
           | make them feel like you're an asset even if not sprinting
           | every sprint, and I've found that they'll go to bat for you
           | at review time.
        
           | lurking_swe wrote:
           | not at my workplace, people usually work 8 hours on average
           | and that's it. Find a better employer, they exist. Yes even
           | ones that pay $200k+.
           | 
           | I realize not everyone is so fortunate. I had to start at
           | some not so great companies in my career, but over time if
           | you're picky enough, you can find a great employer. I
           | encourage everyone to know their worth. Don't settle.
        
         | dec0dedab0de wrote:
         | Sounds more like you managed to avoid burning out.
        
           | djbusby wrote:
           | Right. Work being "not fun" is a long way from Burnout (which
           | looks a lot like, and maybe is, depression).
           | 
           | The difference between a Grind and Hopeless.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | Yeah, it's probably a personality thing in large part. I find
         | that the sense of my creative energy being wasted on something
         | pointless disagrees with me so much that I'd rather do almost
         | anything else (I actually find jobs to be a great source of
         | inspiration in that way - ideas for better things to do keep
         | springing to mind - although not great for productivity on the
         | job).
         | 
         | I do think there are different types of "work" though, and the
         | worse programming jobs have some of the worst combinations of
         | attributes - inherently pointless but require intense mental
         | effort.
        
         | ryandrake wrote:
         | > I also don't work overtime or weekends even though almost
         | everyone else on my team does. They will not make it for the
         | long run like that.
         | 
         | Not only will they not make it for long, but they're actually
         | devaluing their own work. You're paid a salary for a standard
         | work week. If you're working nights and weekends, you're giving
         | away that portion of your work for free. I learned and
         | appreciated this fact too late in my career.
         | 
         | IMO a business that can only function/succeed if employees give
         | away their time for free is not a viable business and probably
         | just shouldn't exist. Don't Do Crunch Time.
        
       | Arainach wrote:
       | Burnout is awful, but this post seems preachy and out of touch.
       | 
       | >It's hard to explain to people who aren't programmers just how
       | soul-destroying it is to work for someone else in this industry.
       | Maddeningly hard, in fact. Your profession involves hard mental
       | work. You work at the limit of your creative, analytical and
       | problem-solving abilities. You think and read outside of sessions
       | to improve your craft. You bring your entire self to the task of
       | healing someone's trauma, figuring out what's holding them back,
       | or whatever. Now imagine it was all completely pointless.
       | 
       | What part of this doesn't apply to every other discipline? Plenty
       | of people feel that everything they do is pointless. Plenty of
       | people spend their entire mental effort at work.
       | 
       | The Hacker News crowd has a higher than average fraction of
       | people who think they have to never turn off and always be doing
       | computer science work even when not at work. That correlates
       | strongly with burnout, but that's not a programming thing, that's
       | a personality type. Go outside and get some fresh air. Every day.
       | Stop staring at screens 24/7. That can't entirely prevent burnout
       | but it helps a lot.
        
         | dec0dedab0de wrote:
         | I think IT being exempt from overtime is part of the problem.
         | Nurses for example see a direct increase in wage when they work
         | extra, and many lawyers bill by the minute.
         | 
         | But I think the biggest thing is that programming is a craft,
         | and many programmers think of themselves as artists. As an
         | artist it is heartbreaking to see your creations tainted and
         | then discarded by corporate politics.
         | 
         | In my experience, devs who take more pride in closing tickets
         | than coming up with elegant solutions are less susceptible to
         | burn out. I don't know exactly how they do it, but they do tend
         | to have many hobbies. They don't lose sleep over shipping some
         | spaghetti code they copied from stack overflow without
         | understanding. They just treat it as something to get out of
         | their way so they can get to the things they actually enjoy.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | I think it applies to an extreme degree in programming - but
         | probably in eng. & STEM fields generally as well. Something
         | about having to care a lot about very small details, and
         | especially when the big picture is not something you
         | particularly care about. But yeah, I don't have any experience
         | in other fields so maybe it's not that unique - I guess it was
         | driven mostly by the experiences I've had with people not
         | getting it, and being frustrated with me that I wouldn't "just
         | work a well-paid coding job for 5 years".
        
       | tra3 wrote:
       | Does burn out exist in other professions? I recall seeing
       | something about doctors/lawyers.
       | 
       | I know (distantly) some folks in the medical profession and it
       | sounds way worse than what we go through. Not trying to diminish
       | the real stress that we go through in this industry. Wondering if
       | we can learn something from other industries in a similar (or
       | indeed more difficult) position.
        
         | mholm wrote:
         | Doctors can be exploited further because they're typically in
         | far deeper. More medical debt, more education, more of their
         | life has been given to the medical world. To leave that would
         | be to throw it all away. Maybe they'd be happier that way
         | anyway. On the flip side, they know they're making a genuine
         | difference in people's lives. Doctors do incredibly important
         | work, and if they just don't show up, people can die. If a
         | programmer doesn't show up for work, In many cases, an ad
         | tragically goes unclicked, or a feature doesn't get released
         | for a few extra days.
         | 
         | There are absolutely more meaningful jobs for programmers,
         | where they have more impact on the product, get to actually
         | influence lives, or work with challenging and fulfilling
         | technical problems. But most of them aren't doing that.
        
         | riiii wrote:
         | Burnout very much exists in other professions.
        
         | avensec wrote:
         | Given that burnout is a physiological state of
         | emotional|physical|mental|... exhaustion, yes, other
         | professions experience burnout. However, which subtype of
         | burnout is more prevalent in different career fields, or at
         | different stages of life.
         | 
         | When someone says they are experiencing burnout, my first
         | question is, what type of burnout is it? Have they broken down
         | the problem yet?
         | 
         | Is it Overload? Their pace of work could be more sustainable,
         | work/live commitments are imbalanced, or there is a mismatch in
         | where they spend time vs. where they wish they were spending
         | time?
         | 
         | Is it Under Challenged? Do they not feel stimulated by the
         | work, are their abilities not being developed, or are they
         | wasted in their current role? Are they more interested in what
         | comes next?
         | 
         | Is it Neglect? They don't feel recognized for their efforts,
         | they don't have a good mentor or sponsor, they give up on
         | themselves when faced with challenges, or they abuse themselves
         | through unhealthy habits (neglect can be self-neglect)?
        
       | freeplay wrote:
       | I feel this very deeply. At the same time, I feel shame for
       | feeling this way. I have a very high paying job, excellent
       | flexibility, and I work from home. It doesn't get much better.
       | Except that when I sit down at the computer, the actual work and
       | meetings to talk about the work are unbelievably draining.
       | 
       | The shame is because I know others would love to be in my
       | position and there is an almost endless list of jobs that are
       | worse than this, but it's brutal sometimes. I workout daily and
       | spend the vast majority of my time away from the keyboard,
       | outside.
       | 
       | The worst part is, it's not just a matter of embrace the suck and
       | push on. In a physical labor job, you can just command the body
       | to move and push through it. In this line of work, you don't
       | really have that option. You can't just command the brain to
       | solve difficult problems and design complex systems.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | Yeah, I think there's this idea of programming as something you
         | 1) know how to do and then 2) can just sit at a computer and do
         | some typing, and it happens. It's hard for outsiders to
         | understand just how dependent it is on being engaged and in a
         | position to direct your full mental attention to abstract
         | problems for long periods.
        
       | uptownfunk wrote:
       | I love how out there this guy seems and kudos to his courage for
       | sharing his thoughts and feelings and being able to go and do
       | something to the beat of his own drum.
        
       | VyseofArcadia wrote:
       | I think very few software engineering jobs are set up to be
       | enjoyable (or even tolerable) to a large fraction of the people
       | who are drawn to such jobs.
       | 
       | I'm self taught[0]. I was drawn to computers at an early age, and
       | I was hacking little projects together in a couple of different
       | languages by the time I was in middle school. This was a very
       | solitary activity for a very introverted boy, and I loved it. I
       | still love it. Nothing compares to sitting down at a computer and
       | just letting the logic flow through me unimpeded and onto the
       | screen.
       | 
       | My job is not like that. I have 2 - 5 meetings a day. I am
       | constantly coordinating and brainstorming and just plain dealing
       | with other people. That is more draining than the coding.
       | Sometimes I have a decent chunk of time at the end of the day,
       | but I can't even bring myself to code because I am so drained by
       | all of the non-coding stuff I had to do earlier in the day.
       | 
       | I love my job. I do impactful work for an impactful company that
       | I think is doing actual good in the world. I work on an
       | interesting project, and they pay and treat me well. But in my
       | heart of hearts what I really want to be is not a software
       | engineer but instead some kind of self-directed code hermit.
       | 
       | [0] By which I mean I learned from books and examples and
       | experimentation. I did eventually get a computer science degree
       | also, but I had been coding for years before I took my first
       | class in it.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | Yeah this sounds a lot like me. I find it hard to imagine what
         | kind of personality _could_ tolerate a software job. Maybe some
         | people are more amenable to accepting the company's mission as
         | part of their identity, and can therefore find the inherent
         | satisfaction of doing a good job. But yeah, I always found the
         | meetings and coordination aspect to be quite taxing.
        
           | VyseofArcadia wrote:
           | I have known a lot of people at work who don't really care
           | about computers at all. (Not at my current job, more at
           | previous jobs.) They don't go home and do more computer stuff
           | for fun. They don't geek out over the new things coming in
           | C++23 or get nerd sniped by computer science problems. If you
           | ask them why they became a software engineer, they'll say
           | it's because the pay is good.
           | 
           | A lot of us are just drawn to computers and couldn't imagine
           | not tinkering with them constantly, but for some people this
           | is just, like, an office job. No different from being an
           | accountant or an insurance claims adjuster or something.
        
             | piva00 wrote:
             | One can also go through the phase of programming being the
             | most fun hobby, getting into a career related to it, and
             | phase out programming as a hobby.
             | 
             | It was one of the most fun hobbies I had earlier in life,
             | now after 20+ years of career, and even longer from
             | starting to program, it's just not that fun anymore.
             | 
             | I still tinker with it in fun ways I could never try as a
             | career, like electronics projects with microcontrollers,
             | but since my free time and energy dwindled with age I
             | allocate my hobbies' time to other more personally
             | fulfilling endeavours than keeping up with languages'
             | updates, compsci problems, etc. It's just not that
             | interesting anymore.
             | 
             | I stumbled upon this career, at the time I never even
             | considered or had known it was a very well paid one so I've
             | been extremely lucky for that but I don't hold that much
             | more interest in it as a hobby, for that I believe the time
             | has passed. It's now, to me, a very well paid office job.
        
         | stefanos82 wrote:
         | So far, from the majority of comments here, yours included, I
         | have concluded that we somehow got tricked to "upgrade" our
         | hobby to a career, with one major cost: sacrificing our
         | creative freedoms that companies demand us to give up on in
         | place of daily meetings.
        
           | VyseofArcadia wrote:
           | The allure of "get paid well to do something I was going to
           | do for free anyway" is strong.
        
             | stefanos82 wrote:
             | Yeah...my thinking was more like "if I already love doing
             | this as a hobby, why not do it and get paid for it?"; that
             | was my biggest mistake -_-
        
               | orev wrote:
               | Getting paid for doing something you love (or at least
               | _like_ when it comes to work tasks) is far better than
               | having to spend 40 hours a week doing something you hate
               | (in what is likely a much lower paid job), and then still
               | getting home with no energy left to do that thing you
               | love for maybe 1 hour.
        
       | dougb5 wrote:
       | > "You don't care about the goal to begin with"
       | 
       | This seems key. Are there options in your area for work with
       | goals you do care about?
        
       | tombert wrote:
       | My life got much better when I realized that I actually don't
       | like "programming".
       | 
       | I like solving problems _using_ programming languages, and like
       | designing large systems with computers, but I don 't actually
       | enjoy the programming itself. Programming without the designing
       | part just feels like data entry to me. There's nothing clever, or
       | creative, or interesting about it.
       | 
       | For years I've dealt with severe burnout because I had been lying
       | to myself and taking jobs that where I didn't really have to
       | "think", and I had no fun doing it, leading to me feeling like I
       | had really chosen the wrong career path and that I was stuck
       | feeling bored for the rest of my life.
       | 
       | Once I realized that programming for the sake of programming
       | isn't fun, I started putting my attention to jobs where I made it
       | clear that I'm going to be involved in the design and decision-
       | making process, and almost immediately I actually enjoyed working
       | again, after many years of not.
       | 
       | I'm not saying this is universal, if you like writing Java for
       | the sake of writing Java, don't let me take that away from you,
       | it's just not something I enjoy. Figuring out what you _actually_
       | enjoy doing is deceptively hard, but a worthwhile goal.
        
         | lylejantzi3rd wrote:
         | > I'm not saying this is universal
         | 
         | It's probably not universal, but I bet it's more common than
         | most people want to admit.
        
           | tombert wrote:
           | Yeah, I think you're right.
           | 
           | It's embarrassing how long it took me to realize that; for
           | years I wondered why I enjoyed working on my personal
           | projects but not my paid work, despite them being nominally
           | the same thing, and eventually I realized it was because _I_
           | made the decisions on my personal projects.
        
             | bravetraveler wrote:
             | Ditto. I don't like making decisions at work. I like the
             | tech; not politics.
             | 
             | Not to deride things too much. I'm trying to get better
             | about it, surrounded by good suggestions... I'm just
             | categorically exhausted
        
             | whatarethembits wrote:
             | I find that making design decisions about the class/feature
             | you're writing or how data is going to flow through your
             | little corner of the software scratches similar itch to
             | "big picture" architecture. What sucks is standups,
             | deadlines, constant having to give updates and being
             | measured on output. Take all that away and programming is a
             | _joy_
        
         | hello_moto wrote:
         | I was lucky (and blessed) that I also realized this early on.
         | 
         | I was an idealist, following best practices, learning the
         | language to the dot until I stumbled upon a different enjoyment
         | in work: mentoring, guiding, helping, cheering co-workers to be
         | on the same page, same direction, and to eventually deliver the
         | software/feature/product.
         | 
         | Once the clock hits 5.30PM, I checked out and ride my bike.
        
           | foco_tubi wrote:
           | I'm convinced bicycle commuting is what's going to make my
           | 8:30-5:30 bearable. Hope I'm right.
        
         | ryandrake wrote:
         | Same here, I stepped away from actual software writing as a
         | career and moved into Product management and then later Project
         | management, where I fit better. These kinds of roles give you a
         | bigger picture view, and put you in the position to help
         | prevent big planning or design mistakes from happening. Having
         | an actual software-writing background also helps immensely
         | since you need to interface with engineering daily and need to
         | speak their language. Too bad the compensation is a faction of
         | what it is in software development, but I happily made the
         | tradeoff.
         | 
         | I write code as a hobby now, and am much more satisfied with
         | that because I make all the decisions on my own personal
         | projects.
        
           | tombert wrote:
           | I'm still very much in the "engineering" space, but I do a
           | lot more stuff with the whiteboard, and even spend some time
           | doing TLA+/Pluscal before writing any code.
           | 
           | I think I'd be a pretty bad manager, I'm flaky in a way that
           | doesn't lend itself to that, but I think I'm ok at the more
           | "architectey" roles.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | I had a similar-ish realisation recently when writing a
         | business plan - having the ability to program felt like a
         | massive advantage (for e.g. writing a dynamic cashflow
         | forecast) but programming wasn't the main goal.
        
         | ToddWBurgess wrote:
         | I had the opposite experience. I actually left the industry and
         | then suffered a workplace injury in the new job(PTSD). Trust me
         | when I say this, PTSD really messes you up. One of the biggest
         | injuries was my brain's ability to logically reason.
         | 
         | So with lots of free time due to medical leave I got got back
         | into coding. Picking it up after having not done it for some
         | time was not too bad. After a while I was ready to start
         | learning new stuff. As I got better at coding a lot of my PTSD
         | symptoms started to subside. I had an easier time organizing my
         | thoughts.
         | 
         | Eventually my PTSD symptoms subsided and I knew enough code to
         | get a job writing code. So while yes, I have burned out on
         | coding it was also the old friend that dug me out of the hole.
        
         | KronisLV wrote:
         | > My life got much better when I realized that I actually don't
         | like "programming".
         | 
         | I like programming, but hate most things around it.
         | 
         | Under-documented code with odd patterns, no comments and bad
         | discoverability, like the code doesn't _want_ you to explore it
         | and work with it, but you instead have to dig in a whole bunch
         | to understand what you 're looking at, while you're already
         | juggling the problem domain in your head.
         | 
         | Same extends to working with projects themselves, like having a
         | placeholder README, no ADRs, no information about why certain
         | choices have been made, no investment into tooling or automated
         | linting etc., especially if some things are expected to be done
         | manually by the developers ("order the variables this way",
         | "format the code this way", "you must manually create these N
         | layers of abstraction to make the code consistent"), also
         | things like having no examples of how to use some of the
         | abstractions and if it's a front end project, no examples of
         | the components in isolation, separate from where they're used
         | in the main codebase, no gallery of sorts. Maybe things like
         | manual deploys, or environments with no monitoring/APM/uptime
         | alerting and other bits of tooling that are pretty much
         | essential, no clear information about how things are run on the
         | servers etc., where working feels like some form of archaeology
         | and detective work.
         | 
         | Also things like bike shedding, yak shaving, cargo culting,
         | taking practices as gospel (DRY/SOLID come to mind, though they
         | have their place), infrastructure aspects like not having your
         | local DB that's safe to break, slow compilation, flaky tests,
         | bad tooling, outdated packages and dependencies. Throw in
         | conflicts of interest and opinion that aren't managed well and
         | you have a recipe for burnout, the kinds of situation where
         | people are pretty much "against" you and what you're trying to
         | do, e.g. holding up a release over unrelated, non-blocking
         | concerns, or having drawn out discussions about how to write
         | code, when it doesn't feel like you're working "together" to
         | make things better for everyone. Even when there are
         | disagreements, it's possible to get to that better place, but
         | often time egos go unchecked, instead I actively try to be kind
         | to others in code review etc. nowadays.
         | 
         | Although humorous, posts like this still ring true in many
         | respects: https://www.stilldrinking.org/programming-sucks
         | 
         | But honestly, a lot of working in the industry also sucks due
         | to technical concerns. This might be a more personal example,
         | but I was trying to write some load tests in K6 for a web API.
         | The API uses STOMP on top of SockJS (using WebSockets when
         | available). K6 has support for WebSockets, except there's two
         | packages, one of which is experimental. I quickly realized that
         | SockJS wouldn't work, so I had to get rid of it in the project
         | (since IE doesn't need to be supported anyways), but even then
         | I realized that STOMP isn't supported out of the box, in part
         | due to the protocol never really taking off:
         | https://stomp.github.io/ I could find an extension, but getting
         | it working also proved to be a bit of work:
         | https://github.com/walterwanderley/xk6-stomp What sucked in
         | particular was not only not having that much documentation
         | about how to manage multiple subscriptions at the same time,
         | but also the fact that reads were blocking instead of Promise
         | based, though that might be due to how everything integrates
         | with K6, it's not like I can shoot off a background thread.
         | Eventually I got some jank implementation working that's based
         | on blocking until a short timeout (like 2 seconds) after which
         | the next subscription is done and data from it read, but it
         | feels like if the industry was a bit more coherent we'd have
         | like 2-3 solutions for similar use cases all of which would
         | work well, instead of the current disjointed mess. This also
         | applies to everything from OSes, to back end languages, front
         | end libraries/frameworks etc., though I guess the variety is
         | needed even if painful, so the better ideas survive the test of
         | time. Until someone does some CV driven development and adopts
         | a technology that's not ready.
         | 
         | That said, a lot of those things can be made better, as long as
         | you care enough (and hopefully are rewarded for making the work
         | not miserable).
        
         | codingwagie wrote:
         | The big problem with programming is its usually divorced from
         | big picture thinking. Businesses keep you away from business
         | conversations
        
         | bdangubic wrote:
         | I think 8hr/day is a bigger issue... I feel EXACTLY the same
         | way as you but after 25-ish years in the industry I also
         | realized that there is nothing I like enough to enjoy doing for
         | 8hrs per day, 1920 hrs per year...
        
         | piafraus wrote:
         | I felt the same until I found python.
         | 
         | Just in case you haven't tried it - perhaps it might ignite the
         | love to programming (if you want that). Python made the
         | programming fun to me again. Especially without the boilerplate
         | code.
         | 
         | Try to ignore the community strong push to use typing
         | everywhere and just write some clean small code and it feels
         | amazing. Designs and ideas in simple implementations.
        
           | ffsm8 wrote:
           | Isn't it the other way around? Java (in enterprise) is just
           | exceptionally able to suck the fun out of programming? It's
           | not even the fault of the language per se, it's just home to
           | a lot of "best practices" that ultimately end with
           | productivity coming to a grinding halt.
        
       | djyaz1200 wrote:
       | This says to me these people are working on projects that are not
       | challenging/interesting enough with people who don't respect
       | their intellect. That's a solvable problem.
       | 
       | Anecdote... I function as a product manager, and I have a lot of
       | fun with the developers I work with (and have a lot of respect
       | for), and they enjoy working with me. I come to them with
       | complex, interesting problems and my framework for potential
       | solutions, and we talk through whether they think it's the right
       | direction and, if so, what I've missed... or they propose
       | alternatives. It's like a chess game where we can both win.
       | 
       | I hope the OP and anyone feeling this way tries working with
       | other projects and people.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | That has certainly been a major aspect of it in the past -
         | feeling like I don't have enough autonomy to decide on the best
         | approaches etc - but I think now I probably have too much of a
         | high-level "what are we actually doing here?" kind of
         | uninterestedness for even that to make it work.
         | 
         | Maybe if we could go right to the bottom and start getting
         | everyone to be a bit more computer literate, so the software
         | didn't have to be so complicated, or something... I don't know.
        
       | bdndndndbve wrote:
       | Anyone in any profession can have burnout. Set money aside, set
       | boundaries, have a life outside of work. It's not exclusive to
       | computer programmers, and there's lots of worse burnout-inducing
       | jobs that pay less.
        
       | skrebbel wrote:
       | Is this supposed to be some art piece?
       | 
       | > _That is what professional programming is like. You don't care
       | about the goal to begin with, it doesn't have any noticeable
       | effect on the world once each Jira ticket moves over to the Done
       | column, and you don't have any ownership over the finished
       | product. You just wait for the next Jira ticket._
       | 
       | Sure, there are jobs like this, but it's super weird to claim
       | that all programming jobs are like this.
       | 
       | Just.. don't work those jobs! Find real jobs at real companies
       | making real products for real people. Don't stay at a job where
       | all your work ends up in a black hole of nothingness until you
       | burn out. The burnout means you quit too late.
       | 
       | I'm not saying it's easy to find programming jobs that cure
       | cancer, fix climate change or cause world peace, but it's really
       | not that hard to find programming jobs where what you make is
       | used by real people and if you make the thing you make better,
       | these real people will tell you that they're happy that it's now
       | better (and, immediately after, what else needs fixing). This can
       | be all the way from super challenging computer sciency shit to
       | line-of-business CRUD app coding at a small shop in a mid size
       | provincial town for regional customers. It exists everywhere.
       | 
       | ps. Personal context: Articles like these mildly offend me
       | because I run a company and we try _very_ hard to make everybody
       | 's time at the company worth their while. The suggestion that
       | business owners like me do not exist hits hard. In fact, we are
       | many. There's plenty bosses and entrepreneurs and managers out
       | there who realize that the more motivated and involved and happy
       | team members are, the better their work will be. Also being the
       | boss of stressed out burned-out programmers sounds like hell to
       | me. I'd much rather run a team of enthusiastic self-starters!
       | Incentives are, actually, pretty aligned (happy people = great
       | results) and companies where they're not are just, in my humble
       | opinion, badly run companies. Don't work there.
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | To be honest I've just never really liked programming for work,
         | and have felt kind of trapped in it as my only source of good
         | money for a few years. So there's probably some bitterness
         | there that I don't mean to offend anyone with. Even at what on
         | paper seemed to be a great job - fully remote, annual retreats,
         | great teammates, etc - I just couldn't resist the desire to
         | work on something that was actually mine, in some fundamental
         | way. So maybe "has no effect on the world" isn't the right way
         | to put it - but that's how it feels. I guess it's in the sense
         | of, if it wasn't me doing it, it would get done anyway, or
         | something. And at all the companies I've worked at at least, my
         | job as a programmer has been totally interchangeable with other
         | people. I think my main skill as a programmer is writing really
         | clear, solid code - line managers/clients have said this so
         | it's not just my own bias - and you get a little kick of
         | dopamine whenever you check some code in and someone goes
         | "great!". But then they go "OK, now do that again, forever".
         | The Jira tickets never end. You never get a big payout. That's
         | been my experience anyway. Maybe having equity would
         | significantly change the calculus.
        
           | skrebbel wrote:
           | This holds for psychotherapists too. Quit being a
           | psychotherapist and people will find another psychotherapist.
           | 
           | If this here is really how you feel then IMO your article is
           | misrepresenting things. Feeling like you want to work on
           | something that is your own makes a lot more sense to me than
           | suggesting that every programming job out there doesn't
           | affect anybody anywhere ever. I mean, I recognize this one
           | completely - it's why I started my own business in the first
           | place!
        
       | smokedetector1 wrote:
       | > It doesn't require the full engagement of your entire person,
       | like psychotherapy or software engineering. A long career would
       | be soul-destroying, for sure, but a day of driving can be
       | ploughed through much more easily by physical brute force than
       | can a day of software engineering.
       | 
       | I think this post comes across as unpleasant because it is so
       | dismissive of other peoples struggles. If you just said, yeah
       | software engineering isn't for me, that's one thing. But you're
       | saying software engineering is objectively the most difficult,
       | soul-destroying, draining job, and other people have it easier in
       | this respect. Im sorry but that's just objectively not true.
       | 
       | I would push you to consider that, maybe, something else is going
       | on for you individually, rather than write off the entire
       | endeavor due to an objective analysis. I worked for years at a
       | cancer center and while there were many times that the work was
       | dry, lonely, alienating, at the end of the day I still felt I was
       | doing something good for the world and that felt really good.
       | 
       | There's a lot of ways to apply software, and, maybe more to the
       | point, a lot of ways to integrate it into your life with balance.
       | What about part-time work, so you have more space for other parts
       | of your life you find satisfying? You may find that, with more
       | balance, you enjoy what the work _does_ have to offer, such as
       | being part of a team, being needed, being well-compensated, using
       | your whole intellect, etc.
       | 
       | Best wishes
        
         | JohnMakin wrote:
         | > I would push you to consider that, maybe, something else is
         | going on for you individually, rather than write off the entire
         | endeavor due to an objective analysis. I worked for years at a
         | cancer center and while there were many times that the work was
         | dry, lonely, alienating, at the end of the day I still felt I
         | was doing something good for the world and that felt really
         | good.
         | 
         | The difference being that the majority of software jobs are not
         | doing anything remotely good for the world, or if you are, you
         | are a infinitesimally small part of it to where you couldn't
         | possibly derive this same rewarding feeling. I would push you
         | to consider that maybe, your situation is one of privilege that
         | people in the OP's spot are not often in.
         | 
         | > There's a lot of ways to apply software, and, maybe more to
         | the point, a lot of ways to integrate it into your life with
         | balance. What about part-time work, so you have more space for
         | other parts of your life you find satisfying? You may find
         | that, with more balance, you enjoy what the work does have to
         | offer, such as being part of a team, being needed, being well-
         | compensated, using your whole intellect, etc.
         | 
         | Again, not everyone is afforded an extraordinary privilege of
         | just arbitrarily deciding to work part time. I certainly
         | couldn't. If I could, burnout would be less of an existential
         | risk. It's like telling someone with clinical depression "have
         | you tried cheering up?"
        
           | smokedetector1 wrote:
           | > The majority of software jobs are not doing anything
           | remotely good for the world
           | 
           | Firstly, this isn't true except in the narrowest sense where
           | only people working on cancer are doing anything good for the
           | world. Contributing to the economy in a non-destructive non-
           | evil way is still good, people need goods and services to
           | live a good life and almost every part of the economy plays
           | some positive role in that.
           | 
           | Secondly, my point is that one could find a non-sexy job in
           | tech at a hospital, or in an academic institution, that don't
           | necessarily pay top FAANG salary but, if fulfillment is more
           | important (as it seems to be for the OP), this would be a
           | good option.
           | 
           | > Not everyone is afforded an extraordinary privilege of just
           | arbitrarily deciding to work part time.
           | 
           | Of course that's true, but I was directing my comment at OP,
           | who said in the blog post that "I quit my last contracting
           | gig in August with PS40k in debt, no other income, and only a
           | business idea (it failed). It was still the right decision."
        
         | gushogg-blake wrote:
         | It certainly wasn't meant to be dismissive, can see how it
         | would come across like that though. I kind of rushed this post
         | out, and really should have stopped to think more about what I
         | wanted to say and how - wasn't expecting it to get on the front
         | page. I don't even think "burnout" is the right topic for it,
         | it probably just seemed like the closest title that would get
         | some interest.
        
         | bitfilped wrote:
         | Software and more broadly IT are soul crushing jobs though,
         | practitioners seem to get upset when that's pointed out but
         | it's still true. Very few other jobs require the always on
         | mentality that comes with IT work. Other folks typically show
         | up, do their jobs, and leave. Very few folks in software/IT are
         | able to have that type of relationship with their work. Maybe
         | it isn't personally draining for you, but it is a very mentally
         | taxing career path overall. This seems to get lost in the
         | broader perspective because a lot of IT practitioners like this
         | type of lifestyle, it doesn't change the fact that it's
         | demanding and I think we can do better in regards to
         | recognizing that as an industry. This also doesn't come across
         | as dismissive to me either, every job has its inherent
         | challenges and we should take time to reflect and recognize the
         | ones present in our own careers.
        
           | smokedetector1 wrote:
           | It is very demanding and that needs to be said, but I don't
           | like positioning it as more demanding than other careers.
           | People do a lot more for a lot less money. And people do a
           | lot more for the same amount of money. Every individual
           | should decide what trade off is best for them, but if someone
           | enjoys programming and are good at it, it could potentially
           | be better that they find a way to balance it in their lives
           | rather than writing it off completely.
        
       | didgetmaster wrote:
       | I grew up as an introvert who liked solving puzzles and problems,
       | so I gravitated towards computer programming. I retired a few
       | years ago after a career of 30 years with seven different
       | companies. I still have a personal project (a data management
       | system) that I think about often and write code for new features.
       | 
       | Over my career, I had jobs that were interesting and I looked
       | forward to each day (well...most days). I also had some that were
       | soul crushing and I dreaded.
       | 
       | Looking back, I realized that the ones where I felt I was in
       | control of my work product were the most fulfilling. I got to
       | decide what to work on and how much effort and time to spend on
       | each task. I wanted the product to succeed in the marketplace and
       | I gave it my best effort.
       | 
       | The jobs where it didn't feel like my ideas were valued or my
       | work appreciated were the worst. Burnout happened very quickly
       | and I moved on.
       | 
       | Interestingly, the ones that I controlled turned out to also be
       | the most profitable for the companies.
        
       | kaffekaka wrote:
       | It seems to me that many people dislike their software developer
       | job not because they don't like programming but because the
       | programming they get to do at work is not like the ideal world of
       | an interesting hobby project where you alone decide scope, stack,
       | deadline etc.
       | 
       | Meetings can suck. Design by committee. Scope creap. Crunch time.
       | Lack of respect. Constant distractions. All this sucks but is
       | part of many jobs, many workplaces. Expecting work to feel like a
       | hobby is admirable but sets you up for some disappointments.
       | 
       | I see my job not as the programming part, but the part of making
       | myself and my team experience the hobby project state as much as
       | possible, against all odds. The job _is_ the struggle.
       | 
       | Edit: I realize I might come off as insensitive. Burnout is a
       | real thing. However at most jobs that sweet hobby project feeling
       | is basically unattainable. I try to manage my energy so that I
       | have some left after work to do stuff purely for my own
       | enjoyment. I still enjoy my office job more than a I would a
       | similar job outside tech
        
       | gushogg-blake wrote:
       | Thanks for the comments. I wasn't expecting this to get on the
       | front page (although that is why I posted it, obviously) and kind
       | of wish I'd spent more time thinking about what I actually wanted
       | to say first. If I'm 100% honest I was mostly trying to get
       | clicks, which is always a bad motivation and I am generally
       | deliberate about this kind of thing, sorry about that... I don't
       | actually feel bitter, or particularly burnt out, with software
       | specifically, it just feels like it's not the career for me at
       | the moment. The general point about it often being misunderstood
       | is something I've wanted to articulate at various times though.
        
       | SirMaster wrote:
       | It's hard for me as a software developer to understand how soul-
       | destroying it is to work for someone else in this industry.
       | 
       | I have worked as a developer for someone else's company since
       | college, for 15 years now, and I don't know how else to describe
       | it other than I like what I do and find it fun and stimulating.
       | 
       | I don't think it's strictly the profession. I think either the
       | person doesn't really like it as much as they think they do, or
       | they work for a company that pushes them too hard and doesn't
       | treat them well.
       | 
       | I guess that's obvious, but in my experience at least it doesn't
       | have to be that way.
        
       | ThalesX wrote:
       | Disclaimer: nothing substantial, just a bit of trauma dump
       | 
       | I've been a developer for more than a decade. Body-shops.
       | Founding engineer. Chief Technology Officer. After every job in
       | my life I took 6 - 12 months off.
       | 
       | Usually my desire for programming comes back somewhere around the
       | 5th month mark. I'm in such a 'holiday' now, and just passed the
       | 12 month mark. I don't feel that desire coming back anymore.
       | 
       | I've been blessed to have a friend that had a gig where I can do
       | some ETL and cover my monthly expenses, but whenever I start
       | looking for new jobs, reading the ads, all those keywords, all
       | those bullshit descriptions of what they expect, I'm starting to
       | develop a physical repulsion.
       | 
       | I've done a couple of interviews, and the HR discussions and then
       | the technical interviews have left me with a bitter taste in my
       | mouth. I'm afraid I'll hiss in the next zoom call. And it's not
       | even for not getting accepted, as I got an offer from all the
       | talks. But the whole industry gives me a bad taste right now.
       | Everything just feels futile and fluffed up. My last interview
       | was for a hair & beauty appointment app start-up where they acted
       | like they cure cancer.
       | 
       | I'd like to be my old self, but I'm afraid I might not get that
       | part back. I took a look at 'regular' jobs and the idea of being
       | a truck driver lit up something in me that programming hasn't in
       | a very long time. Even being a shop clerk makes me dream more
       | than wrangling code.
       | 
       | I realize this is childish, and that the grass is always greener
       | on the other side. I know that there are challenges in every
       | profession and that I have a comfortable home office and get paid
       | a shit ton of money for what I do and this is better than 99% of
       | the planet.
       | 
       | I just hope to be able to get back on track mentally and not feel
       | like this.
        
         | doodaddy wrote:
         | I always suspected I had a doppelganger but this proves it.
         | Aside from the 6-12 breaks between each job I could have sworn
         | this post was my own. I'm on the tail end of a sabbatical that
         | is running far into overtime for the same reason - for the past
         | year+ I've waited for the energy and desire to return as I
         | expected it surely would.
         | 
         | But no. Nothing. Reading a job req still induces a wince.
         | Reading the fluff from and about companies sends me recoiling.
         | These things were never pleasant but they were tolerable. Now,
         | the limbo bar has been set too low and it's getting harder to
         | compel my body to contort enough to slip under.
         | 
         | I'm pretty sure there is an eventual return somewhere ahead and
         | the scariest thought is that I'll get back and swirl back down
         | to life as it was before. The past year+ becomes a puff of a
         | memory. The good news (!) is that knowing you feel this way is
         | critical knowledge. With that understanding we can rearrange
         | our values and tackle the feeling constructively.
        
       | chairmansteve wrote:
       | When I was younger, I always had 6 months of living expenses in
       | the bank, a cheap life style, and a willingness to work (and a
       | lot of experience of) menial jobs.
       | 
       | That meant that going in to work every day was a choice, not an
       | obligation. More than once, I quit a job and took a break.
       | 
       | These days, with mortgage, kids etc, I still maintain the escape
       | hatch.
        
       | purple-leafy wrote:
       | I think I've found the remedy to my experience of burnout.
       | 
       | I burnt out hard last year and earlier this year (frontend dev).
       | Mental exhaustion, dissatisfaction with work and colleagues, and
       | especially the boss at the time.
       | 
       | I made several major changes to fix this.
       | 
       | - Dropped to 32 hours in my contract (with pay cut)
       | 
       | - Requested to move teams (request fulfilled)
       | 
       | - Deep dived into my weak areas that were causing work stress
       | 
       | - A short holiday
       | 
       | Now I'm happy as can be. Sure I earn 20% less now, but it's just
       | money. I now have a 50% longer weekend (2 days -> 3 days) AND a
       | 20% shorter work week (5 days -> 4 days)
       | 
       | This is the best move I have ever made.
       | 
       | Working 5 days a week is a grind, no matter which way you slice
       | the pie. It's a marathon that never ends. I think it's okay for
       | most jobs, but in dev jobs you can't be on autopilot. So often
       | I'm solving bugs that haven't been seen before.
       | 
       | A 4 day week doesn't seem much different on the surface, but it's
       | a major change. It no longer feels like a marathon. I actually
       | get more work done comparatively, as I'm more focused and less
       | stressed.
       | 
       | Furthermore, I've stopped doing projects that relate to my normal
       | stack in my spare time.
       | 
       | In my ample spare time, I deep dive C programming and graphics.
        
         | abnercoimbre wrote:
         | > In my ample spare time, I deep dive C programming and
         | graphics.
         | 
         | Noice. Join the Handmade Network [0] and/or Handmade Cities
         | [1]. You'll be in great company.
         | 
         | [0] https://handmade.network
         | 
         | [1] https://handmadecities.com
        
       | nonameiguess wrote:
       | I try to keep perspective, anyway.
       | 
       | My first real job while living away from my parents was being a
       | performer at Disneyland. It was actually fun as fuck, but they
       | scaled back the entertainment department after 9/11, laid off a
       | bunch of people, and that included me. In a relatively low-paying
       | job with no savings, I couldn't make rent and had to live out of
       | my car for a month and rely completely on the kindness and
       | generosity of others to get back on my feet.
       | 
       | Right after college, I managed a bar for a while. Again, very
       | fun, but it's hard not to drink too much, especially when very
       | young and very stupid. I woke up one morning blacked out with a
       | dent in my car and still have no idea what happened. I got to
       | witness women I hired being pressured into shooting for a
       | swimsuit calendar I could tell they didn't want to do. Rich kid
       | assholes utterly ruin people's lives out of pure spite. The owner
       | made me fire a woman for theft when I knew she was innocent.
       | 
       | I eventually joined the Army. Again, quite a bit of fun charging
       | around on top of tanks, firing a .50 caliber machine gun and
       | standing on top of a cannon, in a vehicle that can go right
       | through 6-foot diameter trees like they aren't even there. But my
       | buddy's gunner got hit by a rocket and he had to spend two days
       | cleaning barely differentiated guts off of everything in the
       | conex. Guy in my platoon shot himself on the last day of
       | deployment because his wife was leaving him and he didn't want to
       | go home. I was in the last unit to leave Iraq, and seeing what
       | happened after, and then adding Afghanistan on top of that. Man,
       | if you feel like you suffered for nothing, this was just next
       | level 'what the fuck did we do all this for?' 20-hour shifts with
       | 30 minutes of sleep a night if you got lucky. Zero days off for
       | months on end. Marriages ruined left and right. I even got my own
       | thankfully amicable, no kids at least divorce out of it.
       | 
       | I ended up with pretty horrible chronic spine problems that led
       | to multiple interbody fusions, a whole lot of titanium hardware,
       | and years being barely able to walk, often in enough pain that my
       | entire personality palpably changed and I felt powerless to stop
       | it. When the Army tried to treat me, they put me in traction to
       | the point that it herniated worse, I passed out on the machine,
       | and fell so hard onto the hospital floor that I got a TBI bad
       | enough that I wasn't allowed to drive for two months until I
       | could prove I was able to stand straight and touch my hand to a
       | moving pencil. I went back to my hometown and totally forgot
       | entire people existed who had apparently been huge parts of my
       | life. I have no idea how many memory holes I have as I
       | continually discover them talking to my family. Got 0% from the
       | VA for that one.
       | 
       | I'm not here for the pain Olympics or anything and don't want to
       | downplay the struggles of others, but being in software is the
       | cushiest, easiest shit I could ever have imagined. I'm paid more
       | than I ever would have thought possible without running my own
       | business or being a surgeon when I was a kid. I work from home
       | with all the free time in the world but still travel enough that
       | I'm not just sitting in the same room every day forever. I very
       | rarely work more than a 40 hour week or 8 hour day. The vast
       | majority of what I work on goes nowhere and ends up abandoned or
       | canceled, but every now and then, something makes it to fruition
       | and I get to see it used and feel legitimate pride knowing I made
       | it happen. People nominally above me in an org chart are
       | deferent, polite, constantly asking if they can do anything for
       | me. People just believe me when I say something.
       | 
       | Contrast this with the Army where it's legal, in-line with normal
       | culture, and all but expected that bosses will publicly humiliate
       | you, yell at you in front of your coworkers, you're constantly
       | under a spotlight, stack ranked annually against your entire
       | battalion by people who don't even know you. You'll get fired if
       | you can't run fast enough or get fat. I got yelled at and
       | censured once for not returning a call from my commander within
       | five minutes when I was mowing my damn lawn and didn't hear the
       | phone ring. You have literally no time off, whether or not you're
       | home or out of town. Continuous mandatory recall. I was called in
       | to bail guys out of prison at 3 AM on a Sunday morning. You
       | rotate through 24-hour shifts called "staff duty" once a month
       | because someone has to always be present in the headquarters. You
       | don't get a day off the next day.
       | 
       | Software developers have absolutely no appreciation of how good
       | they have it.
        
       | jpcookie wrote:
       | You know what? If you don't like your job I'll take it. Seriously
       | that's what I wanted to do since I was a teenager. Now I spend my
       | time counting other people's money. That's an even worse life.
        
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