[HN Gopher] Starting Hospice
___________________________________________________________________
Starting Hospice
Author : jdkee
Score : 804 points
Date : 2024-08-05 03:35 UTC (19 hours ago)
(HTM) web link (jakeseliger.com)
(TXT) w3m dump (jakeseliger.com)
| jseliger wrote:
| Hacker News, thank you for all the links and all the great
| reading. Now I have to say goodbye.
|
| I'm with my wife Bess (https://bessstillman.substack.com/) and my
| brother Sam, and crying, but it is okay. At the end of _Lord of
| the Rings_ Gandalf says to the hobbits, "Go in peace! I will not
| say: do not weep; for not all tears are an evil." And that is how
| I feel now. Ending prematurely hurts, but all things must end,
| and my time to end is upon me.
| isotropy wrote:
| Thank you for sharing so much of yourself with us these past
| months.
| block_dagger wrote:
| Gandalf also said, "End? No, the journey doesn't end here.
| Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey
| rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver
| glass, and then you see it."
| chrisweekly wrote:
| Great quote.
|
| Also, props for a cool personal blog and project list, I'm
| listening to Phasmaphobe now... congrats on creating and
| publishing a full-length album! No easy feat.
| davidrupp wrote:
| He did? I'm surprised to find a quote I'm not familiar with.
| On what page of which edition did he say this?
| simeonf wrote:
| Gandalf says this in the movies, not in the book. However
| the descriptive language is drawn from Frodo's dream in the
| barrow downs and his experience sailing into west at the
| end of LOTR.
|
| > And then it seemed to him that as in his dream in the
| house of Bombadil, the grey rain-curtain turned all to
| silver glass and was rolled back, and he beheld white
| shores and beyond them a far green country under a swift
| sunrise.
| The_Colonel wrote:
| But "sailing into the west" is not a metaphor for death,
| Valinor is not a metaphor for heaven (as it's a real
| place within LOTR world where e.g. Frodo dies). Gandalf's
| movie quote does not appear to be based on book material.
| voisin wrote:
| Jake, I am so, so sorry for everything you've gone through and
| wish peace for you and the best for your loved ones. I've
| followed your story here and always been touched by your
| candor. Thank you for all your contributions. I was rooting for
| a better outcome and am sorry that it hasn't arrived. Goodbye.
| SOLAR_FIELDS wrote:
| See you in another life, brother. So long, and thanks for all
| the fish.
| bfdm wrote:
| Thanks for sharing your journey with the world. I haven't read
| them all, but I have read several and while terrifying I know
| they will help others navigating similar journeys.
|
| Rest well and all the love for those close to you.
| girvo wrote:
| Rest easy, and thank you for sharing your experience with us.
| I've read your words for such a long time now, and I'm happier
| for it; thank you again
| sydbarrett74 wrote:
| Jake, no matter what happens in the days ahead, I wish you
| peace and equanimity. Thank you for sharing your journey with
| the world.
| HaZeust wrote:
| Thank you Jake, it's been real to follow these developments.
|
| You've touched a lot of us, and if leaving impressionable
| impacts on others is the highest quantifiable order in this
| life -- I think this was a job very well done :) and you've
| inspired many to continue that cycle. Rest well, see you on the
| other side.
| Herodotus38 wrote:
| Thank you for your posts. They meant a lot to me and I will use
| them to try and help others. They have helped me.
| moshegramovsky wrote:
| You inspired me to make changes I needed to make.
|
| Infinite love to you and your family.
| fady0 wrote:
| Thank you for everything Jake, See you on the other side
| stavros wrote:
| This really sucks. I don't know you, but I don't want this for
| you, but there's nothing I can do.
| slazaro wrote:
| I've been reading your writings for a few months and I can
| assure you that you're on a lot of strangers' minds, passively
| making positive change in other people. I wish all the best to
| you and your family.
| vinnyvichy wrote:
| Thank you for pieces such as the following one on the
| unreasonable promise of mRNA vaccines and the right to try new
| treatments:
|
| https://jakeseliger.com/2023/07/22/i-am-dying-of-squamous-ce...
| .
|
| HN discussion:
|
| https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=36827438
| noobermin wrote:
| Wishing you the best Jake. Thanks for sharing your story with
| us. I sort of believe the little bit of what Douglas Hofstadter
| said in _I am a strange loop_ , essentially, small bits of your
| soul live on in the rest of us who read your story and
| interacted with you here.
| popupeyecare wrote:
| Thank you. You don't know me but your story and life has had a
| profound impact on my perspective on what's important. Thank
| you.
| zuckerma wrote:
| Amen.
| vertis wrote:
| It has been heartbreaking to follow, but all the same an
| important documentation. You are a true hero. I am at a loss to
| know what else to say.
| 2OEH8eoCRo0 wrote:
| Thanks for sharing. Your dignity and courage is inspiring.
| dthrowaway819 wrote:
| Hey this might be kind of a weird thing to say but screw it.
| I've been suicidal recently and seriously considered ending my
| life. One reason I have decided to hold on and get help is
| inspiring stories like your own. I look at how much dignity,
| energy, and love you have espoused even while having a terminal
| illness and I feel ashamed. Some people out there have been
| given so little and done amazing things with it, and I've been
| given so much and done nothing. In this strange way I feel like
| I owe you something even though you're a stranger on the
| Internet. I want to be someone like you who is strong. Just
| wanted to let you know that.
| swombat wrote:
| With love, please consider - the "shame" you're describing is
| really something else in a mask.
|
| Perhaps... a longing? Maybe this stranger has helped you find
| the place where you do truly long for life.
|
| Let the feeling be. Don't label it shame. Don't label it
| longing. Just let it be. Give it space. Cry if you feel like
| it. Laugh if you feel like it. Just feel it.
|
| And when you're ready to speak about this with others, there
| will be many, many willing to be there for you. You are
| loved.
| mjdiloreto wrote:
| Another perspective: shame can be good. Feel it. Shame for
| who you are can light a fire in you, can propel you into
| transformation. Shame for one's past self is normal, if one
| has undergone any growth, and in time one may forgive
| himself. But not now, not when you know yourself and you
| see all the ways you are lacking. Not when you are so
| wholly disappointed in your life that you want to end it.
| _Longing_ for a different life will not result in change.
| Shame, and deeply ruminating on it can. In time you will
| transform and can forgive the past self you are ashamed of,
| but not now in your time of desperate need.
| smogcutter wrote:
| I think it's worth drawing a distinction between guilt,
| which can be positive, and shame, almost never. Guilt is
| feeling badly because you know you've done wrong. Shame
| is feeling badly because _other people_ know you've done
| wrong.
| mjdiloreto wrote:
| I still feel shame can be noble. To try to live up to the
| example of others and feel ashamed that you are not
| anywhere near their greatness. Not guilty, because you
| have not done wrong, but shame, because you are not
| enough compared to another.
| petercooper wrote:
| I've been reading Five Chimneys by Olga Lengyel, a Holocaust
| survivor who went through the most terrible of ordeals. She
| became suicidal and a Frenchman who got her involved in the
| camp resistance told her that if there were just one reason
| not to do it, it was so she could do little things to make
| the lives of people around her better. She took this to heart
| and it pushed her through to eventual liberation and living
| till her 90s. I appreciate words are cheap, but I found this
| inspiring and a good way to think about life when all else
| seems lost.
| klohto wrote:
| Please don't be ashamed for your thoughts, nor feelings. Each
| of us have struggles of our own and we cannot compare our
| paths or strength with others. Just because some people cope
| differently, doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you or
| the way you process pain. Each of us is unique, with our own
| backstory.
|
| I have recently also struggled with the decision whether to
| end my life. I was afraid to seek help and to talk to a
| professional.
|
| If you ever feel like you need someone to listen or just talk
| to, please reach out at Twitter or at <username>@gmail.com
| A_D_E_P_T wrote:
| Your fighting spirit and clarity of mind have been an
| inspiration. Very few patients struggle on their own behalves
| as you and Bess have done -- and in _such_ a flawed and
| labyrinthine medical-regulatory environment. Thank you for
| writing about it... I only wish they had made things easier for
| you. And I hope that the coming days bring peace and comfort.
| toomuchtodo wrote:
| Take care Jake. It was a privilege to follow along, and I wish
| you peace on your journey.
| dredmorbius wrote:
| Thanks for everything you've written, it will be a useful
| legacy to many.
|
| Take care of you and yours as you can. My thoughts are with you
| and Bess who has been a true champion through your ordeal.
| ridgeguy wrote:
| Godspeed, Jake. Thank you.
| reagan83 wrote:
| Go in peace. Through your writing you've made a positive impact
| on me, and I'm sure others in your time here. That's all any of
| us ever hope to do. Go in peace.
| exmadscientist wrote:
| Always appreciated seeing your "byline" on things around here
| and elsewhere. I'll miss you.
|
| Good luck, to the extent that's even possible anymore.
| username135 wrote:
| See ya on the other side. Or not.
| docstryder wrote:
| You have been such an inspiration in how to make something
| impossible almost bearable. You are doing the hardest of hard
| things so well. Thank you for sharing and hope you find peace
| keeptrying wrote:
| Thank you for your writing - its taught me a lot about a lot of
| things. One concrete highlight is how important patient agency
| is in the patient-doctor relationship - which you've written
| about a few times.
|
| I'm truly deeply sorry about this whole situation. Thank you
| for sharing all your knowledge.
| jseliger wrote:
| I hope too to accomplish at least two concrete ends:
|
| 1. Help and educate other people who are suddenly facing the
| opaque clinical-trial system:
| https://bessstillman.substack.com/p/please-be-dying-but-
| not-...
|
| 2. Ultimately, reform and speed FDA approval for fatal
| diseases like recurrent / metastatic head and neck cancers:
| https://jakeseliger.com/2024/01/29/the-dead-and-dying-at-
| the.... A drug like petosemtamab (MCLA-158), which I was on
| from Sept. 27 2023 to March 29 2024, should already be
| approved, instead of continuing to wander around in clinical
| trials.
| melling wrote:
| Have you discussed anything about targeted therapies? For
| example, how the different genetic makeup of some tumors
| are used to treat them. Keytruda comes to mind.
|
| https://www.keytruda.com/
|
| Antibody drug conjugates also seem to be discussed often:
|
| https://www.mdanderson.org/cancerwise/antibody-drug-
| conjugat...
| adamredwoods wrote:
| In his blog, he discusses Keytruda.
| https://jakeseliger.com/2023/12/19/what-if-things-go-
| right-w...
| kragen wrote:
| goodbye. thank you for everything you've given us
| jkuria wrote:
| All the best to you Jake
| andyjohnson0 wrote:
| Thank you for sharing your journey, Jake. Go well, with peace
| and love.
| egeres wrote:
| Thank you for writing such a transparent and deeply touching
| essay. Even if it was painful to read because the topic feel
| unsettling to me, it made me reflect a lot about life and
| gratefulness. I look forward to read the rest of the things you
| have posted
| epiccoleman wrote:
| Reading your updates has been important to me since I started
| seeing your posts.
|
| Thank you for taking the time and energy during the most
| difficult of circumstances to share your journey with the rest
| of us. I know it's given me a lot to think about and a lot to
| be grateful for.
|
| Best of luck to you and yours as you come to the end of the
| journey. You'll be in my thoughts.
| sizzle wrote:
| Thank you for sharing your story, may the end come peacefully
| with family at your side, wishing you a safe journey to where
| we all must go someday to be reunited. My heartfelt condolences
| brother.
| renewiltord wrote:
| Thank you for all the work and sharing your journey.
| alspaca wrote:
| Absolutely heartbreaking. Your writing has been a gift. Thank
| you for everything.
| bigDinosaur wrote:
| Thank you for your writing. I'm sorry it has come to this, and
| I don't quite know what to write other than that you've
| provided lots of valuable insight to an area I was unaware of.
| anatoly wrote:
| Thank you for everything.
| adamredwoods wrote:
| I watched your efforts and have tried applying them to my loved
| one. To be human, to be one with intelligence to figure things
| out as you have, the digital touch you have made, thank you. Go
| in peace.
| wheelerwj wrote:
| "I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do
| I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But
| that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to
| do with the time that is given us."
|
| Godspeed, enjoy your family.
| sudohackthenews wrote:
| Thanks for everything Jake. I only have a vague understanding of
| what you are going through after seeing my grandma go through
| some of the same things, yet I still can't imagine how hard it is
| for you and your family.
|
| Wishing you and Bess all the best and if you or her need anything
| feel free to reach out. Godspeed
| geocrasher wrote:
| 3 and 1/2 years ago I lost my mate prematurely. A long protracted
| illness with much pain and suffering. I'm sorry for you and your
| wife are going through and have gone through. It is very hard.
|
| There were a lot of things that helped me through. If your wife
| would ever like to talk to someone who's been through it, even
| though I'm a guy, she is always welcome to reach out to me.
|
| Username at gmail.
| kstrauser wrote:
| Bless ya, Jake. Go be comfortable now, and may you and Bess both
| have peace.
| anthonygarcia21 wrote:
| Thank you to you and Bess for your writing and sharing your story
| with the world. I have found it to be personally very helpful.
| monero-xmr wrote:
| Here's a couple mind-bending NDE experience reports from doctors:
|
| https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JL1oDuvQR08
|
| https://youtu.be/gpfriTZDWCY?t=2777
|
| See you on the other side
| bhhaskin wrote:
| Thank you for sharing these.
| dl9999 wrote:
| These are very interesting.
|
| I used to be convinced that NDEs were either made up, or the
| brain rebooting or something like that. I'm not so sure about
| it anymore. I'm not religious (not anti-religious either), but
| there are a lot of options between nothingness and a religious
| expectation of an afterlife. Maybe these NDEs are indicators of
| something else. I was surprised to see that almost 20% of
| people that "die" report them.
| https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6172100/
|
| Thanks for posting these.
| Bluestein wrote:
| > options between nothingness and a religious expectation of
| an afterlife.
|
| May I ask what you consider some of those are? Honestly
| curious.-
| leetrout wrote:
| I highly recommend this film "Griefwalker" to anyone anytime
| death comes up. I find Stephen's views fascinating and for an end
| that meets us all we sure like to avoid talking about death.
|
| https://www.nfb.ca/film/griefwalker/
| sva_ wrote:
| For me it's The Fountain.
| DaoVeles wrote:
| I have always like the quote "Death the price of entry you pay on
| the exit". We all have to pay it at some point. All that matters
| is that you had a grand time.
|
| Take it easy. Have a laugh where you can. Embrace the love. And
| take that final curtain call like a champ!
| jsgih wrote:
| Good wishes to you and your friends and family.
| masteruvpuppetz wrote:
| Reminds me of Novaspirit Tech's announcement that he's got cancer
| :( [1]
|
| So sorry to hear these incredible people's sufferings
|
| [1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aFh5AuV_CJU
| floam wrote:
| Thank you Jake. I hope at the end they can just .. ignore any
| best practices of responsible narcotics dosing.
| katzenversteher wrote:
| I do not know you, but I'd like to send you and your family my
| best wishes and empathy.
| voidpointercast wrote:
| You put words onto page with which given a thousand I could not
| have equaled. We will all follow, in time. "I
| see life as a roadside inn where I have to stay until the coach
| from the abyss pulls up. I don't know where it will take me,
| because I don't know anything. I could see this inn as a prison,
| for I'm compelled to wait in it; I could see it as a social
| center, for it's here that I meet others. But I'm neither
| impatient nor common. I leave who will to stay shut up in their
| rooms, sprawled out on beds where they sleeplessly wait, and I
| leave who will to chat in the parlors, from where their songs and
| voices conveniently drift out here to me. I'm sitting at the
| door, feasting my eyes and ears on the colors and sounds of the
| landscape, and I softly sing - for myself alone - wispy songs I
| compose while waiting. Night will fall on us all
| and the coach will pull up. I enjoy the breeze I'm given and the
| soul I'm given to enjoy it with, and I no longer question or
| seek. If what I write in the book of travellers can, when read by
| others at some future date, also entertain them on their journey,
| then fine. If they don't read it, or are not entertained, that's
| fine too."
|
| Fernando Pessoa, The Book of Disquiet
| delichon wrote:
| Your courage in not withdrawing in your sickness, of being open
| with all of us about your journey and what you've learned, is
| heroic. It's an amazing example of how to be a mensch to leave
| behind for your daughter.
| ChrisMarshallNY wrote:
| Thanks so much for sharing your struggles and wisdom.
|
| I feel the world is a better place, for this kind of thing.
| selimthegrim wrote:
| I learned a lot from you Jake. I hope you two see each other on
| the other side.
| jrh3 wrote:
| God bless you and your family. You are a brave man who has helped
| many.
| j_bum wrote:
| Rest easy. My thoughts are with you and your family.
|
| Your words have made a wide impact on this corner of the
| internet, and I'm lucky to have experienced them.
| causi wrote:
| If our civilization survives, we will, one day, through one
| manner or another, banish death. If that day comes, when it
| comes, I hope Jake's name is remembered for the monument to all
| who we lost, all of us who've had to grow and live and find
| meaning under the specter.
| Bluestein wrote:
| > If our civilization survives,
|
| ... that is to - perhaps - say "if we manage to survive the
| 'collective' death that seems oftentimes inevitable" ...
|
| > we will, one day, through one manner or another, banish
| death.
|
| How do I ever wish I had your certainty - I do not mean it as a
| backhanded criticism. I mean it literally.-
| kelnos wrote:
| I don't know about banishing death entirely, but I do believe
| (echoing the sentiment of "if our civilization survives")
| that we'll significantly, massively increase life expectancy
| in the next century (like by a factor of two or more), and/or
| discover how to digitize or preserve brains to the degree
| that we'll be able to live on in some capacity beyond the
| deaths of our bodies.
|
| If this does turn out to be true, it's a bummer that
| many/most of us alive today are likely too early to benefit
| from it.
| DiggyJohnson wrote:
| Be well. I'm so glad you are with people that care.
| bironran wrote:
| Lost my wife about 1.5 years ago. It was expected and unexpected
| at the same time. Long metastatic cancer treatment that ended all
| of the sudden, in a few weeks of unconsciousness ("coma") with an
| auto immune brain disease, likely caused by chemo.
|
| As the partner left behind, I nothing but empathy to Bess. As an
| avid, ultra pragmatic, HN reader though, I've gathered resources
| so I'll list them here:
|
| Forums / chats:
|
| https://www.reddit.com/r/widowers/ - This one I used immediately
| after. Yelling into the void. Crying. Having other people cry
| with me. Make sure I'm heard.
|
| https://discord.gg/CFQfCdby - /r/widowers discord. This one is
| "good" for the first few days / weeks / months, when the pain is
| great and the sense of lost is overcoming and you just need
| someone to talk with, someone who's been through this, right now.
| Everyone is friendly, rules to keep things sane and not
| triggering are in effect.
|
| Facebook groups - I know, ugh. But it helps to see other people
| in the same boat. Somehow. A little. For me it was "Young and
| Widowed With Children" (well, me) and some of the black humor
| groups e.g. "Widow(er) Humor". Find your tribe. It really does
| help.
|
| Books:
|
| It's ok you're not ok - https://www.amazon.com/Its-That-Youre-
| Not-Understand/dp/1622... - This is "the book". Everyone
| recommends it and it's justified. If you can't bring yourself to
| read, get the audible version. I did, it was easier to lie in bed
| with eyes closed.
|
| Irreverent Grief Guide -
| https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08L5RRJ9D - this one is a "how
| to" guide. I mean a real "how to", emotionally. I, and possibly
| many on /r/widowers/ found it priceless.
|
| Videos:
|
| https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzOvi0Aa2EA - Huberman labs - a
| really short video on how your brain needs to reorient itself
| after loss.
|
| Kids:
|
| "The widow's survival guide" - https://www.amazon.com/Widows-
| Survival-Guide-Living-Children... - "you're not alone in the
| mess" kind of book. Again, audible version available.
|
| Kids' books (mine was 3.5 so YMMV):
|
| Reread over and over: - The invisible string -
| https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/031648623X - Fix-it man -
| https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1925335348 - Missing
| mummy - https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0230749518 - The
| sad dragon - https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1948040999 -
| Something very sad happened -
| https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1433822660
|
| Read once or twice: - Love is forever -
| https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0615884059 - I'll See You
| In The Moon - https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1989123309
| - My heart will stay -
| https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0578794578 - The heart
| and the bottle - https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0399254528
| - Always remember - https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0399168095
| - The garden of lost balls -
| https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0BLQW27XX - Gone but
| never forgotten - https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09SNY9VF3
|
| Therapy and meds:
|
| Actually, therapy and meds before, if not already. Anticipatory
| grief is a thing and processing it can make later days a bit
| easier. Anti anxiety meds (NDRI) can create "inoculation" effect
| to some extent. SSRIs probably as well. Understand depression,
| the symptoms, the issues. Educate family and friends. Establish
| rapport with a therapist.
|
| Friends and community:
|
| Expect loss of friends. It's terrible but it happens a lot.
| Extremely common that friends will silently disappear after a few
| days or weeks. Not even just joint friends. People are awkward
| around grief. Community, however, does seem to work well. Rely on
| them. Don't say no to food offers, it helps. Doordash! Don't be
| shy about it, it's fine to eat junk food. Don't drink though and
| don't get high, it deepens and prolongs the grief symptoms.
|
| Calls:
|
| Don't forget your family or close friends. I've had daily calls
| with my sister. It helped a ton. Scheduled daily calls.
| bironran wrote:
| Forgot to add: Journaling helped me a lot. I favored writing
| this as "letters" / "texts" to my wife. As if she's here, just
| telling her about my day, feelings, emotions, what our kid did,
| what happened around us, family and friends. Venting, crying,
| blaming, being frustrated, being happy, being proud. All goes
| in there.
| chrisweekly wrote:
| All love and solidarity your way. Thank you for your courage and
| kindness.
| viking123 wrote:
| Thank you for everything.
|
| My mom just passed from ALS and now this. It's so unfair that we
| have essentially no working treatments for these, even though
| they always tout how advanced medicine is but I feel like it
| really is not advanced at all
| NeutralForest wrote:
| Hi Jake, I lost my father to cancer this year, he was 59. I hope
| you know your memory lives with the people that are with you, now
| and in the future. I understand what your family is going through
| even though I can't understand your pain, thanks for putting your
| writings out there, take care.
| bufordtwain wrote:
| Just wanted to say thank you and farewell. You are in good hands
| with hospice.
| SoftTalker wrote:
| Sad reminder that we are all here for a limited time and we don't
| really know how long that will be.
| Taikonerd wrote:
| Goodbye, Jake. I enjoyed your blog, and I felt like I knew you,
| in the way one does when one spends hours reading someone else's
| thoughts.
|
| I'll miss you.
| starkparker wrote:
| My partner died of an internal SCC in their early 40s during the
| COVID-19 pandemic lockdowns, over a course of 9 months.
|
| After the tumor board of the only cancer treatment center both
| covered by our insurance and willing to take us on refused to
| pursue anything but standard ovarian chemotherapy (which didn't
| work at all on ovarian SCC, which we already knew). Because of
| travel restrictions and the total lack of vaccines at the time,
| we couldn't travel to seek more aggressive treatment, so we
| pursued clinical trials.
|
| My partner qualified for a trial only after chemotherapy started
| doing nerve damage, and was approved only after being judged too
| ill by the oncologist to take the drugs when they finally
| arrived. The courier showed up with $20,000 of useless drugs two
| days before hospice started. After my partner's death, I was told
| to dump them, unopened, after begging the oncologist and company
| to find someone else who could use them.
|
| Bess' advocacy for access to trials for terminal and near-
| terminal patients is invaluable. If there's anything people can
| try to do, it's to help in this effort long before you or a loved
| one become too sick to benefit from it.
|
| Jake has a hard road ahead, and so does Bess. All we can do is
| push to make sure nobody else has to fight as hard for, or be
| outright refused, the ability to fight for even potentially
| effective treatment.
| hrkfmud50k wrote:
| that's a tragic story and I'm sorry for your loss. did you
| consider taking the medication anyway in defiance of the
| oncologist?
| joevandyk wrote:
| I hope this is an appropriate place to ask.
|
| Say I am eating well, exercising consistently, getting enough
| sleep.
|
| For a male in his 40s, what are the best bang-for-the-buck ways
| to detect cancer before it becomes life-threatening?
| cgijoe wrote:
| Talk to your doctor, and ask to be screened for all common
| cancers. A colonoscopy is in your future (I just had one). Also
| ask for a Prostate-Specific Antigen (PSA) Test. Also look into
| the HPV vaccine.
| bigDinosaur wrote:
| HPV vaccine has to be the biggest bang for buck. To anyone
| reading this, you should get it at any age because you likely
| haven't been exposed to _all_ the strains that e.g.
| Gardasil-9 protects you from. You should also get it if you
| 're male despite it being initially known as the cervical
| cancer vaccine because HPV causes oral cancers and you also
| don't want to potentially be a carrier.
| timr wrote:
| Don't do this. Nearly all cancer tests are overly sensitive,
| and not great at detecting the cancers you care about (the
| ones that will progress).
|
| If you run out and get a bunch of random cancer tests, you
| are basically ensuring that you will get unnecessary and
| painful treatment for a finding that probably wouldn't have
| harmed you in the first place.
|
| It's not a satisfying answer, but it's true. The reason most
| cancers are found late is because there's no effective
| alternative.
| doctoring wrote:
| Whole body MRI is fairly available in major metro areas, though
| not cheap and not very sensitive or specific.
|
| The Galleri blood test screens for a range of cancers
| (sensitivity varies by cancer) and is ~$900, although you need
| a doctor to order it. You also may not technically be within
| the intended use population unless you have some risk factors
| (e.g. you are older than 50, or have family history of cancer).
|
| Colonoscopy is a good idea, given the rising rates of colon
| cancer among younger adults.
| NotYourLawyer wrote:
| What a weird time to come across this blog. I went to the
| dermatologist _today_ for a biopsy. I'm gonna spend the next week
| obsessing and worrying about it until I get the results.
| UniverseHacker wrote:
| I wouldn't worry too much, while skin cancer is common, only
| about 1% of skin cancers are serious (melanoma), and even that
| has a 95% survival rate if you catch it early.
| rawland wrote:
| Thank you, jseliger. Thank you, HN.
|
| Often I feel very at home here. A community which designed ethics
| into its very core.
| breck wrote:
| In May 2024 you were very skeptical of ketones/ketosis, in favor
| of chemotherapy [0].
|
| Do you think it might be a good idea for others in your situation
| to learn about ketones from the atomic level up, and why there
| might be good first principle reasons based on physics,
| chemistry, and biology for people to be talking about this?
|
| Do not go gentle into that good night. Godspeed.
|
| [0] https://jakeseliger.com/2024/05/28/chemo-versus-carrots-
| when...
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