[HN Gopher] Useful and Overlooked Skills
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       Useful and Overlooked Skills
        
       Author : gmays
       Score  : 57 points
       Date   : 2024-06-15 15:08 UTC (7 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (collabfund.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (collabfund.com)
        
       | rednafi wrote:
       | The first one can also be extended with this corollary:
       | 
       | Quit complaining about every little thing, including the fact
       | that people will always complain about every little thing.
        
         | namaria wrote:
         | Also be charitable. Maybe the seemingly insufferable person is
         | just having a bad day. I know I don't want to be judged based
         | on some day or week I was off and irritable due to some set of
         | circumstances.
         | 
         | I chose to believe we're all doing our best.
        
           | WarOnPrivacy wrote:
           | > I chose to believe we're all doing our best.
           | 
           | Evidence tends to bear this out. People aren't walking around
           | with gobs of unused ability; they're usually performing about
           | where they're able.
           | 
           | As far as improvement goes, the easy improvements are done.
           | The ones that are left are either in progress or folks don't
           | know how to proceed.
           | 
           | So where do shortcomings fit into this? I believe faults
           | happen when someone has no significant impediment to better
           | behavior - but they refuse anyway.
           | 
           | I see this happen when negative conditioning has effected
           | someone; imaginary harms are so elevated that actual
           | good/harm is less recognizable.
        
             | keiferski wrote:
             | _Evidence tends to bear this out. People aren 't walking
             | around with gobs of unused ability; they're usually
             | performing about where they're able._
             | 
             | My experience has been the opposite. I think most people
             | are underperforming to their potential, mostly because they
             | lack social connections or knowledge to capitalize on it,
             | or even begin to take the first steps to capitalizing on
             | it. The number of intelligent people stuck in pointless
             | jobs is endless.
             | 
             | The tech startup world is a good example. There are so many
             | intelligent people which simply haven't even considered the
             | possibility of building a tech company, mostly because they
             | aren't exposed to it, don't have any friends or family
             | members doing it, etc. It's an unknown-unknown that has
             | nothing to do with ability.
             | 
             | It's more likely that those who are already successful like
             | to rationalize that "everyone is exactly where they should
             | be" as a way to justify their own positions.
        
               | WarOnPrivacy wrote:
               | > My experience has been the opposite.
               | 
               | > I think most people are underperforming to their
               | potential, mostly because [conditions]
               | 
               | It sounds like your experience is identical. You've
               | identified obstacles between what folks could do and what
               | they're doing now. Today, folks are doing what they can
               | with what they have.
               | 
               | Potential is always a measure of things that can't be
               | done now.
               | 
               | > It's more likely that those who are already successful
               | like to rationalize that "everyone is exactly where they
               | should be" as a way to justify their own positions.
               | 
               | I think this is something that gets imagined about other
               | people. Reading minds isn't a thing and there is a human
               | tendency to fill blanks.
        
           | Angostura wrote:
           | I like the IETF protocol maxim: Be conservative in what you
           | transmit, be liberal in what you accept
        
         | realusername wrote:
         | I've historically never been complaining and it's really bad
         | for carreer development, you end up in dead ends which nobody
         | wants to do and not rewarded for it.
         | 
         | While it's a useful skill for your personal life, it's not
         | really working in a company.
        
           | copperroof wrote:
           | Agreed. In my experience to do well in large companies you
           | need 2 properties and nothing else.
           | 
           | 1. Constantly complaining. This is like a high-visible fake
           | proxy for "high quality".
           | 
           | 2. Highly opinionated. In order to get your 3rd rate projects
           | through you need to fight tooth and nail for whatever
           | arbitrary set of things you are pushing.
           | 
           | Engineering prowess and the properties from the article are
           | nowhere on the list. The vast majority of principal+
           | engineers and essentially all upper management I have worked
           | with have these two traits. When you run into an exception
           | it's a blast of fresh air and a wonder they got past senior
           | engineering roles. As a disclaimer my sample size is 2
           | companies.
        
         | WarOnPrivacy wrote:
         | > Quit complaining
         | 
         | Conversely, I have found complaining to be a symptom of under-
         | utilization of natural troubleshooting skills. Redirecting them
         | toward solving problems takes 2 issues off the board.
         | 
         | I have also found complainers who were detail-oriented in a way
         | that they reliably handled the kind of maintenance tasks that
         | were often ignored.
         | 
         | Mostly I'm talking about complaints that come from a place of
         | powerlessness. I often find those folks are broadcasting clues
         | about where the they can be useful.
        
       | derlvative wrote:
       | The author clearly needs to add to his skills the ability to give
       | advice while not being condescending. In particular the bit about
       | how in the good old days everyone had excellent social skills and
       | calligraphy but now youngsters have done away with decency in
       | favor of smartphones.
        
         | mikewarot wrote:
         | In the "good old days", I had crap social skills, and my
         | handwriting was g*d-awful. The baseline has now moved so much
         | lower, I have no problems with either.
         | 
         | The set of norms is changing, some things are way easier than
         | they used to be, and others are way harder, as the technology
         | makes things previously impossible or impractical, the normal
         | way of doing things.
         | 
         | For example, I can reliably drive to novel places on the other
         | side of Chicagoland without a map.... something those raised on
         | Google maps just can't do. Once I've been somewhere, I can find
         | my way back again. I learn new areas quickly.
         | 
         | On the other hand, I'm not likely to know about some really
         | cool thing that was less than a mile from my location, unless I
         | drove past it at some point.
         | 
         | We used to spend hours every day interacting outside playing
         | with all the other kids on the block, exploring neighborhoods,
         | etc... that's almost entirely evaporated for many kids, in
         | exchange they are much more proficient in computer mediated
         | communications.
         | 
         | The thing I worry about the most is managing risks. We used to
         | take risks as kids, as part of that play and exploring, doing
         | stupid shit, and only getting our parents involved if things
         | went bad. Now with kids protected in a bubble from anything,
         | and having their lives mostly planned... reliably estimating
         | danger isn't as common a skill as it used to be.
        
           | derlvative wrote:
           | Hope your archaic abilities get you ahead in life!
        
           | WarOnPrivacy wrote:
           | > For example, I can reliably drive to novel places on the
           | other side of Chicagoland without a map.... something those
           | raised on Google maps just can't do. Once I've been
           | somewhere,
           | 
           | The shift away from physical maps is a primary factor in my
           | shift away from exploring.
        
           | syndicatedjelly wrote:
           | Rousseau's book _Emile_ was written in the mid-18th century
           | and talks about educating the youth. It 's interesting to
           | read about his view of education and the similarities and
           | differences to today. Your last paragraph makes me think you
           | would like that book.
        
         | syndicatedjelly wrote:
         | Learning from people one disagrees with, instead of finding
         | offense and misunderstanding, is another useful and overlooked
         | skill.
        
       | twodave wrote:
       | Also knowing when the thought doesn't actually count. Being
       | "well-meaning" at the expense of another person is not love. It
       | dismisses their needs as less important than your need to feel as
       | if you did some kind act.
        
       | ChrisMarshallNY wrote:
       | Well, it is a fund, so it's interesting how everything is cast
       | into economic/investment context.
       | 
       |  _> Respectfully interacting with people you disagree with.
       | 
       | > Confirmation bias gets easier when people are more connected.
       | But connectivity also means you'll also run into more people who
       | disagree with you. Benedict Evans: "The more the Internet exposes
       | people to new points of view, the angrier people get that
       | different views exist." Handling that challenge without digging
       | the hole deeper is one the 21st century's most important skills.
       | If you're not blessed with perfect empathy, the trick to opening
       | your mind to those you disagree with is to find people whose
       | views on one topic you respect - that checks the box in your head
       | that says "this person isn't totally crazy" - and debate them on
       | the topics you disagree about. Without the first step it's too
       | easy to write someone off before you've heard their full
       | argument._
       | 
       | I like that. I'd love to see more of it.
        
         | warcher wrote:
         | I am dismayed at the number of people I increasingly run into
         | online who I disagree with, where I'm unable to find common
         | ground with. I'm pretty sure this is a result of their online
         | identity being rather narrowly tuned to exclusively present
         | popular frames of mind that I reject wholesale, but I can't
         | afford to discount the unsettling possibility that it's me
         | who's lost the plot.
         | 
         | In the end, I'm only consoled by the fact that I'm the only one
         | of us who's asking that question. The people I'm referring to
         | are quite certain I'm the villain.
        
           | syndicatedjelly wrote:
           | This comment reveals a strange level of cognitive dissonance,
           | because it sounds like you're describing in others what you
           | actually see in yourself. Someone who does have a list of
           | things they reject wholesale, and refuses to find common
           | ground with others who believe in any of those things. And
           | then you conclude by assuming you're the only one who thinks
           | critically about this stuff.
           | 
           | For what it's worth, you do say some relatable things and
           | appear to be figuring out your own mind. Which we can all
           | relate to
        
       | paulpauper wrote:
       | A good skill is learning to specialize, or at least not being
       | adverse to it. Contrary to what you see online, the vast majority
       | of people who are successful on paper and who have good careers
       | and decent-sized nest eggs , do not have profound insights into
       | society, or are worldly or erudite people. They instead find
       | something that works and then hone in and refine that. Unlike the
       | generalists who dominate and seem to have all the status online,
       | they specialize at something and become good enough that they can
       | make a career at it.
        
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       (page generated 2024-06-15 23:02 UTC)