[HN Gopher] Juvenile great apes love to tease and annoy their el...
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Juvenile great apes love to tease and annoy their elders, study
       finds
        
       Author : pseudolus
       Score  : 153 points
       Date   : 2024-02-14 11:48 UTC (3 days ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (www.theguardian.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (www.theguardian.com)
        
       | 082349872349872 wrote:
       | Our teachers used to admonish us "no monkeying around" and "no
       | horse play". The literal connection for the first was pretty
       | obvious, even to us north american kids, but I was in my twenties
       | before I learned that the latter refers to geldings' preferred
       | method of play: biting little bits of fur off each others' faces.
        
       | yungporko wrote:
       | i've also seen this behaviour in rats, cats, and dogs. it's the
       | cutest thing ever.
        
         | topspin wrote:
         | Kittens are demonic and will pester adult cats for as long as
         | they can stay awake. Mature cats always end up taking refuge on
         | elevated perches kittens can't reach.
        
       | sieste wrote:
       | > From 75 hours of footage taken at San Diego and Leipzig zoos,
       | scientists documented 142 clear instances of great apes teasing
       | their compadres
       | 
       | Less than 2 teases per hour! I wish some juvenile homo sapiens I
       | know were that well behaved.
        
         | LoveMortuus wrote:
         | The article indicates that you might have to react sooner, for
         | them to stop sooner.
         | 
         | I remember when I was younger, and I did that, but because I
         | was their third child they were kind of already annoyed, so my
         | parents' reaction was immediate and usually quite shouty.
         | 
         | I do find it adorable seeing these juveniles annoy the elderly.
        
         | zmgsabst wrote:
         | Game theory tells us the most effective strategy is matching
         | their energy until they shift modalities.
         | 
         | Sometimes, adults deny this truth to their own detriment
         | because they're "smart" or "civilized".
        
           | sieste wrote:
           | Interesting, what's the game theory argument for this
           | strategy?
        
             | zmgsabst wrote:
             | Iterated prisoner's dilemma.
             | 
             | The optimal strategy is signaling alliance (to receptive
             | partners); after that, it's reciprocating behavior.
             | 
             | Teenagers (and many adults) aren't willing to ally, so
             | we're left with reciprocating. Until they accept being
             | allies is a good idea.
        
               | CrazyStat wrote:
               | Game theory does not tell us that tit for tat is
               | generally optimal. It tells us that it is optimal for a
               | specific game with specific rules and payouts.
               | 
               | It is a mistake to try to translate that to using a tit
               | for tat strategy in general, where the rules and payouts
               | are usually quite different.
        
               | _Algernon_ wrote:
               | It's not even always the optimal strategy playing
               | prisoner's dilemma. If all your opponents are playing
               | "always defect", playing Tit-for-tat will consistently
               | lose (because of the initial good-faith attempt at
               | cooperation).
        
               | knightoffaith wrote:
               | Right - if I recall, the story is that there were
               | computer-simulated tournaments in which different
               | strategies for playing the iterated prisoner's dilemma
               | were pitted against each other, and tit-for-tat is the
               | strategy that emerged to be the winner. So it's an
               | empirical result showing that it is generally the most
               | successful strategy, not mathematically shown to be
               | optimal against every strategy.
        
               | tremon wrote:
               | It's not about the specific game nor the specific payout.
               | When raising children, it's more important to
               | teach/demonstrate that negative behaviour does have
               | negative consequences.
        
           | pharrington wrote:
           | >Game theory tells us
           | 
           | What game is being played? What are the rewards for winning?
        
             | codersfocus wrote:
             | 1: Can I get their attention 2: Not being hassled for your
             | attention
        
       | keepamovin wrote:
       | Having a part-grey-beard manager role of a team with junior
       | software engineers, I can attest that this is true hahahahaha! :)
        
       | throw_pm23 wrote:
       | Oh, I have also seen this with the juvenile great apes in my
       | family.
        
         | jeffrallen wrote:
         | The only peace in this family of apes is when them big brother
         | ape and the little brother ape are in different places.
         | 
         | Sigh.
        
       | glimshe wrote:
       | Looking at my teenager kid and his friends, I question whether
       | teenagers are actually human...
        
       | tap-snap-or-nap wrote:
       | >If, for instance, a young ape teases another and the second one
       | does not respond, it tells the first individual how far one can
       | go with the second individual, providing vital information about
       | growing up within a social group and establishing hierarchies.
       | 
       | Will apply this at workplace.
        
       | prepend wrote:
       | It's funny being the parent of teenagers and witnessing this
       | behavior. It's frequently frustrating and hurtful so it helps to
       | realize that it's just part of life and not something truly
       | directed at me.
       | 
       | It's the simple things like ape genes, and having basic needs
       | met.
       | 
       | I kind of feel like it's all this little stuff that bubbles up.
       | Like keeping inflammation low in general.
        
       | BrandoElFollito wrote:
       | First, they annoy the elders.
       | 
       | Then when they grow up to be teenagers, they live in a cave and
       | communicate mostly through grunting. I am at this phase with my
       | children and I make inhumane efforts not to react and let it
       | flow.
       | 
       | I hope that when their brain actually fires up when they are 25
       | or 30, they will be nice kids who realize what their parents when
       | through to raise them.
       | 
       | Please comment only to confirm this, I am desperate.
        
         | thih9 wrote:
         | That is correct, at some point after 25 their behavior shifts.
         | The change is extreme, eventually they complain about other
         | child/teenage humans and forget they themselves were in that
         | stage not that long ago.
        
         | wenebego wrote:
         | Can confirm, you got this
        
         | heresie-dabord wrote:
         | The juveniles suffer from some of the weaknesses of their
         | parents and _all_ of the weaknesses of the species.
         | 
         | The context of the social group may also have instilled poor
         | social habits in both the juveniles and the elders.
         | 
         | When the elders have gathered enough simple experiences to
         | understand these factors clearly instead of simply seeing the
         | juveniles as being unquestionably destined for greatness in
         | Learning and Civilisation, it is likely that a real social bond
         | can be formed.
         | 
         | Improved communication and gestures of mutual caring have often
         | been observed subsequently.
        
         | beezlebroxxxxxx wrote:
         | I don't know the whole 25 thing seems to be just mainly be
         | something like a meme. You go out and you can meet extremely
         | personable, social, and polite, teens all the time. You can
         | also find the grunters. Sometimes it's just personality.
         | Sometimes it's dealing with puberty. Sometimes it's
         | genuflecting against authority. As long as you support them,
         | give them guidance in a respectful way, and involve yourself in
         | their interests, most teens end up totally well adjusted by the
         | time they finish high-school.
         | 
         | (Also, I bet your teens would agree that your efforts are
         | "inhumane")
        
           | qball wrote:
           | >the whole 25 thing seems to be just mainly be something like
           | a meme
           | 
           | It comes from the same place "scientific" racism did. It's an
           | excuse to not even bother trying because "muh hormones".
           | 
           | Adult initiation rituals tend to be 13-14 in every pre-
           | industrial society (current and historic) because that's when
           | it happens biologically; it is therefore not a surprise, in
           | Western countries where it's delayed by a decade, that the
           | people from 14-25 are not developing correctly.
           | 
           | The first step to fixing this is to acknowledge the problem
           | exists.
        
             | wolverine876 wrote:
             | > Adult initiation rituals tend to be 13-14 in every pre-
             | industrial society (current and historic) because that's
             | when it happens biologically; it is therefore not a
             | surprise, in Western countries where it's delayed by a
             | decade, that the people from 14-25 are not developing
             | correctly.
             | 
             | I don't know how to define 'correctly' here, but in
             | politically and economically advanced countries they
             | develop in much more healthy and productive ways. People
             | who are forced to be adults at 15 often never get a chance
             | to mature.
        
             | DiscourseFan wrote:
             | I don't know, 25-30 happens to be the age at which most
             | people are having the most sex (at least statistically),
             | its a time when you are still sharp and horny and haven't
             | gotten bored of chasing sex but you have stupidly high
             | self-confidence and your whole life and the the whole world
             | ahead of you, when you become involved in real industry and
             | make some of the most important social connections in your
             | life.
             | 
             | It might be unique to our era (of capitalism), but its
             | definitely true that even if those teenagers _appear_ to be
             | polite, you must remember yourself what it was like to be a
             | teenager, how frustrated and angry and anxious you were all
             | the time, how little you really knew about the world, even
             | if you were nice in public. I don 't think those basic
             | impressions you get are definitive.
        
             | michaelmrose wrote:
             | Pre-industrial society was a horrifying murder fest that
             | gets worse the further you go back with people living in
             | prehistoric societies 9 times more likely to die of
             | violence. One needed to begin taking on responsibility very
             | early both because early societies needed every hand
             | available just to secure enough food but because you might
             | not have long.
             | 
             | The operation of such societies should be regarded as an
             | optimization for current circumstances rather than an
             | optimal strategy. If you think what we are doing is poorly
             | suited you are going to have to justify that position on
             | its own merits.
        
           | wolverine876 wrote:
           | One essential - existential - skill that children learn is to
           | please ADULTS (Authoritarian Domineering Unseeing Ludicrous
           | Tedious Superhypocritals). Their actual survival (food,
           | shelter, safety), their welfare, their happiness depends
           | extremely on Adults. If you were in their shoes in regard to
           | some authority - especially an authority that behaves as
           | badly as Adults - you would learn too.
           | 
           | They learn how to not upset Adults (and how to effectively
           | upset them too), how to be pleasing, how to stay out of
           | trouble, how to utterly lie and not get caught. Teens are
           | advanced children in this respect.
           | 
           | Now you might think you are too smart to be fooled, and that
           | of course is your downfall (didn't you read in school about
           | hubris and arrogance?). The kids are humans, it is very high
           | stakes for them and they study and hone every technique. For
           | them it is their most productive skill. You are massivly
           | outgunned. Adult.
           | 
           | You might think you are good-willed and trustworthy, but you
           | are inescapably an _Adult_. You have that unchecked power and
           | have been corrupted by it. Even if you are truly a friend now
           | you can switch on that power in a moment if something bothers
           | you, at your whim, by your mood. It 's like petting an
           | unrestrained lion; no matter how calm and playful it seems,
           | licking you, nuzzling you, purring ... you are paying very
           | close attention and tailoring every move to its pleasure.
           | What if something scares it?
           | 
           | I work to maintain great empathy for children's position
           | (hard to do, because I am corrupted by unchecked power). When
           | interacting, I keep my mouth shut - a whispered syllable
           | dominates the conversation, even if to provoke resistance. I
           | listen attentively: are they speaking with their own voice,
           | for their own cause, of their own perspective? A good signal
           | is if it's too pleasing, if it fits so beautifully and
           | joyfully in my beliefs, relieving all tension - here is a
           | child who understands! Lol. Other people, especially with the
           | vastly different experience of a different generation and of
           | childhood, will have very different ideas and perspectives,
           | many hard to understand or uncomfortable. Just think what you
           | sound like to them.
           | 
           | When kids do that pleasing thing, what response do you see?
           | You see Adults compliment them - 'what fine children!' The
           | Adults are suckers, and if you think back to your teenage
           | years, you know it. Adults are so easy.
           | 
           | There's another issue here. I was once at a casual Adult
           | dinner party and a couple had brought their only child, a 13
           | year old. The child, as far as I could tell, was the Adults'
           | best friend and they said as much. I tried engaging the child
           | away from their parents and give them some space to be
           | themselves, to be valued as themselves. They said they wanted
           | to be there, with Adults (lol), because 'who wants to hang
           | out with 13 year olds?' So truly heartbreaking.
        
             | bdjsiqoocwk wrote:
             | Sorry your experience with kids left you so jaded. Not all
             | kids are like that.
        
         | kibwen wrote:
         | If your parents are still around, ask them how they dealt with
         | it when you were going through that phase.
        
         | jffhn wrote:
         | >when their brain actually fires up when they are 25 or 30
         | 
         | Their brain fires up at about 14, and soon starts to figure out
         | that life is actually a costume party, so they spend the next
         | decade in their cave pondering about it while making up their
         | costume, naturally grunting at you while you annoy them with
         | your mundane down-to-earth already-costumed person
         | considerations. Then at 25 or 30 their costume is ready and
         | they start playing with you childishly again.
         | 
         | "I was ashamed of myself when I realized life was a costume
         | party, and I attended with my real face." (Kafka)
         | 
         | "Parents who expect gratitude from their children (there are
         | even some who require it) are like those usurers who willingly
         | risk the capital to receive interest." (Kafka)
        
           | Solvency wrote:
           | ...so what's your costume?
        
             | jffhn wrote:
             | Kafka's costume, obviously.
        
             | riehwvfbk wrote:
             | A giant vermin
        
             | underlipton wrote:
             | Fursuit.
        
             | datameta wrote:
             | A human skin one-piece that looks suspiciously like my
             | biologically given body.
        
             | a_gnostic wrote:
             | One more layer than you...
        
             | wolverine876 wrote:
             | Intellectual, clever, technical, part of the knowing in-
             | crowd of smart people - in other words, a HN commenter.
        
             | throwanem wrote:
             | What's yours?
        
           | ptsneves wrote:
           | Both the op and the answer are great and even the plea is
           | inspiring.
           | 
           | OP I am still a parent of 2 toddlers but I came to realise at
           | almost 35 that I was an asshole to my parebts for a long part
           | of my life. It is one of my biggest personal shames. On the
           | other hand I believe such break up is needed to be willing to
           | brave the world independently. We are one weird species, is
           | my conclusion.
        
             | ProllyInfamous wrote:
             | >I came to realise at almost 35 that I was an asshole to my
             | parents for a long part of my life.
             | 
             | Two years ago, I helped my mother die (I was then still
             | thirty-something, she was sixty).
             | 
             | In such vulnerable situations, the honesty between our
             | coupling (dying mother to mortal son) left us in a constant
             | stream of mostly-happy tears.
             | 
             | Hearing your mother, on her months-away deathbed, describe
             | you as "a _bully_ , absolutely; sometimes even an
             | _asshole_. But I love that you mostly bullied _assholes_ ,
             | even your most-difficult brother (you could _always
             | humiliate him when he NEEDED it_ ) and even me, sometimes,
             | when I was acting out."
             | 
             | RIP, Mom; I miss You immensely, even these two years later,
             | but am so glad we were able to lessen the guilt and share
             | in being _human_.
             | 
             | >We are one weird species, is my conclusion.
             | 
             | Wishing you well in your futures.
        
           | xattt wrote:
           | > Their brain fires up at about 14, and soon starts to figure
           | out that life is actually a costume party ...
           | 
           | I read this in the voice of Douglas Adams.
        
           | ChuckMcM wrote:
           | I agree with this, the 'firing up of the brain' and puberty
           | are closely correlated in my experience as a child and as a
           | parent. I'm not well read on Kafka but it seems he would
           | agree as well.
        
         | ambyra wrote:
         | Probably the best thing for the young chimpanzees is to be out
         | of the house most of the time, be put into a bunch of
         | sports/programs. At that age they start to resent their
         | parents, and they learn a lot more when they're outside doing
         | stuff.
        
           | anonym29 wrote:
           | Forcing them to be out of the house is a great way to ensure
           | they never have the time to practice their expressed interest
           | in programming that can eventually lead to a lucrative
           | career.
        
             | mixmastamyk wrote:
             | I've tried to encourage that many times... doesn't seem to
             | be taking.
        
               | ambyra wrote:
               | Every kid I met hates/doesn't appreciate what their
               | parents do/are at all. Like 0. I think it's an
               | evolutionary adaptation.
        
             | bfncieezo wrote:
             | are you seriously arguing that children are better off in
             | front of a computer than playing sports with their friends?
        
               | bdjsiqoocwk wrote:
               | Seriously maybe? What's so special about playing sports
               | with friends? Why is that sooooo valuable? I never had an
               | interest in sports, and so I made friends with other kids
               | that had no interest in sports.
        
         | kingkawn wrote:
         | They are doing the reasonable thing to create differentiation
         | between their personality development and yours. They are
         | likely accurately identifying aspects of your behavior that are
         | maladaptive to growing up in their era. The alienation is an
         | effort to create room for themselves to become something else.
         | You can respect the wisdom of their inclinations, or continue
         | to prove them right by not doing so. Either way, they will make
         | themselves as they need.
        
         | anonym29 wrote:
         | Decreasingly-recent ex-teenager here. I was a pretty terrible
         | teenager but after my brain fired up, I made it clear to them
         | how grateful I was for the immense personal sacrifices they
         | both undertook to raise my siblings and I.
        
         | jvanderbot wrote:
         | Yes - 100% confirm based on my experience as a grunting ape,
         | and watching my nephew and nieces and cousins grow up. I have
         | toddlers now, and am dreading the upcoming cave phase, esp
         | because once they reach adulthood (real adulthood - 25/30),
         | I'll be dying age.
        
         | lp4vn wrote:
         | "Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they
         | judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them." -- Oscar
         | Wilde
         | 
         | For me it's exactly the opposite. When I was a teenager I was
         | always afraid and deferential of my parents, now I can't help
         | but see them as narcisistic and abusive.
        
         | y-c-o-m-b wrote:
         | Sounds like you'll skip the "trouble with the law and court
         | dates" phase of this. Congrats! You're doing great. I was not
         | so lucky.
         | 
         | A special shout out to Instagram and Tik Tok for the miserable
         | cherry on top. I hope those platforms implode before the next
         | child becomes a teen.
        
         | mrj wrote:
         | Confirmed, happily. My step-kids from my previous marriage are
         | reaching this age and after several years of grunt-only
         | communication, suddenly they are back in my life. It was
         | obviously hard for them and lots of things happened that were
         | out of any of our control, but even in this situation, they
         | came back. It's a joy.
        
         | djsavvy wrote:
         | 25 here. Thanks for the reminder to call my parents.
        
         | rayiner wrote:
         | > I hope that when their brain actually fires up when they are
         | 25 or 30, they will be nice kids who realize what their parents
         | when through to raise them.
         | 
         | My wife and I never had much anger towards our parents, but
         | whatever was there totally dissipated when we had our first
         | child.
         | 
         | I wonder if many millennials will never get that realization,
         | after having kids a decade later in life than their parents
         | did. We had our daughter in our mid-late 20s, as we were
         | finishing law school. By the time we had our boys 6 and 8 years
         | later, we had a house, we're established in our careers, etc.
         | The parenting experience later in life was very different, and
         | much easier--aside from less physical stamina--than it was
         | earlier in life.
        
       | smallerfish wrote:
       | Seems like a good thread in which to recommend Chimp Empire on
       | Netflix. It's beautifully shot, and quite dramatic. I wondered
       | whether they had manufactured some of the storylines from the
       | thousands of hours of footage, but according to a couple of
       | interviews with uninvolved scientists that I read, it mostly
       | checks out as an accurate portrayal.
        
       | amelius wrote:
       | Just give them iPads!
        
       | tempodox wrote:
       | So just like their human counterparts then.
        
       | xyst wrote:
       | Sounds about right. Humans also share this same behavior.
       | Unfortunately it's not only their familial elders but just any
       | older authority figure.
       | 
       | Little shits.
        
       ___________________________________________________________________
       (page generated 2024-02-17 23:01 UTC)