[HN Gopher] Lonely, but not always alone
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       Lonely, but not always alone
        
       Author : wjb3
       Score  : 5 points
       Date   : 2024-02-08 22:07 UTC (53 minutes ago)
        
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 (TXT) w3m dump (www.bps.org.uk)
        
       | wjb3 wrote:
       | Research from the US takes a look at the links between time spent
       | alone and loneliness, finding high levels of loneliness in those
       | that spend over 75% of their time with others.
        
         | dang wrote:
         | Please don't post summary comments like this. There has been an
         | uptick of them lately, and it's not a good trend for HN.
         | 
         | The idea of HN threads is good, curious conversation, and that
         | requires avoiding formulaic responses, even if they're well-
         | intentioned.
        
       | askew wrote:
       | I feel lonely in my new job, when I'm in the office. I don't work
       | directly with anybody there. There's hustle and bustle, and I
       | feel like the new kid.
       | 
       | I don't feel that when I'm elsewhere.
        
         | StormChaser_5 wrote:
         | New jobs or new environments in general can be hard. I'm
         | starting a new job soon and not looking forward to that aspect
         | of things. I guess making an effort to talk with people about
         | their projects even if you are not directly working in them
         | might help. I'm going to be in a similar situation - new
         | office, working on something different from everyone else there
         | - so any advice anyone has would be welcome.
        
         | JohnFen wrote:
         | I've felt that way with nearly every new job I've started.
         | Worse, it's combined with the desire to impress people.
         | 
         | Personally, I've found that the fastest way to get past that is
         | to get a task where you need to work closely with someone. The
         | work itself becomes an ice-breaker of sorts.
         | 
         | Depending on your situation, maybe you could ask your manager
         | for such a task. But even if that's not in the cards, sooner or
         | later you'll be actively working with someone on something.
        
       | JohnFen wrote:
       | A perverse aspect of human nature is that it's easier to feel
       | really lonely when you're surrounded by people than when you're
       | actually alone.
       | 
       | Loneliness comes from a lack of meaningful interaction with
       | people. When you're surrounded by people you don't have
       | meaningful interactions with, it makes that loneliness more
       | present and obvious.
        
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