[HN Gopher] My Brain Doesn't Picture Things
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       My Brain Doesn't Picture Things
        
       Author : bookofjoe
       Score  : 24 points
       Date   : 2023-10-06 12:41 UTC (10 hours ago)
        
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       | weinzierl wrote:
       | _" I have what is called "aphantasia," the absence of voluntary
       | imagination of the senses. I know what a top hat is. I can
       | describe its main characteristics. I can even draw an above-
       | average impression of one on a piece of paper for you. But I
       | can't visualize it mentally. What's wrong with me?"_
       | 
       | How can you draw a thing without visualizing it? Do the
       | coordinates of the vertices appear in your head or instructions
       | about how to move your hand? Or is it like you wake up and
       | suddenly you have a finished painting in front of you with no
       | idea how it got there?
        
         | aphantasiathr wrote:
         | [dead]
        
         | throw1234651234 wrote:
         | This is an absolutely correct question to ask. It's also a good
         | question to ask people who claim they can visualize things
         | well, but can't draw.
         | 
         | I think people vastly, vastly overstate how well they can
         | actually visualize something in their mind. Most people can't
         | visualize a circle of a solid color and change the color in
         | their mind, let alone visualize a face or anything significant.
        
           | htss2013 wrote:
           | Humans seem optimized for detailed recognition of visuals,
           | not reproduction of them. Makes evolutionary sense because
           | you can easily see the utility of detailed recognition, but
           | what justifies the additional burden of detailed
           | reproduction?
           | 
           | People who can draw detailed reproductions are either
           | oddballs with photographic memory, or they've perfected the
           | skill of adjusting their drawings as they develop gradient
           | descent style using detailed recognition as the judge of
           | where to stop.
        
         | drbawb wrote:
         | >How can you draw a thing without visualizing it?
         | 
         | Speaking personally: my hand just moves. A top hat is roughly
         | an elliptical base with a smaller cylinder affixed to it on-
         | center, maybe a colored band or a bow wrapped around the
         | bottom. The band is another cylinder w/ less height
         | circumscribed into the larger one. The bow is maybe two
         | triangles connected w/ a circle. Add some squigglies and
         | shading to make the bow look like fabric. All this has to be
         | skewed by perspective, which is going to be some lines I lay
         | down w/ a straight edge. I like pencil, because I make lots of
         | mistakes. I hated art-class as a kid because markers, crayons,
         | colored pencils, etc. were torture to me, I had no idea how
         | someone could commit to permanence w/ the first stroke.
         | (Obviously had no idea what aphantasia was, then, but I do
         | remember thinking pretty early on how _weird_ guided meditation
         | sessions were. The backs of my eyelids are pretty
         | uninteresting.)
         | 
         | >Do the coordinates of the vertices appear in your head or
         | instructions about how to move your hand?
         | 
         | I don't see anything except what is on the paper. I probably
         | use more guidelines than most, and my (admittedly amateurish)
         | art looks very "sketch-y" _because it is._ I use lots of thin
         | strokes or draw guidelines and erase ones that don't seem
         | right. I'm very bad at "rendering" final scenes, I essentially
         | have to just trace my own work very deliberately. (Though I'm
         | slowly learning to lean on tracing via layers in digital tools
         | to help with that.)
         | 
         | The facts of the "scene" are just present in my mind. My muscle
         | memory acts on them. I am usually repulsed by what's on the
         | paper and refine it. It's maybe akin to an internal monologue;
         | closest thing I can think of is if someone was reading me a
         | recipe over the phone: but instead of ingredients it was simple
         | shapes "draw this, then that on top of it, but erase this line
         | here at the bottom." Though it's not really a voice, exactly,
         | unless I choose to vocalize or sub-vocalize it.
         | 
         | I don't really know how to describe it, I don't "see" the
         | facts, or "hear" the facts, they're just _there._ If you ask me
         | about my car, it's a blue Subaru. I didn't envision their
         | emblem, or see the color blue, or the outline of the car, or
         | anything like that. I just know it's a Subaru, and it's regal
         | blue pearl - 35J. (Ironically I'm fucking terrible at trivia
         | games.)
         | 
         | Also - if you ask me to draw with my eyes closed - you're
         | probably going to get a bunch of disjoint strokes. It took a
         | _long_ time for me to figure out how to effectively use a
         | digital tablet. (I 'm still not sure I love it, but digital
         | authoring fills too many other gaps for me to give up on it.)
        
           | masswerk wrote:
           | I have the condition, as well (that is, I may have a short
           | visual flash or broad impression, but I can't sustain this),
           | still, part of my work is working as a designer and I'm
           | considered proficient at drawing. It really comes down to
           | classic poetics and relying on / trusting your gestures,
           | while you are drawing. The amazing thing is that you can
           | produce a stroke, you couldn't have thought of in a
           | controlled way, and you're kind of surprising yourself. (I
           | believed for a long time, it would be like this for
           | everybody.)
           | 
           | BTW, this may be related or not, but I have learned to detest
           | gesture based UIs in apps, and, since this has become the
           | prevalent form of control, I've removed about all apps from
           | my phone.
        
         | perrygeo wrote:
         | > How can you draw a thing without visualizing it?
         | 
         | This is a great question. I have an inability to draw things
         | from memory (despite being able to recognize them immediately
         | and form strong narrative memories of them). This realization
         | is what lead to me to think I have aphantasia.
         | 
         | A few years ago, I decided to draw a face everyday from memory
         | (of someone I knew well visually) to see if I could train
         | myself to get better. After 6 months of daily practice, my
         | faces still looked like cartoons. My technique got better from
         | rote memorization, but importantly I never got to the point
         | where I could recognize my subject from my own drawing. They
         | all just looked like random people poorly drawn. I can
         | recognize the mistakes as soon as they're on paper but during
         | the initial creation I feel like I'm guessing where the lines
         | go based on some verbal/narrative structure ("I know she has
         | long hair, how about this..."), then saying "hmm that's not
         | right". I have no reference image in my mind to work off of.
         | 
         | But I can immediately pattern match against my drawing to see
         | how far off I am, which means the visual information is encoded
         | in my brain somewhere. Still no clue on how to voluntarily
         | access that memory - it's as if my visual systems only fire
         | when photons hit my eyeballs. Which only helps after I've made
         | my shitty drawing, not while I'm drawing.
        
       | vinhcognito wrote:
       | Anyone with Aphantasia or are curious about it might like this
       | fairly recent article that eventually gets into a theory of the
       | mechanics of different cases of Aphantasia and what might be
       | happening behind the scenes.
       | 
       | Aphantasia: In search of a theory
       | https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/mila.12432
       | 
       | I find it incredibly surreal to read current research on how my
       | own mind might be working and finding parts of it quite relatable
       | and insightful.
        
       | bookofjoe wrote:
       | https://archive.ph/ZRIeD
        
       | rogerclark wrote:
       | "In my head, the way it happens is..." Okay, sure, man. Whatever
       | you say.
       | 
       | Decades of research have proven that people cannot be trusted to
       | describe how their own minds work. We are unreliable narrators of
       | our own experience even in the best conditions, and having a
       | zeitgeisty, quirky trait like aphantasia to wear as a badge will
       | obviously skew the results even further.
       | 
       | Personally, I don't believe for a second that there are a
       | significant number of sighted, otherwise typical human beings out
       | there who have zero ability to visualize anything. Of course,
       | people get better at things with practice, so I buy that some
       | people might be better at it than others. I couldn't recall
       | melodies very well before studying music for several years. But
       | if you know what an apple looks like, and you can describe that
       | or draw it, even crudely, then you have some inner representation
       | of what an apple looks like. Whatever words you use to convey
       | your internal experience of recalling or assembling the relevant
       | information are inconsequential.
        
         | RoyalHenOil wrote:
         | I tend to agree. I think we just vary somewhat in how aware we
         | are of our internal processes, with most of those processes
         | being unconscious.
         | 
         | For example, I am very adept at art, particularly color and
         | shading, yet I struggle to consciously imagine color or
         | shading. I can consciously imagine 3-dimensional shapes and
         | rotate them, but I struggle with any other visual data.
         | 
         | And yet I demonstrably CAN generate other visual data because I
         | can draw and paint things, even things I have never seen
         | before.
         | 
         | Clearly my brain is actually doing that work, even if I am just
         | not conscious of it, thus I don't ascribe aphantasia to myself.
         | My brain is perfectly functional in this area.
        
       | [deleted]
        
       | d-lisp wrote:
       | When I decide to see things in my mind, if I don't focus enough
       | to keep them still they never cease to become something else than
       | they represent. If I imagine a luxurious green field with an
       | apple tree, immediately if I don't control the scene mentally to
       | conserve it, some apple will fall producing a noise, some mad cow
       | will run into the fov, trying to hit the apple with its horn,
       | yelling and distracting me or whatever event that seems to happen
       | naturally in the weird world that is _my mind_.
       | 
       | Example : I imagine a table > the legs of the table become rubber
       | and bend, the table seems to be a live and jumps like if it was
       | alive, some marbles fall onto it like raindrops on a bad day of
       | autumn, the table falls because of the marbles on the ground ...
       | 
       | Very funny, but also quite frustrating because it really is HARD
       | to stop stuff to happen.
        
         | jddj wrote:
         | This happens to me only if I'm particularly underslept.
        
         | ManuelKiessling wrote:
         | I'm currently not sure if I have aphantasia or not.
         | 
         | I don't remember the number of windows in my house, and I'm
         | currently not in or near my house, but no problem -- I simply
         | wander through my house in my mind, and count the windows: 9.
         | 
         | So I cannot have aphantasia, right? How can I "visually" count
         | the windows in my house without the capability to "see" in my
         | mind?
         | 
         | But all those tests? I never really "see" that darn apple, at
         | least not in the way that "awake-plus-photons" seeing works for
         | me. Not even close. It's more like seeing conceptually, or in
         | the abstract.
         | 
         | Plus, I can relate to your comment. Maybe I have a focus
         | problem, not an aphantasia problem?
         | 
         | But I can plan, design, and implement really complex software
         | systems, so I cannot have a focus problem, right?
        
           | ozmodiar wrote:
           | I would describe my mental vision as working the same way as
           | you, and have always tested highly in my ability to mentally
           | manipulate 3D objects. I don't think this is aphantasia so
           | much as a language issue when describing mental processes. I
           | am a little surprised that some comments here reference
           | people who claim to be able to generate mental images as if
           | they see them, that's certainly a different level of
           | visualization.
           | 
           | Funny enough my son can't dream. It took him awhile to figure
           | out something was different, and he was jealous that other
           | people got to experience something 'like VR' when they sleep.
           | I tried testing him for aphantasia by asking him to describe
           | mental pictures and he seemed not to have it. Personally I
           | have very vivid dreams. The brain is an interesting thing,
           | and it's funny how hard it is to communicate the internal
           | workings.
        
           | PortiaBerries wrote:
           | Wow, you don't have very many windows.
        
       | japostoles wrote:
       | I'm struggling to figure out if my mind's eye "sees" anything, or
       | if I'm just imagining the concept of the item I'm thinking about.
       | If I'm comparing this vision to having a dream, say, it's
       | certainly not visual.
       | 
       | "...there is a simple and helpful test that can give you a clue
       | into whether you may have it: Close your eyes and try to imagine
       | an apple, seeing it mentally in your mind's eye. If you can see
       | anything (anything at all--even a blurry outline), you do not
       | have aphantasia. If you see a void of complete darkness, you
       | might have aphantasia."
       | (https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/aphantasia-test)
       | 
       | When I imagine an apple, I don't see anything that could be
       | considered visual.. I can "see" it, but it's certainly not visual
       | as this suggests.
       | 
       | Anyone here seeing an actual rendering with their eyes closed?
        
         | LiquidPhD wrote:
         | I've talked extensively to friends about this because I see
         | nothing. I can picture nothing. It's just a void.
         | Interestingly, it hasn't always been this way for me. I
         | remember when I was in elementary and middle school, I could
         | take exams and see the page the answer was on in the textbook
         | in my mind. I'm not sure when or how I lost it, but it's gone.
         | I do sometimes dream in video, though.
         | 
         | For me, most of what happens in my mind is sound. I always
         | "hear" music in my head, though my inner monologue doesn't have
         | a voice. It's more like I just "know" what I'm thinking. I
         | don't hear anything in my head when I read, which allows me to
         | read pretty quickly. I'm not saying that I don't subvocalize or
         | whatever, but if I do it it isn't producing any sounds in my
         | brain.
         | 
         | Some people can apparently picture the scenes they read in
         | books. See the beach, see the characters, etc. I have talked
         | extensively with friends about this stuff and some of them say
         | it's ultra vivid, like watching a movie in their mind. I find
         | that wild. There is an anecdote about Richard Feynman and
         | another scientist or mathematician and how they kept time
         | differently. If I remember, one saw the clock in their mind and
         | the other relied on counting aloud mentally. I'm not sure where
         | I read it, sorry.
        
           | silisili wrote:
           | I'm pretty much the same.
           | 
           | However, one thing that throws me off is that when I see my
           | parents or other people I don't see often, they look markedly
           | different than I remember (aging). But I can't picture them
           | in my head. So why is said disconnect occurring?
        
           | theragra wrote:
           | I also was able to see stuff in middle school, like in a
           | movie. Now I can't see anything, like you. And I also have a
           | lot of music in my head
        
         | bafe wrote:
         | No, I somehow get the impression that outside of dreams my
         | internal life consists mostly of words
        
         | afpx wrote:
         | I see a rendering of a vague apple in front of me, slightly up
         | and to the right of my center vision toward my peripheral. The
         | alpha is almost 0, but if I focus on it, the alpha turns up to
         | maybe 0.02 and I can see low-resolution details. I can change
         | it's color, scale it, rotate it, slice it in half with an
         | imaginary knife, etc.
        
         | jddj wrote:
         | I _think_ I 'm with you, but I'm not sure if you're putting too
         | much emphasis on visual.
         | 
         | It certainly doesn't seem to come from the same place as
         | regular vision does, but they do say "mind's eye". I can
         | imagine an apple, and even slice it up, spin it around, pour
         | water on it. It has a colour, and can have any colour.
         | 
         | I always wondered how memories seemed (TFA touches on this but
         | not in detail) to people who claimed to be minds-eye-blind. Can
         | you not put yourself back on that beach when you were in your
         | mid twenties? Can you not remember his/her eyes/hair/smile/etc
         | at all? Isn't it kind of an image?
         | 
         | As an aside, the apple thing is actually slightly easier if I
         | dedicate only part of my attention to it, like casually
         | rotating it while writing this text, than if I close my eyes
         | and focus. But I've been working all day so clear focus in
         | general is hard to attain right now.
        
           | japostoles wrote:
           | When I think of a black and white apple in the context you
           | described, vs. a red or green one, there's a difference. The
           | way you've explained it makes me feel like we're similar, and
           | I'm definitely putting too much emphasis on visual.
           | 
           | My sister, though, said when she thinks of something in her
           | mind it's "blurry like [she doesn't] have glasses on", which
           | sounds highly visual.
           | 
           | I'm wondering if it's more about semantics and a
           | tomato/tomato like thing -- technically anything we visualize
           | is calling up a memory, or at made up of various components
           | from memory.
        
         | htss2013 wrote:
         | I think I see detailed renderings, eg, of a person's face. But
         | if I try to focus on the face and really examine its details I
         | can't. It's like that experience of trying to read a book in a
         | dream but when you go to read the lines, they're blurry.
         | 
         | I suspect when we see what appear to be detailed renderings in
         | our imagination, we are really seeing a compressed "essence" of
         | the thing and our brains trick us into thinking we could focus
         | on the details if we wanted to, when we really can't. It's
         | basically a conservation of energy thing.
        
         | godshatter wrote:
         | When I try to see an apple, I see absolutely nothing. I can
         | pretend that there is an apple in front of me and that it's
         | spinning or whatever, but all I've really done is remember what
         | attributes I've given it and roughly what size it is.
         | 
         | There are some odd things I've paid attention to since I became
         | aware I had aphantasia and that it was a thing. I know for a
         | fact that my dreams are visual because I've had lucid dreams
         | before and was aware of them being visual and at a higher
         | fidelity than my eyes can normally see. I do see images when
         | I'm almost asleep or not quite awake yet. I've seen some images
         | after meditating for a long while, but I suspect I was just
         | starting to fall asleep. Other than that, eerily enough, the
         | only thing I've been able to see that doesn't involve photons
         | hitting my retinas when completely awake is the ghost of a
         | young woman that shyly watches me from the hallway when I'm
         | sometimes watching TV that I've seen on a few occasions. Make
         | of that what you will because I have no idea what to make of
         | it.
        
           | japostoles wrote:
           | Minus the last couple sentences, I would describe things the
           | same way you did in terms of visualizing, and have
           | experienced all those things.
           | 
           | Along the same lines as the young woman you're experiencing,
           | I used to get out of body experiences/sleep paralysis/waking
           | dreams (pick a label) nightly when I was in my 20s, and I
           | would see shadows and outlines of what would seem like
           | energies. That was mostly non-visual and interpretive, which
           | feels more like my minds-eye than a dream.
           | 
           | Not to go off topic, but ever try communicating with the shy
           | woman?
        
             | bafe wrote:
             | I stil (occasionally) get sleep paralysis in the form of a
             | person descending a rope from the ceiling or trying to
             | enter from the window. Over time I learned to recognise it
             | for what it is and control my reaction, saving a few
             | bedside lamps in the process
        
             | godshatter wrote:
             | No, I never tried and she hasn't come around for a few
             | months that I've noticed. I don't know if she's a ghost or
             | whatever, but if it is something that's self-aware I didn't
             | want to give it the impression that I was inviting it into
             | my home.
             | 
             | The first time I saw her I did go search around the house
             | in case I had a "homeless person living in a cupboard"
             | scenario.
             | 
             | I've never experienced sleep paralysis, thankfully, even
             | when working on being able to dream lucidly.
             | 
             | On the topic of aphantasia, I would expect sleep paralysis
             | and any visual hallucinations to be on the dreaming/near to
             | dreaming side of the fence since that circuitry seems to
             | work for people with aphantasia as far as I can determine.
             | If I try to think of specific memories involving people I
             | am very close to I can get a flash of something that goes
             | away before I'm even really aware of it that seems to be in
             | the side channel people talk of. It doesn't seem to work
             | for anything not emotionally connected, and only rarely.
             | 
             | The lady that has visited me was felt completely different.
             | Thinking back, I have also been able to see auras, and just
             | proved to myself that I still have that ability. It might
             | be a visual abnormality or something, though. If I was
             | actually visualizing, it was an overlay and not on a side
             | channel.
        
         | bassrattle wrote:
         | Yes, I see it in the mind but not with my eyes. In a way, all
         | vision is in the mind, but the origin of the image is like a
         | different channel of information. I'm aware of the blackness
         | behind my closed eyelids, but it's easy to let that go, switch
         | focus to a different channel of information. There is a perfect
         | image of an apple in a white space.
        
           | japostoles wrote:
           | This is a very interesting way of describing it, and worded
           | this way I think I'm the same way.
           | 
           | It does feel like paying attention to a different input
           | stream -- just like that -- although it's still not a visual
           | that replaces the darkness, but I'm getting, what I would
           | say, the effects of seeing the apple.
        
         | sdiupIGPWEfh wrote:
         | > Anyone here seeing an actual rendering with their eyes
         | closed?
         | 
         | At times. Outside dreams, it's most vivid during hypnagogic
         | states, where anything I try to picture manifests with full
         | clarity.
         | 
         | During regular waking hours, it's much less intense, usually
         | somewhere right in the middle of the various aphantasia tests
         | I've come across. Colors are sometimes there. But I can rotate
         | and examine 3d objects in my mind quite well, and when I'm
         | painting, it's always better when I can paint a subject in my
         | head first. I can also see words and visualize numbers.
        
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