[HN Gopher] My mindfulness practice led me to meltdown (2021)
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       My mindfulness practice led me to meltdown (2021)
        
       Author : fxtentacle
       Score  : 259 points
       Date   : 2023-02-21 09:29 UTC (13 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (danlawton.substack.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (danlawton.substack.com)
        
       | me551ah wrote:
       | What he experienced is actually expected, deeper states of
       | meditation bring out even harder experiences. Meditation is
       | marketed in the west as some sort of a relaxation pill, designed
       | to cure anxiety and other mental ailments. It's actually not.
       | Meditation is a hardcore exercise for the mind and if your mind
       | is not strong enough then deeper states will break you.
        
         | lr4444lr wrote:
         | Sounds as conveniently unfalsifibale as any more patent
         | pseudoscience.
        
           | qikInNdOutReply wrote:
           | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saccade
           | 
           | Your own eyes jump around all day, but you never notice. You
           | do not notice, because your visual sense, fills the gaps, and
           | even refills these gaps, with storys that make sense. "You
           | frozze with fear" when the bike approached, instead of "My
           | eyes filled the buffer to slow for my car".
           | 
           | Meditation is trying to break these cobbled together parts of
           | the self-computer appart, trying to understand. Its a not
           | very wise and not very calming endavour. After all the
           | machine that should reassemble it, is the one that took it
           | apart.
        
             | feoren wrote:
             | A good response to "that's not falsifiable" is offering a
             | test that could prove the assertion false. This is only
             | more unfalsifiable metaphor.
             | 
             | Also: saccades are very easy to notice if you just pay a
             | little attention to them, just like noticing your tongue in
             | your mouth or your nose in your vision. They're not a deep
             | psychological enigma.
        
           | astrange wrote:
           | > Meditation is a hardcore exercise for the mind and if your
           | mind is not strong enough then deeper states will break you.
           | 
           | This is certainly falsifiable. Just see if people doing more
           | intensive meditation have more mental health issues.
        
           | Karunamon wrote:
           | Anything as subjective as one's own mindset interpreted by
           | oneself is incompatible with the scientific method in the
           | first place. It's not the right tool for the job because it
           | is impossible to objectively measure the results.
           | 
           | That does not make those results any less real.
        
             | jtbayly wrote:
             | Doesn't that make it basically impossible for research to
             | be done on many medicines, including pain medications?
        
               | beepbooptheory wrote:
               | Maybe not impossible, but if it was easy or if the gp
               | didn't have a point, wouldn't we have figured out what
               | fibromyalgia is by now? Also maybe we would have given
               | more scrutiny to the widespread marketing and
               | distribution of oxycotin in the U.S., at least enough to
               | prevent the disaster it caused?
        
             | fluoridation wrote:
             | "Real" in what way? I would say that something is
             | definitely real if I can agree with other people that it's
             | there, while other things can at best be put in the "maybe"
             | pile.
             | 
             | Whatever you experience while meditating, other people
             | won't be able to experience it, so it can't go in the
             | "definitely real" pile. So the fact that it can't be
             | studied scientifically definitely does make it less real,
             | in the sense that your can't say that it's real with the
             | same confidence, even when you're the one experiencing it.
        
               | Karunamon wrote:
               | As real as the rest of your feelings in that they color,
               | if not drive, your subjective experience of the world.
               | Which applies to pretty much every person on the planet.
        
               | Frummy wrote:
               | So not having the tool to measure something makes it not
               | part of reality? Makes me think of how our worldview
               | every now and then expands, from geocentrism to
               | heliocentrism and so on. Surely the earth revolved around
               | the sun before it was understood to be that way. And
               | surely our experiences are real even though our minds are
               | isolated from eachother. In Thomas Mann's Doctor Faustus,
               | the devil told Adrian roughly this: Your brain is sick,
               | yes you are hallucinating me, but that doesn't make me
               | less real.
        
               | fluoridation wrote:
               | You're confusing the words "true" and "real". It is true
               | that the Earth revolves around the Sun, and the orbit is
               | also real. That 2+2=4 is true, but it's not real. The
               | electrochemical activity in your brain is real, and the
               | fact that it causes your subjective experience is true.
               | Your subjective experience is true to you (you're
               | experiencing the things you're experiencing), but it's
               | unknown to me. It is also of unknown realness, i.e. of
               | unknown correlation with reality. You can see things that
               | are not real and not see things that are real, or feel
               | things for no reason (e.g. intense fear not because
               | there's something frightening, but because there's a drug
               | in your body).
        
               | Frummy wrote:
               | Thank you for your reply. In most ways I agree, in all
               | ways actually. But my point is that the term "real"
               | doesn't mean strictly material. The picture I'm painting
               | is to bring away "reality" from strictly material and
               | external. I do this to argue with the point above your
               | original reply, saying that the scientific method is
               | incompatible with these things. We're in philosophical
               | territory and I won't pretend to be an expert but I think
               | we will have plenty of tools to bring the scientific
               | method even to our most personal experiences.
        
               | fluoridation wrote:
               | Which is why I originally asked what was meant by "real".
               | From a consensus-realistic perspective, things that are
               | purely subjective and non-material things are definitely
               | less real or at least less-obviously real. From a
               | solipsistic perspective the _only_ real thing is one 's
               | subjective experience, and everything else is in doubt.
               | But most people are not capable of consistently
               | maintaining a solipsistic perspective, so I didn't assume
               | that's what was meant.
        
               | Frummy wrote:
               | Thank you for the conversation. Your style reminds me of
               | "Theaetus" by Plato. Maybe you'd like it.
        
               | pbhjpbhj wrote:
               | Even the solipsistic must surely realise that there are
               | simulacrum of external reality that can be dismissed as,
               | say, 'it was just a shiver' rather than being a 'real'
               | part of one's subjective experience.
               | 
               | Reflecting, I guess I'm questioning if the solipsist
               | really believes all that which is put before their minds
               | is really "experience", per se.
               | 
               | As sure as anything, Pyrrhonism is where it's at!
        
               | fluoridation wrote:
               | Necessarily, that which is experienced is experienced.
               | The belief that one merely thinks is experiencing
               | something but is actually mistaken is untenable. The
               | question is whether the feeling of these keys under what
               | I think are my fingers is caused by something that exists
               | more or less as I perceive it, rather than some contrived
               | hallucination or an illusion. But I'm not able to doubt
               | that I am in fact feeling what I feel. Besides
               | mathematical truths, it's all I can be certain of.
        
               | enugu wrote:
               | As someone noticed, you are trying to say something
               | similar the private language argument of Wittgenstein.
               | 
               | But notice that this isn't really private to a person.
               | 
               | How are we sure about external events like a ball falling
               | down? Are they not processed by our minds and then
               | expressed in language. A ball falling down is fairly
               | standardized and accessible, but for other events there
               | is a lot more background which is needed. But human
               | experience and culture is filled with phenomena which
               | require a much larger shared context - which is acquired
               | after walking in a shared territory. Like long time
               | explorers of the seas who can have a a conversation on
               | far away lands.
               | 
               | Explaining many current physical concepts or how to
               | interpret the experiments which are conducted at a non-
               | superficial level requires years of training (leave alone
               | research). Even someone who finishes high school algebra
               | is at a rarefied stage compared to people thousands of
               | years ago.
               | 
               | Getting a shared context in meditation related
               | explorations might actually require much lesser time.
               | 
               | For similar reasons, negative stages itself have been
               | meticulously documented in manuals like Visuddhimaga
               | which are referenced in the books mentioned in the
               | article.(fwiw, my 2 cents on the article - maybe instead
               | of promoting intense concentration on sensory phenomena,
               | love based practices like bhakti or metta might be a
               | better popular practice).
               | 
               | A good counter argument is that in the physics example
               | there are gradual stages in learning where at each stage
               | you can test what you learn and match it with the world,
               | not spend 15 years of education to get to QFT and then
               | match with experience.
               | 
               | But that ladder is present even in the case of traditions
               | which explore the mind.
        
               | fluoridation wrote:
               | However, I question whether there's actually a shared
               | context when it comes to meditation. Unlike for external
               | phenomena like gravity and QM, there's a lot of ambiguity
               | related to communicating internal processes. For example,
               | basic emotions like happiness and fear are easily
               | communicated because they show up on the face. Two people
               | can agree that the emotion that causes them to make the
               | same face is the same one, and so can agree to call the
               | emotion by a word. But are we sure the same is true for
               | things that don't work like this? If someone says "do
               | this and you'll feel like that" and I do and I don't feel
               | that, what am I to understand? Is it that I did it wrong,
               | that I did it right and my brain just works differently,
               | or that the speaker and I are failing to understand each
               | other? Did the speaker misuse a word? Did I mistakenly
               | think a word meant something other than what was
               | intended? Particularly when it comes to subjective
               | feelings there's going to be a lot of metaphors involved,
               | which never help for unambiguous communication.
        
               | beepbooptheory wrote:
               | Accidental Wittgenstein :)
        
           | naasking wrote:
           | Meditation is empirically associated with some degree of
           | danger in some subset of the population:
           | 
           | https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-science-
           | behind-b...
           | 
           | Doesn't sound unfalsifiable to me.
        
           | cahooon wrote:
           | Anything that happens only inside peoples' minds is in a
           | pretty tough realm to study. It's okay to be afraid of it or
           | to assume it doesn't mean anything, but it would be really
           | stretching "skepticism" to say that people don't have
           | visions/hallucinations of all kinds in response to meditative
           | practice. You'd just be using "falsifiability" to avoid
           | feeling uncomfortable.
        
             | Silverback_VII wrote:
             | Well danger if done wrong is a good selling point. it
             | suggests that the method must be powerful. I'm sure some
             | gurus exploit this (manipulative technique) to be perceived
             | as more serious or experienced. The problem is now,
             | speaking about the (real or not) dangers of meditation
             | could also induce some kind of nocebo effect in
             | practitioners. And since most people open for this stuff
             | will be more on the irrational spectrum of humanity ... the
             | danger of meditation may be a self-fulfilling prophecy.
             | 
             | We speak about mindfulness here but there is the same
             | discussion and warnings about kundalini for example.
             | 
             | Obviously focusing (or not) on something and sitting for a
             | long time will alter you state of consciousness to some
             | degree like a trance. But are there real and objective
             | dangers besides the rewiring of your brain?
        
           | tarotuser wrote:
           | It's easy to dismiss a whole class of phenomenon just because
           | there isn't an ample understanding of it. And much of mind is
           | unfalsifiable becuase we don't yet understand how to make
           | heads or tails of the largest neural network in our
           | existence: our brains.
           | 
           | And before you look at my username, instead look no further
           | than "Placebos". Why does a sugar pill named "morphine" work?
           | Obviously, handing them a teaspoon of sugar does nothing, but
           | when relabeled, works.
           | 
           | And most of the occult as well is of mind - either my own
           | mind, or that of others. Science even has a semi-explanation
           | with the holographic universe theory, which says that every
           | particle is encoded with the information of everything, just
           | at the simplest resolution. And if mind could be tuned so,
           | could access everything within their own mind. (The old
           | occult principle is 'As above, so below.')
           | 
           | But it's easy to paint things you either don't like or don't
           | understand as "pseudoscience". Flat earth used to be science.
           | Earth-centric orbits used to be science. Wearing masks full
           | of herbs when dealing with plague victims used to be science.
        
           | yamrzou wrote:
           | So what? All our inner experiences are unfalsifiable.
        
             | SV_BubbleTime wrote:
             | Why do you think of affirmative to that is unacceptable? Is
             | it scary?
        
           | vanderZwan wrote:
           | Uh, how exactly? What's unfalsifiable about self-reflection
           | leading to painful confrontations, or those confrontations
           | being provocative in ways that can manifest differently
           | depending on the person? To name just one superficial aspect
           | of mindfulness.
           | 
           | Are you claiming that sports exercises are unfalsifiable?
           | Because the principle is the same, except that we're talking
           | about the mind instead of physical fitness.
        
             | bpodgursky wrote:
             | Just to be blunt about it, people lie about the state of
             | their mind all the time. People make stuff up for
             | attention, to fit in, or just for fun.
        
               | naasking wrote:
               | Sure, and people lie on surveys used in studies too. Only
               | some percentage lie like this though.
        
               | weregiraffe wrote:
               | Yes, and you can never know which percentage, so surveys
               | in general only teach you about how people answer
               | surveys.
        
               | naasking wrote:
               | Of course we can. fMRI will be able to distinguish
               | legitimate from illegitimate brain states.
        
               | op00to wrote:
               | Used to work in a neuroscience labs. fMRI can not be used
               | as a lie detector.
        
               | naasking wrote:
               | Not as a lie detector, but to detect whether the
               | underlying mental state is actually present. It seems
               | almost certain that if someone is experiencing or has
               | experienced a state of supreme bliss and is recalling it,
               | that has to pretty visible on fMRI, as compare to someone
               | who has never experienced supreme bliss and is just
               | saying they have.
        
               | vanderZwan wrote:
               | So? That might make it hard for you and me to figure
               | these things out in daily life, but psychology as field
               | of science has been trying to study the mind rigorously
               | for at least a century by now, and it's not exactly naive
               | about this problem.
        
         | melx wrote:
         | Meditation is looking into one's mind to uncover the dirty
         | things that one will have to face and "improve" upon. I
         | meditate since 2011.
        
           | lanstin wrote:
           | Are you judging the various thoughts and emotions as dirty or
           | clean? That is a very different practice from what I have
           | been taught about Zen.
        
         | HeckFeck wrote:
         | Curious. It sounds like meditation has been misappropriated in
         | the same way as therapy.
         | 
         | Therapy _should_ bring up difficult emotions and experiences
         | from the past because they are often the root of dysfunction
         | and frustration in the present.
        
           | samastur wrote:
           | And then what?
           | 
           | I'm genuinely curious as a loved one rejects therapy exactly
           | because she already knows what causes of her depression are
           | and does not see any use in debating them further as they
           | only bring her down.
           | 
           | I don't have experience or knowledge to explain how it would
           | help her.
        
             | thih9 wrote:
             | Please remember that having a loved one that deals with
             | depression is itself a big challenge and good reason for
             | therapy too. The fact that she might need it "more" is not
             | a reason to avoid seeking help yourself (if you feel that
             | you need it).
        
             | brabarossa wrote:
             | And then you can see unhelpful thoughts and behaviors, and
             | work on yourself.
             | 
             | Here's an example of techniques for CBT:
             | https://positivepsychology.com/cbt-cognitive-behavioral-
             | ther...
        
             | LastTrain wrote:
             | Maybe she knows herself, hopefully she isn't getting
             | pressured to do something she doesn't want to do. Ask her
             | what, instead of talk therapy, she thinks would be helpful.
             | The answer might be enlightening.
        
             | richiebful1 wrote:
             | A good therapist doesn't just talk about root causes, imo.
             | A good therapist talks about healthy coping mechanisms, and
             | ways to get out of negative thought cycles
        
               | astrange wrote:
               | That has the problem that it's boring. Where do people
               | who are overly well adjusted go to get traumatized again?
               | (Like a secular Tantrayana.)
        
             | hutzlibu wrote:
             | "because she already knows what causes of her depression
             | are and does not see any use in debating them further as
             | they only bring her down."
             | 
             | Hard to advice without further knowing details, but I could
             | relate in a way, that the global state of the world causes
             | me depression, but I cannot change the root cause. But I
             | can change my attitude towards things. Deal with the
             | problems I can solve and accept the rest. Spot patterns,
             | where I indulge myself into misery and choose a different
             | track (if possible).
             | 
             | And if we are talking about a childhood trauma, this person
             | wants to avoid, then you can compare it to a splinter that
             | is still in the flesh, causing misery and infection -
             | removing the splinter will hurt and it will bleed - but
             | after the splinter is gone, the wound can heal for good.
        
               | HeckFeck wrote:
               | From my experience the biggest source of depression was
               | people around me. Especially those I felt obligated to,
               | but they didn't seem obligated to me in return. Maybe
               | looking here might help. Indeed, it is not uncommon to
               | criticise the world as a substitute for those in our
               | environment whom we cannot criticise.
               | 
               | Leaving those people was difficult but the depression
               | lifted and I was free to focus on my own life, which has
               | been getting better.
               | 
               | Also getting a good night's sleep is very helpful. There
               | are certainly also intensifying factors in the modern
               | western lifestyle.
        
           | robocat wrote:
           | Opening past mental wounds is often like massive invasive
           | surgery, requiring immense skill, plenty of observation
           | afterwards, and a lengthy recovery.
           | 
           | Unfortunately many councillors and psychologists are barbers,
           | butchering people's minds, or infecting them with hokum.
           | 
           | The worst I have ever heard of was getting a bunch of
           | troubled teenagers together, a session getting them to share
           | their horrific experiences, then sending them home with zero
           | concern for the consequences. I mean, you are already
           | struggling and then you need to process other people's
           | stories of rape, family violence, and worse. Or you need to
           | face whatever Pandora's box demons you have shared. Ouch.
        
           | thih9 wrote:
           | There's additional layer of complexity: both "meditation" and
           | "therapy" exist in various different forms. The above
           | description might fit some methods better and some less.
           | 
           | E.g. some meditation techniques do focus on relaxation; some
           | therapy types focus less on emotions and experiences from the
           | past and look at the present instead; etc.
        
           | seltzered_ wrote:
           | There's been works like 'McMindfulness' written about this,
           | along with framings warning of practices of 'escapism
           | meditation'
        
           | zikzak wrote:
           | There is a reason that it is normally recommended that
           | serious/deep meditation practice be done with a teacher. It's
           | isn't so people can scam newbies out of money. When you
           | really practice meditation consistently over a long period of
           | time, you experience a lot of different states of mind. Some
           | of these can make you feel "god like" as if you were
           | enlightened. Teachers bring you down to Earth and remind you
           | that it's just your mind being present while not meditating
           | that makes you feel that way. You can experience strange
           | visions like flashing lights and things. Some people
           | interpret these as a mystical experience or something but
           | it's probably just some random crap your brain is doing in a
           | deep, meditative state. The most common effect, though, is a
           | stripping down of all the lies we tell ourselves. This can be
           | very, very traumatic. The realization that you are mostly
           | making things up as you go and that you might not even have
           | free will can be very heavy and hard to take. You might
           | question who you are and how you have lived until this point.
           | 
           | The real issue, though, is the "I'm enlightened" crowd. They
           | are insufferable and need to brought back down to reality
           | before they go to a dinner party and annoy everyone.
        
       | fallingfrog wrote:
       | Did this guy go to the hospital? That sounds like a stroke or an
       | aneurysm or something like that.
        
         | henearkr wrote:
         | Yes, that's what I immediately thought too. Like a small
         | stroke.
         | 
         | It can also be some cognitive effect from a latent condition
         | like MS.
         | 
         | Or any other neurological problem, really.
         | 
         | To put the blame on the meditation is a bit quick, in my
         | opinion.
         | 
         | At most, the meditation _maybe_ put some load on brain regions
         | that were not accustomed to work to this intensity, but it isn
         | 't even required to explain the symptoms: could just be bad
         | luck that the neurological problem occurred during meditation.
        
       | agileAlligator wrote:
       | I never understood exactly why the West views meditation as
       | something healing, something that can be prescribed willy-nilly
       | to individuals with a history of trauma. I guess it's because it
       | is non-invasive and doesn't sound like it would harm the patient
       | further if not help them.
        
       | DasCorCor wrote:
       | I think this author's perspective and story are really important.
       | It's pretty clear that he overdid it and that there is an issue
       | in some (possibly most) of the western Buddhist groups in
       | marketing mindfulness as a cure all panacea. Everything has a
       | concave dose-response curve, even water and radiation.
        
       | YeahNO wrote:
       | Intense meditation and self-introspection will dredge up long
       | suppressed trauma you may not even be aware of. It may be beyond
       | your ability to cope with its sudden release. Western
       | appropriation of Eastern tradition can be fraught with peril.
       | 
       | "Yet, somewhere six or seven years into my practice, whatever
       | progress I was making petered out. I was experiencing a growing
       | sense of bodily agitation and began self-medicating with drugs
       | and alcohol. Looking back, it was also during this time period
       | that I had my first dissociative experiences, in which elements
       | of my sense of self became separated in a way that impaired my
       | ability to function."
       | 
       | Also, recreational drugs may introduce negative experiences in
       | your meditation journey.
        
       | andrewstuart wrote:
       | Sounds like a psychotic episode.
        
       | justsocrateasin wrote:
       | Reminds me a lot of Overtraining Syndrome (OTS), the condition
       | where your body stops responding positively to the stress of
       | endurance sports and essentially stops recovering quickly. A 20
       | mile run no longer makes you faster, instead the fatigue from it
       | just settles inside your body.
       | 
       | I remember reading that while training for an ironman and getting
       | a bit spooked. But then I realized that the folks who suffer from
       | OTS are taking it to such an extreme. This article reminded me a
       | lot of that - it sounds like you can take anything too far. At
       | the 99.99th percentile, probably any healthy activity can become
       | an obsessive act that can ruin your life. But anywhere in between
       | the 50th and 99th percentile it's probably still a good thing.
        
         | californical wrote:
         | Yeah I had similar thoughts about OTS when training for one
         | myself -- but I think it's a lot easier to push into that
         | hypothetical 99.99 percentile than you think.
         | 
         | Like maybe 1/20 people will ever do something as intense as a
         | triathlon, in general. So we're already at 95%. Then maybe 10%
         | of triathletes will do a full Ironman. 99.5%. Of that top level
         | who train for an Ironman, half are not training that hard and
         | just having fun. 99.75%.
         | 
         | So if you're someone who is training hard for an Ironman,
         | you're already well beyond the 99th percentile. But still only
         | a small fraction of people who train for an Ironman have any
         | issues with it. But if you're at that level, you're already
         | close to the top and it's not a crazy stretch to think you
         | could get there if you got a bit carried away.
         | 
         | Similar with meditation, I think the analogy works. If you're
         | consistently meditating for 10min per day for several straight
         | months, that's more than most people would ever do.
        
       | codeptualize wrote:
       | It sounds like he tortured himself then got PTSD from it.
       | 
       | Most things are fine when done in moderation, most things are bad
       | when taken to the extremes.
       | 
       | "13 days to go" suggest this was some crazy regimen, if you would
       | do that to prisoners I bet it's actually considered torture.
       | 
       | If I read about his past, it sounds to me like he might have some
       | underlying mental health problems that would be good to address.
       | Not by guru's, retreats, or pseudoscience, but psychologists and
       | other professionals.
       | 
       | I think he does come to the right conclusion that the extremes
       | can be very harmful. They are not that far from cults, always
       | some guru or leader, then many people blindly following their
       | weird practices based on absolutely nothing but pseudo science
       | and believe, with a tendency to get more extreme (and more
       | expensive!) the deeper you get into them.
       | 
       | Meditation is fine if done in moderation and as long as you don't
       | expect it to solve all your problems. It can help with certain
       | things, it also won't solve serious mental problems.
       | 
       | Working through mental health problems is no fun and a lot of
       | work with many ups and downs, there is no easy solution, there
       | are no shortcuts. Get professional help, get therapy, get
       | medication if needed, be kind to yourself, and just keep working
       | at it one step at a time.
        
       | denton-scratch wrote:
       | > In fact, in Britton's study, 60% of the participants reporting
       | distressing experiences were meditation teachers, rebutting
       | Davidson's argument that experienced meditators don't end up in
       | difficult territory.
       | 
       | Meditation teacher !== experienced meditator. Author seems to
       | have been hanging out in a McMindfulness milieu, with lots of
       | people who are "professional" practitioners, and in an
       | environment where lots of people treat meditation as something
       | divorced from the Buddhist religion.
       | 
       | I was annoyed when my teacher insisted that Buddhism was not a
       | "science of mind", or some body of secular practices; it was
       | intrisically religious. I tried for a decade to live with that,
       | but eventually I gave it all up.
        
       | grufus wrote:
       | The theory of 16 stages is pretty entertaining.
       | 
       | > According to Ingram, one must continue to meditate through
       | these awful experiences until reaching a deeper state of
       | awakening. He makes it clear that the consequences of stopping
       | are severe.
       | 
       | Ron Hubbard himself couldn't have stated it any better. He'd be
       | proud.
        
       | leashless wrote:
       | _All_ of the real meditation traditions around the world -
       | including the ones inside of Christianity - spend decades
       | training highly skilled teachers to help people
       | 
       | 1) avoid problems like this, and
       | 
       | 2) clean up problems like this when they do happen.
       | 
       | And even so those traditions never, ever (in my experience)
       | describe themselves as anything other than perilous. "The way is
       | long and narrow." "Like a snake entering a bamboo tube." And so
       | on.
       | 
       | I put together a system for solo practitioners working with
       | absolutely minimal oversight in 2015. People doing it since then,
       | I talk to them roughly once (on average) to check they're doing
       | it right, then don't hear back from them for years until they're
       | getting into the weird "foothills of enlightenment" end stage
       | stuff -- if they make it that far. Most don't, they plateaux.
       | Which is fine, that's a good, safe place to be.
       | 
       | Instructions here. There's a bunch of other stuff in that same
       | directory structure. It's fine.
       | 
       | http://files.howtolivewiki.com/.meditation_2015/transcripts/...
        
         | colechristensen wrote:
         | All long term buddhist retreats will essentially sit you down
         | and try make sure you're mentally healthy enough and prepared
         | to partake. People losing it during long bouts is a _regular_
         | occurrence.
        
           | leashless wrote:
           | Absolutely agree. And sometimes it's probably an efficient
           | method: get people through the tough stuff fast, rip off the
           | band aid. But without the support teams in place the
           | proposition changes dramatically for the worse.
           | 
           | And our paradigm for safety is very different. People are
           | less expendable.
        
         | hiidrew wrote:
         | Thanks for sharing, going to check this out later off my work
         | computer. I've been trying to become more disciplined with my
         | meditation practice, I try to do 10 minutes every day.
        
           | leashless wrote:
           | This is probably not a good fit for you. Ten minutes a day
           | would generally be safe for anybody. This is a different
           | proposition.
        
         | jossclimb wrote:
         | Exactly!
         | 
         | The same thing plays out with psychedelics. Many cultures have
         | thousands of years of passed down knowledge with a community of
         | elders to guide people through a trip. In the west we think we
         | can replicate the same thing, sitting at home with a friend who
         | has no clue what they are doing when things go bad.
        
       | kouunji wrote:
       | This feels like part of a western habit of cherry-picking from
       | other traditions, and, in this case, not understanding the
       | context we're pulling from. We see things like Zen as fun,
       | playful and liberating, but miss the whole part of it that
       | entails "killing the self". It's a practice of systematically
       | disassembling what you thought you were until there is nothing
       | left...and this is a process that is generally done in a highly
       | structured, supervised way. It's telling that we just pluck out
       | the practice and think it will let us deal with our shit so we
       | can get more done at work. I say this from the context of having
       | studied in Zen temples in Japan in my 20s, and having done myself
       | real harm.
        
         | data_maan wrote:
         | I do not want to intrude - but I am curious at the same time
         | what you mean by "real harm", was it something along the lines
         | of what the original author described? (Or perhaps other people
         | can share their experiences?)
         | 
         | I'm also a bit confused from a logical point of view - if there
         | is such and end goal of Zen, of being "completely disassembled"
         | wouldn't Japanese temples where they do a lot of zazen, at some
         | point need to look like asylums for the terminally psychically
         | ill, once a majority has "disassembled themselves"?
        
       | theonemind wrote:
       | The dark-night-of-the-soul phenomenon is associated with
       | vipassana meditation.
       | 
       | In the Platform Sutra dating from perhaps around 700 AD, Huineng
       | (ostensible author) talks about people going insane from ill-
       | advised meditation methods of suppressing body and mind.
       | 
       | It seems like these early 'mystical' offshoots around meditation-
       | heavy religion typically don't typically involve or speak well of
       | a lot of meditation, truthfully. Zen Master Bankei didn't want
       | his monks to meditate at all.
       | 
       | The problem is that meditation is a cargo-cult. Early in the
       | history of Dzogchen, they had trekcho, "cutting straight
       | through", not a heavy emphasis on meditation. Early in the Zen
       | tradition, they had precious few words to say anything well of
       | meditation at all.
       | 
       | Zen Master Foyan wrote, maybe around 1200ish?:
       | 
       | > Buddhism is an easily understood, energy-saving teaching;
       | people strain themselves. Seeing them helpless, the ancients told
       | people to try meditating quietly for a moment. These are good
       | words, but later people did not understand the meaning of the
       | ancients; they went off and sat like lumps with knitted brows and
       | closed eyes, suppressing body and mind, waiting for
       | enlightenment. How stupid! How foolish!
       | 
       | As someone into this stuff, there is kind of something there--
       | it's the advaita vedanta like realization that _this is it_ , the
       | eye never sees itself. It's hard to describe in a few words, and
       | has nothing at all to do with vipassana or jhanas. Alternatively,
       | I think it has to do with switching to the floodlight perception
       | of the right hemisphere as the default resting state of the mind.
       | The left hemisphere tends to over-dominate because it works on
       | positive-feedback--the more it engages with something, the more
       | it wants to engage. It gets overheated and starts to turn its
       | tunnel vision into a primary aspect of ordinary awareness and
       | places a really heavy overlay on direct experience. The right
       | hemisphere does the more typical negative feedback/diminishing
       | marginal utility thing most of the time.
       | 
       | I'm a big fan of direct-path teachings like Loch Kelly gives. I
       | think heavy meditation, especially vipassana, is just a cargo-
       | cult hazing.
        
         | weregiraffe wrote:
         | >the eye never sees itself.
         | 
         | A mirror: allow me to introduce myself.
        
       | inphovore wrote:
       | Too much mindfulness reveals we are not alone in our own minds
       | and your controls will destroy you for your awareness.
       | 
       | The MKS[1] one hundred years ago spoke of crude tools for
       | developing "mindfulness" and allowing the "master mind" to emerge
       | (you discover you are not alone in your mind.) superficially this
       | is blamed for positive thinking as "the secret". The "secret" is
       | others can hear your thoughts and take mischievous (or
       | benevolent) interest in our interests.
       | 
       | [1] https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Master_Key_System
        
       | mettamage wrote:
       | I did an ask HN recently if there's something similar with
       | stoicism [1]. I'd like to put the question into the public
       | limelight again, since stoicism and mindfulness meditation share
       | commonalities. They are also very different, so perhaps my
       | question is silly. Then again, it was also silly with regards to
       | meditation, until it wasn't.
       | 
       | [1] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34855673
        
         | matthewaveryusa wrote:
         | I think the key is to not surrender yourself to meditation.
         | It's a means to your ambitious ends. A stoic with no ambition
         | is just a push-over.
        
       | jmfldn wrote:
       | My personal take is that mindfulness as a stress reliever is
       | normally fine in small doses. It can often be very beneficial in
       | lowering stress. If you have a known underlying mental health
       | problem however, I would recommend taking this up with some prior
       | medical consultation all the same.
       | 
       | Mindfulness employed as part of a spiritual practice however,
       | should be practiced within the right context and with the right
       | guidance. You have to remember that mindfulness is Buddhist in
       | origin and, as a practice, sits within a whole web of practices
       | that all support and interpenetrate. You absolutely cannot remove
       | mindfulness from the other aspects of the path. It makes no sense
       | to divorce it from right livelihood, right effort etc.
       | 
       | Tldr. If you want spiritual progression, respect the tradition.
       | That might sound a little conservative, but this is my own take
       | on it at least. Jumping into a long retreat with no prior
       | exposure to this amount of meditation and without a wider
       | practice to ground it in, is not wise imho.
        
       | ghoastl wrote:
       | My most intense mindfulness experience was on a two-week silent
       | retreat, in the woods, isolated from all of humanity. At the
       | beginning, I met only the creatures of the forest and heard only
       | the whispers of the trees.
       | 
       | By the sixth day I was hallucinating gold and purple snakes
       | slithering out of my belly onto the ground around me.
       | 
       | By the eighth day I had visions of a cloud island vista with
       | animals the world had never seen. They were cautious but
       | friendly, and rode with me until the end of my journey that day.
       | 
       | By the twelfth day, I could see nothing but heard the most
       | beautiful music. Melodies and harmonies fluttered and floated
       | across my audible plane, bringing an intense sense of peace and
       | joy.
       | 
       | When I left that place, I was a changed spirit. I may have been
       | alone in physical form, but the universe embraced my inner self
       | and showed me the path to enlightenment.
        
         | nprateem wrote:
         | Sounds like your upper chakras opened. Well done on making
         | great progress. Sounds like an amazing experience.
         | 
         | It's no surprise these experiences are often misinterpreted as
         | psychosis by people without an awareness of where deep
         | meditative states can lead.
        
           | emptyfile wrote:
           | [dead]
        
         | AstixAndBelix wrote:
         | [flagged]
        
           | JoachimS wrote:
           | Calling him a liar is quite uncalled for.
        
           | nicolas_t wrote:
           | There's a rather big difference between hiking and
           | meditating. Solitary hikers in general hike, they don't spend
           | their time trying to lose their sense of self.
        
         | subrat_rout wrote:
         | Mind disclosing the name of retreat and place where one can
         | attend?
        
         | mahathu wrote:
         | You're describing a psychosis.
        
           | bary12 wrote:
           | It's only a problem if they experience psychosis in their
           | daily life when they don't want to. Any mental illness is
           | only considered an illness when it causes impairment of
           | function. other than that, probably equivalent to
           | hallucinatory drugs.
        
           | detourdog wrote:
           | Maybe everyone should experience a little psychosis.
        
             | kayodelycaon wrote:
             | Having had two psychotic breaks, I do not recommend the
             | experience. The last one caused something like hardware-
             | level damage that took years for my brain to recover from.
        
               | detourdog wrote:
               | No doubt they are serious. After I made my comment I
               | thought about editing it provide nuance.
               | 
               | My problem is more about language and giving names to
               | things and society adherence to the mean. As children we
               | experience many psychotic breaks as we adjust to the
               | world. It could be that as we mature the frequency is
               | reduced but that doesn't mean the episodes are inherently
               | bad. They could be a normal part of a consciousness's
               | maturation.
        
               | [deleted]
        
               | kayodelycaon wrote:
               | > As children we experience many psychotic breaks as we
               | adjust to the world.
               | 
               | Neat, I didn't know this. Where could I read about it? :)
               | 
               | Most of the google results I'm getting talk about
               | childhood schizophrenia. (Which is a thing and quite
               | serious.)
        
               | detourdog wrote:
               | Sorry I'm winging it based on experience:) That just
               | happens to be my observation and why I spoke up.
        
               | arbitrage wrote:
               | so what you mean to say is that you're just making things
               | up as you go? neat.
        
               | detourdog wrote:
               | True, but I don't see that as distinguishing me from
               | anyone else.
        
               | kayodelycaon wrote:
               | Either we have different definitions of psychotic break
               | or you're a pretty high outlier. I don't know anyone from
               | my bipolar support group who had a psychotic break before
               | puberty. Most of them haven't had one.
               | 
               | I had bipolar symptoms at age 5 and severe depression at
               | 9, but didn't have a break until I was 26.
        
               | detourdog wrote:
               | I grew up in a dynamic environment with plenty therapy
               | and hospitalizations. There is definitely something on my
               | mother's side. Suffice to say that I have a lifetime of
               | experience. I think about the human side and the
               | philosophical side. I'm only speaking from life
               | experience and an effort to frame and understand the
               | issues.
        
               | mahathu wrote:
               | Experiencing psychotic breaks in your childhood
               | distinguishes you from other people though. It is not a
               | common experience.
        
               | detourdog wrote:
               | These may be original thoughts conceived by an
               | individual. If one needs third party verification for
               | ideas read no further.
               | 
               | I see great similarity in childhood tantrums and
               | psychotic breaks. I believe a more warn/mature
               | consciousness may have a negative reaction to large
               | shifts changes in its perceptual comprehension. There can
               | be a number of causes for that change which may affect
               | duration.
               | 
               | As for childhood psychotic breaks. I believe they are
               | common. The undeveloped consciousness is so malleable
               | that it is just part of perceiving and comprehending the
               | world. As we mature we experience fewer upheavals but we
               | also gather neuroses.
               | 
               | I'm surprised to have my credentials questioned on an
               | anonymous Internet forum.
        
             | [deleted]
        
           | ghoastl wrote:
           | I am describing my experience. If you make the choice to
           | medicalize my words, that is your own interpretation. But you
           | were not there, you do not know.
        
             | fluoridation wrote:
             | You yourself describe it as a hallucinatory state, though.
             | Were you aware that you were hallucinating at the time, or
             | is it only in retrospect that you're able to realize that?
        
               | akomtu wrote:
               | In a country of deaf men, would hearing sounds count as
               | hallucinations?
        
         | bruce343434 wrote:
         | You seem to have suffered a psychosis, actually
        
       | TurkishPoptart wrote:
       | >According to a 2017 report by Marketdata Enterprises, the U.S.
       | meditation market is predicted to grow to 2 billion dollars by
       | 2022.
       | 
       | There is no need for a "meditation market", and the term itself
       | is absurd. Can I make a shameless plug for Vipassana here? In the
       | tradition of the Buddha, the Vipassana school offers classes and
       | retreats worldwide, and they do not charge a time; only accepting
       | donations and service in return. dhamma.org
        
       | frellus wrote:
       | Serenity, now ... insanity, later
       | 
       | Hoochi-mama! Hoochi-mama!
        
       | Decabytes wrote:
       | From what I have read, negative experiences from mindfulness
       | practice have more to do with the fast food way of approaching it
       | that we go about it in the west.
       | 
       | It requires a much slower progression that is usually done with a
       | more experienced mentor, who will guide you through the process
       | and help you when you encounter these issues.
       | 
       | These techniques are powerful and helpful and can definitely help
       | alleviate stress and anxiety, but like in the Nietzsche quote
       | 
       | "Beware that, when fighting monsters, you yourself do not become
       | a monster... for when you gaze long into the abyss. The abyss
       | gazes also into you"
       | 
       | The way we teach it in the west does not equip us for when the
       | abyss gazes back
        
       | version_five wrote:
       | Serenity Now!
        
       | simmanian wrote:
       | If people are looking for a guided way to learn Buddhism and its
       | practices, there is an online English course designed to
       | introduce you to the teachings and integrate you into the
       | community. You do have to attend virtual sessions with your
       | camera on. Please feel free to ask me for details if this
       | interests you.
        
       | dmillar wrote:
       | _The next four hours were a hellscape of terror, panic and
       | paranoia..._
       | 
       |  _Finally, after hours, the attack smoldered and I drifted off.
       | It was the worst night of my life.
       | 
       | The next morning, while making coffee..._
        
         | BrianHenryIE wrote:
         | Caffeine addiction is real.
        
       | coldtea wrote:
       | There's no Buddhism in the West, but in name.
       | 
       | Buddhism is a religion associated with a way of life and a
       | culture. It's not something a businessman does on a "weekend
       | retreat" as "mindfulness practice" to get back in the rat race
       | refreshed.
        
         | Lacerda69 wrote:
         | real Buddhism hasn't been tried yet
        
           | coldtea wrote:
           | It has.
           | 
           | My distinction is not about doing it well either or going to
           | reach the "real" nirvana or whatever.
           | 
           | I'm seeing it in the anthropological sense, as a particular
           | historical artifact. It's truth is in doing it because you
           | were steeped in a Buddhist tradition/environment, as opposed
           | as doing it as consumer lifestyle choice/hobby.
        
             | lanstin wrote:
             | If your parents tried it as a lifestyle choice, and you
             | yourself grow up with people bowing to statues of Lord
             | Buddha and chanting the Heart Sutra and performing dana
             | rituals for your school grades, then where is the
             | inauthenticity?
             | 
             | It all flows together, reforming excessively strict early
             | Hinduism, meditation in the forest, take these lessons and
             | judge for yourself how they help, going to China with the
             | Dhamma, going back to China for meditation lessons,
             | bringing the practice of just sitting to the US when so few
             | in Japan meditate, every where you look one sees traditions
             | and insights flowing together in this great common effort
             | to heal the suffering around and within us.
             | 
             | I meditate because life become impossible without it.
             | Always now, always here, the authentic past is another
             | category our mind creates and places into the wholeness.
             | One cannot be an authentic first monk in California, but
             | one can sit still with attention and silence and focus. One
             | can be rude to other Buddhists or respectful to them.
             | 
             | As meditation makes it easier to see what is on its own
             | apart from what I expected, the effects will vary depending
             | on what one isn't seeing clearly. So caution is warranted.
             | Normally retraumatizing oneself isn't helpful or skillful,
             | but change will happen whether we fear it or long for it.
             | Just make sure to sleep when tired and eat when hungry and
             | pay attention within and without and it will work out.
        
             | theodric wrote:
             | "Real communism has never been tried" is a meme. GP is
             | referencing this meme.
        
               | coldtea wrote:
               | I know, hence my use of the similar idea of "really
               | existing Bhuddism" (a reference to "really existing
               | socialism").
        
         | wodenokoto wrote:
         | It's definitely something a Thai business man would do though.
        
           | coldtea wrote:
           | Even the Thai businessman (and the whole country) has been
           | quite removed from the culture that made Buddhism have a
           | meaning there (as opposed to an empty shell).
           | 
           | Though, even so, he'd still be far closer to it than someone
           | in San Francisco who adopted it as a consumer lifestyle
           | good...
        
             | ImHereToVote wrote:
             | Yeah, only the Nepalese are pure enough to be Buddhists.
             | 
             | I for one applaud the Taliban for blowing up statues of the
             | Buddha. They aren't posers like we are.
        
             | CitizenKane wrote:
             | I'm not sure where your experience is from, but Buddhism is
             | an integral part of Thai life and culture and I've seen
             | this play out on a pragmatic level in many ways.
        
           | ImHereToVote wrote:
           | [flagged]
        
         | rg111 wrote:
         | Where did Buddha define Buddhism?
         | 
         | Even in time of Buddha, there were thousands of Buddhists who
         | were practising Buddhist while remaining in a family.
         | 
         | Buddha, once addressing Ananda, told him that there were
         | hundreds of disciples who attained Nirvana while remaining in a
         | family and with a profession.
         | 
         | I find this kind of opposition to Western Buddhist practices
         | absolitely repulsive and baseless.
         | 
         | Yes, I studied Buddhist scriptures extensively, with guides,
         | and really, you don't need to burn insence sticks and bow k
         | times before a statue to be a Buddhist.
        
           | denton-scratch wrote:
           | > you don't need to burn insence sticks and bow k times
           | before a statue to be a Buddhist.
           | 
           | That's what would be called "devotional practices". I didn't
           | care for all that - pujas, foundation practices, 100,000
           | prostrations and so on. I wanted to do the insight practices,
           | and gain insight.
           | 
           | What I later learned is that you _have to_ do devotional
           | practices as well as insight practices. A bird can 't fly
           | with just one wing. Devotional practices supposedly give you
           | the confidence to deal with awakening insight.
           | 
           | /me no longer a practitioner or a Buddhist.
        
             | sinuhe69 wrote:
             | Not only give you confidence, it also guides you to deal
             | with the issues arisen from your insight practices.
        
           | coldtea wrote:
           | > _Even in time of Buddha, there were thousands of Buddhists
           | who were practising Buddhist while remaining in a family._
           | 
           | Which is neither here, nor there.
           | 
           | My distinction is not about following Buddhist as "true to
           | the spirit of Buddha" or not. It's not about "studying" or
           | not, either.
           | 
           | It's about Buddhist as a historical phenomenon, a tradition,
           | emergent and adopted by specific cultures in specific ways of
           | life, and being passed on, versus Buddhism as a consumer
           | lifestyle choice, from some people millions of miles away, in
           | a totally different culture and mindset, who adopted it as
           | one of the "free to chose" religious or lifestyle fads
           | available on their spirituality (or worse, wellness) market.
        
             | rg111 wrote:
             | I fully agree with your comment. But what you and pigsty
             | keep repeating is that: "if it is free to choose, and
             | lifestyle based approach adopted by anyone in West", it is
             | wrong.
             | 
             | I don't agree with this.
        
             | javier123454321 wrote:
             | So do you say that it is impossible to be a buddhist in the
             | west? Maybe, but as a person that has been practicing a
             | single tradition for a decade, made many life decisions
             | based on that as the fundamental center of my life, helped
             | run centers and actually see my work and family life
             | completely integrated with my spiritual practice (and I
             | chose to do so freely), your comment is comical. Anyway, I
             | never strove to be a "buddhist".
        
         | nativecoinc wrote:
         | For sure. Most people would agree that doing something as a
         | fitness regiment is not a religion.
         | 
         | But you say that there is "no Buddhism" in the West. Clearly
         | there are people who practice Buddhism in the West, whether
         | that be "Western Buddhism" or something else. So one can only
         | surmise that your argument is the following:
         | 
         | Only Asians can be Buddhist.
         | 
         | Well, that's quite essentialist and othering towards Asians.
         | But what other conclusion could there be? Because if you
         | dialogue with such a person, they will continually raise the
         | bar for being "Buddhist", starting with pure merit and
         | dedication (like: refrains from killing their parents; is nice
         | to people; follows the N8XP) and then devolving into pseudo-
         | anthropology like how Sri Lankans have different lifestyles
         | compared to a Dutch person, or how Thai people might believe (I
         | don't know?) in jungle/forest spirits.
         | 
         | Eventually you realize that the only way a born-in-the-West
         | person could become a Buddhist, according to this completely
         | wrongheaded interpretation of "lived experience", is to do the
         | following:
         | 
         | 1. Be drafted into the Vietnam War
         | 
         | 2. Get amnesia caused by a shrapnel stuck in your skull
         | 
         | 3. Get lost in the Vietnamese jungle
         | 
         | 4. Eventually find a village and become adopted
         | 
         | 5. Learn the local language somehow
         | 
         | 6. Become a Buddhist by being immersed in the "way of life and
         | culture"
        
           | coldtea wrote:
           | > _Well, that's quite essentialist and othering towards
           | Asians._
           | 
           | It's rather seeing a religious tradition in its historical
           | context, and recognizing its environment.
           | 
           | It's "western buddhism" that is both orientalism (exoticizing
           | the other) and a form of cultural appropriation and
           | cheapining an original thing.
           | 
           | Note that I don't say that that they are "better Buddhists"
           | or "closer to what Buddha meant" etc, as those are
           | irrelevant. They are authentic even if they are bad at it or
           | indifferent to it.
           | 
           | > _Eventually you realize that the only way a born-in-the-
           | West person could become a Buddhist, according to this
           | completely wrongheaded interpretation of "lived experience",
           | is to do the following_
           | 
           | That would be a good way, yes.
           | 
           | At least they wouldn't be a tourist at it.
        
         | gtirloni wrote:
         | No True Scotsman? Or are you saying that in most cases it's
         | just superficial?
         | 
         | I certainly have met Buddhism pratictioners in the West that
         | were deep into the way of life and culture.
        
           | pigsty wrote:
           | For the most part, western Buddhism is about good vibes bro
           | and meditating and is, for all intents and purposes,
           | irreligious and more of a general life philosophy (like how
           | waking up at 5 am, jogging, and eating organic isn't a
           | religion either).
           | 
           | Buddhist buddhism involves demons, hell, and more praying or
           | even chanting than meditating for the general population.
           | Most Buddhists probably don't meditate at all, actually. Some
           | western Buddhists probably have amulets to ward off demons
           | and make fruit offerings to bodhisattvas, but it's very
           | uncommon. But it's the norm in Asia.
        
             | KingOfCoders wrote:
             | I feel uncomfortable on how you generalize Buddhism, with
             | it's many strands in India, China, Japan and all over Asia
             | - generalizing 500M people.
        
               | pigsty wrote:
               | I've been to temples all over Asia, visit them weekly,
               | and referenced the unifying elements.
               | 
               | It's like saying Christians pray and worship god. That's
               | not a generalization. That's Christianity.
        
             | rg111 wrote:
             | > Buddhist buddhism involves demons, hell, and more praying
             | or even chanting than meditating for the general
             | population.
             | 
             | You are mentioning Mahayana or later Vajrayana Buddhism.
             | 
             | Buddha never asks you to pray, and he did not teach any
             | concepts of hells or demons.
             | 
             | Please stop appropriating Buddhism. You have no authority.
             | 
             | Just like Christianity practised in the US is not true
             | Christianity, Buddhism practised in East Asia is no truer
             | Buddhism.
             | 
             | And yes, Buddhism and its teachings are watered down in the
             | West. But Western Buddhism, when not watered down, is no
             | less truer than incense burning, praying, hell-believing
             | Eastern Buddhism.
        
               | coldtea wrote:
               | > _Just like Christianity practised in the US is not true
               | Christianity, Buddhism practised in East Asia is no truer
               | Buddhism._
               | 
               | That's the "really existing Buddhism" - the kind that
               | matters, and the only kind with roots in a millenia old
               | tradition.
               | 
               | The rest is either spirituallity tourists using it as a
               | lifestyle accessory (the same way they'd adopt pilates or
               | switch to some new age shit), or spirituallity "nerds"
               | getting into an exotic religion (usually in a bizarro
               | version as landed on their shores and according to the
               | spiritual fads of the time it caught on, mid-20th
               | century) to study the scriptures and debate "ways" and
               | versions.
        
               | fluoridation wrote:
               | >That's the "really existing Buddhism" - the kind that
               | matters, and the only kind with roots in a millenia old
               | tradition.
               | 
               | First, even if this "pseudo-Buddhism" is a lame imitation
               | by Westerners, the fact that it's an _imitation_ means
               | that it shares the same roots with  "proper Buddhism".
               | Second, why is proper Buddhism "the only one that
               | matters"? I would say none of it matters, you would say
               | only one of them matters, and there's probably some
               | people who say both of them matter. By what criterion
               | does one opinion take precedence?
        
               | pigsty wrote:
               | Western Buddhism is based off an aesthetic interpretation
               | of Zen Buddhism.
               | 
               | If Buddhism in East Asia is appropriation and people in
               | East Asia have no authority to talk about it, defending
               | western Buddhism, which is based off the customs of a
               | Japanese interpretation (based off a Chinese branch), is
               | a strange turn to take.
               | 
               | (hell is mentioned within the context of Theravada as
               | well)
        
               | rg111 wrote:
               | > Western Buddhism is based off
               | 
               | There is nothing well-defined as "Western Buddhism". The
               | _western buddhism_ I studied is based on Theraveda, and
               | not Mahayana or Zen.
               | 
               | > If Buddhism in East Asia is appropriation and people in
               | East Asia have no authority
               | 
               | No, they indeed do not. Western Buddhists or someone who
               | learned from them don't tell these people that they are
               | doing Buddhism wrongly, and should change. So, someone
               | like you shouldn't tell Westerners that their practice is
               | wrong and baseless and East Asian is version is the one
               | true one.
        
               | midiguy wrote:
               | Have you even cracked open the Pali Canon upon which
               | Theravada is based? It is rife with references to
               | devas/demons and heavenly/hellish realms, purportedly
               | spoken by the Buddha himself.
        
               | denton-scratch wrote:
               | > hell is mentioned within the context of Theravada as
               | well
               | 
               | As far as I'm aware, Theravada is a body of teaching that
               | developed late - around the same time as Mahayana. It's
               | not some kind of "what the Buddha actually taught".
        
               | pigsty wrote:
               | It's the oldest branch.
        
               | denton-scratch wrote:
               | So they claim.
        
             | nativecoinc wrote:
             | Right on, brother. My friend from from Bhutan wants to get
             | into Christianity by reading the Bible like a nerd. I keep
             | reminding her that most Christians where I come from (the
             | Old World, so authentic) mostly only go to church on
             | Sundays and only follow the Ten Commandments to the degree
             | that they don't kill people.
        
           | coldtea wrote:
           | > _I certainly have met Buddhism pratictioners in the West
           | that were deep into the way of life and culture._
           | 
           | They are "big in the way of life and culture" the same way
           | they'd be deep in punk rock or effective altruism.
           | 
           | Not as people living in a culture and tradition that is
           | Buddhist - in an environment that nurtered and fosters its
           | practice, and with all that comes from actual living
           | tradition of a religion. It's more like pilates.
           | 
           | They then switch it off and go be whatever they are everyday.
        
             | d-z-m wrote:
             | There are monastics in the West, perhaps you're simply
             | unaware of them.
             | 
             | Your "No True Buddhist" argument is sweeping and
             | fallacious.
        
             | jshaqaw wrote:
             | Rather sweeping statements about an awful lot of people you
             | have never met.
             | 
             | It is actually easier to be superficial with spiritual
             | practice when immersed in its culture. Plenty of
             | "spiritual" practitioners are playing social status games,
             | going through motions in a societally rewarded and expected
             | manner, etc...
             | 
             | Perhaps friend you are projecting your own dissatisfactions
             | with finding an all encompassing one true meaning onto
             | others?
        
               | lib-dev wrote:
               | Agreed. In fact a true follower of the Buddha would
               | eventually get the point where they wish to try to
               | integrate back into the business world if that's where
               | they came from. Lots of karma to resolve there lol.
        
       | nabla9 wrote:
       | It's really frustrating when intensive meditation is sold as
       | always positive. Like you can't get injured, and even if you do
       | you did something wrong.
       | 
       | I have been meditating 20 years, and I have gone trough intensive
       | retreats, so I share.
       | 
       | If you read Buddhist sutras, you find out that Buddha experienced
       | similar and worse while meditating. Going into horrible states of
       | mind at some point is what almost everybody goes trough if they
       | meditate intensively at some point. That's not Buddhism going bad
       | that's what Buddhism has been for 2000 years. If you stay in
       | monasteries long enough, you see monks recovering from bad
       | experience, even some rare cases who are permanently broken
       | somehow. That's rare but it happens.
       | 
       | If your image of intensive meditation is "maintaining constant
       | calm", or that "middle path" means no storms just the calm, you
       | are mistaken. Human's don't naturally pay attention into their
       | inner workings as much as they do in intensive meditation,
       | something will happen. That's why you are doing it.
       | 
       | Living normal hectic life and doing intensive meditation retreats
       | can be a problem. If you live in a monastery or similar place
       | where you meditate 3-4 hours daily, attending intensive retreats
       | is more balanced experience. Taking one year sabbatical and doing
       | nothing but meditation was important step for me.
        
       | 2devnull wrote:
       | I'm inclined to think this stuff is more correlation than
       | causation.
       | 
       | Meditating is a weird thing to do. Outside of eastern religious
       | practice at least. You get some some semi-normal people who do
       | it, ray dalio comes to mind, but mostly it attracts people who
       | aren't mentally well to begin with. It's exactly the group of
       | people you'd expect to have these kinds of problems. The same
       | group that should avoid weed and shrooms and for the same
       | reasons. There are a lot of these people on hn and in the tech
       | world, overachievers high on the neuroticism scale. A normal
       | person doesn't meditate more than 30 minutes a day. That alone is
       | a symptom of deeper issues.
        
         | louison11 wrote:
         | Nobody is mentally well to begin with. Suffering is universal.
         | You simply get people who are ready to deal with their
         | suffering and seek help through appropriate practices, and
         | people who are in denial and convince themselves they're fine.
         | There are a lot of very wise, sane, stable people who meditate
         | a lot more than 30 minutes a day.
        
           | 2devnull wrote:
           | There is a spectrum, on one end well adapted, psychologically
           | advantaged individuals, and at the other end people who are
           | more prone to suffering or various difficulties. I cited ray
           | dalio as one of many examples of same, wise stable people.
           | That there is a bell curve is obviously the case. Most people
           | do not meditate daily. Of those that do, the tendency to have
           | psychological issues is greater than in the set of
           | individuals that do not.
        
         | sixo wrote:
         | That meditation reliably causes these crisis events (so much
         | that it's an acknowledged "stage" of the process; the "dark
         | night of the soul" term comes from the Roman Catholic
         | contemplative tradition which maybe doesn't refer to the same
         | thing but has a similar role in the process) is pretty much THE
         | criteria to establish causation; that it only happens to a
         | portion of meditators additionally rules out "the kind of
         | person who would meditate is going to have this happen anyway".
         | 
         | Meditating IS weird but, historically, not nearly as weird as
         | a-spirituality, which is the state of the "normal person" in
         | your comment.
         | 
         | And, of course the drive to meditate reflects some difference
         | relative to the general population, but "symptoms of deeper
         | issues" implies buy-in to a kind of the therapeutic/mental-
         | health framework of "if you're unable to exist within the range
         | of 'normal' all the time, you have a disease" and, well, it
         | seems pretty reasonable to be discontent with your life--either
         | your life or your feelings needs to change, and emotional
         | searching is kind of the obvious way to address that.
        
           | 2devnull wrote:
           | My intent was to single out a-spiritual meditation.
           | Meditation that occurs as part of an established program of
           | spiritual practice, that goes along with other aspects of
           | religion within a centuries old framework is obviously the
           | opposite of weird. It is normal.
           | 
           | Whether what you call crisis events that are part of the
           | process is == psychotic episodes seems dubious to me. The
           | psychosis I hear reported from more extreme "aspiritual"
           | meditators doesn't sound productive but disabling and in many
           | cases permanently so. In the context of established religion,
           | such things are "selected against" in the Darwinian sense.
           | Anything that's part of the process within the context of a
           | long running time tested religious framework, be it Buddhism,
           | Catholicism, Hasidism etc... must be evolutionarily
           | advantageous (in a institutional not biological sense).
        
         | twobitshifter wrote:
         | You're saying it's a selection bias, but the author claims most
         | people with these symptoms had no previous mental issues.
         | 
         | Further, meditating is marketed as addressing emotional issues
         | and if it's not doing that, it's either a placebo or worse
         | potentially harmful to the people most likely to try it.
        
           | 2devnull wrote:
           | Most people who have a psychotic episode have never had a
           | prior psychotic episode.
           | 
           | Meditation being marketed as a solution to emotional
           | (psychological) issues is precisely the point I'm trying to
           | make.
           | 
           | This is the same problem with detecting the link between
           | antidepressants and suicide. The link between Prozac and
           | suicide was noted in the 80s but written off as correlation.
           | Because correlation is just as plausible an explanation as
           | causation is. It's difficult to not to conflate the two.
           | 
           | In the case of meditation, I don't see many people
           | acknowledging the possibility that mental health problems
           | could be correlated _with_ , as opposed to caused _by_ ,
           | meditation itself.
           | 
           | Most people I know are psychologically healthy and do not
           | meditate. The people I know who have turned to meditation
           | have done it help with their problems (physical or
           | emotional). I wouldn't argue that it's a perfect or even
           | strong correlation, merely that the correlation is there and
           | it may be enough to explain these somewhat rare outcomes from
           | meditation practice.
        
       | nidnogg wrote:
       | Great write-up. Where I'm based, there are not a lot of
       | meditation retreats at all. It's often something that's not
       | really talked about but even then I wasn't aware at all that
       | these side effects were out there. The most I went through as a
       | short mindfulness class in college, and I absolutely thought it
       | would be beneficial to go deeper into it eventually. I could
       | never find the time or (mostly) patience to follow up with it
       | afterwards.
       | 
       | Having had almost life ruining psychosis for pandemic related
       | reasons in between then and now, reading this makes me glad I
       | didn't and keen to learn more on this side of the issue.
        
       | thenerdhead wrote:
       | When I read articles like this, I'm reminded that you can
       | overdose by taking any extreme. It was a great read discussing
       | their experience, but seems to warn a very small dedicated group
       | who will take it to the extreme when very few will ever do so in
       | the first place.
       | 
       | The stoics, buddhists, and taoists all had a similar idea of
       | moderation of two extremes. The similar idea of having a dark
       | night of the soul because you are imbalanced in some way leading
       | to a crisis of faith. Even Shugendo/Yamabushi practices are a
       | long extended journey where meditation is met with physical
       | exhaustion. Thus it balances itself out.
       | 
       | It's a lifelong practice and seems the awareness is doing its job
       | of making one aware of the pain to work through. I don't think
       | Buddhism is the problem here, the over attachment to it seems to
       | have left the author with suffering.
        
         | SV_BubbleTime wrote:
         | > I met her by happenstance, nine months before my disastrous
         | retreat. She was leading a conference called "Do No Harm" in
         | Los Angeles about adverse effects of meditation.
         | 
         | This among other parts make me wonder if the author doesn't
         | have another side to the story of their life. They mention the
         | drinking and the drugs, but...
         | 
         | I wonder what would have happened had they not gone to this
         | event, not known there was someone out there educating on the
         | bad sides of meditation, etc.
         | 
         | No offense to the guy at all, but I consider the narrator
         | unreliable.
        
       | hot_topic wrote:
       | Even more proof that mindfulness is about deeply analyzing the
       | pressures on your own individual self
        
       | rdevsrex wrote:
       | What OP describes sounds like the common bad trip with various
       | psychedelics. Of course there are differences, but it's very easy
       | to get yourself into a state of mind that you can't easily get
       | out of for hours on end. Definitely not fun.
        
       | meindnoch wrote:
       | Sorry for the loss of your old self. Your life will never be the
       | same as before. Once you peek behind the curtains, you can't un-
       | see what you saw there.
        
       | scotty79 wrote:
       | If you have similar symptoms it might be chronic caffeine
       | overdose. Stop drinking coffee (or switch to deacf) and tea for
       | few weeks to rule it out.
        
       | dr-detroit wrote:
       | [dead]
        
       | [deleted]
        
       | phkahler wrote:
       | >> What we do share is a feeling that's common among those who
       | have had traumatic experiences: neglect, shame and a sense of
       | being unheard by those in power.
       | 
       | They might want to read "Running on Empty" - the book notes that
       | various forms of emotional neglect can have effects like trauma,
       | but this is often overlooked by psychologist and therapists. I
       | enjoyed the part in the article where the author said they
       | finally allowed themself to be angry and wanted to ask "who
       | should that anger really be directed at?"
        
       | groffee wrote:
       | See how many times they write the word 'I'?
       | 
       | They've never meditated properly even once. Teacher my ass, these
       | people do way more damage than help anyone.
        
         | nayroclade wrote:
         | Do you meditate? Because if it leads to an attitude like you're
         | displaying, it's not a great advertisment.
        
           | dijit wrote:
           | Well.
           | 
           | https://www.psychnewsdaily.com/study-links-mindfulness-
           | medit...
        
             | detourdog wrote:
             | I had a hard time with this article. The pool the subjects
             | were pulled from is suspect to me. They also didn't
             | interview any Rabbis, Priests, Mullahs,.... They study
             | spirituality of a small subset of people pursuing it.
        
               | dijit wrote:
               | Mindfulness as practiced by the typical western audience
               | (largely secular, young professionals) _is_ well
               | represented.
               | 
               | If you want to take something else away or are looking
               | for alternative discussions about the nature of
               | spirituality itself: go ahead, but that's not the study
               | for that.
               | 
               | Only mindfulness meditation as practiced in western
               | society in the fashionable way.
        
               | detourdog wrote:
               | I disagree. The pool seems to be derived from students
               | and professionals of mindfulness. I believe mindfulness
               | can be practiced outside of that group. That group also
               | seems like the most confused group of people practicing
               | mindfulness.
               | 
               | Mindfulnesss practiced in a fashionable way seems like
               | the bottom of the barrel of mindfulness.
               | 
               | Maybe I did read the article with the wrong point of
               | view. I thought it was posted to support the notion that
               | Mindfulness is flawed.
        
               | dijit wrote:
               | Mindfulness as practiced by people in the west in the
               | fashionable fashion gives people a sense of superiority.
               | 
               | Thats the crux of what is spelled out at length, could
               | the study be improved? Maybe.
               | 
               | But I see no evidence here of anything else, so until it
               | is replicated or failed to replicate it will be my
               | opinion.
        
               | manuelmoreale wrote:
               | Maybe secular young professionals all share some trait
               | that can be associated with sense of superiority? And
               | it's not really about mindfulness or meditation?
        
               | dijit wrote:
               | study controls for that.
        
               | detourdog wrote:
               | I didn't go back to read check but my memory is that it
               | was around 531 participants. So with that sample size who
               | know how small the control group is. In any case it
               | certainly is dominating more of my life than I'm
               | comfortable with right now.
        
         | dinkleberg wrote:
         | How is one to write a story of their personal story in which
         | they are the main, and for the most part the only character,
         | without using the word "I" all the time?
        
           | fluoridation wrote:
           | "Rather than retelling it as a subjective narrative, you
           | could retell it as an objective or omniscient narrator. It
           | would sound completely ridiculous if the listener realizes
           | that you're just telling your account from your perspective,
           | particularly if you need to refer to yourself in the third
           | person", said fluoridation as he thought how absurd the idea
           | even is.
        
         | fluoridation wrote:
         | What would be acceptable an acceptable number? Zero? More than
         | zero? How is it determined, and why is it important?
        
       | nprateem wrote:
       | Sounds like jhana worked and they awoke, via a Kundalini
       | awakening. It's a shame the teachers couldn't provide more
       | support.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | passion__desire wrote:
         | I would just say the feedback loops between awareness got
         | magnified by a lot. I would suggest the author to read the book
         | "Kundalini: The Evolutionary Energy in Man". In that book, Gopi
         | Krishna relates how his attention got fractured experienced
         | sensations far intense.
         | 
         | > Often in the silence and darkness of my room at night I found
         | myself looking with dread at horribly disfigured faces and
         | distorted forms bending and twisting into shapes, appearing and
         | disappearing rapidly in the shining medium, eddying and
         | swirling in and around me. They left me trembling with fear,
         | unable to account for their presence. At times, though such
         | occurrences were rare, I could perceive within the luminous
         | mist a brighter radiance emanating from a luciferous, ethereal
         | shape, with a hardly distinguishable face and figure, but
         | nevertheless a presence, emitting a lustre so soft, enchanting,
         | and soothing that on such occasions my mind overflowed with
         | happiness and an indescribable divine peace filled every fibre
         | of my being. Strangely enough, on every such occasion the
         | memory of the primary vision, which occurred on the first day
         | of the awakening, came vividly to me as if to hearten me in the
         | midst of despondency with a fleeting glimpse of a
         | supercondition towards which I was being painfully and
         | inexorably drawn.
        
           | nprateem wrote:
           | Yes, the author should totally study Kundalini. Krishna's
           | story is scary.
           | 
           | It's even mentioned in Mastering the Core Teachings of the
           | Buddha and The Mind Illuminated. Some traditions make it a
           | central component (tantric & yogic), while some ignore it
           | (Zen), but it's there in all of them. The core of religions
           | flowed out of these experiences IMO.
           | 
           | There should absolutely be greater awareness that this is
           | where meditation can lead if practiced with sufficient
           | intensity. It's hard to say what the frequency is, but the
           | centrality of these experiences and extrasensory stories
           | (e.g. the Buddha seeing spirits), suggests it's a widely
           | experienced phenomenon along the path. I mean, if the aim of
           | meditation is to awaken to the greater consciousness, then
           | one day you're going to have to experience it to progress.
           | 
           | This is where the West has lost its way. The culture has
           | swung so far in favour of materialism it rejects the idea of
           | universal consciousness, so sells mindfulness as simply brain
           | exercises. That means if someone experiences the bigger
           | reality they have no frame of reference and little support
           | like they would if they followed a tradition where these
           | experiences are more widely experienced.
        
             | dayvid wrote:
             | Agree 100%. Many western meditation practices, especially
             | mindfulness, take the soul and context out of meditation
             | and treat it like an extreme sport or pilates class.
             | Reminds me of when Tim Ferris went on a prolonged fast
             | before doing a mindfulness retreat and almost has a full
             | mental breakdown.
        
       | javier123454321 wrote:
       | In the west, many conflate meditation for stress release and
       | meditation for transcendence of the self.
       | 
       | If your goal is to develop yourself to go beyond every limitation
       | that you ever believed about yourself, to transcend every piece
       | of identity that you ever identified with in order to reach
       | enlightenment, then it is best to look for a teacher that:
       | 
       | 1. has achieved the goal you are after. (A teacher that practices
       | what they preach) 2. is willing to take you as a student 3. You
       | are willing to commit to their path and working through the
       | difficulties like the ones outlined in the post
       | 
       | Note that this is explicitly about no longer identifying with
       | your ego, and will be a very difficult, and sometimes dangerous
       | road. Otherwise, then take the advice of the article and just do
       | a little here and there.
       | 
       | Just don't conflate the two things, and - especially if you are
       | doing the latter - definitely don't go around shopping for a
       | bunch of different methods and try to practice them all as the
       | author did. Grab a method and stick with it, if it's not for you
       | then chose another one and stick with that, but don't fall into
       | the trap of trying to create your own medicine from the vastness
       | of teachings and methods.
        
       | 300bps wrote:
       | This article reminds me of the 28 year old mother that died from
       | water intoxication trying to win a Wii for her children in 2007.
       | 
       | https://www.cbsnews.com/news/jennifer-stranges-family-awarde...
       | 
       | I don't know what happened to the OP. Maybe he was experiencing
       | psychosis, maybe he was in some stage of enlightenment, maybe
       | he's the victim of a harmful practice.
       | 
       | But I do know he took mindfulness to an extreme that only a tiny
       | fraction do.
       | 
       | Anything in excess can kill you. Even drinking water. The 10 to
       | 20 minutes per day many mindfulness meditators do doesn't seem
       | likely to have the same effect as experienced by the OP.
        
       | snozolli wrote:
       | I'd like to know what physical activity and exercise the author
       | was getting during this period. I believe that 10 - 12 hours of
       | breath counting was mentioned, and I can't imagine that being
       | physically still for that long is good for the body. Some of the
       | stuff about involuntary jerking and the author's shoulder
       | reminded me of my experience with a pinched nerve due to a bulged
       | disc in my neck.
       | 
       | Also, I'm a bit suspicious of the quiet references to alcohol and
       | drugs. I'm far from a tee-totaler, but I recognize that one man's
       | casual drinking or smoking (i.e. THC) is another's depression or
       | anxiety-inducing dose.
        
       | [deleted]
        
       | binarysolo wrote:
       | This "meltdown" is a highly known outcome of the practice (and
       | kinda why people historically do it with guidance in a safe space
       | with a lot of time-honed set of best practices from thousands of
       | years of history).
       | 
       | It's kinda like people who are in reasonably healthy mental shape
       | suddenly decide to run an ultramarathon of the mind. I'm not sure
       | if OP may have the correct expectations.
        
       | jeremyt wrote:
       | I have quite a lot of experience with meditation. I've done
       | thousands of hours, including more than ten retreats that
       | involved sitting for as many as 18 hours per day.
       | 
       | I've also done many healing modalities, including somatic
       | experiencing.
       | 
       | From my perspective, we have taken "Buddhism" and "meditation"
       | and we have done what us Westerners almost always do: we boil it
       | down into "stuff that does stuff" and "everything else".
       | 
       | We are so intensely and impatiently interested in "doing stuff".
       | 
       | So, we have taken a tradition/religion that has existed for
       | thousands of years, includes many practices and parts, and we
       | have pulled out the part that "does stuff", and we call that
       | mindfulness.
       | 
       | But, if you really look at the tradition itself, particularly in
       | non-Zen forms of Buddhism, what you often see is what are called
       | "preliminary practices". Used to, if the Westerner goes east in
       | search of meditation instruction, he or she has to get special
       | permission to skip the preliminary practices.
       | 
       | And what our preliminary practices? In the West we call that
       | therapy.
       | 
       | So, this really important thing, that one must do therapy and
       | what they would call in the East "purification" before one is
       | ready to start meditating has been tossed aside because it
       | doesn't yield immediate results like a few days of mindfulness.
       | 
       | In addition, the traditions are almost totally unaware of our
       | understanding of trauma and the best they can do is use the
       | language of "demons".
       | 
       | So, I'm aware of "mindful-based stress reduction", but I'm not
       | intimately familiar with it. It doesn't make sense to me why
       | someone would use mindfulness to reduce stress or in place of a
       | therapeutic or trauma modality.
       | 
       | I mean, sometimes it is way more comfortable to not be aware of
       | things than to be aware of things. And, in my experience,
       | becoming aware of oneself is just a bunch of not fun
       | realizations, including realizations like "I'm a people pleaser"
       | or "I always sabotage relationships in a similar way".
       | 
       | These realizations are not fun because just seeing the truth or
       | the pattern doesn't change it, so you sit and watch yourself
       | doing the same shit over and over and not quite having the power
       | to change it... That requires much deeper meditation and
       | awareness.
       | 
       | At any point in this process, one can become too aware and too
       | burdened with one's issues, and that can result in all kinds of
       | stuff including breakdown and psychosis.
       | 
       | At the end of the day, meditation and mindfulness and all the
       | rest is basically just the matrix movie... Don't take the red
       | pill unless you really want the red pill because sleepwalking
       | through life unaware of one's issues and happily eating the steak
       | that isn't there is sometimes more pleasant.
       | 
       | Meditation is for those who want the truth, regardless of whether
       | it feels good or not. For everyone else, there's therapy.
        
         | whitepaint wrote:
         | Very beautifully put. I completely relate with the last 2
         | sentences. Do you have recommendations for books?
        
           | jeremyt wrote:
           | There are as many schools of thought and meditation
           | methodologies as there are people. What resonates with me may
           | not resonate with you.
           | 
           | Having said that, "Streams of Wisdom" by Dustin Diperna is,
           | IMO, the finest 40,000 foot view of meditation and spiritual
           | development that I know of.
           | 
           | For an actual no bullshit practical guide to meditation
           | Eckhart Tolle's "The power of now" is what I would point to.
           | You really need nothing more than this book.
        
           | javier123454321 wrote:
           | Find a teacher you trust, and inspires you to become like
           | them. Books can help, but I'd say to use them as a
           | compliment.
        
       | graderjs wrote:
       | Yeah maybe because your mind was too full. Don't be too full of
       | mind. Just meditation. Very simple. Let go. It's not easy, for
       | most people I think, but it is simple.
       | 
       | Good to see so much sensible awareness and respect of the
       | powerful nature of these practices here in the comments! It gives
       | me hope.
       | 
       | Also, I really wanna wholeheartedly agree with what one person
       | said which was that the people are probably not getting a lot of
       | exercise during that time. I think physical activity exercise is
       | so essential to mental health and the body's ability and the
       | mind's to regulate itself. Our bodies were evolved and designed
       | to require certain amount of movement every day, or fairly
       | fucking regularly and without that I mean, you just get mentally
       | ill, really. I mean, mostly. I mean you need regular physical
       | activity to maintain good mental and emotional and I believe
       | energetic health. So the physical activity is one thing that's
       | really important and actually one main point of hatha yoga is to
       | provide that physical activity foundation and to prepare the body
       | to be able to support those kinds of meditation practice.
       | 
       | I think another thing that's happening is our solar system is
       | passing through the galactic current sheet so there's more high
       | energy, radiation and particles impacting The earth, effects on
       | the magnetosphere as well as an uptick in solar events affecting
       | earth and so all of the stuff will drive people a little bit more
       | crazy.
       | 
       | Add that to as other comments, said how these meltdowns seem to
       | happen after intensive's. Also, consider the economic aspects of
       | these intensive that are normally high outlay sort of
       | transformation type workshop things that are at least from one
       | level, essentially designed to generate a large amount of money
       | from participants. I'm not saying everyone who creates those
       | things is shady at all, but I think there is that there's an
       | economic aspect of those things that is intensive as well, and
       | sometimes that probably coincides with less Karen attention to
       | authentic and safe practices, and consideration towards the
       | participants... and in any case for someone joining that it's not
       | the same as if you're just going to yoga class three times a week
       | or less for 90 minutes or whatever.
       | 
       | People don't realize how powerful some of these simple practices
       | are and they're playing with things they don't know how to
       | control and they don't know what they are and things get out of
       | hand. So doing those intensively day in and day out, the sort of
       | like the energetic equivalent of basically taking people to
       | Everest base camp and saying "well you know you've seen the intro
       | video and here's a map we will be with you in radio contact.
       | you're ready to go! up there is your direction."
       | 
       | The other thing I think is going on is that the Indians as in
       | people from the subcontinent, you know Hindus and others from
       | from India, I think well aware of the powerful effects on subtle
       | energy that these types of practices can have and people are
       | playing with energies and abilities and information that they
       | have no framework to understand or interpret, and they have no
       | ability to control, or even the awareness of what they're doing
       | on an energetic level. And things are bound to go wrong,
       | especially the sort of commoditization of commercialization of a
       | lot of these practices, at least in western countries although
       | it's probably happening in many places, things are bound to go
       | wrong in that case, where these powerful techniques are divorced
       | from the whole context of teaching and awareness for what they're
       | actually doing, and how do use them in a safe and sustainable
       | manner. That may sound to woo for some people but it's real and I
       | think some of what is happening is it by participating in the
       | such practices people are unwittingly unlocking and plugging into
       | these sorts of abilities, energies, information, and they don't
       | have the training or the framework or the ability to be able to
       | handle that and so they go nuts.
        
       | anon9931 wrote:
       | The place where I learned to do deep meditation also had a strong
       | emphasis on self-pacing. Maybe that would help reduce these kinds
       | of negative experiences. With meditation, more isn't better, and
       | it's important to stay grounded.
       | 
       | (Note that I rarely meditate anymore, but it did help me through
       | some difficult times)
       | 
       | https://www.aypsite.org/38.html - self pacing
       | 
       | https://www.aypsite.org/13.html - deep meditation
        
       | theusus wrote:
       | I was 2 months into the practice and I started getting delusions
       | and paranoia. And I still don't know why.
       | 
       | But I can say for sure that I am able to replicate the experience
       | if I start meditating.
        
       | nathan_compton wrote:
       | When I read this sort of thing I can't help but wonder whether
       | the problem is with the person here rather than with meditation
       | per se. Like I can't imagine a person with a healthy state of
       | mind thinking "Gee, I need to meditate intensely for 8+ hours a
       | day for fourteen days."
       | 
       | It sounds crazy already. No wonder it turned out badly.
        
       | justincredible wrote:
       | [dead]
        
       | pkrotich wrote:
       | Being mindful can open scary doors for sure... but something
       | about the article gives me the vibes of depersonalization opesode
       | of sort. Perhaps the effect of Marijuana + Mindfulness + Other
       | stuff?
       | 
       | I say that because a while back I started using CBD oil (yes, I
       | bought into awesome benefits in listicles!) AND it triggered the
       | worst 3 weeks of my life ever! Endless stream of panic attacks,
       | paranonia and Depersonalization-Derealization [1].
       | 
       | I'm never touching CBD again!
       | 
       | [1]- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depersonalization-
       | derealizatio...
        
       | fxtentacle wrote:
       | I'm submitting this article because I thought it was somewhat
       | objectively written and an interesting subject to consider. My
       | impression (from far away) of some of the meditation gurus is
       | also that they look like they are kinda addicted to their new
       | "hobby". Also, it's rarely healthy if your income depends on you
       | strongly believing in something (anything, really).
       | 
       | "60% of the participants reporting distressing experiences were
       | meditation teachers"
       | 
       | "Britton theorized that the effects of mindfulness might follow
       | an inverted U-shaped curve, where at some point therapeutic
       | returns not only diminish but mindfulness could have negative
       | side effects"
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | culebron21 wrote:
         | It was here on HN couple of years ago on top as well. Sadly,
         | the main reaction here is "he did it wrong" or "not hard
         | enough". Even though he addresses this objection in the
         | article.
        
         | dorchadas wrote:
         | I think these things are well known, and the problem is that
         | meditation is being lifted from its original context by people
         | who don't understand it - and who can't navigate these things
         | that are supposed to be navigated with teachers.
         | 
         | And then top it off by corporations promoting mindfulness as a
         | panacea for everything so they don't have to worry about fixing
         | underlying issues and can keep us running for longer, and I'm
         | surprised this isn't more commonly talked about.
        
       | andai wrote:
       | > Once we have crossed the Arising and Passing Away (and if we
       | don't suddenly die or get severe brain damage due to some
       | unfortunate life circumstances), we shall enter insight stages
       | five through ten regardless of whether we want to. It doesn't
       | matter if we practice from this point on; once we cross the A&P,
       | we are in the Dark Night to some degree and become what is
       | sometimes called a "Dark Night yogi", or simply "darknighter",
       | until we figure out how to get through it. If we do get through
       | it without getting to the first stage of enlightenment, we will
       | have to go through it again and again until we do. I mean this in
       | the most absolute terms. It appears to be a hardwired part of
       | human physiology as far as I can tell. I have a very large and
       | growing body of case studies and a wealth of shared experiences
       | among meditation friends and acquaintances to back this up, and I
       | am not alone. Tens of thousands of meditators have noticed these
       | stages in their own practice and countless teachers have noticed
       | them also.
       | 
       | Daniel Ingram, Mastering the Core Teachings of the Buddha
       | 
       | https://www.mctb.org/mctb2/table-of-contents/part-iv-insight...
        
         | wirrbel wrote:
         | btw. Daniel Ingram refers to himself as an Aharat/aharant and
         | it is kind of a no-no in buddhism to talk about your own
         | "awakening-status". That's a serious red-flag.
        
         | wirrbel wrote:
         | It should be noted that Daniel Ingram is following the Mahasi
         | sayadaw method and is a bit from of a fringe Buddhist
         | subculture promoting (if I am not confusing things ,,dry
         | insight" meditation).
         | 
         | Maybe the cultivation of the non-dry aspects is actually
         | helpful.
        
           | andai wrote:
           | I am a noob, does dry insight mean no concentration
           | practices? The book says a significant amount of
           | concentration practice is necessary before it is possible to
           | make any progress with insight practice, and also recommends
           | continuing concentration practice as a stabilizing and
           | comforting influence against the destabilizing and often
           | unpleasant insight journey.
        
             | wirrbel wrote:
             | I guess I am also a noob and I am not an expert on the
             | Mahasi method, but in general buddhist meditation has like
             | 3 pillars, metta (loving-kindness meditation, also features
             | self-love), samatha: (tranquility or calm abiding),
             | vipassana (insight). Samatha and vipassana would be
             | preconditions to awakening (bodhi).
             | 
             | samatha contains sati [mindfulness], samadhi [stable
             | attention], piti [joy], passaddhi [tranquility], upekkha
             | [equanimy]).
             | 
             | vipassana is insight (among others) into anicca
             | [impermanence], sunnata [emptyness], dukkha [stress],
             | paticcasamuppada [interdependence of phenomena], anatta
             | [no-observable self],....
             | 
             | The meditative states of jhana (dhyana in sanskrit, chan in
             | chinese, Zen in japanese although the meaning has changed
             | while the term traveled further east) originate from
             | samatha practice.
             | 
             | Overall most Theravada traditions or traditions that take
             | the pali canon as a source kind of use this metta,
             | samatha/sati, vipassana classification and acknowledge
             | jhanas as meditative states. However, the meditation
             | practice in the theravada tradition was revived in the
             | 19th/20th century only, so there is in the theravada
             | tradition no continuous meditation teaching lineage, so
             | people had to make sense of the Pali canon source texts,
             | which aren't exactly a meditation manual as we expect it
             | today and there are concurrent approaches.
             | 
             | I am just a casual meditator (like 2-3 times per week) but
             | overall an avid reader so I have seen quite a few different
             | takes on how metta, mindfulness and insight meditation
             | relate, most aren't dismissing one of these practices
             | entirely, but the order and emphasis on when to practice
             | what differ greatly. "dry-insight" is a I think to be
             | understood as a counterpoint to voices that stated that a
             | buddhist needs to practice concentration first and
             | potentially even reach the jhanas before practicing
             | Vipassana. So concentration / sati is not entirely
             | dismissed. The idea of "dry-insight" is, that fewer
             | meditation hours practicing concentration may be enough to
             | develop insights and it is thus also advertised as a
             | "quicker way" to awakening.
             | 
             | Overall, when reading or listening to meditation teachers,
             | I am cautious about claims to "speed", which makes me a bit
             | reserved about the Mahasi noting method crowd.
             | 
             | What made sense to me was: Laypeople should practice Metta
             | meditation in any case. Practicing Sati (mindfulness) and
             | Samadhi (concentration) is like taking your brain to the
             | gym & spa, it should also help you a lot in dealing with
             | stressful emotions, if your meditation object are your
             | senses (breath, feet in walking meditation, hands while
             | washing dishes) this seems to be a rather well-grounded
             | activity and not inherently dangerous (unless maybe you
             | have a serious psychological condition).
             | 
             | Proficient enough in Sati (mindfulness) and Samadhi
             | (concentration), the route could go to practicing samatha
             | and vipassana. Now my assumption would be that if you
             | directly overemphasize vipassana and your skills for
             | concentration, tranquility and equanimity aren't sufficient
             | to contain reactions when 'insight' hits you.
             | 
             | That being said, Vipassana covers a wide range of stuff.
             | Like "Body Scans" as done in Mindfulness based Stress
             | reduction (MBSR) are thought of IIRC as vipassana
             | practices, and IMHO they could just as well be thought of
             | as sati practice.
        
             | zozbot234 wrote:
             | I assume that's a reference to reaching awareness of the
             | three characteristics by "noting" perceptions and
             | sensations in the mind as if blasting enemies in a video
             | game. That's a very intense vipassana practice and while it
             | apparently makes for quick progress towards full awakening,
             | one could argue that it's not for everyone.
        
       | dayvid wrote:
       | Doing intensive meditation retreats is a Navy Seal hell-week for
       | your mind. If people took that into consideration, they would be
       | better prepared for the results.
       | 
       | It's much better to start with a simple meditation practice or go
       | on a shorter retreat (1-3 days), build up a base and periodically
       | dip your feet in deep waters. There are too many people in the
       | west who treat it like an extreme sport and get burned out in the
       | process.
       | 
       | It reminded me of when Tim Ferris decided to go on a 10-day
       | meditation retreat after a multi-day fast and almost had a full
       | mental breakdown.
        
         | spacemadness wrote:
         | I think some of that is the type A crowd being competitive
         | about their meditation practices. It's partly status seeking
         | whether they realize it or not. Coupled with a mental health
         | crisis I can see that being a terrible combination. Most people
         | aren't going to go on retreats or try to climb the
         | enlightenment ladder like this.
        
         | starkd wrote:
         | Never understood the need for meditation retreats. The only
         | purpose of gathering would be to meet and converse with other
         | people. Not to sit and listen to them breathe.
        
           | jelling wrote:
           | I suspect the primary driver for 1 - 2 week retreats is that
           | is the average Western vacation length and the mindful
           | companies are maximizing revenue relative to CAC.
           | 
           | Formal Buddhist training - such as to be a teacher within the
           | Kadampa tradition - can be done once a week over a course of
           | years. Other traditions training requires full-time reading
           | training over years.
           | 
           | I wouldn't recommend someone try to master an instrument in 7
           | - 14 days as learning takes time for integration and people
           | progress at different rates. So I'm skeptical of why anyone
           | would suggest that for attempting to master the mind.
        
             | starkd wrote:
             | I can think of better ways I would want to spend a
             | vacation.
        
           | dayvid wrote:
           | I think for a good deal of them you're in silence (no cell
           | phones or talking with others). It's really valuable to be in
           | silence if you haven't before. You can gain awareness of
           | random thoughts and things you don't notice when you're
           | surrounded by distractions. Doing it for too long or with no
           | stimulation (e.g. only sitting all day and meditating or
           | wandering off w/ no structure when you can maybe do some
           | activities in-between) can lead to strange things popping up.
        
             | starkd wrote:
             | I suppose there's some value in them for supplying some
             | kind of structure.
        
         | hilbertseries wrote:
         | Did anyone commenting read the article? The author was a
         | meditation teacher who had been meditating for over 10 years,
         | when he had this experience.
        
       | MauroIksem wrote:
       | There's a great podcast that explorers this issue when a guy goes
       | missing in india after he loses his mind much like this guy
        
       | notShabu wrote:
       | There's actually a whole subculture around hardcore spirituality
       | through Jed McKenna books.
       | 
       | Sample:
       | https://twitter.com/a_yawning_cat/status/1329310154630696960...
        
       | jdeaton wrote:
       | I used to compulsively meditate when I experienced anxiety, so
       | much so that my mind began associating meditation with anxiety.
       | The ironic effect was that meditation itself started to become
       | slightly anxiety inducing.
        
       | AlexCoventry wrote:
       | Contemporary mindfulness practices are a harmful corruption of
       | the original approach. A good book on the subject is _Right
       | Mindfulness: Memory & Ardency on the Buddhist Path_[1] by Ven.
       | Thanissaro.
       | 
       | > _For the past several decades, a growing flood of books,
       | articles, and teachings has advanced theories about the practice
       | of mindfulness which are highly questionable and--for anyone
       | hoping to realize the end of suffering--seriously misleading. The
       | main aim of this book is to show that the practice of mindfulness
       | is most fruitful when informed by the Buddha's own definition of
       | right mindfulness and his explanations of its role on the path._
       | 
       | [1]
       | https://www.dhammatalks.org/ebook_index.html#right_mindfulne...
        
       | crawfordcomeaux wrote:
       | A cultural addiction to dualism meeting a practice that opens one
       | up to what lies beyond the innate denial of dualism will
       | typically result in fear or pain. Setting expectations about what
       | one will or won't uncover when one digs into the unknown
       | subconscious is a recipe for all this.
        
       | ROTMetro wrote:
       | "All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit
       | quietly in a room alone" Pascal
        
       | marhee wrote:
       | > ...and began self-medicating with drugs and alcohol. Looking
       | back, it was also during this time period that I had my first
       | dissociative experiences, in which elements of my sense of self
       | became separated in a way that impaired my ability to function.
       | 
       | This was a couple of years before the "meltdown". While
       | meditation surely may have induced mental health issues, the
       | drugs and alcohol probably didn't help.
       | 
       | What stands out is that he had mental health issues and some
       | point that grew worse, sadly. It temporally correlated with
       | meditation but that doesn't mean it was predominantly caused by
       | it.
       | 
       | The meditation may have triggered things, sure, but my guess is
       | he likely would have had a meltdown also if he went all-in on
       | some other activity for 10 years.
       | 
       | After all, with multiple years (4, 6?) between the first
       | dissociative symptoms and the break down, you could also argue
       | that the mediation may even slowed or alleviated the effects of
       | the mental disorder until some threshold was hit.
        
       | CitizenKane wrote:
       | I'm an autistic person and it sounds like in some way this person
       | achieved exactly the point of certain forms of meditation like
       | this which is to open up awareness. And I think as many autistic
       | folks will tell you, being very aware is extremely difficult and
       | is mentally and physically taxing. If you aren't prepared for it
       | I could indeed see it being extremely disturbing. Being exposed
       | to all your inner workings and thoughts constantly is not for the
       | faint of heart.
       | 
       | That being said, I think mindfulness in western countries skips a
       | lot of Buddhist teachings, which are in large part designed to
       | help deal with this kind of experience. I highly suggest that
       | anyone that is going down this path seek out teachers that have
       | experience and can be of aid. There are pragmatic aspects of it
       | that go beyond meditation and in my opinion are just as important
       | if not more so.
       | 
       | And just to contextualize this, I'm a Buddhist. I live in
       | Thailand and it's something that is part of my normal life. As
       | such, it's rare the I'm meditating outside of a temple and I have
       | easy access to a whole host of teachers. I would urge caution
       | around retreats and other intensive practices. Mindset and
       | setting are extremely important and should be considered
       | carefully.
       | 
       | I've had a lifetime to learn to live like this and I would not
       | want to see anyone dropped in the deep end without proper
       | preparation.
        
         | starkd wrote:
         | So, could this meditation craze actually be making people
         | autistic?
        
           | CitizenKane wrote:
           | There are pretty strong overlaps in certain areas, but that
           | isn't the case though. Autism is caused by physical
           | neurological changes that have to do with brain development
           | before or near birth and while meditation (to my knowledge at
           | least) can alter overall brain structure it won't alter the
           | more fundamental structural changes which are seen in folks
           | with autism.
        
             | SuoDuanDao wrote:
             | Anecdotally, my father is probably autistic and doing
             | heart-focused meditation has made him much better able to
             | handle some of the side effects, particularly sensory
             | overload and social frustration. It might be a question of
             | some meditation being more 'cerebral' versus others that
             | are more 'grounding' interacting differently with a
             | tendency for something like autism.
        
         | coffeebeqn wrote:
         | How common is something like a retreat there for a median
         | Buddhist?
        
           | CitizenKane wrote:
           | I wouldn't say I'm the most knowledgeable in this regard but
           | as far as I know it's not super common. Buddhism in Thailand
           | is strongly tied to making merit[1] which is more or less
           | doing good deeds. And generally, this is seen as something to
           | be done regularly as a part of daily life as opposed to
           | taking a break out of normal life for it. That being said,
           | I'm sure there are still plenty of folks who do so, but at
           | least in my experience it was primarily non-Thai folks doing
           | so.
           | 
           | [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Merit_(Buddhism)
        
         | b800h wrote:
         | I came here to say the same thing, and you said it much more
         | charitably than I was going to. This is what you get when you
         | try to turn complex religious practice into multi-level
         | marketing, with certifications, and people being paid to
         | instruct.
        
         | sclarisse wrote:
         | Was going to post this. There are reasons we have brains with
         | selective attention instead of constant mindfulness, and a
         | whole spectrum of disorders that arises when that sort of a
         | filter breaks down. (I am lucky. I don't have it bad.)
         | Unfiltered mindfulness of this sort sounds like basically the
         | same thing.
        
           | kayodelycaon wrote:
           | Pretty much. I'm bipolar and every moment I need to have some
           | awareness of where my mood is and do course corrections to
           | head off episodes or emotional overreactions.
           | 
           | I quite literally can't trust how I feel from minute to
           | minute. Knowing my logical analysis of situations can also be
           | compromised causes me to run deeper mental self-tests several
           | times per day.
           | 
           | I'm used to this but it's a constant low-grade drain on my
           | attention.
           | 
           | Meditation is dangerous for me as it quickly leads to
           | dangerous psychosis. (Life is a video game and I can't really
           | die.)
        
             | [deleted]
        
       | cutler wrote:
       | I can't help thinking that most of these examples of negative
       | side effects are related to intensives rather than
       | meditation/mindfulness itself. There's a world of difference
       | between 20 minutes a day and 10 days in a retreat looking inward.
       | Maybe it's just better for you in short bursts, not long
       | marathons. I once experienced negative effects after joining a
       | Buddhist meditation group while at university. Every time I faced
       | anything which provoked anxiety, such as preparation for my final
       | exams, I would turn to meditation assuming it would help me get
       | things done but it had the opposite effect of avoiding what I
       | needed to face. I ended-up spending longer and longer periods
       | meditating but I felt I was getting weaker both physically and
       | neurologically. Eventually, during the end-of-term holiday break,
       | I consulted a doctor who gave me tranquillisers for a few weeks
       | and I left the Buddhist group when I returned to university but
       | it took a while to get back to normal.
       | 
       | These days I do 20 minutes a day of mind control which involves
       | nothing more than counting down from 9 to 1 repeatedly. No quest
       | for Enlightenment. Just a sense of calm I can depend on balanced
       | by facing stress and, most important, some kind of short-burst
       | physical activity such as 3 sets of full squats to bring me right
       | back into my body in no uncertain terms. Works wonders. It's all
       | about balance. 10-day mindfulness retreats full of 2-hour
       | sessions, in my view, are for zealots.
        
         | waboremo wrote:
         | Not entirely sure if any study demonstrating the benefits of
         | meditation or mindfulness considers counting 9 to 1 repeatedly
         | an act of either. That aligns much more closely with the advice
         | given to those with panic disorders in how to ride out their
         | panic attacks or prevent them when they feel coming on.
        
           | cyberbanjo wrote:
           | I'm not Buddhist or experienced meditator, but I have surely
           | seen instruction for counting based mindfulness practices.
           | 
           | https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ganana#Technique
        
             | zeknife wrote:
             | Rather, it is a concentration practice, and concentration
             | facilitates mindfulness
        
           | cal85 wrote:
           | The comment didn't claim it was an act of either, either.
        
             | waboremo wrote:
             | We're in a thread about mindfulness.
        
         | maxFlow wrote:
         | > These days I do 20 minutes a day of mind control which
         | involves nothing more than counting down from 9 to 1
         | repeatedly.
         | 
         | If it works for you that's great. However, I would say
         | approaching meditation from a "mind control" exercise such as
         | "counting down from 9 to 1 repeatedly" goes counter to its
         | purpose and will hinder its full potential. If you're willing
         | to experiment with other methods, try letting your mind wander
         | and don't let it stick; just experience the ebb and flow.
         | Twenty-minute sessions sound about right for me as well.
        
           | rdevsrex wrote:
           | User name checks out.
        
         | naasking wrote:
         | > Maybe it's just better for you in short bursts, not long
         | marathons.
         | 
         | Actual marathons aren't great for your body either, especially
         | if it's not something you've diligently trained for properly,
         | so that makes sense.
        
         | jossclimb wrote:
         | I expect there will be higher cases of psychosis happening on
         | intense retreats, but as anecdotal as this, I had it happen to
         | me (albeit not as extreme as OP) after meditating for much
         | shorter periods (approx 10 minutes up to an hour).
         | 
         | I really did not see it coming. For some context, I don't know
         | of any deep seated trauma that I have and I liked to think of
         | myself as someone robust mentally.
         | 
         | I experienced a deep realisation that our thoughts manifest
         | from nowhere and not from ourselves (words fail me here) and
         | that the construct of 'me' was completely false and was just a
         | reverberation of my environment. I understood there was no me.
         | This was really nice for about two weeks. I started to think
         | that I should be looking to help other people and become a
         | guru, perhaps write a book to help humanity, but then my ego (I
         | expect) came back with a vengeance, kicked my ass and brought
         | me back down to earth with a crash (maybe its a safety system).
         | I experienced huge panic attacks like I have never had before,
         | I carried this constant feeling of absolute dread in my soul,
         | like a sense of impending doom. I have heard it described as
         | the dark night of the soul. Some try to push through this, but
         | I held back as i cannot afford to have a complete meltdown as I
         | need to care for a young family and hold down a job.
         | 
         | I spoke with a well respected meditator about this, and they
         | said the some people are wired to have an accelerated
         | experience and are able to obtain deep introspection with
         | limited time on the cushion.
         | 
         | I would say I am almost back to normal now. I had to stop all
         | meditation and instead focused on health food, sleep habits and
         | lots of exercise. My main mediation type thing is now running,
         | it quietens my mind, but the grounding effect of the movement
         | keeps me in a safe play pen to explore my reality.
         | 
         | meditation is incredibly powerful, in the west we have confused
         | it as being a corporate stress ball that you squeeze or like a
         | lavender scented, candle lit bath while listening to Enya. The
         | truth is, it can reveal incredibly deep seated aspects of
         | ourselves that we are in no way prepared to witness, let alone
         | accept.
        
           | kodah wrote:
           | > I experienced a deep realisation that our thoughts manifest
           | from nowhere and not from ourselves (words fail me here) and
           | that the construct of 'me' was completely false and was just
           | a reverberation of my environment. I understood there was no
           | me.
           | 
           | If you were tripping this is called ego death. In some
           | circles, including mine, what you described after:
           | 
           | > I started to think that I should be looking to help other
           | people and become a guru, perhaps write a book to help
           | humanity, but then my ego (I expect) came back with a
           | vengeance, kicked my ass and brought me back down to earth
           | with a crash (maybe its a safety system).
           | 
           | Can be common. When I experienced ego death I was aware that
           | it would return so I was able to deal with it. I think of it
           | kind of like the trip itself; the more you fight it the
           | harder it fights you.
           | 
           | Not sure this helps as it's entirely my own experience and
           | was drug induced, but I do think occasional ego death is
           | worth it. Just be cognizant of what you're doing. The mind is
           | a powerful place.
        
             | davedx wrote:
             | "The little death that brings total obliteration".
        
             | zozbot234 wrote:
             | And this is exactly why "tripping" is heavily frowned upon
             | by serious meditators and spiritual practitioners.
             | Experiencing "ego death" (i.e. the three marks of
             | existence) without having the previous spiritual grounding
             | for it to help free you from attachment to the ego, is only
             | a recipe for being even more deeply mired in craving and
             | dukkha.
        
               | jcbrand wrote:
               | > And this is exactly why "tripping" is heavily frowned
               | upon by serious meditators and spiritual practitioners.
               | 
               | This is needlessly judgmental. I know life-long
               | meditators, 30+ of years disciplined practice who
               | sometimes take psychedelics.
               | 
               | I'm not a fan of various aspects of the psychedelic
               | scene, e.g. the spiritual bypassing and the narcissism
               | that can sometimes come from it, but let's not throw the
               | baby out with the bathwater.
               | 
               | Usage of psychedelics can be profoundly healing and
               | helpful.
        
               | zozbot234 wrote:
               | > I know life-long meditators, 30+ of years disciplined
               | practice who sometimes take psychedelics.
               | 
               | I'm not dismissing spiritual practice, but psychedelics
               | are entirely incidental to it and can be a snare for the
               | unprepared mind. What's "profoundly healing and helpful"
               | is always the spiritual part, not the means used to
               | achieve it.
        
               | TheOtherHobbes wrote:
               | And yet "spiritual" people are at least as prone to
               | narcissism as everyone else. IMO one of the reasons
               | spirituality of all kinds - including both traditional
               | and non-traditional religion - has remained so
               | consistently popular that it provides such excellent
               | cover for more base actions and desires.
               | 
               | If you've found a drama-free spiritual community where
               | everyone is deeply chilled and yet also adult and
               | effective without losing a sense of humour, please let me
               | know. That really hasn't been my experience.
               | 
               | In fact I think mindfulness, meditation, and so on
               | confuse a kind of metaphysics of morality with what is
               | probably some fairly basic brain mode switching.
               | 
               | Being "enlightened" for a brief period does not seem to
               | create good people with any consistency or reliability.
               | It doesn't even create consistently happier people.
               | (Sometimes? Yes. More reliably and safely than other
               | activities? Very likely not.)
               | 
               | It does seem to remove certain existential tangles,
               | sometimes. But rather than being about "ego" - boo, hiss
               | - perhaps those are more to do with easy/default vs less
               | accessible modes of emotional cognition.
               | 
               | And actually - that's all.
        
               | kodah wrote:
               | Those probably aren't meditators I would be listening to,
               | it sounds as unhealthy as the person that attaches their
               | identity to their ego return.
               | 
               | Psychedelics are a tool, and the different doses you
               | figure out are ways of using that tool. Ego death
               | requires a fairly heroic dose, something on the order of
               | 3-5 grams of mushrooms for most strains. This, to me, is
               | comparable to the isolation and introspection without
               | breaks to incur ego death in meditation.
               | 
               | Ego death, from my perspective, is also a tool. Done with
               | knowledge of what will happen during and after let's the
               | user experience the absence of ego and helps them live
               | with their ego when it returns. Done without the
               | knowledge of what will happen after, humans often fully
               | embrace that ego as a new life based on wisdom. A false
               | wisdom.
               | 
               | My point here is the medium in which you choose is
               | largely irrelevant. How you use the tools and the
               | knowledge you go into them with are the paramount pieces.
               | It's honestly surprising to me that anyone who meditates
               | would have such judgy and pithy opinions, but it's a big
               | world out there.
        
               | zozbot234 wrote:
               | > Psychedelics are a tool
               | 
               | I don't think most users of psychedelics view them as a
               | "tool" for serious spiritual practice. They just think
               | tripping is a lot of fun.
        
               | kodah wrote:
               | That's an incredibly cynical take and possibly bordering
               | on gatekeeping based on "spiritual" boundaries.
               | 
               | Psychedelics can be fun, but in my experience they're fun
               | if your mind is in the right place. They act as a conduit
               | for more deeply connecting with the world around you.
               | 
               | On the other hand, if you have work to do then those
               | things have a chance to appear in your trip. That can be
               | healthy, if you're ready to face something, or it can be
               | incredibly terrifying. I've had both experiences through
               | my own isolation and meditation before. As someone with
               | years of trauma, including a year long stint in a war
               | zone, I can attest that my trips were sometimes fun,
               | almost always challenging, and sometimes terrifying. As
               | time has gone on and I've done work to unpack my trips
               | and connect them with my experiences and understanding
               | when I'm sober my trips have averaged to being "more fun"
               | and "connected". This is something I was not able to
               | achieve with meditation alone.
        
               | zozbot234 wrote:
               | > That can be healthy, if you're ready to face something,
               | or it can be incredibly terrifying.
               | 
               | Yes, and there's no guarantee that your bad trip or
               | encounter with these entities will resolve itself without
               | major effort. That ought to be enough to be seriously
               | concerned about whether it is in any way appropriate to
               | endorse this as some sort of ordinary, routine practice
               | for the uninitiated.
        
               | kodah wrote:
               | This can be easily said about spirituality as well.
               | Anecdotally, I've met far more people with higher density
               | narcissistic traits who cover their behavior with
               | beliefs, enlightenment, and morality than I have of those
               | with trippers. Unlike you, I don't think spirituality is
               | a poison pill as a result. Instead I think of it as
               | something that must be constantly measured, dosed, and
               | negotiated with depending on the outcomes for a
               | particular person. This is similar to how I think of
               | psychedelics.
        
               | bigbluedots wrote:
               | I'm finding it fascinating how much dogmatic religious
               | junk is being thrown around in the comments here -
               | discussing an article where one of the author's central
               | points is that none of the dogmatic religious junk helped
               | him.
        
               | zozbot234 wrote:
               | A tradition of meditation and spiritual practices with a
               | history encompassing more than two thousand years is the
               | polar opposite from "dogmatic religious junk"; it's
               | filled with observations derived from experience. The
               | Westernized use of psychedelics is barely a few decades
               | old. I think it's reasonably clear what we should choose
               | if we are to remain humble and avoid dogmaticism.
        
           | wafflemaker wrote:
           | So there is this pattern of light spiritual practice (ok, not
           | in your case, here light was the heavy) being safe and chill,
           | And of heavy spiritual practice having the potential to be
           | dangerous.
           | 
           | I see an analogy to using psychedelics as described in this
           | lecture fragment (starts around 12th minute)
           | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j72C_lDHTk0 Ram Dass on "When
           | is it right to use psychedealics?"
           | 
           | There he talks about two types of psychedelic usage.
           | Recreational - here we don't need to prepare, we should use
           | little of the substance and can enjoy f.ex. our favorite
           | music sounding a little better. Transformational - here, we
           | have to prepare thoroughly studying spiritual/philosophical
           | books, have a proper fast before the experience and have a
           | proper guide. This way the potential for a difficult
           | experience lessens and the potential for transformative
           | experience grows.
           | 
           | Interestingly, the lecture excerpt starts with description of
           | ancient/historical use of psychedelics, where they were used
           | in rituals aimed at transformation of the subject. Subject
           | attended the ritual being thoroughly prepared, something
           | completely different than being offered psylocibin
           | mushrooms/acid on a party. I wonder if this advice (going
           | light doesn't require preparation, going heavy requires
           | preparing as much as possible trough fasting and study) could
           | also apply here, to meditation practice.
           | 
           | Sorry if this idea/lecture was posted here already, had only
           | limited time to read and reply in this thread.
        
           | DontchaKnowit wrote:
           | Interestingly you describe the shattering of your delusion as
           | the return of your ego - I think it is the opposite. I think
           | you invited an inflated ego into your life through your
           | meditation : "I should become a guru and help humanity" <--
           | that is ego speaking. The shattering of this idea is is not
           | ego but humility, to my way of thinking.
        
             | 2-718-281-828 wrote:
             | you have a point
        
               | realce wrote:
               | It's also just a mind that might be desperate for a core
               | identity after having its last one logically dissolved
               | through introspection.
               | 
               | While ego can hijack identity for it's own mad desires,
               | an identity is required for the actuation of relational
               | actions on a basic level. With no "center" from which to
               | make decisions, the functions of your mind tasked with
               | making choices will panic - this is a foundation of
               | brainwashing/psychological manipulation. Very similar
               | things happen to people who have a TBI, where they become
               | stressed when forced to make choices that seem to have
               | zero baring on "their" lives.
               | 
               | So dissolved identity > Panic attacks when choice-
               | satisfaction plummets > subconscious suggests all kinds
               | of cartoonist extremes for an easy and powerful identity
               | > Conscious mind agrees to play along, uses this
               | character to make decisions about > Choice-satisfaction
               | rises.
        
               | flycaliguy wrote:
               | Can you elaborate on your comment regarding TBI? I'm, uh,
               | asking for a friend.
        
               | realce wrote:
               | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoiZs7QpDUY
               | 
               | I remember a clip I'd seen where a veteran with a TBI
               | would break down when shopping, since there's so many
               | choices that are focused at appealing to personality
               | rather than utility, and his notion of his own
               | personality was minimal.
        
               | Eupraxias wrote:
               | "So dissolved identity > Panic attacks when choice-
               | satisfaction plummets > subconscious suggests all kinds
               | of cartoonist extremes for an easy and powerful identity
               | > Conscious mind agrees to play along, uses this
               | character to make decisions about > Choice-satisfaction
               | rises. "
               | 
               | I'm sure it's different for most others, but I had the
               | opposite experience. It has introduced a great calm into
               | my life.
               | 
               | From where I am now, I see identity as the central
               | problem we face as a species.
        
               | zozbot234 wrote:
               | > From where I am now, I see identity as the central
               | problem we face as a species.
               | 
               | Yeah, except that in practice awareness of no-self is
               | very far from an ethical cure-it-all. There's plenty of
               | supposedly "enlightened" folks in a variety of spiritual
               | traditions who routinely engage in morally sub-standard
               | behavior, despite having reached that awareness
               | themselves and teaching it to others. We know for a fact
               | that many spiritual traditions view correct ethics and
               | behavior as paramount, and as the hardest part of their
               | training.
        
             | mettamage wrote:
             | Favorited, I'm on a quest to be egoless as I'm finding the
             | ego to be an issue in my day to day. It's hard to pinpoint
             | the ego, but you did so wonderfully :)
        
               | rattlesnakedave wrote:
               | you need some ego. otherwise you won't know where to
               | point your fork to eat.
        
               | nick__m wrote:
               | you reminded me of some John lenon comment on ego death :
               | I got the message that I should destroy my ego and I did,
               | you know. I was reading that stupid book of Leary's; we
               | were going through a whole game that everybody went
               | through, and I destroyed myself. I was slowly putting
               | myself together round about Maharishi time. Bit by bit
               | over a two-year period, I had destroyed me ego.
               | I didn't believe I could do anything and let people make
               | me, and let them all just do what they wanted. I just was
               | nothing. I was shit. Then Derek tripped me out at his
               | house after he got back from L.A. He sort of said "You're
               | all right," and pointed out which songs I had written.
               | "You wrote this," and "You said this" and "You are
               | intelligent, don't be frightened."
               | 
               | -- https://www.johnlennon.com/music/interviews/rolling-
               | stone-in...
        
             | astrange wrote:
             | That's very similar to the boddhisatva vow many Buddhists
             | are required to take.
        
             | JamesBarney wrote:
             | Meditation and psychology have a specific term for ego,
             | like when referring to ego death. And it doesn't quite mean
             | the same thing as ego in common usage. It usually means a
             | break down of sense of self, this can happen on
             | psychedelics or in schizophrenia. This can also be
             | accompanied with delusions of grandeur, they're not
             | mutually exclusive.
        
               | DontchaKnowit wrote:
               | Delusions of granduer is basically an inflated sense of
               | self - e.g. an inflated ego. Whether using the common
               | parlance or the jungian definition, its the same thing in
               | this context.
               | 
               | Always tough to discuss slippery, ill defined things such
               | as ego, which in a real sense does not actually exist.
        
             | electrondood wrote:
             | You get it.
             | 
             | These adverse experiences are the ego's last-ditch effort
             | to maintain cohesion. It's the same with psychedelics. If
             | you let go in the face of the terror and accept, the terror
             | becomes utter bliss.
             | 
             | In response to these experiences, ask "Who exactly are they
             | happening to?"
        
             | jossclimb wrote:
             | I was more humouring the situation there and adding some
             | color, but for sure, the ego is incredibly powerful and
             | deep seated. I firmly believe what I had initially was
             | profound, and was hijacked by the ego (and this is a very
             | common happening to anyone on a spiritual journey of some
             | sort).
        
               | mtalantikite wrote:
               | The best book I've read on this topic is Chogyam
               | Trungpa's "Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism" [1].
               | He's very clear in pointing out how ego tries to get
               | involved in everything.
               | 
               | It sounds like you may have had an experience, to some
               | extent, of dwelling in the union of wisdom and emptiness
               | or what some call dharmadhatu [2]. It's not a teaching I
               | encountered until I started practicing Vajrayana, as
               | Theravada teachers don't often emphasize the teachings on
               | sunyata. It's something you'll encounter in Mahamudra and
               | Dzogchen teachings.
               | 
               | [1] https://www.shambhala.com/cutting-through-spiritual-
               | material...
               | 
               | [2] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dharmadhatu
        
               | zozbot234 wrote:
               | > ... the union of wisdom and emptiness ...
               | 
               | Ah, the extent that some people will go through to avoid
               | acknowledging God. It's like some people take stubborn
               | pleasure in being purposely nihilistic and strenuously
               | denying all that's good about the world. How this can be
               | part of a supposedly spiritual practice, I just can't
               | understand.
        
               | mtalantikite wrote:
               | It's quite common to first encounter the teachings on
               | emptiness (sunyata) and be confused into thinking it's
               | about nihilism. However, nihilism is considered one of
               | the two extreme views that leads to suffering in Buddhism
               | -- the other being eternalism -- and both are explicitly
               | argued against. Thich Nhat Hanh has a great book that
               | helps clarify the teachings on sunyata [1].
               | 
               | I also would point out that if anything Buddhism is life-
               | affirming and immensely hopeful, not denying what's good
               | in the world. It teaches that there's a way out of
               | suffering right here and right now, and it's available to
               | every being without exclusion. The fourth noble truth is
               | the spiritual practice to make that happen. Every
               | meditation session in Mahayana and Vajrayana lineages
               | have the common preliminaries, which includes love and
               | compassion for all beings.
               | 
               | [1] https://plumvillage.org/books/the-other-shore/
        
               | cybervaz wrote:
               | They think they are on a journey yo self enlightenment
               | when they're actually in a very dangerous road to
               | spiritual weakness, causing damage to their souls and
               | leaving gaps to be used by entities that they'll not feel
               | any pleasure of knowing.
               | 
               | That sense of impeding doom is nothing more than those
               | spiritual entities oppressing with overwhelming power
               | them by those gaps.
               | 
               | We are locked out of that world for a reason. The safe
               | means to get unlocked is by getting your soul to borrow
               | the power of God and slowly expose yourself to such
               | world. Other than that, self enlightenment is just
               | wishful thinking of empty vessels.
        
               | DontchaKnowit wrote:
               | Word. The more I explore the the world of occult
               | practices throughout history the more I am convinced that
               | it is always an excercise in self destruction.
               | 
               | Our intentions, understanding, morality, sense of self,
               | sense of direction, is so frail. A man who believes he
               | can manufacture these things for himself (which is, in my
               | opinion, wfundamentally what occultists are doing) is
               | doomed to spiritual sufferring.
        
               | akomtu wrote:
               | The original term behind "emptiness" is a lot richer than
               | this english word. That's why many books leave those
               | words as is, e.g. rig-pa.
               | 
               | "Emptiness" of your mind means something like a thin soap
               | bubble around you. This bubble acts as a lens, it can
               | enlarge arbitrary things, it can create stable patterns
               | on its surface, and all that is useful, but it blocks
               | whatever is outside the bubble. In its natural state it
               | would be a perfect invisible sphere, letting you see
               | outside: this union of clarity and emptiness creates
               | wisdom. You are still going to use this bubble as a
               | whiteboard for your thoughts, but you'll also know how to
               | see thru it.
               | 
               | The concept of emptiness applies to material world in
               | general: the western science calls it space-time, the
               | idea that any thing can turn into any other thing, for
               | both are fundamentally just motions of energy that has no
               | natural shape. Buddhism tries to teach this basic idea in
               | different terms.
               | 
               | For some reason that I don't quite understand, the
               | founders of the three religions had fragmented the truth:
               | buddhism teaches wisdom, christianity teaches love and
               | islam teaches action - the three aspects of the spirit.
               | Perhaps they thought that mixing everything into one bag
               | would be too difficult to grasp, or maybe they hope it
               | will make the peoples collaborate to assemble the pieces.
        
               | elbear wrote:
               | Buddhism also teaches love. The Heart Practices are an
               | example.
        
           | AnonCoward42 wrote:
           | > I wasn't born Richard Alpert. I was just born as a human
           | being and then I learned this whole business of who I am,
           | whether I'm good or bad, achieving or not - all that's
           | learned along the way. And you see all those learn things
           | separate, so you start to have this dissociative experience,
           | where all that can become is a point of awareness. I remember
           | the first time this happened to me, I got a terrible panic,
           | because indeed I was gonna cease to exist.
           | 
           | -- Richard Alpert aka Ram Dass
           | 
           | I hope it's transcribed correctly.
        
             | quijoteuniv wrote:
             | But you are anoncoward42?
        
           | tuyiown wrote:
           | > I experienced a deep realisation that our thoughts manifest
           | from nowhere and not from ourselves (words fail me here) and
           | that the construct of 'me' was completely false and was just
           | a reverberation of my environment. I understood there was no
           | me. This was really nice for about two weeks and then my ego
           | (I expect) just kicked my arse and brought me back down to
           | earth with a crash (maybe its a safety system)
           | 
           | Just for the conversation: the <<from nowhere>> really just
           | might be the unconscious brain, as the relationship between
           | conscious and unconscious is ambiguous at best. The conscious
           | insist in being in control, most of the time fooling itself,
           | while the unconscious does most of the work in a really
           | autonomous way.
           | 
           | Maybe the <<safety system>> was just the unconscious
           | rebelling to prove it does indeed exist and that the
           | conscious should take note, and resume its part in the
           | general guidance of the being :)
        
             | haswell wrote:
             | > * the <<from nowhere>> really just might be the
             | unconscious brain*
             | 
             | The trouble is that once you start to consider the nature
             | of the unconscious brain, such consideration leads to the
             | same conclusion.
             | 
             | If the unconscious brain somehow has "control", from where
             | does it derive this control? Unless you then accept some
             | kind of metaphysical explanation, it's centerlessness all
             | the way down.
        
               | im3w1l wrote:
               | Well I would say it like this. The ancient part and the
               | modern part of the brain are in a sort of dialogue. The
               | ancient part can place a thought into the modern part of
               | the brain, like a sort of notification. The modern part
               | can then decide to pay attention to this or decide not
               | to. It can reason about it. And finally it can say
               | something back to the ancient part of the brain. It can
               | communicate some plan that the ancient part executes.
               | 
               | I say ancient/modern rather than unconsious/conscious,
               | because to a certain extent even the reasoning "just
               | happens", so you might be tempted to say that even the
               | reasoning is unconscious and it's actually all
               | unconscious except some supernatural me that is just
               | passively watching everything without actually taking any
               | action. But we can bypass that (quite interesting)
               | subject, by talking about ancient / modern, because the
               | reasoning part is separate and more modern.
               | 
               | Tldr: The neocortex is the homunculus (in the sense of
               | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homunculus_argument).
        
               | haswell wrote:
               | That is an interesting way to categorize those functions
               | of the brain, but philosophically, doesn't this leave us
               | in the same place? Whether you classify it as
               | ancient/modern, or subconscious/conscious, we're still
               | talking about two modes.
               | 
               | In one of these modes we actively perceive/experience our
               | concept of reality, and the other acts as a black box -
               | not available for direct interrogation, but still
               | possible to reason about via observations in conscious
               | experience.
               | 
               | The issue I'm having with this take is that our
               | definition of reasoning still depends on the black box.
               | The experience of feeling like a being capable of
               | reasoning and then using that ability to consider a
               | problem is all built on a foundation of thoughts,
               | sensations and feelings that just "appear" in conscious
               | experience with very little evidence that the conscious
               | mind had anything to do with putting them there.
        
               | kfajdsl wrote:
               | Is being centerless really such a bad thing?
               | 
               | Then again, I really haven't experienced the concept at a
               | fundamental, spiritual level, only intellectually; I
               | don't really meditate. Maybe there's something deep in
               | our wiring (probably in our unconscious mind, which
               | really pulls most of the strings) that has difficulty
               | grappling with the loss of the idea of "self".
        
               | haswell wrote:
               | I don't believe it's a bad thing at all, it just _is_.
               | 
               | And glimpsing centerlessness for yourself sounds
               | disconcerting, but instead seems paradoxically comforting
               | when it happens.
               | 
               | For me personally, it brought with it a deep sense of
               | peace and wonder about my existence and coexistence with
               | a world full of similarly centerless beings.
               | 
               | To your point about wiring, I think absolutely yes. From
               | an evolutionary psychology perspective, many aspects of
               | conscious experience ensure we stay alive and procreate,
               | but are not necessarily _pleasant_ and seem to be
               | increasingly incompatible with modern life.
               | 
               | Robert Wright's book "Why Buddhism is True" explores this
               | at length and is a really interesting read. It's not a
               | book about religious truth, but one that maps a modern
               | understanding of evolutionary psychology onto the
               | insights of Buddhist philosophy and how such philosophy
               | can be incredibly helpful when dealing with the
               | implications of living in a body that did not evolve to
               | survive the conditions to which it is currently subject.
        
               | tuyiown wrote:
               | > it's centerlessness all the way down
               | 
               | Well I didn't meant anything else actually. I realize
               | that the <<unconscious>> term is tainted, as it can
               | represent something like a hidden part of personality,
               | especially on Freudian literature and likes.
               | 
               | I didn't meant that, I was thinking of the sum of the
               | autonomous processing and coordination of the numerous
               | intricate and distributed functions of the brain, senses,
               | motor, emotional, etc...
        
               | haswell wrote:
               | That's a good clarification clarification. I misread the
               | quoted part as trying to shift the "well" of
               | consciousness to the unconscious brain, which really just
               | moves the problem down one level.
        
           | janeerie wrote:
           | A couple of years ago, I started a light meditation practice
           | (10-20 minutes) and did it for about a month with good
           | results. At that point, I read this article (on Hacker News)
           | and spent the next two years terrified this would happen to
           | me.
           | 
           | I had struggled with panic disorder in the past, but CBT
           | pretty much fixed it for me. This article triggered my first
           | panic attacks in years and led to a constant sense of dread
           | and anxiety. It was so terrifying to think that a simple
           | mental process could potentially trigger a breakdown (and
           | like you, I had a family to take care of).
           | 
           | Fast-forward a couple of years, and I'm moving towards the
           | view that these breakdowns are simple anxiety disorders that
           | just happen to be triggered by meditation, in the same way
           | that a panic attack triggered my anxiety disorder when I was
           | young. I don't think there's anything particularly special or
           | mystical about it - it's just our stupid brains activating
           | the fear response, and it appears that the same methods for
           | dealing with anxiety disorders work here.
           | 
           | I feel like in a way I was the control group for an
           | experiment - can a fear of meditation provoke the same
           | response as meditation itself?
        
             | pushrax wrote:
             | https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6612475/ is a
             | review of Britton's research discussed in the article. It
             | presents several points of evidence with a coherent
             | argument for why meditation brings benefits while an
             | excessive level of meditation may cause adverse effects.
        
               | ok_dad wrote:
               | It's interesting that anyone even had to specify that
               | excessive meditation could cause harm. Isn't the whole
               | point of Buddhism to follow the "middle way"?
        
             | zozbot234 wrote:
             | > This article triggered my first panic attacks in years
             | and led to a constant sense of dread and anxiety.
             | 
             | Perhaps you should think of your dread and anxiety as a
             | symptom of craving. But if you think your family
             | obligations get in the way, there's nothing wrong with
             | avoiding deep insight practices for now. You can do light
             | meditation and even take an intellectual interest in the
             | deeper teachings without seriously triggering anything.
        
               | robocat wrote:
               | > You can do light meditation and even take an
               | intellectual interest in the deeper teachings without
               | seriously triggering anything.
               | 
               | Our fears can dominate our reality, and you are tritely
               | recommending a possibly harmful path without knowing
               | anything about them . . . like recommending eating a
               | peanut to someone who knows they have a dangerous
               | allergic reaction to peanuts. In the context of the
               | article, your advice is especially egregious.
               | 
               | Please tread carefully in the world, effortless advice
               | can cause long term harm.
               | 
               | Sometimes it is good to listen to our fears, sometimes
               | not. Hard to judge others across the vast distance of a
               | few sentences.
        
               | zozbot234 wrote:
               | Of course. There is a world of difference between
               | understanding something on an intellectual level and
               | engaging in serious insight practice. Unlike insight
               | meditation itself, there isn't really any evidence that
               | the path I suggested is "possibly harmful".
        
           | dsubburam wrote:
           | > I experienced a deep realisation that our thoughts manifest
           | from nowhere and not from ourselves (words fail me here) and
           | that the construct of 'me' was completely false and was just
           | a reverberation of my environment. I understood there was no
           | me.
           | 
           | A way to frame such an experience (a version of which I've
           | had too) is to say that we realize that the purpose we've
           | been having for our striving is bogus. e.g. There's no
           | special "me" that's important to make look good, that needs
           | respect and fame etc.
           | 
           | But that doesn't mean we lose all striving. We just find a
           | new, more wholesome, purpose for it.
           | 
           | I think Eckhart Tolle talks about this. There are other
           | perspectives, too, that one can garner by reading philosophy.
           | (e.g. Aristotle's Nicomachean Ethics, which puts virtue as
           | most worth striving for; there're also much simpler takes on
           | what's worth striving for in an ego-less sense, which are
           | paradoxically harder to intellectually grok while being much
           | more commonly espoused in practice, such as love for home,
           | and family).
        
           | jvanderbot wrote:
           | The stories we tell ourselves matter. Staring into the mind
           | and seeing nothing is a powerful and frightening story. There
           | may be a more positive reframing, but it's also not a
           | mandatory story to tell yourself.
        
           | cutler wrote:
           | "Before enlightenment chop wood, carry water. After
           | enlightenment chop wood, carry water." We need the mundane
           | earthly activities to balance any inward quests.
        
             | hrnnnnnn wrote:
             | Or the contemporary version: after enlightenment, the
             | dishes.
        
             | Southworth wrote:
             | One of my most treasured quotes. Glad to see it here.
        
             | jossclimb wrote:
             | totally agree.
        
             | Cthulhu_ wrote:
             | That sounds pragmatic; in the end, you still have to return
             | to the real world and get on with things like survive.
             | 
             | Although this talk about becoming enlightened sounds like
             | people have given up on themselves and realilty entirely to
             | pursue something in their minds. It sounds like a self-
             | induced state of tripping balls.
        
               | robertlagrant wrote:
               | Cthulhu discussion Buddhism. Am _I_ tripping?
        
             | yamtaddle wrote:
             | I've always taken it to (also) mean that one ought not
             | expect _rebirth_ in enlightenment, or some instant
             | transformation of one 's condition and even of one's
             | spiritual (if you will) practice. It's not like graduating
             | from school and moving into the workforce, where you stop
             | going to classes and your life shifts radically in a short
             | span. One day you're not enlightened, the next you are,
             | and... that's the whole thing, congrats, you did it, now
             | life goes on surprisingly-similarly to how it did before.
             | 
             | "Oh, you're enlightened? That's nice. Now, on with what we
             | were doing...."
        
           | hosh wrote:
           | That's the No Self realization. I only had a brief glimpse of
           | it, including the weirdly simultaneous panic. It did not
           | happen during a meditation session, and it was brief.
           | 
           | I remember a podcast interview with Adyashanti about this. A
           | lot of people experience unity consciousness first before no
           | self, but some people experience no self first. He mentioned
           | about someone he knows who experienced that, and had it for
           | years, while also having to care for a child.
           | 
           | On reddit, I read someone stating that psychedelic can break
           | someone, and it happened to him. Lots of people responded by
           | saying things, and he was telling them, no, literally, there
           | was something that broke and there's no coming back from it.
        
           | analyst74 wrote:
           | > I experienced a deep realisation that our thoughts manifest
           | from nowhere and not from ourselves (words fail me here) and
           | that the construct of 'me' was completely false and was just
           | a reverberation of my environment.
           | 
           | Wait, is this not common knowledge??
        
             | yyyk wrote:
             | It's a common _argument_ , which may or may not be true if
             | it can be properly defined at all.
        
             | haswell wrote:
             | Knowledge is not the same thing as insight, and
             | _experiencing_ what the parent comment describes is
             | something that most people never attempt (or even realize
             | there is something to attempt).
             | 
             | Having a philosophical/intellectual conversation about the
             | nature of mind is very different than your own mind
             | wrapping itself around these concepts directly.
        
         | ystad wrote:
         | To add on. I think the key is probably to have a balance. Your
         | life, work, sport, medity
        
         | rrrrrrrrrrrryan wrote:
         | Meditation is a dose-dependent drug.
         | 
         | Most people will reap most of the health benefits that
         | meditation has to offer by sitting for 20 minutes a couple
         | times a day.
         | 
         | You can go much deeper, of course, but that's a philosophical /
         | spiritual quest to gain a deeper understanding of yourself and
         | the world around you - it's not a health pursuit. A multi-day
         | meditation retreat is in many ways like running an
         | ultramarathon: it's not really a _healthy_ undertaking, per se,
         | but you might learn something about yourself by doing it, and
         | the way to do it responsibly is by working your way up to it
         | over months and years of practice.
        
         | adamsmith143 wrote:
         | I think stories like this relate to misunderstanding the point
         | of meditation practice, the practice. The time spent may be
         | helpful in of itself but really you're meant to do the practice
         | and learn more about how your mind works and be able to have
         | better control of your emotional states. Not retreat into
         | meditating whenever you fell something other than contentment.
         | Disappointing that you apparently didn't learn this from a
         | Buddhist group and instead focused on the actual act of
         | meditating as the useful thing.
        
           | starkd wrote:
           | I think the ones that "go deeper" are doing so because they
           | don't know what else to do, what the next step is. But they
           | have achieved some "success", so they keep doing it. It also
           | feeds the rise of new gurus that think they are helping by
           | spreading the message, but they are merely feeding a new ego.
           | There are so many teachers and online gurus hoping to turn it
           | into a vocation.
        
         | SeattleAltruist wrote:
         | Yes. Moderation in all things.
        
         | yamtaddle wrote:
         | > I would turn to meditation assuming it would help me get
         | things done but it had the opposite effect of avoiding what I
         | needed to face.
         | 
         | Marcus Aurelius--quoted from memory, so probably not quite
         | right, and it's in translation at any rate:
         | 
         | > You can pass your life in a calm flow of happiness, if you
         | learn to think the right way and to act the right way.
         | 
         | I personally found the "think the right way" easy to get into,
         | but without the "act the right way" it can indeed lead to
         | apathy, detachment, and avoidance. Whoops.
        
         | ycombinete wrote:
         | There are often first-hand comments about the dangers of
         | mindfulness practice here on HN. But when the commenters
         | describe their practices they are so extreme that it was almost
         | inevitable that they had negative effects.
        
           | coffeebeqn wrote:
           | There's quite a spectrum between a 10-20min almost daily
           | habit and trying to actually reach "enlightenment". These 10
           | day silent retreats are a lot closer to the Bodhidharma
           | sitting in a cave end of the spectrum. Probably not the first
           | people to go a little crazy attempting that in Buddhist
           | history. Given the context I would imagine it's mostly
           | overachievers but that is not really a healthy approach to
           | religion or mental health (going hard as a mf)
        
             | ycombinete wrote:
             | > Probably not the first people to go a little crazy
             | attempting that in Buddhist history
             | 
             | During the signup process for a 10 day Vipassana retreat,
             | they ask for a lot of details about your psychological
             | health. Even warning against doing the retreat if you're
             | not in a good mental place. So I'm sure you're right.
        
           | threatofrain wrote:
           | It also makes me wonder whether it's unusual people who
           | select themselves into such extreme activities, and not that
           | meditation is dangerous.
        
         | Mistletoe wrote:
         | Haven't we all looked inwardly too much already? I'd list that
         | as a top reason for the general malaise I see around me. I've
         | never really found looking inward that useful, looking outward
         | and acting outward and thinking about others has to be a 100:1
         | ratio on returns vs looking inward.
        
           | haswell wrote:
           | What is too much, and why would such introspection be a bad
           | thing if it consistently leads to improved mental states? But
           | I think more importantly, "looking inward" is not really the
           | primary focus, but a technique to help one realize what is
           | (and is not) already there.
           | 
           | At one time I think I would have written a comment similar to
           | yours, because I had not yet experienced the difference
           | between the perspective-altering practice of "looking inward"
           | through mindfulness and the lost-in-thought version, which
           | looks a lot more like rumination and just experiencing the
           | thought loop without perspective, which can be deeply
           | painful.
           | 
           | These practices are full of paradox. This isn't to say the
           | practice is invalid, but to highlight the fact that such
           | practice is not intuitive or obvious. Evolutionary psychology
           | is helping us unpack the illusions that lead to such apparent
           | paradox.
           | 
           | One such paradox being that looking inward through the
           | practice of mindfulness is the thing that enables someone to
           | look outward and actually _see_. Most people struggle to
           | describe this in words, but it starts to emerge clearly with
           | practice.
           | 
           | Put another way, the premise is that we are all so lost in
           | thought by default that we don't even realize we are
           | thinking. To claim that we can see outward in this state is
           | to remain unaware of the possibility space of what is
           | available to see, and to remain controlled by thought. You'll
           | still "see", but this seeing is distorted by evolutionary
           | reward systems, and what you think you're seeing is still
           | suspect.
           | 
           | But seeing the truth about one's own mind changes how one
           | sees other people in deeply impactful ways.
           | 
           | For me personally, my internal anxiety and self talk was so
           | dominant that it made some outward pursuits feel nearly
           | impossible. Once my relationship with thoughts/feelings
           | started to shift, it didn't just help with the anxiety in the
           | sense that it subsided, it fundamentally shifted my
           | relationship with the concept of anxiety, and made it
           | possible for me to examine it from a broader perspective
           | instead of just experiencing and being swallowed by it.
           | 
           | You go from knowing that anxiety (etc.) is a feeling to
           | _experiencing_ that anxiety is a feeling, and one that
           | appears alongside everything else in consciousness. The
           | difference between these states is enormous.
        
         | m3kw9 wrote:
         | Maybe the brain is smart, once you know meditation works, it
         | then anticipates it to work. The expectation of it working
         | interferes with the actual mindfulness and you take longer and
         | longer.
         | 
         | Is a law of diminishing utility thing and also a basic instinct
         | for people to get used to stuff the more they are exposed
        
         | heydemo wrote:
         | One of the findings from researchers in the book Altered Traits
         | is that largest (positive) cerebral changes were associated
         | with time spent at intensive retreats. This is also very much a
         | part of Zen practice (etc) so presumably practitioners have
         | found some additional value in intensives over the years.
        
         | starkd wrote:
         | I have a theory that meditation/mindfulness is essentially just
         | an excercise in self-erasure. This can be beneficial to some
         | degree in that we all need to erase those negative associations
         | and question our assumptions. However, carried to an extreme,
         | it can erase some of the associations we need to make in order
         | to live and create extreme hyper-selfawareness. Or in other
         | words, you open up your mind too much, your brains start to
         | fall out.
        
         | pmart123 wrote:
         | I'm no expert, but this still seems like avoidance more than
         | mindfulness. Obviously, meditating for six hours as a means to
         | escape and avoid uncomfortable thoughts is healthier than
         | blacking out or doing opioids, but it's still escaping versus
         | being present, processing, and facing uncomfortable feelings
         | and emotions.
        
       | kwertyoowiyop wrote:
       | Meditation sounds a bit like spice on your food. A little can be
       | good, too much isn't. And if you don't like it, stop.
        
       | tk17 wrote:
       | I have severe panic attacks and was basically unemployable for 5
       | years. It's impossible to say what happened here. I had a similar
       | array of experiences and I still think meditation is a net
       | positive and that these experiences are very rare. But the nocebo
       | effect is powerful and it can be a bitch.
       | 
       | Meditation is probably fine. I don't see a reason to reject the
       | null hypothesis that it is no more dangerous than any other
       | intense pursuit. Work and capitalism probably have 10,000x the
       | psychiatric casualty rate. In fact, open plan offices are
       | probably more dangerous than an LSD trip once per year (though I
       | don't recommend the latter except in a controlled therapeutic
       | setting).
        
       | kashif wrote:
       | I think he had a panic attack
        
       | bjt2n3904 wrote:
       | > I spent my last day in Los Angeles riding on a Segway, buying
       | legal marijuana and staring at some turtles in an on-campus pond
       | at UCLA.
       | 
       | Yeah, I'm sure that has nothing to do with psychotic breakdowns.
        
         | tough wrote:
         | Segway's are really potent
        
       | Zachsa999 wrote:
       | Innocent question by a non meditator.
       | 
       | Every couple months when it takes an hour or two to fall asleep,
       | I get this otherworldly feeling; like a specific part of my body
       | is growing unbelievably heavy, large and uncontrollable. It feels
       | like this body part will end up crushing me, suffocating me,
       | imploding, etc. It feels like it's happening to me, but I am not
       | in my body. I start to feel emotions start to wash by me, it
       | starts with curiosity, shifts to discomfort then quickly on to
       | anxiety, fear, depression, terror, and once the last three in a
       | horrifying mix.
       | 
       | It started when I was young, probably 10 or 12, and has slightly
       | decreased over time. I'm closer to 25 now, and it's lost it's
       | hold slightly. Two or three times it got me out of bed and pacing
       | around grabbing things for fear of death or an unimaginable
       | irrational fear of my swelling tounge. Currently I have a high
       | level of control over it, I can choose whether I want to dive in
       | or what level of emotion I want to experience.
       | 
       | Is this an accidental over application of meditation? Is it
       | dementia at an extremely young age?
       | 
       | I would love to hear your thoughts.
        
         | zozbot234 wrote:
         | The state of being about to fall asleep is an altered state of
         | consciousness, and not too different from the states that are
         | entered while meditating. The standard way to address it would
         | be to try and bring that state of anxiety, fear and terror
         | towards a calm equanimity: a sense and intuition that no matter
         | what happens, everything will be okay. This might even help you
         | realize that you actually have some unresolved baggage or
         | stress to work through that's blocking this path and leaving
         | you with that anxiety. But that's quite common and not very
         | hard to address in turn.
        
           | Zachsa999 wrote:
           | Thanks for the comment.
           | 
           | I agree, and my experience has been that I can turn it all
           | off. I didn't put it here as a "help me god" but it's been on
           | the back of my mind for years, and I was hoping someone here
           | might have academic knowledgeable with this exact experience.
        
         | mikem170 wrote:
         | Some of what you said reminds me of a friend of mine who had
         | "night terrors". This friend described how they would sometimes
         | wake up in the wrong order. Their conscious mind would wake up
         | while the body was still paralyzed with sleep, typically with a
         | terrible feeling of dread, like someone behind them is going to
         | attack them and they can't move. What you described made me
         | wonder if sometimes you fall asleep in the wrong order.
        
           | Zachsa999 wrote:
           | Thanks for the comment. Interesting observation, you suggest
           | that I am experiencing a form of lucid dreaming, but I only
           | notice it when I experience a specific dream?
           | 
           | One thing that is constant throughout app these occurrences
           | is the emotional path and my mouth lips and tongue that
           | experience this feeling.
        
             | mikem170 wrote:
             | I googled and found the correct term for what bothered my
             | friend: Sleep Paralysis [0]:
             | 
             | > Sleep paralysis is a condition identified by a brief loss
             | of muscle control, known as atonia , that happens just
             | after falling asleep or waking up. In addition to atonia,
             | people often experience hallucinations during episodes of
             | sleep paralysis.
             | 
             | I didn't get as far as knowing if there are mitigations. I
             | saw where it can happen falling asleep and waking up, so
             | maybe it is relevant.
             | 
             | [0] https://www.sleepfoundation.org/parasomnias/sleep-
             | paralysis
        
       | sinuhe69 wrote:
       | If you mediate, you should be aided by a master or friends. You
       | should not mediate, especially deep mediate in a confusing state
       | of mind, when you are panic or exhausted, when you are hungry or
       | too full. If you don't follow the rules and practice according to
       | your levels, you can hallucinate and harm yourself (Zou Huo Ru Mo
       | ). These are very clear advises from every Buddhist school.
       | 
       | Meditation is one way to practice mindfulness. It's NOT the only
       | one. It's by no way the silver bullet for all your problems. It's
       | also not a technique recommend for beginners. No Buddhist master
       | would recommend it for you, if you haven't studied the Buddhist
       | teachings sufficiently.
       | 
       | Above all, Buddhist meditation should always be practiced in
       | accordance with the Buddhist teachings, first and foremost with
       | compassion in mind. Abuse any technique and it will bring harm,
       | especially on yourself.
        
       | schnable wrote:
       | Sounds like a bad acid trip.
        
       | hislaziness wrote:
       | I think the author is confusing Buddhism and mindfulness.
        
       | FrustratedMonky wrote:
       | Buddhism is all about reducing suffering. BUT, once a large group
       | gets together in an organization, like with the big Zen Centers,
       | they fall prey to the same organizational defenses. The
       | organization becomes more important than the individuals, just
       | like any corporation, it becomes a beast with its own survival
       | instincts. Once this happens, you could argue that they are no
       | longer representing Buddhism.
       | 
       | But this is pretty tough issue, or balance, because meditation
       | does help people, so how do they get exposed if there is no
       | organization? People have to get started somewhere, so some
       | weekend meditation courses or sittings are good for an
       | organization to 'organize' and get the word out.
       | 
       | The big mistake is people jumping right into these long week long
       | silent retreats. Those are supposed to be for advanced
       | meditators, not right off the couch. Like doing a 10K right from
       | the couch, don't do a week long retreat from nothing.
        
       | magwa101 wrote:
       | [dead]
        
       | golemotron wrote:
       | It is notable at the author keeps using frames like "harmful",
       | pathologizing what is really just direct contact with one's
       | sensations and experiences. A less enculturated person might be
       | able to go with the flow they've newly tapped into without
       | fighting it. There's a lot of grasping ego.
       | 
       | The thing they don't seem to get is that what they are experience
       | may just be normal consciousness to many people who don't have a
       | mind that is continually discriminating and sorting. I take more
       | as an indictment of the disconnection our culture creates in
       | people than the practice itself.
        
       | neilellis wrote:
       | Yep that's what an intense panic attack feels like. Literally the
       | worst experience you can imagine. His description matches my own
       | worst experiences. And yes it would freak anyone out.
       | 
       | Guess how I overcame them :-) yep, you guessed, meditation - but
       | it took time. I no longer have panic attacks but it was not a
       | smooth journey. I also made big life changes and spent a lot of
       | time in nature, coupled with medications.
       | 
       | On reflection I was pushing myself hard and was filled with ego -
       | I'd had difficulties in the past before I started meditating and
       | was massively overworking myself. A crash was inevitable. I am
       | humbled by what I passed through - and that in itself is a
       | victory.
       | 
       | Do I think meditation 'caused' the panic attacks, no, it brought
       | to the surface something that was pretty much inevitable because
       | of how I was living my life. Should I have treated meditation
       | more respectfully and seriously. Yes, for sure.
       | 
       | Meditation is not a miracle drug, a panacea or a therapy. It
       | should be viewed as the journey out of suffering - and that path
       | by its very nature is likely to confront you with difficult
       | experiences. If I can offer a tip or two from my own experiences
       | :-
       | 
       | AGAIN: Meditation is not a miracle drug, a panacea or a therapy.
       | 
       | Serious meditation is a serious endeavour, like free-climbing.
       | You should never take it lightly and you must be serious about
       | it. When you take something seriously you do so with awareness of
       | the dangers and the hardships you may face.
       | 
       | You may have genuinely very difficult experiences as the OP did,
       | that is why it's important to have an experienced and wise
       | Teacher. They can help you face these experiences and help you to
       | grow stronger by doing so.
       | 
       | Take your time, the path is a long path, don't try for Nibbana by
       | Tuesday, instead look for small concrete improvements and build
       | on them over time. Be humble and realise that you have a lot of
       | stuff to deal with and it takes time.
       | 
       | NEVER EVER lie, omit or exaggerate on an application form. This
       | is how meditation teachers determine the risk of you having an
       | experience you can't deal with. This was mentioned in the
       | article, but I can say for sure that the teachers of Goenka
       | retreats do try their hardest to not accept people on causes who
       | might have difficulties. They also do drill in the idea that it's
       | a serious undertaking.
       | 
       | If you have a difficult experience and can face it, even a
       | little, your mind is stronger for it. The next time it happens
       | maybe you can face it a little more.
       | 
       | I hope this article does not put people off meditation, it turned
       | my life around. But at the same time, I hope people can take away
       | the seriousness of such endeavours as the article does highlight.
       | 
       | When something that over a 100,000 people a year do any activity
       | there will always be a tragic story. Be it running a marathon,
       | boating or driving cars. Of course we should do everything
       | possible to avoid that happening. But we do need to be realistic
       | and acknowledge that tragedies do happen even when people have
       | the mental equivalent of a driving license, air bags, seat belts
       | and drive carefully.
       | 
       | Wishing you all happiness.
        
       | ergonaught wrote:
       | I read this when it was first published and I'll just continue to
       | accept the author's assertions that they are
       | experienced/informed/educated and point out that the
       | "mindfulness" style of "meditation" is entirely different from
       | the concentration-based styles of "meditation".
       | 
       | It at least sounds like they were unaware of the differences, and
       | unaware that the concentration-based styles are quite well
       | documented as tending to produce various phenomena (glorious or
       | horrifying and all points between and beyond) on the route.
       | 
       | Even ignoring "awakening kundalini" types of things that other
       | commenters mentioned, this is where most practitioners would say
       | this kind of experience is why it helps to have a "guru" for
       | assistance.
        
       | denton-scratch wrote:
       | I have been told that Trungpa said "they always run".
       | 
       | The context was people on retreats jumping up from their
       | meditation cushion and running away as fast as they can, not to
       | reach some destination, but just to escape. I've never witnessed
       | this, but I never did many retreats.
       | 
       | The practice wasn't the jhanas, it was meditation on emptiness.
       | The idea is that when you achieve a certain level of realisation
       | into emptiness, a sudden and irreversible change occurs, like a
       | seismic shift, which results in terror. The practioner runs
       | mainly to get away from the place where it happened (i.e., the
       | cushion). Apparently they keep running until they feel safe.
       | 
       | I was told that the jhanas (roughly, single-pointed
       | concentration) were particularly risky, because it's easy to do
       | them wrong. Note that the jhanas are not a type of mindfulness
       | practice; the author seems to conflate them.
       | 
       | > mainstream branding of mindfulness meditation as a panacea for
       | all our woes.
       | 
       | The fundamental purpose of mindfulness practice in Buddhism is to
       | convince yourself that your sense of selfhood is false. Because
       | we are so strongly attached to the sense of selfhood, achieving
       | that conviction is going to be a wrench. In western psychology,
       | the loss of a sense of selfhood is called "dissociation", and is
       | a pathology. McMindfulness ignores all that.
       | 
       | I once had negative experiences of meditation on emptiness; I was
       | told to stop doing it. I'm quite certain that my experiences were
       | not the result of any realisation!
        
         | zozbot234 wrote:
         | I think you're conflating the concentration and insight
         | jhanas/meditative practices. What you said about losing the
         | sense of self is true of the insight jhanas, but "mindfulness"
         | as a meditative practice is more reminiscent of concentration.
         | Also, it's not like "losing the sense of self" is always bad
         | for you; it depends how deep your attachment to the self was in
         | the first place. Sila (moral and ethical practice) and
         | intellectual insights like Stoicism can help you gradually
         | loosen the notion that a personal self must be integral to
         | existence, without abandoning it completely.
        
         | passion__desire wrote:
         | The running is to bring in line the higher cognition centers to
         | the physiology of body which is what brain should be doing,
         | sort of like syncing up.
        
         | yakubin wrote:
         | Mindfulness is the new agile. Every criticism is deflected with
         | "you're not doing it right".
        
           | starkd wrote:
           | There is something very cultish about it. An indication of it
           | being a cult is the tendency to get caught up in definitions
           | of new words. It is easy to think that once you learn the
           | vocabulary (like "vipassana", "sati", or whatever), you are
           | have achieved something, when all you are doing is reciting
           | new words but the thinking is done for you.
        
             | astrange wrote:
             | Well... it's literally a religion. And those are just
             | foreign words.
             | 
             | McMindfulness (the stuff you'd get corporate trainings
             | about) doesn't teach you any of those words, uses several
             | different techniques at once, gives regular people little
             | bits of the techniques used for monks to develop revulsion
             | for all earthly things, etc.
        
               | starkd wrote:
               | Seems like having revulsion for all earthly things can
               | backfire in unpredictable ways. I have a suspicion that
               | the early Buddhist may have been onto something, but
               | something vital was lost a long time ago.
        
         | wirrbel wrote:
         | Realisation of no self (anatta) would be canonically fit into
         | vipssana meditation whereas mindfulness (sati) is something
         | done for concentration practice
        
           | denton-scratch wrote:
           | I did a lot of mindfulness sitting practice. We were
           | specifically directed not to attempt concentration. There's
           | more than one kind of mindfulness, and more than one kind of
           | vipassana. I was mainly taught vipassana as something that
           | arises naturally from shamatha; but I've been on courses
           | where it was taught as a systematic exploration of the
           | skhandas, to convince yourself that there is no self in the
           | five skhandas.
           | 
           | I've also been to McMindfulness groups, where they blended
           | shamatha-type mindfulness with guided vipassana meditation.
           | It makes no sense to me, to teach vipassana divorced from the
           | no-self doctrine, and all the abhidharma ideas about the
           | skhandas and the different kinds of consciousness.
           | 
           | Shamatha is "calm abiding", which I think is what the
           | McMindfulness crowd are trying to teach. It should really be
           | treated as a sort of universal preliminary for most other
           | types of meditation. But it's perfectly reasonable to treat
           | shamatha as your main practice (as I did).
           | 
           | I was told that chod is a specifically Tibetan practice; I
           | don't know what it would be called in Sanskrit. It's a
           | visualisation practice, in which you imagine chopping up your
           | body and your senses, and make an offering of them. I've
           | never tried it; I was told it's scary. I was also told it's
           | sutrayana, although the visualisation makes it sound
           | vajrayana. I guess chod is a kind of vipassana?
        
             | wirrbel wrote:
             | > There's more than one kind of mindfulness, and more than
             | one kind of vipassana
             | 
             | Definitely true, by itself sati/smrti is a hard-to-
             | translate term.
             | 
             | > Shamatha is "calm abiding", which I think is what the
             | McMindfulness crowd are trying to teach. It should really
             | be treated as a sort of universal preliminary for most
             | other types of meditation. But it's perfectly reasonable to
             | treat shamatha as your main practice (as I did).
             | 
             | I am mostly focussing on some breathing mindfulness
             | meditation and some metta, not much, but enough that I feel
             | a calming effect, and I overall am trying to foster some
             | 'buddhist values' in my life.
             | 
             | > I was told that chod is a specifically Tibetan practice;
             | I don't know what it would be called in Sanskrit. It's a
             | visualisation practice, in which you imagine chopping up
             | your body and your senses, and make an offering of them.
             | I've never tried it; I was told it's scary. I was also told
             | it's sutrayana, although the visualisation makes it sound
             | vajrayana. I guess chod is a kind of vipassana?
             | 
             | I heard of meditating on your 'own decaying body'
             | definitely from a theravada context, but was overall warned
             | that meditation objects from the imagination are more risky
             | overall for psychological emergencies.
             | 
             | > sutrayana
             | 
             | That sounds like Bhante Vimalaramsi?
        
               | denton-scratch wrote:
               | No idea what Bhante Vimalaramsi is. I used the term as a
               | synonym for sravakayana; I think I probably used it
               | incorrectly, it should probably include a lot of mahayana
               | practice (because mahayana sutras). Maybe it just means
               | "practices that don't depend on revealed teachings". At
               | any rate, "not tantrayana".
        
               | wirrbel wrote:
               | Ah, Bhante Vimalaramsi is an american monk originally
               | from the theravada tradition who IIRC uses Sutrayana for
               | his take on what the Pali canon says, as he deviates from
               | the theravada interpretation of the text.
        
               | astrange wrote:
               | "Sutrayana" meaning "not Vajrayana" is typical for
               | Tibetan Buddhism.
        
         | oska wrote:
         | > The fundamental purpose of mindfulness practice in Buddhism
         | is to convince yourself that your sense of selfhood is false.
         | Because we are so strongly attached to the sense of selfhood,
         | achieving that conviction is going to be a wrench.
         | 
         | I found quite a few signs of egotism in the writer, so I'm not
         | surprised that he experienced a great wrench in confronting his
         | sense of selfhood. And then lashes out at the teachings and
         | practices he had previously rushed to embrace.
        
           | SV_BubbleTime wrote:
           | I'm not sure if anyone could read that story and not at least
           | heard some of the B-side track.
        
       | scop wrote:
       | Had anybody else noticed that for many Stoicism has replaced
       | Buddhism as the "cool" and "intellectual" spirituality amongst
       | those in the liberal tech world?
        
         | zozbot234 wrote:
         | Stoicism is more like Buddhism on easy mode for those in the
         | Western tradition. Even Buddhists themselves are very clear
         | that one should not pursue serious meditation unless they have
         | their sila (morality, ethical behavior) down pat and are at an
         | appropriate stage of life where they have the time and means
         | for it; Stoicism is all about the practice of sila. If you skip
         | on that, you end up with stories like OP's, and the people
         | suffering psychotic breaks while on a meditative retreat.
        
           | scop wrote:
           | I really appreciate your comment. I think I'll remember the
           | phrase "Buddhism on easy mode" for the rest of my life!
           | 
           | Your observation about preparation, behavior, state of life
           | etc is also very poignant. I am Catholic and something that
           | I've found delving into the writings of the saints is that it
           | is often like staring at the sun: it's too intense and I'm
           | not ready for it. For example, when I was an atheist in
           | college I read St Augustine's Confessions and found it
           | interesting from a philosophical point of view and an easy
           | read. Now, as a believing and practicing Catholic, I can't
           | even finish the book. It's spiritual fruit, of which I was
           | ignorant in my youth, are too intense for me. I come back to
           | it every couple of years and each time make it a little bit
           | further.
           | 
           | That is all to say, it is funny how in mainstream discourse
           | about religion/spirituality there is very little mention of
           | "ability". "Religious practice" is most certainly a skill
           | that is acquired and refined through hard work (and grace).
        
             | zozbot234 wrote:
             | The Catholic tradition and Christian tradition in general
             | are deeply informed by Stoicism, especially Stoic ethics.
             | So coming from that kind of tradition, you might find that
             | you're already aware of many of these things, even if you
             | couldn't quite tell where they originally came from.
        
           | marginalia_nu wrote:
           | It's probably no coincidence Stoicism (and Cynicism) appeared
           | in the centuries following Alexander's campaign to India, and
           | the bidirectional greco-indian cultural exchange that
           | followed.
           | 
           | (It's also no coincidence that a Indian Buddhist monks
           | ostensibly wear orange togas; not that the Romans conquered
           | India or the Indians went to Rome, but the two seem to have
           | been inspired by the Greek Chiton and Himation)
           | 
           | This cultural exchange is pretty fascinating thing in
           | general. Here are some complementary reading:
           | 
           | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greco-Buddhism
           | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buddhism_in_Greece
        
         | [deleted]
        
       | spccdt wrote:
       | Reminds me of a similar anecdote from Holly Elmore in 2021 [1].
       | 
       | [1] https://hollyelmore.substack.com/p/i-believed-the-hype-
       | and-d...
        
         | ccooffee wrote:
         | Thanks for sharing. Your article feels a lot more intimate
         | (less analytical) than the OP's. In particular, I was delighted
         | to read the "Harm: loss of 3D vision" section because I now
         | realize that my experience of rarely perceiving 3D isn't just
         | me making things up. In particular:
         | 
         | > I can pop in and out of 2D and 3D vision at will, it's just
         | that 2D is the default, and 3D always feels more real.
         | 
         | I _wish_ I could do this at will. Probably once a month or so I
         | notice that I have 3D vision and become entranced with just
         | looking at things around me. Usually the feeling subsides
         | within an hour, but it's rarely a "pop out" and more a gradual
         | decline in how 3D things are.
         | 
         | And now I'm off to the wikipedia rabbit hole to learn more
         | about this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stereopsis_recovery
        
       | cat_plus_plus wrote:
       | "The short answer is that in 2009 I started a fist fight in a
       | French Quarter bar over some jambalaya, a steamy kiss, and a
       | stray comment I didn't take fondly" - the author should seriously
       | consider the possibility that their later issues had more to do
       | with whatever led to this episode in the first place than with
       | meditation, which is not a magic cure all. People are not likely
       | to think themselves in or out of psychosis, although there can be
       | a triggering even for onset of symptoms that would emerge anyway.
       | Better understanding of the underlying condition can lead to
       | better treatment, likely with Western medicine and therapy,
       | possibly also with meditation/yoga tailored to these symptoms.
       | Relaxing is generally good for you, seeking intense experiences
       | with one is already on edge is counterproductive.
        
       | adamgordonbell wrote:
       | Scott Alexander had reviews of Dan Ingram and related 'modern day
       | enlightened'. I seem to recall a suggestion that these people
       | could be considered to have developed something like a self
       | induced, positive version of dissociative personality disorder.
       | 
       | They would get angry or hungry or grumpy, but 'they' were a step
       | away from this person that was hungry or angry or whatever.
       | 
       | It's like they had zoomed in and drawn some separations between
       | the various layers of consciousness that we consider all one and
       | the same.
       | 
       | Fascinating, but not something I'm interested in doing.
        
         | zozbot234 wrote:
         | > these people could be considered to have developed something
         | like a self induced, positive version of dissociative
         | personality disorder.
         | 
         | Yes, the self disorders https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-
         | disorders of schizophrenics (such as feeling like thoughts are
         | being radioed into your head) read like what might be expected
         | to happen if one reaches sudden, involuntary awareness of the
         | three marks of existence without having done any sort of
         | meditative or even devotional practice, let alone reached any
         | enlightenment. This only underscores that awareness of the
         | three characteristics is part of what frees us from dukkha but
         | is not in itself sufficient; after all, people who undergo
         | these psychotic breaks are obviously very deeply mired in
         | craving and dukkha.
        
         | cracoucax wrote:
         | Daniel Ingram is a deluded fool, and imo being this deluded
         | probably means a sort of mental disorder. His book and system
         | just show how far away from any real form of enlightenment he
         | is. Sadly because he sounds modern & a little scientific people
         | keep taking him seriously. No, the Vipassana nanas are not what
         | he describes. Anyone wondering about him should just forget
         | this stuff, burn this book and go to a retreat with a well
         | known teacher.
        
           | zozbot234 wrote:
           | Are you basing this purely on reading about supposedly
           | enlightened people getting angry or grumpy? That's a
           | surprisingly common thing, actually. I know that Ingram's
           | claims of arahatship are controversial and quite possibly
           | mistaken (i.e. it's quite possible that there are levels to
           | enlightenment well beyond what he discusses, especially wrt.
           | the grounding of sila and renouncing one's cravings), but
           | that's not to say one should dismiss his whole teaching.
        
             | cracoucax wrote:
             | Basically what he did what read about the "insight
             | knownledges", (which are initially described in the
             | Visuddhimagga, in a very loose way), and interpret them in
             | whatever ways he sees fit, then proceed to see his, and
             | everyone's life through the lens of that. He even diagnose
             | everyone like an MD on his forums. (And incidentally, he
             | /is/ a MD.)
             | 
             | You hear a dog bark and feel afraid ? Do you do meditation
             | ? yes ? Surely you must be in a Bhaya nana phase, and are
             | on your way to enlightenment. Because bhaya = fear. Did you
             | already experience that a few years ago ? did you go
             | through this and that extremely loosely defined stages ?
             | Then surely you are already a Sotapanna and are headed to
             | the attainment of once-returner.
             | 
             | Based on this he is an Arahant (because he says he cycled
             | the insight knownledges 4 times).
             | 
             | But being an Arahat basically means being free of ill will,
             | desire of the senses, and of a sense of self-existent self
             | (and other things). It does not mean "just go though those
             | phases, and that's it, that's his own reduction of the path
             | to a few pages in the Visuddhimagga, which i would not even
             | consider canonical personally.
             | 
             | > Are you basing this purely on reading about supposedly
             | enlightened people getting angry or grumpy? That's a
             | surprisingly common thing, actually.
             | 
             | People believing they are enlightened are common in some
             | circles, yes, and it's always a red flag imo.
             | 
             | Yes, an Arhat does not get angry, that's in the very
             | definition of the term: ill will has been totally
             | eliminated. You cannot say you are an Arahat but you get
             | angry, it would just mean you are something else than an
             | Arhat, by definition.
        
       | fjfaase wrote:
       | This has been discussed before:
       | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=27890790
        
         | dang wrote:
         | Thanks! Macroexpanded:
         | 
         |  _My mindfulness practice led me to meltdown_ -
         | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=27890790 - July 2021 (568
         | comments)
        
       | lr4444lr wrote:
       | I suffered from bad anxiety for a while post pandemic.
       | 
       | Mindfulness meditation made me feel better during and for about
       | half an hour afterward, but it wasn't "me again": it was some
       | altered state that not only wasn't addressing the underlying
       | issues (that I've since made great strides on in psychotherapy).
       | I felt periods of great calm, but it was as if I was taking some
       | drug to achieve an altered state.
       | 
       | I read a lot about how to "bring the meditative state into daily
       | life", and that only made the anxiety worse when it broke
       | through, because it sensitized me to focus increasingly on
       | internal physical phenomena. Yeah, I tried not to "judge" them,
       | to neither anticipate their arrival and to just observe their
       | rise and fall, but the observing meant attention, and the
       | attention magnified them.
       | 
       | I finally beat the anxiety mostly for good by acknowledging and
       | facing the problems in my life. I haven't even solved much of
       | them yet, but I'm pretty honest about it both to myself and the
       | people close to me.
        
         | coffeebeqn wrote:
         | Me too, I had always had low level anxiety+depression but at
         | the end of the pandemic it went out of control. Your comment
         | made me think that people like to self medicate. Maybe a 10 day
         | silent retreat is not that different from a heroic dose of
         | psilocybin. Both are certainly high risk (potentially high
         | reward) maneuvers to treat a mental health problem.
         | 
         | Meditation was mildly helpful but it wasn't really a practical
         | solution for a working parent. You can't hit pause on your life
         | very often. SSRIs it is for now
        
       | revskill wrote:
       | To me, real meditation comes after hard work, really painfully
       | hard work to make the system convenient before the rest period.
       | 
       | You need to solve your life issues in first place to do whatever
       | you want.
       | 
       | Stay, doing nor thinking nothing about it? No, the problems is
       | still there.
       | 
       | You don't make it go away with your wasting time doing nothing
       | like a Buddha (Buddha has no life issues to solve).
        
       | throwaway71271 wrote:
       | as Jung says: the western individual is ready do travel great
       | lengths, go farthest to the east, in the deserts, in the ice,
       | meditate, change what they eat, what they drink, they will do
       | anything, but look inside themselves.
        
         | qikInNdOutReply wrote:
         | Sublimation and carefully crafted neurosis to turn us all into
         | powertools our society wields?
        
           | throwaway71271 wrote:
           | thats what McKenna says :)
        
       | quijoteuniv wrote:
       | I though i read "my me me let me to a meltdown" . No, joke aside.
       | Moderation is good. Not everything needs to be intense. Some
       | people that have use drugs tend to arrive to meditation as a
       | replacement of those intense experiences. No need to be famous,
       | tell my story, and yes there are a lot of lunatics conducting
       | retreats with no idea on what they are doing. And yes if you play
       | with fire you tend to get burned. Also i find that meditation
       | usually and gently can release some energy, but that does mean
       | that your are smarter. I am just the same idiot with more energy
       | :)
        
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