[HN Gopher] How to live near your friends
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       How to live near your friends
        
       Author : vwoolf
       Score  : 21 points
       Date   : 2023-02-05 15:21 UTC (7 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (prigoose.substack.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (prigoose.substack.com)
        
       | moralestapia wrote:
       | This is one of the nicest things about studying abroad as its
       | very common for all students to live together and/or in the same
       | neghborhoods. There's always something happening within walking
       | distance. Good times!
        
       | legerdemain wrote:
       | It really sounds like the author is female, has many female
       | friends, and leads some kind of "Sex and the City" New York
       | lifestyle.
       | 
       | Like, maybe this works in NYC for some dedicated people, but in
       | less dense, less hip, less young, less trendy settings, _none of
       | these things work_ , or at least they're not very relevant.
       | 
       | Like, maybe it would work if I moved to a very posh place in
       | SoMa, and I had a bunch of girlfriends who I could tantalize with
       | the location and the decor and the rooftop nightclub. But I
       | don't, won't, and almost no one does, either.
       | 
       | The coolest event at my neighborhood cafe is homework club and
       | it's a couple doors down from a fraternal Eagles Lounge with a
       | pool table and a jukebox. There are plenty of places to live
       | listed on Zillow, although they're neither cheap nor necessarily
       | very nice. Most people I know work from home, rarely leave home,
       | and lead lives of Netflix.
        
         | legerdemain wrote:
         | OK, I lied. The coolest event at my neighborhood cafe is a 6am
         | motorcycle club meetup before their group ride, but I don't
         | have a hawg and have no intent to buy one.
        
         | vostok wrote:
         | > Like, maybe this works in NYC
         | 
         | It sounds like the author deliberately moved to NYC. They
         | didn't just accidentally end up in a place where this is
         | possible.
        
           | legerdemain wrote:
           | Where in the blog post do you see that?
        
       | mark_l_watson wrote:
       | While I agree with what the author says, there is another
       | strategy also: frequently walk around your neighborhood, be
       | friendly, attend local events, etc. I am a tech-person who lives
       | in a small town in the mountains. There are people to make
       | friends with everywhere - but they may not share your exact job
       | skills, technical interests, etc.
        
       | daveevad wrote:
       | The first two tips: host dinner parties and sublet your apartment
       | are not widely applicable.
        
         | newaccount74 wrote:
         | I agree on the subletting part, but why is hosting dinner
         | parties "not widely applicable"?
        
           | legerdemain wrote:
           | Not the same person, but in my case:
           | 
           | - I don't have friends nearby, so I'd be mostly having a
           | "come one, come all" potluck with strangers in my building.
           | 
           | - All the units in my building are the same, so no one is
           | curious to come over.
           | 
           | - About half the units are corporate apartments rented by
           | Google for visiting employees and applicants.
           | 
           | - No one uses the online message board, except the leasing
           | office employees.
        
           | daveevad wrote:
           | from my perspective, both require way more disposable income
           | and time than is reasonably available. perhaps i'm not being
           | charitable and full disclosure: i don't live near many
           | friends.
        
         | vostok wrote:
         | Those tips sound really useful and actionable to me.
         | 
         | Hosting dinner parties regularly even if you're tired is a
         | great idea. I'm going to try doing this.
         | 
         | I probably don't want to co-sign an apartment, but letting
         | people stay with me for a long-ish period of time sounds good.
         | That seems doable for someone on a typical Facebook / Google /
         | etc income.
        
           | Aicy wrote:
           | Neither are possible for me. I live in a small bedroom flat.
           | The biggest dinner party I could have is two guests and I
           | can't sublet a room when there is only one.
        
           | FoomFries wrote:
           | My spouse and I regularly do a Wednesday night dinner. One
           | person cooks, everyone eats, and the cook rotates. People get
           | a small break from the weekly grind while leaving early
           | enough to work the next day. People get a nice social
           | conversation, and most of them get a night off of cooking. It
           | works quite well if you can get your friends to commit to it.
        
       | testybesty2 wrote:
       | It definitely helps living in a city as dense as new york...
        
         | Eumenes wrote:
         | nyc is prob the easiest place to make friends on the planet
        
         | jshaqaw wrote:
         | This is why people pay the rent to live here
        
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       (page generated 2023-02-05 23:02 UTC)