[HN Gopher] Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SW...
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
        
       Author : sbuccini
       Score  : 767 points
       Date   : 2022-12-28 15:21 UTC (7 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (www.stevenbuccini.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (www.stevenbuccini.com)
        
       | adamwong246 wrote:
       | Gosh it's so hard these days. So much of the past 10 years was
       | easy speculation and I have certainly let that go to my head.
       | Even as a fresh grad, I had people beating down my door.
       | Suddenly, it's all quiet. I'm reduced to working at the grocery
       | store- a humbling experience for sure.
        
       | mikestaszel wrote:
       | Coincidentally(?), "Laid off tech workers quickly find new jobs"
       | (https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34161528) is also on the HN
       | front page right now.
        
         | AdrianB1 wrote:
         | It very much depends on their specialty. Some niche position
         | are available once a year or less, in my country, while regular
         | developers are hired by the thousand every month.
        
       | nijave wrote:
       | >Do not disclose the current status of your interviewing process
       | 
       | Not sure exactly what this means but it's pretty common for
       | recruiters to check your timeline and try to work around it. For
       | instance, they'll try to expedite you if you already have offers
       | on the table or relax the timeline so it fits with interviews.
        
         | anon50118810 wrote:
         | I strongly recommend only sharing minimal information about
         | your job search with employers. Don't share when you started
         | looking, because if it's been a while then you'll look bad.
         | Don't share that you think you're far along in the process at
         | some other place, because if that falls through then you'll be
         | embarrassed if it comes up again or it might look like you were
         | lying to put pressure on them.
         | 
         | The fact that an employer could speed things up for you if you
         | have active prospects elsewhere is a little insulting because
         | it's the flip side of saying we know we can put you on the
         | backburner because you're unemployed and struggling.
         | 
         | You can say whether you're actively or passive looking, or if
         | you have a firm offer on the table, or if you're especially
         | interested in employers in some particular area if it makes you
         | look good with this employer. Otherwise don't bring your search
         | up and politely deflect questions if you can.
        
           | dinosaurdynasty wrote:
           | There's a big difference between telling (third-party)
           | recruiters and employers these things.
        
       | inthepipe wrote:
       | [dead]
        
       | pronlover723 wrote:
       | #1 it's lonely? April 2020, 1 month into the pandemic.
       | 
       | I found the pandemic lonely. I saw less than 1 person a month for
       | the first 14 months of the pandemic. And i find WFH incredibly
       | lonely. I haven't recovered. I'm utterly alone most weeks. I see
       | no one. Even if I go to work, no one is there. I moved cities a
       | year ago and have only 1 friend and 2 acquaintances in the new
       | city. 2 of those 3 are married and I see them maybe once a month,
       | if I'm lucky. The 3rd I haven't seen since August. The pandemic
       | as killed meetup.com. It used to be full of activities. I don't
       | think there is 1/20th of the activities there used to be.
        
         | 0xmarcin wrote:
         | Loneliness is bad in itself, but it can get worse if you are:
         | 
         | - Not going outside every day
         | 
         | - Not keeping yourself fit
         | 
         | - Eating junk food
         | 
         | In my region there is a lot of office only/mostly hybrid (3+
         | days in the office) jobs, probably for the reason that you
         | mention. Of course when I ask why I need to be in the office
         | people tell me about culture and stuff... But the true reason
         | is probably more along the lines: loneliness, small baby crying
         | at home, apartment not appropriate for remote work, annoying
         | roommates/spouse/during divorce.
         | 
         | Maybe changing jobs right now is not the best idea - so I will
         | not suggest it. I will only suggest to get real human contact,
         | as being on-line and talking on forums/social media does not
         | work (at least in my case).
         | 
         | If you have a chance you may try to find some meetup for
         | startup entrepreneurs, even if you are not interested in
         | startups. I find people there to be really hyped and full of
         | positive energy. Usually there is also a motivational speaker
         | there. YMMV but in my city there are some free and open
         | meetings like this.
        
           | nijave wrote:
           | Also
           | 
           | - Not exercising
        
         | sbuccini wrote:
         | Hey, author here. I get it, trust me. This post meant to
         | encapsulate my feelings during the one year I spent unemployed.
         | During that entire time, I was alone. I had a falling out with
         | my parents. I moved to a foreign country where I knew no one in
         | order to stretch my savings. I totally get it.
         | 
         | If you need to chat with someone, I'm happy to lend an ear.
         | Contact info is in my profile.
        
           | petesergeant wrote:
           | > I moved to a foreign country where I knew no one in order
           | to stretch my savings
           | 
           | I have found NomadList (nomadlist.com) and NomadSphere
           | (nomadsphere.io) invaluable for meeting up with people when
           | abroad, although usually people who are there to work
           | remotely.
        
         | petesergeant wrote:
         | Could you work "from home" from somewhere with a thriving
         | community of remote workers, like Mexico City? Or lookup Wifi
         | Tribe or similar?
        
         | mattmanser wrote:
         | Another option for meeting people is volunteering.
         | 
         | And almost any sport, appreciate you may not play any, but a
         | group of the same people go to the same thing week in week out.
         | You can even pick something where you can get lessons first
         | then join a club.
         | 
         | Sometimes there are more social sports clubs that aren't really
         | competitive. Here in the UK for example there are social
         | badminton clubs and competitive badminton clubs. You will get a
         | real mix of skill levels at the social clubs, and these might
         | have regular meetups outside of the badminton. The one I'm part
         | of do meals, theatre, outdoor events, etc. together. It depends
         | on the people running it.
        
         | psychphysic wrote:
         | Loneliness is a killer[0]. And we're doing ourselves no favours
         | with the way increasingly we meet people through apps and not
         | face to face.
         | 
         | I'd be lost without the friends I made in education settings.
         | This might sound silly but any chance you could swap a meetup
         | group with some sort of class? Art, writing especially
         | something that involves discussion?
         | 
         | [0]
         | https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/observations/loneliness...
        
         | cableshaft wrote:
         | Meetup.com seems to be sort of back where I'm at (Chicago
         | area). Some of the groups are now toast (including the one I
         | used to admin), but several are back to regular events again,
         | and there have been some new groups since.
         | 
         | I've tried to be a little careful still (still haven't gotten
         | Covid as far as I know, I don't know if I'll be asymptomatic or
         | end up in the hospital or something in between), and yet I've
         | gone to several picnics, hikes, board game nights, outdoor
         | hangouts, karaoke, movie nights, trivia, dinners, etc. via
         | Meetup.com this past year.
         | 
         | Also supplemented that with Facebook events and the local
         | forest preserve and local library's posted events.
         | 
         | I still have a core friend group (who I met thanks to
         | Meetup.com many years ago), but several of my other friends
         | have drifted off since the pandemic started (married and
         | started having children), so I started doing meetup more again
         | to compensate.
        
         | brightball wrote:
         | For what it's worth, I've been working from home for about 8
         | years now. The only way to make it work for me was deliberate
         | social activities with my neighbors, people from church or
         | local charity orgs (Rotary, etc).
         | 
         | I met them, I got their numbers and I started asking them to
         | lunch at least once a week (sometimes more). That small, very
         | determined activity just leads to more. You have to do it very
         | consistently.
         | 
         | Hosting a poker night is very similar. It will start small and
         | sometimes not happen, but you have to be relentlessly
         | consistent to get it established.
        
       | burntalmonds wrote:
       | This is why striving for financial independence is important.
        
       | heb3rt wrote:
       | chichi caca
        
       | mildweed wrote:
       | > Hard Truth #1: Getting laid off is a profoundly lonely
       | experience.
       | 
       | When I was laid off, it was very comforting to rebuild community
       | with others who were laid off at the same time.
       | 
       | We started a Slack instance where we:
       | 
       | * shared resources with each other
       | 
       | * complained and vented and healed together
       | 
       | * celebrated each other's new jobs
       | 
       | * continued the network for years after
        
         | kyrra wrote:
         | 100%. My last layoff was in 2011, but at that time they closed
         | the entire office I was in at the time (50 of us laid off). We
         | helped eachother find places to interview and met up once a
         | week to have lunch. I ended up working remotely with 3 of my
         | old co-workers.
        
       | nobodyandproud wrote:
       | I'd take #7 with a grain of salt: You're far more desirable once
       | you secure a job, than when you're unemployed.
       | 
       | If the company is mid-size or better _AND_ it's not a sweat shop,
       | take it while you assess your next move.
       | 
       | Don't make the mistake of staying put, however, unless the team
       | or company aligns with your interests.
       | 
       | Context: I took a break, got married, and started looking for SWE
       | work just when the "great recession" was looming.
       | 
       | It took me six months and some unpopular niche skills just
       | happened to open some opportunities. Just barely.
        
         | spikej wrote:
         | What were those niche skills, if you don't mind?
        
       | deeptote wrote:
       | The lesson here is to be overemployed, do at least one interview
       | process a quarter, and understand that companies don't give AF
       | about you.
        
         | rr808 wrote:
         | That is a big lesson I learned. I worked at a job for 8 years
         | without looking elsewhere and when I got laid off I was really
         | stuck because the market and interviewing circuit had
         | completely changed.
        
           | anon50118810 wrote:
           | I'm not sure it's a good trade-off to interview constantly
           | even when you have a job just to remove a bit of the learning
           | curve if you lose your job unexpectedly.
        
             | raydev wrote:
             | I recommend it. For me, unused skills will become
             | inaccessible relatively quickly, and interviews require a
             | specific set that aren't used at all in any of my jobs over
             | the years.
             | 
             | Once, I did heavy interview prep because I was bored with
             | my job at the time, I got good at it, and landed another
             | better job.
             | 
             | A year later my company deleted entire orgs of people, and
             | I quickly realized that I was in bad shape when my third
             | rejection rolled in.
             | 
             | Interviews are high pressure situations. Better to be used
             | to the flow, coding, and conversation style (again, think
             | "sales") than to be caught off guard, worrying about
             | whether you've solved a Leetcode question fast enough to
             | satisfy another human with their own grading quirks.
             | 
             | Oh, and that person is standing between you and a steady
             | paycheck. That's the part I have to practice anyway,
             | solving stupid university final problems when my livelihood
             | is on the line.
        
               | anon50118810 wrote:
               | It's a good idea to practice if you're trying to get up
               | the nerve to make the jump to a better job. But during a
               | job search, you'll either get so many rejections that
               | you'll get back up to speed quickly enough without
               | needing to also obsess about it while you're employed, or
               | you're hireable enough that you didn't need to worry
               | about it either way.
        
       | whoIsYou wrote:
       | My experience was a bit different. Got laid off the week after
       | thanksgiving. Being laid off was absolutely panic inducing. Got a
       | new job before Christmas thanks to intense focus and the decision
       | to accept a 3% paycut
        
       | senjin wrote:
       | Thank you for writing this. I have the sinking feeling I will be
       | laid off within the next 6 months and I am already starting to
       | get worried about the job search ahead. This is great preemptive
       | information, now I need the "so you're about to be laid off..."
       | post for someone who hasn't had to interview for a job in 15
       | years.
        
       | mouly wrote:
       | The article makes me wonder if a support group (nonprofit) for
       | laif off tech professionals with the goal of alleviating the
       | loneliness. It could be as simple as a weekly call with others
       | who have been laid off.
        
       | Koshkin wrote:
       | > _Maybe even Java._
       | 
       | Personally, I'd love to get to work with Java, after (many) years
       | of C++. Such an amazing technology and ecosystem.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | kagakuninja wrote:
         | I switched from C++ to Java 20 years ago, and never looked
         | back. Although I've been using Scala the last 7 years.
        
         | eddsh1994 wrote:
         | Grass is always greener!
        
       | mortenjorck wrote:
       | I just had the fourth layoff of my career earlier this month.
       | 
       | It doesn't get easier per se, but you do start to develop a
       | process, and having a process makes the whole ordeal a lot less
       | daunting.
       | 
       | Perhaps the most daunting part for me right now is that I've
       | spent the better part of a decade getting hired by people I
       | worked with before, and this is the first time no one in my
       | immediate network has a req open. Still, the value of a network
       | is paramount: To paraphrase another comment here, do good work
       | and be good to work with, and you will have people out there
       | looking for a reason to get you in the door.
        
       | sjellen wrote:
       | Being laid off can and will forever change your career risk
       | tolerance. When I got laid off in 2008, I stayed at the next job
       | probably 10 years longer than I should have because of effects of
       | being laid off.
        
         | shade wrote:
         | That's a good point, and I had a similar reaction. I got laid
         | off from my first job out of college in late 2006. Unemployed
         | for 3 months, found a role with a new company 2 hours away,
         | moved, and stayed there over 12 years because I didn't want to
         | take the risk of moving. That, and I let myself be too
         | intimidated by the interview process.
         | 
         | I eventually got laid off from there and found a new job after
         | a ~2 month stint of unemployment; stayed with my new company
         | for about 18 months and then changed to my current job of my
         | own volition to find something I was happier with rather than
         | sitting around being miserable.
        
         | rr808 wrote:
         | 7 years later after getting laid off and I'm still paranoid
         | about performance reviews and layoff rumors in the press. I
         | never used to be nervous about talking to people about my work
         | but it really affected me.
        
         | the_only_law wrote:
         | On the other hand, the aftermath of this layoff is making it
         | pretty clear to me that going I got this field was a mistake
         | and I was trying to get a career going for five years that was
         | just going to end up nowhere. This might be what I need to get
         | out for good.
        
       | sillysaurusx wrote:
       | > Don't discount the physical aspect of loneliness either. If
       | you're like me, work is the primary shaper of your life. Work
       | gives your life rhythm. It is the gravitational center around
       | which the other activities in your life revolve. Then, one day,
       | poof--it's gone.
       | 
       | Exhibit A of why not to take your day job too seriously. Be
       | professional -- but that's as far as it goes.
       | 
       | > Come up with a more, uh, positive reason for why you're
       | interviewing instead of disclosing that you were laid off.
       | 
       | There's nothing wrong with being laid off. I was, last week. Saw
       | it coming from a mile away. Told my new employer about it.
       | 
       | Here's the secret for getting a job you're happy with. Try to
       | have competing offers. I would have had to take over a 60%
       | reduction in salary if I hadn't had one. But I did, and so it was
       | merely a 37% reduction. I'm very happy with it.
       | 
       | This is an area where I have to give tptacek lots of credit. I
       | sort of shuffled from job to job until he posted this nugget of
       | wisdom, and it's quite true. None of the points in the article
       | applied to me because of a fundamental shift in mindset. It
       | happened around 7 years ago.
       | 
       | I think the loneliness aspect is intertwined with the reason why
       | most people don't try to go interview while you already have a
       | job. You see your job as something more. It's not just a job; it
       | gives your life rhythm.
       | 
       | Maybe so. But in my experience, the way to be happy is not to
       | care so darn much about it. Do a good job. But try to get a
       | better one. And when you're on the market, _try to get multiple_.
       | 
       | The recent thread about the engineer who got their offer
       | rescinded from two different YC companies is exhibit B. They
       | mentioned that they stopped looking for new jobs after things
       | seemed to be going well during the pre-offer phase. Don't do
       | this. You should be doing a breadth-first search of all possible
       | opportunities: talk to as many people as possible, and spend your
       | time weighted by expected outcome.
        
         | p1esk wrote:
         | _it was merely a 37% reduction. I'm very happy with it._
         | 
         | You took 37% paycut and you're happy with it? Why?
        
           | highwaylights wrote:
           | OP didn't take a pay cut. OP's pay was zero.
           | 
           | OP took a job that would provide an income that happened to
           | be 37% less than the one OP had before.
        
             | ulfw wrote:
             | By that argument he could have taken a job at McDonald's
             | flipping burgers and would be better off than 'zero'.
             | 
             | He did take a pay cut. 37% can be felt by anyone earning an
             | income. It's often the decider if you have money left over
             | after living expenses or not.
             | 
             | Let's say you earn 200K. 100k goes away for taxes et al (I
             | am simplifying here), leaving you 100K for expenses. If
             | your living expenses are 60K for rent, food,
             | transportation, fun, family, you can save 40K a year for
             | retirement. Let's say you earn 37% less. That's 126K. 60k
             | goes away for taxes et al (I am simplifying here), leaving
             | you 66K for expenses. If your living expenses are 60K for
             | rent, food, transportation, fun, family, you can save 6K a
             | year for retirement. Your savings just dropped by 85%,
             | putting your retirement in danger.
             | 
             | Not saying OP shouldn't have accepted the offer. But let's
             | not pretend this wasn't a significant pay cut.
        
               | sillysaurusx wrote:
               | It was $400k to $250k. Significant, but given the
               | recession, it's a nice position to be in.
               | 
               | There's a fella on TikTok named Frank Niu. He made $500k
               | at Netflix, and his job was basically to run around
               | fixing things when they broke. It was a nice reminder
               | that the good times can be very good, and the bad times
               | are worth scaling back one's expectations appropriately.
               | I doubt he'd still be in the $500k bracket if he were
               | still working, but you never know.
               | 
               | Also, don't scale your living expenses! It's tempting,
               | but my current employer almost didn't make me an offer
               | because they assumed I was living at a $400k lifestyle.
               | In reality we were just paying off our house and driving
               | the same old car.
        
               | p1esk wrote:
               | But you took the offer within one week from being laid
               | off. You don't feel like you could've gotten a better
               | offer if you waited?
        
           | eat wrote:
           | I'm not the person you're asking, but the answer seems to be
           | quite obvious (unless you think they're lying about being
           | happy about the situation)-- they were making more money than
           | they need by at least 37%.
        
           | rr808 wrote:
           | The last 5-10 years have seen crazy money. I think most of us
           | will see pay cuts sooner or later. Definitely when you get in
           | your 40s+ you're likely to get a pay cut for each new job,
           | unless you're management or architect or similar.
        
           | bumby wrote:
           | They seem to have their loss-aversion in check.
        
         | silvestrov wrote:
         | > Exhibit A of why not to take your day job too seriously.
         | 
         | This can be more difficult when you have been part of
         | transforming a company for 20 years instead of job-hopping
         | every few years. When you have advocated for changes and they
         | have been implemented, there are parts of "you" in the company.
         | 
         | Also the CV looks very empty in this case, even when having
         | implemented many interesting things.
        
         | PragmaticPulp wrote:
         | > Exhibit A of why not to take your day job too seriously. Be
         | professional -- but that's as far as it goes.
         | 
         | I think that's the wrong message to take away from this. The
         | author's problems wouldn't have been solved by remaining more
         | distant from his job and coworkers - he'd just be lonely all of
         | the time!
         | 
         | The real answer is that you need to cultivate relationships and
         | a life outside of work, too. By all means, become friendly with
         | and get to know your coworkers, but don't let work be your
         | _only_ source of relationships.
        
         | gpgn wrote:
         | > This is an area where I have to give tptacek lots of credit.
         | 
         | Any specific thread that might be particularly
         | enlightening/interesting?
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | librish wrote:
         | > Exhibit A of why not to take your day job too seriously. Be
         | professional -- but that's as far as it goes.
         | 
         | People spend 8 hours + lunch and commuting every weekday on
         | their job. It's almost 50% of the time you spend conscious
         | during a week. Most people want more out of that than just a
         | chore that needs to be done.
        
           | dj_mc_merlin wrote:
           | Embrace distributed WFH and you can spend 4 hours in the
           | morning, have a nice picnic, play some basketball, have a
           | couple beers, then retire to your room to do another 4hrs. Or
           | just fuck off some days and counterbalance it by doing hyper
           | focused 12hrs days some other time.
           | 
           | Also: unless you're genuinely curing cancer or flying food to
           | starving African villages or something, 95% of software
           | companies are pretty damn useless and any impact a SWE
           | imagines is basically just a mental fantasy that helps one
           | keep working. No one is genuinely happier because another API
           | is created or some rich person has a better way of managing
           | which products he's selling to other rich people. It's all
           | basically useless and just a way to make money.
        
             | benjaminwootton wrote:
             | That wasn't an option until a few years ago, and it being
             | an option coincided with the crescendo of a 14 year bull
             | market. Having a few beers before your afternoon shift
             | isn't likely to viable for long.
        
               | gabereiser wrote:
               | Exactly. They wonder why there are layoffs and they are
               | one of them. Or like in the article, they think they'll
               | land another gig in 3 months or less.
        
               | satvikpendem wrote:
               | Harsh words, but likely unfounded. You don't know their
               | reason for being laid off, it could be that their company
               | didn't product a profit (since in a bull run they don't
               | need to), it could be that a competitor caught up to
               | them, it could be that their division was no longer
               | needed, and so on. Poor performance attributable to WFH
               | necessarily is not very high on the list of why people
               | are laid off, generally speaking.
        
               | Volundr wrote:
               | Heh TBH in most cases I doubt an individual has much if
               | any control over a) if there are layoffs, and b) if they
               | are part of one. I've had the "privilege" of seeing the
               | internals of a few large layoffs, and being caught in
               | one, and from my experience they are usually tied to
               | business decisions outside of the control of your average
               | IC (currently interests rates are putting a major pinch
               | on companies that hold a lot of debt for example) and
               | performance is rarely an actual factor in who goes. In
               | most the large layoffs I've seen the list of who is going
               | is handed down from C or VP level execs with none of
               | management below having any say (which explains why so
               | many take out key resources). Only in one case have I
               | actually seen managers select who to keep.
               | 
               | The whole "layoffs happen because employees are lazy, and
               | affect lazy employees" is a nice narrative of your a
               | business owner to keep the rank and file "motivated", but
               | it's rarely an accurate portrayal of the situation.
        
               | dj_mc_merlin wrote:
               | Haven't missed a deadline in more than a year, which is
               | more than I can say for most of my coworkers. It turns
               | out that work with a fresh morning brain for 4 hours, a
               | long break, and then later on more work with a refreshed
               | brain is much more efficient than sitting for 8 hrs in an
               | office for no reason.
               | 
               | If I choose to refresh myself via mid-day beer, so what?
               | The code doesn't care how long I sit inside an office. It
               | cares how well my brain works.
               | 
               | (..yes, too much beer and it won't work anymore.
               | Everything in moderation.)
        
             | cahoot_bird wrote:
             | Counter opinion: You're going to be one of many applicant
             | because everyone else is embracing WFH trend too, so you
             | are competing with everyone, especially with some much
             | experience to show, or a portfolio of trending
             | technologies.
             | 
             | It might be that a dev that has a money cushion and is
             | willing and able to relocate can compete on a level others
             | can't because competition would only be localized.
             | 
             | OP was unemployed a year. Time adds up, that's a lot of
             | money.
        
               | dj_mc_merlin wrote:
               | > OP was unemployed a year. Time adds up, that's a lot of
               | money.
               | 
               | Luckily my government gives me a full year of
               | unemployment benefits at 2/3rds of my salary besides my
               | savings. Obviously, I don't wish to test my luck
               | regardless, but not everywhere is as cutthroat as the US.
        
               | kjksf wrote:
               | More accurately: your government takes your money and
               | then, maybe, gives it back to you in the form of
               | unemployment benefits and the like, minus significant
               | processing fees.
               | 
               | The alternative is to use the money the government
               | doesn't take and save it for your future "unemployment
               | benefit".
        
               | dj_mc_merlin wrote:
               | The government would give me more than I would be able to
               | save myself in a year. Over multiple years, I would be
               | able to save more efficiently than the government, true.
               | That's assuming everything goes perfectly however, so I
               | view it as a form of insurance: I make less in order to
               | have less anxiety that I will not be able to provide for
               | myself and my dependents if the overlords decide I am no
               | longer worthy of my job. It's a tradeoff, but one that I
               | will gladly make. As a social good, that money also goes
               | into helping those that were not as lucky as me to be
               | able to make good easy money. And perhaps one day I might
               | be like them too, who knows?
        
           | gabereiser wrote:
           | I think the OP is saying that there's no expectation that the
           | company provide more than what they seek from you. Keeping it
           | professional allows you to compartmentalize the fact that you
           | are there because you add value and nothing more. You can
           | form friendships. You can form guilds/clans/clubs/practices
           | within. You can provide culture and mentorship beyond the
           | duty of the role. At the end of the day though, it's not a
           | day care and you are there to provide value to the business
           | objectives. My professional colleagues I deeply respect. My
           | friends are sometimes idiots. That's how I see it.
        
           | scarface74 wrote:
           | Work is exclusively a method for me to exchange labor for
           | money to support my addiction to food and shelter.
        
           | willio58 wrote:
           | I think there's a benefit for some people in letting go a
           | bit. Even if you love your job, you need to understand that
           | the system we work in is purpose-built to exploit workers.
           | It's great to be focused on your work when you're working,
           | but once you're done for the day you should unplug as much as
           | you can. Taking PTO? Don't check slack or emails.
           | 
           | I love what I do, but I've found that even still if I let
           | that fact convince me to work more than what is required of
           | me I will eventually feel burnt out and eventually depressed.
           | Maybe this isn't the case for everyone, but it's life outside
           | of work that brings true meaning and purpose to my life. Time
           | with friends and loved ones, going outside into nature and
           | having new experiences, these are all things that make me
           | actually happy. Loving my work just means I'm not sad when
           | I'm at work.
        
         | ufmace wrote:
         | > Exhibit A of why not to take your day job too seriously. Be
         | professional -- but that's as far as it goes.
         | 
         | +1 on this. His #1 is exactly why you should not let work, and
         | especially work social events, become the "primary shaper of
         | your life" - they can and will get rid of you anytime they
         | think it might be convenient for them. It may not have anything
         | to do with your skills or productivity, it may be just what
         | someone high above you felt like doing for reasons that have
         | nothing to do with you.
        
         | anon50118810 wrote:
         | Being spoiled for choice with offers is great if you can manage
         | it, but not very useful if you're OP who couldn't find
         | something for a year.
         | 
         | Also, having a job gives you a basic social identity to use to
         | interact with people, and positive cash flow lets you be
         | expansive and outgoing. It's very easy to take this for
         | granted, or assume focusing on work is ultra-materialist, if
         | you don't have a lot of experience going without. I agree that
         | it's healthy to not worry so much about the day-to-day minutiae
         | of a specific job, but this is a lot different from the
         | inevitable decline that comes with not having any job at all.
        
           | prismatix wrote:
           | Also, if you can't find a job in a year then maybe you need
           | to lower your standards somewhere. Even as a self-taught,
           | very junior (at the time) engineer it only took me 4 months
           | to receive (competitive) competing offers.
        
           | bumby wrote:
           | > _a job gives you a basic social identity_
           | 
           | Just because this is a norm doesn't make it healthy. When
           | your identity is rooted in something that can easily go away,
           | it makes for a weak foundation. Lot of examples of jobs that
           | are relatively short-lived (athletes, military, etc.) can
           | show how difficult transitioning is when your identity is
           | tied to your job.
        
             | anon50118810 wrote:
             | We need to distinguish between being at some particular job
             | and being in a profession or similarly in any job at all.
             | 
             | I think it's unhealthy to have your identity tied to your
             | specific employer, job title and tasks that you do for
             | them. You as a person should not be defined by the tickets
             | in your current sprint.
             | 
             | However not having a profession or any job is much
             | different and worse. Unless you're older and retired, or
             | independently wealthy, then it means you're going to cut
             | back on everything. You won't socialize with other people
             | society deems successful, you won't date, you won't grow a
             | family, you won't travel or do anything other than continue
             | to exist. All parts of your situation will shrink and
             | decline. You are running out the clock toward total
             | destitution.
             | 
             | I'm making this point because it's easy for people who are
             | having a successful career to say, oh, of course I'm not my
             | job, while missing entirely that they see themselves as a
             | person who has a good job and will likely get another good
             | job if their current job ends. They don't mean that they
             | see themselves equally as a software developer or a
             | dishwasher or on the street and it's all the same to them,
             | so sharing the perspective that you are not your job in a
             | discussion about extended unemployment is maybe not very
             | appropriate.
             | 
             | Whether this latter reality is healthy or not, I don't
             | know, but people have identified themselves as successful
             | based on their trade or other social categorization for
             | thousands of years, so at least we can say it's not new.
        
               | bumby wrote:
               | Part of the distinction I was trying to make is that it's
               | dangerous to have one's identity tied primarily to any
               | singular thing. In western culture, it just seems like a
               | job/profession is the easiest identifier.
               | 
               | Will Storr writes about this much better than I can
               | explain it here. But his point is essentially that the
               | healthiest approach is to have your identity tied to many
               | disparate parts of your life so that if one falters, the
               | way you view your status doesn't hinge on that one
               | failure. Just like you stated that "people identified
               | themselves as successful", is a measure of status. If
               | your esteem/status is based on that one domain, you're
               | putting yourself at greater risk. It doesn't matter if a
               | buggy-whip maker was the best tradesman around, he's
               | status is still at risk when cars become popular.
               | 
               | The other part is that I believe research shows it's
               | typically unhealthy to have one's social circle centered
               | around work because those aren't very tight bonds. Again,
               | it's a point to spread your social circle across shared
               | interests and values rather than a job.
        
               | anon50118810 wrote:
               | What I'm really talking about when I'm talking about the
               | threat of extended unemployment is the threat of losing
               | socioeconomic class. So much depends on class: where you
               | live, what you eat, where you worship if anywhere, where
               | your kids go to school, who your friends are. Almost
               | everything. It's very difficult to diversify your social
               | and professional network outside of your class.
               | 
               | In most cases switching from one tech job to another will
               | keep you in the same middle-to-upper-middle class even if
               | you have to take a relatively large pay cut. You can even
               | lose your job without something else lined up and it's
               | not a big problem as long as you're confident you'll find
               | something similar soon.
               | 
               | All of that is at risk with extended unemployment or
               | being forced to indefinitely work for lower pay in a
               | different field. Consider all the life changes someone
               | might have to make if they have to change from being a
               | software developer making $150k to being a rideshare
               | driver making $40k, after six months, a year, or five
               | years. I don't know about buggy-whip makers but probably
               | they'd be okay with losing their jobs if they were
               | guaranteed equal work in the new car factories. What they
               | really dreaded was having to work for less pay in the new
               | factories, or becoming day laborers or similar. This is
               | what motivated the original Luddites.
        
       | ptkanchi wrote:
       | Getting laid off absolutely sucks and it could potentially happen
       | to anyone, thus it's important everyone has some sort of nest
       | egg.
       | 
       | And please... network, network, network! I know not everyone has
       | this opportunity, but if you leave a good lasting impression and
       | make friends with strong coworkers, over time they will get
       | promoted to higher and higher positions making it incredibly
       | easier to find a job when needed.
        
       | wklm wrote:
       | > when all the talking heads were saying a recession was
       | inevitable. Sound familiar?
       | 
       | This is the very same recession we've been talking about :)
        
       | oldstrangers wrote:
       | Getting laid off is a great introduction into class solidarity
       | with your fellow workers. We have literally nothing in common
       | with the capitalists at the top. You are closer to homelessness
       | than you are to being a billionaire.
        
         | bilvar wrote:
         | Most capitalists are not billionaires or even millionaires, the
         | divide you are creating is outdated and frankly asinine.
        
           | oldstrangers wrote:
           | Reading your other comments, you've aggressively decided to
           | dismiss the historical definition of the capitalist class
           | because it doesn't suit your worldview. In that case there's
           | essentially no conversation to be had because you're already
           | operating from an alternative reality.
        
             | bilvar wrote:
             | Why do you think that Marx's definition of capitalist is
             | the 'historical definition'? The term predates Marx.
             | 
             | Moreover, words progressively change definitions depending
             | on cultural and intellectual trends.
        
               | oldstrangers wrote:
               | Because... I wrote the comment, and in the context of my
               | comment, I am referring to the traditional idea of a
               | "capitalist class". There's also no new revised
               | understanding of "capitalists" that includes everyone
               | with a small business. Even in "21st century economics",
               | a capitalist is still traditionally considered someone
               | who owns the means of production at the absolute top of
               | the supply chain (the owners and controllers of capital).
               | Your local grocery story owner is still literally buying
               | his inventory from a supplier. You follow that supply
               | chain long enough, there's more than likely a billionaire
               | at the end of it. That's the actual capitalist.
        
               | bilvar wrote:
               | Again, a capitalist is someone who deploys capital to
               | provide a product or service. Not someone who is at the
               | top of a supply chain. This is only the definition in
               | Marxian 19th century economic theories. Saying that it's
               | the historical definition shows lack of intellectual
               | diversification.
               | 
               | Supplying yourself X & Y goods from the market to produce
               | Z good or service does not make you a labourer. By that
               | logic is someone who owns a car factory NOT a capitalist
               | because he needs to supply himself steel from another
               | capitalist whose factories produce steel? Or is the steel
               | factory owner NOT a capitalist because he needs to
               | provide himself with tools from another capitalist? That
               | makes completely no sense.
        
               | oldstrangers wrote:
               | You're saying a lot to say nothing, while being wildly
               | incorrect with anything you do say. That's pretty
               | impressive, considering you could just google your way
               | out of this ignorance. Anyway, enjoy your alternate
               | reality.
        
               | bilvar wrote:
               | Classic Marxist response when it's demonstrated that
               | their logic produces 1+1=3. Talk about alternative
               | realities :)
        
               | oldstrangers wrote:
               | It's pretty hilarious that you've managed to mention Marx
               | multiple times and throw in an "extreme left-wing echo
               | chamber" unprovoked. Turn off the Fox News buddy, take a
               | deep breath. The woke cancel culture isn't out to get you
               | and the government isn't trying to implant chips in your
               | arm.
        
               | bilvar wrote:
               | Commenter: _Spouts Marxist drivel_
               | 
               | Reply: _Points out that the Marxist drivel is drivel_
               | 
               | Commenter: _Suprised Pikachu face_ "You must be watching
               | too much Fox News to be bringing up Marx !11!!1" (No
               | matter I don't even have Fox News in my country, being
               | from ex-Soviet block, but that's Americans for you). And
               | what's wokeness and government wanting to implant chips
               | have to do with Marxism? You seem a bit confused.
               | 
               | Anyway, very banal reaction, mostly inducing a yawn.
               | 
               | But no worries, keep the meltdown you're having for
               | everyone to see.
        
               | oldstrangers wrote:
               | My buddy, you're literally writing in memes... You need
               | to get a hold of yourself.
        
           | dragonwriter wrote:
           | > Most capitalists are not billionaires or even millionaires,
           | 
           | Yes, they are, if one is referring to the capitalist _class_
           | (the haut bourgeoisie), those who relate to the economy
           | primarily through capital to which other's rented labor is
           | applied, not "everyone with some, however incidental,
           | capital". Heck, even most of the middle class (petit
           | bourgeoisie, who either apply their own labor to their own
           | capital or who otherwise are supported significantly by both
           | labor and capital) are at least millionaires. The working
           | class, who obligatorily depend on renting out their labor to
           | capitalists may have some incidental capital and not be
           | millionaires, but they very much are not capitalists.
        
             | bilvar wrote:
             | I'm referring to the capitalists as thought of in 21st
             | century economics, not some outdated 19th century
             | Marxist/extreme left-wing echo chamber (lol, 'haute
             | bourgeoisie', are you even listening to yourself?). People
             | who deploy and risk their capital to produce services or
             | products are capitalists. e.g My local grocer is a
             | capitalist or my grandfather running a family farm is a
             | capitalist. I can tell you for sure my grandfather is not a
             | millionaire, I'm not so sure about my local grocer, but I
             | doubt it.
        
       | SergeAx wrote:
       | I was laid off 3 times in my almost 30 years career. Every time
       | it was difficult experiences, but I got some lessons from that.
       | 
       | I still member of two active "ex-..." communities. Those are most
       | helpful and useful, especially when other people are getting
       | there after me and it was a perfect cause to get back in touch,
       | meet for drinks or get back on track with common hobby.
       | 
       | After first one I always open my piggy bank and do the things I
       | wanted for a long time but had no time to do. Like getting a
       | sailboat skipper licence and do a couple of gigs like deckhand on
       | a voyage, repair or long haul. Or travel for a distant
       | destination for a month.
       | 
       | Time between jobs is always great to get in touch with own body
       | and mind, like doing a health checkup or visit short-term
       | psychology group.
       | 
       | And of course it is a perfect time to spend more time with
       | parents, relatives and friends.
        
       | octobus2021 wrote:
       | Was laid off in March 2020 (senior dev/lead), took 1.5 years to
       | find another job. Share author's disbelief in "job market in
       | unbelievably strong", "people quit jobs because they are unhappy
       | and hop to better positions", "employers cannot have enough IT
       | workers" and similar statements.
       | 
       | By extension wondering how accurate overall job market statistics
       | are; "Employers are scrambling to find workers" while layoffs
       | have been in full swing for months now.
        
       | hcks wrote:
       | This person doesn't sounds neither professional nor very
       | talented, no wonder it took them a year to get back on tracks.
        
       | mustafabisic1 wrote:
       | Happy it worked out for you. I had a similar experience only my
       | wife had just gotten pregnant with my second child.
       | 
       | That game me urgency like crazy and with a bit of luck I found my
       | dream job in 3 months.
       | 
       | I agree with everything you've mentioned but the biggest +1 for
       | me is that it's lonely. I'd add that all job searches are lonely
       | in my experience.
        
       | [deleted]
        
       | bickett wrote:
       | This is a high interest rate phenomenon. They'd be writing a very
       | different article if written in July 2021.
        
       | tester756 wrote:
       | >You're going to have to grind Leetcode. Yes, even the dynamic
       | programming problems.
       | 
       | Why there isn't this much problem with having to learn yet
       | another JS framework,
       | 
       | get familiarity with database of the month, learn some tool like
       | docker/k8s/ansible/vagrant/blabla or yet another proprietary
       | toolchain like AWS/Azure/GCP
       | 
       | but foundational cs/programming knowledge is top hated thing,
       | that people even call it "discriminatory for people with
       | families" or something like that
        
         | paulryanrogers wrote:
         | My feeling is that the fundamentals are difficult in their own
         | way: requiring math, logic, creativity, seemingly arbitrary
         | constraints. Learning the flavor of the month on stack X is
         | often just learning their jargon, keywords, and matching common
         | patterns one probably already knows.
         | 
         | All that said, sentiment against stack churn is significant and
         | a common theme here on HN.
        
         | weakfortress wrote:
         | Because after a successful, productive, 5-10 years at a company
         | you tend to forget the algorithms you don't use. I can remember
         | enough about the knapsack problem to talk intelligently about
         | it. I can't remember how to do the dynamic programming. In 90%
         | of cases given infinite time I can eventually arrive at the
         | solution to most med-hard questions. However, you don't have
         | infinite time. I find problems like optimizing how much water
         | goes into buckets to the point I can solve it in 4 minutes with
         | variations so far below me it doesn't even register on my
         | radar. For the record, I have over a decade in this industry.
         | Having to do these problems makes me feel like that hard earned
         | decade may as well had not happened.
         | 
         | For those of us with lives, hobbies, etc grinding leetcode is
         | exhausting. Moreover, you can't just grind it. You have to
         | grind it to the point you literally can brain dump answers in
         | an interview.
         | 
         | Interviewers rarely care about your accomplishments. No one
         | cares you did staff eng. at XYZ, managed engineers, have
         | familiarity with all sorts of frameworks, etc. This is the only
         | industry where every time you look for a job you're treated
         | like don't have a resume. I think many (if not most) people are
         | insulted by this because the people in charge are belittling
         | them. I would bet even Knuth would struggle to tackle a modern
         | programming interview. That's a problem.
        
           | anon50118810 wrote:
           | In my experience you're overstating the need to be able to
           | instantly brain dump complex algorithms, except maybe at the
           | FAANG level where I have no experience. It's far more
           | important to be comfortable solving any simple coding
           | challenge on demand in front of people in a high-stakes
           | situation like an interview.
        
         | throwawaysleep wrote:
         | Because companies tend to let you learn those on the job.
         | Nobody complains if I don't quite know Flask in interviews if I
         | know Django. Certainly nobody cares if you know the details
         | inside out or want to refer to docs.
         | 
         | Algos is a skill you do not use on the job and companies are
         | extremely picky about you getting the correct answer.
        
           | tester756 wrote:
           | How can you use algos if you aren't aware which places in
           | your code you could significantly improve if you had that
           | algo intuition?
        
             | rajin444 wrote:
             | You're hired for your problem solving ability which
             | includes being able to learn and apply specific algorithms
             | if needed.
             | 
             | Asking questions that chat GPT can easily answer gives 0
             | insight into problem solving ability.
        
               | tester756 wrote:
               | Sounds cool in theory, but the question stands
               | 
               | How are you going to improve existing codebase / new code
               | if you aren't aware of the foundations, tools and basic
               | primitives?
               | 
               | How many problems could be solved by just usage of z3 if
               | you were aware of it?
               | 
               | How many problems could be solved by applying most
               | popular combinatorial optimization methods/approaches
               | 
               | instead of writing something times, times slower, but
               | eventually hacked enough to make it work?
        
               | eropple wrote:
               | You're assuming that that awareness of how to solve a
               | problem and immediate hands-on-keyboard test for
               | materially different success rates while actually
               | employed. My experience is that by the time you've gotten
               | the job, most of the crammed-in Leetcode specifics have
               | leaked back out and you're in the same place as somebody
               | who knows the thing from school or from using it in prior
               | projects, but didn't have it in their fingertips during
               | the interview--you're looking it up again, because you
               | know what you need but don't have the details top-of-
               | mind.
               | 
               | The insistence on being able to spew out code-first
               | answers to contrived problems during an interview
               | situation is silly gatekeeping, but it makes the people
               | who pass _feel good_ , and that's why it persists.
        
               | projectazorian wrote:
               | For 99% of the roles out there, needing to drop into
               | algorithms all the time is an anti pattern that
               | demonstrates lack of knowledge of your tech stack. I've
               | had to clean up a lot of code written by people who
               | wanted to show off their algo knowledge to solve a
               | problem that should have been addressed with a few lines
               | of SQL.
        
       | kowlo wrote:
       | I had this article left on my screen to read after making a cup
       | of tea. Wife was a bit confused, she'd only read "8 Hard Truths I
       | learned when I got laid"...
        
       | Octokiddie wrote:
       | > Companies may be looking to reset expectations around
       | compensation and working conditions. Offers are extended, but
       | with extremely unpalatable terms compared to prior jobs. For
       | unsavvy candidates, this won't become apparent until late in the
       | interview process.
       | 
       | This seems like something that will become especially prevalent
       | this time around given the much higher level to which salaries
       | were pushed during the bubble.
        
       | devmor wrote:
       | I've survived several layoffs, a couple firings and a couple
       | quittings and I don't really identify with much of what the
       | author says here in any of these situations.
       | 
       | I've never considered leaving a job for any reason to be
       | "lonely", nor does it take very long to find another position
       | that suits me well. If I let one of the recruiters I talk to know
       | that I'm looking for work, I've usually got multiple interviews
       | within 3-5 days.
       | 
       | The only thing I'd really agree with is the bit about honesty and
       | transparency - I've definitely been a bit too honest about my
       | faults before and it's cost me an interview or two.
       | 
       | I don't know if I'm an odd duck, or the author is just very poor
       | at networking - but it seems like the latter to me.
        
       | ummonk wrote:
       | I don't understand the thinking behind #7, especially when it
       | contradicts #2-#4... Surely if the job market is so tight, it
       | might be worthwhile to take what jobs you can get?
        
       | jorblumesea wrote:
       | This is why people do LC problems daily and interview regularly.
       | You will find that you need to constantly play the game if you
       | want to stay in the game. It's a sliding scale of preparedness.
       | Those out of step with the interview meta and out of practice
       | will find it more painful.
       | 
       | The biggest mistake is losing your job, then having to prep to
       | get a new one.
        
         | clutchdude wrote:
         | Biggest mistake is thinking you have to grind in leetcode
         | outside of work to edge out others.
         | 
         | If your job right now isn't preparing you for your next job,
         | then you are in the wrong job.
        
       | zer00eyz wrote:
       | I survived the dot com crash (yes I'm old).
       | 
       | I have hired (interviewing team member, or hiring manager)
       | hundreds of engineers.
       | 
       | If you are hearing "let me know if I can help" (number 5) you
       | might be doing something wrong. You should be hearing some
       | version of " I will talk to my boss" or "I will call for you" or
       | "XXX person I know is looking".
       | 
       | I have a list of about 30 people who if they call me I'm going to
       | go out of my way to get them a job. That means make a spot for
       | them on my team. Or I will reach into the non overlapping parts
       | of our networks to see if someone is hiring.
       | 
       | Im going to do this because they are good, because they don't
       | suck, because they will get the job done. They will make me look
       | good as the person who brought them in/onboard.
       | 
       | Those of us who survived the bubble did so on hard work and a
       | network. We brought along the people we thought were the best,
       | who we got along with, who would get the job done.
       | 
       | Its the new year, it is the perfect excuse to figure out who your
       | network is, and what they can do for you. Make a list of folks
       | you know, call them up, tell them your thinking of changing jobs.
       | If you don't hear a lot of "send me your resume"/"is your
       | linked/site in up to date" then you need to make some changes.
        
         | atkailash wrote:
         | This is very generational and depends on what sort of work
         | circle you're in too. There's people I know would do this sort
         | of thing for me but they literally couldn't. This sounds like
         | the equivalent of "hit the pavement with your resume" advice
        
         | 300bps wrote:
         | I thrived in the dotcom crash while I watched many of my
         | friends go to companies with generic names like "Global Digital
         | Media" with silly business plans like putting Internet kiosks
         | in U.S. airports. It was incredible - their entire business
         | plan was to ramp up over the next 5 years with a massive
         | capital outlay just in time for smart phones to make them
         | completely obsolete. This is an actual example:
         | 
         | https://www.nytimes.com/2001/02/22/technology/the-web-withou...
         | 
         | I thrived by staying put. I got retention bonuses while my
         | friends got tons of equity in companies that became 0. When
         | they lowered their salaries to conserve money, they gave them
         | more equity to compensate. Again, all the equity became 0.
         | 
         | Everything you said about networking is spot on. I would add to
         | it - don't waste time. Don't think, "I'm going to ride on my
         | severance and unemployment for six months and start on x date."
         | Start literally today. If it's the holidays and nobody is
         | hiring, get a certification. Learn a new technology. Work on
         | networking. Exercise. Do 8 hours of productive _something_
         | every day.
         | 
         | I have a friend who has been unemployed the last 2.5 years. He
         | now wishes he didn't take a year off without improving himself
         | / looking for a job.
        
           | ghaff wrote:
           | >I would add to it - don't waste time.
           | 
           | In the dotcom crash, when I was laid off I think the first
           | email I sent the next day was to someone who we were a client
           | of at a previous employer. And we had stayed in touch because
           | I had moved onto a competitor of his (until I was laid off).
           | Just a "Hey. I was laid off. Love to pick your brain." sort
           | of thing. Took me out to lunch with his COO the next week.
           | Discussed some contracting but they ended up making me an
           | offer in about of month.
           | 
           | Things got rocky for the company later. And it was touch and
           | go for a bit. Not the greatest period for me financially but
           | I was never really unemployed and it was a pretty great job
           | in a lot of ways which set me up for my current one. Had I
           | decided to take the autumn off, I could easily see myself
           | being unemployed for 2 or 3 years. Other people I knew never
           | really recovered from the dotcom bubble bursting.
        
         | adamzerner wrote:
         | This advice boils down to "be the best of the best" because
         | you'd only go out of your way for someone if they're that good.
         | 
         | I don't think people who haven't reached that bar are
         | necessarily doing something "wrong". It takes hard work to
         | reach it and some people prioritize other things in life over
         | hustling. Others simply don't have the talent to reach it.
        
         | xyzelement wrote:
         | Mainly agree, but maybe can be a bit more generous.
         | 
         | "30" sounds low to me, having worked in large companies for
         | many years. Sure, the number of people you worked super-closely
         | with for years is maybe in double digits but you probably know
         | a lot of other people by reputation (which is still good
         | signal) and there may be low effort things you can do for them.
         | I try to, anyway.
        
         | kelnos wrote:
         | > _Im going to do this because they are good, because they don
         | 't suck, because they will get the job done. They will make me
         | look good as the person who brought them in/onboard._
         | 
         | This maybe makes sense from a hiring manager's perspective, but
         | I think a lot of the people who say "let me know if I can help"
         | are non-management peers. At most companies, the best they can
         | do is enter their recently-laid-off colleagues information and
         | resume into the internal referral system. Yes, that's usually
         | better than going in through the "random applicant from the
         | internet" funnel, but it's still limited. Even if they have a
         | good relationship with the hiring manager, often the applicant
         | still has to go through the funnel, and it's easy to get lost
         | there. This usually isn't an issue with smaller companies that
         | have less process, though.
         | 
         | Regardless, on the few occasions where I (as a non-manager)
         | have referred someone and they've been hired, I don't think it
         | gave me much of a reputation boost as someone who brought
         | someone good onboard. Regardless, there are certainly some
         | people for whom I'd go above and beyond to try to help them get
         | an interview, but I'd do that because they are close friends
         | whom I want to help, not because I of any professional perks of
         | successfully referring someone, which I absolutely don't care
         | about.
        
           | zer00eyz wrote:
           | I wrote the comment your replying to...
           | 
           | > This maybe makes sense from a hiring manager's perspective,
           | but I think a lot of the people who say "let me know if I can
           | help" are non-management peers.
           | 
           | A good number of my management gigs were PEERS hiring me in
           | as a fellow engineer, and me getting promoted to be their
           | boss. Much of the hiring I have done is peers of the good
           | engineers on my team. If your peers think your great, that
           | your going to make them look good by doing well then your
           | name will come up.
           | 
           | Every manager is different, "hire this person" with some sort
           | of resume is going to get my attention! Your peer can do that
           | for you!
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | w10-1 wrote:
         | "We brought along the people we thought were the best, who we
         | got along with, who would get the job done"
         | 
         | I really appreciate the sentiment. In my experience such
         | networks have been self-serving and mostly exclusionary,
         | rewarding loyalty more than competence.
         | 
         | "You need to make some changes" is not particularly helpful
         | when you're outside the fold. What's typically unstated is
         | something about loyalty, esp. not disclosing the mistakes of
         | others.
         | 
         | The best advice someone could give?
         | 
         | 1. Achieve impressive things
         | 
         | 2. Never give anyone a reason to dislike you
        
           | beckingz wrote:
           | That's pretty good advice. Get stuff done and be likable is
           | good.
        
             | Arisaka1 wrote:
             | I have a colleague who almost feels like he's actively
             | trying to make me hate him by throwing completely unrelated
             | to work off-hand remarks in the most basic thing I do, like
             | telling people that I'm gonna take a lunch break or just
             | opening up a terminal prompt while we pair program.
             | 
             | I know it's off-topic but It's hard for me to try to be
             | likeable with people who are actively trying stuff like
             | that, and I don't know what else to do. It feels like I'm
             | sitting on a table and the other side ignores their table
             | manners because they're just that valuable to the company
             | that they can.
        
               | sokoloff wrote:
               | I think I don't fully understand the opening up a
               | terminal prompt part of that comment.
        
               | eric-hu wrote:
               | Not the one or replying to, but I've encountered this
               | too. Some pair programming takes the form of two people
               | operating one computer. When I've done this style and I'm
               | driving, certain people wouldn't let me finish my thought
               | on what I'm doing. They'll grab their keyboard or mouse
               | and change programs, or just start typing in stuff while
               | I'm typing too.
        
               | programmarchy wrote:
               | Have you told this person what they're doing bothers you
               | and asked them to stop? If you haven't, then you are
               | partially to blame for not speaking up for yourself. Good
               | opportunity for you to learn how to tactfully set
               | boundaries with people.
        
           | warkdarrior wrote:
           | I think you are discounting the social aspect of the advice.
           | Most people do great things, but very few can stand out only
           | on the strength of their work. So for the vast majority doing
           | good work has to be coupled with having a network that knows
           | about one's work.
           | 
           | And frankly looking for a job is probably one of the most
           | self-serving efforts in one's life, by definition. That is a
           | good thing.
        
           | 908B64B197 wrote:
           | Something I noticed in tech is that loyalty is generally a
           | consequence of competence.
           | 
           | If competent people are valued, recognized and promoted that
           | leads to more interesting projects and compensation. That's
           | how you build loyalty.
           | 
           | We all know software shops that are always whining about the
           | "tech talent shortage" and whose technical employees don't
           | stay more than two years. And we know why nobody is loyal to
           | those!
        
           | [deleted]
        
           | parineum wrote:
           | > In my experience such networks have been self-serving and
           | mostly exclusionary, rewarding loyalty more than competence.
           | 
           | I think that's all true except for the "more than competence"
           | part and it's a good thing. Competence is directly related to
           | loyalty. When you recommend someone for a job and they excel,
           | it makes you look good. It makes you loyal to them and giving
           | the opportunity makes them more loyal to you. If someone
           | isn't recommended you for job openings they know about, it's
           | because they think you might make them look bad, either
           | through experience with you or the lack thereof.
           | Unfortunately, it takes time to prove you're competent and
           | gain that loyalty.
           | 
           | Sometimes nepotism can creep in and someone can use their
           | influence to get someone under qualified into a position they
           | shouldn't but that influence was, generally, built through
           | competence, including a history of recommended qualified and
           | competent people.
           | 
           | > The best advice someone could give? > 1. Achieve impressive
           | things > 2. Never give anyone a reason to dislike you
           | 
           | I think the real advice is be reliable and don't be abrasive.
           | A recommendation for a position goes a long way because it
           | alleviates the risk of hiring an unknown person that may be
           | unreliable or not be able to work with other people.
        
             | whoIsYou wrote:
             | Seconding this. I'm wondering if the person you are
             | replying to might be having a bit of a dunning kruger issue
             | 
             | I only recommend the people that I have worked with that I
             | would want to work with again. Not because of loyalty, but
             | because they are good, and will make me look good for
             | recommending them
        
           | sokoloff wrote:
           | The people whom I'd recommend are not on the basis of loyalty
           | but rather on some dot product of competence and
           | willingness/propensity to do hard work.
           | 
           | It's true that a network referral will inherently be of
           | someone that I worked with (or have other [rare] reason to
           | vouch for). That's the value of it: if you know me enough to
           | trust my judgment, that vouch has information value for you.
           | 
           | I don't see any other way it could work more effectively.
        
           | mtc010170 wrote:
           | > 2. Never give anyone a reason to dislike you
           | 
           | I'm someone who tends to get along and work well with others.
           | That part definitely has its advantages for employability
           | (and life in general), and is recommended. However, taking it
           | to this extreme is just dangerous advice. Constantly being a
           | people pleaser can carry enormous risks, especially (but not
           | limited to) to yourself. It's important to learn to be ok
           | with people disliking you sometimes.
        
             | ferrumfist wrote:
             | People pleasers can cause people to dislike them in a
             | workplace, ironically. Being a people pleaser in software
             | dev very often means you will over-burden yourself because
             | you'd rather say "yes, I can do that for you" than "no, I
             | don't have the bandwidth for that".
             | 
             | I'd rather a teammate who is honest about their current
             | limitations than someone who tells me what I want to hear.
             | If someone admits they are stretched thin, it's now an "us
             | versus the problem" to find why you are so overtasked. If
             | someone consistently takes on too much (because they can't
             | say no) and causes the team to miss deadlines, it's now an
             | "us versus you" problem.
        
             | brailsafe wrote:
             | Everyone has different and possibly ridiculous
             | expectations;w whether they dislike you or not is not
             | really within your control.
             | 
             | Edit: I'd maybe clarify that trying to get people above you
             | not to dislike you is essentially the nature the politics
             | of careerist ladder climbing. If you get laid off, it's
             | just pretty common for people to see themselves as
             | inherently superior because they weren't let go, and
             | therefore think, right or wrong, that you'll reflect poorly
             | on them, because they're careerist ladder climbers. So
             | maybe it's best to carefully cultivate the people from the
             | very start of meeting them which ones still have souls.
        
           | marcinzm wrote:
           | >In my experience such networks have been self-serving and
           | mostly exclusionary, rewarding loyalty more than competence.
           | 
           | The point being? That is how human social network and
           | constructs work. The ultimate point is to help yourself and
           | not based on some ephemeral grand concept. No matter how
           | competent someone is why would I want to work with them if
           | they will stab me in the back one day? Incompetent people
           | will indirectly stab you in the back eventually so you really
           | want an adequate level of competence and loyalty.
           | 
           | Dislike and loyalty are also very different things so not
           | sure why you're equating them. There's people who do things I
           | dislike that will support others that support them. There are
           | people I like greatly who have a record of stabbing others in
           | the back even if they were helped by that person. Guess which
           | ones I'd recommend for a job?
        
             | naasking wrote:
             | Loyalty is not a quality that should be selected for.
             | Someone could be "stabbing you in the back" because you're
             | doing something wrong, either morally or because your
             | choices are not good for the business, which is ostensibly
             | what you both should be working towards. Demanding or
             | expecting loyalty blinds you to important signals.
             | 
             | Loyalty is a huge failure of human reasoning, and it's
             | frankly bizarre that people see it as a moral virtue given
             | how easily it can be and has been exploited in the past.
        
       | jt2190 wrote:
       | > Come up with a more, uh, positive reason for why you're
       | interviewing instead of disclosing that you were laid off.
       | 
       | I don't understand this assertion, unless "laid off" now means
       | "fired with cause". People are laid off all the time, for no
       | reason other than the company wants to reduce their labor costs.
       | 
       | Perhaps the author is _assuming_ that the company is also making
       | a judgement about their skills, e.g. that they're somehow not up
       | to some arbitrary standard? (I think that it is very easy to make
       | this assumption, especially when laid off the first time.)
       | 
       | Anyway, there should be no need to give a potential employer a
       | reason about why you were let go other than the position was
       | eliminated.
        
         | ejb999 wrote:
         | yes and no - unless companies laid off everybody, or an entire
         | division/location for example, they already made some sort of
         | decision on who would stay and who would go - if you find
         | yourself in the 'let go' category, than someone likely made a
         | judgement about you already and found you less desirable than
         | the 'keep' category - thats just the unfortunate reality.
        
           | jt2190 wrote:
           | > ... than someone likely made a judgement...
           | 
           | Of course someone made a judgement, you just don't know what
           | criteria they used, so it could be anything from "didn't like
           | his face" all the way to "had the highest salary".
           | 
           | Furthermore, how does it help in any way to assume that the
           | reason for the layoff was because of a personal shortcoming?
           | And why should we assume _in advance and without evidence_
           | that a potential employer won 't consider us because of this?
        
           | geekbird wrote:
           | IME it's arbitrary criteria - either last hired, first fired,
           | or most expensive people, or older people (illegal, but they
           | use other proxies for age to hide it), or most of a division
           | because they're pivoting/no profitable, or you don't want to
           | work 100 hour weeks sitting on the floor near your new CEOs
           | office, or...
           | 
           | Getting laid off from some places is a badge of honor, IMO.
        
           | anon50118810 wrote:
           | "Laid off" should be one of the safest reasons to give for
           | leaving an employer, right up there with giving birth to a
           | child or taking care of a sick loved one. Layoffs from big
           | companies are in the news now and there's rumors about how
           | employees were chosen, but by and large saying you were laid
           | off from some random company shouldn't mean anything other
           | than that employer restructured and you had bad luck.
           | Certainly you as a job applicant are under no obligation to
           | speculate during an interview about why you specifically were
           | let go.
        
       | granshaw wrote:
       | OP is a really good writer / articulator and I found this to be a
       | great piece - with that in mind the fact that he took a full year
       | to find something tells me he must've had red flags elsewhere, or
       | was just really fussy or had a high bar?
        
       | nvarsj wrote:
       | I was laid off in 2010 and I can relate with a lot of these
       | points. Especially how long it took me to find a new job. Despite
       | what I thought was a great CV it took me nearly 6 months. I
       | thought I'd find a job easily when I got laid off.
       | 
       | It was an incredibly humbling experience - reaching out to tens
       | of companies and barely getting any responses. Took me 3 months
       | to just secure my first on-site.
       | 
       | I've generally always gotten jobs from reach outs while employed
       | - making me feel special - when in reality it was my skills
       | simply lining up with some open headcount at that time.
       | 
       | When you're laid off suddenly it's a whole different ballgame.
       | It's largely luck trying to find matching roles with open
       | headcount. In a downturn this is especially rough (like now).
       | 
       | It taught me some things: don't stay anywhere too long (it
       | restricts your network), make sure your skills are not too niche,
       | and ensure you are following industry trends so you remain widely
       | employable.
        
       | jchw wrote:
       | Regarding #6: I've found through experimentation that it's
       | totally OK for me to just be opaque about my identity online. I'm
       | not anonymous at all, just that if a prospective employer were to
       | Google me, they'd not find my meager internet presence. It's not
       | that I'm hiding anything, but in the spirit of #6, not hiding
       | something doesn't mean you have to advertise it either. I've
       | never had an employer give enough of a shit to see my social
       | media accounts. And while I admit this is probably a position of
       | privilege in some ways, I feel like almost anyone in SWE or
       | wanting to get into SWE is better off this way anyways.
       | 
       | Again, it's not about deception. If I were asked, I'd say I don't
       | have any professional internet presence (which is true, I don't.
       | This is me as a person here, not me as an employee.) I of course
       | will link my GitHub, but links from my internet presence only
       | point in the direction of my GitHub, and not the other way
       | around. So if you were really curious, you could dig. Nobody
       | cares to do that, though. I think employers that search are
       | mostly just looking for blatant red flags to try to simplify
       | their lives, and thus it's mutually beneficial to keep a lower
       | profile online even if you don't do anything wrong.
       | 
       | Of course, in my case, it also helps to have a super common name
       | :) But still. Being "just" a pseudonym most places is fine.
        
         | chinabot wrote:
         | Though I don't actively hide my presence on-line as my
         | professional email address and sarcastic writing style never
         | changes, I do love the shock of some co-workers when they find
         | I have no accounts for linkedin, twitter, facebook, github etc
         | and generally create new throwaway accounts every time I get a
         | new laptop.
         | 
         | It comes as quite a shock when I find an old comment or post
         | that I recognise and now don't agree with and because of this
         | rarely judge others history, lets face it we have all posted
         | comments we wish we could take back in hindsight.
        
       | lkrubner wrote:
       | About this:
       | 
       | "If you had asked me right after I got laid off how long it would
       | take me to get back to work, I would have said three months -
       | including two months of vacation. It took me a year."
       | 
       | That is fascinating. I'm glad they shared this experience. It is
       | very different than my own experience. I'm trying to imagine what
       | that would be like, to go a year looking for a job.
       | 
       | Here in New York City, at the end of 2022, I am still seeing very
       | strong hiring of software developers. I was recently hiring at
       | FutureStay.com. And I recently had a friend lose their job and
       | they found another job after 6 weeks, of which 3 weeks was pure
       | vacation.
       | 
       | The one group that I see struggle is new developers who have just
       | graduated from dev bootcamps. Some of these developers struggle 6
       | to 12 months to find a software development jobs.
       | 
       | But of experienced software developers? Going a year without
       | finding employment? I heard of such stories during the recession
       | of 2001, though I never saw it among my personal circle. And this
       | was very much true in the aftermath of the crisis of 2008 -- it
       | wasn't till about 2011 or 2012 that things got back to normal.
       | But even then, when I went looking for a job in 2010, it only
       | took me 4 weeks to find a job.
       | 
       | A year without a job?
       | 
       | I will say the industry has gotten slower about hiring, with more
       | and more rounds of interviews. In the extreme case, some
       | companies now have 9 or 10 rounds of interviews, which is far
       | past the point where the Law Of Diminish Returns sets in. By
       | contrast, when I was hired at WineSpectator.com in 2010 the CTO
       | interviewed me for 2 hours and then hired me on the spot, I
       | didn't have to talk to anyone else. Likewise when Mark
       | Herschberg, the CTO of ShermansTravel.com, hired me in 2011.
       | 
       | I feel like the industry is driving away possible talent by
       | adding in so many layers of testing and recruitment.
       | 
       | There is absolutely no good reason why an experienced software
       | developer should go a year without a job. That such a thing can
       | happen suggests something is broken with our current hiring
       | processes.
        
         | pm90 wrote:
         | I found this a bit strange as well. A year seems a bit
         | excessive. The most I've seen is 4 months, with an average of
         | much less than that.
        
       | georgeburdell wrote:
       | I can relate to #2 the most. My job search was 11 months, and
       | this was in 2021 during the supposedly ridiculously good market.
       | I think I had 50 applications and 7 on-sites before getting an
       | offer
        
       | blagie wrote:
       | My advice:
       | 
       | Have one or more side projects going all the time. If you get
       | laid off, immediately start doing a startup, open-source project,
       | or volunteering full time. A year of unemployment? Lonely,
       | depressing, and not good on a resume.
       | 
       | A year of launching an unsuccessful venture? Running coding
       | classes for the underserved? Focusing full-time on contributing
       | to pytorch? That's a lot better, both at the time and in
       | retrospect.
       | 
       | Side projects are also a good way to get hired. You meet people.
       | 
       | You also learn stuff, and stuff of the type you can't learn in a
       | job.
       | 
       | You can also do the equivalent of an acquihire. If you want to
       | work for the world's #1 drubble maker, and you spend 6 months
       | developing a drubble startup, guess who'll come out the most
       | knowledgeable and passionate about drubbles at the interview? And
       | perhaps even bring in some helpful IP?
       | 
       | Your back story is "I tried to go it alone; I think I can do a
       | lot more good with the backing of a company."
        
         | awillen wrote:
         | I've taken time off between jobs without taking on any
         | meaningful projects, and I generally haven't found it to be an
         | issue. When I tell recruiters I just wanted time off to relax,
         | they're sometimes skeptical, but hiring managers more often
         | than not either respond with some variety of "Oh yeah, I did
         | that too and it was amazing" or "Oh man that sounds so great,
         | I'm jealous."
         | 
         | I do apply almost entirely to smaller startups, so that may
         | skew the response vs. what you'd get in the more process-
         | oriented recruiting flows of a larger company. Also it probably
         | helps that my resume has a couple of jobs where I was a very
         | early employee at startups that went on to be extremely
         | successful.
         | 
         | I also really like to just be left alone and read books, so
         | it's something I enjoy - I recognize that many folks need the
         | structure of work, and that's fair.
        
           | anon50118810 wrote:
           | It's important to quantify how long your time off was for
           | this anecdote to be meaningful. No good employer will bat an
           | eye if you worked at a place for five years then spent three
           | months on a tropical beach. A year spent job searching with
           | no luck like the OP is a different situation altogether.
        
             | awillen wrote:
             | I actually don't think that's as much of a problem as you'd
             | think - I did nine months off after 2.5 years. I just
             | wouldn't say you've been searching and not getting jobs -
             | much better to say that you've interviewed at a few places,
             | but you're very focused on finding a company whose mission
             | and team you're excited about (particularly if that's
             | true). If they accept that as true, then you're creating a
             | positive sort of scarcity of yourself, as opposed to
             | framing it as jobs being scarce and you being desperate for
             | one.
        
           | reaperducer wrote:
           | _hiring managers more often than not either respond with some
           | variety of "Oh yeah, I did that too and it was amazing" or
           | "Oh man that sounds so great, I'm jealous."_
           | 
           | This only works if you get to even talk to a hiring manager.
           | 
           | Most applications are filtered by automatic systems. Many of
           | those will penalize or discard your application for gaps.
           | 
           | The same AI bots we built when we were employed are now being
           | used against us.
        
             | awillen wrote:
             | True, though I don't think it has anything to do with AI -
             | the filtering mechanisms are much simpler than that.
             | 
             | That said, I like early-stage startups, so less of a
             | problem with that kind of thing.
        
         | tayo42 wrote:
         | > A year of unemployment? Lonely, depressing, and not good on a
         | resume.
         | 
         | I'm 4 months into a break from work and the only thing that is
         | depressing is the idea of going back to work.
         | 
         | I think if this quote resonates with you, you probably need a
         | break from work and analyze your life.
        
         | rychco wrote:
         | I see other comments aggressively criticizing this suggestion
         | (& I'm happy to see it) but I think staying busy with
         | _something_ fulfilling outside of your job is generally good
         | advice. It doesn 't need to be resume filler. The constant
         | grindset-mindset is toxic, but staying engaged/fulfilled with
         | _something_ can be tremendously beneficial for your mental
         | health  & happiness during a period of setbacks & struggle.
        
         | jimmaswell wrote:
         | This is a live-to-work attitude. Have some other hobbies and
         | goals, and a year of unemployment will be neither lonely nor
         | depressing. Personally I've gone farther in the work-to-live
         | direction, with an easygoing, "boring" (still fulfilling enough
         | to see some javascript doodad come to life, but not world
         | changing) WFH job I perform well in that supports my
         | homesteading and other hobbies.
        
           | fullstackchris wrote:
           | The author anyway had this mentality:
           | 
           | > If you're like me, work is the primary shaper of your life.
           | Work gives your life rhythm. It is the gravitational center
           | around which the other activities in your life revolve.
        
             | rootusrootus wrote:
             | I think this happens to a lot of people. Especially for
             | people who really enjoy the work they do, rather than see
             | it as a necessary evil to put a roof over their head.
        
           | fxtentacle wrote:
           | I guess that depends on how much you enjoy your side
           | projects.
           | 
           | Over the Christmas holidays, I rooted the vacuum robot, built
           | a workstation from parts, worked on a new compression
           | algorithm, and enhanced my papwrcraft design software...
           | Because that's what I enjoy doing in my free time.
        
             | jimmaswell wrote:
             | I've gotten back into enjoying tech projects again too. I
             | just try to make sure my life isn't revolving around
             | employment.
        
             | Aloha wrote:
             | I work a job to pay for my side projects. If I could just
             | work on those, taking care of the house, etc, and still
             | make a living, I'd be very happy.
        
           | Damogran6 wrote:
           | This late in my career, I've found 5 of my 7 SIEMs are gone,
           | and the last one is on life support. The one I'm managing now
           | will not be around by the time I retire.
           | 
           | You start to see the patterns and futility and cycles and
           | think 'maybe my career is not making things better, it's
           | keeping the mortgage paid?'
           | 
           | That and while I'm I can get rehired past 50...do I really
           | want to do that dance again?
        
             | rwmj wrote:
             | SIEM?
        
               | sciurus wrote:
               | https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Security_information_and_
               | eve...
        
             | miramba wrote:
             | Same here, past 50 and while my job doesn't fulfill me, I
             | can do it with little effort and it pays the bills. I'm too
             | tired and lazy to try something new, rather look for
             | fulfillment in my spare time. Actually, all my previous
             | experiences say that every job sucks, no matter how
             | promising it looked like at the start.
        
           | phpisthebest wrote:
           | Or its "if you enjoy what you do you will never work"
           | attidude
           | 
           | I have met soo many sysadmins and devs that absolutely hate
           | computers, hate programming, hate everything about IT. They
           | were in some career fair at some point in high school and
           | simply picked that because it had high pay with out the 6 or
           | 8 years being a Doctor or lawyer took, and it seemed easier
           | than Electrical Engineering or something.
           | 
           | Me, I have always loved programming and computers. They are
           | both my work and my hobby
        
             | Siddarth1977 wrote:
             | Two other factors to consider: 1) people grow and change
             | and 2) working a job is very different than doing "the
             | same" activity as a hobby.
             | 
             | I enjoy gardening and cooking as hobbies, but I don't want
             | to work a job as a landscaper or line chef. After 20+ years
             | of coding, I absolutely hate it despite having started out
             | loving it, but I recognize that my cushy job is less hours
             | for more pay than I could get doing anything else.
        
             | sangnoir wrote:
             | > I have met soo many sysadmins and devs that absolutely
             | hate computers, hate programming, hate everything about IT
             | 
             | > Me, I have always loved programming and computers. They
             | are both my work and my hobby
             | 
             | I think you're being too harsh, and clearly, you've never
             | experienced burnout, which will make you loathe programming
             | as work _and_ as a hobby. Unless you are self employed, it
             | is possible to hate your programming job while enjoying
             | coding at home, without being in it for the money.
             | 
             | "If you enjoy what you do you will never work" is such bs,
             | and leads to exploitation (see AAA games' low pay and
             | crunching, or underpaid airline pilots)
        
               | doubled112 wrote:
               | This is incredibly true for me.
               | 
               | I like problems, but mostly the technical ones. Starting
               | programming young, loved computers and networking. Became
               | a sysadmin.
               | 
               | Turns out that at work, the problems are often different
               | to what I want to be solving. Approvals and process can
               | be a real downer. Some problems are people problems and
               | not technical problems at all. Waiting on somebody else
               | to complete their part while you wait sucks. These are
               | the things that burn me out.
               | 
               | At home, I am the approval process. Maintenance is
               | whenever I think is reasonable. Don't like a service/app,
               | throw it away. Found a new project, tinker away.
               | Something is down, I'll get around to it.
               | 
               | Completely different.
        
         | harshalizee wrote:
         | This is terrible, possibly toxic advice. Software devs are
         | people too. They burn out, take time off to travel, reflect,
         | take care of family, or just down on their luck being
         | unemployed.
         | 
         | The only advice I'd consider paramount is to take stock of
         | themselves financially and mentally, to assure themselves that
         | they can take on the chaos and uncertainty that follows.
         | 
         | Honestly, if someone showed up with a gap in their resume and
         | claimed that they were doing start-up, open source, etc. for an
         | interview, I'd dig deep into that hard. The open source
         | contribution/project would have to have a sufficiently high bar
         | for it to be even considered. Else, I'd just assume they were
         | being less than honest. I'd rather someone tell me they spent a
         | year working on themselves, playing video games, hiking, etc.
        
           | Ialdaboth wrote:
           | Terrible advice. One year of lazing around and playing
           | videogames is a good way to lose any self-discipline you
           | would been building up to this point. There is nothing toxic
           | in working to improve yourself and/or building projects you
           | are passionate about - quite the contrary. The feeling of
           | accomplishment can do wonders to one's mental health.
        
             | kelnos wrote:
             | Speaking of toxicity, this idea that the primary means of
             | valuing ourselves and being "healthy" should be through our
             | job or independent job-related work... ugh, super toxic.
             | 
             | I don't think the grandparent was suggesting they literally
             | sit around for a year and do nothing buy play video games.
             | But, hell, taking time off between jobs is a _great_ idea,
             | and if video games are your thing, spending a chunk of that
             | time off playing sounds like it could be great for your
             | mental health. But, just like anything else, moderation!
        
             | thunky wrote:
             | > One year of lazing around and playing videogames is a
             | good way to lose any self-discipline you would been
             | building up to this point
             | 
             | Do you really want people to devote their life to their
             | jobs, even while unemployed?
             | 
             | I don't see a thing wrong with spending your down time
             | doing whatever makes you happy.
        
           | LawTalkingGuy wrote:
           | > This is terrible, possibly toxic advice.
           | 
           | [Continuing working] is the single biggest thing someone can
           | do to avoid depression after a layoff. The best idea is a
           | paying job because it fills both requirements.
           | 
           | It also keeps you ready to interview and ready to start
           | immediately. When you're on the couch it's always easy to
           | wait till tomorrow.
           | 
           | > I'd rather someone tell me they spent a year working on
           | themselves, playing video games, hiking, etc.
           | 
           | If they were independently wealthy that might be okay but for
           | most people this is self-destructive behavior.
        
           | sangnoir wrote:
           | > Honestly, if someone showed up with a gap in their resume
           | and claimed that they were doing start-up, open source, etc.
           | for an interview, I'd dig deep into that hard
           | 
           | Hah, and you called gp's advice toxic! Taking stock if your
           | financial well-being _after_ being laid off is too late. I
           | fear your advice (take time off) may be toxic - depending on
           | circumstances. My advice is this: as a general rule, avoid
           | interviewing while desperate. Getting an offer generally
           | takes longer than one might think, so interview early and
           | often, before you get near the end of your mental /financial
           | runway.
        
             | kelnos wrote:
             | I think we're abusing the word "toxic" here. Sure, for
             | someone who hasn't planned out their finances and built a
             | cushion, advising them to take some time off would be...
             | well, bad advice. But "toxic"? That's a bit hyperbolic.
        
           | yoyonamite wrote:
           | > Honestly, if someone showed up with a gap in their resume
           | and claimed that they were doing start-up, open source, etc.
           | for an interview, I'd dig deep into that hard.
           | 
           | This is just as, if not more toxic than the advice that
           | you're opposed to. I've had similar experiences with
           | interviewers for non-technical questions, and it comes off as
           | aggressive, antagonistic and traumatizing; especially in your
           | example where they left it off their resume as a gap. The
           | interviewee's perspective might have been to say that they've
           | been spending some of their spare time keeping their skills
           | sharp and now you're hammering them to see if a project left
           | off their resume qualifies for some "high bar," while all
           | they see is a negative and dismissive attitude.
           | 
           | Personally, I would much rather be programming my own
           | projects or doing leetcode than play video games, but I
           | wouldn't judge someone negatively if they told me they played
           | games on their own time.
        
           | ignoramous wrote:
           | > _This is terrible, possibly toxic advice._
           | 
           | There are two sides to every coin. Possibly toxic advice for
           | some, but why should anyone give up platforms or avenues that
           | make them standout from the crowd? OP's suggestion is a
           | perfectly valid piece of advice for anyone who has the
           | energy, time, resources, ability, will, and integrity to keep
           | chopping at a meaningful side project. It is not easy, sure.
           | But I don't think we can say it is toxic, either.
           | 
           | > _The open source contribution /project would have to have a
           | sufficiently high bar for it to be even considered._
           | 
           | We'd do well to not write this advice off by subjecting it to
           | the most extreme possible treatment?
        
             | drewcoo wrote:
             | > There are two sides to every coin
             | 
             | And there are six sides to every cube. In a world of
             | tortured dichotomies, nobody ever mentions those.
        
               | undreren wrote:
               | I couldn't have said it better myself.
               | 
               | With three kids, my current side project is my _day job_
               | , at least if measuring by workload. Taking on more work,
               | voluntarily or not, will be at a significant personal
               | cost for me.
               | 
               | I don't get the constant peddling of hussle porn in SWE
               | circles.
        
           | harshalizee wrote:
           | Edit/Addendum : Uff this blew up. If I came on too strong,
           | that wasn't my intention and I'm sorry.
           | 
           | I was primarily replying to this particular line from OP : >
           | If you get laid off, immediately start doing a startup, open-
           | source project, or volunteering full time.
           | 
           | The 'immediately' didn't really jive with me. A job loss can
           | be very traumatic to an individual, and I still believe in
           | taking time to recuperate from it rather than diving head
           | long into yet another thing.
           | 
           | I've interviewed quite a lot for my employers, big and small,
           | including two of FAANMG companies for about 7 years now. From
           | my perspective, I'm interviewing a candidate to see if
           | they're a competent engineer and a pleasant team member. I
           | have absolutely no issues with passion projects / open-source
           | and startups, just not if it's aim is to be a resume filler.
           | 
           | >Focusing full-time on contributing to pytorch?
           | 
           | Yes! That is amazing and I already know that they're a far
           | more adept engineer than I am. But, if we were to dive in and
           | I find out it was mostly fixing typos and nits in the
           | codebase to show GitHub greens, then someone else who did
           | something else entirely during their time off would come off
           | better.
        
           | brailsafe wrote:
           | As someone who's been in that position at least twice (been
           | fired or laid off and haven't been able to find _anything_
           | for over a year), I wouldn't go so far as to say it's wholly
           | terrible or toxic, but at least partially so, or a little
           | naive in some way. I'd say you should take at least a few
           | months of personal time if you can afford it, and it's worth
           | having _something_ to chip away on eventually, but not
           | necessarily to have something on your resume. Doing this
           | full-time is borderline stupid advice, it will very likely
           | not be worth trading your otherwise personal time for, unless
           | you 're literally charging for consulting services or
           | something. Even still, if you're aiming for employment, just
           | take your time.
           | 
           | Looking back on the times I've had to deal with this, and
           | looking forward to the times I almost certainly will again,
           | I'd do nothing different than what you've recommended or that
           | I've done, with the exception of haplessly paying rent hoping
           | for that next absurdly long and thoughtlessly designed
           | interview process to work out.
        
           | atomicnumber3 wrote:
           | What if they showed up with a gap and simply said "I have
           | plenty of money and took the time to myself, my family and my
           | interests"?
           | 
           | (I've never had a resume gap but that's going to be my
           | explanation if/when I do.)
        
             | Beaver117 wrote:
             | It's bad to say that. Companies don't want their employees
             | to be financially secure and have the leverage to quit at
             | any time.
        
           | chadash wrote:
           | > Honestly, if someone showed up with a gap in their resume
           | and claimed that they were doing start-up, open source, etc.
           | for an interview, I'd dig deep into that hard.
           | 
           | As a counterpoint, I probably _wouldn 't_ dig into this too
           | much. But even if I did, would I find it strange that someone
           | got laid off and then used their time to build up a company
           | that didn't work out? Probably not. And if I realized that it
           | was a half-assed effort... so what? Why is that worse than
           | time spent playing video games? Sure, if you told me you were
           | working on building a company and you didn't have _any_
           | progress, I might feel that you were dishonest. But if you
           | 've got at least something to show for it (a basic product,
           | even with zero sales), I think it's fair game.
        
           | optymizer wrote:
           | If you're not passionate about coding, that advice isn't for
           | you. There is a class of people for whom coding is 'work', as
           | in the actual act of coding is work and they would prefer to
           | be doing anything else, but they have bills to pay.
           | 
           | There is another class of developers who like to code so
           | much, that 'work' is merely a project that they don't have
           | directional control over, but the act of coding is a relaxing
           | activity. I know because I'm one of them. I am pretty relaxed
           | at work when I can just sit down and code, then I go home and
           | if I get some free time to work on my own code, I find it
           | relaxing too. It's not that I don't enjoy work and have to
           | supplement with a personal project, I just like the feeling
           | of having absolute control over the project and trying to
           | write the best code possible, because making money or
           | providing some shareholder value is not the goal.
           | 
           | For people like me, I think this is a great advice. I am
           | always thinking of side-projects that can become startups
           | anyway, and I'm tinkering every day to the extent that time
           | allows. I've been doing that for 20+ years. If I ever got
           | laid off, my only hope is that at that point I will have a
           | side-project that can magically be launched to make enough
           | money to keep paying the bills.
        
             | shrimp_emoji wrote:
             | > _There is another class of developers who like to code so
             | much, that 'work' is merely a project that they don't have
             | directional control over, but the act of coding is a
             | relaxing activity._
             | 
             | I'm in the middle. Imagine you like playing football. You
             | do it for fun. But, if you do it too much, you'll be
             | exhausted and maybe strain a muscle or something. I code
             | for fun, but it still wears me out; it's still a kind of
             | "work" psychologically distinct from, and more taxing than,
             | watching a show.
             | 
             | The only way I would describe it as "relaxing" is if I put
             | little-to-no thought into it, but that's how you end up
             | with very buggy code.
        
           | throwuwu wrote:
           | > The open source contribution/project would have to have a
           | sufficiently high bar for it to be even considered. Else, I'd
           | just assume they were being less than honest. I'd rather
           | someone tell me they spent a year working on themselves,
           | playing video games, hiking, etc.
           | 
           | You think working on a passion project and trying out a
           | startup is toxic and then you come out with this pessimistic
           | bucket crab viewpoint? You'd be doing people a favour not
           | hiring them, I'd feel bad for anyone working for you.
        
             | the_af wrote:
             | The comment you're replying to said the _advice_ was toxic,
             | not the activity itself. That is, making people feel guilty
             | for not doing  "enough" (contributing to side projects,
             | open source, etc) is the arguably toxic thing.
             | 
             | I don't know if I agree, but let's not twist the words of
             | the comment.
        
         | SamoyedFurFluff wrote:
         | Did you get a job this way? Do you know anyone who got a job
         | this way?
        
           | justinlloyd wrote:
           | Almost every single job I've ever gotten is because of a side
           | project or because I incorporated a small company to
           | legitamise a side-project I was hacking on.
           | 
           | Over the years:
           | 
           | I built a video capture system for the Commodore Amiga as a
           | neat side project for that lead to me working on Transputers
           | that formed the heart of a non-linear editing system (no
           | interview)
           | 
           | The Transputers were really fast, so I wrote some neat 3D
           | demos that ran on the Transputer boards in the Amiga & PC =>
           | contract work with SGI (no interview)
           | 
           | Wrote a demo for the SGI video capture system to scan a
           | magazine at high resolution => machine vision & robotics that
           | was changing the printing industry (no interview)
           | 
           | Wrote a C compiler for an 8-bit micro so I could learn C =>
           | leads to writing a C compiler for a 16-bit micro at a company
           | (no interview)
           | 
           | Created a "smart home dashboard" for a side-project => leads
           | to writing a mobile app to manage a WiFi router => leads to
           | becoming Lead Firmware Engineer on the project (no interview)
           | 
           | I wrote some stuff on the Unity3D forums => game development
           | job offer (no interview)
           | 
           | Ran a number of in-person developer meet-ups over the years
           | => various jobs & offers & contract gigs (no interview)
           | 
           | Got asked by a friend to teach a class on device driver
           | development at USC, video recorded it, he sent it to his
           | friend at Intel => wind up teaching many, many week long,
           | rocket-science level classes on Linux & Android & device
           | driver development & board bring-up at Intel (no interview)
           | 
           | Recorded all of my lectures at Intel, shared them with a
           | friend at Facebook who was trying to get in to device driver
           | development => Which lead to me teaching a couple of classes
           | at Facebook (no interview)
           | 
           | Asked to critique a ReactNative class at Facebook due to my
           | other teaching there => Which lead to me
           | consulting/contracting for Facebook for a few years (no
           | interview)
           | 
           | Video tape my classes at Facebook, which get shared with
           | people at Microsoft & Apple without my knowledge => end up
           | consulting and teaching at both Microsoft & Apple (no
           | interview)
           | 
           | Created a bot for a popular MMORPG coupled with machine
           | vision and some AI techniques => contract job to detect bots
           | in the self-same popular MMORPG (no interview)
           | 
           | I created a C# package and published it that done some fancy
           | stuff with random numbers => company hired me to work on
           | their project that used the library (that was an
           | "interesting" interview)
           | 
           | I wrote some SONY PlayStation developer tools => leads to
           | getting a job at a game development company creating a PSX
           | game (no interview)
           | 
           | Create some tools to theme websites and pull data from a
           | database => accidentally create an adult entertainment empire
           | (no interview)
           | 
           | Document how the Gameboy works, write some developer tools,
           | maintain some developer tools => multiple jobs developing
           | Gameboy games (no interview)
           | 
           | Port MAME to a bunch of consoles, write emulators as side-
           | projects for other consoles => hired to write emulator of
           | their classic consoles for "big console development company"
           | (no interview)
           | 
           | Hacked on some gstreamer code => connection with a guy at a
           | Canadian who says "if you're ever looking to move to
           | Canada..."
           | 
           | There's lot of other examples in my career where building a
           | side-project leads to an interview or a straight-up offer.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | scarface74 wrote:
         | This is a statistically horrible idea. The chance that your
         | startup is going to replace even the compensation of entry
         | level grad in any large city in the US doing enterprise
         | development is almost 0.
         | 
         | The "story" that has worked for me is that "no I'm not going to
         | reverse a binary tree on the whiteboard while juggling bowling
         | balls riding a unicycle on a tightrope. What we can do is talk
         | like adults and we can discuss your real world business
         | problems and see if I can bring my skills and experience to the
         | table to help you solve those problems in exchange for money"
         | 
         | I'm not going to spend 40 hours a week working and more time on
         | the side working on a side project.
        
           | itake wrote:
           | Just wondering, what is your TC? My understanding is that
           | story works at Tier 3 companies that lack a structured
           | interview process and are desperate for candidates (e.g.
           | startups).
        
             | scarface74 wrote:
             | Seeing that I work at the alphabetically sorted first "A"
             | in FAANG, I don't think it could be considered a "tier 3"
             | company.
             | 
             | When a recruiter from Amazon Retail reached out to me about
             | an SDE position, I wasn't interested in either relocating,
             | working as a _software developer_ at any large company or
             | doing the prerequisite DS &A monkey dance.
             | 
             | We kept talking and she suggested that I apply for a fully
             | remote role consulting (yes it's a full time position) in
             | AWS Professional Services.
             | 
             | I specialize in "application modernization" which is a
             | fancy term for cloud enterprise application development +
             | "Devops" + the standard type of work architects do at other
             | companies.
             | 
             | But as far as the startup I worked for being "desperate". I
             | got hired at my previous company because of an informal
             | lunch with the then new CTO who needed someone to lead the
             | effort to make the company more "cloud native" and help
             | them pivot toward a micro service architecture because they
             | wanted to sell the services as backend to large health care
             | companies.
             | 
             | Hint: I did that well enough to go from never opening the
             | AWS console in mid 2018 to working at AWS two years later.
             | 
             | My interview was all behavioral where I talked through some
             | of my previous company changing successes at a startup and
             | a company where I led the integration effort when they were
             | on an acquisition spree.
             | 
             | My "TC" is fine. It would be better if my unvested AMZN
             | RSUs didn't drop by half since I got hired.
             | 
             | (Yes I knew the gatekeeping was going to start when i wrote
             | the first post above)
        
               | iLoveOncall wrote:
               | That's a long story to hide the fact that by refusing to
               | do LeetCode interviews you were not offered a software
               | engineering position.
               | 
               | You most likely are an SA, which is a position open even
               | to business degree holders and is barely technical, no
               | wonder you didn't have to LeetCode.
        
               | scarface74 wrote:
               | You mean not being "offered" a position I didn't want? I
               | have never had any desire to be a software developer at a
               | large company. I _like_ being able to:
               | 
               | - be on pre-sales calls with customers
               | 
               | - writing the proposals/statements of work
               | 
               | - deal with the decision makers from the customers side
               | 
               | - architect the entire solution from the development side
               | and the infrastructure/"dev ops side"
               | 
               | - do the actual work
               | 
               | - lead the user acceptance testing
               | 
               | - move on to another project
               | 
               | You seem to be under the mistaken impression that I care
               | about titles? I go to work to exchange labor for money to
               | support my addiction to food and shelter. My "TC" allows
               | me to do that very well.
               | 
               | I a not an "SA". I do hands on billable software
               | development that goes in production at the client site.
               | In the past two years I've done hands on keyboard coding
               | in Python, C#, JavaScript, and Go.
               | 
               | BTW, by the time I graduated from college in 1996, I had
               | been a hobbyist programmer in 4 different assembly
               | languages. I've maintained proprietary compiler tool
               | chains for Windows CE devices and spent half my career
               | bit twiddling in C and C++ with a little inline assembly.
               | 
               | I doubt that you're going to "out geek" me.
        
               | anon7725 wrote:
               | Just for context, people in scarface's type of role can
               | "out-TC" many platform/product engineers of the
               | equivalent level, depending on how rewards are
               | structured.
               | 
               | The downside that I've noticed is that field roles tend
               | to be cut first in response to market weather/customer
               | focus. But a skilled engineer doing field work is a
               | valued commodity in general.
        
               | scarface74 wrote:
               | Yes and No.
               | 
               | If I worked for an outside consulting company that would
               | be true - with the inherent risks you stated.
               | 
               | Working at AWS in ProServe, our compensation structure is
               | the same as SDEs - 4 year initial offer, large prorated
               | signing bonus, 5/15/40/40 RSU vesting schedule. It's
               | different for sales.
               | 
               | The bright side is that there is always work. Worse case,
               | I can be "hired" by another internal team that needs
               | someone to implement a solution to show off a new
               | service.
        
               | itake wrote:
               | I think you're misrepresenting your story in your
               | original comment. If you want to be an SDE at a Tier 1,
               | you have to leetcode. There is no persuading the
               | interviewer to pass you without testing your leetcode.
               | 
               | If you are comfortable taking a non-SDE role, then there
               | are opportunities at tech companies that don't require
               | programming skills or leetcode.
               | 
               | I'm happy you have found an alternative career path, but
               | you're comparing apples and oranges.
        
               | scarface74 wrote:
               | There are 2.7 million developers in the US. Most don't
               | work at a tier 1 tech company.
               | 
               | My original story said nothing about where I work. I was
               | originally referring to my process to get a software
               | development job from 1996-2018.
               | 
               | But it's not an accident I make "FAANG money" without
               | doing "leetCode". While I fell into a position at AWS,
               | high level consultants make more with the same skillset
               | than your typical BigTech SDE once they build a base.
               | It's higher risk and more hustle though.
               | 
               | I only brought up where I work now when someone brought
               | up the r/cscareerquestions type reply of "TC".
               | 
               | I am very sincere about my lack of desire to ever be a
               | software engineer for a large company. I would give up my
               | current compensation and jump back over to the enterprise
               | dev/architect side of compensation before I ever did
               | that.
               | 
               | Again, I already had the big house in the burbs,
               | retirement savings, etc before AWS ever reached out to
               | me.
               | 
               | If I leave my current job at the time of my choosing, it
               | will probably be a compensation cut and probably for some
               | unknown company.
               | 
               | I know for a fact that I could call up a few former
               | managers who now work at different companies and they
               | would give me a job faster than I could say "I am looking
               | for..."
        
               | iLoveOncall wrote:
               | I don't care that you have software engineering
               | experience, you are answering to a thread talking about
               | leetcode interviews by saying you didn't have to leetcode
               | because you took a non-software engineering job. Good for
               | you, but nobody cares.
        
               | scarface74 wrote:
               | I didn't do leetCode in:
               | 
               | 2008: when the director of software was looking for
               | someone with a weird combination of VB6, C#, and low
               | level C and C++
               | 
               | 2014: when the new director of software engineering was
               | looking for someone to be on a "tiger team" to go after a
               | new vertical
               | 
               | 2016: when the new director of IT was looking for someone
               | who could lead the effort to move from PowerBuilder to C#
               | and JS and to lead the integration efforts as they were
               | acquiring companies
               | 
               | 2018: when the new CTO was looking for a developer to
               | lead the effort to make their development and CI/CD
               | processes cloud native
               | 
               | 2020: current job.
               | 
               | From 2008-2020 it was mostly developing in C# and
               | JavaScript with a little C++ early on.
               | 
               | In 2018 I started getting into Python.
               | 
               | It's amazing what you kind of crap you can avoid when you
               | have 12 years of professional experience (in 2008) and a
               | good network.
               | 
               | Yes my career before 2008 was unremarkable and there is a
               | pattern that I gravitated toward positions where I was
               | one of the first technical hires by a new manager.
               | 
               | Each of the jobs I mentioned between 2008-2018 were a
               | recruiter reaching out to me that I knew from network
               | where the director/CxO was looking for someone to help
               | them with some type of strategic initiative. All of them
               | were more interested in my ability to technically lead
               | strategic initiatives than whether I could reverse a
               | binary tree on the whiteboard.
               | 
               | When you can talk to a technical director about how you
               | optimized 65C02 code as a hobby in the 80s and how you
               | wrote inline x86 assembly to speed up a batch processing
               | system, they don't wonder can you maintain a compiler for
               | Windows CE devices.
        
               | [deleted]
        
               | selimthegrim wrote:
               | If you read his past post history he has had what you
               | would call "technical" jobs before, even if you don't
               | count this one.
        
             | hinkley wrote:
             | Reversing a binary tree is a reference to a FAANG
             | interview.
             | 
             | Money makes life easier. It isn't the goal of your life. We
             | aren't playing a video game where the person who made the
             | most money "wins" at life.
        
               | itake wrote:
               | I've worked at small startups and dev shops with low
               | hiring hiring bars and I find way more "princesses" than
               | I have working at Tier 2 companies with leetcode
               | interviews.
               | 
               | "Princess" - people that don't take feedback, are
               | extremely opinionated about their work, and act
               | irrationally in regards to career or business decisions.
        
               | scarface74 wrote:
               | So do you consider a "low hiring bar" the director
               | talking about strategy and finding out from the
               | candidates past history that he can probably solve their
               | real world issues?
               | 
               | If he needs to be at two potential customers sites (large
               | health care companies) does he need someone who can
               | "grind leetcode" or does he need someone that can talk to
               | the CxO, the infrastructure team, the development team,
               | etc without embarrassing himself?
        
               | scarface74 wrote:
               | See my other reply for more context.
               | 
               | But given a choice in 2020 of working at any large
               | company _as a software developer_ where I would have had
               | to relocate and staying at smaller companies, I would
               | have definitely chosen smaller companies.
               | 
               | By 2020, I already had the big overvalued house in the
               | burbs, decent retirement savings, a good work life
               | balance, etc.
               | 
               | I fell into a role at BigTech almost by accident doing
               | the type of work I enjoy - seeing a company's problem,
               | solving the problem, training, and putting myself out of
               | job and moving on.
               | 
               | Heck, my expenses are lower now than they were in 2020.
               | Within the past year, I've sold my house, we sold our
               | cars, and now we have a cheaper investment
               | property/winter home where we stay half the year and we
               | fly across the US the other half of the year staying in
               | hotels. We own nothing physically can't fit in three
               | suitcases - two of which have to stay under 50 pounds.
        
               | anon7725 wrote:
               | Your situation seems unique - not many people are game
               | for 50% travel as they hit mid career.
               | 
               | Consulting does offer an alternative path to engineering
               | at big cos - usually the interview focus is on your
               | experience and ability to interface with a customer
               | rather than leetcode, etc.
        
               | scarface74 wrote:
               | That's true. But there was nothing stopping us from
               | staying at home and traveling like normal people.
        
           | tra3 wrote:
           | The intent is to learn and produce and be an able to talk
           | about rather than try to make money.
        
             | scarface74 wrote:
             | So if you aren't "learning and producing" at your day job,
             | what are you doing 40 hours a week?
        
               | enraged_camel wrote:
               | Speaking as someone who has juggled both a full-time job
               | and a part-time startup on the side before, I can answer
               | this: both of them contributed immensely to my
               | professional development, but in different ways, since
               | the business domains were very different (which also
               | meant developing proficiencies with different
               | technologies and tooling).
        
               | scarface74 wrote:
               | My perspective is different - not disagreeing with yours.
               | 
               | My goal is to constantly be "putting myself out of a
               | job". That means I need to be able to recognize a problem
               | or opportunity, understand the business context, do
               | enough of an MVP or POC that the rest of the organization
               | understands, train and move on.
               | 
               | Sometimes the internal organization doesn't have the
               | desire or capacity to maintain or evolve the solution. In
               | that case it's my job to find an outside consulting
               | company.
               | 
               | I don't do staff augmentation.
        
               | tra3 wrote:
               | I believe the gp was talking about the year of
               | unemployment referred to in the original post.
               | 
               | I was laid off for about a month earlier this year and it
               | was the most productive I've ever been, open source
               | contributions wise. Pragmatically, I should've grinded
               | leetcode but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I was
               | really enjoying the open source work though, a
               | combination of react and lisp. I did talk about it during
               | the interviews and maybe that came across.
        
         | greesil wrote:
         | Nope, I need that time to grind leetcode.
        
           | eulers_secret wrote:
           | This is exactly what happened to me when I quit.
           | 
           | "Now I'll have time for my projects!!"
           | 
           | Instead it's been "Grokking Algorithms", "The Competitive
           | Programmers Handbook", Alex Xu's "System Design", and enough
           | leetcode that I'm actually doing _more_ than I did at work.
           | 
           | What sucks is that there are still lots of medium problems I
           | cannot do. Hards are right out. Dunno what I'll do.
        
             | krumpet wrote:
             | I was in the exact same situation. What I did was take a
             | web manager job at a non-profit. I run their Wordpress
             | website. It isn't what I was hoping for when I left
             | marketing in the SAAS space, but it's a start and I finally
             | enjoy going to work.
             | 
             | I have complete autonomy in this role and am setting things
             | up so I'm not just managing a WP site, but actually working
             | on the code base and learning as I go.
             | 
             | My thinking is it's better to get paid to learn than grind
             | Leetcode at home (which I did for six long months).
        
             | martythemaniak wrote:
             | Not a widely shared opinion here, but this process will
             | make you a better engineer. Keep at it.
        
               | throwawaysleep wrote:
               | Memorizing decks of leetcode problems improved your
               | engineering skills?
        
               | the_doctah wrote:
               | Shockingly, sometimes Software Engineers are asked to
               | write algorithms for their job.
        
               | awa wrote:
               | Frankly, Leetcode seems like a more objective test to me
               | than a panel of interviewer grinding me on behavioral
               | questions checklist.
        
               | throwawaysleep wrote:
               | And you would never plunk down a memorized verbatim fix
               | in such a scenario.
        
               | the_doctah wrote:
               | No, but I'd be far more likely to choose the appropriate
               | data structure or canned algo since I know how they all
               | work
        
               | TedDoesntTalk wrote:
               | And you don't resort to memorized algorithms when that
               | happens. You research.
        
               | eulers_secret wrote:
               | You're definitely correct, I've learned a lot while
               | practicing leetcode. Especially about my chosen language
               | (Python). I do feel I'm a better engineer because of it.
               | 
               | I don't think much of what I've learned will be useful in
               | the day-to-day SWE grind. It's really quite interesting,
               | but I cannot recall ever having to remember the skeleton
               | of an iterative DFS before now.
               | 
               | I've taken away more useful lessons from system design
               | studying. If I had my way, I'd spend more timing
               | finishing "Designing Data Intensive Applications"
               | (AWESOME book), instead of figuring out why my oranges
               | aren't rotting correctly or trying to remember how to
               | solve the coin problem using dynamic programming instead
               | of a greedy algo.
               | 
               | On the plus side, once I've got a good memory base and
               | can solve random Mediums and some Hards, I should be OK
               | to pass basically any technical interview - barring
               | random chance. Right now I took a break for xmas and need
               | to go back to it, and _that_ is the hardest part :)
        
               | carlmr wrote:
               | I see this all the time, "coding interviews suck",
               | "leetcode doesn't test if you're a good coder", but in
               | the end it's better than nothing, and having worked at
               | places without coding interviews there's almost no bottom
               | to people's abilities. So a low, but existing, floor is a
               | good thing.
        
               | vsareto wrote:
               | The biggest issue IMO is lack of flexibility. Leetcode is
               | a specific format with specific questions, but is not
               | necessarily the work you'll do day-to-day.
               | 
               | What would be great is if companies offered multiple
               | formats including leetcode, take home, pair programming,
               | Github review, project review, just talking, etc.
        
               | shagie wrote:
               | There are several issues that leetcode solves that the
               | other ones don't work _as well with_ or have flaws that
               | prevent their use in some hiring processes.
               | 
               | Leetcode has a single rubric. The same questions and the
               | same answers. Conducting it has minimal additional effort
               | on the employer's side. It does have false negatives, but
               | it has fewer false positives.
               | 
               | Take homes are often similar to leetcode, but some less
               | scrupulous companies have used them for unpaid work (note
               | that this becomes more and more of an issue as the take
               | home becomes more and more relevant to hiring company)
               | the and unless the interviewer has done the take home
               | themselves to benchmark it (this should take between 1-2
               | hours), it is possible that the request be "do this thing
               | that will take 20 hours."
               | 
               | GitHub review requires that the person have a GitHub
               | project of sufficient size, that it isn't just copied
               | from someone else and that they have time to work on it.
               | There's a joke in /r/adventofcode that shows a GH repo
               | that only has activity in December.
               | 
               | With pair programming, project review, and just talking
               | the lack of a rubic becomes an issue and it becomes more
               | likely that biases get into the interviewing process and
               | leads to possible issues of discrimination.
               | 
               | When mixing any of these so that some people do leetcode,
               | others do pair programming then it becomes an issue that
               | not everyone is considered using the same scale and those
               | biases and discrimination issues become even more
               | something that legal starts wondering about if they'll
               | have to deal with a lawsuit.
               | 
               | If one person can do the interview with "just talking",
               | then that should be the same criteria that everyone uses
               | (no leetcode) and "just talking" has an _abysmal_ false
               | positive rate.
        
             | fein wrote:
             | What situation are people in that they have to result to
             | this? Is this an issue with getting laid off and trying to
             | find a FAANG job?
             | 
             | I was laid off from one consulting company back in 2018 or
             | so and had a new gig with more pay a week or so later. No
             | leetcode or dev tests, just talking with people in phone
             | interviews. It was a company I had previously done contract
             | work for, and they called me, but nothing at the FAANG
             | level.
             | 
             | Is it an experience issue (are the people getting laid off
             | junior devs?), because I had maybe 6 years of dev
             | experience across various stacks by that time. In my 10
             | years of being an employed dev, I have never had to do
             | leetcode interviews.
        
               | hello_moto wrote:
               | >I was laid off from one consulting company back in 2018
               | or so and had a new gig with more pay a week or so later.
               | No leetcode or dev tests, just talking with people in
               | phone interviews. It was a company I had previously done
               | contract work for, and they called me, but nothing at the
               | FAANG level.
               | 
               | There's your answer: consulting companies and contract
               | works.
               | 
               | You have a different bubble compare to the LeetCode
               | crowds. The Leetcode crowds tend to work for Product
               | companies as a Full-Time employee in major Hi-Tech
               | cities. Product, Full-Time, major Hi-tech cities, hit
               | those 3 characteristics => higher chance of getting the
               | Leetcode interview jackpot.
        
               | eulers_secret wrote:
               | For what it's worth in my 15+ year career I have also
               | never had to do leetcode interviews... until now.
               | 
               | Part of it is that I'm pivoting from systems software
               | (Linux kernel) to webstuff. I have zero network here, if
               | I wanted to do systems again I'd have an easier time of
               | it.
        
               | Swizec wrote:
               | Unpopular opinion: If you're competing for a cattle job,
               | you have to do leetcode. If you want to be a pet, you
               | have to stand out to people who are looking for _you_
               | (what you have to offer), not just any fungible developer
               | with a pulse.
               | 
               | The challenge is that cattle jobs in tech have
               | historically paid very well thanks to the free money
               | environment. It looks initially like the right strategy:
               | Cushy job, cushy work, much money. But the glass ceiling
               | is hard and you won't see it coming until suddenly you've
               | had the same day-to-day for 10 years and no amount of
               | grinding leetcode gets you to the next level.
               | 
               | Fortunately standing out is easy: My girlfriend got a
               | (not-coding) FAANG-level job out of 2000 applicants in
               | part by being one of the three people who actually read
               | the job description and could hold an insightful
               | conversation about what she can bring to the table.
        
               | rr808 wrote:
               | If you've been working 10 years you're in the peak
               | desirability age. A few more years you'll be nearly 40,
               | after that people are much less likely to hire you.
        
               | eclipxe wrote:
               | Unless you make the move to management...in which case
               | age can be an advantage.
        
               | anon50118810 wrote:
               | In very large part what your interviews look like depends
               | heavily on when and where you're searching, what type of
               | job you want and what your background is. It's hard to
               | overstate this. 2018 might as well be an entirely
               | different universe.
               | 
               | That said I would be a little suspicious as a mid/senior-
               | level developer if I got hired at a place that didn't ask
               | me to do any coding for them at all beforehand.
        
               | ipaddr wrote:
               | 20+ years in. Don't be afraid those positions can lead to
               | a greenfield development project or come from departments
               | that don't have someone to vet your coding preferences.
               | Usually these positions offer more technical freedom. A
               | company who spends more time vetting code will generally
               | be a place with less freedom and more micromanagement.
        
               | nicoburns wrote:
               | > That said I would be a little suspicious as a
               | mid/senior-level developer if I got hired at a place that
               | didn't ask me to do any coding for them at all
               | beforehand.
               | 
               | I'd be suspicious if they didn't ask me to do any coding,
               | but I'd be just as suspicious if the coding they asked me
               | to do was leetcode.
        
               | didibus wrote:
               | Why are you opposed to leetcode?
               | 
               | While it annoys me as well to have to brush up a little,
               | someone who has both the discipline to review their
               | fundamentals, and that can demonstrate they have the
               | smarts to be good at it, that's a great sign of being a
               | good candidate.
               | 
               | It serves as a great arbiter, if two people seem to have
               | the same experience, how do you pick between the two?
               | 
               | And when hiring a junior, out of school, there will be no
               | experience to go by, so what else would you assess on?
        
               | nicoburns wrote:
               | > Why are you opposed to leetcode? > It serves as a great
               | arbiter
               | 
               | I'm opposed because I don't think it serves as a great
               | arbiter. At best, it selects for logical/academic
               | ability, whereas IMO the most important skill as engineer
               | is pragmatic decision making and building an appropriate
               | solution. In practice it just selects for people who have
               | studied leetcode (and to a lesser extent, those who have
               | a CS degree)
               | 
               | > if two people seem to have the same experience, how do
               | you pick between the two? > And when hiring a junior, out
               | of school, there will be no experience to go by, so what
               | else would you assess on?
               | 
               | You use a technical challenge that resembles the work
               | that the person would need to fulfil in the job. Perhaps
               | creating a single view of a website/app for a frontend
               | role. Or creating a few API endpoints for a backend role.
               | Or whiteboarding through a technical architecture (with
               | plenty of opportunity to ask clarifying questions).
        
               | criddell wrote:
               | I'm sometimes involved in the interviewing process for my
               | employer and we don't do any kind of coding tests. We do
               | ask for them to submit a sample of their work and use it
               | in the interview. I ask questions about the problem and
               | about how they solved it. The code itself isn't usually
               | that interesting, but the tangents we wander down usually
               | are. If the person can't communicate well about a
               | technical topic that they essentially chose, then they
               | probably won't get an offer.
               | 
               | That said, I work for a small company and our turnover is
               | pretty low. I haven't been involved in all that many
               | hires.
        
               | scatters wrote:
               | Submit a sample of their work? What employer lets their
               | ex employees do that?
        
               | fein wrote:
               | This is pretty close to what my experience has been on
               | the interviewee side. The conversations have been
               | technical in regards to talking through problem solving,
               | and esoteric coding philosophy conversations over lunch.
               | 
               | The only coding exams I've ever had to submit were while
               | working at consulting agencies for clients that require
               | an interview process to pick what the client regards as
               | the best candidates for the contract.
               | 
               | I also worked at "very small" (15 dev consultants) to
               | "medium-small" (300 or so technical consultants)
               | companies, hence why I was curious if this was a
               | bigconsulting thing or not.
        
               | Yoric wrote:
               | Last time my job was threatened, I spent a few weeks
               | brushing up on my algorithms, going through coding
               | challenges, reimplementing the basics (in my case, a
               | concurrent consumer-producer queue, an IPC mechanism,
               | etc.)
               | 
               | I'm an experienced systems developer with a pretty good
               | resume, I didn't want to look stoopid if I was asked any
               | such question in an interview.
               | 
               | Worked pretty well. I wasn't laid off but I ended up
               | changing job for something more fun than my then
               | position.
        
               | [deleted]
        
               | noodle wrote:
               | > What situation are people in that they have to result
               | to this? Is this an issue with getting laid off and
               | trying to find a FAANG job?
               | 
               | It's reflective of the type of company you're
               | interviewing for.
               | 
               | I lived in Seattle for a while, and almost every startup
               | in the area did some form of algorithm lottery
               | interviewing, because the startups were created by ex
               | AMZN/MS/etc employees and they just took the process they
               | were comfortable with to the next company.
               | 
               | I lived in Atlanta and a few other smaller cities for a
               | while before and after that, and no company did anything
               | like this, because the successful tech companies were all
               | born of people with no FAANG experience, with different
               | backgrounds and with different experiences.
        
               | carabiner wrote:
               | FAANG uses them because they're effective and scalable: h
               | ttps://old.reddit.com/r/cscareerquestions/comments/zhgtmr
               | /o...
               | 
               | They're derived from cognitive sciences research and they
               | have a high false negative rate, but it's more valuable
               | to these companies to capture the true positives.
        
               | vsareto wrote:
               | >What situation are people in that they have to result to
               | this?
               | 
               | Widespread interview advice targets the "worst-case
               | technical interview scenario" which is doing leetcode and
               | running a gauntlet of interviews. This casts the widest
               | net possible in terms of how many interviews you'll pass.
               | There's also a little bit of reasoning like "if you can
               | handle this, you'll be able to ace the easier
               | interviews".
               | 
               | The other things for job hunting - like using your
               | network and being contacted first - are additional layers
               | that you go through.
               | 
               | >In my 10 years of being an employed dev, I have never
               | had to do leetcode interviews.
               | 
               | I think the reason you hear prep advice so often is that
               | no one has any real data on how many companies are doing
               | leetcode interviews vs. non-leetcode interviews. Because
               | of this ambiguity, that's why you hear so much advice
               | about preparing for the worst case.
        
               | geekbird wrote:
               | I get interviews with "coding challenges all. the. time.
               | IDK why, I'm a Linux systems engineer, not a programmer.
               | 
               | But I constantly keep getting jerks wanting btree sorts
               | that are like a college exam or take home challenges that
               | assume I have industry type applications on my home
               | network. No, folks, I don't run containers and terraform
               | infra in my personal network. When I have to spend three
               | hours to install a dodgy application just to start your
               | janky "8 hour project" I lose all the enthusiasm I had
               | for your job.
        
             | the_only_law wrote:
             | God I wish I could get to suffer leetcode interviews, but
             | right now I can't even get past automated ATS screens.
        
           | itake wrote:
           | leetcode IS the side project 8)
        
         | Jagerbizzle wrote:
         | "A year of unemployment? Lonely, depressing, and not good on a
         | resume."
         | 
         | A year of unemployment seems significantly less depressing than
         | this statement. What if you were to travel (or hike/explore
         | your local area), focus on quality time with your family,
         | friends, or dog? This to me seems way less depressing than
         | grinding on some meaningless side-project, and as a hiring
         | manager at a FAANG I would absolutely look at a year on
         | someone's CV spent on these activities as a positive rather
         | than a negative.
        
           | geekbird wrote:
           | I've had bouts of unemployment lasting a year and a half.
           | It's really hard to focus on side projects when you are
           | worried about being able to pay the rent and health insurance
           | and your pittance of unemployment insurance has run out.
           | 
           | My advice to anyone in the tech field is to try to have a lot
           | of reserves, because tech is cyclical, and layoffs are
           | inevitable, like every two to five years.
        
         | rjh29 wrote:
         | I have a decent amount of savings and a side project I want to
         | do which could potentially earn money. Are you saying if I quit
         | my job and do this for a year or so, it'll fill a hole in my
         | resume and not affect future interviews?
        
           | anon50118810 wrote:
           | I would only hope to use that as a substitute for paid
           | employment if you actually incorporate, give yourself a
           | title, put your company on LinkedIn and otherwise treat it
           | like a business. Noodling around on a side project that you
           | might monetize eventually is not a substitute.
        
             | enraged_camel wrote:
             | No need to incorporate or give yourself a fancy title IMO.
             | "Founder @ sideproject.io" works well enough.
        
             | icedchai wrote:
             | I disagree. Incorporating, giving yourself a title, and a
             | LinkedIn page are things anyone can do. People who "play
             | business" spend tons of time on this stuff, along with
             | designing company logos, hiring accountants (for their zero
             | revenue business), and lawyers (for NDAs to protect their
             | non-existent idea.) I've seen it first hand. They'll do
             | anything to avoid actual work: building and selling a
             | product.
        
               | michaelt wrote:
               | I suspect what Anon means is: if you plan to tell people
               | your side project was your job, you should start treating
               | it as your job.
               | 
               | I play around with some side projects where I don't give
               | a shit about user counts or GitHub stars or commercial
               | viability, doing perhaps 4 hours work per week. If I told
               | people this was me at the height of my powers, I'd expect
               | them to be unimpressed.
        
               | anon50118810 wrote:
               | Yes, exactly, I'm saying that what will matter to future
               | employers is how much you treat the project as a job, and
               | not the project itself, no matter how interesting or
               | challenging it is from the technical side.
        
               | icedchai wrote:
               | It won't matter as much as you think. They'll probably
               | spend 5 minutes discussing it, if that. If you have a
               | demo or something to show for your time, that will be a
               | plus.
        
           | ctvo wrote:
           | Everytime I read these comments I feel like I work in another
           | industry. Who cares about the gaps in your resume? Truly,
           | have recruiters commented in anything but passing? Your
           | interviewers?
           | 
           | I've hired candidates with large gaps in their resume and
           | their reasoning for the most part was I wanted time off or I
           | went traveling or N other things that have nothing to do with
           | work. We. Did. Not. Care.
           | 
           | Pass the interview. This is the only thing we cared about at
           | Big Tech Co.
        
             | okaram wrote:
             | It's not so much the (closed) gaps, but the time since last
             | job. The _first_ job after you take a year off will be
             | harder to get. After that, most people won 't care.
        
               | ctvo wrote:
               | I don't think it matters as much as people here seem to
               | think.
               | 
               | You're the current CTO of a unicorn looking for a more
               | technical role with stability so you apply to be a staff+
               | engineer at Google. Now the opposite: you've taken a year
               | off to take care of an elderly parent. In both cases,
               | your resume is one of the lowest signals we have. You're
               | going to need to pass that interview.
               | 
               | HR folks aren't even looking this closely as long as you
               | have a resume with the right _prior_ experiences. And
               | almost none of these resume concerns matter with a
               | referral.
        
               | anon50118810 wrote:
               | All else equal, people with resume gaps are going to get
               | sorted to the bottom of the pile. Maybe at the high end
               | of the market, the FAANG staff level, there aren't enough
               | applicants so it's not a big deal, and they'll get to
               | those applications eventually. At the lower end of the
               | market however, there's more competition and more
               | likelihood that someone else from the top of the pile
               | will get hired before they get down to the bottom.
        
             | rjh29 wrote:
             | Are you working for FAANG etc? I work a mid-level IT job,
             | there is competition. I have no evidence but it seems like
             | candidates who are currently unemployed (especially for a
             | long time) will end up at the bottom of the pile. That at
             | least would make finding a new job harder.
        
             | phpisthebest wrote:
             | I have the same feeling, unless your response to the
             | question about the gap is "yea I was on the run from the
             | law for a while because I killed some people while robbing
             | a bank, then I had to spend some time in prison but I had a
             | really good lawyer" I dont know how much impact it really
             | has
        
           | eddsh1994 wrote:
           | Probably! I've done this to good success (gotten _better_
           | jobs when I come back to industry after failing)
        
           | ushakov wrote:
           | me and my co-founder did the same this year
           | 
           | thanks to our project's success we now get more and higher
           | offers now that we ever did in our lives
           | 
           | however, there's no way back for us
           | 
           | we left for a reason, with a concrete goal in mind
           | 
           | not just because we could
        
           | nicoburns wrote:
           | I've taken most of a year out to travel the world while doing
           | nothing work-related whatsoever and nobody seems to care.
        
         | screye wrote:
         | The only value of having a knee-jerk 'startup' going is to not
         | appear unemployed.
         | 
         | If it's for the optics, then I'd just move the dates of my
         | previous side-projects around and call it a faux-startup. It's
         | not lying. It is work you have previously done as a side-
         | project/school-project at some point. But saying you did it in
         | the last few months helps give the appearance of being
         | continuously employed and not being rusty.
         | 
         | SWE interviewing IS a fulltime job. When unemployed, it is
         | especially important to use that time to: [1] Reflect on what
         | job you want for your future & [2] Work on achieving that job.
         | Together, they will take up ALL your time. Tech recruitment
         | wants to have their cake and eat it too. You are expected to
         | have an excellent primary project and have time for the months
         | it takes to Leetcode. It's unrealistic and leads to a period of
         | overwork for candidates.
         | 
         | Jugaad is never optimal. But sometimes, Jugaad is necessary.
        
       | anticristi wrote:
       | I would love to read a European, perhaps Swedish version of this
       | article. 12+ months of unemployment insurance is standard here. I
       | guess it doesn't take the loneliness away, but might make
       | unemployment less traumatic.
        
         | the_af wrote:
         | I really liked the article, one of the few on this subject that
         | doesn't feel like self-help or a humble brag. So kudos to the
         | author.
         | 
         | That said, like you, I wonder if this is an American thing. It
         | feels to me as if many Americans are one job away from total
         | collapse, like their country is only ok for people with a good
         | employment and an utter nightmare for everyone else, with no
         | safety net at all except your own savings. With that in mind, a
         | year without a job prospect would indeed seem like living in
         | hell.
        
           | gorbachev wrote:
           | https://www.cnbc.com/2022/01/19/56percent-of-americans-
           | cant-...
        
           | belfalas wrote:
           | _> It feels to me as if many Americans are one job away from
           | total collapse, like their country is only ok for people with
           | a good employment and an utter nightmare for everyone else,
           | with no safety net at all except your own savings._
           | 
           | Yes, that is pretty much correct. Many many Americans, even
           | ones considered well-off, live a threadbare existence. To
           | Europeans it's unfathomable what can happen in the United
           | States but it's just as bad as you think if not worse. There
           | is literally no bottom in this society, there's no limits to
           | the depths you can fall.
        
         | system2 wrote:
         | In some cases unemployment means hunger, homelessness, or even
         | death. Those Swedish people live on another planet.
        
         | fatnoah wrote:
         | Looking at the internet, it looks like Sweden supports 300 days
         | of unemployment benefits that max out at 1200 SEK/day (about
         | $115 US). In the US, one can receive up to 210 days of
         | unemployment with a max benefit of $145/week.
         | 
         | So yes, there is unemployment insurance in the US, and it pays
         | almost 30% more than in Sweden. There is a HUGE gotcha, though,
         | and that's the cost of health insurance. Unless the former
         | employer is subsidizing, that costs about $400-700/month. There
         | are, in general, far fewer social welfare services to rely on
         | as well.
        
           | subrat_rout wrote:
           | If Sweden pays $115/day then it comes about $575/week. And if
           | US pays $145/week how it is 30% more than Sweden?
        
           | inkcapmushroom wrote:
           | I think you just compared a daily rate to a weekly rate, if
           | I'm reading correctly? Which would make the US rates very
           | small in comparison, especially combined with health
           | insurance as you describe.
        
       | deepzn wrote:
       | I would just add one thing here, aside from echoing the comments
       | on the great writing. Everyone needs to focus on saving when they
       | have a job for uncertain times. I've found it incredibly helpful
       | in the last year with some savings in the bank, to ward off the
       | uncertainty and chaos around not having a job, and taking it a
       | bit easy so to say.
       | 
       | Saving at least 20% or so of every paycheck is good standard
       | advice for rainy days. But, also not to keep any debt.
       | 
       | Lastly, it's not that terrifying these days to not have
       | employment in the software industry. Things will turn around as
       | long as you work on developing your skills. Staying positive is
       | good advice for the short and long-term. Because everything will
       | work out, and we usually stress a lot more than we really should.
        
       | drpossum wrote:
       | Hard truth #9: Bad grammar will erode your credibility
        
       | xyzelement wrote:
       | This is good, and/but is one dimension. A few from me:
       | 
       | - Have perspective. Several years down the line when you're in a
       | new company/career/life, you will recognize this layoff was a
       | necessary thing to happen for you to "get there."
       | 
       | - It's going to take a while. Every job I ever got, took waaaay
       | longer than it should have. Things happen. Roles get filled
       | internally, headcount goes away, etc. Job finding is inherently
       | filled with friction, so if it takes 6 months or more, don't
       | interpret that as "I am bad/this will never work" - it's just the
       | nature of the beast.
       | 
       | - Be in sync with your family on what matters. My wife was very
       | clear that she was going to be fine if it took me longer to find
       | a role I was really excited about. We were lucky that we could
       | afford that, and it's good to be explicit.
       | 
       | - There's no stigma in layoffs but you can generate your own
       | stigma in how you talk about it. Don't be bitter and do provide
       | some color. My answer why I was looking was "the company took a
       | big revenue hit with COVID and had to reduce headcount. The
       | strategy was to cut from areas that were further along in
       | technological maturity, such as (my area.) We lost a lot of
       | senior tech talent, including myself. I am really grateful having
       | worked there, though!" This is 100% true to what happened and how
       | I feel, and it's a great answer because it makes is clear I
       | wasn't fired because I was bad, and shows some maturity and
       | perspective.
       | 
       | - Be aware that your next job may not be your perfect job. It
       | should be good enough that you MIGHT want to stay there, but at
       | the very least can be a launching pad for your real next role.
       | When you are laid off, the question isn't "do I see myself here
       | the next 10 years" but more like "am I pretty sure this will be
       | an interesting / worthwhile year and a half"
       | 
       | - Don't be negative. The author posted some spreadsheet about how
       | rough his job search was and then was surprised that a company
       | wasn't interested in him. I don't think this is the same as
       | "truth can hurt you" - more like "companies are on the lookout
       | for red flags, and if you are the kind of person who complains in
       | public, maybe you are going to be a negative culture fit." That's
       | doesn't mean they want yes-men, but there's a big difference
       | between people who feel an obligation to dissent (strong
       | positive) to perceived complainers. Complainers are poison.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | swang720 wrote:
         | Speaking from personal experience the "there's no stigma in
         | layoffs" bit is not always true. Many places have asked me why
         | I was laid off upfront with an assumption that it was due to
         | performance reasons unless I'm able to prove otherwise.
        
       | jayceedenton wrote:
       | > Hard Truth #6: Honesty can only hurt you
       | 
       | I think the author has come away with the wrong lesson here.
       | 
       | Many engineers, particularly those that don't pay too much heed
       | to social mores, think they have some God-given right to share
       | details of all their private interactions publicly. Every tech
       | test they do is pushed to GitHub with an accompanying blog post.
       | Every interview has a transcript (somewhat one-sided) published
       | and shared to Twitter. This is typical oafish behaviour displayed
       | by mamy engineers and frankly, it annoys people. It's often
       | considered a red flag when hiring. Understanding when to be
       | discreet is an important skill for any employee.
       | 
       | Lying about why you're looking for work is a bad idea. That small
       | lie will escalate, you'll have to start stringing together more
       | lies, and when you get found out it won't reflect well.
       | 
       | This has nothing to do with radical honesty. I'm not suggesting
       | you air all your dirty laundry during an interview. But don't
       | lie. And don't publish all private interactions because you're a
       | fan of free software. It's not the same thing.
        
         | psychphysic wrote:
         | Agreed.
         | 
         | I was mortified at the simple description of that twitter post.
         | 
         | To lump that with honesty is probably unhelpful long term for
         | OP, certainly unhelpful as advice.
         | 
         | Why scrub social media early only to taint it later!?
        
         | mattm wrote:
         | We've heard "transparency" so much lately that it now gets
         | confused with honesty. They're not the same.
         | 
         | If a company asks where else you are interviewing an honest but
         | not transparent answer would be something like "I'm exploring
         | other opportunities at various places but don't feel
         | comfortable providing more details." If you were to ask a
         | company who else they are interviewing for the same role, you
         | would expect the same answer. It would probably cause alarm if
         | they actually told you the names of other people they were
         | interviewing!
        
           | jareklupinski wrote:
           | during one of the first interviews I ever had, the
           | interviewer took me to a private room where I could do the
           | coding part on my own
           | 
           | on the desk was the laptop they wanted me to use, some pens
           | and paper, and a stack of resumes from other people
           | 
           | the interviewer made no mention of the stack as they were
           | leaving or when they came back, and when I asked about it at
           | the end of the interview, they chuckled and changed the
           | subject... to this day I'm wondering if it was some test to
           | see if I threw the other resumes out (didn't get an offer
           | btw)
        
             | oorza wrote:
             | Pretty sure the test here is to see what you do when you
             | discover them. I'd give them more benefit of doubt and
             | guess that they wanted you to report it immediately, and
             | letting any mention of it wait until the end of the
             | interview was the wrong answer. If you're the sort of
             | person that believes in these sort of tricks (I don't),
             | you'd probably jump to the conclusion that the person
             | ignoring the pile of resumes was okay watching the place
             | burn down around him as long as it wasn't his job to fix
             | it. That's a huge leap of logic to make, except in the
             | whacky world of job interview shenanigans, where it's
             | basically par for the course.
        
         | EamonnMR wrote:
         | I was shocked by that too. Maintaining such a sheet is a good
         | idea, but never _ever_ share it. It's bad operational security.
         | It's also revealing more about you (what other companies think
         | of you) than it is about the companies in question.
        
         | jacquesm wrote:
         | If a company asks you about stuff that isn't any of their
         | business you have my permission (not that you need it) to lie
         | your ass off if you think it will help you. The power asymmetry
         | is such that unless the counterparty is extremely careful about
         | abusing that power that you will end up being cornered and
         | taken advantage of. If you present yourself as more desirable
         | than you are based on your current situation and it lands you a
         | job at a higher salary than you otherwise would have: more
         | power to you. But don't overdo it and realize that there is
         | some risk involved.
        
           | anon50118810 wrote:
           | I think it's healthier to instead develop the social skills
           | and confidence needed to answer any questions confidently
           | while enforcing boundaries about what you will and won't
           | answer. Outright lying can come from a place of weakness and
           | fear which isn't good to encourage.
        
           | kelnos wrote:
           | Lying is always risky, though. If the truth comes to light,
           | you are screwed. Even if it doesn't, you have to remember and
           | internalize your lie, and make sure anything you say in the
           | future is consistent with it. That requires extra work and
           | can be stressful. (And if you mess it up: again, you are
           | screwed.)
           | 
           | I don't buy the "you don't want to work for a company that
           | would ask you XYZ anyway" line. Sure, in some cases that may
           | be true, but sometimes someone (that is, a random person on
           | the interview loop, not a "professional interviewer" like a
           | recruiter) will ask or say something they shouldn't, and that
           | doesn't need to reflect poorly on the company (or even on the
           | person; who hasn't said something dumb on occasion?).
           | 
           | If you think a question is inappropriate, politely decline to
           | answer, using whatever verbal finesse you have available to
           | yourself. It takes practice and confidence to do so, but it's
           | the right thing to do.
        
           | some_furry wrote:
           | I always lie (through omission) in job interviews, because
           | there's no federal protection against discrimination on basis
           | of sexual orientation.
        
             | vengefulduck wrote:
             | Even when applying to companies that are LGBTQ friendly? I
             | sometimes self identify on applications if the company has
             | a good reputation with that kind of thing because I'd
             | expect It would give me some diversity points. But maybe
             | that's not the best idea.
        
               | some_furry wrote:
               | I do not trust "LGBTQ friendly" companies, unless their
               | board of directors is predominantly LGBTQ.
               | 
               | Once bitten, twice shy.
        
               | [deleted]
        
               | sobkas wrote:
               | > Even when applying to companies that are LGBTQ
               | friendly? I sometimes self identify on applications if
               | the company has a good reputation with that kind of thing
               | because I'd expect It would give me some diversity
               | points. But maybe that's not the best idea.
               | 
               | Pretending to be LBGTQ friendly is a good PR while
               | changing actual company culture is hard, expensive and
               | takes time. So don't get fooled by PR stunts and changed
               | policies because they will always be eaten by real
               | company culture.
        
               | jacquesm wrote:
               | > Even when applying to companies that are LGBTQ
               | friendly?
               | 
               | Ah, so sorry, we found a candidate who had more relevant
               | experience than you, but please do keep applying.
        
             | hgsgm wrote:
             | Has Bostock been overturned?
             | 
             | https://www.eeoc.gov/laws/guidance/protections-against-
             | emplo...
        
               | some_furry wrote:
               | A ruling by a court isn't the same thing as federal law.
               | 
               | There is no federal law establishing my rights, so if a
               | company tries to ask about my personal life (wife, kids,
               | etc.) I politely decline to answer, or I answer vague
               | enough that doesn't give them any useful information.
        
               | chrisbaker98 wrote:
               | How often does that happen though? I'm straight and I
               | don't recall ever being asked about my family or love
               | life in a job interview. Not that I'd keep it secret if
               | asked, but why the hell would they be asking?
        
               | yongjik wrote:
               | Yeah I'm also curious. When I was at Google there were a
               | list of things you were never supposed to ask a candidate
               | because that's Super Illegal(TM) and could expose the
               | company to lawsuits. That included sexual orientation and
               | marriage status. That was more than ten years ago, I'd
               | expect most IT companies would do the same by now, at
               | least in the US.
        
               | jacquesm wrote:
               | There are ways to ask those without being illegal and
               | these are employed quite frequently. Essentially any kind
               | of probing into someone's private life should be off-
               | limits.
        
               | jacquesm wrote:
               | That's exactly the sort of exchange that I had in mind.
               | Likewise for work at a previous company, your current
               | salary, whether or not you plan to have kids and so on.
               | Depending on where you live some of those may be illegal
               | but still, you need that job...
        
           | jasmer wrote:
           | Gosh, no - strongly recommending not doing this. (The lying
           | part)
           | 
           | Lying is one of the worst things you can do, it usually
           | speaks to an issue with integrity, a concern that comes
           | before almost all of them even intelligence, education,
           | aptitude, skills.
           | 
           | Learn the skill of polite deferral, of saying things without
           | saying them, diverting or embellishing a bit - and then only
           | if it's an issue not relevant to the job.
           | 
           | If someone in an interview asks you your 'political
           | orientation' (which obviously they shouldn't do and it would
           | raise a big red flag anyhow - but just as an example) you do
           | not have to be candid, but don't lie. You can say "I have a
           | variety of opinions, I try to keep an open mind" - so long as
           | you are comfortable with it and it's true. You have not lied,
           | but not fully answered the question because it's none of
           | their business.
           | 
           | I also think the OP here has misinterpreted 'transparency and
           | candor'.
           | 
           | Engineers who 'over share' are a bit annoying but then again,
           | you don't have to read their posts - but this is not the
           | issue.
           | 
           | The 'issue' here is the absolutely truthful information that
           | is 'just too much' for an interview setting.
           | 
           | Everyone needs to be honest and candid but not transparent
           | like you're talking to the IRS or your accountant.
           | 
           | Suppose they ask you why you might want to work at the
           | company, and you don't really feel hugely inspired, well,
           | instead of saying literally that, you can find at least
           | something interesting about the situation and allude to it.
           | There's something interesting about every situation. And of
           | course, if it's truly a bad situation just say that politely
           | and assume you won't be working there.
           | 
           | It's ok to ask 'Elephant in the Room' questions especially if
           | they are asked politely, if they can't handle that you don't
           | want to work there.
           | 
           | It's ok to be turned away for something arbitrary or mundane
           | (or any other reason) there will be other opportunities.
           | 
           | Getting turned down can make you very cynical and brings out
           | our worst, even conspiratorial tendencies so try to stay
           | grounded and keep your head on straight, don't be sucked into
           | the vortex of weirdness and 'ultra competitive civility' of
           | getting job shenanigans, it's not real, it's a big of a game,
           | recognise it a such.
           | 
           | Kind of like telling people to 'don't be nervous' on a date,
           | what I'm about to write is super glib but I think it's true:
           | stay true to your basic values and identity and I think it
           | will be easier to be more relaxed and authentic in
           | interviews. The 'game' will pull you towards negative
           | behaviours I have found it's a lot easier not to do them if
           | you literally just decide that you are not going to do so for
           | reasons of morality or values or whatever.
        
             | jacquesm wrote:
             | Companies lie to their prospective employees all the time.
             | About how much runway they have, about the work that you'll
             | be doing, about what it is like to work there.
        
             | oorza wrote:
             | > And of course, if it's truly a bad situation just say
             | that politely and assume you won't be working there
             | 
             | Or "this situation sucks, that's why I'm excited. I want to
             | lead the charge out of the darkness and into the light" or
             | some such self-aggrandizing metaphor. Assuming, of course,
             | you are willing to take a job whose primary function is
             | fixing a broken team.
        
         | charles_f wrote:
         | I don't know about that. Something that makes me sick to my
         | stomach is the current only accepted behaviour to react to
         | being laid off by being grateful to such a wonderful company to
         | have given me opportunity to learn and blah, blah, blah. There
         | is so much dishonesty and fake gratefulness around that
         | anything departing from that, including just sharing that you
         | interviewed a lot and only found dead ends, is a black flag.
         | 
         | I get that this is marketing, and that's the game in an
         | employer market. But sh*t, no-one is calling out the fact that
         | maybe the responsibility is not only on the incoming recession,
         | but also how dumb a large portion of the industry has been in
         | trying to ignore as best as possible a freaking war, a
         | pandemic, and flying oil prices, and carried on over-hiring at
         | high wages. I'm grateful mine didn't go in that game and froze
         | hiring very early on.
         | 
         | Maybe it's an emphasis, the way I read it is that you should
         | keep your unpalatable opinions to yourself, because being
         | critical of the system is cause to be rejected by it.
        
       | JackFr wrote:
       | I was laid off in April 2020 as well, and while some of my
       | experience matches the author's some of it was very different.
       | 
       | Being laid off was not a relief -- it was terrifying. All
       | indications were that a severe recession was coming. Frankly, it
       | was quite surprising to me that companies were hiring at all
       | given the uncertainty. It was not obvious at the time that broad
       | sectors of the economy could seamlessly move to 100% WFH. It was
       | also my first experience in fully remote interviewing.
       | 
       | I am a software engineer over fifty. I also have three children
       | two of whom were in college, and my wife works in a travel
       | related industry which was very much affected by the pandemic.
       | 
       | Given those things I approached my job search aggressively and
       | with a sense of urgency, and I made it out OK. I was out of work
       | for about two months and accepted a role at flat comp.
       | 
       | Being laid off is profoundly lonely. I was part of a mass layoff
       | (approximately 2/3 of my company was laid off.) So while I was
       | not alone in that sense, we were all very much alone together.
       | Where you had been a team, you were now five people looking for
       | jobs, each with their own problems and constraints. My wife could
       | not have been more supportive, and yet the process of
       | interviewing and landing a job is one you have to do by yourself.
       | One of the hardest things is to maintain an upbeat outlook, and
       | yet it is so necessary because no one is going to hire a
       | miserable sad sack.
       | 
       | On the other hand, I had no stigma whatsoever attached to the
       | fact that I had been laid off. Part of that might have been that
       | the size of the layoff was such that anyone with any glancing
       | familiarity with the place I was at would know that 2/3 of the
       | company were laid off.
       | 
       | One thing that I would emphasize would be maintain your
       | professional network in good times and in bad. I got a number of
       | good leads that way.
        
         | kelnos wrote:
         | > _I had no stigma whatsoever attached to the fact that I had
         | been laid off._
         | 
         | This point in the article was weird to me, that you should
         | creatively avoid saying that you were laid off. Sure, some
         | layoffs are just an excuse to get rid of people who the company
         | believe are low performers, so if you were laid off from a
         | prominent company where recruiters know why the layoff
         | happened, this could be a problem for you when looking for a
         | new job.
         | 
         | But if you were caught in the string of layoffs happening this
         | year (or at the beginning of the pandemic), I can't see how
         | there'd be stigma attached to that. And I'd worry that being
         | evasive about why you're no longer at your previous company
         | could be a red flag to recruiters; just doesn't seem worth it.
        
           | ketzo wrote:
           | Yes, when lots of companies are cutting back to their most
           | essential employees, it helps provide a little cover.
           | 
           | But, y'know, regardless of the environment, what does it say
           | about your abilities that your employer didn't consider _you_
           | essential?
           | 
           | This is a very pessimistic way to view things that I don't
           | fully believe, and of course any reasonable person knows that
           | being part of a layoff is very rarely just the employee's
           | fault. But to perhaps state the obvious, being laid off is
           | never gonna look _good_ , or even neutral. There will always
           | be stigma.
           | 
           | Being able to reframe your layoff in as positive of a light
           | as you can is important.
        
             | itake wrote:
             | To add, usually companies layoff low performers first.
             | 
             | At my previous job, the company laid off 1000 people, but
             | only 3% of engineering...
        
             | quanticle wrote:
             | But, y'know, regardless of the environment, what does it
             | say about your         abilities that your employer didn't
             | consider you essential?
             | 
             | I think it depends on the company. If you're laid off from
             | from a small or medium sized startup, with more or less one
             | product, then I can understand how being laid off can be
             | seen as a reflection of your skills (or lack thereof) as an
             | engineer. But if you were laid off from a larger company,
             | all it means is that some director saw a team (or teams)
             | which were working on more speculative projects, which
             | could be axed as a way of saving money during a recession.
             | It doesn't mean that you're an unskilled engineer. It just
             | means you were unlucky enough to be in the wrong place at
             | the wrong time when the ax fell.
        
             | snapetom wrote:
             | > But, y'know, regardless of the environment, what does it
             | say about your abilities that your employer didn't consider
             | you essential?
             | 
             | In the case of a startup, there's often not much you can do
             | to be seen as valued if you're not a founding engineer.
             | 
             | I've been a part of 3 layoffs. 15%, 90%, and 75%
             | reductions, all at small or medium-sized startups. At a
             | startup, they're going to keep founding and early engineers
             | first. There's a selection bias, but those engineers aren't
             | probably "dead weight" if they were there since the early
             | days. Plus, there's a cliqueness to startups that will
             | favor them.
        
               | ketzo wrote:
               | Yeah, and all of this is relevant, and the kind of stuff
               | you would wanna talk about with a new potential employer.
               | Maybe you did really amazing work with a killer team, but
               | that team got cut as the founders tried to reduce scope.
               | 
               | But... it's still set against the default backdrop of
               | "they kept some people, but not me", so it's important to
               | be able to tell your story well.
        
           | turdprincess wrote:
           | It is none's business about why you left (or are leaving)
           | your previous job, unless perhaps it is due to some legal
           | issue that would show up on a (criminal) background check.
           | Interviewing for a new job is all about the future, and it's
           | totally up to you to reveal only the facts about your past
           | that paint you in a favorable light.
           | 
           | Whether or not saying you got laid off would hurt your
           | chances is a separate question. My guess is most of the time
           | it wont. But as a flip, would saying you got laid off improve
           | your chances of getting the job? If the answer is no, then
           | its not worth saying - focus instead on the things that for
           | sure portray you positively.
           | 
           | The same goes for jobs with short tenures - if you stayed at
           | some place for a few months and left just leave it off your
           | resume. It doesn't do anything to sell you, so why waste time
           | on it?
           | 
           | Just remember, an interview is a short period of time to sell
           | the best parts of yourself that are most applicable to the
           | job. It is not a 100% confession of all the good and bad
           | things that happened to you.
        
         | tnel77 wrote:
         | I have a bit to go before I'm a software engineer over fifty,
         | but I have a lot of anxiety about it primarily from an ageism
         | standpoint. I don't really want to go into management because I
         | love coding and solving problems, but I fear that one day I'll
         | will struggle to find work due to my age.
         | 
         | What has your experience been with this issue?
        
           | Fr3dd1 wrote:
           | I myself lead a software development team. I am 31 and the
           | last two people I hired were almost 50 and they are very good
           | devs. In my opinion age alone isnt a reason not to hire
           | someone. What is the "common reason" older people are not
           | considered to be hired? I guess because people think they
           | cant adapt or are stuck in some ways in theire thinking. If
           | your future you can show that this is not the case, I guess
           | you are fine :) Only "REAL" age related reason is (and I have
           | to admit that I myself didnt hire someone because of that) if
           | the person wants to retire in the near future and you think
           | you want to invest your time in someone who will, hopefully,
           | stay longer.
        
             | spacemadness wrote:
             | It depends on what part of the industry we're talking
             | about. One aspect of this is startup culture and needing to
             | "fit in." Or in other words "culture fit." You see it on HN
             | all the time where people mention many of their friends are
             | coworkers. Sometimes that means not hiring the person who
             | has a life outside work, isn't going through the same
             | issues everyone does in their 20s, and is perceived to not
             | fit in. In some cases, I think it is simply the threat of
             | possibly having a life outside of work and not signing up
             | to overwork yourself by default.
             | 
             | Another is pricing yourself out of the industry. And
             | another is the mistaken idea that all an older dev knows is
             | older out of date technology. The usual stuff.
             | 
             | I've found that firmware and regulated industries in
             | general do not have as rampant of an ageism issue.
        
             | sweezyjeezy wrote:
             | Some IC roles do fit more younger candidates than older.
             | E.g. in a startup - often better they not have outside
             | commitments like a family, or need for a healthy work-life
             | balance. Sometimes "work smarter not harder" falls apart
             | and they need to work like a maniac. On balance I've found
             | older colleagues less willing to do that. That isn't meant
             | as a criticism, just an observation about role-fit, those
             | people usually didn't last long.
        
               | Fr3dd1 wrote:
               | The underlying belief to this is, is that more hours =
               | more results = better results. I highly doubt that this
               | is the truth.
        
               | sweezyjeezy wrote:
               | That's not the underlying belief in a startup. It's more
               | like: we have not fully figured out market fit. We may
               | need to build something very very quickly (I'm talking
               | about hours/days, not weeks/months) and then maintain
               | them for while.
               | 
               | That's why I say "work smarter not harder" can fail -
               | that only works if you make assumptions about the future,
               | in a startup that can only take you so far.
        
               | Fr3dd1 wrote:
               | Okay, I didnt thought about such an early state.
        
           | JackFr wrote:
           | I worry about it too. What I have found is that it's
           | important to keep your skills very, very current. It's OK to
           | be reasonably skeptical about the latest hotness, but it's
           | imperative to know about it and why it's the latest hotness.
           | No one cares (OK very few people care) about the systems you
           | built in perl in the 90's. They will care about your opinion
           | Go vs. Rust vs. C++, even if you are not an expert in any of
           | them. You needn't have used every no-SQL data store, but
           | again you need to know about them.
           | 
           | On the other hand if you are a subject matter expert in a
           | particular domain, then your twenty years of experience are
           | indeed very useful, and while no one wants to replicate the
           | risk reporting system you built in Motif/X in the 90's, they
           | may well want build it in React.
        
           | remote_phone wrote:
           | Over 50 in 2022 is very different than over 50 in 2000.
           | 
           | I'm GenX and grew up with the internet but I know life before
           | the internet. I know technology more than most and keep up
           | with it. I play video games (finished elden ring earlier this
           | year) and watch TikTok 2 hours a day. I'm not young but the
           | gap between me and someone younger isn't a vast canyon like
           | it used to be.
           | 
           | My last job hunt a year ago I got over 5 job offers. I
           | wouldn't be too worried.
        
             | mixmastamyk wrote:
             | Well, the issue unfortunately is that we know that but a
             | thirty y-o hiring manager doesn't. A few years back I saw
             | folks commenting on YouTube about the "good old days" of
             | 2013 and had good sensible chuckle.
             | 
             | Also, tiktok is like smoking--wouldn't recommend.
        
       | clutchdude wrote:
       | > You're probably going to have to fake enthusiasm for the AI-
       | enabled TikTok outfit generator you will be working on. No, it's
       | not going to make the world a better place. Yes, it might even
       | make the world a worse place.
       | 
       | This is _how_ the world becomes a worse place - perhaps if
       | working for the company developing this is life or death for you
       | or a loved one, I can see why.
       | 
       | But otherwise, consider doing something else.
        
         | dml2135 wrote:
         | Thank you for posting this. I really dislike how not wanting to
         | work for companies that are actively harming the world is often
         | portrayed as some sort of selfish luxury.
        
       | btrettel wrote:
       | The author mentions the "diamond-in-the-rough" strategy used by
       | organizations, which in my experience can be particularly
       | disrespectful of the interviewee's time. One thing I try to
       | figure out how before applying to a job is how many applicants
       | the organization is considering for the position. If they're
       | interviewing a ton of people for one position, it's probably a
       | waste of my time to apply. This is particularly true for
       | organizations that use marathon interview sessions (doing a
       | series of interviews over an entire day), and/or organizations
       | that expect the interviewee to give a talk of interest to the
       | organization (common in research positions). Customizing an old
       | talk I have takes several hours. I know that I could use an old
       | talk without modification, but I feel that I'd be at a
       | significant disadvantage to do so.
        
       | gorbachev wrote:
       | The number one thing I've learned from being laid off was never
       | to trust your employer. Trust people, if they've shown to be
       | trustworthy, but never, ever trust a company.
       | 
       | A company is not family, they're not your friend, and the
       | perceived loyalty you think you've "earned" doesn't mean a thing
       | if layoffs are coming.
       | 
       | Treat your employment as a business arrangement. You get a
       | paycheck in exchange for labor. Nothing less, nothing more.
        
         | euix wrote:
         | I second this. Institutions come and go but the people and
         | connections you make throughout your working life is what
         | counts and transcend your workplace. This is especially true
         | for technical people, if you are middle management/executive
         | your skills are far less transferable.
        
         | lll-o-lll wrote:
         | Ahh yes. I think most people end up going through this bitter
         | disillusionment at some point in their careers.
         | 
         | Humans are tribal by nature and companies are setup like a big
         | tribe. We even call the guy (and it's mostly a guy) at the top
         | the chief! Feelings of "family" and "loyalty" are built into
         | humans operating in tribes, and a real tribe looks out for its
         | members.
         | 
         | So when the sudden wholesale internally orchestrated slaughter
         | of a chunk of the tribe happens (metaphorically), it comes as
         | quite a shock (the first time). Both for the people that go and
         | the people that stay. The lesson _is_ that a company is not a
         | tribe.
         | 
         | That said, a company is also a collection of people and the
         | relationships you develop as you work are just as meaningful as
         | the ones you develop in other aspects of life. Loyalty to
         | _people_ is a perfectly good and reasonable thing.
         | 
         | So my take is, you should focus on fostering good relationships
         | with your coworkers and hold loosely to the concept of the
         | "company". The company may screw you over, but good people will
         | always try to do what is right.
        
       | tomcam wrote:
       | Painful to read. Thank you for sharing.
       | 
       | > You're going to have to grind Leetcode. Yes, even the dynamic
       | programming problems.
       | 
       | What are dynamic programming problems?
        
       | autotune wrote:
       | I have gotten laid off, fired, or otherwise managed out so many
       | times in the last year or so I am writing off the whole year on
       | my resume and calling it a "personal development" year and not
       | listing any short term positions on there. 2021-2022 was just a
       | complete disaster for job stability relative to most of my
       | previous career where I was doing 2-3 years minimum in a role. My
       | personal recommendation in addition to TFA is enroll in COBRA and
       | get an in-network therapist. I thankfully managed to survive off
       | of credit cards, debt, and help from the parents, but if the
       | recent role I landed ends up being a dud not sure what is next
       | for me. Thankfully it seems to be going relatively well.
        
         | BuckyBeaver wrote:
         | COBRA is outrageously expensive. If you have no (or little)
         | income, the ACA is a no-brainer I think.
        
           | autotune wrote:
           | My parents paid for it for me and refused to consider
           | anything cheaper, so I was lucky, but yeah, it is something
           | like $700 a month.
        
             | rr808 wrote:
             | For my family COBRA is about $2500 a month, which is a lot
             | when you aren't working!
        
       | parski wrote:
       | SWE does not mean Sweden. I've gathered that much. WTF is SWE?
        
       | xutopia wrote:
       | I just got laid off and I went through a layoff in the early
       | 2000s and it was brutal. Had to do contract work with tech I
       | didn't like and now with the added pressure of having kids that I
       | have to care for financially it's definitely more stressful.
       | 
       | One thing I'm doing different this time around is that I'm
       | building a project that could be useful for some friends and
       | might actually scratch an itch. It allows me to get back in the
       | latest technologies and adds something to my portfolio.
        
       | tayistay wrote:
       | > You're going to have to grind Leetcode. Yes, even the dynamic
       | programming problems.
       | 
       | Really? I would think contributing (significantly) to an open-
       | source project would look better than spending time on leetcode,
       | though I've never tried leetcode.
        
         | ok123456 wrote:
         | That would require the hiring staff being able to evaluate your
         | contribution. Unlikely, unless the job you're interviewing for
         | is interviewing because you made a useful contribution to a
         | software that they use themselves.
        
         | sixstringtheory wrote:
         | In my experience interviewing, nothing on github or your resume
         | will be read. The only thing that will be read is what you type
         | into coderpad during your interview.
        
       | vintermann wrote:
       | > "When faced with two choices, flip a coin. When it's in the
       | air, you'll know which side you're hoping for." --Former gangster
       | Arnold "The Brain" Rothstien
       | 
       | In the TV series Boardwalk Empire, he said that. I can't find any
       | evidence he ever said it in real life.
       | 
       | However, the poet Piet Hein did:
       | 
       | Stejler man foran et vanskelig valg
       | 
       | og vil ha det afgjord prompte,
       | 
       | er det et sare fornuftigt princip
       | 
       | at platte og krone om det.
       | 
       | Ikke at valget skal ske pr. hazard,
       | 
       | i mens man selv sidder og maber
       | 
       | men: lige nar monten er kastet til vejrs
       | 
       | sa ved man precis, hvad man haber.
       | 
       | (His own translation:
       | 
       | Whenever you're called on to make up your mind,
       | 
       | and you're hampered by not having any,
       | 
       | the best way to solve the dilemma, you'll find,
       | 
       | is simply by spinning a penny.
       | 
       | No - not so that chance shall decide the affair
       | 
       | while you're passively standing there moping;
       | 
       | but the moment the penny is up in the air,
       | 
       | you suddenly know what you're hoping.)
        
       | enos_feedler wrote:
       | All of these apply equally well to getting dumped.
        
       | mathattack wrote:
       | Another hard truth... You learn who will help you in a crisis,
       | and it will surprise you. People you thought had your back become
       | scarce, while some weak connections really go to bat for you
       | because of some small courtesy you did years prior.
       | 
       | Going through the experience once makes you more empathetic to
       | folks in a similar boat.
        
       | shufeng wrote:
       | When I was at the spot before covid, I felt very venerable and
       | desperate at the same time. I was junior and just started my
       | career. At the beginning of job search, I tried to tell people
       | the true story behind. However, once I opened that, it
       | immediately became a gossip where the recruiter was more
       | interested in the details than my competency for the job.
       | 
       | I survived it eventually after 6 months but I wish I knew all the
       | truths before that.
        
       | dadoge wrote:
       | Contrary opinion:
       | 
       | If feels very very very wrong to compare a search during April
       | 2020 and now.
       | 
       | Why? The year after April 2020 was a booming job market for SWEs.
       | Hiring managers were competing for talent, 2021 was a boom year
       | of low interest rates, euphoria in private and public markets.
       | 
       | This blog post _should not_ be considered a response to the WSJ
       | article.
       | 
       | And sorry, grinding away at leetcode should only take about 2
       | months tops if you don't have to worry having to balance leetcode
       | and your job, and not a tall ask for a 250k+ job in tech. if you
       | don't need that high a salary, smaller companies generally are
       | more lax about leetcode
        
         | dadoge wrote:
         | Ok looked the guy up: https://www.stevenbuccini.com/about/
         | 
         | - Studied at Berkeley
         | 
         | - worked at Apple and Uber
         | 
         | And I'm supposed to feel bad for you not wanting to spend a few
         | weeks grinding at leetcode?
         | 
         | This reeks of someone who is very well off, and not an
         | "Everyman" engineer.
        
           | bobkazamakis wrote:
           | I actually agree with the parent here;
           | 
           | grinding leetcode is some dumbshit waste of time that I'm not
           | going to bother with -- I've got code to put in production
           | and this simply is never a good use of my time. When you have
           | an obnoxious hiring process that will take multiple hours for
           | your _special_ company, why would I even waste my time? I can
           | click a few more buttons and have offers elsewhere anyways...
        
             | 1270018080 wrote:
             | > dumbshit waste of time that I'm not going to bother with
             | 
             | You're leaving hundreds of thousands of dollars on the
             | table. The hours/money ratio of studying leetcode is pretty
             | good.
             | 
             | > for your special company
             | 
             | At least 1 round of leetcode questions is a requirement for
             | every company I have interviewed with.
             | 
             | > I can click a few more buttons and have offers elsewhere
             | anyways...
             | 
             | If that's actually true, then nevermind.
             | 
             | I hate leetcode too, but I think it's unwise to not
             | conform.
        
               | thebigspacefuck wrote:
               | Leetcode interviews gave me an anxiety disorder for
               | upwards of a year, despite solving the problems correctly
        
             | ummonk wrote:
             | Well the guy who wrote the post had the same opinion as you
             | and his job search took a year as a result...
        
         | throwaway675309 wrote:
         | Anecdotal but over the past 20 years I've held about eight
         | different positions in various companies as a software
         | engineer, and I've never even so much as glanced at leetcode.
         | I've been able to live comfortably and put plenty away for the
         | future with 150 to 200K salary.
         | 
         | I feel like companies that emphasize interviews prioritizing
         | rote memorization aren't going to be a good culture fit for me
         | anyway.
        
         | kelnos wrote:
         | > _The year after April 2020 was a booming job market for
         | SWEs._
         | 
         | Did we know that at the time, though? From what I remember, it
         | was all doom and gloom: public markets were trending downward,
         | people were talking about recession and corporate belt-
         | tightening, and the assumption was that we'd see a lot of
         | layoffs, and the labor market would get tight.
         | 
         | True, that's not what happened (at least in the case of
         | knowledge workers) -- in most cases it was the opposite -- but
         | I don't think we had that foresight back in April 2020.
        
       | drdunce wrote:
       | In short, the SWE job market is not healthy.
        
       | gregfjohnson wrote:
       | Stepping back for a moment from the content, I think it is worth
       | noting what an exceptionally well-written essay this is. Being
       | able to write well is a super power for engineers. It is a
       | reflection of the lucidity and clarity of one's mind, and the
       | ability to understand the needs of the reader. Writing well is an
       | exceptionally useful and powerful skill that can be improved with
       | consistent practice. I would be tempted to add that as hard truth
       | #9!
        
         | crosen99 wrote:
         | For sure. So utterly penetrating, incisive, soulful and
         | relatable. There can be no suspicion that the author relied on
         | ChatGPT for this piece!
        
           | linhns wrote:
           | I hope everyone takes this as sarcasm
        
             | [deleted]
        
         | ericmcer wrote:
         | He is a good writer and clearly a thoughtful individual, which
         | further reinforces truth #6 (honesty can hurt you). I
         | subconsciously approached the article with a bit of negative
         | bias around the fact he had been laid off. His writing has more
         | clarity than many successful CEOs though so who knows.
        
           | theteapot wrote:
           | How charitable of you for the poor laid off person.
        
           | jonathankoren wrote:
           | > I subconsciously approached the article with a bit of
           | negative bias around the fact he had been laid off. His
           | writing has more clarity than many successful CEOs though so
           | who knows.
           | 
           | That's because most people get laid off because of no fault
           | of their own. There's a false idea that people that are laid
           | off are low performers, but the truth of the matter is that
           | more often than not it, it's entire teams.
        
             | mixmastamyk wrote:
             | Yes, and if you're in the game thru a few downturns, you
             | will be laid off during them a few times in an otherwise
             | successful career. Severance package FTW.
        
           | pclmulqdq wrote:
           | As someone who also writes and thinks a lot, truth #6 applies
           | particularly to us. People REALLY don't want to hear hard
           | truths from people who think about what they are saying. If
           | you are saying something that is less thought out, honesty
           | can be a good policy - after all, they have probably heard
           | whatever you are saying before.
        
             | lazide wrote:
             | I will say - most people don't like hearing that. And
             | you'll certainly not be a hit at parties if that's your
             | style.
             | 
             | There is a high correlation between specific types of high
             | performer and people who do like (and benefit) from hearing
             | that type of truth though. At least unless it hits too
             | close to home.
             | 
             | Which is why the article is getting upvoted.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | paulpauper wrote:
         | Verbal and math ability are highly correlated, as suggested by
         | IQ and SAT scores. People who are good at math tend to be above
         | average at writing too.
        
           | falcolas wrote:
           | It took me many years to figure out how to write. Finally, I
           | figured out how to apply that math side of my brain to
           | writing: I treat sentences like math exercises; that is to
           | say I learned how to show my work.
           | 
           | Ironically, I feel that this also helps me identify AI
           | writing since it never shows its work; it has a tendency to
           | mix together multiple "answers" in a swirling morass of
           | leadership-speak (a mixture of management-adjective-soup and
           | the avoidance of direct points). That kind of speech pattern
           | coming from anybody that's not a C level executive stands
           | out. Even executives tend to drop the leadership style speech
           | patterns on forums.
        
           | mbg721 wrote:
           | SAT-type verbal stuff is very different from being able to
           | write well. It's much closer to math with a different
           | alphabet--I've met more than one math major who did better on
           | the verbal sections of standardized tests.
        
           | klabb3 wrote:
           | And the author is.. also good at math?
        
       | ptero wrote:
       | Good thoughts, but (not as a criticism of the author), some of
       | the pain points are at least partially self-inflicted:
       | 
       | To minimize post-layoff loneliness (and not only for that!) make
       | sure you have a life outside of work: the people you like to
       | spend some time with and things you like to do. To minimize
       | money-driven stress of the layoff, build up a cash cushion that
       | can last at least 6 months; with unemployment, vacation time and
       | any severance it can probably be stretched for a year.
       | 
       | And #7, "think whether you want to work for that company _after_
       | getting an offer " seems off the mark. Sure, reject an offer that
       | is not the best and stretch time on a safety offer until you get
       | a better one. But do _not_ go through the motions of getting an
       | offer with a company you have no interest to work for. If you do
       | not want to work for a company at all, do not apply there. My 2c.
        
         | throwawaysleep wrote:
         | > But do not go through the motions of getting an offer with a
         | company you have no interest to work for.
         | 
         | Strong disagree. In this economy, you regularly want to hip
         | pocket job offers.
        
           | anon50118810 wrote:
           | Being unemployed, I can't support this. Keeping an offer on
           | hold blocks the company from making the offer to someone else
           | who actively needs it. Maybe you meant something else, like a
           | handshake agreement with a manager friend who works there
           | that they'll try to make room for you if you ever want to
           | join.
        
           | alocasia-1 wrote:
           | This, and interview practice is a plus too.
        
           | ptero wrote:
           | The problem with going through to the offer stage with
           | companies you do not want to work for is that this is
           | likelier to limit your options rather than increase them.
           | 
           | This is not a very strong prior, but re-applying after
           | rejecting an offer can indicate that you are using the
           | company as a fallback and may bolt as soon as you get a
           | chance.
        
           | erikpukinskis wrote:
           | There's some truth to what you're saying, but it can be taken
           | too far.
           | 
           | If you have the posture of "I'll take anything I can get" I
           | think that actually puts you at a disadvantage in an
           | interviewing situation.
           | 
           | In my experience employers can tell who is actually trying to
           | evaluate fit themselves, and who is just saying what they
           | think needs to be said.
           | 
           | I find it's easier for both parties to make an offer, if they
           | know the counterparty has done their due diligence.
           | 
           | For me when accepting an offer I'm also doing the same,
           | evaluating whether I think the company has actually vetted me
           | properly and has reason to think I will be a good fit.
           | 
           | There is so much mystery in the hiring process, I really need
           | the other party to be doing their half of the work. And that
           | means saying no to opportunities that don't feel right.
           | 
           | That doesn't mean I walk away from anything that's not
           | perfect. It just means I am looking out for reasons to say
           | no, in addition to the reasons to say yes. I think
           | interviewers pick up on that and it helps me get offers.
        
       | throwawaysleep wrote:
       | > Hard Truth #6: Honesty can only hurt you
       | 
       | Honesty really has no place in corporate interactions. The author
       | is way too old to be learning this lesson. The reason you are
       | applying is that you "are passionate about X because of Y" even
       | if you don't give a flying crap about what the org does.
        
       | Chris2048 wrote:
       | Why are these universalized as if they are true of all layoffs?
       | 
       | > Hard Truth #2: It's gonna take longer than you think
       | 
       | I was laid off once and had a new (higher paid) job before
       | gardening-leave was over (two weeks) - OP doesn't say what offers
       | they turned down..
        
       | bigpeopleareold wrote:
       | I wanted to get back into more hands-on work on something. Being
       | laid off (well, not like a usual one, but I do not want to talk
       | about that here) was not part of that plan, of course, but I
       | still wanted to move on anyway. It opened me to accept dealing
       | with the interview process more, which I always found unpleasant
       | and tedious in the past. With that, compounded with not having to
       | go through that for 8 years, sort of stuck with me. I started
       | interviewing before being laid off.
       | 
       | After getting through a few of them already, I feel a little more
       | comfortable of the process itself, even if it meant I ended up
       | with rejections. At least with a little boost of confidence
       | around it (that and seeing my financial runway), at least now
       | pushing myself on this has changed my attitude.
       | 
       | For what it is worth though, my own interest is to work with
       | something that I can improve on what I improve on. Except for a
       | couple of industries, I'd do anything almost, hopefully with an
       | emphasis on Java, as I think the space is a bit more exciting
       | than the many years before now (or that I stopped caring over
       | trends and just want to write programs :))
        
       | hintymad wrote:
       | > dynamic programming problems
       | 
       | Truth be told, most of the dynamic programming problems in
       | Leetcode are relatively straightforward: find the recursive
       | relation or state transition equation in general, identify the
       | initial condition, and then build up the transition from bottom
       | up. What's much harder, at least to me, are those ad-hoc
       | LeetCode-Hard problems that require insights or clever tricks.
        
         | ctvo wrote:
         | You're already ahead of most people interviewing.
         | 
         | My advice if you're currently prepping: Don't worry too much
         | about hard problems. They're much more rare. While true you may
         | get an interviewer who hasn't properly calibrated their
         | question, but more often than not, it's easy or mediums. Invest
         | your time into telling a convincing story about your previous
         | experiences, the impact you made at companies, and how great
         | it'd be to work with you.
         | 
         | During a downturn, Big Tech doesn't send out a memo to increase
         | the difficulty of algo / DS questions. It's being more picky
         | about culture fit, skill match, prior experience,
         | recommendations from current staff, etc..
         | 
         | It's more do we hire Bob who is qualified and could learn
         | embedded software for hardware devices or hire Jill who is just
         | as qualified but has experience in the space. Previously we'd
         | hire both. Now we hire Jill.
        
           | hintymad wrote:
           | Thanks for the advice!
        
       | Tao3300 wrote:
       | I've been in that loneliness before, and don't want anyone to
       | have to suffer it.
       | 
       | One thing we can do to help is have each other's backs by
       | providing references. I've made it clear to colleagues who get
       | laid off that I don't care what the corporate policy says: I'll
       | give you a reference. It's a moral duty.
        
       | w10-1 wrote:
       | Kudo's for reminding everyone of the idea of hard truths and the
       | kind practice of sharing them.
       | 
       | We could all get better at facing unpleasant reality; so much
       | more damage is done by being avoidant, mainly to our own
       | character.
       | 
       | The key question is why recruiting is maladaptive, whether the
       | market is hot or cold.
       | 
       | The answer lies in why no one has really addressed the question:
       | recruiting is spoiled by a culture and practice of secrecy.
       | 
       | The goal is to be fair and avoid recruits gaming the system, but
       | the practice ends up nurturing toxic judgments, tending towards
       | the paranoid and the extreme. Paranoia excludes supposedly non-
       | compliant untrustable people evidenced in resume gaps, and
       | extremism excludes supposedly toxic people evidenced by ancient
       | social media posts.
       | 
       | Like defense procurement, the secrecy that is necessary ends up
       | concealing and preserving toxic practices. In both cases,
       | programmatic application of objective standards could dis-
       | intermediate, so the recruiters/procurement bureaucracies resist
       | and claim essential wisdom.
        
       | Jiocus wrote:
       | What a refreshing and reassuring read of an intimidating topic,
       | 
       | Thank you
       | 
       | ~
        
       | akomtu wrote:
       | "No, it's not going to make the world a better place. Yes, it
       | might even make the world a worse place.
       | 
       | But you will be employed."
       | 
       | With the same attitude DuPont managers dumped PFAS into the
       | rivers.
        
       | throwaway85858 wrote:
       | I'm about to get laid off, there's sliver of hope that something
       | might come through before the end of the week but we all pretty
       | much know now that the company is finished. I dedicated the last
       | 7 years of my life to this and I'm disappointed that the
       | investors don't share our optimism and confidence in the future
       | of the company.
       | 
       | I've been laid off before and I share the OP's perspective that
       | it can be a cathartic singular moment in life that presents an
       | opportunity for re-invention.
        
       | cheschire wrote:
       | > Very few of us are going to bat 1.000 during our careers,
       | especially with the industry reshaping itself under our feet.
       | 
       | This feels like it may be an iceberg. Could you expand more on
       | what "reshaping" you're seeing? Are you referring to the mass
       | layoffs specifically or is there some broader context to this
       | comment?
        
         | stcroixx wrote:
         | Not OP, but the significant change I see is FAANG can't hire
         | simply to keep talent away from their competitors anymore. Not
         | sure what overall percentage of people working in those jobs
         | were hired for that reason, but they'll likely never see that
         | kind of salary again.
        
         | bruce343434 wrote:
         | I think SWE is a very young field. Just 50 years ago GOTO was
         | commonplace (apparently?). In any case I think the future hold
         | some interesting prospects, with copilot and gpt and all.
        
           | SonOfKyuss wrote:
           | GOTO is still perfectly acceptable and common practice in the
           | Linux kernel and other widely used codebases.
           | 
           | https://www.kernel.org/doc/html/v5.0/process/coding-
           | style.ht...
        
       | debacle wrote:
       | I disagree with some of this greatly. Some of it is 100% spot on.
       | 
       | 1. Getting laid of is usually pretty liberating. Everyone knows
       | the company isn't generally doing well, the air is hot with
       | friction, and you probably know you're working yourself into a
       | corner. Getting laid off has happened to me two and a half times
       | now. The first time was in the 2007 crash, and the company was
       | hemorrhaging money and everyone knew it but didn't want to admit
       | it. The second time I happened to quit the same week the CEO was
       | planning layoffs. He teared up thanking me for saving him from
       | having to fire anyone. The third time was one of the worst work
       | experiences I have ever been in, but I didn't realize it until it
       | was over. I called my wife and was excited, not downtrodden.
       | Every day for the next two weeks was full of lunches and drinks
       | and I had to insist on being allowed to pay every time.
       | 
       | 2. This is just good advice. The only things you should spend
       | money on when interviewing are dry cleaning and resume paper. I
       | think my longest stretch was about 9 months, and my wife was
       | forced to go back to work during that time despite just having a
       | baby.
       | 
       | 3. Yes and no. Some people don't interview well. Based on the
       | author's other writing, he seems like the kind of person who
       | might not interview well. In my career I think I have a close to
       | 30% offer rate on interviews (but I'm very picky about applying
       | for jobs). Yours may be higher, or much lower.
       | 
       | 4. This is just always good advice. Set a bar for yourself, be
       | willing to negotiate, and realize that work environment is about
       | 500x as important as what technology you are using. I once got a
       | job at a perl (yay!) shop where I worked for literally 1 day
       | because the environment was so toxic.
       | 
       | 5. Most offers for help come from people who don't know how to
       | help. The author's approach here of direct asks is fantastic.
       | Most will flake on you, but those that follow through are true
       | friends.
       | 
       | 6. Yeah this was a bad move. Don't talk about your exes on a
       | first date, and definitely don't bring up the ones that swiped
       | whichever direction the bad one is _before_ your first date.
       | 
       | 7. If the economy keeps going the way it is headed, ditch this
       | advice in its entirety. Take that job, grasp it tightly to your
       | breast, and don't let go no matter what happens. The job market
       | in a down economy could be romantically described as falling
       | somewhere between a chop shop and a meat market, and the hiring
       | incentives for managers can be pretty twisted.
       | 
       | 8. This has taught me to have a healthy relationship with my
       | career. That post-layoff feeling should be bottled and sold next
       | to the stickers that neophyte programmers put on their macbooks.
       | There's nothing more seductive than confidence, and the clarity
       | that a layoff brings is the best test of confidence there is (up
       | there with a cold sales call, a VC interrogation, etc). If you
       | can internalize a realistic understanding of your own skill level
       | and marketability, you'll be an attractive hire, teammate,
       | leader, etc.
        
       | periram wrote:
       | Would anyone here find it useful if I offered to teach algorithms
       | and data structures, specifically catered towards leetcode kind
       | of problems.
       | 
       | The approach would be (writing it from memory, will revise it if
       | there is any feedback):
       | 
       | First master the basic data structures and be able to manipulate
       | them rather quickly. We will write many small programs to ensure
       | that a one can perform most of the common operations on a given
       | data structure straight from memory.
       | 
       | Then we will write transformations, i.e. being able to convert
       | one data structure into another.
       | 
       | Next up with be problems that requires a combination of data
       | structures.
       | 
       | We will spend a good about of time in graph problems, the usual
       | data structures used to store / manipulate them and understand
       | some of the basic graph algorithms ( MST, Traversal, Shortest
       | Path, etc.)
       | 
       | We will briefly spend some time on sliding window problems.
       | 
       | Dynamic programming, Greedy and divide and conquer techniques are
       | rather simple, but we need to distill it down to a science so
       | that we can code them eyes closed :-)
       | 
       | Order complexity, how to think about it by looking at an
       | intermediate step and calculating how many operations are needed
       | to get to next step. We will dig a little into the mathematical
       | aspect of it.
        
         | Ancalagon wrote:
         | I've got a couple hundred LC's under my belt but I would still
         | definitely appreciate something like this. Do you have a
         | discord in mind or something else?
         | 
         | Currently gainfully employed still, not sure if being laid off
         | is a requirement but I'd like to keep my skills sharp just in
         | case.
        
           | periram wrote:
           | Discord would be great. The parent comment was -1'ed perhaps
           | because it came across as selling. Was trying to help folks
           | here as I have recently gone through the ordeal of getting
           | into a FAANG company.
        
         | mvcatsifma wrote:
         | This would interest me as well.
        
       | doix wrote:
       | I'm guessing #7 contributed to the fact that it took the author 1
       | year to find another job. If you're desperate, you can most
       | likely find an _okay_ job in 3 months. If you don't have the
       | luxury to wait for a "good" job, finding a job tends to happen
       | faster.
        
         | ThePadawan wrote:
         | I'm in similar shoes to the author here, and am glad to hear
         | you show some understanding for this.
         | 
         | I interviewed with a quite promising company beginning of
         | December, only to immediately get the written feedback (after
         | the first call) of
         | 
         | "Well I know a lot of SWE in this town and none of them are
         | struggling to find a job - so if you've been looking for X
         | months, surely there's something wrong with you - and anyway,
         | we've already signed a contract with someone else in the 5 days
         | since we last spoke."
         | 
         | (To be fair to them - I had mentioned how frustrating it was to
         | simply get "no" as negative hiring feedback and asked them to
         | elaborate if at all possible)
         | 
         | I take it as a "well, bullet dodged" moment, but I am not going
         | to lie and say it didn't sting.
        
           | FpUser wrote:
           | >"so if you've been looking for X months, surely there's
           | something wrong with you - and anyway, we've already signed a
           | contract with someone else in the 5 days since we last
           | spoke."
           | 
           | I think letting them know you are currently unemployed is a
           | mistake. Frankly your current state of affairs is not their
           | business. You can always tell them that you are ok but
           | looking for a better job. Very simple and understandable. Yes
           | it is a lie but it is the only reasonable option. Telling
           | perspective employer to sod off and not to stick their nose
           | into your internal situation is not going to do you any good.
           | Telling that you are out of job and looking will immediately
           | put you into unfavorable position. Treat yourself as a
           | business in this particular case. Businesses have zero
           | problems lying to each other / their employees for as long as
           | it does not break a law.
        
             | anon50118810 wrote:
             | There's really no way to hide you're currently unemployed,
             | or at least not employed in the tech field, unless you make
             | up an entire fantasy world. Not only will you have to put
             | the lie into your resume, and maybe provide fake
             | references, but you'll also get tons of interview questions
             | about skills and projects and challenges from your current
             | job.
        
               | ThePadawan wrote:
               | You're bang on - I was asked in the very first call for
               | two references.
               | 
               | Also in this case I really don't mind disclosing - I was
               | laid off because my position was made redundant entirely.
        
               | [deleted]
        
               | FpUser wrote:
               | >"There's really no way to hide you're currently
               | unemployed"
               | 
               | It is absolutely trivial.
               | 
               | >"but you'll also get tons of interview questions about
               | skills and projects and challenges from your current job"
               | 
               | Your last job unless it is 10 years old should provide
               | all of the answers. Any really identifying details should
               | not be asked / answered as the employee is normally under
               | NDA.
               | 
               | Same for references. Reference from "current job" can
               | simply be refused. I can hardly imagine employee going to
               | their boss and asking for a job reference while still
               | working.
               | 
               | Anyways I am independent and run my own company. Maybe I
               | am not up to date about how deep the US employers are
               | able to stick their fingers up that proverbial hole.
        
               | mixmastamyk wrote:
               | Freelancing since 2020, most often working on foo bar
               | baz...
        
           | jacquesm wrote:
           | This sort of thing is pretty common. It happens in both
           | directions, if you're employed job offers line up, if you're
           | available there must be something wrong with you. Highly
           | frustrating. A couple of takeaways: unemployed < freelancers
           | < has a job < has a prestigious job. So if possible and
           | you're on the job market at least fill the time freelancing
           | so you don't end up with the 'unemployed' status because
           | hiring managers are going to see that as a way to excuse
           | themselves, from that point forward they look at employing
           | you as taking a risk, which, as a rule they are trained to
           | avoid. VCs suffer from the same disability: the start-up that
           | has a deal on the table will have multiple parties trying to
           | get in on the deal, the start-up that is just pitching is
           | probably somehow faulty or someone else would have given them
           | a terms sheet long ago. They see no inconsistency in this.
           | Also, you don't necessarily have to inform them of your
           | feelings and the fact that you've been rejected more than
           | once. Best of luck there!
        
           | jt2190 wrote:
           | > I had mentioned how frustrating it was to simply get "no"
           | as negative hiring feedback and asked them to elaborate if at
           | all possible
           | 
           | Don't do this! You're inviting feedback from someone who is
           | basically a complete stranger, who has an undisclosed set of
           | "standards" they're judging you against, and who might not
           | actually be very good at assessing talent. The odds of
           | getting a "false signal" are high.
        
             | anon50118810 wrote:
             | Asking for feedback is okay if you're in the right mindset.
             | Understand that unless you completely failed something,
             | it's probably them, not you, and any feedback you get
             | should be seen as likely rationalizing a decision they made
             | for who knows what reasons. So as long as you don't take
             | the feedback too hard or too personally, you might get some
             | ideas for how to improve your chances with the next
             | employer.
        
             | ThePadawan wrote:
             | I've honestly made enough of a positive experience to
             | recommend doing it.
             | 
             | Sometimes people just genuinely tell you things like "there
             | wasn't enough detail about X on your CV, but we took a
             | chance and called you anyway" - that tells me that I can
             | improve my chances for a callback in the future by adding
             | more detail (if I get that same feedback 2-3 times).
             | 
             | You're right though in that a looooooooot of hiring people
             | also have no clue what they want to see.
        
             | xboxnolifes wrote:
             | There's no reason to avoid information. You can still
             | ignore it.
        
               | [deleted]
        
         | pinewurst wrote:
         | I can respond to this having gone through a similar process in
         | the past few years. There's ok and there's the (IMHO) more
         | common bad. I turned down several offers myself, for reasons
         | ranging from 'not wanting to be the public advocate for
         | something I didn't believe in' to 'discovering the leadership
         | were crypto scammers'.
        
         | sbuccini wrote:
         | Just curious, what do you define as an _okay_ job? Would you be
         | willing to pay the opportunity cost to take it?
         | 
         | For what it's worth, I thought the same. I applied to over 50
         | companies and not all of them were FAANG by any stretch of the
         | imagination. I'll admit I'm not the best at interviewing, which
         | certainly was a factor. But even as I broadened my search to
         | the "okay" roles, I still had difficulty landing work.
        
           | doix wrote:
           | > Just curious, what do you define as an _okay_ job? Would
           | you be willing to pay the opportunity cost to take it?
           | 
           | If I didn't have enough money to pay for food/rent, I would
           | take the first offer. Fortunately, I've never been in that
           | situation.
           | 
           | > I applied to over 50 companies and not all of them were
           | FAANG by any stretch of the imagination. I'll admit I'm not
           | the best at interviewing, which certainly was a factor. But
           | even as I broadened my search to the "okay" roles, I still
           | had difficulty landing work.
           | 
           | If you're thinking about the distinction between FAANG and
           | not FAANG, then we are talking about completely different
           | levels of _okay_. I'm talking about non-tech companies, where
           | you'd most likely be working on internal tools or whatever.
           | Maybe you'd be writing crappy Jira/Confleunce/whatever
           | plugins. Or gluing together one internal system to another
           | internal system, etc.
           | 
           | I consider _okay_ to mean a job that pays enough money to
           | cover rent/food.
        
             | anon50118810 wrote:
             | It would be great if you could share your insights about
             | finding work at these non-tech companies, either here or at
             | my recent post at
             | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34108841. I've applied
             | to far over 50 places and would be satisfied with that sort
             | of thing at least for the near term.
        
               | doix wrote:
               | You're looking for a remote job. The sort of companies
               | I'm thinking of most likely won't do remote. Maybe it's
               | different now in the era of COVID, but I suspect they'll
               | still be "asses in chairs, look busy" type places.
               | 
               | Go on monster.com (or any other job search site), type in
               | "programmer" (or "<language> programmer" if you only have
               | experience in a single language) and start applying. If
               | you don't recognize the company name or what they do,
               | that's good. If you're looking for a consultancy gig,
               | then you probably want to look out for keywords like
               | "government" or "client". If you're looking for a non-
               | tech company, then you need to google the company name
               | and see what field their in.
               | 
               | If you know Java, you can probably search for "Jira
               | programmer" or "Jira developer" and find a pretty cushy
               | gig writing those. If you know PHP, then search for
               | "wordpress developer". If it's python, search "Django
               | developer" etc.
        
               | anon50118810 wrote:
               | Yes, remote only if at all possible. I'm surprised that
               | non-tech companies care about looking busy, since tech is
               | a cost center for them and I would guess they're hiring
               | grudgingly at best.
               | 
               | I've looked mainly on LinkedIn and some smaller job
               | boards, not Monster or Indeed or Dice or any of those.
               | 
               | Another thing is that I'm avoiding complex applications,
               | the ones where you're immediately asked to create an
               | account and once you do they ask you for a ton of
               | information like every job you've had in your life. Are
               | the jobs you're talking about often gated behind these
               | applications?
        
               | doix wrote:
               | > Are the jobs you're talking about often gated behind
               | these applications?
               | 
               | Most likely, you'll start to recognize the different
               | software companies use to track job applications.
               | 
               | My only experience was helping someone out when they got
               | laid off. They had a mortgage to pay, a new born and a
               | wife that quit her job to look after the new born.
               | 
               | Being picky about job application software wasn't a the
               | top of our list. I think we applied to over 500 ads over
               | the course of a few days, basically every single
               | commutable job. I think from those, there were 20
               | interviews and 3 offers.
               | 
               | Some of the software automatically scans your CV and
               | populates stuff. If it can't do it properly, restructure
               | your CV until it can. You might need a few different CVs
               | for different software.
               | 
               | I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but you don't
               | sound very serious. Or at least not desperate (which is
               | probably a good thing).
               | 
               | If you're looking for a job full time, you should spend a
               | few hours a day grinding leetcode and a few hours a day
               | filling in those shit applications. Obviously I don't
               | know you or you situation, I have no idea if this is good
               | advice for you or not.
        
               | anon50118810 wrote:
               | You can judge for yourself whether I'm serious or
               | desperate or not. If your standard is 500 applications
               | within a few days, then no. I can't even comprehend that.
               | Are we talking like 10-15 applications per hour?
               | 
               | I don't care about the software as such, but so far I'm
               | not desperate enough to provide detailed information
               | about every job I've had since I was a teenager, every
               | reference up front, agree to legal statements, or
               | whatever else they might insist on, knowing I could be
               | fired later on if I get any of it wrong, just to maybe
               | get the first 30 minute phone call from a recruiter. On
               | top of this is the simple logic that any employer that
               | puts up all these barriers is probably not really
               | interested in hiring anyway. More work for less reward,
               | so that my time would be better spent looking for more
               | likely positions.
               | 
               | That said I'm willing to have my mind changed on this.
               | Maybe all of these jobs are actually super eager to hire
               | despite being so hostile to applicants.
        
               | doix wrote:
               | > Are we talking like 10-15 applications per hour?
               | 
               | Pretty much, around 5 minutes per application.
               | 
               | >provide detailed information about every job I've had
               | since I was a teenager, every reference up front, agree
               | to legal statements, or whatever else they might insist
               | on, knowing I could be fired later on if I get any of it
               | wrong
               | 
               | Either you're completely overthinking it and you can just
               | omit a bunch of stuff, or you're applying to some job
               | that requires security clearance and they use those
               | questions to prescreen. I remember the application for
               | some defense contractor was too painful and we gave up.
               | 
               | But if it's some standard jobvite or whatever form, just
               | fill it in. Only include relevant tech jobs and your
               | university education (if you have a degree) and move on.
               | 
               | If it's really that big a deal for you, shortlist 50 jobs
               | from those job search sites. Then go to /r/slavelabour
               | and pay someone $15 bucks to apply for you (given your CV
               | and email).
               | 
               | > That said I'm willing to have my mind changed on this.
               | Maybe all of these jobs are actually super eager to hire
               | despite being so hostile to applicants.
               | 
               | It's more likely that at some point that bought a license
               | for the applicant tracking software and they'll use it
               | forever. They probably have it on some default settings
               | so it's not the best for tech jobs. That doesn't mean
               | they aren't serious about hiring.
               | 
               | But those job aggregator sites are a bit shit, they'll
               | have listings for jobs that are already filled or no
               | longer available.
        
               | anon50118810 wrote:
               | We may be talking past each other. I'm talking about
               | applications for unremarkable positions at large
               | corporations where the application forms are either
               | branded by the company or done through something like
               | iCIMS, Taleo or Workday. You create an account and then
               | you're faced with several steps asking for who knows
               | what. The experience question might be "List all past
               | jobs starting with the most recent" with no date limit.
               | Later on you'll have to agree that you answered
               | everything fully and honestly or you can be fired. Maybe
               | I'm a fool for taking that seriously but the meaning is
               | straightforward to me.
               | 
               | These are also the sorts of positions I think people are
               | talking about when they talk about HR being a barrier,
               | filtering on keywords, or how important it is to network
               | around them before applying. So I don't think it's a
               | matter of the company being stuck with software they
               | can't do anything about, instead the hostile and opaque
               | application process mirrors their actual hiring process,
               | or at least I assume so. I'm happy to hear if you have
               | any insight from the recruiting side at these places.
        
           | fatnoah wrote:
           | Coming off my own job search, my take is that the era of
           | remote work has fundamentally changed the entire process. I'm
           | going on 24 years of professional experience and applied to
           | more jobs in that search than in the rest of my career
           | combined. Prior to this year, I've had exactly two
           | applications that didn't result in an interview, and only 3
           | interviews that didn't result in offers.
           | 
           | In this past search, I applied to about 50 jobs and had 4
           | interviews. According to LinkedIn stats, most of those jobs
           | had 30-200+ applicants. The results of those applications
           | were:                 ~12 screens with recruiters that
           | resulted in rejection       ~ 8 rejections w/no conversations
           | ~20 no reply whatsoever       ~ 3 rejects in first round
           | - 1 second round reject       - 1 final round reject (a
           | nearly 2 month process!)       - 1 offer for about 50% of my
           | previous salary, but a more more interesting role       - 2
           | replies indicating a desire to move forward that came 6 weeks
           | after my application, and after I'd accepted a job.
           | 
           | My takeaway is that it's a numbers game now. In the past, I
           | was very highly targeted in my searches, but now that the
           | doors are wide open to everyone across the country for many
           | roles, it's about getting someone's eyes on your resume, and
           | that requires a certain level of aggression in applying.
        
         | coffeebeqn wrote:
         | The bar can get very low! Look into local low prestige
         | consulting companies if you're really desperate for something.
         | I worked at one after moving to the US and the hiring bar was
         | extremely low and I was working there a few days later
        
           | [deleted]
        
           | johnchristopher wrote:
           | I am not sure this apply to western EU thought. N=1 but I had
           | a long dry spell even though I work IT.
           | 
           | I think it's like for successful startups: luck, luck and
           | luck.
           | 
           | edit: And for having been on the hiring side a bit: I know
           | luck's involved, more than people think or - worse - than
           | they want to admit.
        
           | cjaro wrote:
           | I agree. I was hired over a year ago to a similar place
           | that's since been acquired by a Big IT Consulting Company.
           | One benefit of that situation is that a) I can kinda just
           | blend in and do my job quietly without attracting much
           | notice, and b) the hiring bar was insanely low, the easiest
           | interview-to-offer pipeline I have ever fallen through. I'm
           | not planning to stay forever, but they're paying my bills and
           | giving me work so for now, I'm content to stick it out, maybe
           | through the end of next year even.
        
             | anon50118810 wrote:
             | For both your and the GP's comment, it would be great if
             | you could share some details on how job searching with
             | "local low prestige consulting companies" works, either
             | here or in a recent post I made at
             | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34108841.
        
         | dangus wrote:
         | I was about to say the same thing. #2, #4, and #7 partially
         | contradict each other.
         | 
         | I think you can go faster if you use third-party recruiters, as
         | much as I often despise them. Try to pick out one or two
         | individuals within recruiting firms that are not awful. They're
         | out there. Recruiters are given the jobs that corporations need
         | a warm body to fill _now_.
         | 
         | Yes, you can absolutely always quit that un-ideal job and
         | completely omit it from your resume. I don't see the wrong role
         | as a good reason to turn down a job when you have bills to pay.
         | 
         | My other feedback on this article:
         | 
         | I wish it generally talked about unemployment insurance. It can
         | be a complicated process, and I wonder if the author had any
         | success there.
         | 
         | #1 should is a part of the basic life skill of understanding
         | the difference between coworkers and friends. I do have friends
         | that started as coworkers, and they did a lot more than help
         | with the mechanics of getting laid off. I do agree that it's
         | not a life skill that is taught very well.
         | 
         | If you want to turn coworkers into lasting friends, you need to
         | be proactive and invite them to do things outside of work.
         | 
         | #3, I'm just not sure I agree with it. Getting interviews is an
         | excellent indicator. At the very least it means that your
         | resume is attractive. I don't think it's very common for
         | companies to waste their own employees' time interviewing
         | people for roles they aren't serious about filling.
         | 
         | My rule of thumb is that if you get beyond the recruiter and
         | talk to the hiring manager, the company is serious and intends
         | to fill the role. Maybe they get around to it or maybe not, we
         | all know how priorities can change.
         | 
         | #5 seems like a waste of time. Either you know someone who is a
         | hiring manager or you know someone who can refer you through a
         | company's referral system. I think those are the only two
         | activities that are productive. I wouldn't want to get any of
         | those requests in my LinkedIn Inbox.
         | 
         | Writing open source software is a waste of time with respect to
         | job hunting unless you are looking to build a portfolio. Your
         | time is better used physically applying for jobs (which takes a
         | legitimately solid amount of time).
         | 
         | #6, totally agree with that. The author absolutely overshared,
         | and should have known better. Corporations want to know that
         | you can keep secrets. Transparency is almost never in the best
         | interest of a company.
         | 
         | As I mentioned above, I'd only agree with #7 if you have
         | runway/a spouse earning income.
         | 
         | I'd almost replace #8 with "enjoy being laid off." Spend some
         | days doing activities meant for joy, especially if you've
         | exhausted your job application pipeline for the moment. I'm
         | almost hoping I get laid off, I love not working, and I loved
         | all the stuff I got to do the last time I was laid off. I
         | played two video games the whole way through and read an entire
         | novel, which are things I rarely get through when I'm employed.
        
           | anon50118810 wrote:
           | I've had very little luck with third-party recruiters myself,
           | personally. My take is that because the job is theoretically
           | easier to get, there is much more competition, and the
           | recruiters are more ruthless in removing applications that
           | don't meet the exact specifications from their client.
           | 
           | Also it pains me a little for you to say that reading one
           | book is a big sign of having lots of free time. Maybe you're
           | not a huge reader but I hope you normally do stuff you enjoy,
           | reading or not, whether you're employed or not, if you don't
           | mind my saying so.
        
             | dangus wrote:
             | I'm just not a huge reader. It's far down my usual list of
             | free time activities.
             | 
             | Basically, the fact that I had enough free time to finish a
             | book and do all the things I like to do higher on my list
             | was one of the joys of unemployment.
        
         | francisofascii wrote:
         | Yep. Author covers that under #4. "You may have to take a job
         | at a "less prestigious" company." Probably the best advice in
         | the blog post.
        
       | KETpXDDzR wrote:
       | > It [work] is the gravitational center around which the other
       | activities in your life revolve.
       | 
       | Don't let work be most important part of your life! Companies
       | encourage you to, so they have another cheap way to lock you in.
       | Years of work from home showed me that your (social) life
       | shouldn't mainly happen at work. Better find friends at
       | hobbies/meetups/etc.
        
       | Bahamut wrote:
       | Love most of the advice I see here, but there's a few quibbles I
       | have here.
       | 
       | > You're going to have to grind Leetcode. Yes, even the dynamic
       | programming problems.
       | 
       | One trend I've been seeing is the MANGAs have been moving away
       | from leetcode crap - in my org at one of them, I think almost the
       | entire org is against leetcode questions as an insufficient form
       | of candidate assessment.
       | 
       | > Come up with a more, uh, positive reason for why you're
       | interviewing instead of disclosing that you were laid off.
       | 
       | Honestly, as an engineering manager on the hiring side, I haven't
       | seen any negative perception in these times when candidates
       | disclose they were laid off - its become so common as of late &
       | often not due to the candidates' fault that it's a non-issue for
       | us. I know a manager trying to extend a formal offer to one such
       | candidate who revealed that they were laid off. I especially
       | appreciate honesty in a candidate when they admit they don't know
       | something & try to set the conversation around working with the
       | info they have as presented to them, creating space for an open
       | conversation around questions being asked instead of viewing it
       | as a Q&A session. Those tend to be the candidates who get the
       | highest marks from me.
        
       | 0xmarcin wrote:
       | We may revert the hard truths to get soft precautions:
       | 
       | - Always have savings that will cover at least 6 months of
       | expenses, now probably a year (if indeed it takes so much time to
       | find a new job).
       | 
       | - Socialize outside work, ideally have a network of people that
       | work at other companies that you are in touch with. Sports,
       | charities, churches etc. If this is hard, ask yourself if you are
       | overworking yourselves/spend too much time at work.
       | 
       | - Be careful what you are posting on social networks. Employers
       | are more and more concerned about the image that you have on the
       | internet. I propose to have 2 profiles, the first a professional
       | one with portfolio of projects, blog, articles and what's not and
       | the second for your private views (nobody should track that
       | profile to your person using publicly available information).
       | 
       | Also I wonder what the author is doing professionally. I don't
       | see any hard tech articles on his blog. Maybe he is into niche
       | tech or doing some no longer hyped stuff like data science? That
       | would explain why it took the author so long to find a new job.
       | Maybe if this is the case the author should reflect on his skills
       | and maybe change his niche to something more marketable?
        
         | kelnos wrote:
         | > _I propose to have 2 profiles, [...] the second for your
         | private views_
         | 
         | Or just don't post about your views on anything (controversial
         | or otherwise) on social media. Just opt out. There's no
         | inherent reason why you need to post about anything on social
         | media. If you must, perhaps because you use it to keep in touch
         | with family and friends, just post about things that are going
         | on in your life. There's no reason you need to use social media
         | to air your grievances about society.
        
           | SCUSKU wrote:
           | The issue I take with this is that employment becomes a form
           | of restriction of free speech. Unfortunately, the reality is
           | most of us can't afford to truly speak our minds because we
           | need a job to put food on the table and a roof over our
           | heads. Still, even with that in mind, I think the best
           | compromise is to provide strong support of your opinions and
           | not just shout whatever political slogan happens to be in
           | vogue.
        
             | MRtecno98 wrote:
             | Honestly if you're going to(hypothetically) rant over the
             | economic system from an extremist viewpoint(like many
             | people on the internet do) i won't be surprised nor blame
             | the employer for not giving you a job in that exact economy
             | you just spent 2k words ranting about; and you shouldn't
             | neither, if you have any integrity that is. Free speech
             | doesn't mean denying any responsibility over what you say,
             | so if an employer refuses to give you the job over some
             | rational reason regarding what you wrote(e.g. hypocrisy in
             | the example before) i really don't think there is anything
             | wrong with it.
             | 
             | Obviously i'm not saying there are no employers
             | discriminating candidates for a political view which may
             | have nothing to do with the job itself, or that they aren't
             | a problem, but i don't think the number of employers that
             | are actually problematic are enough to say that they
             | restrict your freedom of speech. Just find another, and if
             | you can't, well then it's probably on you more so than the
             | employer.
        
       | k__ wrote:
       | _" If you're like me, work is the primary shaper of your life"_
       | 
       | It's sad to see people again and again sell their life.
        
         | rjh29 wrote:
         | I work to live, and if I quit I would not be lonely at all
         | because I have hobbies and a social life that is intentionally
         | completely separate from work.
         | 
         | But not everyone is the same. Some people derive great value
         | and pleasure from their job.
        
         | ejb999 wrote:
         | >>It's sad to see people again and again sell their life.
         | 
         | Why? I don't find that sad at all - some people really enjoy
         | their work, and it becomes a big part of their identity. What
         | better way to spend you life than doing something you truly
         | enjoy and provides you an income to be comfortable and take
         | care of your family/friends?
         | 
         | I know a lot of doctors, they have spent their entire lives
         | taking care of people, saving lives and generally doing good
         | things. Most of them have a very, very hard time retiring when
         | the time comes - it is who they are. I know several in their
         | eighties who continue to practice because it brings them joy.
         | 
         | While not an MD myself, if I won the mega-millions tomorrow,
         | and was set for life, I would still write code for someone or
         | something.
        
           | chinabot wrote:
           | Plenty do, difference is they just write code and do projects
           | they like so no tick-tock add-ons unless that floats your
           | boat.
        
           | eat wrote:
           | I'd still interact with computers in some way shape or form
           | if I were a millionaire, but I also hope that such an amount
           | of money and free time would expand my scope of personal
           | fulfillment to some other unknown areas of life and
           | consciousness beyond IT work.
           | 
           | Ironically, I think your MD example provides the exact sort
           | of comparison that should trigger some critical introspection
           | for most tech workers. Most of us are not exactly saving
           | lives with the time we spend in front of the keyboard.
        
           | k__ wrote:
           | There is a difference between having passion for your
           | profession and selling your life to one specific company.
           | 
           | If you have passion, you don't need to care where to follow
           | it. But OP seemingly traded a fulfilling privat life with
           | friends for a company with coworkers.
        
       | TheRealPomax wrote:
       | Don't overstep the learning, though. Hard rule #6 in an
       | environment with normal, real people, who actually care about
       | what they work on, is a toxic rule.
        
       | sbuccini wrote:
       | Hey everyone, author here.
       | 
       | Thanks for taking the time to read this post. I decided to spend
       | Christmas break in CDMX[0] by myself in order to reflect not only
       | on the past year, but just how far I've come since I got laid
       | off. This is the result.
       | 
       | Thanks for making all those hours at the cafe (instead of at a
       | museum or bar or whatever) worthwhile.
       | 
       | [0] I'll be here for a few more days if you'd like to meet up!
        
         | axetheone wrote:
         | One of the best articles I've read about the experience of
         | being laid off, thanks for writing and sharing!
        
         | zackfield wrote:
         | thanks for the post Steven. I especially appreciate Hard Truth
         | #5. Most folks end up not knowing exactly how you may want to
         | be helped and having a clear and specific ask helps a lot.
        
         | ChuckMcM wrote:
         | Great article, I really enjoyed it.
         | 
         | Given that you now know what it will be like if you get laid
         | off again, have you changed anything about how you approach
         | your non-work life? Things like non-work friends you hang out
         | with, non-work activities that you do for fun, Etc. Sort of "if
         | I'm laid off again, then I'll fill my days with interviewing
         | and ..."
         | 
         | Glad you're back up and running and have processed the layoff!
        
         | europeanguy wrote:
         | > Only in retrospect did I understand the connotations that
         | post broadcast to potential employers.
         | 
         | So, you wanna share with us what the connotations were? Is it
         | just that the recruiter read "oh, you're failing a lot, you
         | must suck"? Or is there something else more interesting to
         | this?
         | 
         | I'm disappointed that this post is somewhat vague on specifics.
         | But on the one situation that is set up very specifically, we
         | don't get the punchline.
        
           | [deleted]
        
           | mgkimsal wrote:
           | Not OP, but I'll take a guess that it makes the OP look like
           | a troublemaker. Someone who has the nerve/gall/gumption to be
           | so open as to name/shame other companies may not pull any
           | punches when it comes to naming 'company X' in the future
           | after something bad goes down.
           | 
           | Posting "here's a list of companies that haven't got back to
           | me" (which is possibly implicit in an open spreadsheet sort
           | of post) is likely perceived as a troublemaker.
        
             | sbuccini wrote:
             | The connotations I had in mind (although I obviously cannot
             | be sure what the recruiter thought):
             | 
             | - what mgkimsal said
             | 
             | - "This employee is applying to really big companies. I'm
             | not sure they know what they are really looking for. This
             | is a mission-driven company, and we want people who want to
             | be here"
             | 
             | - "This person has applied to 30+ places and hasn't landed
             | a job yet? Must not be that great after all"
             | 
             | - "Someone who posts this information publicly has low EQ,
             | I wouldn't want to work with them"
        
               | TeMPOraL wrote:
               | I'd also add:
               | 
               | - "Oh someone here is treating our company as if it was a
               | commodity. I don't like them."
               | 
               | - "This person is trying to game interviewing, probably
               | best to steer clear."
        
               | mixmastamyk wrote:
               | How could interviewing be anything but a game? I
               | understand some wouldn't want it spoken of however.
        
               | TeMPOraL wrote:
               | Part of it is, indeed, talking about unspoken rules. But
               | part of it is that the hiring managers and CEOs are
               | humans like everyone else - some may have ego issues, or
               | buy a little too much into their company's branding.
        
         | dmitryminkovsky wrote:
         | Super post. Thanks a lot Steve.
        
         | partdavid wrote:
         | When I was laid off in 2010, I found another way in which
         | honesty bit me. Or maybe it was a lesson in recognizing the
         | limits of offers of help, because it wasn't _my_ "transparency"
         | which was the problem.
         | 
         | Of course I had my friends looking for opportunities and making
         | referrals. One of them had a kind of clunky opportunity for me
         | as an independent contractor for their company. It was a
         | lengthy process to get it done, in part because they didn't
         | really have their own contractor infrastructure so I organized
         | an LLC, got my proper insurance, etc. Of course, I didn't tell
         | me other friends about this opportunity because it wasn't a
         | done deal yet, and I kind of knew the contracting thing was
         | going to be short-lived anyway. Well, it turned out to fall
         | through completely, which wasn't a huge surprise; but I found
         | out that the hiring manager had told all my other friends to
         | stop looking for jobs for me, because I was coming to work for
         | him! So I was back to square one.
        
         | stephenhuey wrote:
         | Well written thoughts! I've definitely shared many of your
         | feelings more times than I would have thought at the start of
         | my long career.
         | 
         | Corporate jobs disappeared due to the financial crisis one time
         | and a hostile takeover another time (both of those I was
         | personally happy about). And a couple startups were acquired
         | sooner than expected. There can be upsides, yes, but it can
         | still leave you with months of trying to figure out what to
         | pursue next, and that can be a weight on your mind even when
         | you're making the most of your time off. When you are committed
         | to a full-time job, something you have to do every day, you may
         | dread going to work sometimes or just wish you could hike up a
         | mountain or something, but it helps frame your day and reduce
         | the number of decisions you have to make, so when you don't
         | have that there can be a significant cognitive load trying to
         | decide how to spend your time in a way that others may not
         | understand. "Oh, that's nice, you're consulting, how flexible,
         | lucky you!"
         | 
         | Early in my career I learned about how to come out of the gate
         | blazing fast since when I graduated from college a couple
         | decades ago half of the tech jobs were gone, and I had to work
         | hard for months after graduation just to find a specific kind
         | of application development work I wanted at the time. I was
         | fortunate to find that but many others were not and had to take
         | whatever came their way. But it wasn't easy, and like you said,
         | I found out early that lots of interviews on your calendar
         | isn't necessarily promising, so over the years I've tried to
         | find alternate routes to work by meeting with people inside the
         | company first to find out what it's really like, and how much
         | they want to fill a specific position, etc.
         | 
         | And more important than all the above, I recommend finding a
         | listening ear to share your journey with, someone who will try
         | to understand where you're at! I have some friends who have had
         | the same job for a couple decades and even though they may not
         | relate well, we can still try to share our different lives with
         | each other and it's more helpful than you might think!
        
       | trinsic2 wrote:
       | Good article. Well written and to the point. It's sad how bad the
       | employer / employee world is today.
       | 
       | I have been providing computers services independently since
       | 2007, but had a cerebral hemorrhage in 2017. Which I wrote short
       | book about(It needs some work still)[1]. My NDE came without the
       | typical experiences that you read about, but something within me
       | had changed, I had a really hard time being dishonest and hiding
       | parts of myself from the world (this is how I see it, others
       | might see it differently). During my recovery, I didn't know if I
       | could return to providing services independently, and had some
       | interviews after being out of the work world for about 15 years,
       | and man, had it changed.
       | 
       | My brutal honesty about myself and the world didn't go over to
       | well in those interviews. But it made me realize how messed up
       | parts of the world are, and how the employer/employee
       | relationship is really slavery to forces outside myself. A good
       | book on this is "The Dawn of Everything: A New History of
       | Humanity"[2].
       | 
       | Obviously, its not so easy to extract oneself from this
       | relationship, I had something to fall back on as I redoubled my
       | efforts to continue my services independently. Obviously, not all
       | employer/employee relationships are slavery, but the corporate
       | world and the politics behind it feels like slavery to me.
       | 
       | It feels like we are gradually moving away from centralized
       | systems like these as more and more people realize whats
       | important. COVID seemed like a big wake up call for many.
       | 
       | It's important, now more than ever, that people find what's
       | important to them and start taking small steps in that direction
       | as it seems like concentrated industries that are too big to fail
       | are starting to collapse.
       | 
       | [1]:https://www.scottrlarson.com/books/book-most-improved/
       | 
       | [2]:https://www.amazon.com/Dawn-Everything-New-History-
       | Humanity-...
        
       | trashface wrote:
       | Plan for early retirement even if you don't want it. You may want
       | to work forever, but the jobs may not want you. Already an issue
       | for older ICs and I expect it will just get worse.
        
         | dghughes wrote:
         | I think when I hit 50 my fire went out. I'm not 1/10th of what
         | most HNers are I trod my way through jobs IT or not. As long as
         | money comes in and I can bear the job. I like technology but it
         | can drain you and at some point burn-out is a possibility if
         | you can't recover like you could decades earlier.
         | 
         | Certainly save money now and always especially if young like
         | 20s. Stuff money away learn how to invest. Even if you're older
         | save like your life depends on it right now. Even for emergency
         | funds I'd suggest a year's worth not as cash but something just
         | as easy to liquidate that won't lose much value.
         | 
         | Yes I'd say plan to retire as soon as you possibly can. Or
         | switch gears to part-time work since younger workers will
         | become increasingly annoying to you. You may like them but
         | generational culture clash is natural.
        
         | geekbird wrote:
         | I'm less than ten years from retirement. I still need to work
         | for those ten years, and probably afterward. Yes, I get a lot
         | of ageism, ableism and sexism in my job searches. I don't look
         | my age, fortunately, but having over 20 years in my field makes
         | people want to lowball me or hire a "cheaper" (less experience)
         | person. It's very annoying.
        
       | addaon wrote:
       | > You will have to interview for jobs where you will use a
       | language you despise. Maybe even Java. Definitely Javascript.
       | 
       | No.
       | 
       | Or rather, maybe?
       | 
       | I have been fortunate enough that in a couple decades in this
       | industry, including two major downturns, I've never been in a
       | position that I /must/ find a job on a particular timeline to pay
       | the bills. While my life situation helps with this, I do
       | recognize that luck is a major part of it.
       | 
       | As a result, this line in particular fails to resonate with me.
       | If I take a job doing something that makes me miserable, I will
       | be miserable. Maybe I can put up with it for six months, but
       | what's the point? During those six months, between working full
       | time and being miserable, I will not be effective at looking for
       | a long-term role I enjoy. Better to take a personal bridge loan
       | and keep looking for something that works for me.
       | 
       | We're software engineers. If, like me, having someone pay you to
       | build cool shit is about as good as it gets -- hold out for that,
       | don't settle for doing what you "despise" instead.
        
         | sabujp wrote:
         | I started programming c/c++ then perl/python and i hated java
         | initially, but it actually taught me CS. Java has very mature
         | and powerful libraries, e.g. rxjava and guava.
        
         | mgkimsal wrote:
         | I think you're in a more fortunate position than many.
         | 
         | > Better to take a personal bridge loan
         | 
         | You often won't be able to get a loan without verifiable steady
         | income.
         | 
         | > Maybe I can put up with it for six months, but what's the
         | point?
         | 
         | To bring in income. Pay for living expenses. Pay off debts.
         | Provide for family. Start/increase/replenish savings.
         | 
         | > hold out for that, don't settle for doing what you "despise"
         | instead.
         | 
         | People with families and multiple financial responsibilities
         | beyond their immediate needs often have to do things they
         | "despise", if even/only for a short while.
         | 
         | Your post, while not having anything specifically 'wrong' in
         | it, comes across as a bit privileged. You recognize that luck
         | is a part of it, and you recognize your own life situation
         | helps, but you still tell people to 'hold out' for 'building
         | cool shit'. Not everyone can hold out, for a multitude of
         | reasons.
        
           | addaon wrote:
           | This is totally fair, and I was trying to acknowledge my
           | understanding of these points. But I do have to take a bit
           | more of an aggressive stance on some of this -- by simple
           | virtue of being software engineers successful enough to be
           | laid off in bulk, rather than dismissed for cause years ago,
           | we are in an elite group. Over the previous years, we've had
           | great opportunities, including the opportunity to save enough
           | money to ride through hard times. The amount one needs to
           | save, and the amount of hard times one can ride through,
           | absolutely varies with life situation; and a black swan event
           | like medical bills can destroy any amount of savings. But I
           | do feel like the vast majority of folks looking to get a
           | second, third, or fourth job as a software engineer (as
           | opposed to that first job) should be able to hold out for
           | something that is at least not "despised." And I do hope that
           | those reading this who are mentally responding "nope, I'd
           | have no options" might consider the value of having those
           | options, and perhaps adjust spending vs savings rates while
           | they have an opportunity to do so.
        
             | mgkimsal wrote:
             | Agreed, and I may have been a bit too quick in the reply.
             | 
             | I think age and life situation play a much bigger part in
             | this than people recognize, and I'll go out and say
             | "especially younger people". You can pay lip service to it,
             | but if you're in your late 20s or early 30s starting a
             | family, your financial obligations and priorities are
             | vastly different from an empty nester or single person in
             | their 50s.
             | 
             | By almost any measure, a software engineer with 20+ years
             | of experience - especially someone who perhaps didn't have
             | kids - should probably have months of years of savings to
             | tap in to to weather a downturn. But I've also known folks
             | with 10-15 years of increasing experience who still
             | struggled financially, and it was usually a mix of having
             | kids and limited forward planning that kept them in a
             | 'paycheck to paycheck' lifestyle - often, not even a
             | terribly extravagant one.
             | 
             | Most of the bad decisions I've made have come during times
             | when I was in very bad financial situations. The stress
             | contributes to poor decision making, and it was often
             | something I wasn't even aware of in my early days. I just
             | thought that's "how it is". Even getting to the point of
             | having 3-4 months of savings seemed outrageous and out of
             | reach to my younger self.
             | 
             | And yes... the black swan of a medical situation can
             | deplete savings enormously quickly. Even relatively small
             | hiccups we've had over the years have ended up taking
             | thousands out of pocket that were unexpected. Having, say,
             | $30k in savings can help you weather a lot of unforeseen
             | setbacks - car issue, housing issues, moving expenses, etc.
             | A medical condition may drain that 'overnight'. There may
             | be loads of billing delays/etc which may drag it out over
             | months, but the 'debt owed' may be immediate.
             | 
             | My wife got sick and within a few days, we're in ER with
             | double pneumonia and she's struggling to breathe (scary).
             | $4k owed. I blacked out from covid shot - ambulanced to ER.
             | Another $4k owed. Older me can weather those costs now. 25
             | years ago those sorts of expenses would have been
             | crippling. And these are _tiny_ compared to other things
             | that can happen - my family has generally been quite
             | fortunate with respect to health conditions and medical
             | issues over the years. I know others who are far worse off.
        
       | barrenko wrote:
       | Makes sense that this is the author of "Zillow did not have
       | metallic balls".
        
       | isatty wrote:
       | Not a lot in here about being on a visa: you can do everything
       | right, but your life can be uprooted by work authorization being
       | artificially limited to x days after you're laid off. Getting on
       | a more permanent visa isn't actually possible for a lot of devs.
        
       | musingsole wrote:
       | > Hard Truth #3: Interview invites are a poor proxy for your
       | desirability Just because you're getting a lot of offers to
       | interview does not mean that you are a hot commodity.
       | 
       | Hard disagree. Interviewing is expensive as all hell from the
       | company's perspective. Any company interviewing a rash of
       | candidates is engaging in a weird strategy.
       | 
       | Getting an initial interview is a positive sign that (on paper)
       | you're qualified. Further interviews with the company become a
       | blended signal of your qualifications and being a culture match
       | with the latter becoming more dominant with more rounds.
        
       | uka wrote:
       | If you have to be an employee- nobody is forcing you to make the
       | job your whole life.
       | 
       | Whether you are at risk of getting laid off or not - not having
       | friends outside work is a bad idea.
        
       | stcroixx wrote:
       | I was laid off once and didn't find much in common with anything
       | in this article. I had two offers, not interviews, within a day
       | or two of being laid off. Then 2-3 years later, after their
       | outsourcing strategy imploded, they called me offering me that
       | job back - this was the best part. Knowing they were making a
       | mistake from day one and finally confirmation when the Cap Gemini
       | losers were all shown the door. Maybe this is all different if
       | your skills are more niche, but if you know something common like
       | Java, I don't see any reason to have any break in your employment
       | after a layoff unless that's what you want.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | kagakuninja wrote:
         | Yes, that was me during the dotcom boom. When I decided to get
         | a new job, I had 2 offers after an intense 2 weeks of
         | interviews.
         | 
         | However, once I was in my 40s, it became considerably harder to
         | get a job. I'm now 59, and my career has never truly recovered
         | (and yes, I have reasonably up to date skills). All I can get
         | are contract jobs.
         | 
         | Part of the problem is that I am introverted and on the
         | autistic spectrum. I have never interviewed well, and for
         | various reasons, have not maintained a network of people who I
         | can contact to get interviews. And even when an old
         | acquaintance does come thru with an interview, I still have to
         | get thru the leet code questions. Being highly recommended by
         | an employee usually has little influence on whether I get
         | hired.
         | 
         | At my age, I actually handle the social part of interviews
         | better than ever, but now I have to deal with age
         | discrimination.
        
           | rr808 wrote:
           | I agree, I think so many teams are filled with 20 somethings
           | with a 30 yo boss, no one really likes hiring someone twice
           | their age.
        
       | Beaver117 wrote:
       | I don't know why people attach themselves to their work so much.
       | It's just a job. When you have money, what's wrong with quitting
       | to live your life for a bit? I got burned out but only stayed to
       | see the numbers in my account go up. That's no way to live.
       | 
       | I don't even like tech anymore, maybe it's more fulfilling to
       | start a farm or coffee shop
        
       | phibz wrote:
       | Hard truth #9. People won't stop clicking on listicles, so
       | writers keep using them.
        
       | axetheone wrote:
       | As someone recently laid off, I strongly ressonate with points #1
       | and #5 and the amount of platitudes and empty words (but to be
       | honest, some people were truly earnest/helpful on helping me get
       | through this) involved in this makes the whole experience almost
       | feel like being gaslighted by (almost) everyone. I was already
       | quite aware on how unaunthentic and fake things are in the
       | corporate world but this layoff (and several others in the
       | industry right now) was really something else.
       | 
       | And then companies wonder why employees are more and more
       | "mercenary"...
        
       | beej71 wrote:
       | At the first round of layoffs from a startup, we (the laid off,
       | not the company) started a Slack for those affected. Subsequent
       | rounds added more people. It made the whole thing less lonely and
       | kept up a decent network.
        
       | GoodJokes wrote:
       | [dead]
        
       | ChrisMarshallNY wrote:
       | I liked this quote:
       | 
       |  _> "When faced with two choices, flip a coin. When it's in the
       | air, you'll know which side you're hoping for." --Former gangster
       | Arnold "The Brain" Rothstien_
       | 
       | Basically, you'll know which direction to take, after taking your
       | first step (or you'll learn to fly, after being pushed from the
       | nest).
       | 
       | In my case, this was exactly that. I got laid off from my
       | previous job (after almost 27 years). It was entirely expected
       | (for years), so I'd had a lot of time to prepare.
       | 
       | When I learned Hard Truth #9 _(If you are over 40, it will be
       | rough. If you are over 50, prepare to be humiliated -and not get
       | a job)_ , I was fairly panicky, at first, then, I realized that I
       | had plenty of savings to retire early, and I already knew of some
       | nonprofits that could use my expertise, so I didn't need to stop
       | working.
       | 
       | I really wanted to retire -not to play golf, but to work harder
       | than I ever have, in my life, doing stuff that is appreciated,
       | effective, and untainted by bad management and "fuck it -let's
       | ship."
       | 
       | So I was forced into it.
       | 
       | A number of companies didn't get my work, but I seriously doubt
       | they miss me. They certainly didn't seem as if they would, during
       | the recruiting process, and I probably would have been laid off
       | again, _tout suite_.
       | 
       | It's actually been an amazing five years.
        
       | revskill wrote:
       | Luck is vital in the interviewing game, from moment you apply for
       | a position after finding a company, to the multiple rounds of
       | interviewing.
       | 
       | My thought is, don't rush. Keep and spend more time on learning
       | and doing what you wanna do, go deeper on the holes of knowledge
       | (not for the sake of interviewing).
       | 
       | Good things need time and patience. It's the only thing that i
       | can do, and i can't do more about it about the interviewing game.
        
       ___________________________________________________________________
       (page generated 2022-12-28 23:00 UTC)