[HN Gopher] Ask HN: How did you move on from past experiences?
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       Ask HN: How did you move on from past experiences?
        
       I recently put an end to a drawn-out and stressful chapter of my
       life. It lasted many years and I'd like to get a sense of closure.
       Yet I can't seem to fully rekindle the same energy of my younger
       self. I've bought a couple of books to celebrate, but I haven't
       opened them yet because I don't want to _taint_ them with past
       memories, if it makes sense.  How did you close the previous
       chapters of your life? It may sound strange but I almost feel I
       have to _ask for permission_ to move on. Like it 's not real unless
       I share it with someone else.
        
       Author : Red_Tarsius
       Score  : 189 points
       Date   : 2021-12-31 14:03 UTC (8 hours ago)
        
       | beaconstudios wrote:
       | It's no silver bullet, but focusing on the present and moving
       | forwards is the goal, and a tool that can help a lot of people
       | with that is mindful meditation. The thing you want to try to
       | avoid is dwelling on the past and getting stuck in analysing what
       | could've gone differently. Try to forge new memories and a new
       | life to distance yourself from that negative experience. I wish
       | you all the best and hope you can find the way that works for
       | you.
        
       | siva2022 wrote:
       | 1. Write your feelings 2. Travel Alone 3. See the life around
       | people where you travel 4. Do things you loved to do but could
       | not do 5. Eat less, Sleep on time, Travel to get new positive
       | vibes 6. Be kind to others, Give smiles and kindness wherever
       | possible 7. Volunteer for service and connect with people
        
       | smitty1e wrote:
       | Prayerfully:
       | 
       | * Dispassionately consider life in general and the circumstances
       | that led to the chapter.
       | 
       | * Forgive those who did wrong. Pray specifically for the
       | wrongdoers. This seems strange but is powerful.
       | 
       | * Confess and repent of non-positive inputs you offered.
       | 
       | * Note the Nietzschean effects of being more diamond-like for all
       | the heat and pressure.
        
       | kleer001 wrote:
       | In addition to all the other great advice and heart felt sharing
       | here I would add:
       | 
       | Do some research into the composition of the human mind and
       | heart. Basically train to be a clinical psychiatrist. I know it
       | sounds like a lot, but I don't mean to aim to be a professional,
       | but more of a survey of the subjects would help. Mostly help
       | inasmuch as knowing how your and most everyone elses minds,
       | hearts, and souls work and how they can heal.
       | 
       | There's lot of models. From Jungian to whatever they all point to
       | the same mystery. Dive into that.
       | 
       | The unexamined life, and all that...
        
       | whiplash451 wrote:
       | A few things that helped in my case:
       | 
       | - Set up a notebook and write your thoughts down on a regular
       | basis. Read your past notes and learn to be kind to yourself.
       | 
       | - Find a new endeavor that gets you "in the flow", that you truly
       | enjoy doing
       | 
       | - Find a trustworthy person you can talk to once in a while
       | 
       | - Train your brain to generate positive thoughts by writing down
       | 3 things you should be greatful for, every day. It will be
       | mechanical at the beginning but will become more natural over
       | time.
       | 
       | - Proactively remove things that make you unhappy. Find the worse
       | offender today and remove it. Then move on to the next offender,
       | etc.
       | 
       | Like others said: there is no quick fix. But you can do it. Best
       | of luck to you.
        
       | rtkaratekid wrote:
       | I found myself having to come to terms with the fact that I'm a
       | different person than my "younger self" because of those
       | experiences. I am very very different now. I've given myself
       | permission to move on with life. I still cherish the memories of
       | my past self, but I'm not that anymore and it's just time to step
       | into life on these new terms. Maybe I'll change back at some
       | point? But I certainly don't have to. I've found just such...
       | power? In being able to move on in life. I try to not disregard
       | the importance of the past, but from my perspective right now,
       | the present is the most important and relevant part of our life.
        
       | zackmorris wrote:
       | I sympathize 1000%.
       | 
       | The last 20 years have been very hard on me as a software
       | developer and environmentally/politically conscious person. I've
       | watched just about everything not work out the way I had hoped
       | for. I believe that we've hit an inflection point where enough
       | people have realized that the emperor has no clothes that we have
       | a real chance to start over and correct our course.
       | 
       | I don't know how to help with your specific situation, but I can
       | share mine. I went to college from 1995-1999 and it was similar
       | to movies like PCU, Hackers, Dazed and Confused. I got to watch
       | the internet go mainstream, which I wouldn't trade for anything.
       | Anyone could make money then doing web development, and I was
       | working on a shareware game business. It was just such an alive
       | time, vivid in my memory. The future was so bright we had to wear
       | shades.
       | 
       | Then the DMCA. The Dot Bomb. Bush v. Gore. 9/11. The PATRIOT Act.
       | Middle East wars. Who Killed the Electric Car. The death of
       | research. Outsourcing. Privatization. 100,000 US factories
       | closed. The student loan crisis/bankruptcy exception. The housing
       | bubble. Underemployment. Wealth inequality. Clinton-Trump.
       | COVID-19. Billionaires..
       | 
       | In the hangover of the early 2000s, I felt guilty for partying it
       | up in the 90s and ended up moving furniture for 3 years to
       | support my floundering shareware business. Which shook my faith
       | in humanity and almost broke me. Then a good friend passed which
       | gave me PTSD. I was in financial ruin by the 2010s. Worked a
       | bunch of dead end jobs under continuous burnout and depression to
       | survive. Almost found myself homeless a few times. I continued
       | self-flagellating all the way until the 2020 pandemic, when
       | finally the whole world seemed to break too.
       | 
       | Now a lot of people landed on either side of these issues and
       | hundreds more. Half the people reading this won't share my
       | context or conclusions. But as a whole, I feel that the last 20
       | years have been a textbook example of what not to do. They're the
       | dying gasp of 20th century thinking. For a long time, I felt that
       | they ruined my life.
       | 
       | But all trauma all the time is no way to live one's life.
       | 
       | I've been going through a healing and growth process due to some
       | health issues, a spiritual awakening and a dark night of the
       | soul.
       | 
       | Now I see:
       | 
       | Faith, hope and love. Service to others. The divinity of all
       | living things. Communication. Boundaries. Mindfulness.
       | Meditation. A forgiving and supportive inner monologue. Showing
       | up for yourself so that you can show up for others.
       | 
       | I have my sights set on solarpunk, decommodification, basically
       | lengthening my runway outside of the status quo because I no
       | longer believe that tech as we conceive it now serves the human
       | condition. Somewhat ironically, we've become slaves to idiology
       | and dogma under this secular system.
       | 
       | My current approach looks like listening for anxiety when I'm
       | troubled by a choice, and leaning into the choice that expands
       | possibility. So many of our choices each day are in conflict with
       | what we feel is our life's purpose. But I've found that when I
       | make the choice aligned with my heart, reality reforms around me
       | to support it. Now I look back and see that much of my suffering
       | was due to my own attachments, that I held on too tightly and
       | dwelled on the negative, and didn't see the miracle of life
       | unfolding. I didn't know that we had the power to manifest our
       | dreams.
       | 
       | When in doubt, it's good to turn attention from doing to
       | listening for a calling. That's where I found my faith again.
       | 
       | It's been a hard two decades, I still get overwhelmed and
       | exhausted sometimes, but I truly feel optimism for the future in
       | spite of everything looming over us and the planet. Hope
       | something in this helps you give yourself the permission we all
       | deserve, to start over again and be here now in this moment
       | together.
        
       | jkereako wrote:
       | I used self-examination to understand the value in my past
       | experiences. Once I found the meaning in the experience, I was
       | able to forgive myself and others and move on. I even became
       | thankful for having that experience. The key is to ask yourself
       | questions you are afraid to ask.
       | 
       | I learned this habit by reading the Platonic dialogues. I read
       | them carefully and in doing so, I began to apply the Socratic
       | method to myself.
        
       | mmcgaha wrote:
       | Immerse yourself in something that has a low cognitive load (or
       | at least a smooth ramp up). Watches, pens, guns, calculators,
       | retro computers, model trains, civil war history . . . you get
       | the idea. Geeking on a single topic is therapeutic.
        
       | KennyFromIT wrote:
       | Pain and simple: become busy doing something else.
        
       | temp0826 wrote:
       | Kambo and ayahuasca are great (in my experience) for letting go
       | of past traumas and old/stuck ways of thinking. They'll meet you
       | halfway; as with any therapy you do need to be willing to do the
       | work and resolve the issues.
        
       | aszantu wrote:
       | Byron Katie's work. It can feel tedious but it's the fastest way
       | I know to deal with pain
        
       | emersonrsantos wrote:
       | You dissolve the memory of it, also known as forgetting. It's not
       | real, it was a mental form created by your mind. It cease to
       | exist if you stop to feed it.
       | 
       | If you are overwhelmed by your mind, try to use it less and
       | instead use your emotion, use your body (walk, exercise, ...).
        
       | IAmPym wrote:
       | Life doesn't exist in clear boundaries. You don't move on from
       | anything, you are a new you. It took me 12 years to recover from
       | a close loved one taking her life and I got every piece of awful
       | advice you can possibly get. Every piece well meaning, but not
       | from people who understood
       | 
       | If it feels like trauma to you, it changes you. Eventually you
       | will realize that it gave you skills that you will cherish for
       | nobody else has them, but also habits that are no longer useful
       | and you need to retrain
       | 
       | That feeling of wanting to ask for permission is your body and
       | mind's way of saying 'maybe you should just sit down and listen
       | before we choose what to do next'
       | 
       | It will take time but you will be stronger for it
        
       | rubyist5eva wrote:
       | Time heals all wounds. Part of it is also to just "fake it till
       | you make it". Throw yourself headlong into things, and even if
       | you feel like you are dwelling on the past just act as if you
       | aren't.
       | 
       | I would be lying if I said that every traumatic event in my life
       | has been left in the past. Some things still linger and creep up
       | on me from time to time. You learn to live with it and accept it.
       | Don't beat yourself up for being human. Take whatever time you
       | need to grieve but try to not let is consume your life and
       | identity.
       | 
       | It really is a skill to learn as you age and mature, and it takes
       | practice.
        
       | intellectronica wrote:
       | I've been in similar situations and it was both really hard and
       | eventually possible to move on and continue growing and
       | developing. There is no simple answer. What is required is
       | balancing accepting and integrating the past experience with
       | actually moving on and doing new things. You can't have one
       | without the other, and you can't rush things. Rather, you end up
       | advancing one step at a time across both fronts. It often takes
       | longer and requires more effort than you would have liked, so
       | being ready for a long run is important.
       | 
       | Accepting and integrating the past means approaching it neither
       | through rumination nor through avoidance, but with as full
       | awareness as possible and some distance and perspective. Learning
       | whatever there is to learn. Making peace with whatever happened
       | (and most importantly with yourself). Your past will forever be
       | your past, you will never be able to change it, so better get
       | comfortable with that.
       | 
       | Doing new things, living a new life, that's easier said than
       | done, but can also be fun and empowering when you're ready. As
       | the saying goes, today is the first day of the rest of your life.
       | Exciting! But to avoid "contaminating" your future with your
       | past, you really need to also accept and integrate that past. If
       | you don't, the choices you make and patterns you establish might
       | be dominated by that past experience.
       | 
       | Some people can do this all by themselves. Many don't. If you're
       | not sure, assume that you are one of those people who can benefit
       | from getting help and support from a qualified professional. Many
       | people who did will report that this is one of the best
       | investments they made in their lifetime.
        
       | binarymax wrote:
       | Lots of good advice already. Time is necessary. I'll also add
       | exercise and meditation. And not light stuff - real heavy hard
       | exercise and deep long focused meditation. I'd also suggest
       | getting out and meeting new people, but it's not quite
       | appropriate given the pandemic. Best of luck to you!
        
       | pezzana wrote:
       | > ... It may sound strange but I almost feel I have to ask for
       | permission to move on. Like it's not real unless I share it with
       | someone else.
       | 
       | Why not do that? Share it with someone else.
        
       | eloisius wrote:
       | The past hounds you more the more recent of a memory it is. The
       | best way move past it is to start making new memories. Have new
       | experiences and it will eventually become a distant memory that
       | you can observe more objectively rather than emotionally. A
       | chapter doesn't really end until you start a new one.
       | 
       | I don't have any one big trauma that I had to get past in life,
       | but many painful experiences like the death of a loved one,
       | painful breakup, etc. have taught me to move forward by moving
       | forward. When I feel it's time to turn a page, I usually spend a
       | lot of time journaling so that my future self will be able to do
       | this even better. I follow a new whim without trying to fit it
       | into the confines of my current life. Learn something new, try a
       | new job, move to a new country. I try to do something big enough
       | to alter my sense of personal identity.
        
       | igetspam wrote:
       | I think one of the first keys to moving on is talking to someone
       | who you trust to listen. I can imagine a number of scenarios that
       | can fit into the rather generic question you've put forth.
       | Unfortunately, not everything can be solved in the same way, so
       | lacking details to understand what you're struggling with means
       | there's not really much advice that can be given to help. Find a
       | friend, a loved one or a professional and open up to them. If
       | you're not used to that, go with a professional. While they're
       | paid to listen, they're training to be as unbiased as possible
       | and that can make you feel less vulnerable.
       | 
       | My blanket approach is to get a hair cut (I do it rarely), take a
       | few personal days to reflect (often trying to avoid speaking
       | aloud entirely, so I can work on my inner dialog), cry a bit (if
       | warranted) and have a few drinks a trusted friend. Cutting my
       | hair is a way for me to mark a fresh start, so it's mostly just
       | ceremonial.
       | 
       | Then try and find something to lift you out of your funk. Change
       | career paths. Learn a new skill. Find something exciting.
        
         | spsesk117 wrote:
         | This is excellent advice. I just wanted to add, don't
         | underestimate the haircut. I've used this strategy several
         | times to make clear dividing lines in between various periods
         | of my life. For me creates a strangely tangible distinction
         | between what are ultimately arbitrary points from the outside
         | looking in.
        
       | SAK1230 wrote:
       | I can't really give you much advice, because I'm just getting out
       | of that period (now over 5 years) myself. But I do have one piece
       | of advice: never let yourself, or anyone else, define you by your
       | worst moments in life. Instead, define yourself by how you've
       | learned from them and how that reflects in your current actions.
       | Unlike most of the stuff you'll need to do to recover, this can
       | be done instantly.
       | 
       | Also, to people who suggested moving somewhere else: while I do
       | agree that it can provide a bit of a spark, that's all it'll do.
       | You won't become a different person just by changing places. You
       | need to act on it. I made the mistake of assuming that moving
       | would change more than it did until it was too late.
        
       | saltmeister wrote:
        
       | stavros wrote:
       | Accept that it was done, that you can't fix/undo it, and that
       | it's part of you now. Once you realize that, you learn from it,
       | change whatever you can/want to change and move on.
       | 
       | I'm sorry I can't be more helpful, but my approach is very
       | "what's done is done, no use crying over spilt milk", which I
       | know people don't find helpful.
       | 
       | I have a suspicion that the Stoics wrote about things like this,
       | but reading and internalizing are very different. Still, maybe
       | it'd interest you to read it.
       | 
       | As far as habits go, it's going to be hard to move on, because
       | you're used to something else. Don't feel bad about still missing
       | your old life, that's normal. If you feel bad, you feel bad,
       | you're entitled to your feeling. Don't beat yourself up over how
       | you feel, just accept it and try to do better/take better care of
       | yourself tomorrow. It's all good and you're going to be happy
       | again very soon.
        
       | sethammons wrote:
       | For me, I had a lot of life changes, dramatically for the better,
       | and it was hard. I recommend the book Transitions, Making Sense
       | of Life's Changes. It helped me understand and think about change
       | in a new way and to embrace the in-between when something ends
       | before something else begins.
        
       | bradlys wrote:
       | Gonna be honest here - easiest way is to simply not think about
       | it. It's incredibly difficult but that is the simplest way.
       | 
       | I have a phrase that I used with my ex-wife and with others -
       | which is - "don't dig the groove." Which is a reference of how
       | your brain has grooves but also how memories and associations in
       | the brain work. The more you think about them - the more
       | connected and dug in they get. The best way to move on is to not
       | think about it and let erosion fill in the grooves.
       | 
       | There are various ways to get around these things but I find
       | getting yourself out of what stimulates you to be most effective.
       | If going to certain places reminds you of something - don't go
       | there. If eating certain foods or looking at certain photos or
       | answering certain questions about your life - just find ways to
       | avoid those things. That may or may not be easy or simple
       | depending on the associations but it is something I found to be
       | effective. It might even mean not reading self-help or anything -
       | tbh. Sometimes the best way to move on is to literally completely
       | move on and act like you're already fully moved on and done all
       | the processing. (Fake it til you make it essentially)
       | 
       | I'm speaking as someone who has lived through a lot of trauma.
       | Obsessing over it and trying to find ways to get over it never
       | really worked. Especially because the only way for me to feel
       | like I get over anything is that I'm now in a better position
       | than I was before. So the path forward for me was incredibly
       | difficult but somewhat "simple". In the same way that being able
       | to move a heavy object might be simply done by lifting heavy
       | weights for many years before you're able to move that heavy
       | object by yourself. But there are other more effective ways but
       | sometimes they just aren't accessible for you and there is a
       | satisfaction/pride in just being able to do it yourself without
       | any assistance or gadgets.
        
       | skilled wrote:
       | It's hard to deal with personal growth. I'm about to be 30, but
       | all the way throughout my 20s I was constantly bombarded with new
       | life experiences. Meeting new people, experiencing different
       | cultures (travelling), finding and then losing love.
       | 
       | I mean, it got to the point that it was so hectic (though not
       | necessarily bad) that I had to abandon everything and go live
       | with my family for a while so I can decompress. As it happened, a
       | month after staying at my parents and Covid became a thing.
       | 
       | I did a few changes like moving to Norway in the meantime, but
       | all in all I have used this period to just do normal things and
       | not worry about what happened in the past. And I can relate to
       | this feeling of your "younger self", but I can say from
       | experience that this "younger self" will eventually have to
       | become more centered and mature.
       | 
       | And I think that also helps to weave through life later on,
       | because you learn to let go of pressure of what was or what could
       | be. It's the present where all the action - or inaction -
       | happens.
        
       | loopz wrote:
       | Chapters in our lives are closing and opening all the time. This
       | is a happening all on its own. We get ourselves into trouble when
       | we try to force events, or feelings for that matter. Especially
       | when comparing ourselves with the surfaces of others, we just
       | lack the capacity and omniscience to really do it. So we get our
       | mind into trouble.
       | 
       | It helps to reflect, to revisit the physical and psychic spaces,
       | learn through introspection. A deeper way is through
       | _integration_ and shadow-work, but it depends on how deep you
       | want to go and what you need.
       | 
       | This can happen alongside going into new chapters, pursuing new
       | interests and dedications. If that's not happening, allowing some
       | downtime and not being too hard on oneself, might be a respite.
       | Life is not work, or something to be worked on.
       | 
       | Learning to listening to life, might be less stressful, and
       | require less of what is not sustainable longer term. But if one
       | is filled and overflowing with ambition, that'll be defining.
       | It's a happening either way.
        
       | Demcox wrote:
       | > How did you close the previous chapters of your life?
       | 
       | I actively initiated a new. Not to sound like some propped-up
       | self help book, but I found, from personal experience, that the
       | "I" in one self absolutely needs to make a decision to move on.
       | You create with your thoughts and when you decide to embark on a
       | new chapter - you will move on.
       | 
       | I've always identified stagnation/standstill as a state similar
       | to death. Humans live by moving; both physically and
       | mentally/psychologocially.
        
       | wantsanagent wrote:
       | Purposeful disassociation! In concentration practice / meditation
       | you develop a skill of observing sensations, thoughts, and
       | feelings, observing them and then reorienting your focus
       | elsewhere.
       | 
       | As part of this practice you can get really good about stepping
       | outside of negative feelings. Observing them as a third party and
       | developing the ability to acknowledge them without engagement,
       | and the ability to refocus on something else is _very_ freeing.
       | Eventually you have a reflexive reaction to distractions and
       | negative thoughts that allows them to be but to slide off you and
       | refocus.
        
       | ravenstine wrote:
       | You don't completely get over anything, but I have a strategy
       | that has at least mitigated some of the long term damage from
       | past events in my life.
       | 
       | This will seem bizarre, but bear with me.
       | 
       |  _If I can_ , when an upsetting memory pops up, I try to find a
       | reason to laugh at it, or force myself to dismissively laugh at
       | it, and then I file that memory back into my brain and move on.
       | 
       | The long-term effect of this is that to some extent I can detach
       | myself from the emotions I had in the moment and just be able to
       | recall these events more objectively. Because I force myself to
       | laugh at events long since passed, the more I do it, the less I
       | associate the memory with the original emotion. Eventually I
       | don't need the strategy and can think about an incident
       | rationally without spiraling out of control emotionally.
       | 
       | Of course this may not be possible for some memories, and I don't
       | necessarily recommend it. If a troubling memory involves being
       | bullied, it can help, in my experience. Anything involving regret
       | or guilt, not so much; in those cases it's better to make them
       | right if you can and otherwise accept it.
        
         | 55555 wrote:
         | Based on my armchair understanding of how memories are recalled
         | and stored, I can see how this might work very well for old
         | memories associated with negative emotion. For similar, look up
         | "Traumatic memory reactivation propanolol".
        
       | gdubs wrote:
       | Meditation. Amazing how quickly even a few deep breaths can make
       | you aware that there really only is "now" and that past and
       | future are illusions.
        
       | taylortrusty wrote:
       | I did a one week ayahuasca retreat that changed my life. Highly
       | recommend if one feels stuck or has things to get through.
       | 
       | Years of therapy also helped me.
        
       | stanrivers wrote:
       | Honestly, if your brain is still being bothered by those
       | experiences, I have found it means that I have not dealt with
       | those experiences enough. There is something "unfinished" with
       | that experience that my brain can't figure out, so it keeps
       | circle back through it. Especially for traumatic things or big
       | events...
       | 
       | I'm just an average joe with no relevant background here, but I
       | think the purpose of memory is to help you go through similar
       | experiences in the future more efficiently / correctly / with
       | good outcomes.
       | 
       | So I think that the brain is trying to learn from those
       | experiences. And if it wont let go, you should help it. Sit down
       | and write out what you are thinking. Talk out loud to yourself.
       | or to someone else you trust. Think about that event a lot. Think
       | about what it taught you. What you want to repeat in the future.
       | What you don't. Write about it some more.
       | 
       | At least on my end, that helps. Good luck.
        
         | rambambram wrote:
         | > Honestly, if your brain is still being bothered by those
         | experiences, I have found it means that I have not dealt with
         | those experiences enough. There is something "unfinished" with
         | that experience that my brain can't figure out, so it keeps
         | circle back through it. Especially for traumatic things or big
         | events...
         | 
         | I would like to second this. Human beings are really good in
         | putting stuff away in their head and convincing themselves
         | things are okay when they aren't.
        
       | jacquesm wrote:
       | Change of scene. Move to a different place where you're not
       | continuously bombarded with memories. The further the better. You
       | can always come back when you feel that you have found your
       | balance again.
        
       | gorgoiler wrote:
       | Perhaps, without realising it, you are experiencing grief.
       | 
       | We usually experience grief alongside death, but it is a feeling
       | that can accompany many kinds loss -- a breakup with a friend, or
       | moving away from an old way of life.
       | 
       | Labels don't fix everything, but there have been times in my life
       | where recognising hidden grief has been a helpful first step to
       | recovery.
        
       | satisfice wrote:
       | Read "Man's Search for Meaning" by Victor Frankl
        
       | stevenfoster wrote:
       | Reading Viktor Frankl's man search for meaning really helped me.
       | I also sought professional help for a time.
       | 
       | My take away is that pain and suffering can have meaning and that
       | meaning, that power of experience, can be a gift of intercession
       | for others.
       | 
       | Your last sentence is telling, "it's not real unless I share it
       | with someone else." Don't wait. Time isn't the answer. No one is
       | promised tomorrow. Your experience is a superpower now that can
       | be a gift to another person.
       | 
       | The golden rule is diagnostic, you will love others the way you
       | love yourself.
       | 
       | Finally, learn how to make really good tacos. I'm Mexican so I'm
       | biased but maybe if you're not Mexican your people have a
       | beautiful food too that you can learn how to make and share with
       | others. If not, we freely have open sourced the taco for all
       | peoples so feel free to start there. The gift of good food and
       | caring conversation is one of the best parts of being alive.
       | 
       | My best to you and may you be abundantly blessed.
        
       | wolverine876 wrote:
       | Here is one perspective, unvarnished:
       | 
       | Those experiences are now part of you. Love yourself, including,
       | without exception, hesitation, or restraint, the pain and scars.
       | Genuinely care about them, as if they are truly important in the
       | world, because they are (even if others won't see it). Someone
       | wise once said to me, love them; if you try to suppress them or
       | fight them or ignore them, you will be a slave to them.
       | 
       | I'm not saying, dedicate your life to them. I'm saying that if
       | you don't love them, you will dedicate your life to them. What I
       | suggest will be painful - I'm not offering a panacea; facing such
       | emotions is painful without qualification. IMHO a defining aspect
       | of aging is that you gather those wounds and scars - you become
       | fundamentally different than someone younger - and one thing that
       | defines our lives is what we do with them, how we carry them with
       | us. Some pull away from life, to degrees, some turn to drugs,
       | some lash out, people adopt myriad coping strategies, and some
       | grow and become more faceted and maybe wise, though not without
       | consciously making the effort, which is challenging. I think we
       | also can learn our limitations and strengths, after running full
       | speed, head first into walls in youth, heedless of consequences,
       | now we can know a little more and choose when, where and how.
        
       | mef51 wrote:
       | Share it with someone you trust. Trauma is disconnective,
       | connection with others heals.
        
       | murrayb wrote:
       | * Seek professional help.
       | 
       | * Build a daily routine of constructive activities (exercise,
       | journal, meditate, cook etc)
       | 
       | * Focus on creating a future you would like.
       | 
       | * Find things to be grateful for every day.
       | 
       | * Don't indulge in your negative thoughts; notice them,
       | acknowledge them, keep going.
       | 
       | Good luck with it, you got this.
        
         | lbriner wrote:
         | Echo: Seek professional help.
         | 
         | You might be struggling just "because" and you need time to get
         | over your experience but there might be an underlying cause
         | that makes you unable to get past it (or at least makes it much
         | harder). A professional can help you frame your experience and
         | draw out anything unresolved.
        
         | JohnBooty wrote:
         | Build a daily routine of constructive          activities
         | (exercise, journal, meditate, cook etc)
         | 
         | If anybody is struggling with this extremely positive practice,
         | I have a suggestion: start with _really_ small activities. Give
         | yourself credit for every victory no matter how small.
         | 
         | When I was "between jobs" my daily routine checklist started
         | with:
         | 
         | - Get out of bed
         | 
         | - Hydrate (at least 1L per day, 2L was a stretch goal)
         | 
         | - Take vitamins
         | 
         | - Brush teeth
         | 
         | There was more on the checklist, like actual exercise and
         | training projects. But having "easy wins" really helped me
         | build positive momentum IME.
        
         | nataz wrote:
         | I'm surprised more people didn't recommend this. If you have
         | the resources, I highly recommend some kind of professional
         | help.
         | 
         | Think of it this way. As individuals we (hopefully) have a
         | limited experience set dealing with recovery from significant
         | trauma. A professional will see these kinds of things on a
         | regular basis, and may be able to recommend a course of action
         | tailored to you and your specific circumstances.
         | 
         | They may not be the fix, but they can be a shortcut to finding
         | the path to feeling better.
        
       | Intermernet wrote:
       | There isn't a quick fix. Time is the answer.
       | 
       | My parents were murdered 16 years ago. I spent 10 years before I
       | could adequately deal with this. CBT was incredibly beneficial
       | once I found the right person, but it took a long time to find
       | them.
       | 
       | The previous chapters of your life cannot be closed. They can
       | only be learnt from.
       | 
       | Remember that life is short and you can waste a lot of it in a
       | bad state.
       | 
       | Talk to friends, do memorable things, try to be a good person.
       | 
       | Do whatever works for you, and ignore negativity. Sport,
       | learning, activism, religion? Whatever works.
       | 
       | Golden rule is don't harm yourself, and don't harm others.
        
         | Trufa wrote:
         | Low key incredible advice. Thank you.
        
         | moralestapia wrote:
         | I am truly sorry for what you had to go through, big hug to you
         | and other's here sharing their stories.
         | 
         | I'm sure you already know this, but I'd like to say it
         | explicitly to others that may find it helpful as well -> never
         | forget that life is an infinite display of possibilities, as
         | the saying goes, _it ain 't over 'til it's over_.
         | 
         | You can always start from scratch, there will always be new
         | people/places to try new things with and your past experiences
         | do NOT necessarily define what your future will be like (this
         | goes both ways, so be careful).
         | 
         | Some people make it through extremely harsh life events and,
         | contrary to some dumb but widespread belief, don't come out of
         | it by becoming permanently angry and resented. A big chunk of
         | them become very sensitive and wise human beings, with a strong
         | wish to help others going through similar grievances. Be open
         | to accept their help and advice in times of need. It took me a
         | while to understand this and neglecting it only made my hard
         | times worse. We are a social animal and also remarkably similar
         | to each other.
         | 
         | Best wishes to all on this new year's eve, I hope you get a
         | chance to treat yourselves to a nice moment and company as we
         | start our 2022 together! Cheers!
        
         | roeles wrote:
         | Agree with this. Acknowledge-Forgive-Learn.
         | 
         | What worked for me a few years ago:
         | 
         | 1. Drop any goals you have outside of work. One day at a time.
         | 
         | 2. Allow for extended idle time. Allow yourself to just "be".
         | 
         | 3. Do what feels right in this idle time, which in my case was:
         | - Spend lots of time in nature. Take walks.            - Write
         | letters to people involved in the matter. I didn't send the
         | letters.            - Meditate
        
         | ycuser2 wrote:
         | 10 years seems to be a good estimate how long it take to deal
         | with extreme experiences.
         | 
         | In my experience it also was 10 years since I could handle
         | similar situations. I have also heard this number from others
         | often.
        
           | ljm wrote:
           | I'm at 10 years now, pretty much to the week, although I
           | would also say that it wasn't a linear progression from year
           | 0 to now, as if you're gradually recovering from an illness.
           | For every leap forward in my own process there were some
           | major, _major_ regressions, right up to 2018 /2019.
           | 
           | I'm not sure I'd call this moving on. More like learning how
           | to cope, and be more resilient. The closure, if any, was I
           | have what I need with myself and I don't need to get it from
           | the people who hurt me. So I'm happy, all things considered.
           | 
           | Basically sharing this to say that even if 10 years seems to
           | average out, our path through it will likely be quite
           | different.
        
           | higeorge13 wrote:
           | 10 years was my number as well.
        
           | citizenpaul wrote:
           | I've come to the horrible realization that the trauma part of
           | the brain runs on some sort of 10 year cycle. I'm not a
           | doctor but it must be some sort of memory/function/process
           | that the brain slowly modifies over the course of a decade
           | before it decides to move it out of daily use to long term
           | memory. There doesn't seem to be anything you can do to speed
           | it up either.
        
             | stadium wrote:
             | Trauma gets locked into the body too, not just the brain.
             | 
             | EMDR therapy helps process trauma for some.
        
           | kylesteger wrote:
           | I too am resolving trauma from 10 years ago that I couldn't
           | quite face
        
         | prox wrote:
         | Another golden rule I found is to stop trying to "win" , that
         | is a too competitive state of mind. It creates so much stress
         | and you will forget the more poetic and sensual / analog parts
         | of life that can bring much contentment and sometimes joy.
         | 
         | A bit of sportslike ambition is never wrong, just don't overdo
         | it or take it too seriously.
        
         | hangonhn wrote:
         | Another vote for CBT.
         | 
         | I had two painful periods of my life that lead to depressions.
         | The first one I dealt with more or less on my own -- basically
         | waiting it out. Eventually I got better and moved on but it
         | took a while.
         | 
         | The second time I went to a therapist almost immediately and
         | the duration was much shorter. More importantly, the therapist
         | helped unpack a lot of stuff for me and gave me a lot of tools
         | for dealing with events and their associated emotions. I think
         | CBT would work particularly well for this crowd since a lot of
         | it is reasoning based. The basic idea, to me at least, is that
         | our emotional responses can be reasoned with or about. If
         | others are like me, I think some of us might harbor mistaken
         | notions that we are more rational than average and thus don't
         | have any misguided tendencies or thinking. CBT was a revelation
         | to me. I learned to better observe my own emotions and also my
         | own "thinking traps", etc. It has helped me better "manage"
         | myself and prevent me from letting events drag me into another
         | depression.
         | 
         | Someone else mentioned forgiveness and that helped me a lot in
         | my own recovery as well. Forgiveness can be applied to others
         | and ourselves. It's ultimately a very enlightening practice.
         | 
         | Best of luck to the OP and others dealing with pain. Closing a
         | chapter on life is very hard but it can also be liberating and
         | a path to other great things in life.
        
         | bag_boy wrote:
         | Sorry to hear about your parents.
         | 
         | I agree with your point about not harming yourself. After my
         | first parent died, I tried to pretend like it never happened. I
         | drank heavily to ignore the pain. Drinking affected my own
         | physical and mental health. It was tough to break out of that
         | cycle - it took about a year.
         | 
         | After my second parent died, I acknowledged the pain and tried
         | to embrace the grief. I didn't drink or take drugs - when a
         | memory came to me, I just let it ride. That was a much
         | healthier grieving experience.
        
           | ethbr0 wrote:
           | If you don't mind me asking, and it isn't too painful, what
           | was the thought that initiated drinking?
           | 
           | I've always been curious, because while substance abuse
           | hasn't been a feature of my life, I'm suspicious I have other
           | outlets (that I'd like to recognize).
           | 
           | So what were the steps between (daily life stuff) and (I'm
           | taking that first drink)? Resignation, sadness, boredom,
           | lethargy, habit? Anything that I could watch out for in my
           | own life? Any insight appreciated, and glad you feel
           | healthier now.
        
         | lighthammer wrote:
         | Sorry to hear this and hope others can also learn from your
         | advice.
        
       | arkitaip wrote:
       | It can take years to rebound from a very stressful period. I'm
       | sure this is what I experienced years ago when I quit a very
       | stressful and generally bad job. Just years of not feeling
       | particularly interested in anything, being alienated, etc.
        
         | kylixz wrote:
         | I just did this. It has only been a few months and I keep
         | beating myself up about not being productive enough since
         | quitting or things I should have done to stay and make things
         | better.
         | 
         | At the end of the day, those that are close to me tell me it
         | was the right choice and I do feel like it was to get out of a
         | hostile job that up until the last few years I truly loved. The
         | loss of some of my closest coworkers has been hard -- but
         | connecting more with my family has been lovely and made me
         | realize how much I was missing in the pursuit of "work."
        
           | arkitaip wrote:
           | Don't feel bad about leaving a bad workplace, you really
           | don't owe them to fix their broken practices.
           | 
           | I'm glad that you found a silver lining in your terrible
           | experience by connecting more with your family. Unhealthy
           | workplaces really tend to distort our priorities in life.
        
       | tomhoward wrote:
       | I'be been using this subconscious healing approach:
       | 
       | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=29701855
       | 
       | I've used it almost every day at times, but need it much less
       | these days, having processed resolved so much of what used to
       | affect me.
       | 
       | I find it's effective because it's systematic; the feelings you
       | have in your body when you think of the issue points you to the
       | subconscious charge that needs to be identified and processed.
       | And as long as those feelings are there, there is more work that
       | can be done.
       | 
       | It can take a long time to work through everything (I'm still
       | working on things after nearly 10 years - i.e. early life family
       | stuff), but it's so so worth the effort and patience.
        
       | PaulHoule wrote:
       | One element is moral accounting. You have to make peace with what
       | you did. Research on why some people come home from wars and are
       | O.K. and others aren't point to this as the difference
       | 
       | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moral_injury
       | 
       | It's traumatic to be hurt by people, but devastating to hurt
       | others or believe you hurt others, particularly if you were
       | driven to do it by group dynamics. (Nothing hurts more than being
       | part of a network of wrongdoers, part of the problem is not
       | knowing if the locus is inside or outside yourself.)
       | 
       | Last year I was involved in something almost indescribable,
       | probably the best description is that I am rewiring myself to
       | increase my ability to emotionally communicate with and charm
       | people.
       | 
       | Many things went right and wrong, but after charming many members
       | of a group I said something really hurtful to one member.
       | 
       | It's funny because I sometimes do a good job of telling stories
       | and sometimes I don't. Sometimes I tell the punch line of a joke
       | before the set-up.
       | 
       | This time I succeeded, I wove together several threads to tell a
       | powerful story about my own pain and loss, another person's
       | suffering, and the related problems in a wider community. The
       | effect on the other person was almost like a physical impact and
       | that person hasn't talked to me since.
       | 
       | I feel bad about hurting that person also feel bad because this
       | mistake and a string of similar mistakes of lesser magnitude
       | caused my self-interested plans to fail not just in a specific
       | way (with that particular group), but in a generic way (would
       | have failed with any group and any goal.)
       | 
       | In the process of refreshing my practice it realized I hadn't
       | ensorcelled anyone since that day. I'd left my power behind at
       | that incident. Even though it will be hard to open a dialogue
       | with that person I have to apologize and make amends because I
       | need my power back.
        
         | csdvrx wrote:
         | You can also use power for good you know...
        
           | PaulHoule wrote:
           | That's the goal. If I could tell stories that make people
           | feel good as effectively as I hurt that person I'd be the
           | spellbinder that I want to be.
           | 
           | Sometimes though my hostility leaks out and gets me in
           | trouble. I have a chart that looks something like
           | 0 ... resentment ... 30 ... anger ... 100 ... rage
           | 
           | at 100 I start to think about wanting to make people suffer
           | and I am in danger of "losing my shit". I learned in the last
           | few months that if I flooded myself with feelings of sadness
           | that I could avoid "losing my shit" near and slightly beyond
           | the 100 threshold. This could be connecting with my own
           | feelings of grief and loss (often another interpretation of
           | what I am angry about) or if that doesn't flow that going to
           | the war memorial and reading the names.
           | 
           | I also discovered that after doing that I would talk to
           | people about what was bothering me and get a much better
           | response, people would really want to help me.
           | 
           | I didn't find this technique talked about much in the western
           | literature but found out it was widely known hundreds of
           | years ago in China that sadness suppresses anger and that
           | fear promotes it. (It is fascinating to watch shows like
           | _Three Kingdoms_ where warriors, very tough and masculine
           | men, regularly cry, both a few tears and uncontrollably.)
           | 
           | (Western literature does, of course, say that connecting with
           | grief is healing. Also when I was taking acting lessons years
           | ago I found that sadness was one of the strongest emotional
           | preparations for me.)
           | 
           | These days though it is the other side of that scale that
           | bothers me, enough that I am thinking how to redraw it.
           | (maybe with a log scale) Below some point (say 30) the object
           | of anger is not in the front of my consciousness but my
           | resentment leaks out in insensitive, brutish and hostile
           | actions that drive people away, such as the conversation I
           | talked about.
           | 
           | What's difficult about that one is that it doesn't matter if
           | I am 20% angry, 2% angry, even 0.02% angry. If I am resentful
           | at all it leaks out in ways that have a negative impact on
           | myself and others. To really reclaim my ability I need to get
           | to 0% angry.
        
       | cryptica wrote:
       | I think it's hard to move on from negative or traumatic
       | experiences before you can make sense of them. There is usually
       | something to be learned so it makes sense to try to understand
       | your past in order to avoid getting caught up in a trap again.
       | 
       | I've had some very negative, strange experiences over the past
       | few years (in my professional life) but somehow I feel that the
       | learning experience might be worth it... I think you need to take
       | certain lessons with a grain of salt though.
        
       | k__ wrote:
       | Mostly by changing my (social) environment.
       | 
       | Doing something that interests me. Haning out with new people.
       | Basically trying to remove everything that reminds me of the
       | previous chapter.
       | 
       | After some time I can go back and don't feel bad about it
       | anymore.
        
       | whiplash451 wrote:
       | I found "Stumbling on Happiness" by Daniel Gilbert a useful book
       | to help me move on with challenges in my life. He has videos on
       | youtube too.
        
       | cols wrote:
       | This year, my (not so little) brother committed suicide in an
       | alcohol induced stupor. He did it in his living room while his
       | wife and young children were home, sleeping.
       | 
       | Therapy has been a life saver. The only true way to get "over"
       | trauma or hardship is to get through. There is no getting "over"
       | horrible things that happen to you. You just have to keep on
       | moving forward, one foot in front of the other.
       | 
       | In the meantime, as other have said, find a passion or a hobby
       | that you can pour some time into. Personally, I've found
       | exercise, reading, spending time with my children (and his
       | children), and practicing Stoicism to be very beneficial.
       | 
       | We look for clean lines of demarcation between life events a lot
       | of times, but really, we can't extricate the future from the past
       | so easily. All of us are, in some way, impacted by these
       | critical, good or bad events. There is no escaping this impact;
       | No human is immune to them. I've found the words of Marcus
       | Aurelius to be particularly helpful:
       | 
       | "Here is a rule to remember in future, when anything tempts you
       | to feel bitter: not 'This is misfortune,' but 'To bear this
       | worthily is good fortune.'"
       | 
       | Good luck.
        
         | taylortrusty wrote:
         | I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine.
        
       | ModernMech wrote:
       | I moved to a new place. New town new job new house new friends.
       | It's hard to live in the past when everything around you is
       | different.
        
       | pizza wrote:
       | Use your external and internal senses. I believe that you already
       | know much better than we do what you need - including the
       | possible answer "to take a lot longer to further understand my
       | feelings".
       | 
       | If you feel like you've lost something, ask yourself what. And if
       | you feel that you need to be free of the past, ask yourself why.
       | And if you don't understand why you are seeking permission, ask
       | yourself what you make of that.
       | 
       | Perhaps I may suggest that you think about if you feel confident
       | about your needs and what they are while also balancing them with
       | the needs of others. When you write your new chapter of life,
       | begin with the same question you would have if it were a book:
       | "what's the story gonna be, here?"
        
       | known wrote:
        
       | ralusek wrote:
       | Having a bad memory, honestly. I just forget.
        
       | erdaniels wrote:
       | For me it took a lot of time. There's no prescribed amount and no
       | clear fix. The memories fade but will never disappear. Concretely
       | speaking, what helped a lot was journaling and some therapy along
       | the way. Most importantly though was being more vulnerable with
       | my friends and family.
       | 
       | A lot depends on your specific circumstances but for me, I had to
       | forgive myself and at the same time try to really reflect and
       | learn from what happened. I reflect less and less on what
       | happened over time because eventually I moved past it. It took me
       | around two years to move past a chapter lasting about six years.
       | 
       | Regarding the energy of your younger self, that's a natural thing
       | to happen with age. What I recommend for that is maximizing the
       | amount of new experiences you have and dwell less on the
       | nostalgia of who you used to be. Good luck!
        
       | siruva07 wrote:
       | Plant medicine was transformational for me to closing one chapter
       | and opening the next.
       | 
       | Forming new neurological pathways was a significant way of
       | creating new memories which allowed me to move on much easier.
       | 
       | Godspeed on your journey.
       | 
       | https://news.yale.edu/2021/07/05/psychedelic-spurs-growth-ne...
        
       | luxurytent wrote:
       | With time.
       | 
       | Apart from working through it, past it, and moving on with my
       | life, it was important to acknowledge that the scars exist and
       | parts of those scars will take much longer to fade.
       | 
       | I'm entering the third year after a tough time.
        
       | [deleted]
        
       | llaolleh wrote:
       | Writing helps a lot. Just write everything out without a filter.
        
       | KarmicLaw wrote:
       | The past is no longer occurring. Every moment you are aware of
       | has also passed, no longer occurring. move on
        
       | WHA8m wrote:
       | In my observation, the natural response for most people is dial
       | or compensation. No human being can prevent inherent coping
       | mechanisms, so something of the earlier mentioned responses will
       | always be involved, but I'd advice (to try) to aim for a
       | different path: Don't withhold anything. Observe how it makes you
       | feel. Why do you think, does it make you feel in a certain way?
       | Why is something important to you? Relive the good and the bad
       | and think about it a lot. Don't try to replace experiences with
       | others, rather accept what has happened and that it is a part of
       | you know. I don't think anyone can run away from this and most of
       | us suppress previous experiences - but you can't grow from that.
       | Best of luck to you! :)
        
       | peter_retief wrote:
       | You need to use your experience to learn and grow. I had to deal
       | with addictions and my successes are my strengths. Don't be too
       | hard on yourself or others, you will need many people in your
       | life. Be kind to others and yourself and enjoy the moments. Good
       | luck and happy new year!
        
       | awb wrote:
       | A few suggestions for you:
       | 
       | 1) Write, draw or both. Any form of self-expression helps to
       | clear or release stuck memories. You can set a timer or just
       | continue until you feel complete. Sometimes just even writing
       | down words describing your emotions helps to move through it by
       | naming it. The idea is to release these feelings and keep this
       | energy moving instead of holding onto it inside you.
       | 
       | 2) Burn ceremony. Take a symbol from this past experience and
       | burn it. Sit with those feelings, embrace them and try to
       | visualize them leaving as the fire consumes the object. Share any
       | gratitude for the experience or express your anger, sadness, etc.
       | The flame will be a willing listener. Or, like you said ask
       | yourself for permission to move on before you light the fire.
       | 
       | 3) Mantra. When I start focusing on the past I try to ask myself:
       | Is there something I'm wanting in this present moment? If so,
       | then I try to act on it. If not then a mantra can help like "In
       | this present moment I feel ____" or a reminder to your brain can
       | help like: "Thank you, I remember that." The ideas is to
       | acknowledge the thought without judgement but to have a simple
       | process for moving forward and re-focusing on the present. That
       | way when you're enjoying life and you're suddenly reminded of
       | this past experience you have a quick way to snap back into the
       | present instead of letting yourself get sucked back into the
       | past.
       | 
       | This is challenging stuff though and if you find yourself unable
       | to move on, then therapy might be a good option. There are a
       | bunch of online options now and like you said sharing your story
       | with someone else might help. Or, even posting your story
       | anonymously on Reddit might do the trick.
       | 
       | Good luck!
        
       | rcgs wrote:
       | Just sharing my experience - you may be dealing with something
       | slightly different.
       | 
       | I burned out in a job, and went straight into a new one that was
       | less demanding.
       | 
       | I didn't try to do much at all for a while. It was more than a 18
       | months later when I had the itch to do more again.
       | 
       | My takeaway from this has been - be thankful and enjoy the
       | process - don't try to force things.
        
       | RankingMember wrote:
       | > Yet I can't seem to fully rekindle the same energy of my
       | younger self.
       | 
       | IMO, don't try to do this. Move forward and focus on what you're
       | interested in without self-critique (as much as possible).
       | Looking backwards and comparing your present state with previous
       | states will only distract you from making the most of the only
       | time you can actually do anything in (the present).
        
       | [deleted]
        
       | whilestanding wrote:
       | I feel I've been trying to do this for about a decade. It's not
       | easy and our brains tend to focus on negative memories I think as
       | a survival mechanism. Try and create new memories that aren't
       | traumatic. That takes time and effort and good risk assessment. I
       | agree with others here saying change your geography if possible.
       | Change your habits, hobbies, lifestyle, social circle even
       | clothes, the car you drive. Everything you can change do it.
       | Usually your solutions to your problems create more problems but
       | I guess that's just the journey of life and the pursuit of
       | happiness.
       | 
       | One of the easiest pieces of advice I can give is to check out
       | nature/relaxation videos on YouTube. There are these amazing
       | videos 1-10hours long of nothing but peaceful music and beautiful
       | scenery in the background. I put a 55 inch 4k TV in front of my
       | bed and often just lie down and meditate on these wonderful
       | images. I also watch them before I go to bed. In 4k it can be
       | really beautiful if you just calm your mind and appreciate being
       | given a tour of some of the most incredible sights on the planet.
       | I practice gratitude that such a thing is even possible. This is
       | a practice I will keep likely for the rest of my life as it's
       | relatively affordable and doesn't require leaving the house. It
       | also helps create new positive memories and just reminds you that
       | life can be beautiful.
        
       | dazc wrote:
       | You are the sum total of everything that has happened to you.
       | This can seem like a disadvantage when people around you have
       | enjoyed a more perfect existence but, as you get older, you can
       | find strength in the knowledge that you have endured things other
       | people have not. This makes you a better person, whether you feel
       | it or not.
       | 
       | Good luck with the rest of your life.
        
         | wolverine876 wrote:
         | > This can seem like a disadvantage when people around you have
         | enjoyed a more perfect existence ...
         | 
         | Those people living ideal lives don't exist; we all are flawed
         | and wounded. We just don't know about it and many play a game
         | of hiding it, as if we are in a competition to see who can
         | appear more perfect. When I see someone present that way, I
         | assume they are hiding more. Personally, I purposely avoid
         | playing the game. Nobody is fooling anybody anyway, and maybe I
         | can inspire someone by being more open about my problems.
         | 
         | The injuries and scars are human condition. I sometimes imagine
         | they are like the parts chiseled out, as a sculpture would a
         | block of stone. Those (non-existant) perfect people are an
         | untounched block - there is nothing there.
        
         | robbiex88 wrote:
         | This comment really resonated with me. Thank you for sharing.
        
       | kbrisso wrote:
       | The saying time heals is true, it just takes time. My only advice
       | to you is don't let the emotions drive you to do anything
       | negative. It's okay to have emotions just don't let them take you
       | over. Try not to ruminate and get lost in your own head. It can
       | become like OCD. Exercise helped me a lot with ruminating and was
       | a way I could improve myself - take all the negative energy and
       | turn it into something positive. Reading is also good way to shut
       | the mind off. I read a lot of books on how the mind works. If you
       | have a therapist talk to him about what happened and how you
       | feel. Therapy isn't always about looking for a solution to your
       | emotions (root cause) it's a place to talk and get stuff off your
       | chest and to help you find closure. Find someone who can just
       | listen and offer advice when needed or when asked. Life is just
       | random and has ups and downs and the bad things that happen can
       | over shadow all the good. I can say this, if you want to learn
       | from this and move on, you can. You just have to be patient and
       | with time it will get better.
        
       | aantix wrote:
       | If the events keep recurring in your head, and they're intrusive,
       | there's something that isn't fleshed out. That needs to be
       | reconciled.
       | 
       | Start by writing out these dreadful moments, with exacting
       | detail. Look up dates. Talk about tones of voices. Where were you
       | at? What was everyone wearing. Minute detail. What happened. What
       | do you wish would have occurred differently?
       | 
       | You need to reconcile all of the details, so that your brain can
       | appropriately lay them to rest and move forward.
       | 
       | The past authoring program may be of help.
       | 
       | "It would be particularly useful to complete the Past Authoring
       | Program if you have memories that are more than about eighteen
       | months old that still intrude upon your thoughts, or that still
       | evoke emotion such as fear, regret, shame or confusion. If this
       | is happening, it means that your mind has not yet been able to
       | fully process your past experiences, and that the brain areas
       | associated with negative emotion still regard the past events in
       | question as unresolved threats. This is not good, because your
       | brain reacts to unresolved threats with emergency physiological
       | preparation, including the production of stress hormones such as
       | cortisol that can be very toxic when chronically elevated"
       | 
       | https://www.selfauthoring.com/past-authoring
        
         | higeorge13 wrote:
         | I thought i was crazy having done this, i didn't it is a proper
         | advice. I definitely suggest this to everyone with such long
         | term haunting memories and traumas.
        
       | codingdave wrote:
       | For me - Therapy. I know it isn't for everyone, but I was so
       | miserable in one of my jobs that even after I quit, I was just a
       | mess. I didn't need an extended therapy treatment, but I did
       | spend a few sessions with a professional therapist, where we
       | sorted out what was keeping me down, how to respond, and how to
       | avoid getting pulled back into the same patterns.
        
       | l8nite wrote:
       | Anybody deal with severe depression and/or gambling addiction? I
       | need help. I lost about 1/3 of my net worth this year, and I'm
       | spiraling badly.
        
         | wolverine876 wrote:
         | Find a professional to help. Well-meaning people on HN can give
         | you support and compassion, which you need and deserve, but not
         | advice. You wouldn't ask amateurs about fixing a broken bone;
         | this is much more important.
         | 
         | A well-meaning perspective, informed by reading professionals:
         | Damaging habits are driven by healthy, legitimate needs; the
         | habits are just bad coping strategies, usually chosen without
         | realizing what the need was. Become concious of the need, have
         | compassion and love for it, and find healthy ways to cope
         | instead of gambling. The need isn't going anywhere but if you
         | take good care of it, it will be fine. Think of it like a
         | child: If the child is tired and hungry and acting out, you can
         | feed it candy bars, you can yell at it, or you can care for it,
         | give it a healthy meal in a safe place, give it love and peace
         | to sleep. You would be aghast at someone who treated the child
         | with candy bars and abuse; that's what bad coping strategies
         | are.
         | 
         | Best of luck - we are rooting for you!
        
           | l8nite wrote:
           | Thank you very much for your thoughtful reply.
        
         | peppermint_tea wrote:
         | No depression but former gambler here... Gambling is a quick
         | reward (produced by) and for the brain, even when you loose. It
         | is not always about money. This video is the closest thing I
         | found to properly explained what was going on :
         | 
         | http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNWz8rcQtSI&feature=related
         | (non-gamblers may look at this video and not understand at all)
         | 
         | you are probably smart, know the odds are against you, but like
         | any other drug, want/need that quick fix. I am no brain
         | scientist, but I would guess that the drug induced gambling
         | manage to mask your depression temporarily... but the down
         | after a loss makes you go even lower.
         | 
         | I managed to quit gambling when I realized that what I had to
         | loose (in life) was greater than any chance of winning. So
         | think about the things that are already making you a winner,
         | find some other drug inducing activity less nefarious (but also
         | less rewarding) (exercice, coding whatever) and do not hesitate
         | to see a psychologist and perhaps meds if needed.
         | 
         | I would tell you you can message me privately, but did not
         | figured how to do that on HN yet...
        
           | l8nite wrote:
           | Thank you very much for the reply. I don't know how to PM yet
           | on HN either :)
        
         | boopboopbadoop wrote:
         | Many countries have national programs to help. Are you in the
         | US? Check out https://www.ncpgambling.org/
        
         | pjerem wrote:
         | Hey :) You can seek a psychiatrist specialized in addictions
         | issues. They will help you quit the spiral.
         | 
         | Good luck, once helped, you can do it !
        
         | crdrost wrote:
         | Ouch.
         | 
         | Addiction is a form of cyclic preferences... you
         | love/crave/indulge X then you hate/feel-the-repercussions-of X
         | then you love/crave it again, over and over.
         | 
         | Often the X is not quite what you think it is. It's not the
         | alcohol, but the joy of going out and having a wild night and
         | losing control and escaping from the voices that haunt you. Or
         | you might be addicted in a sense to food, eating it because you
         | want to feel _something_ during a dull or pained existence.
         | 
         | Hard drug addicts report that they started using the hard drugs
         | to feel special, but then they had to take them to feel
         | normal... The fallacy is, the body, including your brain, does
         | not have high-water marks--fixed notches in its chemical
         | feedback loops saying "that is okay, but if it goes over this
         | level then that will be too much." No, the body adjusts what it
         | thinks is normal based on what it normally sees. Every moment
         | you spend above the high-water mark, the body adjusts the high-
         | water mark upwards.
         | 
         | Good addiction recovery protocols, even 12-step, do not rely on
         | self-control. You should also not rely on self-control. It's
         | like being tired while driving, the faculty that monitors the
         | problem is being impaired by the problem. "I've got this!" you
         | say as you nod off. You need to build a wall that would
         | actually be harder to climb over. "Don't even buy the sweets--
         | when you crave chocolate you should be faced with the dilemma,
         | I could go all the way to the store, or I could eat a banana
         | right now." It sounds like nothing, going to the store is such
         | a little thing... but that is often enough. Delete accounts.
         | Delete credit card numbers from your phone and browser. Lock
         | cards up in a physical box and put the key on the other side of
         | the house.
         | 
         | But most importantly, understand your pain. Seasons change in
         | life. Every change of seasons requires grieving the outgoing
         | one before you can celebrate the incoming one. Have you
         | properly grieved? Have you given yourself space? Can you talk
         | to yourself like you would to a ten-year-old? No "I'm so awful,
         | I'm so stupid"--you wouldn't say that to a kid who made
         | mistakes!--but just "hey, that sucks, we are gonna fix this
         | together, I have your back." Understand that you are probably
         | gambling to feel things... find happier things to feel. "I love
         | getting out with fresh air... Whenever I feel those urges,
         | maybe I can get out into the fresh air first."
         | 
         | Be especially suspicious of people and places that can pull you
         | back in. One of the biggest things that 12-step programs do is
         | give you friends who are outside of that scene that you were
         | in. People who understand and aren't judgy, but who somehow
         | still you don't want to disappoint. It's not too late to build
         | up community around yourself, or at least to find it. Old
         | friends, neighbors, coworkers... even like some folks playing
         | D&D weekly! Some weekly routine that is just for you and speaks
         | to your deeper connection to community. Be very suspicious if
         | there are others in your life who "can't believe you're
         | spending time with them instead of me!"--if that happens you
         | are in codependency and you need that external community in
         | those boundaries more than you can possibly imagine right now.
         | 
         | Sorry. This is like my second long rant on HN, I probably need
         | to take a break...
        
           | l8nite wrote:
           | Thank you for taking time out of your day to reply to me.
        
         | lulzury wrote:
         | When you're in the hole, the hardest thing to realize is that
         | you're there, so you've already made a huge step forward.
         | 
         | I know it sounds cliche, but have you sought professional help?
         | Therapy and/or a combination of the right medication can go a
         | long way make at least some of the immediate symptoms
         | manageable overnight...
        
           | l8nite wrote:
           | Thanks for the "step forward" comment. I want to get better.
           | I haven't put serious effort into professional help, so
           | that's on my NY resolution list for next week. I have a
           | mental health program available to me from my employer, so I
           | want to try that out and see what it might bring for me.
        
       | rvr_ wrote:
       | I don't believe life has chapters. We live now. The past only
       | exists if rooted on present's memory. I don't think we can choose
       | what to remember, but we sure can decide what to nourish. Good
       | luck, enjoy the journey.
        
       | pryelluw wrote:
       | If possible please make an appointment with therapist.
        
       | gpmcadam wrote:
       | it might sound like overkill, but i'd suggest professional
       | medical help from a trained psychotherapist. they aren't just
       | trained to help you with anxiety/stress/depression but they will
       | be able to give you the tools to address this more than ordinary
       | people in this thread. best of luck!
        
         | temp234 wrote:
         | OP take this suggestion seriously. Therapy is not overkill,
         | they are not gonna make you do anything you don't wanna do, you
         | do not have to feel out of control when you try therapy. You
         | can tell them the specific issues you want to work on.
        
       | flippinburgers wrote:
       | The tragic formula based on my own personal experiences is
       | generally: 3x = path to healing where x is the number of years
       | spent invested in/suffering from a given experience. I realize it
       | sounds weird to put it this way and no doubt other people have a
       | different constant that they could apply to their lives, but for
       | myself, it really is simply that time is required. And you will,
       | for better or worse, never be able to part from your past
       | experiences. The way you are able to emotionally and mentally
       | approach exploring them will, however, change with time.
        
       | spanktheuser wrote:
       | I used to have many, many strong opinions about the effectiveness
       | of various therapeutic techniques. After living a little, I'm
       | left with only two: that most therapeutic approaches are
       | effective for a limited set of situations and individuals. And
       | that most therapists/advice givers fail to acknowledge this
       | notion. Let alone describe the set of circumstances to which
       | various techniques are suited.
       | 
       | I have a friend who found meditation highly helpful. Cognitively
       | they are someone whose mind amplifies the emotional components of
       | their experience, desirable or not. Tools that allow them to
       | manage this have been helpful to their happiness.
       | 
       | On the other hand, my mind occupies the opposite end of the
       | spectrum, requiring exceptional levels stimulation and novelty to
       | experience any emotion. Practices such as meditation have been
       | borderline damaging to my mental state. But piling on more
       | stimulation - new hobby, new obsession, uncomfortable but
       | fascinating experience - these serve to distract and make life
       | vibrant. Rinse repeat forever.
       | 
       | In your circumstance _I_ would not attempt to achieve closure.
       | Instead I'd try accept that what happened to me in the past will
       | taint what's happening now. I'd read the books, journal the ways
       | the celebration of them was damaged. Revisit them a few years
       | later to compare the experience. Attempts to force closure have
       | always failed for me. Wallowing in the emotion as means to
       | explore it even more deeply seems to bring more rapid resolution.
       | 
       | Would this work for someone who has much stronger baseline
       | emotions of grief or melancholy? I have no idea because I'm not
       | that person and my opinions about their experience are worthless.
       | 
       | Ultimately in your shoes I would first focus on experimentation
       | designed to test various hypotheses about your own mental
       | tendencies. Where are you flexible versus resistant to change?
       | Which parts of you are resilient and which vulnerable? Seems to
       | me that this would be the fastest way to learn which tools you
       | need to adopt to achieve your goals.
       | 
       | At least that's how it looks from here. Trapped, as always,
       | inside this particular brain. Good luck.
        
       | padolsey wrote:
       | I had a stroke a couple years ago at the age of 29. It has
       | forever changed me. It is a scar on my brain and body. It is a
       | part of me. I suppose I will never get true closure from the
       | trauma until I __acknowledge__ that it has forever become a part
       | of me. Our lives are composed of the good and bad parts. All are
       | physiologically and neurologically manifested. We cannot
       | completely eliminate them as we cannot reverse entropy. But we
       | can make a peace with them. A bit like having a new scar on your
       | cheek and looking at yourself every day in the mirror until you
       | don't really notice it anymore. Both therapy and time can help.
       | Allow life to take you on new journeys and then these will fill
       | your thoughts, becoming more a part of you than the traumas that
       | you're trying to move on from. I guess that's my take on it, at
       | least. Self-compassion does a wonder as well. Hope you find
       | closure, peace, direction <3
        
       | rmbyrro wrote:
       | Such experiences can put your biology completely out of balance.
       | Check your main vital elements level: iron, vitamin-B complex
       | (defficiency is associated with cognitive stress, fatigue,
       | depression), vitamin D, etc. You may need supplementation.
       | Especially magnesium has helped me a LOT in similar situation.
        
       | stevenfoster wrote:
       | Don't listen to the people who say time is the answer. The time
       | is now and we never know if we're going to get tomorrow.
       | 
       | What I've come to peace with in my life is that suffering gives
       | us an opportunity to intercede for others. It is a gift. If you
       | haven't read Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning I would
       | highly recommend it.
       | 
       | Your last sentence is telling. "It's not real unless I share it
       | with someone else". You don't yet know the life you might change
       | for the better by simply sharing you story. With this past you
       | have the power to connect with others and intercede in their
       | life. This is the greatest gift one can give another.
       | 
       | Be kind with yourself and any others involved. The golden rule is
       | diagnostic. You will love others the way you love yourself.
       | 
       | My best to you and may you be abundantly blessed.
        
         | [deleted]
        
       | sonabinu wrote:
       | What's been helpful for me was to consciously catch myself
       | spiraling into thoughts of my past experience. Making it a habit
       | to replace it with what I'm looking forward to and why I'm better
       | off not being in that toxic situation. It's very draining for a
       | few days but then slowly you notice the difference. And you start
       | feeling more energy and most of all less negative. It's like
       | exercise.
        
       | baskethead wrote:
       | You seem to think that this experience is like a feature flag you
       | can turn on or off.
       | 
       | It's not.
       | 
       | It's an intractable part of who you are now. You can't get rid of
       | it anymore that you can anything else in your life.
       | 
       | Accept that it happened. Forgive whoever was a part of this,
       | including yourself. Move on.
       | 
       | Who you are is who you are from this moment forward. Don't think
       | you can go back to who you were previously. It's impossible.
       | Everything new builds off of today. The past may be tainted but
       | not the future. Read those books. You can't taint them because
       | the taint is in the past and the book is in the future.
        
       | SavantIdiot wrote:
       | I'm in my 50's, this experience will happen several more times in
       | your life. It is good to learn how to recognize it and sit with
       | it, ultimately accepting it and moving on from it.
       | 
       | > Yet I can't seem to fully rekindle the same energy of my
       | younger self.
       | 
       | I went through this in my late 30's early 40's (in my 50's now).
       | You never will recapture that invicible excitement of your early
       | 20's, you only find new forms. If you read literature, this is
       | literally the topic of thousands of poems, epics, sagas, songs,
       | and novels. I think it is wrong that teenagers are forced to read
       | these classics, when the the woes and laments they describe are
       | purely for older people.
       | 
       | I am not a psychotherapist, obviously, but since you are asking
       | for advice:
       | 
       | 1. The mourning will end, but it will come again in some other
       | form; this is unavoidable part of life. Normalizing that is part
       | of the battle.
       | 
       | 2. Everyone in the history of humanity has gone through what you
       | are going through. It is part of the rite of adulthood. Honor the
       | fact that you have finally had the experience.
       | 
       | 3. Create new memories. New memories push old memories back into
       | past. If you don't create new memories, you will ruminate on your
       | last ones. Like Al Bundy always fantasizing about his highschool
       | touchdown late into his 50's (american TV show!).
       | 
       | 4. Meeting new people helps create new memories. Find new groups.
       | In the past 30 years I have done the following:
       | 
       | - Gaming groups (local game store has walk-in night where you can
       | sit and play new games with strangers)
       | 
       | - Pub trivia (I found a team)
       | 
       | - Hiking (local meetup)
       | 
       | - Pottery lessons
       | 
       | - French lessons (taken at my local college in the adult program,
       | LOTS of private parties, dinners & events that were french
       | themed)
       | 
       | - Teaching programming to the local hacker club(s)
       | 
       | - Stained-glass window making lessons
       | 
       | - Carpentry lessons
       | 
       | - Getting into deep-woods backpacking
       | 
       | I took a lot of classes.
       | 
       | But you get the gist. I have SO many memories that my brain is a
       | blur after decades of this and I need pictures to remind myself
       | of all of the comedy/tragedy I've been through.
       | 
       | Good luck!
        
       | lighthammer wrote:
       | I still think about mistakes from 25 years ago. The only
       | difference is I accept it finally and thinking about the past
       | does not evoke much emotion anymore. All due to time.
       | 
       | To find closure, find something new that will occupy the energy
       | from thinking about the past. Happy for you that you have closure
       | and my 2022 bring much peace and blessings to you and your
       | family.
        
       | kchameleon1234 wrote:
       | EMDR therapy works wonders for CPTSD. Cognitive Behavioral
       | Therapy can be really good at uncovering the underlying cause of
       | the feelings you're experiencing. EMDR is a nice supplement to
       | disengage from or (more often) desensitize yourself from the
       | causes of those feelings.
       | 
       | My own experience comes from dealing with sexual assault and long
       | term abandonment and attachment issues, but I've found the
       | experiences I gained through those two therapy modalities useful
       | for dealing with minor crises or life-stage transitions as well.
       | 
       | Personally, psychedelic mushrooms also play a role in my own
       | recovery and ongoing therapy, but they're not for everyone.
       | 
       | Best of luck to you. I hope you find peace and comfort in the
       | near future. We all deserve to leave the past behind, to learn
       | from it, and to look directly into the future when we are ready.
        
         | diob wrote:
         | I've had so so results with EMDR for trauma (lots of childhood
         | shit). I'm hoping psychedelics become legal for therapy, I've
         | heard / read great things.
        
       | rg111 wrote:
       | Your past never leaves you. You just _learn_ to live with it.
       | 
       | You change somehow, so that changed version can live with
       | whatever it was.
       | 
       | After a painful chapter in my life, I fully changed my social
       | circle. I kept in touch with a very few people who are "good"
       | people, and who are emotionally mature.
       | 
       | I avoided reunions, get-togethers, picnics, etc. Doing this, I
       | also punished those who were in the middle- not the close ones or
       | the ones who aided the bad things in my life.
       | 
       | Multiple people have talked about doing something. I would
       | recommend that very highly.
       | 
       |  _" A deep life is a good life."_
       | 
       | Whatever you do, or whatever you are interested to do, dive into
       | that. Spend serious time for getting good at it. Practice
       | deliberately. Level up. Doing this will benefit you in multiple
       | unforseen ways. Not just with your immediate problem.
       | 
       | For me, it was Mathematical Physics, poetry and literature in
       | general, reading History very carefully. It made my life good.
       | 
       | Meet new people. At your own pace. Get to know them. Form new
       | connections.
       | 
       | Changing geographical scenario is helpful. I happened to move
       | into a megacity at that time- the people of where matched well
       | with my personality.
       | 
       | Having someone to share your trauma who knows you closely and who
       | has seen it all unfold is really valuable.
       | 
       | Finally, give it time. Be patient. Don't judge yourself. Be open.
       | 
       | What you shouldn't do-
       | 
       | 1. Don't doomscroll social media.
       | 
       | 2. Don't let alcohol consumption go over a certain threshold.
       | 
       | You could ask me questions. I will monitor my comment and answer
       | if you want.
        
         | prox wrote:
         | Well said. A book on poetry I highly recommend is The Rag and
         | Bone Shop of the Heart. A beautiful anthology of many poets and
         | poems geared towards men in all stages of life. Everyone should
         | learn one poem by heart is my take away from the book.
        
           | rg111 wrote:
           | Wow, thanks for your recommendation. Only English poetry I
           | read are Tennyson and Keats. And some Whitman.
           | 
           | I also read poetry in Bengali, Sanskrit (Kalidasa only), and
           | Urdu.
           | 
           | I am pretty much limited to the classics except for Bengali.
           | 
           | I need to broaden my horizon in terms of new poetry.
           | 
           | It is an exploitation vs exploration problem for me. And as I
           | have very little time for poetry, I definitely tend to
           | exploit more.
           | 
           | I will definitely check out your recommendation.
        
         | jarlab wrote:
         | I kind of went through the same stuff as you, really appreciate
         | your answer.
        
       | [deleted]
        
       | asasdfasdfasdv wrote:
       | I am currently going through a drawn out stressful chapter of my
       | life, seems like it keeps getting dragged on and on.
       | 
       | Not sure which of these are a good idea but I did all of these,
       | and though the stressful chapter is not over yet, I think I am in
       | a better place than when it all started.
       | 
       | - I felt like moving on is not a thing you do, but more like what
       | happens when other (hopefully better) things fill up your life
       | and the past haunts you less and less.
       | 
       | - Get busy, I joined a book club, hiking club, local sports
       | league, many local meetups, used messaging apps to create groups
       | and stay in touch constantly with old friends. Talk to your close
       | friends candidly about how you feel. Meet more people, create
       | more chances for things to happen - new friends, new experiences
       | etc.
       | 
       | - I didn't want to fall into the trap of alcohol or smoking
       | excessively, I used to indulge in both before but I consciously
       | reduced both and started swimming and setup goals to improve my
       | swimming etc. (very happy I did this)
       | 
       | - Pick up fun personal/hobby projects to keep you buys, as much
       | as I say you should do this, I personally didn't do much of it
       | until I started feeling better a lot later.
       | 
       | - Many have mentioned it here, but give it time, it will not
       | happen overnight.
       | 
       | - Embrace change, I think I even changed the orientation of all
       | furniture in the house too, eventually changed the house as well
       | (easier for me since I was renting)
       | 
       | - Find people/friends who have gone through similar stuff, its
       | always good to talk to them. I made it a point to hang out a bit
       | with such people.
       | 
       | I remember it was very stressful initially, but eventually it
       | gets better. I am in a much better place than I was then, though
       | my ordeal is still getting drawn out and doesn't seem to end,
       | hopefully soon. As someone else said it here, all these
       | experiences now make you who you really are.
        
       | JohnBooty wrote:
       | It may sound strange but I almost feel I have to ask          for
       | permission to move on.
       | 
       | Easier said than done, but I think part of it is giving yourself
       | permission?
       | 
       | When my mom died, I had some lingering... negative feelings. I
       | was angry about some medical choices she made, and of course I
       | blamed myself for not helping more.
       | 
       | Eventually I gave myself permission to...
       | 
       | 1. Feel multiple things at once. I am allowed to have some
       | negative feelings AND simultaneously enjoy all of the wonderful
       | and positive memories of her.
       | 
       | 2. Continue to feel the negative things. I did not try to stomp
       | out the negative things. They are valid! I have valid reasons to
       | feel some amount of anger!
       | 
       | Over time the positive voices in my head greatly outnumbered the
       | negative ones. I didn't have to chase down the negative ones and
       | eliminate them.
        
       | pjio wrote:
       | If you can afford it and the corona restrictions allow it, travel
       | for some time with little luggage and on a low budget.
        
       | marstall wrote:
       | I recently read an interesting thing about memory. Which is that
       | remembering something - that is, bringing it to mind and playing
       | it out - refreshes the memory, makes it new again.
       | 
       | And if you don't do that, you will forget.
       | 
       | So now when I have a bad memory, I try focusing on the feelings
       | it creates in my body, and not naming them, or blaming anyone.
       | 
       | As painful as that can be in the moment, my attention moves on
       | pretty quickly - and I've avoided perseverating at least that one
       | time.
        
       | higeorge13 wrote:
       | I had some devastating experiences on my early 20s losing people
       | i loved and cared so much. The trauma was so intense that i don't
       | remember almost anything from these terrible years. Eventually i
       | moved on, but the trauma was never healed. I had another recent
       | devastating experience that made everything come out again x10000
       | times worse. The goal is not just to move on, just for the sake
       | of it. The goal is to accept what happened, stop blaming yourself
       | and then move on.
       | 
       | My advice is to talk it with someone, and if you still struggle,
       | seek for professional help. Better now than in 10 years.
       | 
       | Write down everything that happened and you keep thinking. Be
       | specific, all your thoughts, feelings, facts, wishes, anything.
       | 
       | In addition, change your life as much as you wish and you can,
       | change jobs, house, car, meet new friends, try new hobbies.
       | 
       | Happy new year and take care.
        
       | vanusa wrote:
       | All you can do is throw yourself headlong into new experiences.
       | 
       | Plus, there's a hack: changing your geographic frame of reference
       | _really_ helps. If you can afford it and are not too attached to
       | where you 're living -- and especially if you kind of hate where
       | you're living -- just pick up and move. Ideally to a different
       | climate, perhaps with a different accent or a different language
       | altogether.
       | 
       | At least for a while -- 6 months to a year.
       | 
       | You see your brain is hardwired to 'index' new memories based on
       | sensory cues -- light, colors, smells, sounds... and especially
       | new faces. When these stimuli change, and especially when they
       | all change at once -- it's like our brain opens up a whole new
       | space to operate, and to start organizing all of these new
       | memories and experiences in.
       | 
       | Like turning the page and starting a whole new chapter, as it
       | were.
        
         | siva7 wrote:
         | Changing the geographic frame is the single most effective way
         | to deal with past experiences. I've done it in the past from
         | traumatic experiences and it was always a huge step forward for
         | my mental health!
        
         | knuthsat wrote:
         | That's exactly what my wife did. College was extremely
         | stressful and filled with suffering for her. After it ended,
         | she never felt like it really ended.
         | 
         | But after we moved to a different country she is a completely
         | new person.
        
         | djbelieny wrote:
         | Indeed. Being through a few traumatic experiences in the first
         | months of 2020, including the sudden death of my dad. I can
         | attest that while it has been hard to let go of some memories
         | and feelings, changing the geographic frame is an absolute hack
         | that works. Look for something completely different, if you
         | live in the city move to the country, if you live in the
         | mountains move to the beach. Allow yourself the new
         | experiences, use your senses to explore the new. In my case,
         | the following also helped:
         | 
         | 1) allowed myself to invest and finish a project that had
         | special meaning to me since before the trauma;
         | 
         | 2) Got a new dog, learned how to train her as a service dog,
         | and put in the work to get that completed. BONUS: I now have a
         | trained service dog that I love, can take everywhere, and is
         | truly man's best friend.
         | 
         | 3) Started small projects which involved my loved ones, which
         | helped me bond and create new memories with each one
         | individually.
         | 
         | Hope this helps. The most important thing is to keep on keeping
         | on. Never give up.
        
           | zain wrote:
           | How did you learn how to train your dog?
        
             | djbelieny wrote:
             | TLDR; A Lot of internet coupled with a lot of trial and
             | error - fun times.
             | 
             | But seriously, I first started researching online how
             | people trained their dogs for obedience and to do simple
             | tasks. Read a couple of books on the subject, signed up for
             | an online class (COVID lockdowns and all), watched tons of
             | Youtube videos, which were more informative and way more
             | practical than the classes and books and practiced a lot
             | with my Dog. She picked up really fast and within a couple
             | of months I had her doing some serious obedience tasks. I
             | would say she and I learned together ;) After that, I amped
             | up the work consistency and focused on the specific task
             | she needed to do in my case to become a service dog. Now
             | with that said I want to plug something here, there's a
             | group called STSK9 that has an outstanding online dog
             | training university. I found them way down in my path and I
             | still may register since I love what they are doing to help
             | teach people how to train dogs and from what see on their
             | site + social media interactions their students and dogs
             | get the best in the biz. Link to their site
             | https://www.stsk9.com/
        
         | gringoDan wrote:
         | Actually building something helps a ton: either a project at
         | work, or through hobbies like woodworking, writing, art,
         | comedy, etc.
         | 
         | And the geographic hack is great advice. I moved to a new city
         | following a breakup a few years back and it did wonders for my
         | mental health.
         | 
         | I also recommend journaling: Getting thoughts out of your head
         | and onto a page can provide a sense of closure.
        
         | ethbr0 wrote:
         | Another variant: if you can afford to and work permits,
         | temporarily relocate somewhere for awhile. Rent a minimal-cost
         | place for a month+.
         | 
         | As one option, look into professional house-sitting (common in
         | US, not sure elsewhere). Essentially, people with high end
         | homes, who are going to be away for a period, who want someone
         | they can trust not to wreck the place to just _be_ there.
         | 
         | But essentially, just _live_ somewhere else for a minute. For
         | me it takes about 5 days to start living instead of visiting.
         | 
         | After my mother's cancer diagnosis, when treatment was in
         | progress but surgery still scheduled some time away, and I had
         | a job I hated, with co-workers whose morals I didn't share... I
         | spent a few weeks in Japan and Thailand. (Mostly paid by reward
         | points, long saved)
         | 
         | It was amazing how refreshing my view on my own life was, from
         | a different vantage point.
         | 
         | When I got back, I quit the job, took some time off with the
         | aid of savings, and spent time with my mom through her
         | treatment. I'm not sure I would have realized that was the
         | right path without the distance. (And it finally resulted in
         | one of the best jobs of my career)
        
           | robot1 wrote:
           | do you have any resources for how to get into professional
           | house-sitting? sounds like it would expand horizons in a very
           | accessible way!
        
             | ethbr0 wrote:
             | I didn't even know it was a thing, until my father did it
             | when moving for work, while looking for a permanent house
             | to purchase.
             | 
             | Can't offer any details, but this [0] seems to have a range
             | of links and the basics. I gather it's something like
             | Airbnb, but in reverse (homeowners looking for quality
             | person). I imagine it's mostly person and reputation based
             | (e.g. I present as a responsible professional + here are
             | some expensive houses I have been entrusted successfully
             | with).
             | 
             | If you know any real estate agents, you can also ask them
             | where they find temporary placements (i.e. home currently
             | on the market, which are usually paid) as a "resume"
             | starter. But I imagine you'd probably be looking for non-
             | real-estate listings long term. As they usually those
             | require you to be available on short notice to vacate for
             | people to walk through.
             | 
             | And the bigger points are (1) must be flexible in "finding
             | somewhere else" or "vacating within a few months" & (2) be
             | able to live in a place with a light touch (no parties,
             | destructive living, pets, etc.).
             | 
             | [0] https://estatesitting.com/long-term-house-sitter/
        
           | throwaway24124 wrote:
           | Thanks for the house-sitting recommendation, great idea.
           | What's your job now?
        
             | ethbr0 wrote:
             | Unfortunately, I've since moved on. #FirstWorldProblems,
             | but in retrospect, +50% salary isn't automatically enough
             | to make up for good vs bad corporate culture and quality of
             | colleagues.
        
         | wnolens wrote:
         | > changing your geographic frame of reference really helps.
         | 
         | Thanks for saying this. I was stuck and faced my problems head-
         | on for years in therapy (and every day life). More than one
         | therapist I saw for an extended period of time really drove
         | home the point that the "geographical cure" doesn't work
         | because you just bring your problems with you.
         | 
         | But that's an incredibly myopic view. After finally breaking up
         | with those therapists/asshats, I went through a period of being
         | nomadic and then settled elsewhere. Some of my problems went
         | away immediately, some came with me, others appeared. But I was
         | more able to separate myself from my context, process difficult
         | emotions with distance from the triggers, receive the gifts of
         | a new place and its culture, see how different people
         | live/struggle elsewhere.
         | 
         | I don't think there's any other way I could have turned my
         | trajectory around.
        
           | vanusa wrote:
           | It's true that you'll always have your problems with you.
           | It's also true that "wherever you go, there you are."
           | 
           | But for every set of problems S1 ... there's a secondary set
           | S2 that consists basically of "thinking _too damn much_ about
           | S1 " along with a heaping portion of "why me, why me, why
           | me?". The growth of which starts to take on a life of its
           | own, and to greatly leverage the suffering that S1 would
           | otherwise cause on its own.
           | 
           | So part of the basic healing mechanism of the change-of-
           | coordinates approach is that, while it doesn't reduce the
           | size of S1 directly ... it does help reduce the run-away
           | swelling of S2 very substantially. Which allows slow-acting
           | but powerful natural healing factors (the passage of time, as
           | a sibling commenter point out) to focus much better on S1.
           | 
           | Until one day, you're going about your business ... and you
           | realize you haven't thought about S1 in a while. Not just for
           | a couple of hours, but for a like a full day or more. That's
           | when you start to realize that it's at least _possible_ to
           | move on.
        
       | inter_netuser wrote:
       | Share it with your closest friends, family.
       | 
       | Real friends and family that loves you > "professionals"
        
         | meristohm wrote:
         | A disinterested third party (save for the financial transaction
         | and hopefully a sense of helping), whose training prepares them
         | to handle all the trauma they hear about, can be just the thing
         | to crawl out of a pit. Not everyone has friends or family who
         | can or want to handle baggage (ideally they would be so
         | healthy, and it's okay if they aren't). It may take time to
         | find a professional counselor who fits, and a reticent person
         | might need a catalyst (books and The Blindboy Podcast in my
         | case) to find a counselor to be vulnerable with.
        
       | throwDec21 wrote:
       | I see two different problems - closure of the recent experiences
       | and whether you should get back to "same energy of my younger
       | self". You're likely older and wiser now, such people do
       | different things to when they were younger, embrace it.
        
       | breckenedge wrote:
       | I used to jump into new and expensive hobbies to turn a page.
       | Didn't really fix anything. Regular therapy has helped me a ton,
       | and it's been cheaper too.
        
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