[HN Gopher] I did a Mixergy interview so bad they didn't even re...
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       I did a Mixergy interview so bad they didn't even release it
        
       Author : robfitz
       Score  : 80 points
       Date   : 2021-12-22 13:18 UTC (9 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (www.robfitz.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (www.robfitz.com)
        
       | andybak wrote:
       | Rob - if you're listening, I enjoyed reading this but I don't
       | know who you are and nothing on your website neatly summarizes
       | that.
       | 
       | Google finds several people with similar names. I presume you're
       | a tech entrepreuner so I guess this is you:
       | https://www.crunchbase.com/person/rob-fitzpatrick
       | 
       | Which leads me to wonder what Dexio is but the Crunchbase link
       | leads to an domain squatter and according to Google it's a
       | Pokemon. :-)
       | 
       | EDIT - your twitter bio was more useful. I missed that initially.
       | Still have no idea what Dexio is.
        
         | hammock wrote:
         | He's the Mom Test guy. Not sure why he makes it so hard to find
         | that info. Could use a marketing intern (reply here if you want
         | one)
        
           | philovivero wrote:
           | I could use a marketing intern.
        
           | dylan604 wrote:
           | If you're not cool enough to find it, you're not cool enough
           | to read it. My bio page can only be found on mobile. Desktop
           | users are too lame. You have to swipe up up down down left
           | right on the correct page in order to find it /s
        
           | robfitz wrote:
           | The mundane answer is that there's some stuff that I worry
           | about optimizing and other stuff that I don't, and this
           | little personal site is the latter ;).
           | 
           | To a lesser extent, I also didn't exactly expect this to hit
           | frontpage, so I'd sort of assumed that the only people who
           | would see it were people who already knew me.
           | 
           | I'm still not sure about the answer to that, but this has at
           | least prompted me to give it a proper think and decide
           | whether I want to try to appeal to "the world" or just stay
           | focused on my own little orbit. No idea where I'll end up,
           | but it's an interesting question, and I appreciate you giving
           | me the nudge to take it seriously.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | Heya, thanks, it's a new site setup, so it's super helpful to
         | hear about your experience with it -- I'll get that clarified.
         | (I had nestled an about/bio link in the deep bottom-left
         | sidenav, but it's admittedly very easy to overlook.) In the
         | meantime, if you're still curious, the full bio thing is at:
         | http://stuff.robfitz.com/about/
        
           | andybak wrote:
           | > There's a link in the deep bottom-left sidenav
           | 
           | How did I miss that?
           | 
           | Oh well. I suppose I'm a good test subject in that regard.
        
             | robfitz wrote:
             | The user is always right ;). I'll keep working on it.
             | Thanks again.
        
       | camillomiller wrote:
       | I googled Mixergy and found out about a pretty interesting smart
       | hot water tank.
       | 
       | Edit: being downvoted for a silly joke, I get it, but it's true.
       | That Mixergy is placed way better than the startuppers' little
       | bubble interview website.
        
       | froggertoaster wrote:
       | I would love for the author to delve more into what made the
       | interview so bad, with specific examples.
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | It was the difference between a wikipedia article vs. a
         | biography (i.e., a collection of facts vs. those same facts,
         | but arranged around a narrative).
         | 
         | A specific example came up while trying to explain my first
         | company's pivots through three products (trying to figure out a
         | social/UGC ad stack before Facebook did). If you looked at the
         | business model, our value prop, customer segment, etc. all of
         | that stayed the same. Which was the unifying thread, and which
         | I can now articulate at least semi-coherently.
         | 
         | But when I was describing it to Andrew, it came out as three
         | completely unrelated products, and that we were just wildly
         | changing plans without any coherent vision or direction. I
         | remember that moment due to his look of profound confusion,
         | where he was really trying to figure out how these three things
         | I had just described were related.
        
       | 0898 wrote:
       | By the sounds of it, this happened before Andrew started doing
       | "pre-interviews". Now he has one of his team members speak to the
       | person to suss out their story. Andrew just just wrote a book
       | about his interview process - it's called Stop Asking Questions,
       | and I thoroughly recommend it. He shows you how to get
       | interesting material from people, rather than platitudes like:
       | "business is a marathon, not a sprint".
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | Ya, we went in cold after just a quick email exchange, so
         | you're spot on there.
         | 
         | Still, I remember being quite struck by how authentically he
         | was working to get to the heart of it and tease out some value
         | from the mess I was making. It really felt like he was on my
         | side, working with me, despite how difficult I was making it.
         | 
         | I grabbed a copy of his book a couple days back (which is maybe
         | what reminded me of this little anecdote) but haven't gotten
         | into it yet since the pile of interesting reading is just a bit
         | too deep. Very much looking forward to it though, cuz nobody
         | knows it better (except maybe Oprah, I guess?)
        
         | AndrewWarner wrote:
         | That was probably my way of doing the pre-interview back then.
         | Talking to the guest before we officially start.
        
       | Zachsa999 wrote:
       | Why does mixergy have a photo of Gary Vaynerchuk on the home
       | page.
        
       | bellyfullofbac wrote:
       | Critique about the writing: BuzzFeed/Twitter-style 1 sentence per
       | paragraph made me stop reading after the 2nd paragraph.
        
       | zhan_eg wrote:
       | @robfitz, not related to the content as I couldn't get to that on
       | Firefox 95
       | 
       | Opening the website returns:
       | 
       | NS_ERROR_NET_INADEQUATE_SECURITY
       | 
       | By a cursory glance, it looks like some misconfiguration
       | (supporting HTTP/2, but no presenting TLS1.2 at the same time ..
       | even that it looks available).
       | 
       | SSL Labs results may help you diagnose [1]
       | 
       | [1]
       | https://www.ssllabs.com/ssltest/analyze.html?d=www.robfitz.c...
        
         | neogodless wrote:
         | For what it's worth, I can open the web site fine on Firefox
         | 95.0.2 / Windows 10, uBlock Origin, multi-account containers.
        
       | penetrarthur wrote:
       | I was listening to a lot of Mixergy some 10 years ago and I
       | really enjoyed it but for some reason stopped. I was looking for
       | something to listen to couple weeks ago and after spending some
       | 20 minutes to remember the name "Mixery" I listened to couple of
       | his latest podcasts. It feels so different now. I think the
       | general attitude of Andrew towards his guests has changed a lot.
       | He is so pushy now and it feels like the episodes are more about
       | him, rather than the story of the guest.
        
         | hammock wrote:
         | Same. Mixergy 10 years ago was able to hustle a lot of
         | interviews with really famous/interesting people, that helped
         | Mixergy get traction and grow, despite the interviews
         | themselves being pretty bland.
         | 
         | I'm sure with experience they have gotten better. Although to
         | your point maybe Andrew is "bigger" than his guests now,
         | changing the dynamic.
        
         | marban wrote:
         | Agreed. I'd say that happens to most podcasts or YT channels
         | once professionalism, agendas and routine over excitement kicks
         | in.
        
       | d--b wrote:
       | And asking for a friend - how did you fix those guts of yours?
        
         | xxs wrote:
         | I mean - alcohol is like violence... and xml. If it doesn't
         | solve your problem you aint using enough.
        
           | tailspin2019 wrote:
           | Funny. Working with XML often drives me to violence and
           | alcohol.
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | I tried a bit of everything, and I did it all at the same time,
         | so it's hard to pin down causation. The only thing that _had
         | to_ happen was to shift my diet away from being primarily
         | composed of alcohol, coffee, and tabasco. Apart from that, a
         | high-end probiotic thing may well have helped, and a good chiro
         | /nutritionist acted as a sort of accountability coach to keep
         | me going.
         | 
         | Also, getting serious about reining in the drinking acted as an
         | anchor habit that led to a bunch of other positive lifestyle
         | changes. (I still probably drink far more than almost anyone
         | would consider acceptable, but it's down to a level where my
         | body appears able to keep up. So still a work in progress, I
         | guess, but at least my energy is back up.)
        
       | bruceb wrote:
       | Slight side note, I am surprised how Mixergy/Andrew has almost
       | zero social media presence. There are no social icons on their
       | site and there is no engagement with fans on Twitter (or anywhere
       | else?).
       | 
       | I wonder why this is.
        
         | 6gvONxR4sf7o wrote:
         | I'm surprised that not being on social media is a surprising
         | thing to people.
        
           | bruceb wrote:
           | for a regular person sure, but for a show generally you want
           | grow your audience and engage a bit with existing listeners.
        
       | mberning wrote:
       | My own narrative and the accuracy or correctness of it was
       | something that I thought about frequently. Then I had a child. It
       | really helped put my experiences and my actions into context. I
       | now find myself thinking more about the narrative of my parents,
       | and previous generations in general. I feel like I give myself
       | and my parents a lot more grace than I used to.
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | An important moment and transformation, well-described. Thanks
         | for sharing it :)
        
       | Chris2048 wrote:
       | Aw, fuck. Now I want a boat.
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | And I want you to get one ;)
         | 
         | Sailing had always been on my "someday bucket list," but I kept
         | putting it off since I could never make the time to take the
         | week or two off to do the course.
         | 
         | But once I started learning, it was so much more deeply
         | satisfying than anything else in my life, that it immediately
         | became a top focus. Before I'd even finished my captain's
         | license, I had already hit "buy it now" on an ebay listing
         | (admittedly reckless and not recommended, but I couldn't wait).
         | 
         | That being said, boats are floating money pits (the rule of
         | thumb is that you spend half the boat's price again, every
         | year, in maintenance and mooring) and take a ton of upkeep, so
         | I think it's only viable if it's a major piece of your life and
         | you're willing to devote considerable time o it. Otherwise, it
         | just sits there, losing money while accumulating chores.
         | 
         | I sold mine during the first lockdown, but I'll absolutely get
         | another someday, once I'm ready to wrap my life around it
         | again.
        
           | luckyscs wrote:
           | I think the key is to get a modest sail boat like a sunfish
           | similar size. The cost are way more manageable.
        
             | robfitz wrote:
             | Yeah, I looked at trailer sailers (although I wanted a
             | cabin), but it wasn't really viable for the types of travel
             | I wanted to do. Now that my life and location are slightly
             | more predictable, a 7m with a small cabin that could go on
             | a trailer would be ideal. (Although I'm sure I won't end up
             | making that sensible choice.)
        
           | datavirtue wrote:
           | I literally bought a book about buying boats. I was really
           | hyped about buying a boat before I read it. Still no boat
           | years later.
        
         | notahacker wrote:
         | I'm reading this on board my boat, getting nice warm feelings
         | of empathy about single handing long flights of locks, and then
         | Rob has to go and spoil the happy thoughts by talking about
         | diesel spills and sinking :D
        
         | Peretus wrote:
         | As a software developer and team lead who's worked from and
         | lived on a sailboat for the last two years, I'd agree with
         | others here and encourage you to give it a shot. My wife and I
         | both work remotely as software developers and we've been able
         | to put thousands of miles under the keel, traveling from Mobile
         | Alabama, to as far north as the Chesapeake Bay with multiple
         | stops in the Florida Keys and the Bahamas, all while keeping
         | our full-time software engineering jobs. It's been a really
         | great experience and I highly-recommend it to anyone with a
         | remote role.
        
           | chegra wrote:
           | Ever been to Antigua and Barbuda?
        
             | Peretus wrote:
             | We haven't, but it's on the list! We've mostly stuck to the
             | US coast and Western Caribbean, visiting the Keys, the
             | Bahamas, a bit up North, and the stuff in between.
             | Currently anchored in Biscayne bay (Coconut Grove), but
             | will probably be headed down to the keys in a month or so.
        
           | ahominid wrote:
           | I'd love to hear about the logistics of how you do this
           | because it's something I've considered trying, at least for a
           | period of time. I keep running into the idea that without
           | consistent, reliable Internet, not to mention the other
           | niceties of productivity like a workspace and monitors, it
           | simply wouldn't work for more than a few weeks.
        
             | throw_away wrote:
             | Not OP, but this couple has written a bit about working on
             | tech projects while living on a sailboat:
             | https://100r.co/site/working_offgrid_efficiently.html
        
         | dugmartin wrote:
         | Be forewarned. My favorite quote about boats: "they are holes
         | in the water that you throw money in".
        
       | philip1209 wrote:
       | Interesting - is this a personal site built on https://circle.so?
        
         | zapt02 wrote:
         | Yes, you can see a link to Circle if you follow the privacy
         | policy.
        
       | Stevvo wrote:
       | As a sailboat owner I really want to hear the story of how you
       | sank the boat...
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | It's far less dramatic than you'd hope.
         | 
         | I left it moored up at a port along the canal for winter (when
         | the canal gets too shallow to traverse), the folks who were
         | supposed to be keeping an eye on it didn't, uncharacteristic
         | winter storms were blowing rain and muck all over the place,
         | the cockpit drains got clogged, the cockpit filled with water,
         | and things went downhill from there ;)
         | 
         | It was sitting quite happily on the shallow riverbed when I
         | returned, but the inside was a swamp, and I had to tear out and
         | trash the whole interior. At least it was fresh water, so the
         | engine (mostly) survived.
        
       | PragmaticPulp wrote:
       | I sometimes struggle to condense my thoughts while speaking,
       | which can make for some uninteresting long-winded stories if I'm
       | not careful.
       | 
       | But it does get better with deliberate practice. Knowing the
       | issue is half the battle.
       | 
       | To be candid, even this blog post was on the wordy side. I
       | understand where the author was trying to go with the piece by
       | the end, but it might have been more engaging if reduced to half
       | the length or less. Being concise is important for making
       | specific points.
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | This is semi off-topic, but I normally write books, which I
         | work pretty hard to edit down into the shortest versions of
         | themselves.
         | 
         | As a weird side-effect of that, I noticed myself starting to
         | hold _all_ of my writing to that same standard, which was
         | stopping me from putting out anything more off-the-cuff.
         | 
         | So part of my motivation with this site (which is only about a
         | week old) was to frame it in a way, at least for myself, where
         | I felt comfortable sharing the stuff-in-progress without
         | worrying too much that it wasn't a finished book.
         | 
         | Which I guess is a long way to say that the rambliness is an
         | intentional decision, since otherwise it wouldn't be doing the
         | job (for me) that it was designed for. I already spend 20+
         | hours a week doing fairly utilitarian writing for my books, so
         | this little site needs to be something different if I hope to
         | stick with it. And in an ideal world, maybe a few other people
         | will happen to enjoy some bits and pieces along the way :)
        
         | cfcosta wrote:
         | More often than I admit, I think about this quote by Mark
         | Twain: "I apologize for such a long letter - I didn't have time
         | to write a short one." You have to think about who's going to
         | hear or listen to you, it's not just about being precise and
         | descriptive.
        
           | datameta wrote:
           | "Make things as simple as possible, but no simpler." -
           | Einstein
           | 
           | "Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." - Da Vinci
           | 
           | I had been exploring this idea in my codegolfing. For
           | example: https://www.dwitter.net/d/15323
        
             | loco5niner wrote:
             | lol, codegolfing is the opposite of simplicity.
             | 
             | Although to be fair, the code you linked to is much more
             | readable than I had anticipated.
        
       | AndrewWarner wrote:
       | I take full responsibility for not being able to tell the story
       | well back then.
       | 
       | It's my responsibility more than it is Rob's.
       | 
       | It was January 2012. I was still learning how to coach the story
       | out of my interviewees. I've done a lot of personal work over the
       | last decade to get better and better at that.
       | 
       | I appreciate that Rob trusted me with such a vulnerable story
       | back then. Rob, if you're reading this thank you.
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | Aw, you're a star, Andrew. I really appreciate (and admire) the
         | sentiment and thoughtfulness. (Although I still think that I
         | dropped a bit of an unsalvageable mess on your lap!)
         | 
         | As a side note since you're here, I'm super psyched that you've
         | taken the time to share what you've learned in your new book --
         | it's the next one up on my list for serious study, and I
         | couldn't be more excited about it. Based on the reviews so far,
         | it looks like you've written something really special and that
         | I'm in for a real treat. Can't wait :)
        
       | mmahut wrote:
       | Curious, what boat model is that?
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | Westerley Centaur 1972 bilge keel, 7.9 meters, with interior
         | layout A: https://sailboatdata.com/sailboat/centaur-26-westerly
         | 
         | Was the most popular British-made small boat of all time, and
         | some of them have successfully circumnavigated.
         | 
         | Sturdy thing with only 0.9m draft, able to ride into shallow
         | waters and sit happily on its keels when the tide goes out, and
         | surprisingly spacious for its length. Good boat.
        
           | jacquesm wrote:
           | Those are pretty popular on Waddenzee, because of their
           | ability to just set down without falling over when the tides
           | go out.
        
             | robfitz wrote:
             | Exactly. Really opens up some beautiful coastal areas to
             | explore where the tides are big.
             | 
             | It's also quite nice to know that if you happen to run into
             | an unmarked sandbank, you'll only have to sit there, and
             | not sit there sideways ;)
        
       | ignoramous wrote:
       | Well, that was quite something.
       | 
       | > _The funny thing here is that I 'm 100% aware that our stories
       | are wrong. Our own stories, doubly so. We back-fit narratives.
       | Our minds rewrite what we remember ourselves thinking at the
       | time._
       | 
       | What are some ways to break out of this mode, and look back upon
       | the timeline for what it was? robfitz wrote 'The Mom Test', so
       | they must know!?
       | 
       | > _So our stories are wrong. But they still matter._
       | 
       | I guess cognitive dissonance is how most of us are keeping our
       | world-view intact. Especially when you realise that nothing
       | really matters in the grand scheme of things [1].
       | 
       | [1] https://www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/4iC9Qi3y9q8
        
         | Benjammer wrote:
         | >What are some ways to break out of this mode
         | 
         | I would guess the best answer here is to write down everything.
         | Keep a journal. Write down events as soon after they happen as
         | possible, write down your thoughts about the event, write down
         | your emotions and connect them to the events that generate
         | them.
         | 
         | I think a somewhat decent mental model here is to think of our
         | brains as write-only memory. Every time you remember something,
         | your brain rewrites the memory. You, on some level, are
         | experiencing the event/thought/feeling again. When you think
         | about what you felt during a past event, you are mostly feeling
         | your current reaction to the memory, and not as much tapping
         | into past feelings as you might think.
         | 
         | One broad example of this is what people call "type 2 fun."
         | This describes events that may not produce positive emotions in
         | the moment, usually some kind of hard physical
         | tasks/achievements. But, looking back, these events produce
         | positive emotions when remembering the event and the
         | accomplishment.
        
           | datavirtue wrote:
           | Ah yes, the suffering of Krav Maga...and the joy of it being
           | done and remembered.
        
           | bckr wrote:
           | > type 2 fun
           | 
           | Great comment, and this phrase is going in my pocket.
           | 
           | > write-only memory
           | 
           | Could this be The Secret(tm) to transmuting base lead into
           | gold? Rewriting the very memories that make up one's life.
        
             | Benjammer wrote:
             | For anyone else who isn't familiar, type 1 fun is where
             | it's a fun experience and you have fun memories of it. Type
             | 2 is a not-fun experience where you look back on the
             | accomplishment fondly. Type 3 "fun" is a tongue-in-cheek
             | description of something where you didn't have fun doing
             | it, and also don't have fond memories of it.
        
               | datavirtue wrote:
               | Team building events: type 3.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | beaconstudios wrote:
         | Journalling. If you keep a record of your thoughts and feelings
         | you can always go back and review them.
         | 
         | I've been working on some personal issues for a little while
         | now and sometimes it's hard to tell where I've made progress
         | due to this exact retroactive-perspective-shifting, until I go
         | back and read my journal from those earlier times and the
         | contrast becomes clear.
        
         | robfitz wrote:
         | I don't have a proper answer (because it's a good and difficult
         | question), but I sort of think of it as a context-dependant
         | thing.
         | 
         | E.g., During a customer interview where I'm trying to
         | understand what they've done (and predict what they'll do), I
         | have vanishingly low confidence in their self-predicted
         | behavior. So I prefer to try to look at what they've actually
         | done in the past, talk to them to understand why they did it
         | that way instead of some other way, tease out the invisible
         | data (like what they tried or researched but didn't continue
         | with), and then come to my own conclusion about how that's all
         | likely to extrapolate.
         | 
         | But in terms of understanding and ascribing purpose to my
         | experiences? Or understanding and empathizing with a friend or
         | stranger? Or sending a message out into the world in a way that
         | can stick and spread? In that case, it's kind of a subjective
         | thing to start with, and it's all about the stories. (To
         | clarify: not intentionally fanciful or fictional stories. Just
         | "stories" in the sense of how we tie all these things that
         | happen into something coherent and ordered.)
         | 
         | That was kind of a non-answer, and I'm sorry I can't be more
         | helpful. I only understand a very, very small number of things.
         | (Three, I think, although I'm working hard on understanding the
         | fourth.) Apart from those few narrow domains, I'm just fumbling
         | through it like everybody else.
        
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