[HN Gopher] Is my cat Turing-complete?
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Is my cat Turing-complete?
        
       Author : zdyn5
       Score  : 241 points
       Date   : 2021-11-24 12:40 UTC (10 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (belaycpp.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (belaycpp.com)
        
       | carabiner wrote:
       | Why do programmers like cats so much?
        
         | praptak wrote:
         | The null hypothesis here is that everybody likes cats.
        
           | ludamad wrote:
           | Indeed. Cats and dogs are part of endless marketing materials
           | for a reason. They're as generic appeal as it goes (something
           | something everyone loves babies)
        
         | poulsbohemian wrote:
         | -- Easy maintenance. They need food and cuddles, but they don't
         | need to be let out to potty ten times a day or require excess
         | walks.
         | 
         | -- They have a remarkably complicated inner life. This appeals
         | to creative types, who also often have a lot going on mentally.
         | 
         | -- They are conducive to the lifestyle, apart from wanting to
         | stand on my keyboard. They will sit in the cat tree or on my
         | lap for a long time, just wanting to be near. They will remind
         | you when it's time to stand up and stretch.
        
       | __alexs wrote:
       | What the author calls cat computing I like to call crab
       | computing. I think crabs are a better analogy because crabs have
       | successfully been used to perform logic operations in a lab and
       | cats have not.
        
         | telesilla wrote:
         | Warning, don't click if you need to be productive.
         | https://www.reddit.com/r/crabcats
        
           | colejohnson66 wrote:
           | And if you don't like Reddit's new interface:
           | https://old.reddit.com/r/crabcats/
        
       | monkowl wrote:
       | Even better: cats are not only Turing-complete but also Turing-
       | complete liquids! https://www.pbs.org/newshour/science/answering-
       | the-question-...
        
       | freddiecoleman wrote:
       | CATs are implemented in a turing complete language called
       | Chialisp https://chialisp.com/docs/puzzles/cats/
        
       | teddyh wrote:
       | Cats do not run optimal algorithms:
       | 
       | http://www.threepanelsoul.com/comic/on-a
        
         | rawling wrote:
         | Wow, that took me on a quick tour from "hey, I remember when
         | that comic was running" through "hey, that comic is running
         | again" to "hey, turns out that comic never stopped running?"
        
       | bitwize wrote:
       | That cat looks a lot like my Ashley, who died nearly 14 years ago
       | but is still missed. White chest patch, white toe tips, and all.
        
       | _Nat_ wrote:
       | It's apparent that the author of this article has independently
       | discovered the field of Catputation. However, this field has a
       | long and rich hissssstory, which I'll try to summarize as time
       | allows (or until I'm bored or see something shiny).
       | 
       | FIRST: The great potential for Catputation has been recognized
       | since pre-hisssstory, by the early innovators known as Egyptians
       | who awed at the great possibilities and awww'd at the great paws-
       | abilities.
       | 
       | In those days, Catputers were primarily used to perform primitive
       | functions, such as alerting household members of impending dawn
       | (known to those in the field as " _the early-morning zooomies_ ")
       | and high-frequency generation before electronic-oscillators were
       | discovered (known to those in the field as " _ddawww, the widdle
       | kittdy is purrrring!_ ").
       | 
       | Unfortunately, Catputation was limited in those days to largely
       | clumsy, analog tasks. For example, Catputers had difficulty
       | playing nicely with some peripheral systems, e.g. mice. It wasn't
       | until much later that [the first digital-logic gate was invented,
       | allegedly by Isaac
       | Newton](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pet_door#History), paving
       | the way for more advanced systems.
       | 
       | However, as we all know today, cats are fundamentally clawtum-
       | mechanical creatures.
       | 
       | Early on in clawtum-mechanical discovery, [Bose and Einstein were
       | studying Dogputation](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bose%E2%80%93
       | Einstein_statisti...). Dogputers have quanta which can share the
       | same space, [forming a
       | stack](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/dogpile) (known to those
       | versed in the art as " _dawwwww, look at dey widdle puppehs!_ ").
       | This would later lead to [online-enthusiasts stockpiling
       | Dogputation](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dogecoin).
       | 
       | However, in trying to form a stack for Catputation, Pauli made
       | two simultaneous, serendipitous discoveries. First, they
       | discovered that [kitties shouldn't be stacked up in the same
       | place](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pauli_exclusion_principle).
       | And secondly, that violating this newly-discovered rule can
       | result in many little bytes forming a larger unit (a
       | kill-0-byte). Together, these discoveries led to [an initial
       | theory of clawtum-Catputation](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ferm
       | i%E2%80%93Dirac_statistics).
       | 
       | Progressing forward, optical computing became all the rage, and
       | it was discovered that [optical-signaling interconnects were
       | effective in facilitating high-speed
       | Catputation](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLagODygcbs).
       | 
       | There's more hisssstory to be told, though that's it for now!
        
       | berkes wrote:
       | > one of the best ways to avoid misuses of a feature is to
       | perform these misuses once, in my opinion
       | 
       | I love this, because I'm convinced this is how we all learn.
       | 
       | How my cats learn too, by the way. Good thing they have nine
       | lives, because the amount of pans, doors, cupboards, firewood
       | that has fallen on top of them just for the sake of "I want to
       | know if I can misuse this new pile" is staggering.
        
       | csixty4 wrote:
       | > Though they can, maybe cats are not designed to execute code
       | after all?
       | 
       | I'll test this with my cat named Turing this weekend to see if he
       | gives better results.
        
       | secondaryacct wrote:
       | Ahah super, bien joue la frontpage sur HN !
        
       | s_dev wrote:
       | Really did think this was the unix command 'cat' being Turing
       | complete which makes sense.
        
       | Konohamaru wrote:
       | Cats aren't Turing complete because they don't have
       | intentionality. Everything it was doing was a result of instinct.
        
         | visarga wrote:
         | Not much gap between instinct and intention. You could say
         | instincts are default intentions selected by evolution.
        
       | ineedasername wrote:
       | I was almost out the door to pet shops and animal shelters so I
       | could build a 16 cat-core setup over Thanksgiving. Then I figured
       | I should at least read the full article before going through the
       | trouble. It's a good thing too. Now I know that I should probably
       | go for 64 cat-cores and treat it more like a quantum computer
       | with the potential for rapid decoherence.
        
         | dylan604 wrote:
         | So the crazy cat ladies are really hardcore compute nerds that
         | are just letting their cores rest?
        
         | d--b wrote:
         | So, the 'cat-bit' is worth 1 if the cat is alive and 0 if the
         | cat is dead? Now I understand why quantum computing requires so
         | much funding...
        
         | stinos wrote:
         | _64 cat-cores ... rapid decoherence_
         | 
         | I'm glad you figured that 64 cat-cores is basically pure chaos.
         | Well, for you, for the cores it's just their way of life: do
         | random stuff for no apparent reason. Which is like the exact
         | opposite of a computer.
        
           | ineedasername wrote:
           | Yes, if I can't get the system up & running for computational
           | tasks, I figure I can always pivot the business model and
           | sell its output as a world-class entropy source. My only
           | problem is the lack of a moat around the model since anyone
           | with a steady supply of cats, automated laser pointers, and a
           | few hundred $/month in kitty kibble can reproduce my setup
           | and make the whole thing a race to the bottom on price. I
           | think at that point I could turn my accumulated knowledge
           | into an excellent cat-entropy system servicing business,
           | fine-tuning and optimizing other people's setups, advising on
           | breed mixtures, laser speed, etc.
        
             | tmm wrote:
             | The business seems fraught with hairy (furry?) problems.
             | 
             | The laser system has promise, but you need a source of
             | random data to drive the movement of the laser pointer
             | (maybe strap them to other cats?). Otherwise, an attacker
             | who can predict the movement of your pointers may be able
             | to predict the output of your entropy stream after
             | observing the behavior of your cat colony (certain cats may
             | prefer to hunt at different times of the day, or prefer to
             | lay in wait and pounce vs giving chase, etc).
             | 
             | Alternatively, you could observe a field (bed) of cats and
             | record their chirality, assigning 0 to sinistral cats and 1
             | to dextral cats. The science[1] seems to indicate no
             | preference for one or the other per cat, so your readings
             | should be random. However, you may only observe one or two
             | bit-flips per hour and during transitions it may take some
             | time for the system to settle back down to a steady-state.
             | 
             | [1] http://blog.dimview.org/math/2017/07/28/cat-
             | chirality.html
        
               | ineedasername wrote:
               | >lasers
               | 
               | Good point. Would strapping a laser pointer to the back
               | of one of the cats work to seed the system? After that I
               | could divert some output into g-code movement
               | instructions to the automated lasers.
               | 
               | One thing I'm unsure of is room size. I figure I could
               | maps 1/0 to each tile in a grid based on the presence of
               | a cat, but that means with too large or small of a room
               | I'll have varying degrees of bit density. Stakes are
               | pretty high too, since I'm pretty sure the putting cats
               | in the mix might allow me to exceed the theoretical
               | maximum of 1 bit of entropy per bit.
        
         | kreeben wrote:
         | You could also buy just two then wait a while and through some
         | inexplicable magic, you'll gave 64 cores of cat.
        
           | zwirbl wrote:
           | But be aware the resulting catsplosion will grind the
           | simulation to a halt at some point
        
           | codetrotter wrote:
           | I've heard that in order for this to work it is important to
           | ensure that one of the cats is the Model M version and the
           | other must be a Model F version.
           | 
           | Equally important, you must respond "No" when asked whether
           | you want the "Neutering" feature enabled. This applies to
           | both cats.
        
           | howdydoo wrote:
           | Are these the big/little cores I've been hearing so much
           | about?
        
         | anotherevan wrote:
         | There's the makings of a science fiction novel in there,
         | somewhere.
        
         | zdyn5 wrote:
         | Going for the 5dm or 3dm node size?
        
         | crate_barre wrote:
         | Apple makes their own cats now days.
        
         | motohagiography wrote:
         | Like Searle's Chinese Room, but with a cat in it, where
         | observing it or asking it to do anything at all necessarily
         | yields nothing, because it's a cat. Searledingers Catbox?
         | 
         | But more generally I'd ask the question of, if you can train a
         | conscious animal to execute 8 brainfuck instructions (+, -, <,
         | > , etc..), could they also develop a writing system and
         | express higher order languge concepts? Asking why animals don't
         | write assumes they can't, as maybe we just need some kind of
         | intermediate symbolic phoneme concept, as though - like BF for
         | computation, there are some basic unit instuctions that you can
         | combine and parse into anything, and if a border collie can
         | distinguish words for hundreds of different things, I'd wonder
         | if what we're missing is a set of metaphors that represent this
         | underlying core instruction set.
         | 
         | Things like musical notation and knitting stitch patterns are
         | also thought to be Turing complete, so it implies the
         | representation doesn't matter for computation, and computation
         | is sufficient for representing most things, so the idea of
         | finding some underlying instruction set for producing languages
         | across species seems both fantastic yet loosely plausible.
        
           | simonh wrote:
           | I'm sure you could train dogs, monkeys, or parrots to
           | reasonably reliably perform logical operations. From that you
           | could build a simple processor, but the error rate might be
           | too high for it to scale much. It's not so much getting them
           | to do the tasks, it's getting them all to reliably do them at
           | the same time in synchronisation.
           | 
           | Of course as with the guy in the Chinese Room that doesn't
           | speak Chinese, none of the individual animals would have any
           | idea what the overall system was doing.
        
             | lloeki wrote:
             | > none of the individual animals would have any idea what
             | the overall system was doing
             | 
             | Strike "animals" out, and it sounds like any worker in a
             | big enough org. (Maybe I should stop reading Kafka)
        
             | VLM wrote:
             | There's a classic Charles Stross short story where, to
             | spoil the story, some old men apparently "randomly" playing
             | a board game to pass the time, are performing combinatorial
             | magick to fight a demonically possessed ... well don't want
             | to spoil the entire story. The background of the story is
             | magick is real and based on math and computer logical
             | operations and such. cstross used to post here occasionally
             | and worked as a sysadmin in the olden days.
             | 
             | Anyway, aside from fantasy/sci fi stories, the interesting
             | analogy with the story is just because I'm not smart enough
             | to debug the system given no blueprints or explanation,
             | does not mean an anthill is not running some novel and
             | possibly interesting computational problem. Or bees nest or
             | giant fungal mycelia in the dirt or herds of lobsters.
             | 
             | There are randomness detection and evaluation algos
             | (distantly related to compression algos) and now that we
             | have big data I suspect the next decades will have those
             | algos rubbed up against big data and we'll discover
             | interesting things about hive insects and what the hive is
             | thinking as opposed to what individual insects are
             | thinking. Or run it on dolphins or ancient human dwelling
             | architecture.
        
               | Ruthalas wrote:
               | Can you share the name of that short story?
        
               | Zircom wrote:
               | Not sure of the exact short story he's referring to, but
               | it must take place in his Laundry Files series
               | 
               | https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Laundry_Files
               | 
               | He also has another series which he just finished that is
               | very good as well about a family with the ability to step
               | between diffrent timelines that's an interesting
               | deconstruction of the trope.
               | 
               | https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Merchant_Princes
               | 
               | ******** _Spoilers*******
               | 
               | .
               | 
               | .
               | 
               | .
               | 
               | While it starts as starts as a fantasy series, it
               | eventually comes out their magic abilities are remnants
               | of advanced nanotech from an interdimensional empire.
               | Apparently a publisher he didn't like working with had
               | the rights to his next Scifi series, so he had to start
               | it as fantasy to get around the contract._
        
             | _jal wrote:
             | > but the error rate might be too high for it to scale much
             | 
             | That just means you need a redundant array of parrots
             | operating in parallel, with a regulator to detect different
             | answers to the same problem and retry.
        
           | crooked-v wrote:
           | There are several Youtube channels where people gradually
           | train cats and dogs to use boards full of buttons (20+
           | buttons in some cases) to communicate their wants. It
           | definitely seems to work in general but doesn't make the
           | animals any less themselves... one of the funnier examples
           | being a video of a cat repeatedly pressing the "outside"
           | button, staring at a yard full of snow, and then stalking
           | back and pressing the "mad" button several times. Simple
           | compound phrases (for example, "play friend" or "love
           | grandma") are fairly common, but any kind of actual syntax is
           | basically nonexistent.
        
             | thechao wrote:
             | All of the videos of these kinds I've seen were clearly
             | fake.
        
               | crooked-v wrote:
               | Here's one example:
               | https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGMTesZlKa0Lokb7ZNqOJXQ
               | 
               | And another:
               | https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEa46rlHqEP6ClWitFd2QOQ
        
         | 0xFFFE wrote:
         | Do these cat-cores need cryogenic cooling?
        
       | kzrdude wrote:
       | Does it have an infinite tape?
        
       | marcodiego wrote:
       | The other day there was a wasp going in and out of my room on the
       | second floor by the window. I closed the window because it was
       | annoying me.
       | 
       | The wasp found an entry through another window, in another room
       | open in the second floor. It was from the room next door. So, I
       | just closed this other window.
       | 
       | Again, it found an entry from another window. But this time, it
       | started to impress me: it was from a room across the corridor!
       | The wasp flew to the back of the house, found an open window,
       | entered it and mapped to path through the corridor to my room.
       | 
       | I then closed all the windows in the second floor of the house
       | and bet it was over. I was wrong: the wasp came in from the front
       | door, flow upstairs and found the room. It was even capable of
       | doing the path in reverse so it could come in and out of my room.
       | 
       | I closed all the doors and windows on the first floor, but forget
       | to close the small bathroom window. This was enough for the small
       | wasp map an entire new path to my room again almost immediately!
       | 
       | Once it entered my room again, I opened the window again. It was
       | smart enough to use it like it was simply choosing the shortest
       | path.
       | 
       | So, even the small brain of a wasp is able to run "computer
       | vision" algorithms and are fast running "machine learning"
       | algorithms. They are even able to run A* perfectly and merge
       | input from various sensors to perform superb navigation using
       | very little energy, producing almost not heat in a very
       | lightweight package in real time with very low latency!
       | 
       | I'm glad this critter is small. Nature is scary.
        
         | apricot13 wrote:
         | genuinely thought the last line in this was going to be and
         | then I found a wasps nest in the room next door!
        
         | YeezyMode wrote:
         | You may have already, but you'd enjoy reading 'Conscious Mind
         | Resonant Brain' by Stephen Grossberg.
        
           | marcodiego wrote:
           | Thanks for the hint/tip/advice. Never heard about it. Hope
           | you found my tone similar or with some close ideas.
        
         | jaclaz wrote:
         | What if I told you it wasn't the same wasp?
         | 
         | One wasp trasmitted a map of your house to another and another
         | one!
        
           | tiborsaas wrote:
           | Maybe it spoke with the same accent
        
             | praptak wrote:
             | It had a red mohawk.
        
           | marcodiego wrote:
           | Your comment may sound like a joke but bees are known to
           | transmit direction and distance to one another and are also
           | able to solve complex problems:
           | https://www.popsci.com/science/article/2010-10/bees-beat-
           | computers-ability-solve-complex-math-problem/
           | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Waggle_dance
        
             | jaclaz wrote:
             | Yep, it was intended as a joke, halfway between a citation
             | of The Matrix and the known joke about the Scottish black
             | sheep: https://www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/susan/joke/3.htm
             | 
             | Of course bees can communicate between them, and probably
             | also wasps.
        
             | berkes wrote:
             | I'm a beekeeper, and one of the most profounding things to
             | show people when they (anctously) look over my shoulder is
             | this "bee waggle".
             | 
             | It is clear and easy to see, (easier than that d* b* of a
             | queen when you need her, most often), and it tells a lot
             | about the cognitive abilities of a social group, the hive.
             | How they can tell eachother complex directions by twerking.
             | 
             | Kids love it too. And will often play around, wiggling
             | their behinds (a cousin called it bee-twerking) and
             | giggling how they are showing eachother where the sweets
             | are by dancing.
        
         | not2b wrote:
         | The wasp might be using smell to figure out the way into your
         | house; any odor would come out of any open window.
        
           | dietr1ch wrote:
           | It might be using A* then :P
        
             | marcodiego wrote:
             | Exactly! The intensity of the smell is a perfectly fine
             | consistent heuristic.
        
             | [deleted]
        
         | Stratoscope wrote:
         | Was it a paper wasp? They are so cute and friendly.
         | 
         | This little one didn't mind a bit when I put my macro lens an
         | inch or two away, and even did some tricks to show off!
         | 
         | https://geary.smugmug.com/Macro/i-VsCPgMS/A
         | 
         | https://geary.smugmug.com/Macro/i-3xN7pMk/A
        
           | marcodiego wrote:
           | Can't tell, but looks similar.
        
       | praptak wrote:
       | The ops don't seem to compose though.
       | 
       | Cats are smart critters, so I think it would be possible to train
       | one to do a set of operations that's actually Turing complete.
       | Cat behaviourists and comp sci folks could work together on this.
        
         | hef19898 wrote:
         | There is a guy in Russia who trained cats to do all kinds of
         | circus tricks. Going from personal experience, a cat would be
         | better suited to get a human to the calcalution for the cat
         | then the other way round. If said cat is bored enough to bother
         | trying so.
        
       | Intermernet wrote:
       | Cats are a superset of Turing completeness. Cats are "undefined
       | behaviour"
       | https://bugs.launchpad.net/ubuntu/+source/unity/+bug/1463112
        
         | rob74 wrote:
         | > _To replicate: In unity hit ctrl-alt-l, place keyboard on
         | chair. Sit on keyboard._
         | 
         | I would recommend using a cat if available - otherwise,
         | depending on the chair and on the weight of the tester, this
         | might lead to permanent damage to the keyboard. I would
         | definitely refrain from doing this if said keyboard is attached
         | to a laptop.
        
         | sdoering wrote:
         | Thank you so very much. This just landed in my bookmark list of
         | great bug reports that made my day.
         | 
         | I really like the way the community dealt with this.
         | 
         | (Disclaimer: My SO and me are also a foster home for cats. The
         | cat behavior described is relatively normal esp. for one cat
         | model currently "in use" here.)
        
         | noisy_boy wrote:
         | Chaos Cat - the final QA tester. Ensure that your service can
         | survive it.
        
           | rob74 wrote:
           | Chaos Cat, a.k.a. the fluffy fuzzer...
        
           | HenryKissinger wrote:
           | Chaos engineering is a thing.
           | 
           | https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chaos_engineering
        
       | peanut_worm wrote:
       | I tried to repeat this experiment and my cat had a Segmentation
       | Fault
        
         | stinos wrote:
         | You mean an undefined period of Sleep()?
        
         | deusum wrote:
         | You can expect a core dump.
        
           | dylan604 wrote:
           | Only if a sandbox is available for that routine
        
       | [deleted]
        
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       (page generated 2021-11-24 23:01 UTC)