[HN Gopher] Post-SSRI sexual dysfunction
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Post-SSRI sexual dysfunction
        
       Author : taxyovio
       Score  : 169 points
       Date   : 2021-10-28 11:33 UTC (11 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (rxisk.org)
 (TXT) w3m dump (rxisk.org)
        
       | mmastrac wrote:
       | Interesting flip-side: the anti-depressant Tradazone can cause
       | Priapism.
       | 
       | I don't think we understand nearly enough about these systems,
       | though I'd argue that anti-depressants are still a big net
       | positive.
        
       | brunoTbear wrote:
       | Anecdata: an ex experienced this on SSRIs. Was brutal on her and
       | tough for me. A friend had the same issue.
       | 
       | Antidepressants are an awfully tough thing to get right. Whenever
       | my friends talk to me about them I recommend therapy and all the
       | other things before starting ssris or the other families of brain
       | drugs.
        
       | cwwc wrote:
       | Hmm.. a bum side effect especially since it looks like that SSRI
       | antidepressant might be a treatment for covid.
        
         | [deleted]
        
       | kortex wrote:
       | PSSD seems to be in part mediated by desensitization of 5HTP1A
       | receptors. Psychedelics are known to modulate 5HTP1A and increase
       | plasticity of serotonin neurons. This would logically be another
       | research avenue for psychedelics.
       | 
       | I could not find anything substantial on this specific avenue in
       | a brief literature search, but the mechanism is there, and
       | anecdotally people have reported success.
       | 
       | We need to de-schedule these drugs. At the absolute minimum, we
       | need to get rid of the vile Schd 1 "no medical uses" to allow
       | their research to be more politically/financially palatable.
        
       | symlinkk wrote:
       | Has anyone taken SSRIs and actually thought it was worth it? I
       | have severe social anxiety and I'm trying to decide if I should
       | try medication or not.
        
         | slowmotiony wrote:
         | Yes, 100% worth it for me.
        
         | maxehmookau wrote:
         | Yes. I have been taking sertraline for over a decade and it has
         | literally saved my life. I was able to become the person I
         | always wanted to be without social anxiety overtaking my life
         | at every corner.
         | 
         | Please don't take any advice from anyone on HN, including me.
         | This community often attracts armchair anecdoctors. Go and
         | speak to a doctor.
         | 
         | Good luck.
        
         | ivraatiems wrote:
         | Anecdotally, yeah. It's worth it. To be frank (I'll comment
         | more on this elsewhere) I think the risk of _permanent_ sexual
         | dysfunction or any other permanent effect is dramatically
         | overblown by articles like this one. The short-term and while-
         | you 're-taking-it side effects are real, but for me and many
         | others well worth it.
         | 
         | Everyone in my family has some sort of anxiety issue.
         | Citalopram (with the help of therapy and lifestyle changes)
         | helped me overcome severe anxiety, helped my brother stop
         | throwing up whenever he got in a too-high-pressure situation,
         | and gave my sister the willpower to move out of my parents'
         | house and get a job.
         | 
         | They're good drugs with frustrating downsides. That's life. I'd
         | still recommend them.
        
         | txsoftwaredev wrote:
         | Yes. I've been on/off (mostly on) them for around 20 years. It
         | started when I was young and a girl broke my heart. I just
         | couldn't get out of my "funk". I started taking Zoloft and it
         | gave me a life again. I probably have social anxiety and I am
         | def. more comfortable in public and around people I don't know
         | when I'm on an SSRI. I am not as negative and cynical and have
         | hope for the future. I don't want to take them, wish I didn't
         | have too but even with consistent exercise, therapy etc. it
         | just wasn't enough without the medical help.
        
         | prionassembly wrote:
         | Many many summers and a thousand years ago, I went to a pdoc to
         | complain of anxiety issues. I left (after a good hour+ of
         | talking) with a bipolar 2 diagnosis. The diagnosis was correct:
         | at low doses, lamotrigine/Lamictal behaves like an
         | antidepressant (and you have to taper in slowly to prevent bad
         | reactions) and I flipped the fuck out in euphoric mania. I
         | shortly after went on lithium and never regretted it. I started
         | having dreams that seemed to resolve my deeper
         | "psychoanalytical" issues. It really fixed me up.
         | 
         | This has been like 15 years ago. The more I learn, the more it
         | seems I was the textbook case doctors never expect to meet.
         | People are not generally aware that dysphoric mania is a thing.
         | A good diagnosis can change your life.
        
         | superflit2 wrote:
         | I am not saying it is not for you.
         | 
         | But please consider alternatives as CBD or a healthier routine.
        
           | symlinkk wrote:
           | What makes CBD healthier necessarily? Curious of your
           | viewpoint
        
             | n8cpdx wrote:
             | It doesn't cause permanent long term sexual dysfunction,
             | and all the 2nd order effects that entails.
        
             | superflit2 wrote:
             | From the people I know personally.
             | 
             | Situation 1. Interview next day.
             | 
             | They can't sleep, can't focus. Like they are rolling on
             | their bed all the time but no real sleep.
             | 
             | Then on the next day when they have the interview their
             | cognition is exhausted and tired. Solution: CBD helped them
             | sleep better like in 40 min.
             | 
             | Situation 2. Meeting or having a situation that they will
             | be anxious. (meeting, new job,etc).
             | 
             | CBD before makes the "negative voices" stop.
             | 
             | I talking CBD only.
             | 
             | You will not feel high or anything.
             | 
             | Indeed you will forgot that you use it but then you will
             | not be anxious. Meaning -> it does not give a "kick" that
             | you feel. suddenly you are relaxed and "forgot" about being
             | anxious.
             | 
             | I was a person that thought the medicinal effects were
             | "exagerated" so the ""hipppies"" could use it. But then
             | once I saw it working I changed my prejudice.
        
               | bduerst wrote:
               | My experience with CBD is that it will knock you out and
               | give you a deep sleep on day 1, but the more you use it
               | the harder it is to sleep without it. Almost like the
               | payday loans of falling asleep.
        
             | R0b0t1 wrote:
             | It's not just libido. It's lethargy, weight gain, lack of
             | mental motivation, brain fog. There's a lot of SSRI side
             | effects.
        
         | blockmarker wrote:
         | Yes, but it is not an aspirin. Before trying medication try
         | therapy with a psychologist.
        
       | sterlind wrote:
       | Anecdote: I had severe OCD from childhood through my first year
       | in college, triggered by separation from my parents (who never
       | got me therapy despite extremely obvious signs.) I had multiple
       | panic attacks per day resulting in
       | depersonalization/derealization, I was failing my classes etc.
       | 
       | Logically I knew that my mom wouldn't die if I didn't stop my
       | room fan at its maximum rotation or if I didn't make the sign of
       | the cross 2^n times. But mental illness is illogical. What "good
       | coping skills" would fix that?
       | 
       | Psych put me on Prozac, which numbed every feeling but panic,
       | which it didn't touch. I got relief from a bad trip on 2C-E, in
       | which I had such a severe panic attack that it permanently
       | destroyed that identity and left me with depersonalization. The
       | old me was dead, so over the following months I built a new one.
       | OCD apparently got erased with the rest of me. I successfully
       | went off Prozac by quitting it cold turkey and stayed off SSRIs
       | for a decade.
       | 
       | I guess the takeaway is: serious mental illness exists,
       | platitudes about life wouldn't help, SSRIs didn't help either but
       | didn't make me dependent, and psychedelics are a crapshoot.
        
       | ljm wrote:
       | This was one of the factors that made me think twice about going
       | back on anti-depressants, until I made peace with the fact that
       | my ability to orgasm wasn't going to pull me out of the hole I
       | was in. It's a shitty choice but the desire to not be suicidal
       | forces your hand.
       | 
       | It's literally like flipping a switch. One day, the plumbing
       | works. The next day, it doesn't. Many times I'd just give up, out
       | of boredom.
       | 
       | The side-effects are clearly stated but to use myself as an
       | example, I vastly underestimated just how strong they would be.
       | 
       | That said, if you're dealing with the big black dog as it were,
       | don't use it as a reason to avoid anti-depressants if you really
       | need them. Keep your doctor up to date about the side-effects so
       | they can adjust your prescription. And don't be shy just because
       | you're talking about your private parts.
       | 
       | And make sure you have a therapist too.
        
         | lost-found wrote:
         | You ever look into ketamine for treating depression?
         | 
         | Self medicated this past weekend and had some major
         | breakthroughs with my long time depression/suicidal intrusive
         | thoughts. Nice thing is you don't have to stay on it unlike
         | other antidepressants--I would never do a medication that you
         | have to constantly take.
        
           | thanatos519 wrote:
           | Try 2F-DCK. Many benefits but no K-hole.
        
           | ghostbrainalpha wrote:
           | I just lost a friend to Ketamine, and there is another thread
           | on the front page about someone famous who destroyed their
           | life with it.
           | 
           | Ketamine seems like a miracle but a ton of people cant
           | control their usage of it at all. Even if you think you know
           | how addiction works, Ketamine sneaks up on you in a way
           | cocaine, heroin, and oxytocin do not.
           | 
           | Please be careful.
        
             | lost-found wrote:
             | Of course, I am very responsible with my illicit drug use.
             | Probably did < 50mg across several night and am not
             | planning on doing it again for 6+ months. Good advice
             | though for everyone!
        
           | standardUser wrote:
           | "I would never do a medication that you have to constantly
           | take."
           | 
           | Tell that to your heart doctor when you're 70.
        
             | lost-found wrote:
             | Probably will.
        
           | ljm wrote:
           | I appreciate the concern but, honestly, it's exhausting to
           | keep fielding 'have you tried...', 'have you looked into...',
           | 'have you explored...' questions.
           | 
           | I get that it comes from a good place, but I'm sharing my
           | experience, not asking for advice.
           | 
           | The best help you and others can offer is to just listen,
           | instead of offering another solution.
           | 
           | There are two replies to me in the 'have you tried' vein. I'm
           | not aiming it at you specifically, just trying to stop a
           | pattern.
        
             | lost-found wrote:
             | I get what you're saying. The only reason I suggested
             | looking into it is because they are seeing hugely promising
             | results (70%+ reported improving symptoms) but you only
             | have to do a few sessions. It's not another pill you have
             | to take each morning.
        
             | neverendingsigh wrote:
             | For what it's worth, from at least one person's perspective
             | it's exhausting to just _read_ these replies, as if you or
             | other OPs are eternally naive neophytes with no experience
             | or understanding, or that providing a personal anecdote is
             | automatically, implicitly, and irrevocably requesting
             | advice. This tends to be the case with a lot of medical
             | discussions online, but especially with mental health.
             | 
             | (It would be somewhat better if these questions were asking
             | for advice themselves--"Have you tried $medication? It's
             | been recommended to me and I'm interested in others'
             | experiences"--but it's almost always "Surely you haven't
             | tried ($medication || $lifestyle_change || $religion ||
             | just_grow_up()) because I have and it's a panacea.")
        
               | ljm wrote:
               | Thanks. I just want to share and be heard, and maybe
               | someone can relate.
               | 
               | Good intentions all around, but people need to understand
               | that you're not always someone to be helped or saved. It
               | can feel quite disempowering at times.
        
           | cwkoss wrote:
           | Ketamine can be pretty rough on the bladder and kidneys.
           | Please read up on the risks. It is definitely dangerous to
           | take recreational doses several times per week - it seems
           | that low/moderate doses every week or two avoids most of the
           | problems while still providing therapeutic effects, but
           | definitely keep an eye on the health of those systems,
           | ideally with letting your doctor know so they can help.
           | 
           | Many of users on /r/researchchemicals using either ket or
           | novel analogs at recreational doses regularly for both fun
           | and depression relief end up with bladder issues after over-
           | consuming for a period - so while it's a promising depression
           | treatment, I'd recommend caution around dosage and frequency
           | and titrating to find your minimum effective dose.
        
             | [deleted]
        
             | lowercase1 wrote:
             | Recreational doses are 10x-30x that of medical doses and
             | those effects are quite a bit less at medical doses
             | 
             | https://astralcodexten.substack.com/p/drug-users-use-a-
             | lot-o...
        
             | lost-found wrote:
             | Of course, anything taken in excess has risks.
        
         | ivraatiems wrote:
         | Have you considered augmenting with something like Wellbutrin?
         | Some people find it helps with the side effects. I've tried it
         | myself and while I found it was too anxiety-inducing (I felt
         | too keyed up) there's truth to that at least.
        
           | ljm wrote:
           | No, not personally. I eventually was able to come off the
           | medication. Took a couple of weeks to get back to some
           | semblance of normal but I'm sure there's permanent damage
           | still.
           | 
           | That said, it's not easy to walk away from suicidal
           | depression (and attempts to commit suicide) without a decent
           | helping of trauma, and potentially even PTSD. So, of course,
           | there isn't really a 'normal' to go back to once you've got
           | the awareness of that and how far down the rabbit hole you
           | fell. Normal becomes something else.
        
             | ivraatiems wrote:
             | Wellbutrin has no sexual side effects (the opposite, in
             | fact) and is very effective for depression (but not
             | anxiety). You might want to give it a try if you are still
             | struggling. Of course, it comes with its own tapestry of
             | possible issues.
             | 
             | Either way, hope you are doing OK/OK enough.
        
       | wayoutthere wrote:
       | Ugh. Yes. Not meaning to be crude here and I'm incredibly
       | sympathetic to the men I date, but as a woman in her late 30s
       | it's hard to find a man my age who _doesn't_ have problems
       | getting  / keeping it up. Most of them link back to
       | antidepressant use.
       | 
       | What about modern society drives the need for such widespread use
       | of antidepressants? Is that something we should be willing to
       | give up? It hasn't _always_ been this way, has it?
        
         | n4r9 wrote:
         | > What about modern society drives the need for such widespread
         | use of antidepressants?
         | 
         | There's little space for compassion and sociability. Most
         | people in the West spend 8 hours a day working through an
         | endlessly growing backlog of demands, all the while justifying
         | each hour to clients and managers, then go home to drink and
         | watch TV or scroll through news feeds. Our brains are not
         | suited to constantly worrying over the demands of others while
         | being so disengaged from social face to face contact.
        
           | Broken_Hippo wrote:
           | "There's little space for compassion and sociability"
           | 
           | I would argue there is more space now than there used to be.
           | 
           | I mean, women were basically property at one point, with
           | changing degrees of freedom. You might not get out of the
           | house much, depending.
           | 
           | Folks working as servants around 1900 basically had to do
           | what their employers said, even if that meant you simply
           | weren't allowed to have a romantic partner.
           | 
           | We kept _slaves_ , and unfortunately, some folks still do.
           | 
           | We are probably lucky to spend only 8 hours a day on things,
           | and I'm really happy that housework doesn't take up a lot of
           | time now. Doing housework or working long hours doesn't grant
           | you much space for compassion nor sociability.
           | 
           | The television and feeds are hobbies and entertainment. The
           | folks in the past did similar stuff, and they had their own
           | outcries - books, bicycles, women's ankles, and so on.
           | 
           | Drinking has been with us for literally Millenia. The amount
           | of drunkards has varied alongside whatever it is we feel is
           | "too much" - in other words, drinking daily wouldn't be
           | strange if that is in the culture, but it is possible that
           | same culture would frown on daily drunkenness.
        
             | iammisc wrote:
             | > I mean, women were basically property at one point, with
             | changing degrees of freedom. You might not get out of the
             | house much, depending.
             | 
             | Can we please stop just repeating cliches that are not even
             | obviously true? While certain countries certainly had these
             | notions, this is not a universal.
             | 
             | And even in cultures with strong 'female ownership', the
             | picture you're painting is incredibly wrong. While women
             | may be considered 'basically' property, they would
             | constantly be socializing with one another. They would be
             | out of their house often with other women and their
             | children. The appearance of 'ownership' would only be from
             | the vantage point of men.
             | 
             | For example, looking at Middle Eastern society, it's
             | completely false to say women don't get out of the house.
             | Women have entire portions of the house to themselves,
             | where they and their female friends can get together, talk,
             | interact, and gossip without any interference from men,
             | including their own husband.
             | 
             | Today we are way more atomized. Many people work, watch TV,
             | and sleep. That's sad. We used to spend most of our day
             | with friends and family. Even the slaves would.
        
         | yjftsjthsd-h wrote:
         | > What about modern society drives the need for such widespread
         | use of antidepressants? Is that something we should be willing
         | to give up? It hasn't always been this way, has it?
         | 
         | It's completely possible that there's something messed up in
         | modern society that causes depression, or in medicine that
         | diagnoses depression and/or prescribes antidepressants, but the
         | null hypothesis would be that before modern times, people
         | were... just depressed. And then more recently that they'd try
         | treating it with cocaine/meth/etc. Or that they'd fail to treat
         | it, and some percentage of those people would commit suicide,
         | and the remainder would never admit that there was anything
         | wrong, both of which mean the outcome you observe wouldn't
         | happen.
         | 
         | Again, this isn't to say there isn't a more interesting answer,
         | just that you have to at least consider the _possibility_ that
         | it 's _not_ something about modern society.
        
           | iammisc wrote:
           | Depression is relative. Today on social media, people come
           | away with the false conclusion that they are meant to feel
           | euphoric most of the time.
           | 
           | I don't believe in 'feeling happy', yet every magazine
           | promises me i'll be happy if I just do X. Instagram says if I
           | just follow <blah>, my life will become infinitely better.
           | It's all a joke. I never feel happy, but I am not depressed.
           | And more importantly, I have no interest in constant
           | happiness... how boring. Most days I just feel meh. Sometimes
           | I feel hungry.
        
           | nradov wrote:
           | We know that exercise is an effective antidepressant for some
           | people. In pre-modern times people were generally more
           | physically active so I suspect that prevented a lot of
           | depression symptoms.
           | 
           | https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/exercise-is-
           | an-...
        
         | iammisc wrote:
         | I am a straight man, so have no experience with other men
         | obviously, but this is fascinating. How can it be that so many
         | of us are on antidepressants? Something is surely wrong as
         | you've said right?
         | 
         | There may also be selection effects as men in their late 30s
         | may not have 'paired up' so to speak due to depression. But
         | still, I'm curious if anyone has stats on how many people are
         | on these drugs.
        
           | wayoutthere wrote:
           | About 15-20%. But that's _just_ the antidepressants; sexual
           | dysfunction can also be caused by blood pressure medication,
           | epilepsy meds, etc. Anecdotally I would say regular sexual
           | dysfunction among men over 35 is probably closer to 50%.
           | 
           | I don't know how this compares to past eras though.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | ralusek wrote:
         | Trouble in that department is also heavily impacted by men just
         | generally being more sedentary, having poorer diets, and due to
         | those reasons and more, having lower testosterone. Also,
         | consuming pornography in much greater amounts than previously
         | available to people is known to cause serious problems here.
        
           | 1_player wrote:
           | Yes, changing diets, better sleep and giving up porn works
           | wonder in my case. I'm in my mid 30s and never had any sexual
           | dysfunction, but relatively small changes cause major changes
           | in my perceived feelings of "potency", if you will.
           | 
           | Fatty meats, cholesterol heavy foods (butter, eggs), vitamin
           | D have the biggest effect on me, still less than just simply
           | giving up porn.
        
         | prionassembly wrote:
         | I tied the knot in my early 30s, but friends who chose to
         | remain free agents (even having had opportunities to marry
         | someone great) report that the market thins out more and more
         | as time goes by. And these are men, with easier access to a
         | younger pool.
        
           | wayoutthere wrote:
           | I wouldn't say women have it much different -- I end up
           | dating a lot of significantly younger men. It is harder to
           | have much in common outside of physical attraction with
           | someone too far from your age group though.
        
             | prionassembly wrote:
             | My wife is actually five years older than me. But we met on
             | a night club and made out before talking too much and it
             | stuck. I think we developed a crush on each other in the
             | ensuing daytime dates, came to admire each other and
             | recognize common values. But we had kissed first and tested
             | the chemistry.
             | 
             | People overthink dating and mating. We'd all probably be
             | reasonably happy on arranged marriages. With apologies for
             | the non-inclusive language of an old song, "woman needs man
             | and man must have his mate, on that you can rely as time
             | goes by".
        
               | wayoutthere wrote:
               | 5 years isn't that much difference and you still share
               | some cultural overlap. I've dated people who are closer
               | to 15 years younger and it was hard to have more than a
               | physical relationship because our personalities were
               | formed in such different contexts.
        
         | Broken_Hippo wrote:
         | _What about modern society drives the need for such widespread
         | use of antidepressants?_
         | 
         | Honestly, the "about" is that we've developed medicines that
         | aren't nearly as horrible as the medicines of yesteryear.
         | Prozac wasn't marketed until the 80's, and a lot of other
         | things have been marketed since then. Marketing is key too - it
         | is really hard to take this stuff if you don't know something
         | is available. And misery has been with us for quite some time.
         | 
         |  _Is that something we should be willing to give up?_ Well, no.
         | Giving up antidepressants means that people suffer more. We
         | could work on reducing the general population 's suffering and
         | anxiety. We aren't 100% sure on how to do this, it seems, but
         | we know things like easily affordable health care and a safety
         | net helps out lots.
         | 
         |  _It hasn't always been this way, has it?_ Actually, yes. And
         | no. I 'm not convinced that housewives that used to take
         | vallium in the 70's were taking it because they were happy, for
         | example. We didn't always think to write about this stuff -
         | doubly so when going on about it could get you in a non-modern
         | mental hospital. The 'no' is simply because we can do something
         | about it now. I like to think we are more compassionate overall
         | now, but I have no real reason to think this.
        
           | nradov wrote:
           | Exercise is as effective as antidepressants for some
           | patients.
           | 
           | https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/exercise-is-
           | an-...
        
             | Broken_Hippo wrote:
             | I don't see how that is relevant here. I'm guessing
             | relieving financial stress is really effective in some too.
             | 
             | So what?
             | 
             | It doesn't help all patients, which means that we just
             | can't cure everyone with exercise. Hence, we'd be worse off
             | without them as some folks would suffer more.
        
               | nradov wrote:
               | It's relevant because there are a variety of therapies
               | available. No single treatment will work for all
               | patients. Medication is sometimes appropriate but it
               | isn't always the best option.
        
         | m00x wrote:
         | It's not about society, it's about having the option now.
         | 
         | I have severe anxiety and I always just accepted it. After
         | taking 75mg/day of Effexor, I don't have that anxiety anymore
         | and I can function like a normal human. I'm in my mid-30s and I
         | can have sex 3-4x/day easily and it still functions like when I
         | was 15.
         | 
         | I wouldn't blame it all on anti-depressants, since sexual
         | issues for 35+ year old men are common even without them.
         | Blaming anti-depressants is convenient though since no one
         | wants to blame it on genetics/health.
        
         | lewispollard wrote:
         | > What about modern society drives the need for such widespread
         | use of antidepressants? Is that something we should be willing
         | to give up? It hasn't always been this way, has it?
         | 
         | GPs have very limited amounts of time for individual patients.
         | Therapists, counsellors and psychiatrists are expensive and
         | have mixed results, and require a significant time investment
         | from the patient and the professional. It may be a long time
         | before any kind of talk therapy has results. For many people
         | who go into a doctor's office complaining of depression
         | symptoms, it will go away within a reasonable timeframe. In
         | many countries, there are waiting lists for any kind of further
         | treatment.
         | 
         | The whole situation adds up to handing out SSRIs as a first
         | line treatment when anyone comes to a GP reporting depressive
         | symptoms; it's cheap, it buys time, it gives the patient a
         | feeling that they're doing something to work on their issue,
         | and gives them time to sign up for further support and get
         | through their waiting list. As far as the GP knows, in most
         | cases, side effects are rare. For many people coming in with
         | mild depressive symptoms, there is some temporary life factor
         | that will go away within the first course of treatment, and
         | with it the symptoms, and that is a "success" for the SSRI
         | stats.
         | 
         | Of course, anyone who's been on SSRIs of various types for any
         | longer length of time knows that's bullshit, and they're quite
         | serious substances with prolonged side effects and withdrawals.
         | I really hope the situation changes.
        
         | Tade0 wrote:
         | > It hasn't always been this way, has it?
         | 
         | As a man in his 30s growing up I witnessed a shift in attitudes
         | from "just man up" to "seek help", so there's that.
         | 
         | If anything I would suggest humanity to give up dating apps.
         | They're essentially making people feel inadequate and pay for
         | the dubious privilege.
        
           | wayoutthere wrote:
           | Dating apps are awful, but were a lot better once I
           | challenged my standards (and lowered them a bit; I'm not the
           | young hottie I used to be and that was a hard realization).
        
           | prionassembly wrote:
           | Feeling inadequate is integral to the cherchez-la-femme
           | experience. But it's probably better to be humiliated in
           | night clubs (where eg. women sometimes will pretend not to
           | even see you) than in apps; ego defense mechanisms have less
           | of a chance there. Also: actually kissing tells you _a lot_
           | that detailed self-reported profiles will never do -- the
           | "chemistry" thing is real, sometimes two people find someone
           | cute and stylish but the kissing doesn't work.
        
       | [deleted]
        
       | mzs wrote:
       | I've experienced the sexual side effects. For me they lessened
       | over time (going from mostly not being able to achieve climax to
       | that rarely happening) and taking a lower dose helps. For those
       | that are not at risk of seizures they can take bupropion as well
       | to decrease the dose of the other SSRI further.
       | 
       | But honestly sex is mostly in the brain and not finishing every
       | time is only a drag if you think that it is. Personally I find it
       | liberating, sex becomes a fun intimate pass time without an end
       | goal. And certainly the benefits to my depression and anxiety out
       | weigh the negatives for me.
        
       | agumonkey wrote:
       | Anybody knows about the neurology of libido ? not the
       | biomechanical sequence (attractive person -> nerve impulse ->
       | blood flow etc)
       | 
       | Talking about the higher representations of the other person's
       | body, why proximity / touch causes all these mental discharges.
        
       | michaelgrafl wrote:
       | On the flipside, if you have problems with premature ejaculation,
       | taking one of those might mitigate the issue.
       | 
       | Not a doctor, by the way.
        
         | jac241 wrote:
         | Yes they are indicated for that.
        
         | sigotirandolas wrote:
         | Probably. Clomipramine, a TCA, is sometimes used for premature
         | ejaculation.
        
       | selexin wrote:
       | I don't usually post here, especially on such personal topics,
       | but feel I should. I've been on SSRIs and SNRIs for some time now
       | (Pristiq, and now Zolof), and can definitely attest to the some
       | of the changes described in the article. I clearly remember
       | reading the documentation in full that came with both drugs
       | before starting each, and the mentioned side effects were only
       | mentioned in passing, along with possibly every other side effect
       | imaginable, so it was very easy to dismiss - especially when you
       | are in a place you know you need help out of. There was also no
       | real warning of long term side effects from both doctors that
       | have prescribed me. I guess I don't have any real point, other
       | than if you are considering anti-depressants do more research
       | than I did before taking what you've been prescribed - and if in
       | doubt get answers from your doctor, and failing that find a
       | better doctor (if you can).
        
         | xattt wrote:
         | Sertraline (Zoloft) often causes more sexual side effects in
         | males than it does in females. I have seen this used at the max
         | dose to control hypersexual behaviour in a patient with
         | dementia.
        
           | matheusmoreira wrote:
           | It's also used to treat premature ejaculation. Side effects
           | can be really useful in the right context.
        
           | FilMo wrote:
           | First of all, I need to say I always pay attention to all
           | side effects indicated. I really treat with caution every
           | prescription I get. As for Sertraline, I noticed that the
           | generic one I got from https://www.canadapharmacy.com/ has
           | less sides than the branded one. Don't know why there is the
           | difference, but it still calms me down a bit.
        
           | ljm wrote:
           | I spent about 18 months on sertraline. Even on the
           | 'therapeutic' dose that I started off with, it basically
           | nuked my ability to perform. Could still get an erection
           | easily enough, the frustration was being unable to do
           | anything with it.
           | 
           | It wasn't that much better with fluoxetine, but with that I
           | found that I could at least wait a few days to sort of build
           | up the energy.
           | 
           | As with another poster here, I'm happy being open about this
           | stuff too. The first hurdle is opening up about mental
           | health, I think that already puts you on a good track to take
           | the shame away from the sexual aspect.
        
         | 300bps wrote:
         | When I was in my mid-20s my doctor wanted me to take blood
         | pressure medication because when I went to her office in the
         | morning I had blood pressure of 150/110. I told her I wanted to
         | see what I could do on my own first.
         | 
         | I cut out salt and caffeine, increased potassium and exercised
         | every day. I went back in two months and my blood pressure was
         | 120/80. She took it four times because she didn't believe it. I
         | think the primary thing was the caffeine - it just gives me a
         | temporary but strong spike in blood pressure.
         | 
         | Years later, a doctor prescribed me Lexapro. I actually picked
         | up the prescription. But I never took it. I started exercising
         | every day, started mindful meditation, removed sugar from my
         | diet, read the book Learned Optimism and did the CBT-like work
         | in there. Ended up never taking the SSRI but haven't had
         | anxiety in 7 years. (btw Learned Optimism was recommended to me
         | on HN).
         | 
         | Some people definitely need medication - I worked with a guy in
         | his early 20s that had cholesterol of 400+. I saw him eat
         | oatmeal every day for breakfast and lunch and then saw his
         | cholesterol go up to 420. I'm sure there are people that need
         | SSRIs. But it does seem like doctors at least prescribed it to
         | me when I didn't need it.
        
           | matheusmoreira wrote:
           | Lifestyle changes are the best treatment there is. Shame they
           | can't make a pill out of it. Statistically most people fail
           | to maintain lifestyle changes over the long term. Especially
           | dietary changes.
           | 
           | Pharmacological treatments allow doctors to help those
           | people.
        
             | silexia wrote:
             | I have never had a doctor recommend lifestyle treatments to
             | me. They don't make any money on those. I have
             | osteoarthritis in my hip and multiple doctors recommended
             | an immediate hip replacement. I did a ton of research and
             | ended up on the anti-inflammatory index diet in combination
             | with changing exercises from running and golf that put high
             | impacts on my hip to cycling which does not. All of my pain
             | was gone in three months and has stayed gone for the last
             | two years.
        
           | wara23arish wrote:
           | I got back from the doctor last week due to some chest pains.
           | He was more worried about my high blood pressure 130/90.
           | 
           | Every time i measure it at home its 110s/70.
        
           | cwkoss wrote:
           | Have you heard of white coat syndrome?
           | https://www.healthline.com/health/white-coat-syndrome
           | 
           | Recently learned about it, and based on my own measurements,
           | seems I have it to some extent.
        
           | speeder wrote:
           | Probably eating the oatmeal that made his cholesterol get
           | higher.
           | 
           | There are now tons of research coming out about how cereals
           | (wheat and corn specially) are basically the culprit of a lot
           | of diseases that in the past were blamed on "fat", and also
           | that this past blame was partially due to corruption (for
           | example coca-cola literally gave six digits money to Harvard
           | scientists so they would lie and say sugar was safe and the
           | culprit for people problems was meat).
        
             | voldacar wrote:
             | dietary cholesterol has a negligible effect on blood
             | cholesterol levels. Almost all cholesterol in the body is
             | endogenously created
        
               | rhinoceraptor wrote:
               | There's a U-shaped curve for all cause mortality with
               | cholesterol levels, just like anything else. Cholesterol
               | is not bad, it's literally the building block of steroid
               | hormones, vitamin D, etc.
               | 
               | Similarly, there's a good argument to be made that most
               | people actually eat too little salt. If you compare most
               | sodium guidelines to data of sodium intake versus all
               | cause mortality, you're more at risk of death following
               | the guidelines.
        
             | shlant wrote:
             | > Probably eating the oatmeal that made his cholesterol get
             | higher.
             | 
             | I... don't think so
             | 
             | https://www.health.harvard.edu/heart-health/research-were-
             | wa...
             | 
             | https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2016/10/161007085247.
             | h...
             | 
             | https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5885279/
             | 
             | https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/01/080108102225.
             | h...
             | 
             | https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5394769/
             | 
             | > There are now tons of research coming out about how
             | cereals (wheat and corn specially) are basically the
             | culprit of a lot of diseases
             | 
             | Care to share more on what you are referring to?
        
               | aserdf wrote:
               | (not op) for reference, 39g of oats contains 28g of
               | carbohydrates.
               | 
               | https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/nutritionsource/what-should-
               | you...                 - The biggest influence on blood
               | cholesterol level is the mix of fats and carbohydrates in
               | your diet--not the amount of cholesterol you eat from
               | food.       - Although it remains important to limit the
               | amount of cholesterol you eat, especially if you have
               | diabetes, for most people dietary cholesterol is not as
               | problematic as once believed.
        
               | sizzle wrote:
               | What's up with the conflicting info on carbohydrates?
               | Should I skip the bowl of oatmeal every morning?
        
               | bruce343434 wrote:
               | This seems to be a thing for pretty much every
               | food/nutritional category. I've decided for myself to
               | just "ignore" the science since the definition of
               | "healthy" seems to change so often. Instead I try to use
               | common sense for picking my meals.
        
         | haolez wrote:
         | In my case (Pristiq), it was a net positive. My libido
         | decreased (but never desapeared) and I've never had erectile
         | disfuncion so far. Totally worth it for me, with my specific
         | metabolism.
        
         | BoiledCabbage wrote:
         | As a herbal observation, it seems like such a scam that medical
         | pamphlets will list possible side-effects, but not frequencies.
         | 
         | Knowing that one person in one thousand saw some issue is very
         | different from 20% of people. Especially as almost every
         | medication I've ever seen advertised has a list two pages long
         | of possible side effects.
         | 
         | How is a person supposed to make an informed judgment?
        
           | sofixa wrote:
           | I don't know if it's the law here in France or just nice
           | manufacturers, but I've seen side effects broken down by
           | occurence rate ( 1 in 100,000: X, Y, Z; 1 in 1,000,000: A, B,
           | C, etc.) multiple times.
        
           | cwkoss wrote:
           | > herbal observation
           | 
           | What does this mean?
        
             | foxyv wrote:
             | Autocorrected from honest or personal I believe.
        
               | BoiledCabbage wrote:
               | Yup, and I didn't catch it in time.
        
           | s1artibartfast wrote:
           | All US drugs have to include the rate of side effects in
           | their clinical trials.
           | 
           | Google " _Product name_ prescribing information "
        
           | watwut wrote:
           | The frequencies are there, they were in all pamphlets I read.
           | It is a law.
        
       | jamal-kumar wrote:
       | SSRIs need to be obsolesced already. Screw the sexual
       | dysfunction, how about increaased risk of suicidal ideation? How
       | about them taking two entire weeks to work?
       | 
       | The thing is the rest of the world doesn't seem to feel the
       | burning desire to get as many people on them as possible and even
       | have alternatives which aren't as limited. Reversible MAOI drugs
       | like moclobemide have been around since the 90s and while they
       | have a higher interaction profile (Can't mix it with anything
       | serotonergic basically, so no amphetamines or cocaine or other
       | antidepressants, which is fine), the reduced side effect profile
       | is considered a bonus and the biggest reason for lack of adoption
       | of this along with other treatments (It's astonishing how long we
       | have known about the ketamine thing without using it) happens to
       | just come down to marketing and doctors scared off by the early
       | MAOIs where you need to strongly consider diet. The new stuff
       | even reportedly improves sexual function. And you can't get it in
       | the USA.
        
         | diskzero wrote:
         | I am in the US and I have never heard of the treatments you
         | mentioned. I guess this is your point! This makes me very sad.
         | I am glad a SSRI worked for me, but I know that a percentage of
         | people will also be at great risk for self-harm.
        
         | ironmagma wrote:
         | Not to mention the sometimes lifelong brain zaps which are
         | truly disturbing and make trying to go to sleep a terrifying
         | experience.
        
           | bruce343434 wrote:
           | > lifelong brain zaps
           | 
           | Could you expand on this? Is this the "exploding head
           | syndrome" where you have an incredibly "loud" hallucinatory
           | experience just as you fall asleep?
        
             | ironmagma wrote:
             | I am not a doctor and do not know the difference between
             | brain zaps and EHS (or whether there is one), but this
             | article[1] summarizes it well.
             | 
             | For me, it is a loud sound but sort of within the head,
             | accompanied by the sensation you get when you receive an
             | electrical shock, which of course startles you awake. This
             | unfortunately occurs just at the boundary between
             | consciousness and sleep, which after it happens a few times
             | in a row can put you off the idea of even trying to sleep.
             | Occasionally I did awaken thinking there had been a literal
             | explosion in the building.
             | 
             | I haven't taken SSRIs for 3 years and still get them,
             | albeit less than when I was weaning off of them.
             | 
             | [1] https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/brain-
             | zaps#how-the...
        
         | pyronik19 wrote:
         | SSRIs took me from being unable to function and leave my home
         | due to social anxiety to knocking out the bulk of my symptoms
         | and having a solid 15 years of being socially and professional
         | productive. I'd prefer we keep them.
        
           | ironmagma wrote:
           | There are probably a number of other drugs that could have
           | done that, though.
        
             | R0b0t1 wrote:
             | Heroin, interestingly enough. IIRC they screened pain
             | medicine recipients for depressive symptoms and in this way
             | determined opiates relieve major depression more
             | efficaciously than SSRIs.
        
               | ironmagma wrote:
               | Yes, and a close relative (oxycodone) is something I've
               | had experience with and can confirm it's quite good at
               | curing the depression. The problem is the permanent brain
               | damage and/or death it will cause when taken long-term.
               | Link < https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/research-
               | reports/hero...>
        
           | romwell wrote:
           | I've had a very positive experience with SSRIs as well
           | (Sertraline).
        
         | bduerst wrote:
         | MAOIs have potentially serious dietary interactions and side
         | effects. They can cause serotonin sickness just by taking it
         | with OTC tryptophan supplements.
         | 
         | SSRIs are not perfect but have a safer track record of being a
         | first-attack against depression and anxiety, before having to
         | resort to bigger guns like MAOIs.
        
       | [deleted]
        
       | foobarian wrote:
       | Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor (SSRI)
       | 
       | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selective_serotonin_reuptake_i...
        
       | efields wrote:
       | I was prescribed cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and Prozac.
       | The CBT did far more for me. I dumped the Prozac after a few
       | months. I have bad days and good days, but I know how to get
       | through the bad ones now. I know what prompts them and even when
       | its hard to think positively I still know that I won't think
       | things are as bad tomorrow.
       | 
       | YMMV! A lot!
       | 
       | As I get older I feel healthier when I move, touch people, give
       | love and get love.
       | 
       | In the US, we _do not prioritize health_, physical nor mental.
       | We're surrounded by shit food. We're "insured" basic baseline
       | function, and improvement often has to come out of our own time,
       | energy, and money. If you're in a relaxed white collar
       | environment, its easy to duck out for an hour of therapy. If
       | you're on the clock, it's almost impossible. This is the bigger
       | issue.
       | 
       | Again, some ppl DO need SSRIs or they will harm themselves or
       | others. But always pair with some form of talk therapy and get
       | some daily exercise.
        
       | stefanwlb wrote:
       | From another post about COVID treatment. Welcome to world wide
       | sterilization.
       | 
       | "If WHO recommends this, you will see it widely taken up," said
       | study co-author Dr. Edward Mills of McMaster University in
       | Hamilton, Ontario, adding that many poor nations have the drug
       | readily available. "We hope it will lead to a lot of lives
       | saved."
       | 
       | The pill, called fluvoxamine, would cost $4 for a course of
       | COVID-19 treatment. By comparison, antibody IV treatments cost
       | about $2,000 and Merck's experimental antiviral pill for COVID-19
       | is about $700 per course. Some experts predict various treatments
       | eventually will be used in combination to fight the coronavirus.
        
       | vimy wrote:
       | Wellbutrin has the opposite effect. It makes you feel 15 years
       | old again.
        
         | tonyarkles wrote:
         | One thing I find super interesting is how that side effect is
         | pretty inconsistent even in the same person. I'm currently on
         | Wellbutrin/Zyban/Bupropion as a smoking cessation aid and am
         | not having that side effect this time. But last time I was on
         | it for the same reason... oooooohhhhh boy, yeah, it's a good
         | thing that I had a partner who was good with that!
        
           | antiterra wrote:
           | It's possible some of the variation is from the specific
           | manufacturer or manufacturing process. In the case of
           | Wellbutrin XL, generic brands have even been recalled due to
           | not being bioequivalent (https://www.medicinenet.com/script/m
           | ain/art.asp?articlekey=1...)
           | 
           | I have been told by a doctor that effects appear inconsistent
           | across brands or places of manufacture, even with non-
           | recalled generics. You should always consult with your own
           | medical professionals about your medication, but you can
           | often ask for a different generic at the pharmacy.
        
         | kayodelycaon wrote:
         | That's because Wellbrutin is an NDRI (norepinephrine-dopamine
         | reuptake inhibitor). It's a stimulant.
         | 
         | It's actually a third-line medication for ADHD and is sometimes
         | used with other medications to counteract the sexual side-
         | effects of other medications.
        
       | hellojesus wrote:
       | I want to kill myself every second of every day, and it's been
       | that way for 15ish years now.
       | 
       | The only thing, fleeting as it may be, that I find worthy of
       | doing in life is sex, and these ed side effects have kept me from
       | exploring the potential for a world in which I don't to cease to
       | exist or murder in the sake of nihilism.
       | 
       | I'd rather destroy the lives of those around me or others'
       | randomly than live without sex. It's just a function of my
       | utility curve.
       | 
       | Unfortunately and as counter intuitive as it may seem, I'm very
       | cautious of skin to skin diseases such as hsv and hpv, which has
       | kept me from hiring prostitutes, even though the only thing in
       | life I want is exactly that.
        
         | sillysaurusx wrote:
         | I was in a similar position to you (minus the murder part). The
         | only thing that pulled me out of it was Prozac. I wrote up my
         | experiences here:
         | https://twitter.com/theshawwn/status/1392213804684038150
         | 
         | I have sex on a regular basis, and it's not nearly as bad as
         | these side effects make it sound. It's different, sure, but you
         | can definitely have enjoyable sex.
         | 
         | You need to take antidepressants every single day for at least
         | 30 days before you'll notice any effect whatsoever. _Every_
         | day, without fail. If you haven 't tried that yet, I urge you
         | to; it was nothing short of miraculous, and there was no reason
         | for me to live so many years in misery.
        
           | R0b0t1 wrote:
           | That last part isn't true. People report credible effects of
           | positive mood immediately. The issue is you can't necessarily
           | trust these self-reports and it takes roughly 1-2 weeks for
           | someone with a clipboard to start writing down results that
           | correlate with a perceived increase in mood.
           | 
           | Some adverse reactions to SSRIs are so bad people will kill
           | themselves if they go a month. If it doesn't feel right you
           | should just stop taking them.
        
             | sillysaurusx wrote:
             | That last part is my own experience. It was so true for my
             | case that I nearly didn't discover Prozac at all, because I
             | gave up after the first week. It wasn't until many years
             | later that I knuckled down with the consistency, since I
             | had nothing to lose.
             | 
             | As it turned out, I had everything to gain.
             | 
             | All of this should be done with the supervision of a
             | doctor.
        
           | hellojesus wrote:
           | Thank you for taking the time to post this. I'll take a look
           | at your experiences and consider taking action.
        
             | R0b0t1 wrote:
             | If you try anything, ask for Wellbutrin first if it is not
             | the first thing prescribed. There are usually not any
             | libido or lethargy issues.
             | 
             | You may have ADHD and may want to get tested for it. I'm
             | looking for a doctor to go to again, but being an adult the
             | ones I've seen so far think I just want drugs.
             | Complications from ADHD look a lot like depression.
        
               | hellojesus wrote:
               | This is really interesting. May I ask why you came to the
               | ADHD conclusion in the first place? Was it solely the
               | correlation between depression/anxiety and adhd?
               | 
               | I did a quick search and came across a few articles such
               | as the following one: https://totallyadd.com/23-signs-
               | you-do-not-have-adhd/
               | 
               | I was surprised to find I exhibit many of these symptoms.
               | Most prominently having stacks of things throughout the
               | office/house which contain various half-worked projects
               | or hobbies or just general information. My shieldmadien
               | constantly complains about the "disaster" and is always
               | shocked when she asks where something is, and I'm able to
               | go straight to the pile of junk which contains exactly
               | what she's looking for.
               | 
               | Other things like time being an elusive concept or going
               | to another room to get something and then getting there
               | and having no idea what I am supposed to be doing are
               | also frequent occurrences. I know where my car keys are,
               | but that's only because I have a very specific plastic
               | tray on the kitchen counter that is supposed to contain
               | them and my wallet. If they disappear from there because
               | I get distracted between walking into the house and
               | emptying my pockets then it's usually a hunt for them.
               | 
               | I tend to bounce between new projects but get obsessively
               | engrossed with them at the start... and then just never
               | complete them.
               | 
               | Not sure if I actually have it, but it is an interesting
               | thought.
        
               | sillysaurusx wrote:
               | I don't think libido or lethargy is the most important
               | consideration. The consideration is whether it eliminates
               | suicidal thoughts. For me, Prozac was the only thing that
               | worked, and this advice would've led me astray.
        
               | R0b0t1 wrote:
               | If you want to discount libido that is at least halfway
               | excusable, but that depends on the individual. Lethargy,
               | which almost always comes with libido issues, is more
               | problematic, as it causes weight gain and a corresponding
               | decrease in life expectancy.
               | 
               | It an be hard or impossible to combat. I've had people
               | tell me they discontinued their medication due to weight
               | gain (or libido issues, as in this thread).
        
         | hansor wrote:
         | Don't worry too much, you are not alone mate, and it's
         | perfectly normal to ADORE sex!
         | 
         | That why it is at the same level as breathing, eating and
         | shitting in:
         | 
         | - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow%27s_hierarchy_of_needs
         | 
         | ps. Having sex in rubber with prostitute is safer in terms of
         | HPV/HSF infection then with average female in UK without any
         | protection (especially with Y gen) :) So I would not worry
         | about it THAT much.
        
         | elwell wrote:
         | Sorry to hear that. Do you think it's a function of your
         | philosophical beliefs?
        
           | hellojesus wrote:
           | Which part?
        
         | yosito wrote:
         | I'm sorry you feel that way. It sounds difficult. I believe
         | there are many things that could help you find more pleasure in
         | life and also find more fulfilling sex. I recommend searching
         | for those things, and looking for people who can help you. But
         | I'm actually commenting to point out that sex with a prostitute
         | doesn't have to be risky, despite stereotypes. Most prostitutes
         | are frequently tested for infectious diseases, and most will
         | have no objection if you ask to see a recent clean test. Very
         | very few prostitutes will have unprotected sex. And you could
         | even find a less active prostitute who doesn't have sex with
         | many people. The biggest risk is probably legality, depending
         | on where you're based. But, assuming you have legal access to
         | it, I would recommend seriously considering it. It's a fair
         | exchange of something you have, for something you need that
         | could really help you get what you want out of life. As long as
         | it's between consenting adults, there is no problem with safely
         | exploring this option. One note that I would recommend if you
         | do pursue it is to also pursue personal growth at the same
         | time, because few people find that sex with a prostitute was
         | what they really wanted, and you may find that what you really
         | want in life will take a lot of work to achieve.
        
           | hellojesus wrote:
           | Thank you for your response. I appreciate it.
           | 
           | The problem I have concerning diseases and prostitutes is
           | that, although many get tested often, almost all testing
           | excludes hsv and hpv unless specifically requested. And since
           | ~12% of the population carry hsv-2, which can shed
           | asymptomatically and be contracted from skin-to-skin groinal
           | contact, it seems that it's an eventuality if I pick up
           | prostitution long term, and then it's for life.
           | 
           | Condoms help, but they're not perfect. I asked on a forums
           | once if prostitutes would be okay if I wore condom shorts
           | such as the following link, and I was told that (1) the hobby
           | was not for me, (2) the probability of contraction given the
           | use of condoms is low enough not to be a consideration, and
           | (3) the item probably wasn't tested under the same standards
           | as condoms so probably isn't as safe (I figure latex material
           | such as this would be a find physical barrier).
           | 
           | https://m.aliexpress.com/item/1005001595057592.html?spm=a2g0.
           | ..
           | 
           | I'm still contemplating it but am having trouble digesting
           | the sti risk. The legal risk doesn't bother me.
           | 
           | Edit: auto-correct
        
             | ghostbrainalpha wrote:
             | I was where you are for about 10 years. Don't give up hope,
             | it can end.
             | 
             | Also have you tried websites for "sugar babies" instead of
             | an actual prostitute. Someone who is willing to get tested,
             | and sleep with you regularly but doesn't have the same risk
             | profile as a prostitute?
        
               | hellojesus wrote:
               | I've considered it but haven't had much luck.
               | 
               | For a period of time in the past I ran a small porn
               | production shop wherein I would hire and then get recent
               | test results from models. But TTS, the industry standard,
               | doesn't test for hsv or hpv so I gave up while I was
               | ahead.
        
             | voldacar wrote:
             | For someone who wants to die constantly, you seem very
             | concerned about taking good care of your body and health.
             | 
             | Not insulting you, I know how weird and contradictory
             | humans can be. It's just interesting.
        
               | hellojesus wrote:
               | I know. It's ridiculous, and I hate it, but that's my
               | mental state. I think I wrote it was counter intuitive in
               | my initial post because, as you point out, it's as
               | rational as pi.
        
       | slowmotiony wrote:
       | A different anecdotal experience from my own use (10mg Lexapro) -
       | I've always had a problem with premature ejaculation. Was trying
       | all kinds of tricks like doing math problems in my head during
       | sex or trying different breathing techniques - all of that was
       | useless, once I started taking Lexapro it's like it flipped some
       | switch in my head and I can basically go as long as I like now,
       | and finish almost on command. Absolute game changer, it's a
       | fantastic improvement to my quality of life. I also take 5mg of
       | Cialis daily, which definitely helps with erections.
        
         | sizzle wrote:
         | Ummm I'm pretty sure the cialis is keeping the blood engorged
         | where it needs to be. Why not try an experiment, lose the
         | cialis and see if you can "keep it up" so to speak. (This is
         | not medical advice, I'm speaking hypothetically fyi)
        
       | exdsq wrote:
       | A big thanks to everyone commenting for helping normalise mens
       | mental health <3
        
       | robbie-c wrote:
       | This is interesting. I'm a founder of an app[1] that deals with
       | this ballpark of issue, by providing (among other things) couples
       | with sensate focus therapy, which is a form of sex therapy that
       | has an extremely strong evidence base, and is a pretty standard
       | go-to for libido issues.
       | 
       | We definitely have users that have experienced PSSD and have
       | found our app helpful, and the underlying therapy techniques
       | _are_ proven.
       | 
       | [1] https://www.blueheart.io
        
       | chilmers wrote:
       | I took SSRIs for a year in my late twenties. They had no effect
       | on my depression, but resulted in permanent sexual dysfunction.
       | My own fault for not properly researching the potential long-term
       | side effects, I suppose, but it certainly wasn't raised as an
       | issue by the prescribing doctor either. I hope someday there will
       | be cure of some kind.
        
         | michieldotv wrote:
         | I feel you. I was on escitalopram in my twenties too for a
         | depressive episode. It wrecked my libido and 10 years down the
         | line there is hardly any sign of improvement in sight.
         | 
         | I have a very understanding spouse, luckily, but I'm honestly
         | devastated in not being able to accommodate this dimension of
         | our relationship anymore.
         | 
         | Recently, my GP offered to prescribe me antidepressants again
         | for an episode of burnout, but I'm absolutely not keen to go
         | down that road again. I get that it's cheaper and more
         | available than therapy, but I've been burned before.
        
         | revolvingocelot wrote:
         | A close friend took an SSRI, citalopram, for a year in his
         | early twenties and he got that too. It wasn't permanent, though
         | ("full") recovery took almost a decade! Keeping in mind
         | varying-milage and a sample size of one, he's vaguely suggested
         | that his recovery was speeded by working out muscles in his
         | hips. Perhaps a combination of our Western sedentary lifestyle,
         | our proclivity to sit in computer chairs all day, and the
         | effect of the SSRI? Far be it from me to dispense medical
         | advice, but working to open one's hips and doing some squats
         | probably can't hurt, even if it doesn't actively help.
        
         | slowmotiony wrote:
         | Have you tested your hormone profile (blood test)?
         | Testosterone, Free T, Estradiol, Prolactin, Progesterone, SHBG
         | - you could check if all of those are in range because that
         | might be the root cause of your issue. There were studies done
         | where use of SSRIs was causing elevated levels of serum
         | prolactin.
        
           | chilmers wrote:
           | Interesting, thanks. I did do a basic consumer blood test
           | which reported my testosterone as "normal" (whatever that
           | means), but I should probably do a more in-depth one and
           | check these things.
        
             | slowmotiony wrote:
             | Yup, I strongly recommend you do at least the ones I
             | mentioned above, it's possible that your issues could be
             | very simple to fix.
        
             | iammisc wrote:
             | https://www.artofmanliness.com/health-fitness/health/how-
             | to-...
             | 
             | ^ has information on why 'normal' isn't a good range for
             | everyone.
        
               | [deleted]
        
               | stimpson_j_cat wrote:
               | > I'm not a doctor or a medical expert
               | 
               | > The Art of Manliness participates in affiliate
               | marketing programs
               | 
               | Seems like a terrible resource. Much better would be
               | blood work at your PCP (and a possible referral to an
               | endocrinologist).
        
               | iammisc wrote:
               | Endocrinologists are terrible at knowing what hormone
               | ranges are good for your age and sex. As a man with
               | thyroid problems, I am thoroughly disabused of the idea
               | that most endocrinologists have any clue what they're
               | talking about. Certainly, for a middle aged women, must
               | can put it together, but barring that, you're better off
               | on facebook groups.
        
         | LurkingPenguin wrote:
         | When did the sexual dysfunction begin? During treatment,
         | immediately after or was there a delay between the time you
         | stopped taking the medication and when it began?
        
       | robbiex88 wrote:
       | In my early 20s (male) I was prescribed (read: pushed) citalopram
       | by my family doctor. I took it for about a year. I'm in my early
       | 30s now and sometimes STILL suffer from the inability to reach
       | orgasm. I stopped taking the medication and when I realized it
       | was in fact the medication interfering with my love life, and
       | unfortunately realized too late. I've read alot about this after
       | the fact and am surprised this reached HN. Nothing really to add
       | to this conversation but its reassuring to know I'm not alone.
        
       | Igelau wrote:
       | Takes me a little longer on Zoloft. My psychiatrist and I agreed
       | this is more of a good thing than a bad thing. The crippling
       | anxiety I had without it was much worse for my libido.
       | 
       | That being said, I wish we understood these drugs better, because
       | I know the side effects and efficacy vary in the extreme. I know
       | for some people it's like trying to put out a fire with gasoline.
       | 
       | Continued anecdata: when I forget to get my refill, the
       | withdrawal is terrible. Dizziness, malaise, and "brain zaps". One
       | of these days I'm going to have to wean off of it carefully
       | before I try psychedelics.
        
         | mehphp wrote:
         | I'm not a doctor, but I'd caution against trying psychedelics
         | at all if you had crippling anxiety before.
         | 
         | I didn't realize just how bad my anxiety could get until after
         | I did Psilocybin. It wasn't the root cause of my anxiety, of
         | course, but it sure as hell exacerbated it to the point of
         | being pretty debilitating.
         | 
         | I'm now on 25mg of Sertraline, which has all but wiped out my
         | anxiety.
        
       | lkjfklajsdfpsdf wrote:
       | I'm diagnosed with MDD. I was prescribed an SSRI and was not made
       | aware or informed of the sexual side effects. Thankfully after
       | quitting them my libido has restored but to the other extreme
       | where I'm constantly horny.
        
       | kayodelycaon wrote:
       | I've had significant problems with my anti-psychotic before my
       | psychiatrist and I found a proper mix. Given I frequently deal
       | with hypersexuality, there was no way I'd stay on medication long
       | term if that wasn't fixed.
       | 
       | For the curious, Wellbrutin is the medication we added. It helps
       | me with depression, ADHD, sexual issues, and some anxiety.
        
       | bostik wrote:
       | I must be a weird outlier. While I can agree with the article's
       | opening ("Close to 100% of people who take antidepressants
       | experience some form of sexual side effects") I can't, at least
       | from personal experience, subscribe to the main message.
       | 
       | As my wife can attest, when I was on SSRIs, I was hornier than
       | usual.
        
       | ivraatiems wrote:
       | I think this article is a little alarmist. Warnings like these
       | scared me away from SSRIs for a long time despite their likely
       | efficacy in helping treat my symptoms.
       | 
       | I sent a number of articles like this one (and several of the
       | medical publications it cites) to my psychiatrist. To her credit,
       | she read them, and her response was that she agreed this kind of
       | permanent change is possible, but it is extremely unlikely.
       | (Anecdotally, she told me, she's treated thousands of people with
       | SSRIs and had never had a report of something like this; she
       | hadn't heard of it happening until I showed her case studies.)
       | 
       | I don't think that means my doctor is ignorant - I think that
       | means permanent damage is indeed likely very uncommon.
       | 
       | Here is a write up from Lorien Psych (the day job of Scott
       | Alexander at Slate Star Codex) that I think is evenhanded:
       | https://lorienpsych.com/2020/10/25/ssris/
       | 
       | Alexander has his issues, but this is an area where he's actually
       | an expert and his approach to the topic helped me a lot.
       | 
       | As for me, the benefits of a relatively low dose of an SSRI have
       | really outweighed the risks so far.
        
         | staticman2 wrote:
         | Your psychiatrist may have had patients suffering from this
         | that never told her.
         | 
         | They would have discontinued the medication, terminated the
         | doctor patient realationship, then waited for things to "go
         | back to normal" when they were off the drug but found it never
         | did.
         | 
         | In fact they may have voiced concerns to her and she may have
         | said "it will go back to normal if you discontinue the drug".
         | But they never went off the drugs until they fired her as their
         | doctor, so she would never know about the subsequent problems.
        
           | ivraatiems wrote:
           | That's possible but it's an awful lot of speculation. She
           | also might have had lots of patients who did so well on SSRIs
           | they stopped seeing her and just had their GP prescribe the
           | medication from then on. Or all her patients might have
           | overdosed on an unrelated drug and died. You can come up with
           | lots of scenarios other than the most likely one.
           | 
           | But this:
           | 
           | > They would have discontinued the medication, terminated the
           | doctor patient relationship, then waited for things to "go
           | back to normal" when they were off the drug but found it
           | never did.
           | 
           | is not the way a good psychiatry practice (like the one I
           | frequent, IMO) is designed to work. You try a lot of
           | different things and you see what works. You're told upfront
           | that this is part of the process and that if you don't like a
           | medication, you don't have to keep taking it, and you should
           | tell the doctor why and what you're open to trying next.
           | 
           | I tried buspirone (which I still take), duloxetine
           | (intolerable GI side effects; didn't take for long enough to
           | experience anything sexual), and bupropion (too stimulating,
           | not right for my condition) before I settled on citalopram. I
           | had been specifically avoiding citalopram because I was
           | scared of it, and I feel a little foolish for that now.
           | 
           | So I think your scenario is unlikely in my case. I can't
           | speak for other doctors.
        
             | staticman2 wrote:
             | You don't have to keep taking the drug, I agree. But the
             | doctor will give you another instead, and if the
             | dysfunction continues it will be assumed to be a
             | "temporary" symptom of the subsequent drug like it was with
             | the old drug.
             | 
             | You won't go "cold turkey" to see if things go back to
             | normal unless you fire the psychiatrist because frankly, in
             | America at least, psychiatrists are pill pushers and,
             | unless you are wealthy and will pay out of pocket, you will
             | only get insurance covered talk therapy with a cheaper
             | psychologist or social worker.
             | 
             | Psychiatrist are often only there for quick discussions
             | about medication. The time intensive talk therapy is done
             | by someone less expensive. In my area psychiatrist will
             | often partner with therapy practices and only handle the
             | drug side of things. If someone stops taking drugs, there
             | would be no reason to see the psychiatrist.
        
               | ivraatiems wrote:
               | > You won't go "cold turkey" to see if things go back to
               | normal unless you fire the psychiatrist because frankly,
               | in America at least, psychiatrists are pill pushers and,
               | unless you are wealthy and will pay out of pocket, you
               | will only get insurance covered therapy with a cheaper
               | psychologist or social worker.
               | 
               | This is just not my experience, sorry. Perhaps this is
               | true of the majority and I got lucky, or perhaps you have
               | had some very negative experiences worth sharing, but I
               | have never felt pressured to do anything I didn't want to
               | do. After I tried duloxetine, I waited several months
               | before trying anything again (except the buspirone which,
               | as I mentioned, I'd been on the whole time). I met with
               | my psychiatrist regularly during that time. It was all
               | covered by insurance.
               | 
               | In fact, going directly from one SSRI to another without
               | cross-tapering is not standard practice and can be quite
               | debilitating. If your physician did this to you, they
               | were not doing their job correctly.
               | 
               | > Psychiatrist are only there for quick discussions about
               | medication. The time intensive talk therapy is done by
               | someone less expensive.
               | 
               | True, but not really relevant, I think. If medication is
               | what you want, a psychiatrist is who you should have.
               | Choosing the right one can be a challenge, I agree, but
               | that doesn't make their profession not valuable.
        
               | staticman2 wrote:
               | I meant cold turkey as a synonym for no longer on drugs,
               | I should have phrased it differently.
               | 
               | I never said psychiatrists pressure patients. I said they
               | only treat patients on drugs. If the patient decides to
               | go off drugs that's the natural end of the relationship.
               | 
               | You replied and said you saw a psychiatrist when you were
               | still on a anxiety drug and the insurance paid for it.
               | Well, of course they did, you were taking a drug.
               | 
               | You are correct that some patients could stop taking an
               | SSRI and still see a psychiatrist.
               | 
               | I'm also correct that many patients who have gone off the
               | drug to see if the sexual dysfunction stops will probably
               | no longer be making appointments with the psychiatrist.
               | What would be the point? If they want to talk to someone
               | that's what therapists are for.
        
               | ivraatiems wrote:
               | > You replied and said you saw a psychiatrist when you
               | were still on a anxiety drug and the insurance paid for
               | it. Well, of course they did, you were taking a drug.
               | 
               | The insurance company doesn't know what you are
               | discussing in your sessions and isn't going to let you
               | see or not see a specialist just based on whether they
               | prescribe you meds. That's not how it works - or not how
               | it should be working if your insurer is acting
               | appropriately. I also saw this psychiatrist a couple of
               | times before taking anything. I didn't walk out of my
               | first session with a prescription for buspirone.
               | 
               | > I never said psychiatrists pressure patients. I said
               | they only treat patients on drugs. If the patient decides
               | to go off drugs that's the natural end of the
               | relationship.
               | 
               | It is, but that doesn't mean you just immediately stop
               | seeing them and never communicate again. That's not how
               | it works - with a good psychiatrist at a good practice.
               | You taper off, verify the taper worked and you have no
               | further issues, and _then_ stop seeing them if you want.
               | 
               | > I'm also correct that many patients who have gone off
               | the drug to see if the sexual dysfunction stops will
               | probably no longer be making appointments with the
               | psychiatrist. What would be the point? If they want to
               | talk to someone that's what therapists are for.
               | 
               | You need to provide some data for this assertion if you
               | are going to keep making it. The point is that the
               | psychiatrist, as the person overseeing your care, is the
               | person you would naturally tell about a problem you were
               | having. I don't think "go off the drug and just stop
               | talking to the doctor" is the normal behavior, I think
               | it's more like "tell the doctor you're going off the
               | drug, confirm you went off the drug, the doctor asks if
               | you want to try another drug, you say no, and then you
               | stop talking to the doctor."
               | 
               | I'm sure some people do just stop taking whatever they're
               | taking and never speak to their doctor's office again -
               | but most practices are set up to prevent that, because
               | you'd have to actually cancel an appointment and ignore
               | phone calls in order to get to that point. Doctors hate
               | risk by and large, and letting patients randomly
               | discontinue drugs with no supervision is not something
               | they generally want to incentivize.
        
               | staticman2 wrote:
               | "tell the doctor you're going off the drug, confirm you
               | went off the drug, the doctor asks if you want to try
               | another drug, you say no, and then you stop talking to
               | the doctor."
               | 
               | This is completely consistent with the patient never
               | telling the doctor that, to their surprise, after waiting
               | months the SSRI side effects never go away.
               | 
               | I feel like you are arguing against my choice of phrase
               | but not the substance of what I had to say.
               | 
               | When a patient terminates treatment doctors do not tell
               | their patients "be sure to make a followup with me in 6
               | months after going off the drugs in the event you are
               | permenently injured by the drug side effects in a
               | condition that has no cure. I won't be able to help you
               | but please pay me to chat about it."
               | 
               | The article this thread links to indicates there is no
               | cure, so any patient who has done research would know
               | discussing it with a psychiatrist would be useless.
               | 
               | And of course I have no data, you told an anecdote and I
               | responded with a comment along the same lines.
               | 
               | I made a pretty small claim, that your psychiatrist may
               | (not did have, may have) had patients with a condition
               | they didn't discuss with her, that only became known to
               | the patient after treatment had concluded. If you think a
               | minor claim like that requires "surveys" or data, believe
               | what you want, I don't know what to tell you.
        
               | ivraatiems wrote:
               | > This is completely consistent with the patient never
               | telling the doctor that, to their surprise, after waiting
               | months the SSRI side effects never go away.
               | 
               | That's true, that could certainly happen. I'm more
               | skeptical about the rate at which it happens -- but also,
               | if it is happening, presumably a patient will eventually
               | go back to someone in the medical system and mention it.
               | Whether they connect the dots is a question, but one
               | which can be studied.
               | 
               | > I made a pretty small claim, that your psychiatrist may
               | (not did have, may have) had patients with a condition
               | they didn't discuss with her, that only became known to
               | the patient after treatment had concluded. If you think a
               | minor claim like that requires "surveys" or data, believe
               | what you want, I don't know what to tell you.
               | 
               | The claim that my psychiatrist might have done something
               | or not isn't the claim I want data for. The claim I want
               | data for is "I'm also correct that many patients who have
               | gone off the drug to see if the sexual dysfunction stops
               | will probably no longer be making appointments with the
               | psychiatrist. What would be the point? If they want to
               | talk to someone that's what therapists are for."
               | 
               | That's not an anecdote, that's a pretty bold claim.
               | 
               | > The article this thread links to indicates there is no
               | cure, so any patient who has done research would know
               | discussing it with a psychiatrist would be useless.
               | 
               | I don't think people think about things that way
               | necessarily. I wouldn't read an article and conclude I
               | _shouldn 't_ talk to my doctor because the article
               | suggests the doctor can't help, because I don't
               | necessarily put that much faith in a single article. And
               | doctors will frequently _ask_ these sorts of questions,
               | so even if I had read the article, I don 't think I'd lie
               | about it to them.
               | 
               | In general, I think you are making a number of
               | assumptions about how people - doctors, insurers, pharma
               | companies, and patients - behave that aren't necessarily
               | borne out in reality. If your assumptions are all
               | correct, your conclusions are reasonable, but I am not
               | sure they're correct.
        
               | batrachos wrote:
               | > The insurance company doesn't know what you are
               | discussing in your sessions
               | 
               | That's not true. From what I understand, sessions are
               | coded e.g. "Intake" or "Meds check" when billed to
               | insurance. They know roughly what you're talking about.
               | 
               | > and isn't going to let you see or not see a specialist
               | just based on whether they prescribe you meds.
               | 
               | You can't bill a meds check with no meds.
               | 
               | > That's not how it works - or not how it should be
               | working if your insurer is acting appropriately. I also
               | saw this psychiatrist a couple of times before taking
               | anything. I didn't walk out of my first session with a
               | prescription for buspirone.
               | 
               | And those sessions were probably billed as "intake",
               | "evaluation" or the like. A psychiatrist cannot keep
               | billing intakes and evaluations forever. Talk therapy is
               | coded in its own way, and generally paid at a lower rate.
        
               | ivraatiems wrote:
               | > That's not true. From what I understand, sessions are
               | coded e.g. "Intake" or "Meds check" when billed to
               | insurance. They know roughly what you're talking about.
               | 
               | You are correct that CPT codes give some insight into
               | what was provided, but you are wrong about what codes
               | providers use in this case.
               | 
               | To check myself, I pulled my insurance provider's EOBs
               | for my last two visit to a psychiatrist and my last visit
               | to a psychotherapist. The codes were as follows:
               | 
               | Psychiatrist - CPT 99214 and 90833. Those are "office or
               | other outpatient visit for the evaluation and management
               | of an established patient, which requires at least two of
               | these three key components: a detailed history, a
               | detailed examination and medical decision making of
               | moderate complexity", and "Individual psychotherapy,
               | insight oriented, behavior modifying and/or supportive,
               | 30 minutes" respectively.
               | 
               | So I don't think from these you can assume "this person
               | was prescribed meds", necessarily. These are very similar
               | to a standard doctor's visit billing code, or a therapy
               | billing code (as below).
               | 
               | Psychologist - CPT 90837, which is "60 Minute Individual
               | Therapy"
               | 
               | Both of these EOBs indicate the insurance paid the
               | provider for the codes as billed. This is one example,
               | but I'd be surprised to find it wasn't representative
               | (that is, that my providers are not billing in generally
               | accepted ways).
               | 
               | > You can't bill a meds check with no meds.
               | 
               | As you can see above, there isn't necessarily such a
               | thing as a "meds check" CPT code. The codes don't give
               | the kind of information you're imagining.
               | 
               | > And those sessions were probably billed as "intake",
               | "evaluation" or the like. A psychiatrist cannot keep
               | billing intakes and evaluations forever. Talk therapy is
               | coded in its own way, and generally paid at a lower rate.
               | 
               | It is true talk therapy is a separate CPT code; it isn't
               | true that it's always paid at a lower rate. The
               | negotiated rate depends on the insurance company and
               | provider's agreement.
        
       | superflit2 wrote:
       | I will provide some AnecData.
       | 
       | I am from a generation that when SSRI became available, it was a
       | marvelous drug.
       | 
       | Prescribed to teenagers freely and plentiful.
       | 
       | Now on my peers of friends, we have many people who don't have
       | any libido.
       | 
       | The hardest-hit group was Women as they go to therapy more[1].
       | 
       | It is so huge we have Forums like "dead bedroom."
       | 
       | Once a friend that took SSRI told me how she felt about sex:
       | 
       | "I am looking forward to when my husband reaches his 40s, so he
       | does not bother me about sex anymore."
       | 
       | "Brushing my teeth is more useful and fun than sex."
       | 
       | I am not talking about sex partners that are not "competent" or
       | good. It is like you never felt hungry or willing to eat. But
       | then you *have* to eat, and when you are tasting the food, it is
       | like cardboard * every time*
       | 
       | The concerning part is that our PharmaCo does this every ten
       | years. (Thalidomide, SSRIs, etc.) So can we believe the mRNA
       | vacuum is really safe?
       | 
       | [1] - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5937254/#R27
        
         | iammisc wrote:
         | With women, birth control is the other obvious problem.
         | 
         | My wife took birth control for a day or two in her twenties
         | before we married, had the symptom, and threw the pills away.
         | 
         | It's very sad. Women's sex drives are as strong as men's, and
         | much stronger when ovulating.
        
       | taxyovio wrote:
       | I posted this here in hope more people would be aware of the long
       | term risks involved with SSRI, which are often not discussed from
       | the doctors. These symptoms might only appear after the
       | withdrawal.
       | 
       | Some manufacturers and healthcare organisations are being to
       | label this as a potential side effect. You can find a one line
       | warning on NHS website now.
       | 
       | People take the drug are usually desperate and at their most
       | vulnerable periods in life. It's very risky to make life-changing
       | decisions, more so without complete knowledge.
       | 
       | Doctors usually won't even listen to cases of PSSD by simply
       | attributing the SD as remission of depression. But there're some
       | recent studies on how SSRI could change neutral receptors in a
       | non-reversible way, which could be the potential mechanism.
        
       | GoHydra wrote:
       | Glad to see this finally getting attention. This is not what
       | teenagers have in mind when they ask for "help".
        
       | jonotime wrote:
       | I did not realize even the short term affects where that
       | prevalent. Terrified of the long term ones now. It definitely
       | happened to me on citalopram. And now on escitalipram. I have
       | been experimenting with adding DHEA and ginseng from my doc and I
       | think its helping a bit.
        
       | a0-prw wrote:
       | You shouldn't take _any_ form of medication unless it 's
       | necessary to save your life. Period. Doctors are still mostly
       | quacks, except in some exceptional circumstances
        
       | Madmallard wrote:
       | I wonder when we're going to find out better ways to alter the
       | body without causing deleterious entropy. Surely pills and shots
       | are not a solution for everything and are only present because of
       | their easy testability. We need better methods and aggressive
       | creative problem solving and the funding to incentive it.
        
       | theawesomekhan wrote:
       | Seems I'm geo-blocked. My Location is Turkey.
        
         | chinathrow wrote:
         | https://archive.md/wip/rG5st
        
         | ainar-g wrote:
         | Same in Russia. Archive:
         | 
         | https://web.archive.org/web/20210911150504/https://rxisk.org...
        
       | mattowen_uk wrote:
       | My personal anecdote: I'm on Venlafaxine which is an SNRI (also
       | cited in the article), and I definitely suffer some of those
       | side-effects. It sucks. At times it makes me want to shy away
       | from sex completely. Other times I think I'm doing OK, only to
       | find out I can't finish, or I finish weakly with no adrenalin
       | rush.
       | 
       | So my choices are, come off the pills, and emotionally go down a
       | dark well I may not come out of, or keep taking the pills and
       | live with sexual dysfunction. So not a choice at all really.
       | 
       | Thankfully I have an understanding partner, who has seen me at my
       | emotional worst and has no desire for that to happen again, so we
       | work around the issues and find new ways to enjoy each other. I
       | think it also helps that I'm staring down the barrel of my 50th
       | birthday, so it's not like I'm a youngster who would have
       | uncontrollable desires anyway ;)
       | 
       | As you probably worked out, I'm fairly open about this, and will
       | tell anyone who asks, as I believe it's an important issue that
       | people should be aware of.
        
         | thrownaway561 wrote:
         | this... when it comes to sex, we all need to have an
         | understanding partner. you are very lucky to have such a person
         | in your life.
        
         | coolreader18 wrote:
         | Hey I'm also on venlafaxine! It's worked very well for me as
         | well, though I don't think I can really speak to the topic of
         | the OP since I started taking it when I was relatively young. I
         | haven't noticed.. much? I guess?
        
         | hvs wrote:
         | I had the same problem with Venlafaxine (Effexor XR). My
         | psychiatrist had me switch to Duloxetine (Cymbalta) and my
         | problems went away (but it worked as well as Venlafaxine for
         | GAD and depression). FWIW I'm in my mid-40's but I had this
         | problem about 10 years ago (when I switched).
        
           | mattowen_uk wrote:
           | I'm taking Venlafaxine also for GAD and depression. I think I
           | will talk to my doctor & psychiatrist about Duloxetine at my
           | next check-in. Thanks for the heads-up!
        
         | tata71 wrote:
         | Is this the only drug/treatment you've attempted to combat the
         | dark well with?
         | 
         | This is not medical advice, only anecdotal interest, but, have
         | known many to leave SSRI for well-timed CBD oil.
         | 
         | Wonder if issues requiring an SNRI are "similar" enough?
         | 
         | Wishing you well!
        
           | diskzero wrote:
           | Not the poster, but exercise and diet really helps with my
           | side effects. Sometimes I think about tapering off or trying
           | some other drug, but then I get scared. I don't want to go
           | back into the tunnel of depression.
        
         | ddorian43 wrote:
         | Are you overweight & do you exercise ? What are your test &
         | free-test levels ? Did you try any other meds ? Maybe you don't
         | hit the side effects bingo on other similar meds.
        
         | diskzero wrote:
         | I am in a similar situation to mattowen_uk. Venlafaxine has
         | been the best for me and I was eventually able to work through
         | the side effects. Communication with your partner is key and if
         | I find I can't reach orgasm, I can pay more attention to her.
         | In some ways, it has been a very good thing, allowing me to be
         | open and honest in the bedroom and out.
         | 
         | I too am older, so I totally understand how sexual side effects
         | could be brutal for someone younger and in the active dating
         | scene. If this is you, please know you are not alone.
         | Depression is a literal killer. With a bit of work tuning the
         | amount and type of medication, things will get better.
        
           | mattowen_uk wrote:
           | Well said, that man. :)
        
         | bradydjohnson wrote:
         | Vortioxetine is associated with fewer sexual side effects, and
         | it works for me!
        
       | n8cpdx wrote:
       | As someone dating in their 20s, it is getting hard to find people
       | who aren't having SSRI-related dysfunction. Recently met an older
       | (early 30s guy) and it was seriously cool having a sexual
       | experience that didn't end with "don't bother I'm just not going
       | to finish no matter how long we go." They really seem to be
       | handing out these serious, almost-impossible-to-withdraw
       | medications like candy on Halloween.
       | 
       | They don't actually solve the problem long term, you can't really
       | come off them ever (I know a lot of people who have tried; only
       | one who succeeded and they were on an exceedingly low dose to
       | begin with - it took six months before the frightening
       | neurological symptoms subsided), and they permanently damage
       | ability to have human connection (I don't understand how that
       | doesn't worsen depression and anxiety long term).
       | 
       | I get that I'm the asshole for suggesting that people take a
       | second look at the side effect profile and consider whether these
       | might be overprescribed. I get that they do make life better
       | overall for some people. I've also seen my friends become
       | psychotic and ruin their lives when they try to get off them
       | (because the sexual side effects and weight gain were
       | unbearable). So IDK, it feels urgent enough to raise as a
       | concern. Especially when so many people are taking them.
       | 
       | I see a lot of people given SSRIs for anxiety that could probably
       | be better treated by e.g. not smoking so much weed. It is hard to
       | manage the underlying factors that drive people to alcohol and
       | drug use, but I think probably easier than being rendered
       | impotent by SSRIs.
       | 
       | I get that seemingly everyone is depressed these days, but I
       | really question giving SSRIs, which have poor efficacy and
       | devastating side effects, before demanding lifestyle change.
       | Walking 10k steps and CBT are useful interventions that can be
       | easily monitored by physicians with modern technology.
       | 
       | I guess good for half the 20-something cohort for not being able
       | to orgasm really ever, but it's not great for building the
       | physical aspect of human connection, which I maintain is
       | important. IDK what society looks like when half the prime age
       | population isn't able to have a fulfilling or enjoyable sex life.
        
         | FFRefresh wrote:
         | I do wonder if there's a culture-wide bug/meme with regards to
         | mental health (and beyond) that makes it hard to push for
         | lifestyle changes at scale.
         | 
         | I think one such meme is around agency, with the underlying
         | meme being that humans have no control over their circumstances
         | or mental state. They _have_ anxiety or they _have_ depression.
         | It 's part of their identity, and these seem to be thought of
         | as immutable diseases.
         | 
         | And it's a social faux pas to suggest to someone with anxiety
         | (particularly someone you are not super close with) that if
         | _they_ altered their behavior and consciously tried to work on
         | their thought patterns, that they could get better. In our
         | culture now, that gets translated as  'blaming the victim',
         | because with a victim mindset, such a suggestion implies that
         | it's the fault of the person.
         | 
         | It's an unfortunate state of affairs. It feels like we are
         | increasingly leaning into concepts such as an 'external locus
         | of control' and 'learned helplessness' as a society. I don't
         | know how we can push back on these ideas at scale, but if we
         | don't, it's hard not seeing mental health issues and the
         | externalities of the easy pharmacological solutions expand.
        
           | iammisc wrote:
           | You're absolutely right. This is an unpopular opinion, but I
           | don't think anxiety or depression are mental illness. They
           | are just feelings. Your feelings do not make you ill...
           | People attribute it to a 'chemical' imbalance, but your brain
           | being run by chemical fluctuations, everything is a
           | 'chemical' balance, including this comment I'm typing right
           | now. What we've done is taken these brain fluctuations, and
           | labeled them bad, without addressing why one's brain is
           | thinking this.
           | 
           | I am an anxious person. I have had several terrible things
           | happen to me that have led to prolonged periods of
           | depression. Ultimately, these things are a choice, and people
           | need to be taught good skills for coping with the sad
           | realities of life. Life is ultimately a long series of
           | sufferings, ending in death, which one can either choose to
           | embrace or to worry about. Unfortunately, as a society we
           | have stopped teaching all the traditional tools one would use
           | to get oneself out of such funks.
        
             | vettedvat wrote:
             | You're describing situational depression. Very different
             | than major depressive disorder or dysthymia for which these
             | drugs are often prescribed. Common mistake.
        
               | iammisc wrote:
               | 'Major depressive disorder' is just situational
               | depression applied to every situation. Common mistake.
               | Many psychiatrists and psychologists make the same
               | mistake. Many psychiatrists, by virtue of their
               | education, are part of a class of people who are
               | themselves more prone to depression and anxiety, so we
               | probably shouldn't be looking to them for great advice.
        
               | vettedvat wrote:
               | Wrong again, a psychologist would not make that mistake.
               | They know what those words mean; you just googled them.
               | Luckily you didn't even try explain away dysthymia from
               | your armchair because, well, you have nothing to stand
               | on.
               | 
               | > Many psychiatrists, by virtue of their education, are
               | part of a class of people who are themselves more prone
               | to depression and anxiety
               | 
               | Yikes, now we're just on to blind speculation.
        
               | iammisc wrote:
               | > Yikes, now we're just on to blind speculation.
               | 
               | Not at all. More educated people tend to be more anxious
               | and more depressed.
               | 
               | https://www.originsrecovery.com/wp-
               | content/uploads/2020/10/H...
               | 
               | The fact that we trust those more prone to depression to
               | solve depression should not be discounted.
               | 
               | When it comes to 'dysthymia'. The only reason we find it
               | to be a disease is that we expect people to be happy all
               | the time. We've labeled anything other than that as
               | diseased. As I stated elsewhere, I do not believe in
               | happiness. Most of my day is spent neither sad nor happy.
               | Were I to be sad all the time, I don't think that's
               | particularly interesting either. Our society is not set
               | up with space for people to not be happy. Society is ill,
               | not the people.
        
               | vettedvat wrote:
               | Your study says that some of 3715 mensa members were
               | depressed. Not that "many psychiatrists, by virtue of
               | their education, are part of a class of people who are
               | themselves more prone to depression and anxiety." So
               | yeah, blind speculation.
               | 
               | > When it comes to 'dysthymia'. The only reason we find
               | it to be a disease is that we expect people to be happy
               | all the time.
               | 
               | Completely wrong, again. You can experience situational
               | depression without having dysthymia. You just don't know
               | what these words mean.
        
             | ghostbrainalpha wrote:
             | What are the traditional tools we can use to get ourselves
             | out of depression? Exercise probably?
        
               | iammisc wrote:
               | Community, shared culture, shared religion. Exercise
               | happens when you do those three things.
        
               | vettedvat wrote:
               | All 3 are in abundance in Ethiopia. So why are depressive
               | disorders so prevalent there? Folksy phrases aren't a
               | great guide to mental health.
        
               | iammisc wrote:
               | > So why are depressive disorders so prevalent there
               | 
               | Because there's no such thing as 'depressive disorder'.
               | We expect people to be happy, and when they're not, we
               | call them diseased. Nothing is wrong with them.
               | 
               | Also, Ethiopia is in the midst of a civil war isn't it?
        
               | vettedvat wrote:
               | False, we expect people to be depressed when depressing
               | things happen, this is normal and called "situational
               | depression," you've confused it with a disorder.
               | 
               | Depression has been a problem in Ethiopia for much longer
               | than the conflict in Tigray, despite the abundance of
               | "community, shared culture, shared religion." Looks like
               | it takes more than that...
        
               | mtalantikite wrote:
               | Buddhism has been working on this for a couple thousand
               | or so years. There are many different practices and
               | traditions that have evolved in it, but many of them at
               | the beginning will teach you to sit and observe all sorts
               | of phenomena, or may even ask you to bring up
               | uncomfortable, strong emotions to learn how to work with
               | them.
               | 
               | And yeah, for sure exercise. Just remember the practice
               | of training your body is a marathon, not a sprint.
               | Consistent effort over years is what you're going for
               | rather than trying to go hard at the beginning. It's a
               | lifestyle change.
        
           | retrac wrote:
           | > And it's a social faux pas to suggest to someone with
           | anxiety (particularly someone you are not super close with)
           | that if they altered their behavior and consciously tried to
           | work on their thought patterns, that they could get better.
           | 
           | We seem more attuned to emotional distress. And illnesses
           | like anxiety present as acute distress, usually. We naturally
           | want to assuage the person. And a person with anxiety
           | naturally learns all sorts of avoidant coping mechanisms.
           | 
           | We seem to have entered some sort of negative feedback cycle
           | there. Medications do help some, but it goes best with
           | therapy, and the mainstay is basically exposure therapy. Face
           | your fears, and struggle through something uncomfortable,
           | until you learn to tolerate it. People should be gently
           | nudged in that direction, not encouraged to lean into their
           | withdrawal from the negative triggers.
        
           | kodah wrote:
           | I was on SSRIs for a time until my thoughts became so
           | irreversibly cloudy that I weened off and stopped. After that
           | I coincidentally stopped drinking, my weight dropped, and now
           | I've stopped using weed for the most part. My anxiety doesn't
           | go away, even if I go ride my bike for hours.
           | 
           | The things that give me anxiety are largely social. How
           | people think of me at work, my appearance, what women think
           | of me, and how they perceive how I act. The only thing that
           | helps is shutting these thoughts down with CBT. I've dubbed
           | this my, "Nobody cares Mother Fucker(tm)" routine.
           | 
           | I've noticed relying on my friends to vent just sours
           | relationships. As much as people gloat about support systems,
           | it's mainly a farce. People will only tolerate hearing so
           | much of your internal dissonance, concerns, and stressors.
           | People want to enjoy you, for the most part. Maybe a partner
           | will be there for you, but not likely in my experience
           | (though, I'm unmarried, so take what I say with a grain of
           | salt.)
        
           | gbjw wrote:
           | Cf. 'The Myth of Mental Illness' by Thomas Szasz (1961):
           | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Myth_of_Mental_Illness
        
         | LorenPechtel wrote:
         | The doctors don't seem to care about the side effects. All the
         | psych drugs have horrendous side effects which get basically
         | ignored. I've even seen multiple suggestions that mass
         | shootings might be a rare side effect from them.
        
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