[HN Gopher] Which jobs most often pair together among married co...
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Which jobs most often pair together among married couples
Author : thrower123
Score : 137 points
Date : 2021-10-26 18:11 UTC (4 hours ago)
(HTM) web link (flowingdata.com)
(TXT) w3m dump (flowingdata.com)
| Kkoala wrote:
| There was some really similar research done in Finland, and they
| concluded that many of the correlations were because students of
| certain fields used to go to the same parties / events.
|
| E.g. Computer Science students had a lot of parties with nurses,
| and this then caused a correlation in marriages between those
| groups as well
| robocat wrote:
| Some jobs have very skewed gender ratios: so Early childhood
| teachers don't marry other Early childhood teachers, and
| relatively few Police officers marry other Police officers.
|
| I would expect people with working class jobs as far more likely
| to marry other working class people, and respectively for
| professional jobs. Hard to see from this - needs some sort of
| cluster analysis.
| llimos wrote:
| When I was at university, Engineering and Psychology used to have
| parties together. But that might also have been because
| Engineering was 80% men and Psychology 80% women.
| TMWNN wrote:
| I'm told that Milwaukee School of Engineering began a nursing
| program to even out the male-female ratio. <https://np.reddit.c
| om/r/todayilearned/comments/6onyh6/til_th...>
| toast0 wrote:
| I gradumated from there... This is like the first time seeing
| its name here.
|
| I'm not sure I saw any nursing students while there. All of
| the students I knew were in the engineering program, or had
| started there and moved to the business program (often as an
| intermediate step before dropping out)
|
| Biomedical engineering seemed to have the least skewed ratio
| when I attended... But it's also really fing hard.
| coder-3 wrote:
| One thing to remember when interpreting those stats is the
| popularity of a profession in general. Elementary and middle
| school teachers come up a lot because either there's a huge
| number of them or they disproportionately responded to the
| survey.
| [deleted]
| krysp wrote:
| A few interesting ones in there, such as Dentists, who other than
| other dentists, most often marry secretaries and assistants.
| sdenton4 wrote:
| Software developers often marry other software developers, and
| computer programmers often marry computer programmers, but it is
| apparently rare for a software developer to marry a computer
| programmer.
|
| (Also, apparently mathematician isn't a real job.)
| mensetmanusman wrote:
| This will be kind of skewed towards the wealthy, as marriages are
| becoming less obtainable by the lower classes.
| jlawson wrote:
| Did the price of marriage paperwork go up or something?
|
| How can a marriage be "less obtainable"?
| wanderingmind wrote:
| There is a difference between wedding and marriage. A wedding
| paperwork is not too expensive, but a marriage has truly
| become unaffordable.
| micromacrofoot wrote:
| I have no idea what this means. Are you talking about the
| societal standards of what marriage is? something else?
|
| There were 4 people at my wedding. It was only marginally
| more expensive than the paperwork.
| barry-cotter wrote:
| You know the big fancy wedding for 50-300 people in a
| hotel? That's expensive. I forget the sociological
| terminology but getting married has gone from a "We're
| getting started" to a "We have arrived" statement and the
| wedding is meant to show that, which is expensive.
| micromacrofoot wrote:
| Well sure, but that's just one example of how corporate
| interests tend to push tradition into being as expensive
| as possible (holidays face a similar fate). They're
| creating social pressure to solidify their revenue.
|
| A wedding can be whatever you want. It's not
| "unobtainable" unless you're treating it like a class-
| based measuring stick.
| lowkey_ wrote:
| Marriage licenses are like $100 -- are you confusing
| wedding and marriage in this? (i.e. it should be that
| marriage paperwork is not too expensive, but a wedding is
| unaffordable)
| foxbarrington wrote:
| What is expensive about marriage? I'm trying to think of
| reasons. Taxes? It can be advantageous to stay single, but
| I wouldn't say this is that big. Kids? Another mouth to
| feed and educate is wildly expensive, but I doubt this is
| what we're talking about. Rent/buying a home? Cheaper to
| share a space I'd think. I think I'm missing something.
| monocasa wrote:
| At least on the income tax side too, you're allowed to
| file seperately even if you're married.
| sparrish wrote:
| How has marriage become unaffordable? In what way? I'm
| really asking.
|
| Seems to me two people with two incomes living in a 1
| bedroom apartment is cheaper than one.
|
| Nearly everything is cheaper when you're married:
| Insurance, taxes, meals, utilities.
|
| What's less expensive as a single?
| mensetmanusman wrote:
| Well, consider, about 50 years ago almost every child was
| raised by married parents, today about half are.
|
| Having so many people with no lived experience means
| lower cultural forces behind asking them to participate
| in an expensive party, even though marriage is so good
| for raising children (which used to be the purpose of
| marriage).
| whimsicalism wrote:
| I don't understand what you are trying to say.
|
| Lived experience? Explain.
| mensetmanusman wrote:
| If most couples you know are just cohabitating, the
| cultural forces to have a public ceremony decrease.
| emidln wrote:
| Why is an expensive party important? You can certainly
| get married at a Church or at a courthouse for pretty
| cheap and a party isn't required, but even if it is, you
| can throw a decent party without thousands of dollars
| spent. I've been to many of them in small towns across
| the Midwest.
| mensetmanusman wrote:
| If you are already cohabitating, marriage is an expense
| you can indefinitely procrastinate.
|
| Especially if you see what others are doing on social
| media, your mental model of the expense continues to
| inflate and the pressure to procrastinate grows.
| peanut_worm wrote:
| How so? There isn't much paperwork and you will save on taxes.
| neogodless wrote:
| > you will save on taxes
|
| ... if you pair a high earner with a low/no earner
| monocasa wrote:
| You'll never do worse than when you were single since you
| can always file seperately.
| downut wrote:
| I have not looked at filing separately for many years,
| but I ran the numbers back then and the result was the
| same.
| downut wrote:
| This is correct. When I was still in grad school and the
| better half was working as an engineer I pretty much got
| the ultimatum that we needed to get married for the tax
| break. We had been living together for 7 years.
|
| But then we were both working and living in SF as engineers
| and I did my taxes on my own for the first time about 3
| years in from graduate school. I was shocked that the
| penalty for being married vs. not was $3000. I immediately
| turned to my wife, and said, "split, and split the
| difference?". (She understood that I was joking.) And
| _then_ I discovered that you can 't fix it that way, you
| still get taxed at the same rate. Or did. That was 30 years
| ago. (We're still married, humor is important.)
|
| But after that while working at Sandia I had a PhD friend
| getting married to another fresh PhD, and I did tell him,
| do take a look at the tax hit.
| monocasa wrote:
| They changed the bracket differences for single, married
| filing jointly, and married filing seperately back in
| 2018. Married filing seperately is basically the same as
| being single these days.
| lowkey_ wrote:
| Marriage is actually a great financial choice for most people.
| If marriage rates are dropping, I'd blame our culture -- the
| financial incentives are clearly there.
| munk-a wrote:
| Young people get pretty bombarded by divorce horror stories -
| especially from pop culture. Most divorces don't go to a
| court and a large number are resolved entirely internally and
| only seek professional help for the finalization of the
| agreement... but there are the attention grabbing headlines
| of someone being left with only the shirt on his back (and
| like 20 mil in options) on the far side of a really bad
| divorce.
|
| I also think that culture does play a fair role. I was
| initially hesitant to marry (as a millennial) because a lot
| of my friends were being denied the ability to marry who they
| chose, so I wanted to stand with them and reject the
| institution. That, thankfully, has been resolved - but I can
| totally understand people who have mixed feelings on
| marriage.
| lazide wrote:
| Only if you manage to avoid the often catastrophic downside
| risks, which are very apparent and very frequent in many
| industries. It's quite straightforward and convenient (in
| that there is an entire industry in family law serving it) to
| completely destroy decades of earnings and often times
| decades of future earnings for one or both parties.
|
| Have seen it happen, and literally half of the couples in the
| 'good part of town' where I used to live which was populated
| almost exclusively by well educated white collar
| professionals were either going through it/at some stage of
| it, or were in a clearly abusive situation that might even
| have benefited from doing it - as long as they didn't wait
| for the other party to really screw them over by pulling the
| trigger first and alleging abuse or whatever.
|
| A friends neighbor had been on the receiving end (along with
| their daughter) of literally years of verbal and emotional
| abuse from the wife for no apparent reason. She would go
| after neighbors too, if they dared to exist in her presence.
|
| Both of them were lawyers. Last time I was over there a month
| ago, after an hour of it, he just begged her to stop
| screaming in the most pitiful voice I've heard a man ever
| use. So she yelled at him more for being so pitiful.
|
| It's hard to really understand how terrible a prior trusted
| loved one can be until you've been on the other end of it.
| It's easy to assume it's because the other party did
| something wrong to deserve it too - but that is not usually
| the case in my experience. It's often lack of emotional
| regulation/healthy outlets for stress or life problems,
| usually reinforced by denial from the abuser.
|
| The abusee often can't figure out how to escape or feels held
| hostage, sometimes also by denial at their own problems or
| inability to cope that lead them to that state of insecurity.
|
| While marriage (the legal process) can magnify the upside, it
| can also dramatically magnify the downsides too, and make it
| MUCH MUCH harder to escape a bad situation for everyone.
|
| It's quite a shit sandwich. Always has been near as I can
| tell.
| tiborsaas wrote:
| It's a shame to marry because of financial incentives.
| 988747 wrote:
| A theory I once read goes like this: in the past it was quite
| common for lawyers, directors, managers to marry their
| secretaries, which was the way for them to jump to higher
| social class. Now, a director making advances towards their
| secretary faces immediate sexual harassment lawsuit, so they
| choose to marry other managers/directors instead.
| bduerst wrote:
| Is that really a bad thing though?
|
| For the 1/10 times at work where the person in power ends up
| having a meaningful relationship with an underling that you
| lose, you also have the 9/10 cases of sexual harassment that
| you lose too.
| TMWNN wrote:
| Yes, I've wondered the same thing. Anti-sexual harassment
| training, and more broadly the discouraging of socialization
| between men and women, has also reduced the opportunity for
| men and women to marry. The flip side of the male executive
| no longer being able to chase his secretary around a desk to
| try to pinch her on the butt is another executive not being
| able to politely court the secretary he is in love with (and
| vice versa).
|
| I don't have a good answer for how to get the one without the
| other, but both are consequences of modern sensibilities.
| rsj_hn wrote:
| More and more, I'm beginning to think that a society in
| which there is widespread use of birth control and in which
| the majority of women enter the labor force and work full
| time in an office is not going to be able to maintain
| replacement level fertility rates.
|
| In which case, the future belongs to societies where women
| don't work and birth control is stigmatized.
|
| It could be that there is a reason why the world was
| dominated by large patriarchal societies other than some
| sort of accident of history.
|
| If that's true, then a society with lots of gig jobs or
| work at home jobs might help alleviate the problem. There
| could be other creative solutions, like reimagining higher
| education to give people time to marry and have kids before
| college. Other approaches are also possible. Whatever the
| reason, the secular societies will need to scramble if they
| don't want the world of the future to be dominated by
| orthodox religious populations.
| monocasa wrote:
| Eh, Rome had widespread use of abortifacients, only
| falling after they had harvested those plants into
| extinction.
| rsj_hn wrote:
| Do you have some data on how widespread and effective it
| was? Perhaps this also contributed to Rome's population
| problems - it needed to rely on the provinces to supply
| labor and manpower for a substantial portion of the
| Empire, and eventually the capital was moved away from
| Rome entirely. Constantinople was also basically empty by
| the time it was conquered, having a population of only
| 50,000 people when the Turks arrived, from a high of one
| million.
|
| But I think in such ancient societies, the struggle is a
| little different. E.g. when you are being ravaged by wars
| and plagues, you need more than replacement level
| fertility. You need huge fertility that can recover
| massive population loss in a short period of time. After
| Hannibal decimated the population of Italy, Rome
| recovered remarkably quickly. They just made more Romans.
| Later on, that stopped working and they needed manpower
| from the provinces.
|
| In modern societies, we've licked most of the other stuff
| and so can keep going much longer as fertility declines,
| to the point where we start noticing only when rates hit
| below replacement. Traditional societies would see
| population loss long before fertility rates fell below
| replacement.
| TMWNN wrote:
| >There could be other creative solutions, like
| reimagining higher education to give people time to marry
| and have kids before college.
|
| This is essentially the advice of the "Princeton Mom":
| Find and marry your spouse in college.
| <https://www.today.com/popculture/marry-smart-princeton-
| mom-s...>
| xhevahir wrote:
| I'd be interested to see a historical comparison. Supposedly the
| (male)doctor-marries-(female)nurse pattern of several decades ago
| --or the executive/secretary one, to give another example--has
| given way to a situation where Americans tend to marry within
| their own profession/class.
| Rebelgecko wrote:
| I think the # of female doctors has grown much more quickly
| than the # of male nurses (IIRC most medical students are women
| now). It would be interesting to compare stats by gender- does
| a male software engineer marry differently than a female one?
| sgerenser wrote:
| Yep, I can say with almost 100% certainty there's a big
| difference between male and female dating preferences even
| within the same occupation. For all the talk of feminism and
| empowerment, women in high status fields like law and
| medicine are Much less likely to "marry down" to a man in a
| lower status field than the other way around.
| thrower123 wrote:
| If you look at some of the trades and more artisinal
| professions (plumber, electrician, hvac, welding, jeweler for
| some examples), the top matches are often things like "non-
| medical secretary", book-keeping and accounting, office
| managers, retail supervisors, etc.
|
| That suggests to me that there's still a lot of cases where
| they've got their spouse running the office or the business end
| of a small business. That was almost a stereotypical
| arrangement for couples of my parents' generation.
| genericuser314 wrote:
| Type in "Other agricultural workers" and then compare the result
| to other professions.
| Enginerrrd wrote:
| I'm not sure quite what you're getting at. Can you elaborate?
| jmknoll wrote:
| Might be a mobile display bug, but the match% between "other
| ag workers" and themselves is greater than highest value of
| the bottom axis
| MattGaiser wrote:
| Can see it on laptop too.
| [deleted]
| lostcolony wrote:
| So it overflows the chart on desktop Firefox for me, but,
| the buttom axis caps out on the right at 22%. It looks like
| they hardcoded the graph axis, and so since other
| agricultural workers are at 23%, it overflows.
| jmknoll wrote:
| Good catch. I didn't see the bottom axis. Edited my
| comment accordingly.
| lostcolony wrote:
| On that note, bottom axis is usually x, not y. Dunno if
| it displays differently on mobile; on desktop the bars
| run horizontally; y-axis is profession, x-axis is
| percentage.
| davio wrote:
| It's slightly more than Physicians
| clircle wrote:
| Unfortunately, the statistician or data scientist that put this
| visualization together neglected to include statisticians and
| data scientists in the list of searchable jobs.
| lotsofpulp wrote:
| I would be interested in seeing this data by age so we can see
| any changes in the past few decades. Perhaps profession on
| marriage date. I do not expect there to be decent data
| available for this though.
| alexfrydl wrote:
| I bet the results were too embarrassing.
| peruvian wrote:
| Not surprised by lawyer. Only other lawyers can understand the
| long hours and stress.
| munk-a wrote:
| There's also some joke in there about the only person able to
| write a contract to successfully bind a lawyer to a long term
| commitment being another lawyer.
| screye wrote:
| Many anecdotal guesses are validated by this data. Doctors and
| agricultural workers are the obvious standouts, but I see a few
| more too.
|
| Us programmers stick together. Quite a high rate of marrying
| within the community. Lawyers show a similarly high number.
|
| A criticism of the study, is that it does not normalize by how
| many of these professions are in the general population. So, it
| appears as though software analysts don't like intermarrying.
| However, the truth is that there simply aren't enough of them
| around, they are simply more likely to run into software
| engineers, so that's whom they marry most.
|
| IE. This study captures P(running into a profession) x
| P(preference for that profession). I would love to them model
| P(running into a profession), so that we could get the much
| juicer preferences of each group for various professions.
| beerandt wrote:
| Except many couples meet in school, where they'd be exposed to
| a disproportionate number of potential spouses within their own
| field of study, and maybe to a lesser extent others in related
| programs within the same college.
|
| Which would also be skewed by things like length of study and
| personality types attracted to particular interests.
|
| Eg, Doctors and lawyers often don't want to get married until
| after school, at which point they've primarily been around
| other doctors and lawyers for the previous 3-7 years.
| chiph wrote:
| We had one woman in my graduating comp-sci class. _One._ And
| she had been dating someone seriously for a few years.
|
| We guys had better luck dating Early Childhood Education
| majors, which is supported by their chart.
| bumby wrote:
| I've read that one reason wealth inequality is worse today is
| because high-education-high-income individuals want to marry
| other HEHI individuals whereas in the past this wasn't the
| case. If the claim about the past is true, it seems to
| undermine your point
| eCa wrote:
| It wasn't that long ago (at least over here in Europe) that
| very few women[1] made it to anything High Income, so such
| couplings were rarer.
|
| [1] Relatively speaking
| beerandt wrote:
| Why? In the past (pre 1960s/70s/80s) spouses largely didn't
| meet in college/university level education or at the
| workplace, or if they did, it wasn't as peers.
|
| But my point isn't so much that people meet in college, so
| much as there isn't really a good way to adjust statistical
| measurements to account for the popularity of a particular
| field/job, as was suggested up thread.
|
| There are way too many related, interdependent, conflicting
| variables, with common field of study being a major one,
| even for the smaller disciplines.
| 908B64B197 wrote:
| > Doctors and agricultural workers are the obvious standouts
|
| Doctor is one of the few profession that's available in the
| countryside, where 90% of the jobs will be in the agricultural
| sector.
|
| > So, it appears as though software analysts don't like
| intermarrying. However, the truth is that there simply aren't
| enough of them around, they are simply more likely to run into
| software engineers, so that's whom they marry most.
|
| They also broke down Software Engineers into a few different
| professional tittles. Computer Analyst Specialist sounds
| very... East Coast 90's.
| bumby wrote:
| The data shows physicians predominantly marry other
| physicians and ag workers tend to marry other ag workers. Not
| that physicians and agricultural workers inter-marry
| chrisseaton wrote:
| > it appears as though software analysts don't like
| intermarrying
|
| What happened to 'software analysts'? Is that even a career
| today? Sounds like something straight out of the 80s. Is it a
| 'product owner'?
|
| But the real explanation is that realistically 90% of people
| meet their spouses in university.
| kens wrote:
| On the topic of analysts, I've been wondering for a long time
| about "systems analyst" which used to be the cool job in
| computing in the 1980s but then essentially vanished. I was
| never quite sure what systems analysts did.
|
| Getting back to the data visualization, a lot of it seems to
| be that male-dominated jobs pair with female-dominated jobs,
| which isn't particularly surprising.
| asdff wrote:
| According to FB only 28% of married couples meet in college.
| chrisseaton wrote:
| So that's still probably a vast majority of people with the
| predicate of people who went a university at all?
| smnrchrds wrote:
| You have to be a 'Computer Systems Analyst' to be eligible
| for TN status.
| ZephyrBlu wrote:
| > _But the real explanation is that realistically 90% of
| people meet their spouses in university_
|
| This is very exaggerated. It seems like people who find their
| partner in university are in the minority these days.
| chrisseaton wrote:
| Is that the case? I guess my university experience is 10
| years out of date but that's how it was back then.
| dmurray wrote:
| > This study captures P(running into a profession) x
| P(preference for that profession). I would love to them model
| P(running into a profession), so that we could get the much
| juicer preferences of each group for various professions.
|
| The page links to a different visualization of the same data,
| [0] which attempts to control for the prevalence of a job
| within the population.
|
| Maybe it doesn't go far enough for you but that's a pretty big
| first step in that model.
|
| [0] https://flowingdata.com/2017/08/28/occupation-matchmaker/
| PaulDavisThe1st wrote:
| > Us programmers stick together. Quite a high rate of marrying
| within the community.
|
| nobody else would take our schtick ...
| burkaman wrote:
| Why are chief executives and legislators grouped together as one
| profession?
| hanniabu wrote:
| Revolving doors
| cwkoss wrote:
| Would be nice if you could click the result professions to pivot
| to that as the focused profession
| Unbeliever69 wrote:
| It is extremely rare for musicians to marry outside of their
| field. Particularly professional musicians.
| cromka wrote:
| I like that Clergy was high on that list, too. Must be church
| musicians marrying pastors?
| syntaxing wrote:
| Kinda interesting that almost all type engineers have elementary
| and middle school teachers and registered nurse in the top 3
| groups.
| [deleted]
| maerF0x0 wrote:
| So tldr;
|
| Everyone marries Elementary and Middle School teachers, even that
| group intermarrying.
|
| Now i know who to swipe on in the dating apps :)
| kerng wrote:
| Looks like elementary teachers are the ones paired with everyone
| the most, even with themselves. Not sure, looks to me like the
| data might be off
| bryanrasmussen wrote:
| I would be interested in seeing which jobs often pair together
| among divorcing couples.
| andrewclunn wrote:
| My guess is unemployed will be overrepresented for men on that
| one. Also military service.
| bedobi wrote:
| I'm a software developer.
|
| I don't know about the rest of the community but for me someone
| being in tech is, if not a disqualifier, something very close to
| it.
|
| I have no real reason or justification! I guess maybe I'm just
| techy enough as is and prefer other qualities in a partner.
| blackoil wrote:
| Plus we have so many additional risks of confrontation. Space
| vs Tabs, Vim vs Emacs, Deb vs Rpm...
| NikolaNovak wrote:
| I once dated a lovely beautiful nerdy funny intelligent
| successful software engineer.
|
| Our first five dates were awesome. So much agreement and joy
| and commonality. Instant connection and camaraderie.
|
| Further on we realized we didn't bring enough to relationship.
| We didn't want the"gender I'm attracted version of myself". We
| each wanted somebody to bring new perspectives, challenge us in
| ways that work and nerdy friends don't, to talk about not work
| after work, or at least _different_ work, etc. Ultimately even
| somebody to disagree with us.
|
| After a few similar experiences, it's not that I ever actively
| avoided a software engineer partner, it's just that they never
| seemed to last long. Love of my life is English major with
| career in retail and home depot / Canadian tire store manager.
| She brings softer , more emotionally intelligent, people
| oriented side to our family. I'm the annoying pedantic literal
| obsessive nerdy one :-D. Works well!
|
| Edit : All of my close developer friends are similarly married
| to arts major types. Interestingly, I now realize, great many
| of my _acquaintance_ developer friends have nerdy or techu
| partners. Wonder what variables are at place but definitely to
| each their own!
| InitialLastName wrote:
| I'm in the same boat; my household is certainly much more
| resilient and effective with a technically-focused, detail-
| oriented engineer and an emotionally intelligent human-
| oriented teacher in it than it would be with two of me (we
| certainly have better relationships with our neighbors and
| community this way, at the very least).
| leetcrew wrote:
| I had a similar experience dating someone in the field,
| though it went on a bit longer. for me it was just kinda
| rough to come home from a day of working on software to talk
| to my SO about their problems with software. great person,
| but it was an exhausting relationship.
|
| on the other hand, most of my friends also do software stuff
| and we enjoy complaining to each other about work. I guess
| maybe the difference is you can say "not now" to a friend
| more easily than a partner.
| dboreham wrote:
| Could be something to do with a tech-literate person is
| _more_ valuable to an arts person than to another tech
| person. E.g. arts person wants their small plumbing jobs
| done, their offspring taught math properly, and so on, but
| other tech person doesn't need that because they do those
| things themselves.
| bad_good_guy wrote:
| I have just learned I'm the same way. I had actually never
| thought about it, but I had an unexpected physical negative
| reaction when I saw the stats on software developers so often
| pairing with other software developers.
|
| Just something about it turns my stomach. I hope its not some
| internalised misogyny, as I have no similar response to idea of
| a partner in any other high skilled job, such as physician, or
| barrister, or researcher, etc.
| afavour wrote:
| This was one of the reasons I moved to NYC many years ago over
| Silicon Valley. No doubt the career opportunities in SV would
| have been greater but the diversity in company (both friendly
| and romantic) has a lot going for it.
| maerF0x0 wrote:
| Funny enough, my anecdata has been the inverse. Thats is being
| a software engineer has been sufficient evidence for people to
| walk away without even getting to know me. Which is definitely
| interesting because I've had people say "I cant believe you're
| an engineer, you're nothing like the other engineers I know"
| outside my work context.
| robocat wrote:
| Wow - that is still happening? The initial interest followed
| by that sudden glazed disinterest as soon as they find out
| your job. Or is it location based where they have formed a
| stereotype from previous encounters? I had thought a well
| paying job would be a good start to a relationship (enough
| money does prevent a lot of problems). Personally I don't
| like judgmental people (I'm meta-judgemental) so it usually
| has been no great issue to be ignored.
| tiborsaas wrote:
| Are you me? Once I couldn't convince a girl that I'm a nerd.
|
| A colleague of mine dated a really hot girl from Tinder and I
| asked him if he told her that he's a software engineer.
|
| - Not yet, came the answer :)
| mschuster91 wrote:
| No surprises that those in exploitative working conditions - not
| payment, but _time_ - end up intermarrying the most: chefs,
| doctors, nurses... all of them have one thing in common:
| extremely long shifts, frequent overtime and double shifts.
|
| When living with a "normal" 9-5 person, that person _will_ build
| up resentment for not seeing their partner, for differing sleep
| schedules, frequent travel and whatever else comes with that job.
| Someone in a similar work environment however knows the struggles
| themselves and since they also have the same problem as their
| partners, there is less chance of resentment directed to the
| partner - hard to get annoyed by your partner working a
| spontaneous double shift when you have been in the same situation
| a week earlier!
| spullara wrote:
| Honestly the manicurists marrying other manicurists makes me
| think that the data is bad.
| [deleted]
| valbaca wrote:
| TFA: "Oftentimes, people marry someone in the same industry or
| with the same job."
| daveslash wrote:
| I clicked random for a while, just waiting to find a job with an
| usually high correlation with any other job. Pharmacist is
| unusually highly correlated with Pharmacist. Edit: Same with
| Lodging managers, high correlation with Lodging managers.
| TehShrike wrote:
| I was disappointed they didn't include "homemaker" or
| "unemployed" so you could see which professions supported a
| family by themselves.
| missedthecue wrote:
| I think you'd see a lot of professions of people who culturally
| value a homemaker, not anything about the highest paying
| careers. My guess is that the list you describe would be
| dominated by the trades, trucking, and small business
| ownership.
| pugworthy wrote:
| It would be nice if age or duration of marriage was also put into
| play. Additionally how much people moved. It's not always true,
| but sometimes one person in a relationship is the "portable" one
| who can find a job in many areas.
| Pasorrijer wrote:
| Boy, sure are a lot of professions married to teachers.
| dexwiz wrote:
| Lots of people are teachers. Also any of the heavily gendered
| professions appear this way because given a hetero
| relationship, there is a relatively high chance at least one
| person is in one of these.
|
| Lastly I know some people who avoiding marrying other teachers
| because the combined salary is less than many single
| professions.
| MattGaiser wrote:
| > Lastly I know some people who avoiding marrying other
| teachers because the combined salary is less than many single
| professions.
|
| I know some teacher couples that are busy coming to terms
| with this problem.
| golemiprague wrote:
| The missing filter there is by which gender, obviously many man
| will be married to nurses because there are so many female
| nurses but no so many women marry male nurses.
| handrous wrote:
| Teacher's a great pairing for any profession that might involve
| moving around quite a bit. Teaching jobs are available
| _everywhere_ and you 're probably not going to miss out on big
| bucks by being in one place versus another. Higher pay here,
| lower pay there, sure, but after CoL it mostly evens out.
|
| It's also damn near the only career in the US that provides
| roughly European levels of time off, and, crucially, pretty
| good (by US standards) parental leave. Time it right and you
| can be off for four months or so with your newborn, which is a
| _very_ rare benefit in the US (yeah, I know, some super-rich
| tech companies offer such perks, but those are uncommon jobs).
|
| Teacher's schedule also means that parent can usually handle
| afternoon-but-before-5 kid stuff, if the other parent's
| schedule's standard and inflexible.
| nathcd wrote:
| The article touches on this:
|
| > Some pairings are simply volume. There are a lot of nurses
| and teachers, so they show up on top of the list often.
| mcguire wrote:
| On the other hand, at UTAustin when I was there, the College
| of Engineering had a pretty serious lock on the College of
| Education---they frequently had social events together, for
| example.
| asimpletune wrote:
| I was not surprised to see that programmers marry other
| programmers
| Spivak wrote:
| The only one that I found that was stronger was Physicians
| which blows out the chart.
| azundo wrote:
| FTA "Other agricultural workers" is the highest at 23%.
| monkeybutton wrote:
| I am! Everywhere I've worked the gender imbalance is so extreme
| that it'd be impossible unless all the guys are married to each
| other.
| Aperocky wrote:
| Well it topped out at ~14%. At least it suggest women in
| programming quite heavily preferred their counterpart coders.
| bruceb wrote:
| Preferred, or just ratio is so skewed that they married who
| they interacted with all the time. Men could not do that as
| much as the were not enough women.
|
| In this regard women devs get added bonus of working tech.
| Relatively high salary and likely have higher family
| incomes as both partners work in high earning field. Where
| as male devs would often marry partners earning less.
| AmpsterMan wrote:
| Perhaps a disproportionate number of software devs are
| unmarried?
|
| My own experience actually reflects this situation. On my
| team, the only married people are married to other software
| people or teachers. The unmarried all date teachers.
|
| Obviously anecdotal but interesting.
| peruvian wrote:
| I am but I am not as well.
|
| I have found male programmers to have a more diverse
| dating/marriage pool, though most are still "tech"-y office
| jobs e.g. designer. That's just middle/upper middle class
| sticking together though.
|
| Female programmers I've met almost exclusively date or are
| married to other programmers.
| screye wrote:
| Well, there is an incredibly skewed gender ratio in
| programming.
|
| So, female programmers pretty much get the pick of the pack
| among their peer groups. (Not judging, just stating
| statistics)
|
| The other 80-ish% men in programming still need to find love
| somewhere, so they cast a wider net.
| peruvian wrote:
| Makes sense! Just surprised -- obviously love > all, but
| I'd prefer to date someone in a different field of work
| myself.
| screye wrote:
| Makes two of us.
|
| Tech communities are all-encompassing to begin with. Tech
| cities, tech friends, tech hobbies, tech side-
| projects..... I need out of this echo chamber from time
| to time.
| bcrosby95 wrote:
| Computer programmers and software developers are in separate
| groups. Developers marry eachother more often than programmers
| do, whatever that means.
| datameta wrote:
| I'd wager someone with the title computer programmer nowaday
| is close to or in their middle age at least, so perhaps it is
| the larger gender disparity in coding work among that
| generation.
| withinboredom wrote:
| I actually married a hairstylist. It turns out, a lot about
| programming and cutting hair are similar. She has to understand
| the requirements and implement it exactly right, the first
| time. I also learned that bartering is alive and well in that
| world. People would trade all kinds of things for a haircut
| that they didn't have to tell their spouse how much it cost:
| vacation rentals, private box concert tickets, sailing
| charters, etc. My wife worked in a high-end salon.
| MonaroVXR wrote:
| Stupid question, what is a high-end salon?
| valbaca wrote:
| Honestly, kind of boring results.
|
| - Volume wins out: there are lots of teachers and nurses
|
| - Like-marries-like: most marry someone in their own profession
|
| Not that boring is bad. Just interesting that the trends
| overshadow any kind of special results.
| Gunax wrote:
| Yea, I think a more interesting analysis would have based on
| frequency of profession. That is, how far away (+% / -%) from a
| random matching is it?
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